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Thread: Broken world

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    Pixie in the Playground
     
    Rademijas's Avatar

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    smile Broken world

    Hello...
    I would like to introduce to you my new comic called Broken world, which is made in "Order of the Stick style".

    cast:
    Spoiler
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    Translation from Czech:
    Spoiler
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    strip 1: here
    strip 2:here
    strip 3:here
    strip 4:here


    Thanks for comments
    Last edited by Rademijas; 2009-11-25 at 11:25 AM.
    Here you can read my new comic "Broken world"!

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    Pixie in the Playground
     
    Rademijas's Avatar

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    Default Re: Broken world

    sorry for doublepost but no one posted here!

    strip 1:
    Spoiler
    Show

    strip 2:
    Spoiler
    Show

    strip 3:
    Spoiler
    Show

    strip 4:
    Spoiler
    Show


    Have a fun and write!

    EDIT: For gods sake,can't you write any comment?
    Last edited by Rademijas; 2009-11-25 at 01:39 PM.
    Here you can read my new comic "Broken world"!

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    Troll in the Playground
     
    Green-Shirt Q's Avatar

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    Default Re: Broken world

    Quote Originally Posted by Rademijas View Post
    EDIT: For gods sake,can't you write any comment?
    Oh look, a comic about adventurers in a fantasy setting. What an intriguing premise. Never seen this before.

    ...I can't really tell what's going on in these comics, to be honest.

    Also, people don't tend to comment unless we have comics to comment on. Unless the story has been going on for a while, we don't really care about out-of-comic character bios. I recommend alerting everyone when you've made a comic with a new post. Don't care about double posting. Triple post only if you need to.
    Last edited by Green-Shirt Q; 2009-11-25 at 03:40 PM.
    AVATAR BATTLE ROYALE!
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    Pixie in the Playground
     
    Rademijas's Avatar

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    Default Re: Broken world

    ...I can't really tell what's going on in these comics, to be honest.
    Well,I can explain everything in next strips,so keep watching

    And thanks for your recommends...

    If I have time, new strip will be here tomorrow
    Here you can read my new comic "Broken world"!

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    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    EmeraldPhoenix's Avatar

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    Default Re: Broken world

    Hmm. I think this may have to do with not having English as your first language or something, but the dialouge in your comics is a bit...weird.

    For instance, the first thing that comes to mind: when you use the phrase "Let them to me", I think what you mean is "Let me at them".

    If you want, you could PM dialouge to me, first, and I could make sure it's alright. I'd be willing to do that.

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    Pixie in the Playground
     
    Rademijas's Avatar

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    Default Re: Broken world

    Quote Originally Posted by EmeraldPhoenix View Post
    Hmm. I think this may have to do with not having English as your first language or something, but the dialouge in your comics is a bit...weird.
    I am just ill...and English isn't my favourite subject in school,so I can't speak so...er....good.

    Of course thanks for comment
    Here you can read my new comic "Broken world"!

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    Dallas-Dakota's Avatar

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    Default Re: Broken world

    Quote Originally Posted by The Q View Post
    Oh look, a comic about adventurers in a fantasy setting. What an intriguing premise. Never seen this before.

    ...I can't really tell what's going on in these comics, to be honest.

    Also, people don't tend to comment unless we have comics to comment on. Unless the story has been going on for a while, we don't really care about out-of-comic character bios. I recommend alerting everyone when you've made a comic with a new post. Don't care about double posting. Triple post only if you need to.
    Hey, look on the bright side, at least it isn't just one big Author Self Insert.
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    Ceikatar!

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    Barbarian in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: Broken world

    Quote Originally Posted by Rademijas View Post
    I am just ill...and English isn't my favourite subject in school,so I can't speak so...er....good.

    Of course thanks for comment
    Still, though, I'd be happy to help make sure your comics are good, dialouge-wise. I have lots of experiance as a grammer cop, you know.

    I'm sure if I tried to make comics in French, they would turn out bloody awful...no matter how good my French teacher is. (I know you're not french, just an example.)

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    An Enemy Spy's Avatar

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    cool Re: Broken world

    Quote Originally Posted by Rademijas View Post
    I am just ill...and English isn't my favourite subject in school,so I can't speak so...er....good.

    Of course thanks for comment
    It's well, not good by the way. You can't speak so...er...well.

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    Barbarian in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: Broken world

    Quote Originally Posted by An Enemy Spy View Post
    It's well, not good by the way. You can't speak so...er...well.
    Ok, even I don't do that. Seriously, nobody does that.

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    Maximum Zersk's Avatar

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    Default Re: Broken world

    Well, it looks good, but the plot seems too close to OotS. Especially the first comic.

    A webcomic by Sahaar and I, Shadow of Fire. Read it!

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    Avatar by James Cameron. Or Michael Dante DiMartino and Bryan Konietzko. Oh wait, I mean Tom Siddell.

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    Thanks. I just happen to be a hug Grammar Nazi at times. Sorry if it bothers you at all.
    Regardless of whether that was intentional or not, I think I love you.


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    Pixie in the Playground
     
    Rademijas's Avatar

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    Default Re: Broken world

    Ok, my english teacher is sure proud of my english.

    Well, it looks good, but the plot seems too close to OotS. Especially the first comic.
    Yes, this is one kind of inspiration... "too-close-to-OotS" inspiration
    Last edited by Rademijas; 2009-11-27 at 02:56 PM.
    Here you can read my new comic "Broken world"!

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