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    biggrin Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    So a long time ago, I translated the story of Demeter and Persephone into lolcat. It still amuses me, so I've decided to do more, and hopefully inspire others to do the same.

    1. The Story of Persephone
    2. The Raven An illustrated translation


    =============================================

    The story of Persephone
    translated into Lolcat

    So one dai Hades goes to see Zeus and sez "Ohai. I can has ur daughter Persephone to marry?"

    And Zeus sez "No wai! If I sez yes, Demeter wud totally pwn me!" Demeter wuz one of Zeus's babymamas. He had lots of them cuz he wuz totally a playa.

    And Hades sez "If u sez no, I pwn you."

    So Zeus is all then sez "Um, okay, but dun tell anywun I sed that. So no big wedding. U haz to elope."

    So Persephone wuz hangin out wit her friends at teh mall when Hades shows up.

    "How YOU doing?" Hades says.

    "Lolwut? GTFO newb!"
    Persephone says.

    "Hay babee, I'm totally a god and all."

    "O rly?"

    "Ya rly."

    "No wai!"

    "Let me show you mah place."

    "Okay. Hay nymphs, tell mah mom I'll brb."

    And Persephone went off to the Underworld with Hades.

    So when Persephone's curfew was passed and she wuz still gone, Mamma Demeter wuz all sadface. So she called in sick to werk. It turned out no one knew how to do her job, which wuz changing of seasons. So everybody on erf start to get hongry.

    So they start crying to Zeus saying "We can haz noms? Kthxbai." And after a wile, he got tired of der whining. So he email his friend Hermes and say 'Hay, go down to underworld and get mah daughter."

    Hermes emailed back "Lolwut? Do it yourself!"

    And Zeus sez "I can't. Social Services took away mah parental rights after I got caught secksing in a swan costume." v.v

    Hermes wuz all, "No wai! A swan! That's sick, man." But he didn't want all hoomans to die of being hongry, so he went to get her.
    So Hermes goes to hell and sez "Ohai, Persephone. Tiem to go home nao."

    But she was all "Nuh-uh. Imma stay here. Hades loves me!"

    "Course I do, babe." Hades sez. "Hey, get me a beer before you go."

    "Get your own damn beer!" she sez. And they got in a fight. And she wuz so mad that she left with Hermes and went back to her mama's house.

    So spring comes back to Erf and crops grow and everywun iz happy again. Yays!

    Teh End


    Well, noes, not rly.

    At furst, Demeter wuz so happy to have her littel girl back dat she spoil her rottenz with nice things and not disagree wif anything she want. But she still teh mama, and so after a while, she start telling Persephone to clean her room and not to stay out too late and quit playing that damn music so loud. Persephone wuz all 'DO NOT WANT!' And Demeter wuz all 'As long as you live under MAH ROOF you obey MAH RULES!'

    So Persephone sez "I not have to live with you. I haz a husband, you know!"

    So she went back to Hades.

    An so Erf get all dark and cold again, until she fight with him and move back in with mama. And so on and so forf.

    An later she meets Odysseus and haz affair wit Adonis an other stuffs. But all dat anuder story.

    Teh End
    (dis time for realz)
    Last edited by happyturtle; 2010-08-27 at 10:38 PM.

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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    That was Win on every level of Win there is.
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    yuk Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    NO. Fail. Fail. Fail. NO.

    JUST. NO.

    Do not want. Bad. Do not want.

    JUST NO!
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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    Well, I thought it was funny.

    It helped that I knew the original story.
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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    Bah. Not a fan of this.

    But, Happy, if anarachy comes/society breaks down or whatever, and this is how the world thinks myths went, then I'm holding you responsible.

    Last edited by Dallas-Dakota; 2010-07-04 at 02:45 AM. Reason: spellllling
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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    Huh. That's a different version to the one I know.
    I think you'd like the lolBible

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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    I thought it was entertaining. I tend to do this internally during Classical Studies.

    And for some reason, making this comment led me to realise Aeneas hanging out with Dido for a year and then getting a kick up the rear from Mercury is a parallel to the start of the Odyssey!
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    And two out of three leading anthropomorphic personifications of death agree on the matter.
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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    I'm quite certain that Virgil took a great deal of inspiration from the Odyssey and Iliad, yes. Same with Argonautica.

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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    This is so awesome!

    I DEMANDZ MOAR!
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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    I love it.

    It's even better if you imagine all the characters being cats while reading the story.

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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    Ohhhhh man. Oh man. Oh. No.

    Nope.

    Even the lolcat bible is more than I can stomach.

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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    *helped translate the lolcat bible* >.>

    Thanks for the feedback, everyone. I am encouraged enough to keep going, and think my next piece will be a fairy tale.
    Last edited by happyturtle; 2010-07-04 at 10:10 AM.

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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    Stuff like this makes my day, all day, every day. I can has moar?
    "What can change the nature of a man?"

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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    When I have a child, I'm going to raise it solely on myths like these. As a social experiment.

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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    Yes, hello Ms. happyturtle, I'm here to revoke your license to in anyway reference Greek or any other ancient world mythology.
    Last edited by Dr.Epic; 2010-07-04 at 03:31 PM.

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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    Quote Originally Posted by Kaytara View Post
    When I have a child, I'm going to raise it solely on myths like these. As a social experiment.
    This is why they don't let you have children!

    *looks forward to the next one*
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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    Are you currently taking requests, happyturtle? I would love to see a lolcat story of Romeo and Juliet.

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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    Okay, THAT is awesome!!

    Do the entire Illiad next!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Klose_the_Sith View Post
    Thanks. I just happen to be a hug Grammar Nazi at times. Sorry if it bothers you at all.
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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    Quote Originally Posted by Slayer Draco View Post
    Are you currently taking requests, happyturtle? I would love to see a lolcat story of Romeo and Juliet.
    YES. THIS WOULD BE FANTASTIC.

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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    Quote Originally Posted by CoffeeIncluded View Post
    YES. THIS WOULD BE FANTASTIC.
    NO! It wouldn't!

    lolcat is inherently fail.

    we should not be encouraging the degradation of culture, spelling and grammar here. Nothing good can come of this.
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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    *points to title of the thread*

    *recommends people who dislike lolcat not visit*



    I'll have to give Romeo and Juliet a try.

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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Raziere View Post
    NO! It wouldn't!

    lolcat is inherently fail.

    we should not be encouraging the degradation of culture, spelling and grammar here. Nothing good can come of this.
    I think you're taking this too seriously. It's just for lulz, man.

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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Raziere View Post
    we should not be encouraging the degradation of culture, spelling and grammar here. Nothing good can come of this.
    As ancient lolcat scholars once said: Y u do diz?

    Unfortunately, something good has already come of this: It made me smile.

    Keep on keepin' on, Happyturtle. Looking forward to Romeocat and Julicat.

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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    Quote Originally Posted by Slayer Draco View Post
    I think you're taking this too seriously. It's just for lulz, man.
    {Scrubbed}
    Last edited by Roland St. Jude; 2010-07-05 at 10:35 AM.
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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Raziere View Post
    {scrubbed}
    Completely debatable, and if you don't like the thread, then you really don't have to go.

    I think this is hilarious, happyturtle.
    Last edited by Roland St. Jude; 2010-07-05 at 10:35 AM.
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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    This is starting to remind me of the "True Art" argument.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Klose_the_Sith View Post
    Thanks. I just happen to be a hug Grammar Nazi at times. Sorry if it bothers you at all.
    Regardless of whether that was intentional or not, I think I love you.


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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Raziere View Post
    {Scrubbed}
    Yes. That is true, there is a reason we have standards. I have standards, which include not going to a thread that says, in the title, that it contains lolspeak, and getting offended when it does contain lolspeak. That doesn't measure up to my standards of politeness.
    In other news: English is a bastard language anyway. It was only invented four hundred years ago has been being butchered ever since.

    @happyturtle: I can haz lolkitteh Anti-Gone-E? kthanxbai.
    Last edited by Roland St. Jude; 2010-07-05 at 10:36 AM.
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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    Quote Originally Posted by Dallas-Dakota View Post
    Bah. Not a fan of this.

    But, Happy, if anarachy comes/society breaks down or whatever, and this is how the world thinks myths went, then I'm holding you responsible.

    What amuses me about this is, even though you edited it to fix spelling, there's still a spelling error.

    Anarchy, not anararchy!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Klose_the_Sith View Post
    Thanks. I just happen to be a hug Grammar Nazi at times. Sorry if it bothers you at all.
    Regardless of whether that was intentional or not, I think I love you.


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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    Happy, that was amazing.

    I can haz Beowulf? kthnxbai!

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    Default Re: Famous stories, translated to lolcat

    Quote Originally Posted by Maximum Zersk View Post
    What amuses me about this is, even though you edited it to fix spelling, there's still a spelling error.

    Anarchy, not anararchy!
    No, definately anarachy. You know, when society breaks down to the point where the most common currency is sacs of live spider eggs?

    I have seen the future, my son, and I shall be making sure I stay fairly wealthy, and stay in the wealthier regions, where we'll only use ears of corn for money.
    Last edited by Lord Fullbladder, Master of Goblins; 2010-07-04 at 11:17 PM.
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