Crack Pairings VIII - We Need A Half-Elf Template

[Asta Kask]

Oh yeah, they placed first in the county. I'll see how they do in states next week.

I prefer a trebuchet myself. Gets the bunnies farther.

We need a basket of kittens, stat!

Can you get some down at the shelter? Or is that only during summertime?

And we haven't had a song in a while. It's dedicated to :

Spoiler

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Don't touch your lips
Don't wear your hair like that
I feel your presence all around me
Don't get too close
Don't move your eyes like that
Because they're deep enough to drown me
It don't get hot like this in Heaven
You fool me with your angel face
Your master knows where I'm my weakest

Mercy please, I'm on my knees
You're my temptation
Measure my faith, the devil's awake
He knows you're my temptation

Don't call my name
Don't brush my cheek like that
I curse the day that I found you
Don't touch my skin
Don't dance around like that
I feel damnation all around you
And so I raise my voice to Heaven
Please hide me in some holy place
Protect my soul, I'm only human

Mercy please, I'm on my knees
You're my temptation
Look down and see
Deliver me from my dark sensation
Give me faith, don't let me waste
You're my temptation

Come to me
You're such a liar
Won't you come to me
Move closer to the fire
Just come to me
No, no, no
Won't you come to me I will set you free
No, no, no

Mercy please, I'm on my knees
You're my temptation
Measure my faith, the devil's awake
He knows you're my temptation
Mercy please, I'm on my knees
You're my temptation
Go away in Heaven's name
You're my temptation
Go away, just go away
My dark sensation

[Lix Lorn]

If it was O-Chul, i think loving a Paladin could help her on the straight and narrow.

...Tiasal multiclass to paladin? XD MYSTIC THEURGE
Just to annoy Tsukiko.

[Draconi Redfir]

could you even go mystic theurge as a pally? dont you need cleric?

it would kinda make sence for her to go sorceress/cleric, given her pairentige, but thats just me.

but if she DID multiclass to pally, would the pole grow in her butt on its own? or would we need to insert it ourselves? (keep master away from her while we are doing that!)

[CoffeeIncluded]

Can you get some down at the shelter? Or is that only during summertime?

And we haven't had a song in a while. It's dedicated to :

Spoiler

Show

Don't touch your lips
Don't wear your hair like that
I feel your presence all around me
Don't get too close
Don't move your eyes like that
Because they're deep enough to drown me
It don't get hot like this in Heaven
You fool me with your angel face
Your master knows where I'm my weakest

Mercy please, I'm on my knees
You're my temptation
Measure my faith, the devil's awake
He knows you're my temptation

Don't call my name
Don't brush my cheek like that
I curse the day that I found you
Don't touch my skin
Don't dance around like that
I feel damnation all around you
And so I raise my voice to Heaven
Please hide me in some holy place
Protect my soul, I'm only human

Mercy please, I'm on my knees
You're my temptation
Look down and see
Deliver me from my dark sensation
Give me faith, don't let me waste
You're my temptation

Come to me
You're such a liar
Won't you come to me
Move closer to the fire
Just come to me
No, no, no
Won't you come to me I will set you free
No, no, no

Mercy please, I'm on my knees
You're my temptation
Measure my faith, the devil's awake
He knows you're my temptation
Mercy please, I'm on my knees
You're my temptation
Go away in Heaven's name
You're my temptation
Go away, just go away
My dark sensation

Only during the summer. Then we get over 80 a week...

But who would resist her?

If it was O-Chul, i think loving a Paladin could help her on the straight and narrow.

Maybe. HEY! WATER-SMURF!

[Zanaril]

HEY! WATER-SMURF!

We've already discussed the possibility of Deirdre/O-chul, and how he could possibly drag her out of her crazy...

[Water-Smurf]

Damn work taking up all my time...

Work? What is this work of which you speak?

Doesn't help Tiasal, although it would allow Right-Eye/Xykon.

I have difficulty seeing how that could turn out well.

...STOP GIVING ME IDEAS! D:

Let's hear this first though.

Well, one, once she's an adult it's a free-for-all, regardless of the creepiness factor. Two, all I really need to do is use a plot point I already was planning on using for something else.

You've forgotten two things.
A. O-Chul has a con score in the mid 20s.
B. Smite. Evil.

Can you Smite Evil with just fists?

If it was O-Chul, i think loving a Paladin could help her on the straight and narrow.

...Huh. Actually, O-Chul would be a pretty good counter love interest to Xykon. A paragon of what's good and righteous versus the paragon of all that's evil and wicked, both of which showing off a side of the 'father' archetype.

Maybe. HEY! WATER-SMURF!

It's true, though. Xykon is the love interest that keeps her in madness and manipulates her to evil ends. O-Chul would be the love interest who keeps her on her meds and gives her the clarity and independence to decide on what she wants.

We've already discussed the possibility of Deirdre/O-chul, and how he could possibly drag her out of her crazy...

Best case scenario? Tiasal/O-Chul, and avoid the whole crazy 'destroy the world' thing. Although O-Chul, if he plays his cards right, can get Deirdre away from Xykon.

[Zanaril]

...STOP GIVING ME IDEAS! D:

Isn't it better to have spare ideas at hand for when you need them?

[The Dark Fiddler]

Can you Smite Evil with just fists?

Yes. Relevant text:

Smite Evil (Su)

Once per day, a paladin may attempt to smite evil with one normal melee attack. She adds her Charisma bonus (if any) to her attack roll and deals 1 extra point of damage per paladin level. If the paladin accidentally smites a creature that is not evil, the smite has no effect, but the ability is still used up for that day.

[Taekwondodo]

Work? What is this work of which you speak?

What? You think I can pay bills with crack-pairings?

Actually it's not a "proper" job, just for while I was at university. Trying to find a real job now but so far not getting anywhere.

On topic I have ideas for the tunes but I need to wait for my brother to get off his bum and install a program for me to allow me to write the score. Scene four looks like it will have actual dialogue in song. Whee!

[CoffeeIncluded]

Can you Smite Evil with just fists?

Allow me to present my response.

See you guys later...Lot of things to do... And apparently I'm not leaving for 2 hours. Just wasted an hour of my life.

[Asta Kask]

could you even go mystic theurge as a pally? dont you need cleric?

You need to be able to cast 3rd-level divine spells, and she would need to be... oh, high level (12 or something). It would be about the worst combination possible, (except Bard/Ranger), but it would be possible.

[Lix Lorn]

Why is PaladinSorcerer bad? Paladin is fighty and hitty, Sorceress is explodey and magicky. Seems like you cover everything. XD

[Asta Kask]

Why is PaladinSorcerer bad? Paladin is fighty and hitty, Sorceress is explodey and magicky. Seems like you cover everything. XD

Yes, but all you get from MT is the Paladin's spell progression - which sucks. Go for Eldritch Knight instead.

[Asta Kask]

And apparently I'm not leaving for 2 hours. Just wasted an hour of my life.

Right. You could have been writing Crack pairings.

[Debatra]

Please forgive the new guy, but can we make requests here, or is that a different thread?

[icastflare!]

a new guy, yaay!

you can and not guaranteed but someone might get to it. iv got time, so spout one out if you wish

[Lix Lorn]

I'd offer, but i am very very slow.
Is that an undead paladin avatar?

(Eldritch Knight. Woo. XD)

[icastflare!]

you mean mine ?

[Lix Lorn]

Yes. I do mean you, Flare. XD

[BatRobin]

Please forgive the new guy, but can we make requests here, or is that a different thread?

We take requests, go right ahead!

[icastflare!]

Is that an undead paladin avatar?

your only right with the paladin part. this is gausra baenafin the drow . main character in my webcomic. He isnt undead because he has flesh, and emotions, and can jump effectivly

[Lix Lorn]

Aaaah. Now i see the resemblance. XD

[CoffeeIncluded]

Please forgive the new guy, but can we make requests here, or is that a different thread?

Welcome! Here's your free sample of brain bleach!

Yep! Make requests, write requests, sing requests, we do it all here!

[Sereg]

As the others have stated, we do take requests, however, I've got a massive build up that I've promised to do, so unless I suddenly manage to do them at about quadruple my normal speed, it's not going to be me that fulfills it.

[Silverraptor]

Can you Smite Evil with just fists?

My favorite situation was were someone managed to grapple an imp, and then proceeded to use it's body as a weapon while using smite evil with it. The result was the instant death of the imp while the humiliating death of the other devil the group was fighting.

[Debatra]

sing requests

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*clears throat*
(to the tune of Auld Lang Sine)

I've seen this ship-some
Times before,
Though neeever quite eeenough.

My request is Bel-
Kar/Vaarsuuuu-vius
And I hooope it's not too tough.

Belkarrr/Vaaaar-suuuvius.
Belkarrr aaand V.
A showoff-Elan
With a scro-oll gone wrong
An effect, that in a month will leave.

[/singing]

To be more specific than what I can get into verse, I'm thinking that Elan gets his hands on some scroll that he misinterprets the effect of, and tries to show off to Haley. He ends up binding the Party in pairs, based on who was nearest to each other at the time. Suddenly, those paired must remain within a certain proximity of each other.

As far as when this happens in relation to Canon, I'm thinking Elan gets the scroll in the town they're headed to in 698.

[Draconi Redfir]

My favorite situation was were someone managed to grapple an imp, and then proceeded to use it's body as a weapon while using smite evil with it. The result was the instant death of the imp while the humiliating death of the other devil the group was fighting.

nice. i was once playing as a Goblin along side a colossal and a dwarf attacking a hobgoblin fortress. nedless to say i was killed fairly quickly, and in a rage of vengence, my colossal freind (who is some kind of mix between a stone golem and an oger or something) picked up my cold goblin corpse, and hucked it at the nearest hobgoblin he could find.

corpse flys, hobgoblin dies, many laughs are shaired by all. and i get to tell this tale to all my freinds

oh, and later on im revived as a female bugbear. yay for me :P

[Lix Lorn]

I have a better story. Go look at the rp i'm in atm. Luck=bad.

Sounds like a cool idea. XD I think Water-Smurf did some Belkar/V once...

[Tira-chan]

Spoiler

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*clears throat*
(to the tune of Auld Lang Sine)

I've seen this ship-some
Times before,
Though neeever quite eeenough.

My request is Bel-
Kar/Vaarsuuuu-vius
And I hooope it's not too tough.

Belkarrr/Vaaaar-suuuvius.
Belkarrr aaand V.
A showoff-Elan
With a scro-oll gone wrong
An effect, that in a month will leave.

[/singing]

To be more specific than what I can get into verse, I'm thinking that Elan gets his hands on some scroll that he misinterprets the effect of, and tries to show off to Haley. He ends up binding the Party in pairs, based on who was nearest to each other at the time. Suddenly, those paired must remain within a certain proximity of each other.

As far as when this happens in relation to Canon, I'm thinking Elan gets the scroll in the town they're headed to in 698.

Mmm, not bad, and canon, too. You could work in some Roy/Durkon just for added fun, though I would be surprised if Belkar lasted a day in this situation, never mind a month.

Re: My mention of art - I was actually saying I'd like a banner or something for my story, but I feel really, really, really guilty about begging for art. So if someone really does want to make something I'd be very happy, but please don't put yourself at any inconvenience on account of me!

Re: My story - I've actually got about three or so chapters planned out, except for the start of the very next one. So I'm asking you all, who certainly know plenty about writing V. Under what circumstances do you think that she might reveal the whole Familicide fiasco? I can see her feeling guilty about it, especially given the circumstances, but I don't think she'd feel compelled to just share it... Maybe if Belkar started to hint about her adventures on the dark side, Spock questioned her, and she end up angrily/guiltily spilling the whole thing? Does that sound logical in-character?

[Asta Kask]

Elan is great for generating Crack. He can always be relied on to do the stupid thing.