This isn't your Dad's Childhood! This is Let's Play: Pokemon: Shiny Gold: Hard Mode!

[doliest]

I vote for Invincible the Slowpoke.

[Kobold-Bard]

R.I.P
Algernon the Pikachu

Wish I had more to say
but you never really did anything

....Nice cheeks

---------------------------------------
I vote for Mercutio because Growlithe are awesome and you need a fire type (coz everyone needs a fire type).

[Destro_Yersul]

if you can get a moonstone, or something, Umbreon is a good solid choice for a Dark type.

[Divayth Fyr]

I'd say level Eevee up to get Bite and then use a moonstone (I can't remember how many of them were in SG and where...)

[Adumbration]

You've got a new reader, Raistlin! That is, me. Very nice work, I'm looking forward to future updates.

[Blue Ghost]

But Eevee doesn't evolve with Sun or Moon Stones. Unless it's different in the hack?

@V: I see.

[Shades of Gray]

In this hack any pokeyman that evolves at a certain time instead uses evolutionary stones.

Any pokeyman that needs to be traded to evolve instead evolves at a certain level.

[Dubious Pie]

I say you use a Fire Stone on Caspian. Flareon is made of win.
I vote Caspian.

[Penguinator]

I say you use a Fire Stone on Caspian. Flareon is made of win.

I take it you're not a power player.

[Raistlin1040]

You've got a new reader, Raistlin! That is, me. Very nice work, I'm looking forward to future updates.

Yay! Readers!

Okay guys, I'm going to lay this out for you. Do not bet on evolutionary stones. Gold and Silver were the stingiest by far about them, and this hack is even worse. I've been reading a walkthrough some other guys played so I can tailor the narrative and not screw up (it would've been bad if Morty hadn't been in the game for whatever reason, for example). Here's what I've seen in their walkthrough, about stones. I got a Sun Stone from the Bug Catching Contest. After beating Clair, I go into the Dragon's Den and fight three guys. The order I fight them determines if I get a Water, Thunder, or Fire Stone. At the Pokemon League beginning, there is a Moonstone. That's it.

I don't know how to hack it in, and while I probably could, I would rather not.

[Destro_Yersul]

Good lord, that's terrible. Why couldn't he have just hacked Goldenrod to sell the damn things, after a certain point was reached?

[The Shoveler]

Exactly! He hacked the Punch trio into TMs that were sold there, why can't he hack in the stones? They were rare enough in the actual games, why make them rarer?

[Deme]

Yay! Readers!

Okay guys, I'm going to lay this out for you. Do not bet on evolutionary stones. Gold and Silver were the stingiest by far about them, and this hack is even worse. I've been reading a walkthrough some other guys played so I can tailor the narrative and not screw up (it would've been bad if Morty hadn't been in the game for whatever reason, for example). Here's what I've seen in their walkthrough, about stones. I got a Sun Stone from the Bug Catching Contest. After beating Clair, I go into the Dragon's Den and fight three guys. The order I fight them determines if I get a Water, Thunder, or Fire Stone. At the Pokemon League beginning, there is a Moonstone. That's it.

I don't know how to hack it in, and while I probably could, I would rather not.

In which case, go with Caspian to evolve into Espeon.

[VanBuren]

Nah, go with Koffing. He's toxic.

[The Shoveler]

Wait, Magnemite isn't as good as I thought it would be, what with a Fighting and Steel gym coming up. I say go with Caspian, making him an Espeon. Every good team needs a Psychic type, in my opinion.

[Raistlin1040]

That is a large majority for Caspian. I'll put Gates into the Day Care center in case I lose someone else along the way.

[Dubious Pie]

I take it you're not a power player.

I was, I just have not played since Blue, where it had the highest Special Attack of any non-legendary Fire-type.

[Penguinator]

Well, Flareon fell into uselessness by the fourth gen, I'm not sure how it was in second and third. Even so, Raistlin's explanation of the lack of stones makes it kind of a moot point.

[Raistlin1040]

Chapter 19

Spoiler

Show

I did some thinking before I tried to get to Cianwood again, and I decided that I was going to need more reliable fall-backs in case I lost some one else again. Invincible, contrary to her name, was not so, and I needed someone else training up.

And of course there's another egg. Apparently De Sade just can't keep his...slime off of her.

Back to the box with you!...Huh. Incoming phone call.

Hello?
"Yeah, Janick? It's your "mother". Apparently you're doing better than I thought. Elm keeps coming over and talking about your accomplishments. 4 Gym badges now, right?"
Yeah. Don't worry, I've got your share tucked away for when we're all finished.
"Great. Well look, I've been doing some research about Pokemon while I'm here, and I discovered something. People pay a lot to breeders for newborns. Elm has been keeping track of what you have with that Pokedex thing, and I stole a look, and crunched some numbers. Most of the ones you have are available in the wild pretty easily, so they're only worth a few hundred each."
What is this about, then? I'm not selling the ones I have, they're necessary for the plan.
"No, I'm not suggesting that. However, people pay thousands for 'famous children'. If you get famous, and beat the rest of the Gyms, you won't even have to fight the champion. People will pay thousands for the babies of your Pokemon."
Huh. I didn't think about that. That's a good idea.
"I know. I've got to go, Elm is coming over for lunch."


Alright, got some eggs. Let's go hatch them!

I heard that they hatch faster if you move around a lot.

This city is surprisingly bike friendly.

It's a pretty nice path, too.

Huh. It's been an hour, why is this taking so long?

*pant* Can't be much longer now...

Oh my god...I think I just...collapsed a lung...

Okay, screw this. I'll do it later.

Eggs, get in the box, Gates, go with the nice lady, and everyone else, let's get the hell out of here.

Huh, I haven't really been keeping track of how much I've been making, but 54 thousand is a very nice payoff for a few weeks of work. Pokemon Training for money is a little like gambling. You've got to invest a bit to get any return, but if you wait long enough...pay day!

Where did I put that TM...Caspian! Stay away from that gemstone! That thing is worth more to me than any of you! Hey! HEY!

Dammit.

That rock looked expensive.

At least I can still take the Cianwood Gym leader for all he's worth.

Got a crab. Wee.

At least now Jasmine has no excuse not to battle me.

There is a twelve year old blocking my way into the Gym. Sigh.

Obviously. Or do you not see my team of six murderous war machines?

...What? THAT IS NOT ALLOWED! THAT IS TAUROS CRAP!

I did not surf across the ocean to get some stupid medicine for a dumb animal! I came here to fight the Cianwood Gym Leader!

Don't insult me, kid. I'm not in the mood.

Murderface, take care of this.

That's what I thought.

The brat guarding your door? Yeah. I'm sorry about her too.

Great. Let's get to fighting.

That would be what I just said, yes.

If you say so.


You threw a rock. Nice job. But what about your Pokemon?

Let's get this over with.
[See Bonus Chapter 6]
That was easy.

No wait, I don't want to know your name! If you tell me your name, it means you're going to come after me again sometime and I'll have to kick you ass and it'll be really annoying...Damn. She left.

[Penguinator]

Huh. What's up with the eggs?

[Raistlin1040]

They're in the box. Usually I speed-hatch with a Magmar, on a super fast bike. The bike is slower in this game than in SoulSilver and Pearl, and I don't have a Flame Body Pokemon. I started to hatch them, and after they didn't hatch in like two minutes, I got bored. Or they might be a plot point. Either way.

[Deme]

Janick has crabs. teehee.
...
Also, I like this excuse for Janick to mess around with eggs if he wants to, even if he gets bored later.

[Raistlin1040]

Bonus Chapter 6

Spoiler

Show

Alright kid, show me what you've got!
Funny. I was about to tell you the same thing.
Don't get arrogant, boy. Go, Primeape!
Go Caspian. Might as well make yourself useful. Try not to get yourself killed.
---Pokemon Speech--
Hua-ha! I'm ready if you are!
No time for introductions? A pity, and I had such a clever first line.
Huh?
Well, you see, my name is Caspian, sAND I am pleased to make your acquaintance.
Agh, my eyes!
Yes, I know I'm wittier than that, but I thought a pun would appeal to a fighter like yourself. Very simple.
Karate Chop! Come here you little-
Monkey? Because in that case, we'd be talking about you, my friend. Re-using a pun is even less humorous than using it in the first place, so in lieu of a proper setup, I'll let the sand be its own joke.
Agh! You dishonorable pest! I'll chop you in two!
Dishonorable? I don't think that's a fair word. Honor is for duels, my friend, and this is a fight. Fights are about winning, and I'm a bit of a rake in that respect. I've no problem fighting a bit dirty if that's what it takes. Consider it a compliment.
RUHHHH!
Very close, so close. Just a little to the left next time and you've got me. Hey, I've got a riddle for you. What has two fists, bad eyes, and a charging Espeon about to headbutt it in the stomach?
AHHHHH!
Missed again. And that's not very sporting of you. I'm sure you have a better guess than that. The answer, by the way, was you.
Ugh...
Come on. I know you're a bit weak and dizzy, but you'll have to put up more of a fight than that. Try to block this, alright?
Ugh...You...rat.
I'll have you know that I'm some kind of dog/cat/psychic hybrid. Oh by the way, you should probably tap out so that your trainer knows you're finished.
I'm not...finished...
Really? Huh, thought you were. My apologies. Quick Attack.
I'm not going down that easily, punk!
Hm. Could've sworn you were about to go down.
Super Potion.
Ah. Handy. Doesn't change a thing, I'm afraid. Headbutt!
Karate Chop!
Yep, keep flailing like that, you're bound to hit something eventually. By the way, here's another riddle. What has a pig nose and is about to be knocked unconscious?
You, when I'm done with you.
Hey, clever. Headbutt!
Critical Hit!
Foe Primeape fainted!
But no, it's still you.
---Pokemon Speech---
Your Espeon is pretty tough, I'll give you that, but Primeape isn't my strongest fighter. Go, Poliwrath!
---Pokemon Speech---
I'm here to win!
Nice entrance. Very threatening, although I generally do something a bit more...theatrical? By the way, you've got something in your eye.
Huh?
Sand-Attack.
Dirty fighting? Well two can play at that game! Hypnosis!
Of course two can play. It's just that only one can win. By the way, you're facing the wrong direction.
Where did you go?
Right here, mate. Smile big. Sand-Attack!
Hypnosis!
I'm starting to think this gym is made up of ineffective one-shot wonders. Headbutt.
You don't know about my best trick. I don't need to see you to hit you.
Really? I was going to chalk inability to hit me up to partial blindness, but if you want it to be your gross incompetance, that's fine too.
Mind Reader!
Huh. Weird, I can hear you in my head. Headbutt!
Mind Reader!
Maybe if I hit you hard enough, I'll hear myself in your head.
Mind Reader!
What exactly does that move even DO?
It allows me to penetrate your thoughts and determine exactly where you are, and what you're going to do. Then I can just act without needing to see where you are.
Then why am I still mostly unharmed?
The move requires total focus to maintain. If I stop concentrating for even a second, I will lose my lock on your position.
So basically, you know where I am, but as soon as you try to hit me, you'll miss? Sounds like a brilliant way to do combat. Headbutt!
Critical Hit!
Foe Poliwrath fainted!
Please, hold your applause, ladies and gentlemen.
---Pokemon Speech---
That Espeon was a ferocious fighter! Congratulations! Here is the Stormbadge and a TM containing Dynamic Punch! You've earned them!
Yeah, whatever. I'm out.

[Cespenar]

That's a witty cat.

[Raistlin1040]

/Dog/Psychic. He said it himself, he's sort of a rake.

[Cespenar]

I don't see any dogness, and Psychic isn't an animal type, so I'm sticking with cat.

[onasuma]

I vote for slowpoke!

[Raistlin1040]

Ha. I see what you did there.

[onasuma]

I missed my actualy vote, just to do that.

[Raistlin1040]

I can respect and admire that kind of dedication.