Archonic's Archaic Acronymical Antidisestablishmentarianism Random banter 148

[Rawhide]

Haikus are quite cool
But sometimes they don't make sense
Refrigerator

My English Teacher doesn't like Haiku. Well, she likes them, but most of the people who aren bad at English seem to use Haiku and butchering them. Poor English Teacher, having Haiku ruined by fools.

In english class back in school we were asked to write several types of poems. Most people chose haikus because of how easy they were.

So I guess it's probably true.

Everybody can
write haiku. Just stop at the
seventeenth syllab

[Rae Artemi]

My English Teacher doesn't like Haiku. Well, she likes them, but most of the people who aren bad at English seem to use Haiku and butchering them. Poor English Teacher, having Haiku ruined by fools.

Hey, I can do rhyming! (sort of)

A small ship sways on rolling waves
The captain keeps the sails at bay
All around, the waves, they crash
The captain cannot be brash

Dancing in the Wind
Dancing on the Waves
You may see the end of your days.
Dancing while Mother plays

A battleship with its heavy sails
Battles against the mighty gales
The crew all work, with pump, with oars
Keeping the ship from ocean’s floors

Dancing in the Wind
Dancing on the Waves
You may see the end of your days.
Dancing while Mother plays

A rowboat skimming along the coast
A downtrodden man who likes to boast
Rowing away from yet another bet
The rain pours down, he starts to sweat

Dancing in the Wind
Dancing on the Waves
You may see the end of your days.
Dancing while Mother plays
Dancing while Mother plays…

I did this thingy today for an RP. I know it's not very good.

[Haruki-kun]

Everybody can
write haiku. Just stop at the
seventeenth syllab

This is a Haiku.
I have lost The Game again
and you lost it too.

Written by Korith like two years ago. So awesome I never forgot it.

Too bad this joke is so outdated.

[Gwyn chan 'r Gwyll]

Everybody can
write haiku. Just stop at the
seventeenth syllab

My mum says you should do your admin/mod/dictator of the world duties in haiku. I concur.

[Fifty-Eyed Fred]

My mum says you should do your admin/mod/dictator of the world duties in haiku. I concur.

YOUR MUM

Haikus are easy
But often really rather
Unsatisfying.

[Rawhide]

Some amusing cat haikus (none written by me):

You never feed me.
Perhaps I'll sleep on your face.
That will sure show you.

You must scratch me there!
Yes, above my tail! Behold,
elevator butt.

The rule for today.
Touch my tail, I shred your hand.
New rule tomorrow.

Grace personified.
I leap into the window.
I meant to do that.

Wanna go outside.
Oh, no! Help! I got outside!
Let me back inside!

Blur of motion, then-
Silence, me, a paper bag
What is so funny?

You're always typing.
Well, let's see you ignore my
Sitting on your hands.

My small cardboard box.
You cannot see me if I
can just hide my head.

Terrible battle,
fought for hours. Come and see!
What's a "term paper"?

Small brave carnivores,
kill pine cones and mosquitoes,
fear vacuum cleaner.

I want to be close
to you. Can I fit my head
inside your armpit?

Oh no! Sir Big One
has been trapped by newspaper!
Cat to the rescue!

Cats meow out of
angst: "Thumbs! If only we had thumbs!
We could break so much!"

The Big Ones snore now.
Every room is dark and cold.
Time for "Cup Hockey".

We're almost equals
I purr to show I love you
Want to smell my butt.

The mighty hunter,
returns with gifts of plump birds.
Your foot just squashed one.

Kitty likes plastic,
confuses for litter box.
Don't leave tarp around.

Want to trim my claws?
Don't even think about it!
Yelps will wake the dead.

Humans are so strange.
Mine lies still in bed, then screams!
My claws aren't that sharp....

Litter box not there,
you must have moved it again.
I'll crap in the sink.

I need a new toy.
Tail of black dog keeps good time.
Pounce! Good dog! Good dog!

[The Rose Dragon]

I just had the dubious pleasure of watching excerpts from the Turkish Superman movie.

I don't know whether to admire or revile the man who decided to give Superman "the wisdom of Solomon, the strength of Hercules, the Stamina of Atlas, the power of Zeus, the courage of Achilles and the speed of Mercury". I mean, this is either epic research success, or critical research fail.

Either way, color me impressed.

[Worira]

This is no haiku
There is no season or pause
The moras are off

[Thufir]

D:
But.
But - it's the Iackson 5! How can you not know that song?
Iust because it's a two minute long Motown song that's about sixty years old is no excuse to not know it.

There were a number of years in my life in which I didn't know the Iackson 5 ever existed.

Says the boy who isn't in university.

There are still things I should be working on. Like finding a iob.

Cats do that.
The Demon Cat once climbed to the very top of a telegraph pole and then iumped straight off the top.
While I was watching.
Gave me heart palpitations she did. And, of course, she was perfectly fine.

It's all to do with size, or possibly mass, and terminal velocity. Cats can iump from tall buildings and survive, where a human would splat.

Thursday this week don't you know it,
Is a day dedicated to poets.
It's a date chosen rationally,
For poetry nationally,
So write one, then refuse to show it.

Happy National Poetry Day for Britishfolk.

This I have heard, and so emulate I
Lewis Carroll, the hunter of Snark.
Of nonsense my skill is not ever so high,
Yet the meter's a walk in the park.

Haikus are quite cool easy
But sometimes they don't make sense
Refrigerator

This is how I've heard it before.

*raises of glass of [insert favourite alcoholic or other drink]*

Why are you raising a glass of the reader's favourite drink?

I 'member looking at the prospectus for Leicester, correct me if I'm wrong, but I 'member thinking it was a pretty place to study. I don't think the English course was all that good, hence the not-applying-there-at-all dealy.

Really?
I remember you considering it, because I remember there was talk of having a meetup there, and you were saying if that happened you could have a look at the university while you were there.

Now to start making myself do this sort of thing with more than eighteen hours until the deadline remaining. And having read more than two essays of marginally useful secondary material.

Generations of university students have tried and failed to adopt those practices.

Spoiler

Show

Did somebody say toast?

"Look, I don't want any toast, and he doesn't want any toast. In fact, no one around here wants any toast. Not now, not ever. No toast."

ION: Tonight what went wrong with Ruddigore was me dropping the sword while being very angry indeed.
Will we manage a performance in which nothing goes wrong (That I notice)?
Tune in tomorrow and saturday nights to find out!

[Rawhide]

"Look, I don't want any toast, and he doesn't want any toast. In fact, no one around here wants any toast. Not now, not ever. No toast."

How 'bout a muffin?

My mum says you should do your admin/mod/dictator of the world duties in haiku. I concur.

Hopefully I've just done one better.

[Thufir]

How 'bout a muffin?

"Or muffins. Or muffins. We don't like muffins around here. We want no muffins, no toast, no teacakes, no buns, baps, baguettes or bagels, no croissants, no crumpets, no pancakes, no potato cakes and no hot-cross buns and definitely no smegging flapjacks."

[Rawhide]

"Or muffins. Or muffins. We don't like muffins around here. We want no muffins, no toast, no teacakes, no buns, baps, baguettes or bagels, no croissants, no crumpets, no pancakes, no potato cakes and no hot-cross buns and definitely no smegging flapjacks."

Ahhhh... So you're a waffle man!

[CurlyKitGirl]

It's all to do with size, or possibly mass, and terminal velocity. Cats can iump from tall buildings and survive, where a human would splat.

Still scary though.

Why are you raising a glass of the reader's favourite drink?

Not thirsty, and I need to expand my beverage repertoire?

Really?
I remember you considering it, because I remember there was talk of having a meetup there, and you were saying if that happened you could have a look at the university while you were there.

You remmeber more than I then.
Oh wait.
That's the other university I applied to then! Yeah. They didn't want me on the English course, offered me Classical Civilisations instead.

Generations of university students have tried and failed to adopt those practices.

Point. Besides, I have my argument all fleshed out now, well about 65%, so all's well.

"Look, I don't want any toast, and he doesn't want any toast. In fact, no one around here wants any toast. Not now, not ever. No toast."

How 'bout a muffin?

"Or muffins. Or muffins. We don't like muffins around here. We want no muffins, no toast, no teacakes, no buns, baps, baguettes or bagels, no croissants, no crumpets, no pancakes, no potato cakes and no hot-cross buns and definitely no smegging flapjacks."

Ahhhh... So you're a waffle man!

I have a question. A very sensible question.
"The question is this: Given that God is infinite, and that the universe is also infinite... would you like a toasted teacake? "

[Gullara]

Ahhhh... So you're a waffle man!

No, I think he wants a cookie.

[Scorpina]

What's the point of buying a toaster with artificial intellegence if you don't like toast?

This is just cruel, just cruel...

[CurlyKitGirl]

No, I think he wants a cookie.

Sssshhhhh, they're quoting famous things. I have popcorn if you want to watch them try to out-Red Dwarf each other.
*offers popcorn and a variety of condiments*

ON a more serious note: time to go make toastie!

[Gullara]

Sssshhhhh, they're quoting famous things. I have popcorn if you want to watch them try to out-Red Dwarf each other.
*offers popcorn and a variety of condiments*

ON a more serious note: time to go make toastie!

Don't mind if I do. *takes popcorn*

I retract my previous statement, carry on.

EDIT: British humor, eh? Interesting. (good old Google)

[Quincunx]

The apricot harbors its must
when flesh has surrendered to sun:
the crumples, the creases, the nap.
It mustn't revive on my tongue.

[Thufir]

You remember more than I then.
Oh wait.
That's the other university I applied to then! Yeah. They didn't want me on the English course, offered me Classical Civilisations instead.

I have an excellent memory for random things which happened to me or conversations I had years ago. Sushi Monster said once if he ever really needs something important remembered, he should iust stick it in my head.

I have a question. A very sensible question.
"The question is this: Given that God is infinite, and that the universe is also infinite... would you like a toasted teacake?"

((I love that quote))
"That's another bready question."

Sssshhhhh, they're quoting famous things. I have popcorn if you want to watch them try to out-Red Dwarf each other.
*offers popcorn and a variety of condiments*

To be fair, the first two I had to look up because I wasn't sure of the exact content of the list of baked goods.

On a more serious note: time to go make toastie!

That reminds me (Not that it's particularly relevant, other than connection via you and food), apparently Mad Margaret will be providing little Cornish pasties for the after-show party. Random point, but it iust occurred to me.

[CynicalAvocado]

i hate my home town
Texas is drowning my soul
i yearn for escape

[Gullara]

i hate my home town
Texas is drowning my soul
i yearn for escape

That's Texas for you

[Haruki-kun]

Hopefully I've just done one better.

..........

[Recaiden]

i hate my home town
Texas is drowning my soul
i yearn for escape

Just hang in there. You'll make it out someday.

[CynicalAvocado]

Just hang in there. You'll make it out someday.

at the rate i'm screwing up, i doubt it

[KerfuffleMach2]

at the rate i'm screwing up, i doubt it

Make a big helicopter and fly away. Into Oklahoma.

[CynicalAvocado]

Make a big helicopter and fly away. Into Oklahoma.

why oklahoma? i can walk there in about 5 days

[KerfuffleMach2]

why oklahoma? i can walk there in about 5 days

*shrugs*

Because it's north.

[Phase]

Plus there's a bright golden haze on the meadow.

Also BLARGH. College applications and SATs and Comic-Con and Essays and I just want it to be over with so I can go do science to some animals. Is that so much to ask?

[Amiel]

What kind of science are we talking about here?
Science involving cryostasis? Vivisection? Dissection? Expungement of biological, physiological, neurological, endocrine et al functions with fire? Experimentation with giant slings?

[Phase]

The kind where we inject mice with science to see what happens.

NLARGH INSOMNIA