New OOTS products from CafePress
New OOTS t-shirts, ornaments, mugs, bags, and more
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 30 of 43
  1. - Top - End - #1
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Mystic Muse's Avatar

    Join Date
    Mar 2009

    Default An annoying situation

    Suppose somebody you didn't really know that much Called your parents one day. They're hosting a big party and they want your parents to come and add "Bring the kids too" Instead of going to your biweekly* activity your parents say you should go to this party. You know that the host isn't going to notice whether or not you're there and that going will make you miserable. Not only because you're missing one of your favorite activities but because you have to dress up in uncomfortable clothes, to go to a party you don't care about. Not only that but you won't have anybody to hang out with because everybody there prefers hanging out with your siblings. However, even if you were to stay home you couldn't go to your activity because you can't drive.

    Now, under these circumstances, Is there any reason you shouldn't simply stay home and IM people or play Nintendo? I ask because I'm in a similar situation. And no, I can't just text people since I don't own a cell phone.
    Last edited by Mystic Muse; 2010-07-14 at 02:55 AM.

  2. - Top - End - #2
    Banned
     
    Milskidasith's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: A hypothetical situation

    This problem doesn't seem hypothetical at all.

    Anyway, solution #1 is to get a cell phone so you can ask friends to a ride to your... whatever event.

    Solution #2 is to just go and deal with it, try to make friends, and not intentionally make yourself miserable before you go there. Even things that you "know" are going to be awful can be enjoyable if you don't ruin your day by getting miserable for going before you even go.

  3. - Top - End - #3
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Mystic Muse's Avatar

    Join Date
    Mar 2009

    Default Re: A hypothetical situation

    Quote Originally Posted by Milskidasith View Post
    This problem doesn't seem hypothetical at all.
    .
    Well, the situation I'm in is similar but not quite the same. Although I guess the method of invitation was changed and that's about it.

    EDIT: the situation isn't very hypothetical, you're right. I'll change the title.

    I'd ask for one of my friends to drive me but I can't think of any of my friends who can drive, and my parents wouldn't appreciate it if somebody they didn't know very well drove me. (Such as my friends parents, other people who go to the activity.)
    Last edited by Mystic Muse; 2010-07-14 at 02:55 AM.

  4. - Top - End - #4
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    IonDragon's Avatar

    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Location
    Central California, USA
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: A hypothetical situation

    Or bring your laptop, gameboy (dating myself), or whatever and see if you can snag wifi from there. Or a book. Books are great because they never run out of batteries or loose signal.

    In response to your question, yes. The reason you shouldn't is (presumably) the reason your asking this question. I imagine there's pressure of some sort from the father/mothership.

    I don't know how old you are, but if you're over... say 16 or so bailing is completely an option. Will there be fallout over it? Probably. Will it be worth it? Probably.

    Just using my memories of that age as a base line. Although, I just found out today that I made a livejournal years ago that was... well... not representative of how I remember that age, to put it softly. (14, not 16 though. Because that wasn't clear)
    My games:
    Have you ever wondered How to Succeed in Evil?

    Thanks licoot for the awesome Pip avatar!

  5. - Top - End - #5
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Mystic Muse's Avatar

    Join Date
    Mar 2009

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    Actually, I'm Seventeen. I'm just a horrible procrastinator and haven't gotten my license yet.

    ....I'm working on it and I'm taking the test in a couple of days.

    EDIT: I'm going to bed. I'll respond tomorrow.
    Last edited by Mystic Muse; 2010-07-14 at 03:26 AM.

  6. - Top - End - #6
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    IonDragon's Avatar

    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Location
    Central California, USA
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    I didn't get my license until I was 18. I was driving at 17, and moved out that year. But I'm a baaaaad boy

    I don't recommend doing that, on either count. Just say you don't want to go, you've already made plans. I don't know enough of the situation to give better advice than 'you should do what you want, probably'. Personally, I'd say I just didn't want to go. /nod. Sleep time, a couple hours late...
    My games:
    Have you ever wondered How to Succeed in Evil?

    Thanks licoot for the awesome Pip avatar!

  7. - Top - End - #7
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    DruidGuy

    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    Oz county
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    Think of it this way: eventually you're going to find that special someone and maybe get married. And you're going to have mandatory days where you hang out with people you really don't want to spend time with, at the cost of not being able to do something you'd rather do. Consider it a duty to your family to attend the function, and suck it up. You won't gain any points for going, but you will surely LOSE points for not going, so it's really up to you if you can afford that hit.
    I used to live in a world of terrible beauty, and then the beauty left.
    Dioxazine purple.

  8. - Top - End - #8
    Orc in the Playground
    Join Date
    Dec 2008

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    I'd say just suck it up and go. An evening of forced interaction won't kill you. Sometimes you do stuff you hate to keep people happy. That's life.

  9. - Top - End - #9
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    The Succubus's Avatar

    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    UK
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    Quote Originally Posted by Liffguard View Post
    An evening of forced interaction won't kill you.
    Unless its with a mass murderer. Or a pit of scorpions. Then it probably will.

  10. - Top - End - #10
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Mystic Muse's Avatar

    Join Date
    Mar 2009

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    Quote Originally Posted by Winter_Wolf View Post
    Eventually you're going to find that special someone and maybe get married.
    This is by no means a guarantee. I don't even know anybody I'd want to go out with right now. Which, granted, doesn't mean it won't happen later, but I don't like my chances of that happening any time soon.
    Last edited by Mystic Muse; 2010-07-14 at 05:57 PM.

  11. - Top - End - #11
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Thajocoth's Avatar

    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    Austin TX
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    Bicycle. It's like a car, but with only half the wheels and no engine!
    Avatar by me. It's Incendius Darkscale, a Good Dragonborn Dragon Sorcerer, Demonskin Adept, Prince of Hell, worshiper of the Platinum Dragon (Bahamut), specializing in Fire and Lightning, wielding a staff in each hand.

  12. - Top - End - #12
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Mystic Muse's Avatar

    Join Date
    Mar 2009

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    Quote Originally Posted by Thajocoth View Post
    Bicycle. It's like a car, but with only half the wheels and no engine!
    I would, but There's several busy roads I'd have to cross and a bridge. As in, the kind cars go across, not one you just walk across.

    I could theoretically carry my bike across it and try and walk on the stone sides but if anything goes wrong? No more Kyuubi.

  13. - Top - End - #13
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    KenderWizard's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Location
    Dublin, Ireland
    Gender
    Female

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    The chances of something unexpectedly good happening are much better if you go out and make an effort to talk to people than if you stay home!

  14. - Top - End - #14
    Ogre in the Playground
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    A Fine Shanty Town
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    Quote Originally Posted by KenderWizard View Post
    The chances of something unexpectedly good happening are much better if you go out and make an effort to talk to people than if you stay home!
    Eh, I dunno if that really applies. I'm pretty sure I know this kind of party and the forced everything sounds fairly painful. Maybe that's just because I've always been pretty anti-social, but that doesn't make an awkward situation any less awkward.

    I'd probably recommend going as well, but I'd definitely second the gameboy/book/what have you. Always have a plan b when getting dragged into any large scale gathering where you don't know/are unsure about the people. Always.
    Last edited by Klose_the_Sith; 2010-07-14 at 06:17 PM.
    *Splendid Goatatar by that cool kid Serpentine
    "Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world"

  15. - Top - End - #15
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    KenderWizard's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Location
    Dublin, Ireland
    Gender
    Female

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    Quote Originally Posted by Klose_the_Sith View Post
    Eh, I dunno if that really applies. I'm pretty sure I know this kind of party and the forced everything sounds fairly painful. Maybe that's just because I've always been pretty anti-social, but that doesn't make an awkward situation any less awkward.
    You never know what's going to happen when you're out in a new situation, though, and even if you've been to similar parties before, it's still a new one, with probably some different guests and stuff. I know there have been times when I really didn't want to go to some stupid party of my parents' friends, but at one such party my mother dragged me over to talk to the other girl my age, and now she's still a close friend of mine, even though that was a good 6 years ago. I went to some pretty boring ones too, but they only last a couple of hours, and there's usually someone to talk to about [I]something[/].

    And going with an open mind for who you might meet doesn't prevent you from also packing a book or gameboy too!

  16. - Top - End - #16
    Ogre in the Playground
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    A Fine Shanty Town
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    Quote Originally Posted by KenderWizard View Post
    You never know what's going to happen when you're out in a new situation, though, and even if you've been to similar parties before, it's still a new one, with probably some different guests and stuff. I know there have been times when I really didn't want to go to some stupid party of my parents' friends, but at one such party my mother dragged me over to talk to the other girl my age, and now she's still a close friend of mine, even though that was a good 6 years ago. I went to some pretty boring ones too, but they only last a couple of hours, and there's usually someone to talk to about [I]something[/].

    And going with an open mind for who you might meet doesn't prevent you from also packing a book or gameboy too!
    Well I've been to every event that I've been invited too under this spectrum and I've regretted it every single time. It's always been the same damn thing and I can never talk to strangers under pressure anyway ...

    Although if you recall I still recommended going, just having a plan b.

    Now get thine damn optimism hence
    *Splendid Goatatar by that cool kid Serpentine
    "Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world"

  17. - Top - End - #17
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    mucat's Avatar

    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    Quote Originally Posted by Kyuubi View Post
    I would, but There's several busy roads I'd have to cross and a bridge. As in, the kind cars go across, not one you just walk across.

    I could theoretically carry my bike across it and try and walk on the stone sides but if anything goes wrong? No more Kyuubi.
    In most countries, including the U.S. if that's where you are, there is no such thing as a destination that can be reached by car but not by bicycle. (Well, there is probably one somewhere. But the number of times I have been told by locals, "you can't get there on a bike" numbers in the dozens or hundreds. The number of times it was even vaguely true holds steady at zero.)

    Now, if your original plans take place 60 miles from home, the amount of time it takes you to get there by bike may make it less than worthwhile. But if you want to go, and it's a reasonable distance, then just make sure you've got good lights and the bike is in good repair, and go.

  18. - Top - End - #18
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Mystic Muse's Avatar

    Join Date
    Mar 2009

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    Yes, I am in the US. This isn't so much a "Not reachable by bicycle" situation as "Unsafe to go by bicycle" situation. Plus my parents would be rather mad.

  19. - Top - End - #19
    Ogre in the Playground
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    A Fine Shanty Town
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    Quote Originally Posted by Kyuubi View Post
    Yes, I am in the US. This isn't so much a "Not reachable by bicycle" situation as "Unsafe to go by bicycle" situation. Plus my parents would be rather mad.
    I dunno if mere traffic counts as a reason to consider cycling unsafe.

    Not only do cars have to give way to cyclists so long as they obey the road rules (IIRC), you can also just cross roads like a Pedestrian and use the footpath.

    I guess if you live in alligator-infested gangland swamps where grizzly bears are hiding behind every rock then you might have a problem, but I'm used to crossing the busiest roads without even waiting for the right flashing lights. Traffic really isn't that bad.
    *Splendid Goatatar by that cool kid Serpentine
    "Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world"

  20. - Top - End - #20
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    RS14's Avatar

    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    GMT-8

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    Why on earth would you go?

    Play the slightly rebellious teen for a few more years until you need to dress in nice suits and attend stupid functions again.

  21. - Top - End - #21
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    The Rabbler's Avatar

    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Location
    the 64th layer
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    Quote Originally Posted by RS14 View Post
    Why on earth would you go?

    Play the slightly rebellious teen for a few more years until you need to dress in nice suits and attend stupid functions again.
    This.

    I am also 17, and at this point, my parents understand that, frankly, I don't care about meeting the friend of their friend's friend. Those kind of parties are uninteresting and annoying. Now seems like a good time to start showing your parents that you want to be more independent and that they need to get used to the idea.

    bluntness aside, I'm putting my vote towards biking to your previous engagement; though if the aforementioned conversation comes up, sugar-coat it a bit.
    *note: not all advice by this poster is meant to be taken seriously.

    Warlock/Swordsage avatar by yldenfrei

    optimization is like salt. a pinch here and there can't hurt, but too much will spoil everything.

    I have salty tastes.

  22. - Top - End - #22
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Cealocanth's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    Colorado
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    I'd go. You might get to know this person better. If he turns out to be a child-hating suicide bomber, I stand corrected. But I don't think he's that bad a guy (or girl).
    Currently RPG group playing: Endworld (D&D 5e. A Homebrewed post-apocalyptic supplement.)

    My campaign settings: Azura; 10,000 CE | The Frozen Seas | Bloodstones (Paleolithic Horror) | AEGIS - The School for Superhero Children | Iaphela (5e, Elder Scrolls)

  23. - Top - End - #23
    Titan in the Playground
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    Broken Damaged Worthless

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    Quote Originally Posted by Klose_the_Sith View Post
    I dunno if mere traffic counts as a reason to consider cycling unsafe.
    Tell that to Dallas, TX, where the traffic AIMED for me on more than a handful of occasions.

    I love my bike, but I'm skittish around it now, since, well, yeah. Having to dodge blood-crazed motorists is NOT a good time.

    All that I say applies only to myself. You author your own actions and choices. I cannot and will not be responsible for you, nor are you for me, regardless of situation or circumstance.

  24. - Top - End - #24
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    KenderWizard's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Location
    Dublin, Ireland
    Gender
    Female

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    Quote Originally Posted by Klose_the_Sith View Post
    Well I've been to every event that I've been invited too under this spectrum and I've regretted it every single time. It's always been the same damn thing and I can never talk to strangers under pressure anyway ...

    Although if you recall I still recommended going, just having a plan b.

    Now get thine damn optimism hence
    Aw, that's a shame. It is much better if you're able/in the mood to talk to random strangers, alright! But I shall retain my optimism!

    Quote Originally Posted by The Rabbler View Post
    This.

    I am also 17, and at this point, my parents understand that, frankly, I don't care about meeting the friend of their friend's friend. Those kind of parties are uninteresting and annoying. Now seems like a good time to start showing your parents that you want to be more independent and that they need to get used to the idea.

    bluntness aside, I'm putting my vote towards biking to your previous engagement; though if the aforementioned conversation comes up, sugar-coat it a bit.
    On the other hand (the first hand being my optimism for the party), it could be, as The Rabbler says, a good chance to show some independence, if you can find a safe bike route to your previous engagement. But it's not worth getting hit by a car. I'd have been in the same situation: some roads are just dangerous for cyclists, and it would be irresponsible to try something that could get you in a traffic accident for the sake of avoiding a couple of hours of small talk and hors d'oeuvres.

    Unless you have a safe bike route, I still vote party.

  25. - Top - End - #25
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Xyk's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Location
    Austin, TX
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    In this situation I, (also being 17), would ask a friend from the prior engagement to give me a ride to said engagement. If it is within easy bicycling distance, that works too, but it would seem it is not, (traffic wouldn't stop me but distance definitely would). Honestly, those parents-forced grown-up parties are boring and awkward. A bunch of people at least twenty years older than you who know things about you through your parents is really not a fun activity.

    Terrible grammar aside, either get a ride from a friend to the fun thing or stay home and play zelda.
    I take this game with the seriousness it deserves.
    Not all that much. It's a game.

    Xykon In The Playground nominee, way back when that happened.

    Rebel Leader

    Breakfast-atar by The Neoclassic whom I appreciate very much!

  26. - Top - End - #26
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Mystic Muse's Avatar

    Join Date
    Mar 2009

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    Quote Originally Posted by Xyk View Post
    Terrible grammar aside, either get a ride from a friend to the fun thing or stay home and play zelda.
    Actually, I was going to go with Ogre battle 64 but that works too.

    There are other people there roughly my age but, like I said, They like hanging out with my siblings better.

  27. - Top - End - #27
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Xyk's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Location
    Austin, TX
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    Quote Originally Posted by Kyuubi View Post
    Actually, I was going to go with Ogre battle 64 but that works too.

    There are other people there roughly my age but, like I said, They like hanging out with my siblings better.
    No I meant to your prior engagement that you are unable to attend due to your parents' party. If you have friends from that thing that can drive, do that.
    I take this game with the seriousness it deserves.
    Not all that much. It's a game.

    Xykon In The Playground nominee, way back when that happened.

    Rebel Leader

    Breakfast-atar by The Neoclassic whom I appreciate very much!

  28. - Top - End - #28
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Mystic Muse's Avatar

    Join Date
    Mar 2009

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    Quote Originally Posted by Xyk View Post
    No I meant to your prior engagement that you are unable to attend due to your parents' party. If you have friends from that thing that can drive, do that.
    I will if I can. Ogre battle is in case I have no way to get there that my parents will allow. I'm still living under their roof so I still have to follow their rules and if they say none of the options are acceptable then that's that.
    Last edited by Mystic Muse; 2010-07-15 at 02:58 AM.

  29. - Top - End - #29
    Bugbear in the Playground
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    Australia!
    Gender
    Female

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    I'm seconding the not-safe-by-bicycle thing...around here, everything is technically reachable by bike, but certainly not safe to do so. Drivers have absolutely no sense of care around cyclists, and often don't even realise they're there. It's really dangerous.

  30. - Top - End - #30
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    Sc00by's Avatar

    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    UK
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: An annoying situation

    Go, get drunk, fall over a lot, throw up over the host, embarrass your parents. Never get invited again!

    (no, not really - it never worked for me : )

    Serious advice below:
    Talk it through with your parents, most parents were young once and some can even still remember it. Explain that you're not really looking forward to it and that you'd much rather be [where you'd rather be] and could they drop you off on thier way to the party, please?

    You never know...

    At 16 or 17 I had a ticket to a gig in a field (what is now the Download festival only in 198something). I never quite got round to having the above conversation with my Parents and spent the weekend @ my Grans. I was really, really miserable. And the stupid thing is that if I'd addressed it head on in reasonable time I probably could've gone to the gig. Hey ho.
    Avatar by Sneak (a long, long time ago)

    What Hayley Said

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •