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  1. - Top - End - #661
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    Kroozer101's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    1754. My Rogue may not be a "pimp", nor may he title himself "Le Big Mac Daddy Playa de Carabas".

    1754 (a). No matter how much the ladies love him.

    1755. That's not the way, uh-huh uh-huh, I like it.

    1756. "Fireball" is not romantic.

    1756 (a). Even if I'm lighting candles.

    1757. No matter what, I do not get a +2 to Intimidate if my Rogue exposes himself.

    1757 (a). No, even if it's that large.

    1758. No, I am not "corrupted by the power of the Dark Side".
    Last edited by Kroozer101; 2011-06-24 at 05:45 PM.
    Sigs are for losers.


    Wait...

  2. - Top - End - #662
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    Mercenary Pen's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    1759. It may very well be the eye of the (dire) tiger, but I must not sing about it.

    1759a. Even if I resist the obvious choice of song and come up with something more original.
    Part of YugiohITP
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    Warning: This post may contain traces of nuts, madness and/or sarcasm, you have been warned.

  3. - Top - End - #663
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    BardGirl

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    1760. If a bullet that missed should be in the area I'm in, I could shove it up my enemy's nose, but it will be treated like an unarmed strike.
    Last edited by ORione; 2011-06-25 at 10:38 AM.
    Notable and Quotable
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    Quote Originally Posted by BladeofOblivion View Post
    A NE Character with Perform (Sing and Dance).

    That alone pretty much narrows it down to an Evil Bard or a Disney Character.
    Quote Originally Posted by Asta Kask View Post
    Clearly the solution to everything is to binge on Girlscout cookies.
    Quote Originally Posted by nogall View Post
    The Snarl could be a hacker code that became self-conscious, and would start posting gibberish and chaotic lines. But if you click its spoiler tags enough times, it would reveal a meta-fanfiction.

  4. - Top - End - #664
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    OldWizardGuy

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    1761. My character is not allowed to attempt to train the bear while it's chasing us.

    1762. My character is not allowed time to himself.

    1763.My character can not use polymorph to remove: skin,organs, brain cells,bones.

    1764.My character can not use polymorph to warp their mind to make them believe they've always worked for me.

    1765.I can't use contigency: true resurrection in a X-crawl campaign.

    1766. I am not allowed to flood the underdark with compost heap in hopes of "smoking them out".

    1767. Polymorph is for making yourself bigger not causing nuclear explosions.

    1768. I am not allowed to try and tame the epic level faerie beast in hopes of fighting the tarrasque.

    1769. Nor am I allowed to use it "just to pick up milk"

    1770. Stop buying constructs just to play cards with them.

    1771. When your mind is under control "moving" is not one of the things you'd never do and it does not allow a will save.

    1772.Just because you're an immortal bard (stasis clone since babylonian times) doesn't mean you can take the wrap for all the great crimes. Examples: Black Plague, Jack the Ripper, WW1, the fall of the ottoman empire,tunguska event, the dinosaurs.

    1773. The mithral golem is called a mithral golem not "Pepito"

    1774. The iron golem is called an iron golem not "Big Jim"

    1775. You do not own a golem dealership.

    1776. The constructs are not "gay for you"

    1777. Stop plotting to burn down down the primal fey realm because a faerie pushed you.

    1778. I can not use the psion's Time hop power to skip past the big crunch and the big bang and end up in the place I am now just because the dm is making up everything and it bothers me.

    1779. I am not allowed to do anything I saw in disney.

    1780. That includes singing the work's of Alladin.

    1781. Not allowed to invent the chainsaw.

    1782. Stop quoting Ash Williams.

    1783. I am not allowed to use the troll on our team for jerky.

    1784. Nor am I allowed to use a tarrasque for jerky.

    1785. Even if I do have a few thousand stasis clones lying around I can not keep trying to date the drow matriach because I could survive it.

    1786. Stop using Stasis clone to create an army of bad guys to throw at other bad guys.

    1787. When someone says that's impossible they are not challenging me.

    1788. I am not allowed near the dwarven mining industry any more.

    1789. Not allowed to use the laid off dwarven miners as cheap labor.

    1790. Stop asking the strongest character to do a "fastball special" because you think you're bound to crit eventually.

    PM me if you want the story on one of these.
    Last edited by Doomboy911; 2011-06-25 at 09:07 AM.
    This is horrifying beyond anything Lovecraft ever wrote or Giger ever drew.

    MCulpa http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JVopG...el_video_title
    http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=192558





    (Screw the point)-Doomboy911

  5. - Top - End - #665
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    The_Final_Stand's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    1791: Demons, Daemons and Devils are evil. Bargaining with them is always, always, always a bad idea.

    1792: May not kill party members for XP. Not even if I'm chaotic/evil.

    1793: No, my character can not kill God. No matter how well I've optimised him/her/it.
    I Wanna Be the Guy Kid avatar by Ceika. Many thanks.

    If I win, I get to be a king. If I lose, then I get to be a legend.

  6. - Top - End - #666
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    BardGuy

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    1794: I am not allowed to play FATAL.

    1795: I am not allowed to skip to the end of the thread and hope I am not copying anyone.

  7. - Top - End - #667
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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    1796: My Bard does not get the spell "Conjure Broadway-style Musical Number"
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    Proud child of the Enlightenment

    Captain Kirk: [Listen], there are a million things in this universe you can have and there are a million things you can't have. It's no fun facing that but that's the way things are.

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  8. - Top - End - #668
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    OldWizardGuy

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    1797. "He was getting uppity with me" is not how you answer for your actions.

    1798. Stop shouting "EL KABOMB" after you hit the enemies with your guitar.

    1799. Must stop trying to commit suicide when the encounter gets too hard just because I have stasis clones lying around.

    1800. After hitting the adamantine golem with my signature hat weapon I can not go and put the hat on the troll and say it was him.

    1801. I can not use a jabberwock as a mount.

    1802. Stop trying to rig the fights in X-crawl so you can earn more money on your bets with the fairies.

    1803. Stop using baleful polymorph to start up a bunny farm.

    1804. Your golem's are for defending your homestead not killing bunnies.

    1805. Stop recruiting homeless folk as an army.

    1806. Stop recruiting the homeless community just to play cards with the golem.

    1807. When you have: a rope, a sword, and an encounter made of made up junk committing suicide by hanging yourself from the sword is not the proper response.

    1808. Spark Lizards are not batteries.

    1809. Nor are they defibrilattors.

    1810. If everyone laughs at the thought that is not the green light to do it.

    1811. The difference between rogues and bards is not "bards can carry a tune"

    1812. Asking the fellow players to step on your head is not how you handle the adamantine golem. Even if you do have stasis clones.

    1813. You can not use the cleric for a sled even if he does cover himself in salve of slipperiness.

    1814. Siege weaponry is not a proper weapon for x-crawl.

    1815. Neither are grenades.

    1816. No revolvers either.

    1817. Keep the chainsaws out of x-crawl.

    1818. If someone casts dispel magic on my daylight spell it does not mean my batteries died.

    1819. When the dm says that one vampire can't drink all the blood from a T-rex it does not mean hire more.

    1820. Having your hand chopped off is not a good excuse to replace it with chainsaw. Especially if I did it to myself.

    1821. Even if Ash Williams did it.

    1822. When you know a monster is behind the door animating the door and walking away is not how you handle the fight.

    1823. "Because I had a pun for it" is not how one justifies their actions.

    1824. No one in my party is getting uppity with me.

    1825. Paintball guns filled with holy water, acid, poison, unholy water, and lemonade do not belong in X-crawl.

    Again pm me if you want to hear the story behind these.
    This is horrifying beyond anything Lovecraft ever wrote or Giger ever drew.

    MCulpa http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JVopG...el_video_title
    http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=192558





    (Screw the point)-Doomboy911

  9. - Top - End - #669
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    slaydemons's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    1826. I am not allowed to paint a bulleye on the fighter
    1827. expecially when we are in a gladiatorial ring
    I am a pirate now, thanks to serpentine
    I too have a 3ds, my friend safari is Spheal, beartic, dewgong
    Message me for my code

  10. - Top - End - #670
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    DwarfFighterGuy

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    Quote Originally Posted by HalfDragonCube View Post
    Isn't there a whole PrC for that? You know, the one with the capstone of 'you are ascended to the celestial realm and never seen again'.
    I know, but I wasn't talking about doing it just to get into that PrC. I just thought it would be cool being a martyr....

    Quote Originally Posted by Doomboy911
    1773. The mithral golem is called a mithral golem not "Pepito"

    1774. The iron golem is called an iron golem not "Big Jim"
    1828: I am not allowed to name my gargantuan flesh golem "Big John" just so I can refer to him as "BJ".
    1828a: This also applies to anything that can have a name.

    1829: It's Large Hadron Collider, NOT Large Hardon Collider.
    1829a: I am not allowed to offer my description of what a Large Hardon Collider is and how it works.
    1829b: If I do the above, I am not allowed to complain when the DM kills my character on principle.

    1830: If I figure out the source the DM is copying almost word for word for this adventure, I am not allowed to "accidentally" break the plot-critical item (that no one knows is plot critical yet of course!) just to see how the DM responds.
    Been there, fought that, died horribly.

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  11. - Top - End - #671
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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    1831. I am not allowed to construct a Warforged with my artificer. Not even if I have the Craft Construct feat.

    1832. If I somehow sneakily convinced my DM that taking the Leadership feat would allow me to craft my own cohort, I am not allowed to make him into a Warforged Artificer who crafts his own followers that are all level 1 Warforged Artificers.

    1833. Even if I have the Powerful Build trait, I am not allowed to pick up Small sized enemies (after I have defeated them) and throw them at the party's cleric in an effort to make "Gnomeball" a national past time.

    1834. If I ever kick a squirrel again just because it's running playfully around my legs after I cut down the tree it was in for firewood, I will be changed to Chaotic Evil temporarily, no matter how much I point out that my feet deal nonlethal damage.

    1835. I am not allowed to ever question why my DM's creatures have d12 hit dice despite their type being something other than undead or dragons. She will stop the game for ten minutes, log onto Giant, and homebrew a new template or race that has d12 hit dice and Con to HP. And she'll throw on the undead immunity to Fort saves just for me slowing the game down, fluff be damned.

    1836. I am not allowed to play male bards.

    1837. I am definitely not allowed to play lesbian bards.

    1838. I am not allowed to play rogues with max ranks in Perform (Sing) and a few levels of illusionist.

    1839. I am not allowed to play paladins unless I sign a contract swearing that I will, under no circumstances, quote or paraphrase Powder Keg of Justice.
    Sweet sorcerer avatar by Cuthalion

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  12. - Top - End - #672
    Dwarf in the Playground
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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    1840. When playing a centaur, I can not take leadership to acquire a jockey.
    1840a. No, I can't do the above as an awakened horse either.
    1840b. Or any other quadruped.
    1840c. Or if my character has no legs at all.
    1840d. No, not for a bipedal character either.
    1840e. Dang it. Just no jockeys.

  13. - Top - End - #673
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    OldWizardGuy

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    I feel as though I could fill up the rest of thread with my antics despite the fact that I've been in five games two of which I was the dm.

    1841. My character did not bone the pale night mother of demons from 4th edition especially since we're playing 3.5.

    1842. Even if he could survive it.

    1843. The immortal bard is not allowed to come up with plans of attack that he's sure he'll live through.

    1844. Not allowed a ring of X-ray vision in a X-crawl campaign so I can see what's coming.

    1845. Don't use the pied piping spell to have the faeries limbo through cacti.

    1846. The proper response to shambling mounds is not to hire more gardeners.

    1847. Not allowed to take over the artic because no one is there.

    1848. Not allowed to wish for a country in the artic that I owned.

    1849. Not allowed to use said country to burrow into the underdark and try to take over it.

    1850. Not allowed a country just to house my homeless man army and golems.

    1851. Stop trying to get diplomatic immunity in an X-crawl campaign.

    1852. When trying to railroad the party back to the town a Tarrasque is not what I'm to use.

    1853. Especially if they're only level 2.

    1854. When we think the world is about to end I'm to try and save the day not pack up all my stuff head to my own demiplane and watch the fireworks.

    1855. Not allowed to sell tickets to watch the end of the world.

    1856. Must stop getting the group to start singing "the babe with the power" from "Labyrinth".

    1857. Stop getting everyone to quote "Spaceballs".

    1858. The troll on our team is not to be used as a shield especially if I'm immortal.

    1859. Neither is the necromancer.

    1860. Stop mocking the necromancer.

    1861. When the necromancer has a fortress of solitude I am not to keep rushing in over and over again until I get through.

    1862. I should stop invading the bad guy's dreams.

    1863. Not allowed in Ronald Reagan's dreams either (tried to, couldn't get in)

    1864. Just because the troll on our team is using m&m's as a weapon I am not to respond with Skittles.

    1865. Not allowed to animate a few thousand Skittles to make a Skittles golem.

    1866. Not allowed to hire Succubus to be my cheerleaders.

    1867. Even if they do have spirit, yes they do.

    1868. When magically forced to the bottom of a water trap I am not to start singing "under the sea" even if I can breathe underwater.

    1869. My time alone in the woods did not warp my mind (because I was only in there for five minutes.)

    1870. Not allowed to tamper with the traps I'm sure we're going to get into.

    1871. Freedom of Movement does not make me immune to cuddling.

    1872. When I survive having my mind and body warped by an Eldritch abominations "wheee do it again, do it again" is not the proper response.

    1873. Not allowed to throw an Iron Golem at a mostly magic based party.

    1874. Not allowed to plan how to kill the party ahead of time.

    1875. When I have enough gold that I can buy forty Apparatus's of a crab I am to spend it on items to improve my character not start up a cockfight with apparatus of a crab.

    1876. In an X-crawl campaign I am not to spoil the illusions with my hat.

    1877. When I know a minotaur will be on our team I am not to have my character come in dressed up as a cowboy.

    1878. Not allowed to try and blind the Beholder with a spotlight.

    1879. Not allowed to animate every part of my house. That includes the boards and nails.

    1880. There's a reason a bag of holding doesn't go in a portable hole and I'm not allowed to find out why.

    1881. Not allowed to look up the Goofy Scream when I fall a good distance.

    1882. Nor should I do this whenever someone else falls a good distance.

    1883. Not allowed to unleash 1,000 awakened squirrels with levels in Wizard.

    1884. I am not to give out team jerseys with bullseyes on them. Even if I don't like that guy.

    1885. Must refrain from getting into an insult war with the dwarf enemy. Even if I did see better beards on girl scouts.

    1886. Stop kidnapping the homeless for my empire.

    1887. I should have a better plan than "go for the crotch". Especially if it's an epic level force of nature.

    1888. Can't have my golem pet the Heck Hound to death.

    1889. Shouldn't use level 0 spells to blow up cars.

    1890. Not allowed to enlist pixies to help blow up cars.

    1891. Me and my golem are not allowed to go on a rampage because we could outlive life imprisonment.

    1892. Not allowed to animate a train, give it the power to fly and breath fire just so I can do a prison break.

    1893. Not allowed to just crash the train into the building the bad guy is in.

    1894. Not allowed to use polymorph any object to turn pennies into black holes.

    1895. Nor am I allowed to use it to make dying stars to make black holes.

    1896. Not allowed to cast Earthquake in a populated city.

    1897. Even if it is Detroit because the people will notice.

    1898. Not allowed to use hideous laughter for bad jokes.

    1899. Not allowed to have a Vorpal Rubber Chicken.

    1900. When someone gets hit by Otto's irresitble dance and starts doing disco moves helping them does not include using illusions to make him look like John Travolta.
    Last edited by Doomboy911; 2011-06-29 at 01:41 AM.
    This is horrifying beyond anything Lovecraft ever wrote or Giger ever drew.

    MCulpa http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JVopG...el_video_title
    http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=192558





    (Screw the point)-Doomboy911

  14. - Top - End - #674
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    NeoSeraphi's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    1901. I am not allowed to take the Leadership feat to attract prostitutes and have my Cohort stay behind to run my brothel and act as a bodyguard.

    1902. Not even if by being 2 levels below me he is actually stronger than the entire town put together.

    1903. I am especially not allowed to do 1901 as a beguiler named Loki Manipulato who has a poorly done mafia accent.

    1904. I am not allowed to give the Rakasha Polymorph as a spell known

    1905. I am not allowed to be a true neutral character.

    1906. Especially if I am the only person in my party with Knowledge (The Planes)

    1907. If I am the only person in my party with Knowledge (The Planes) and the rest of my party is of good alignment, I should really tell them that the Rakasha they're intervening to save from the Coatl is Lawful Evil, instead of keeping it to myself because "the tiger looks bad ass".

    1908. I am not allowed to stack Web and Stinking Cloud on my players, especially if the sorcerer who will never make his Strength check or Fortitude save is the only way the party will beat through the DR/15 good.

    1909. I am not allowed to touch strange glowing swords we are sent by our questgiver to collect.

    1910. Especially if I have the lowest Will save in the party

    1910b. Even more so if my Will save is actually negative

    1910c. And definitely if the entire party combined could not stop me from killing them should I be dominated.

    1911. Frenzied Berserker is not an actual class. I just keep failing my Will saves against that permanent illusion spell WotC put on page 34 of Complete Warrior.

    1912. I am not allowed to homebrew a Frenzied Berserker class based on the aforementioned illusion.

    1912b. Especially if I change the DC of the Will save to resist being Frenzied for my teammates to 20+my new Strength modifier.

    1913. Inspire Frenzy does not affect all rabbits within 30 feet of me.

    1914. Getting a potion of speak with animals and making a Handle Animal check, spending 30 minutes of game time learning everything I can about a rabbit, and asking him to be best friends with me does not make him my "ally" for the purposes of Inspire Frenzy.

    1915. The house rule that two natural 20s in a row automatically kills a foe vulnerable to critical hits does not apply when the creature rolling the two natural 20s was a frenzied rabbit attacking a Gargantuan red dragon.
    Sweet sorcerer avatar by Cuthalion

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  15. - Top - End - #675
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    OldWizardGuy

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    1916. My frenzied berserker can not be a poet at heart. Because we're playing pathfinder.

    1917. When rule 1916 is broken I can not name them after indestructible things, like cockroach, tardigrade, diamond.

    1918. Never allowed to have a wall blade.

    1918. B. Especially a large size one because there is not that much metal in the world.

    1919. Can't play a drunken master.

    1920.Do not throw the halfing (self-imposed rule)

    1921. When DMing I should not play the drow like a couple from an old Leave it to Beaver family.

    1922. When we fight ghosts I am not allowed to say "that's not a ghost it has no bed sheet"

    1923. Definately not allowed to whip out a proton pack. Even if I do know how they're made.

    1924. Radioactive material is not allowed in X-crawl.

    1925. Especially if it's for the spell "create nuke"

    1926. When my bard can destroy an armored vehicle with just two cantrips I'm being two creative.

    1927. Should not animate the enemy's heavily armed helicopter just because I'm having trouble knocking out the guys driving it (unbelievably funny)

    1928. Not allowed to teach the half fiend fighter how to properly break into a tank with his imp sword. (I told him that he could stab a hole in the door, force the sword through and have it turn back into an imp and unlock it. Not allowed because of the next one.)

    1929. Not allowed to make atomic bomb noises when the troll casts meteor swarm on the aformentioned tank.

    1930. The titanic toad does not exist. Nor does any homebrewed version of it.

    1931. The mighty master of magic, controller of all logic and nature had better have a better name than Moe.

    1932. Hellboy is to be observed not outdone.

    1933. The bard musn't stalk the clown. (big story)

    1934. When the DM gives us magic devices fitted to our personalities I am not allowed to ask for "tradesies".

    1935. When I get saved from a water trap I shouldn't start praising aquaman. Especially when I know the name of the guy who saved me.

    Feel free to pm me on these.
    This is horrifying beyond anything Lovecraft ever wrote or Giger ever drew.

    MCulpa http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JVopG...el_video_title
    http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=192558





    (Screw the point)-Doomboy911

  16. - Top - End - #676
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    Temassasin's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    1936: i may not spend all my time taking over a kingdom
    1936a: if i do i can't succeed
    1946b:if i do then i may not use the citizens as cannon folder when i'm CG
    Awesome avatar by Threeshades
    look for my community dungeon building thread http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showt...1#post10591561
    At least with Chaos you know where you stand which is everywhere and anywhere" Forum Explorer

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  17. - Top - End - #677
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    MesiDoomstalker's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    1947: I may not, as a DM, introduce a magical trap with clear mechanical parts with possibly detachable magical parts that may or may not be able to be removed and used as a magical gun by my players.
    1948: I may not, as a DM, introduce a circular room without immiediatly pointing out all possible exit routes.
    1949: I may never have acess to Detect Magic as an at will SLA.
    1950a: I may not, as a DM, present Disney villians to my players as some body they may not attack immidiatly on sight.
    1950b: If 1950a does happen, I may not make said villians be epic+ in level and sufficient power to TPK in less than 2 rounds if my players to attack on sight.
    1950c: If 1950a and b happens, and my players have gotten wise and stopped instantly attacking Disney villians, I may not have the villian force them to be his subserviants, using epic magic .

  18. - Top - End - #678
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    Grongore's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    1951: 10 gp worth of free bolts isnt worth putting a stink bomb in a house and pissing off every merchant
    1952: make sure to note a good person to act decoy, dont use the useless one he might be useless as a decoy too
    "hey, my party may be stupid, they're not that stupid" -Droknar

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  19. - Top - End - #679
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    DwarfFighterGuy

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    Quote Originally Posted by Grongore View Post
    1952: make sure to note a good person to act decoy, dont use the useless one he might be useless as a decoy too
    1953: If I know that I am going to be the decoy, I am not allowed to just wing it with no escape plan in mind.
    1953a: Even if it worked spectacularly.
    1953b: Especially if the DM cares more about my character dying then I do.
    Been there, fought that, died horribly.

    Something fun and flavorful to get your DM throwing books at you: Katana Chucker



  20. - Top - End - #680
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    HalfDragonCube's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    1954. Casting Grease on a slope, followed by Blockade is not an excuse to say 'Fear my wooden blocks of doom!' as it hurtles towards an enemy.
    1954a. Nor may this be on a cliff edge just to have all of the fighters bull rush me to the other side of the chasm once I climb on.
    Last edited by HalfDragonCube; 2011-07-08 at 08:46 AM.
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  21. - Top - End - #681
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    DwarfFighterGuy

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    1955: Tentacle monsters are not allowed to exist in any game in which I am a player or DM.

    1956: I am not allowed to look around at the random plushies/action figures/dolls/whatever I have in my apartment for character concepts.
    1956a: Especially if the one I settle on is Luka Megurine.
    1956b: ESPECIALLY if it is a "swords and sorcery" campaign.
    1956c: When the DM gets annoyed, I am not allowed to remind him of how lucky he is that I don't have any Pokemon anymore.

    1957: If the DM says "all books allowed", he really means "all books allowed EXCEPT Erotic Fantasy".
    1957a: Especially if a kid will be joining us for that game. (In my defense, I didnt know about this until after the fact)

    1958: I am not allowed to use jpop as "background music", because apparently jpop doesn't lend itself well to being in the background.
    1958a: And apparently I am the only one at the table that can listen to it for more then 5 minutes without getting a headache.

    1959: Any idea I get from Dungeons & Doritos is instantly vetoed.

    1960: I am not allowed to turn myself into a car for any reason.
    Been there, fought that, died horribly.

    Something fun and flavorful to get your DM throwing books at you: Katana Chucker



  22. - Top - End - #682
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    KoboldRevenge's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    1961: Not allowed to have my Cat familiar leave a "surprise" in my enemy's shoes.

    1962: Not allowed to invent electricity and make money off the commoners.

    1963: Can't Reveal at a opportune moment that "my character was hiding wings under his clothes and flew away from the danger."

    1964: Can't challenge the big bad to a Breakin contest.
    Last edited by KoboldRevenge; 2011-07-11 at 10:12 PM.
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  23. - Top - End - #683
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    OldWizardGuy

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    1965. No one is EVER allowed to tell my character "just do what makes you happy"

    1966.Can't challenge anyone to a fight.

    1967. Especially if I say I'm willing to blindfold myself to even the odds.Because I have pseudodragon to tell me what's happening and the blindfold doesn't really matter.

    1968. Can't illusion clothes on and just walk out in armor.(because they have true seeing).

    1969. Don't threaten the troll with the daylight spell because you got the idea from Tolkien.

    1970. Not allowed to cast shrink item on clothing.

    1971. Especially if it's women's clothing.

    1971 A. Especially if it's for a distraction.

    1972. Not allowed smoke bombs that double as hallucinogenics.

    1973. Not allowed to invent "Batman"

    1974. Never allowed sovereign glue.

    1975. As DM I am not allowed to give the party of level one a free wish just so I can twist it.

    1976. When the barbarian tries to remove the window from the wall quietly instead of just opening it and climbing through I can not have it shatter into a thousand pieces waking up everyone.

    1977. Can't say a rock fell on it when they demand an explanation for how it broke.
    This is horrifying beyond anything Lovecraft ever wrote or Giger ever drew.

    MCulpa http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JVopG...el_video_title
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    (Screw the point)-Doomboy911

  24. - Top - End - #684
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    DwarfFighterGuy

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    Quote Originally Posted by Doomboy911 View Post
    1968. Can't illusion clothes on and just walk out in armor.(because they have true seeing).
    1978: Can't illusion clothes on and just walk out naked (to give anyone with true seeing something to look at ).
    1978a: Especially if my character is a troll, flesh golem, or anything else considered "butt ugly" by the society we are living in.
    1978b: This goes double if I also illusion myself into being an attractive woman.
    Been there, fought that, died horribly.

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  25. - Top - End - #685
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    HalfDragonCube's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    1979. As a DM, I may not place antimagic fields wherever I feel like one would be interesting.
    1980. I may not put a skill point in Speak Language (Pirate)

    My, aren't we getting close to the 2000 things?
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  26. - Top - End - #686
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    Trufflehound's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    1981. As a DM, I may not place area-affecting Hold Person traps.

  27. - Top - End - #687
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    KoboldRevenge's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    1982 Can't Go get ideas from a movie in the middle of a game.

    1983 Can't hum the same song over and over. Till friends are doing it too.

    1984 Not allowed to enter godhood by having ants worship me.

    1985 Not allowed to kill the guy with the clue to where the treasure is.
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    MesiDoomstalker's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    1986a: I may not, as a DM, give the players options on which group they wish to try to ally and make all the other options become enemies because NPC's that aren't observed suck at everything unless they are against the party, at which point, they become extremly good at everything.
    1986b: Especailly when the allied NPC that accompanies my players does most of the talking and convincing.
    1987: I may not allow my players the option to have allies with an ECL higher than the average party level -10.
    1988a I may not play a character who can move faster than the party monk and stll be effective in all situations.
    1988b:Especially if said character can make more attacks per round while using a single weapon (no TWF) than the monk or the TWF Rogue.
    1989: I may not play a character who defies an archetype. (Ex: A wizard whos afraid of magic)
    1990: I may only adopt a prestige class if I'm vastly underleveled compared to the rest of my group.
    1991a: I may not make any homebrew material I created.
    1991b: Even if it was designed and actually functions as a tier 4 or below
    1992a: I may not have access to the Permancy spell
    1992b: Even if 1992a is ignored, I may not ask for revisions to what spells Permancy can be used with.
    1992c: Even if its for the benefit for other, non-optimizing, players.
    1993: I may not be able to fight natural disaters like they are monsters.
    1994: I may not use a Healbot Cleric when I know the campaign will focus mainly against Undead.
    1995: I may not have an effective Caster Level 3x my level.
    1996a: I may not use any class with a large selection of spells.
    1996b: I may not play any class who automatically gains access to it's entire spell list at any given level.
    1997a: I may not have a guitar, electric or acoustic, as my Bard's instrument.
    1997b: Especially if its enchanted to shoot out Lightning Bolt spells with a caster level equal to my Bard levels, whenever I hit a power cord.
    1997c: Even more especially if hitting a power cord is the only way to activate any Bardic Music ability as it counts as a Bardic Music usage.
    1998: I may never have access to Relics. EVER!
    1999a: My Fighter may not be better than everything in melee.
    1999b: And ranged.
    1999c: Especially if he is better than a Rogue, TWF Ranger, Archer Ranger, Scout, Warblade, and a Swordsage in both melee AND ranged. (this seriously happened in a no-magic campaign).
    2000: Will be left for someone else! (Note, 2000 is still open, have at it somebody)
    Last edited by MesiDoomstalker; 2011-07-13 at 08:49 PM.

  29. - Top - End - #689
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    Omeganaut's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    2000. I will not give the party munchkin a copy of this thread!
    I have returned, and plan on focusing on world-building. Issues are being dealt with.

    Quote Originally Posted by MesiDoomstalker View Post
    Thread won! I don't think I have the authority to do that but whatever

  30. - Top - End - #690
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    MesiDoomstalker's Avatar

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    Default Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG

    Quote Originally Posted by Omeganaut View Post
    2000. I will not give the party munchkin a copy of this thread!
    Thread won! I don't think I have the authority to do that but whatever

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