Gettin' Drunk

[Amiel]

It is not for kings, O Lemuel, it is not for kings to drink wine; nor for princes strong drink:
Lest they drink, and forget the law, and pervert the judgment of any of the afflicted.
Give strong drink unto him that is ready to perish, and wine unto those that be of heavy hearts.
Let him drink, and forget his poverty, and remember his misery no more.

An adventurer must do heroic things; they must slay dragons, escort little old ladies from one side of the street to the other, rescue damsels, plant seeds...

Sometimes, there is no better adventure than that that can be had through the inviting waters found at the bottom of a cup; kicking back with friends and enjoying the good life, this is what being an adventurer is all about.

Each stage of drunkenness has its own amusing effects; they are listed below. The limit for alcohol is equal to your Constitution modifier.

Gettin' Drunk
Lonely
Buzzed
Boisterous
Drunk
Pissed
Passed Out
Poisoned
Dead

Lonely; you are a bastion of sobriety, non-drunk even in the face of your friends' antics; you are not affected or effected negatively at this stage.
Buzzed; you are starting to feel the initial effects of drunkenness. You take a -1d2 to Wis.
Boisterous; you become boisterous and reckless. You take -1d2 to Dex, and add the Reckless character trait.
Drunk; you are at the stage where you cannot walk in a straight line. This resolves in the following ways; you take a -1d2 to Dex and Wis. You must save against a sleep effect or suffer the effects of the spell; additionally, you may need to save against a hideous laughter effect or be prone to burst out into song or inappropriate laughter.
Pissed; you are beyond caring what you do or what you may look like. You take a further -1d2 to Dex and Wis and a -1d2 to Cha. You must save against a sleep effect or suffer the effects of the spell. Your movement speed is reduced by 10 feet, and your AC is decreased by -2.
Passed Out; you are passed out in a gutter or sewer somewhere. You may be passed out in the street or in someone's home. There may be random and/of offensive scribbling upon your forehead or person. You are under the following effects; you take a -1d2 to Wis, your Dex has dropped to 0. You may have already puked out any food or lack thereof you may have consumed, taking 1d2 Con damage.
Poisoned; you are suffering the effects of poison. You must make a DC Fort 15 save every round or die.
Dead; you are dead. People may or may not mourn you; it depends on how entertaining you were.

All numbers are additive and cumulative.


Next up will be diabolical beverages

[Yora]

I getting drunk?! Roll the dice and see if I'm getting drunk!!!

[Comet]

Epic stuff. Can't wait for stats on the effects of extraplanar bar crawls

[Lysander]

You need to have some trope specific levels of drunkeness too:

Master - Gain the AC bonus and unarmed damage of a 5th level monk.
Future Amnesiac - Gain +10 on all diplomacy and perform (party instigator) checks. After recovering from drunkeness lose all memories from this period.

[TheYoungKing]

A Fort Save every round for Poisoned? Bit extreme considering how little time a round actually takes up......

[Creed]

I getting drunk?! Roll the dice and see if I'm getting drunk!!!

Fine your getting drunk!

[Corporate M]

This is one of those moments where my bastion of random knowledge comes in handy.

Clear liquors like Vodka do not give you hangovers. They're not germinated like the darker liquors and are moure destilled and "pure". The darker the liquor, the more painful it's going to hurt the next day.

Liquor would be strange to implement in D&D though. I'm sure there's moments of roleplaying where it would comeup. But enough to writedown stats? Mostly drinking is a social outlet and a personal addiction. I can only immagine that in-game terms, liquor actually has BENEFITS to will saves (but not wisdom as a whole) and charisma. (Well... when you're buzzed, not when you're puking all over the floor drunk)

Something like...

Vodka:
Fortitude DC 19
(Will Save when not an alchaholic: 17 Will save when an alchaholic: 5)
Buzz Effect: You gain a bonus will save every round to overcome [fear] effects. You take 2 wisdom damage.
Drunk Effect: You take 2 strength damage this shot, and every shot previously within the last 24 hours.
Alchahol Poisening: 1d8

The buzz effect happens when you fail once. If you fail your fort check again next shot, you go into the drunk effect state. The alchahol poisenong is the number of "damage" you take per shot. When your alchahol poisenong damage exceeds your constitution score, you have to make a fortitude save or immideatly die equal to the amount of alchahol poisening damage. This is a bit unrealistic, as supposedly an "average" person at 10 con would only be able to without risk, take two shots before knocking on death's door. But as I said, this is difficult to stat. The will save is an arbitary measurement I added to resist the urge to take another shot or something based off social interaction, mood, and whether or not you crave booze... I don't see many alchaholics using vodka to fuel their habit. Mostly because it's expensive and very fine. It's actually more tempting for the casual drinker. Maybe not quite THAT tempting... But I reitorate that this is horrible trying to stat...


Hangovers would basically make you sickened or nauseated, and would double or triple sonic damage done to you. The other problem I have with this, is I know there's going to be a player thinking he can kill the big bad by picking up his bar tab and buying him several shots.

[Amiel]

Thanks for the comments, all!

A Fort Save every round for Poisoned? Bit extreme considering how little time a round actually takes up......

Alcohol is a rather deadly poison; by that stage, you would have already consumed enough to deal irreparable damage to your liver. Would reducing the save to every second round mitigate this concern?

Looking good, Corporate M.

[Ashtagon]

I'd start giving penalty to Reflex saves very early on. There's a reason why anti-drink-driving campaigns are so common.

There should probably be penalties to Drive/Pilot skills (if in a modern campaign), as well as ranged weapons (alcohol makes you shoot at tax collectors and miss).

I'd also keep all ability score penalties at even numbers, in order to ensure they are always meaningful.

Alcohol poisoning is probably better treated in D&D terms as a disease. The realistic effect is that pretty much nothing happens for about 2-3 days while your liver packs up, except you'd feel more tired than normal. Next day, you're dead.

[Amiel]

Beer Cube
Huge Ooze
Hit Dice: 14d10+112 (189 hp)
Initiative: -5
Speed: 30 ft. (6 squares)
Armor Class: 3 (-2 size, -5 Dex), touch 3, flat-footed 3
Base Attack/Grapple: +10/+22
Attack: Slam +12 melee (2d6+6 plus 2d6 acid)
Full Attack: Slam +12 melee (2d6+6 plus 2d6 acid)
Space/Reach: 15 ft./10 ft.
Special Attacks: Acid, addictive, constrict 2d6+4 plus 2d6 acid, gettin' drunk, improved grab, paralysis
Special Qualities: Blindsight 60 ft., division, ooze traits
Saves: Fort +12, Ref -1, Will -1
Abilities: Str 19, Dex 1, Con 26, Int Ø, Wis 1, Cha 1
Skills: —
Feats: —
Environment: Any, usually at parties
Organization: Solitary
Challenge Rating: 11
Treasure: Beer
Alignment: Always neutral
Advancement: 14-28 HD (Huge); 29-42 HD (Gargantuan)
Level Adjustment: —

With the pleasing scent of hops and barley, these ooze entrap the unwary and foolish in deception and lies. Ostensibly the drunken product of some arcane folly, these ooze can't talk and the suspected instigator isn't talking.
The beer cube fizzes and pops with such inviting and smooth deliciousness and with such richness of colour and flavour, that it leaves all who behold it drooling, slobbering messes; their only thought to partake of this divine beverage before them.
Many have gone to their demise by attempting to wrassle with this cube.

Combat

Acid (Ex): The beer cube secretes a digestive enzyme and yeast that dissolves organic material and metal quickly, but does not affect stone. Any melee hit or constrict attack deals acid damage, and the opponent's armor and clothing dissolve and become useless immediately unless they succeed on DC 25 Reflex saves. A metal or wooden weapon that strikes a beer cube also dissolves immediately unless it succeeds on a DC 25 Reflex save. The save DCs are Constitution-based.

The beer cube's acidic touch deals 25 points of damage per round to wooden or metal objects, but the ooze must remain in contact with the object for 1 full round to deal this damage.

Addictive (Ex): The beer cube forces a near unbreakable addiction on opponents. Those who behold the beer cube are nearly always ensnared by its visual appeal. This is exactly as the suggestion spell (caster level 14th), with the suggested course of action to immediately partake of the beer cube's golden goodness. Opponents must succeed against a Will save DC 25 to resist. A creature that successfully saves cannot be affected again by the same beer cube for 24 hours. The save DC is Constitution-based.

Constrict (Ex): A beer cube deals automatic slam and acid damage with a successful grapple check. The opponent's clothing and armor take a -4 penalty on Reflex saves against the acid.

Division (Ex): Slashing and piercing weapons deal no damage to a beer cube. Instead the creature splits into two identical beer cubes, each with half of the original's current hit points (round down). A beer cube with 10 hit points or less cannot be further split and dies if reduced to 0 hit points.

Gettin' Drunk (Ex): Beer cubes can radiate a heady, intoxicating scent within a 10 foot-radius. Affected creatures must succeed on a DC 25 Will save or be affected as though by buzzed. A creature that successfully saves cannot be affected again by the same beer cube's aura for 24 hours. The save DC is Constitution-based.

Although it moves slowly, a beer cube can simply mow down Huge or smaller creatures as a standard action. It cannot make a slam attack during a round in which it engulfs. The beer cube merely has to move over the opponents, affecting as many as it can cover. Opponents can make opportunity attacks against the cube, but if they do so they are not entitled to a saving throw. Those who do not attempt attacks of opportunity must succeed on a DC 21 Reflex save or be engulfed; on a success, they are pushed back or aside (opponent's choice) as the cube moves forward. Engulfed creatures are subject to the cube's paralysis and acid, and are considered to be grappled and trapped within its body. The save DC is Strength-based.

Each round immersion within the beer cube's body forces those engulfed to gradually progress through each gettin' drunk stage.

Improved Grab (Ex): To use this ability, a beer cube must hit with its slam attack. It can then attempt to start a grapple as a free action without provoking an attack of opportunity. If it wins the grapple check, it establishes a hold and can constrict.

Paralysis (Ex): A beer cube secretes an anesthetizing liquid. A target hit by a cube's melee or engulf attack must succeed on a DC 25 Fortitude save or be paralyzed for 3d6 rounds, as the beer cube shoves at least a litre of alcohol into the opponent's body. The cube can automatically engulf a paralyzed opponent. The save DC is Constitution-based.

[Daremonai]

This is one of those moments where my bastion of random knowledge comes in handy.

Clear liquors like Vodka do not give you hangovers. They're not germinated like the darker liquors and are moure destilled and "pure". The darker the liquor, the more painful it's going to hurt the next day.

Really? I'd always put the hangover down to the synthesis of aldehyde in your brain as you metabolised the ethanol (which is the alcohol in commonly available drinks). As a side note, meths (methanol) is metabolised into formaldehyde, which is both toxic and carcinogenic - there's a reason why folk generally don't drink it.

Back on topic, shouldn't there be some kind of bonus for pain resistance as you get more drunk? Probably from Drunk onwards, and increasing as you approach becoming paralytic.

[Ravens_Wing]

Spoiler

Show

Beer Cube
Huge Ooze
Hit Dice: 14d10+112 (189 hp)
Initiative: -5
Speed: 30 ft. (6 squares)
Armor Class: 3 (-2 size, -5 Dex), touch 3, flat-footed 3
Base Attack/Grapple: +10/+22
Attack: Slam +12 melee (2d6+6 plus 2d6 acid)
Full Attack: Slam +12 melee (2d6+6 plus 2d6 acid)
Space/Reach: 15 ft./10 ft.
Special Attacks: Acid, addictive, constrict 2d6+4 plus 2d6 acid, gettin' drunk, improved grab, paralysis
Special Qualities: Blindsight 60 ft., division, ooze traits
Saves: Fort +12, Ref -1, Will -1
Abilities: Str 19, Dex 1, Con 26, Int Ø, Wis 1, Cha 1
Skills: —
Feats: —
Environment: Any, usually at parties
Organization: Solitary
Challenge Rating: 11
Treasure: Beer
Alignment: Always neutral
Advancement: 14-28 HD (Huge); 29-42 HD (Gargantuan)
Level Adjustment: —

With the pleasing scent of hops and barley, these ooze entrap the unwary and foolish in deception and lies. Ostensibly the drunken product of some arcane folly, these ooze can't talk and the suspected instigator isn't talking.
The beer cube fizzes and pops with such inviting and smooth deliciousness and with such richness of colour and flavour, that it leaves all who behold it drooling, slobbering messes; their only thought to partake of this divine beverage before them.
Many have gone to their demise by attempting to wrassle with this cube.

Combat

Acid (Ex): The beer cube secretes a digestive enzyme and yeast that dissolves organic material and metal quickly, but does not affect stone. Any melee hit or constrict attack deals acid damage, and the opponent's armor and clothing dissolve and become useless immediately unless they succeed on DC 25 Reflex saves. A metal or wooden weapon that strikes a beer cube also dissolves immediately unless it succeeds on a DC 25 Reflex save. The save DCs are Constitution-based.

The beer cube's acidic touch deals 25 points of damage per round to wooden or metal objects, but the ooze must remain in contact with the object for 1 full round to deal this damage.

Addictive (Ex): The beer cube forces a near unbreakable addiction on opponents. Those who behold the beer cube are nearly always ensnared by its visual appeal. This is exactly as the suggestion spell (caster level 14th), with the suggested course of action to immediately partake of the beer cube's golden goodness. Opponents must succeed against a Will save DC 25 to resist. A creature that successfully saves cannot be affected again by the same beer cube for 24 hours. The save DC is Constitution-based.

Constrict (Ex): A beer cube deals automatic slam and acid damage with a successful grapple check. The opponent's clothing and armor take a -4 penalty on Reflex saves against the acid.

Division (Ex): Slashing and piercing weapons deal no damage to a beer cube. Instead the creature splits into two identical beer cubes, each with half of the original's current hit points (round down). A beer cube with 10 hit points or less cannot be further split and dies if reduced to 0 hit points.

Gettin' Drunk (Ex): Beer cubes can radiate a heady, intoxicating scent within a 10 foot-radius. Affected creatures must succeed on a DC 25 Will save or be affected as though by buzzed. A creature that successfully saves cannot be affected again by the same beer cube's aura for 24 hours. The save DC is Constitution-based.

Although it moves slowly, a beer cube can simply mow down Huge or smaller creatures as a standard action. It cannot make a slam attack during a round in which it engulfs. The beer cube merely has to move over the opponents, affecting as many as it can cover. Opponents can make opportunity attacks against the cube, but if they do so they are not entitled to a saving throw. Those who do not attempt attacks of opportunity must succeed on a DC 21 Reflex save or be engulfed; on a success, they are pushed back or aside (opponent's choice) as the cube moves forward. Engulfed creatures are subject to the cube's paralysis and acid, and are considered to be grappled and trapped within its body. The save DC is Strength-based.

Each round immersion within the beer cube's body forces those engulfed to gradually progress through each gettin' drunk stage.

Improved Grab (Ex): To use this ability, a beer cube must hit with its slam attack. It can then attempt to start a grapple as a free action without provoking an attack of opportunity. If it wins the grapple check, it establishes a hold and can constrict.

Paralysis (Ex): A beer cube secretes an anesthetizing liquid. A target hit by a cube's melee or engulf attack must succeed on a DC 25 Fortitude save or be paralyzed for 3d6 rounds, as the beer cube shoves at least a litre of alcohol into the opponent's body. The cube can automatically engulf a paralyzed opponent. The save DC is Constitution-based.

You do understand that this critter would cause the Extinction of the ENTIRE Dwarven Race don't you?

[Jota]

You do understand that the dwarven race would cause the extinction of this critter, don't you?

Fixed it for you.

[Fable Wright]

Vodka:
Fortitude DC 19
(Will Save when not an alchaholic: 17 Will save when an alchaholic: 5)
Buzz Effect: You gain a bonus will save every round to overcome [fear] effects. You take 2 wisdom damage.
Drunk Effect: You take 2 strength damage this shot, and every shot previously within the last 24 hours.
Alchahol Poisening: 1d8

The buzz effect happens when you fail once. If you fail your fort check again next shot, you go into the drunk effect state. The alchahol poisenong is the number of "damage" you take per shot. When your alchahol poisenong damage exceeds your constitution score, you have to make a fortitude save or immideatly die equal to the amount of alchahol poisening damage. This is a bit unrealistic, as supposedly an "average" person at 10 con would only be able to without risk, take two shots before knocking on death's door. But as I said, this is difficult to stat. The will save is an arbitary measurement I added to resist the urge to take another shot or something based off social interaction, mood, and whether or not you crave booze... I don't see many alchaholics using vodka to fuel their habit. Mostly because it's expensive and very fine. It's actually more tempting for the casual drinker. Maybe not quite THAT tempting... But I reitorate that this is horrible trying to stat...

This is kind of off topic, but could anyone make the stats of a dwarvish alcoholic drink? I only ask because once my party's halfling rogue tried to out-drink the party's dwarven barbarian, and I was just curious how messed up his stats would be while he was lying passed out on the floor.

[Amiel]

Ashtagon and Daremonai, thank you for those suggestions, it's definitely food for thought. I'll try to integrate some of your suggestions within the rules.
Ash, when you talk about penalties being at even numbers, do you mean that the numerical value should always be a static decrease? (-2 penalty throughout to Wis, for example), and increase them accordingly (ie, -2 becomes -4 and so on) or am I misunderstanding?

You do understand that this critter would cause the Extinction of the ENTIRE Dwarven Race don't you?

I imagine with their Fort saves, at least they would die happy

This is kind of off topic, but could anyone make the stats of a dwarvish alcoholic drink? I only ask because once my party's halfling rogue tried to out-drink the party's dwarven barbarian, and I was just curious how messed up his stats would be while he was lying passed out on the floor.

In terms of comparative effect, are elven beverages stronger than dwarven ones? or is there really no comparison as the vapidity of elven alcoholic drinks cannot hope to compare with the blindness inducing dwarven liquors?

[Ashtagon]

Ashtagon and Daremonai, thank you for those suggestions, it's definitely food for thought. I'll try to integrate some of your suggestions within the rules.
Ash, when you talk about penalties being at even numbers, do you mean that the numerical value should always be a static decrease? (-2 penalty throughout to Wis, for example), and increase them accordingly (ie, -2 becomes -4 and so on) or am I misunderstanding?

Yes, that's exactly what I mean. That comment does not apply to penalties directly to saves, AC, attack, or skill rolls; just those that go to ability scores.

Penalties (and bonuses, more generally speaking) to ability scores should either be larger amounts determined by die rolls (such as many poisons), or else should be in even numbers, to ensure that the actual numerical modifier is always meaningful; losing one point of Str can either cause a penalty or not, depending on what Str was before. With a 1d2 ability point loss, that would cause significant RP differences between two characters whose scores were one point apart.

[Ravens_Wing]

Fixed it for you.

Meh. Six of one, half a dozen of the other.

[Lateral]

How many drinks does it take to go up a stage of drunkenness? Also what happened to "diabolic beverages"?

[Amiel]

Should I include a Fort save for each stage? As you go over how many drinks your body is able to process (the alcohol limit), you need to save against a Fort DC; failure means that you are affected by whatever effect is at any given stage. Each progression across the stages applies a +2 to the Fort DC.

I'm thinking of starting everything off (buzzed) at Fort DC 15. Thoughts?


Also, I don't know if this has already been mentioned, but I'd like drunkenness to include a bonus to Con; so, this should increase one's Fort, hp, and anything else tied to Con. Thoughts?

Here is the first of many beverages to come.

[The Dark Fiddler]

Also, I don't know if this has already been mentioned, but I'd like drunkenness to include a bonus to Con; so, this should increase one's Fort, hp, and anything else tied to Con. Thoughts?

I really can't see ingesting a poison making you better able to resist other poisons. And I don't see being drunk boosting your Concentration check either/

I'd say maybe some temp. HP as though the character's CON score had increased.