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  1. - Top - End - #811
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    Superglucose's Avatar

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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    Quote Originally Posted by arguskos View Post
    Law #2 is in general, not just during the asking out. "Dating" is a big category dude.
    Don't be creepy is a general rule of life, and is not exclusive to dating.

  2. - Top - End - #812
    Titan in the Playground
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    Quote Originally Posted by Superglucose View Post
    Don't be creepy is a general rule of life, and is not exclusive to dating.
    Of course not. I just include it as a rule everywhere, since apparently folks need reminders all over the damn place.

    All that I say applies only to myself. You author your own actions and choices. I cannot and will not be responsible for you, nor are you for me, regardless of situation or circumstance.

  3. - Top - End - #813
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    Whereas I say dating has one (really wordy) law to keep my advice simple.

    Since pretty much the main thing people ask for is something along the lines of "I like her, what do I do?"

  4. - Top - End - #814
    Miniature Giant Space Hamster in the Playground Administrator
     
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    Word of advice. Never choose a password that reminds you of someone you are close to. Because, if it ends terribly, every time you go to access the program and need to remember the password, even if you have long since changed the password, you are reminded of what happened even years later.

    "My Hobby: Replacing your soap with gravy" by rtg0922, Doll and Clint "Rawhide" Eastwood by Sneak

  5. - Top - End - #815
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    ... that sounds ouch

  6. - Top - End - #816
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    Quote Originally Posted by Rawhide View Post
    Word of advice. Never choose a password that reminds you of someone you are close to. Because, if it ends terribly, every time you go to access the program and need to remember the password, even if you have long since changed the password, you are reminded of what happened even years later.
    similar rules apply to tattoos

    blood relatives and children only!
    pancake-atar created by RTG0922

    Quote Originally Posted by loopy View Post
    xPANCAKEx - He's a scumbag, but he's a wise scumbag.

  7. - Top - End - #817
    Colossus in the Playground
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    I know a woman who changed her "Ricky" tattoo to "TRicky Woman" after her break-up.

  8. - Top - End - #818
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    Quote Originally Posted by MountainKing View Post
    I'm gonna home in on this statement specifically, and call shenanigans, because I hold that there is no such thing as flirting "skill". If you're consciously trying to do it, it's not actually flirting. I say that, because I can't count the number of times my friends have cajoled me for making conversation with women on the grounds of "flirting", and yet I've never, EVER actually tried to do it. In fact, I'm convinced that, you can't actually flirt by will; if it isn't a natural reaction, then you're faking it, and that's just not nice.

    In short: Shenanigans. Do it anyway.
    I call shenanigans on YOU, sir!

    You're basically saying that if you're consciously flirting, it's fake, or, the other way round, that unconscious flirting is always genuine. In my opinion, neither are true. Of course, it depends on what you constitute as "fake". One could say you simply mean that it needs to come spontaneously in order not to be fake, but in that case I don't think you could be so damning of "faking it". I think what you mean by fake is ungenuine, untruthful to even deceiving. Correct me if I'm wrong, but that's what seems to be implied.

    If that's the case, I have to disagree. Let's examine the first option: person A likes person B and decides to show this by flirting with her. Consciously, and thus fake as you like to put it. Is it a bad thing person A decides to flirt with her and is aware of his own feelings? No, that's self knowledge (as we all know the first tred on that long stairway to wisdom) and self control, both admirable qualities.

    Maybe you'll say "well, if he likes her, he'd automatically flirt with her, naturally, without having to decide to!". Well, I've got news for you: there's plenty of people that don't have this reflex. Count yourself blessed that you do, but loads of folk have an innate shyness they need to overcome before they can "flirt". On the flipside of the coin though, I'd seriously question your unawareness of your own flirting, natural as it may be. How much are you really into someone if you don't even know you're into them? Are you even into them, or do you just flirt automatically?

    This brings us to scenario 2: a gentleman (or a lady) who is sometimes referred to as a "player" has become so accustomed to flirting that they do it automatically, without a second though, without knowing they're doing it. I've personally seen this happen. Guys and girls used to flirting a lot who suddenly have boy/girlfriends or are otherwise unavailable who flirt out of reflex. They're not really interested, but they've just become so accustomed to flirting it's their standard way of dealing with the other sex (or the same sex, as the case might be).

    Would this qualify as "nice"? I think not, conscious or unconscious, this is behaviour that could hurt people. Signals should be sent intentionally, that's what they're for. Signalling. I'm not saying you, my dear bearded gentleman, belong in this latter category, but still, a warning needs to be made to the world in general. Your philosophy is flawed in these areas.

    Also,
    Quote Originally Posted by Superglucose View Post
    19/2+7 = 16.5 < 17

    You're golden, bro.
    Article 113, nice!

    High five!
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  9. - Top - End - #819
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    Quote Originally Posted by arguskos View Post
    2. Don't be a creep.
    This explains everything! ...Just kiddin'.
    "'Intelligence' is really prolific in the world. So is stupidity. So often they occur in the same people." - Phaedra
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  10. - Top - End - #820
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    Demons, do NOT, I repeat- DO NOT- do anything unless you actually like her. A dream does not mean you like her. I had a dream I was dating a guy I knew a few years back. I wasn't at all attracted to him in real life. That would have been a Bad Basis for telling him I liked him.

    That said, if you DO like her, age is a non-issue in this case. 2 years in the upper part of high school isn't all that big of a gap, or even particularly uncommon. Unless you were like a junior in college and she's JUST going to be a senior, I don't think there would be an issue.



    One of the passwords I use regularly actually has ties to my ex. Is it weird that I don't even associate it with him? I've even utilized it post-break up for totally new things. Now I feel weird...
    Show me how pretty the world is
    'Cause I envy the way that you move
    Show me how pretty the world is
    'Cause I want something a little bit louder
    Show me how pretty the world is
    'Cause you're brilliant when you try
    Show me how pretty the whole world is tonight
    -Matt Nathanson "Pretty the World"

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  11. - Top - End - #821
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    Quote Originally Posted by Syka View Post
    One of the passwords I use regularly actually has ties to my ex. Is it weird that I don't even associate it with him? I've even utilized it post-break up for totally new things. Now I feel weird...
    It just means you're over him. I think it's healthy!
    Avatar by the illustrious Dr. Bath.


    The essence of a riddle is that it states facts by means of a combination of impossibilities~Aristoteles

    Help me run my very first campaign.

  12. - Top - End - #822
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    Quote Originally Posted by Serpentine View Post
    I know a woman who changed her "Ricky" tattoo to "TRicky Woman" after her break-up.
    see - if she had followed the rule she wouldn't have been in such trouble
    pancake-atar created by RTG0922

    Quote Originally Posted by loopy View Post
    xPANCAKEx - He's a scumbag, but he's a wise scumbag.

  13. - Top - End - #823
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    Quote Originally Posted by MrEdwardNigma View Post
    *snip*
    If you have to argue the semantics of it, by all means do so, but not with me. I'm of the strict belief that the subconscious mind holds our truest behaviors, and things we do unconsciously are by that virtue our most honest behaviors. If I'm *trying* to flirt with someone, it's because I shouldn't be wasting my time on them, but I am anyway, for whatever reason.

    What you do is up to you, but I'm sure you know the old cliche: write what you know.
    Amazing Mountain King avatar courtesy of the remarkable Starwoof!

  14. - Top - End - #824
    Colossus in the Playground
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    A single experience does not a universal truth make.

    Basically, it's all of the above: a subconcious habit, an innate talent, a learnable, practicable skill, and a conciously enjoyable pastime and interaction.
    Last edited by Serpentine; 2010-07-08 at 10:08 AM.

  15. - Top - End - #825
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    I think that MrEdwardNigma and MountainKing are flirting with each other.
    "'Intelligence' is really prolific in the world. So is stupidity. So often they occur in the same people." - Phaedra
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  16. - Top - End - #826
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    Quote Originally Posted by Pyrian View Post
    I think that MrEdwardNigma and MountainKing are flirting with each other.
    Maybe I should take notes.

  17. - Top - End - #827
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    Quote Originally Posted by MrEdwardNigma View Post
    This brings us to scenario 2: a gentleman (or a lady) who is sometimes referred to as a "player" has become so accustomed to flirting that they do it automatically, without a second though, without knowing they're doing it. I've personally seen this happen. Guys and girls used to flirting a lot who suddenly have boy/girlfriends or are otherwise unavailable who flirt out of reflex. They're not really interested, but they've just become so accustomed to flirting it's their standard way of dealing with the other sex (or the same sex, as the case might be).

    Would this qualify as "nice"? I think not, conscious or unconscious, this is behaviour that could hurt people. Signals should be sent intentionally, that's what they're for. Signalling.
    Now wait just a cotton-pickin' minute. I flirt with a lot of people. I'm totally uninterested in ~80% of them (female and male o.O). Does this make me a bad person? Or does it make me fun to be around and an ego booster? I've always thought the second option. It's not like I lead people on or... "Flirt maliciously"...
    I am continuing to have a social life. Sorry for the inconvenience.
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  18. - Top - End - #828
    Firbolg in the Playground
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    I flirt with every gilr I know. It's ended up with me having about 80% female friends. I really don't think it's a bad thing.

  19. - Top - End - #829
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    Quote Originally Posted by Pyrian View Post
    I think that MrEdwardNigma and MountainKing are flirting with each other.
    Oh crap, Pyrian's on to me! Too bad Ed didn't catch it. Oh well; you win some, you lose some.
    Amazing Mountain King avatar courtesy of the remarkable Starwoof!

  20. - Top - End - #830
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    Quote Originally Posted by skywalker View Post
    Now wait just a cotton-pickin' minute. I flirt with a lot of people. I'm totally uninterested in ~80% of them (female and male o.O). Does this make me a bad person? Or does it make me fun to be around and an ego booster? I've always thought the second option. It's not like I lead people on or... "Flirt maliciously"...
    This. also characters.

  21. - Top - End - #831
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    NecromancerGuy

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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    Weirdos. Flirting with ugly people. So weird. It's like, why?
    Quote Originally Posted by Keld Denar View Post
    +3 Girlfriend is totally unoptimized. You are better off with a +1 Keen Witty girlfriend and then appling Greater Magic Make-up to increase her enhancement bonus.
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  22. - Top - End - #832
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    Ever seen a girl blush at a compliment? That, my friends, is always worth your time.

  23. - Top - End - #833
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    Quote Originally Posted by Superglucose View Post
    Ever seen a girl blush at a compliment? That, my friends, is always worth your time.
    Some people are easily satisfied....
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  24. - Top - End - #834
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    it's pronounced "amused"

  25. - Top - End - #835
    Titan in the Playground
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    Quote Originally Posted by Superglucose View Post
    it's pronounced "amused"
    Is it? IS IT?! *The Rolling Stones start playing in the background*

    All that I say applies only to myself. You author your own actions and choices. I cannot and will not be responsible for you, nor are you for me, regardless of situation or circumstance.

  26. - Top - End - #836
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    OrcBarbarianGuy

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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    I flirt with a lot of people, mostly subconsciously and due an aspect of my personality that my friends have decided to explain as me rolling an 18 for Charisma. I flirt with people that I'm not interested in but I flirt differently with those I am interested, unfortunately since I do it subconsciously I've flirted with people whilst I'm in relationships and had to take special care not to say anything that could be construed as flirting.

    And yes, making someone blush when they've received a complement is very rewarding.

  27. - Top - End - #837
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    Quote Originally Posted by Eadin View Post
    Some people are easily satisfied....
    Have we mentioned recently how lovely you are?
    "'Intelligence' is really prolific in the world. So is stupidity. So often they occur in the same people." - Phaedra
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  28. - Top - End - #838
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    what does my lovelyness have to do with the subject?
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  29. - Top - End - #839
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    I was trying to make you blush!

    EDIT: Actually, in retrospect, I'm kind of curious. How is a random compliment in a discussion of flirting in any way NOT relevant?
    Last edited by Pyrian; 2010-07-08 at 03:40 PM.
    "'Intelligence' is really prolific in the world. So is stupidity. So often they occur in the same people." - Phaedra
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  30. - Top - End - #840
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    Default Re: Relationship Woes and Advice: The Thirteenth Woerier

    Quote Originally Posted by Pyrian View Post
    I was trying to make you blush!

    EDIT: Actually, in retrospect, I'm kind of curious. How is a random compliment in a discussion of flirting in any way NOT relevant?
    Ha! good luck
    It's almost impossible to make me blush
    Last edited by Eadin; 2010-07-08 at 03:46 PM.
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