[NEXUS] The Carpenter's

[Boo]

So here in a not-so-far away forest, a shack of modest construction sits leisurely beside a marmalade tree. The--What's that Paddington? You want to describe the place? Okay, here you go. *hands over mic*

*Brawrhem*

Brawr, braaaaawr. Brrrraaaaaaaawwwwwwrrrr. Brrawr braaawr brawr. Brrrraaawr, braaaaawwwwr brawrr. Brawrr braaaawr braaaaaawwwwr, brawwr. Brrrrawrrr braaaaaaaawwr, brawr. Braaaawwwrrrrr. Brrrrawwwr. Brawrharharhar! Brrrawrr, braaaawwwwwwwwwwwwrrr. Brrrrawwwwwrrrrrr, brawwr. Braaawrrrr. Braaaaawwwwwwrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. Brrrrawwrr, brawrrr.

*returns mic*

*sniff* That was so beautiful, Paddy. *wipes tear* I didn't know you had such a way with words. *sniff* I don't think I could ever translate that into English. It just... *sniff* English could never do it justice...

...

*turns attention back to YOU*

Paddington the Bear is trying his claws at carpentry and such. He doesn't really get the joke in the title, though. Too bad. I could have given it a suitable subtitle. Go ahead and enter the building. Payment is to be made in friendship or favours (if you're already his friend).

The door is always open.

"Brawr" Welcome.

[ThirdEmperor]

Chezchire pads up to the shack and meows loudly. Or, to be precise, yells the word meow.

[Boo]

Paddington, being the suave creation that he is, leans on the counter and counters with a purrrfect "Brawr." An obvious welcome. He rests his eyes on the entering entity upon their entry.

[ThirdEmperor]

Chezchire is a large (4 ft. Tall were he to stand up), very overweight dark and light orange striped cat. His eyes are also unusual, not different colors, or changing colors when he blinks or anything like that, they just don't look like eyes, despite obviously being eyes. Chezchire, with a dramatic flourish, pulls a set of blueprint out of thin air, which depict a giant, auto-reloading, dual-firing, amor piercing bow, which, were it to scale, would be around five feet long. I would like two of these made.

[Boo]

Paddy takes a looky at those blueprints. Holding back all forms of laughter (strange humour indeed), he rolls up the prints and nods to the house honey. While placing the plans under the counter, he grabs a plain piece of paper. Reaching for a pen from behind his back, he draws a balloon attached to a string. It's a childish picture--terrible lines and barely looks like what he intended. Inside the balloon, he writes the number 6, followed by a "D" I think.

There is a box of dice to Chezchire's left.

[ThirdEmperor]

Chezchire opens the box of dice, slightly confused.

[Boo]

Inside are several sub-standard dice of multi-sidedness. Paddy gestures for Chezzy to roll a die (specifically a six-sided one). Each one is screaming, anticipating being thrown like garbage across the rough, splintered table top. They're BEGGING to be scratched and damaged. O won't you appease their pleas? To be tossed with the grains... Dear me, they're getting flustered just thinking about it! Look how much redder they've become! You'd better act fast! Paddy's getting a bit nervous too. It seems he doesn't like it when they get that colour.

[ThirdEmperor]

Chezchire stares at the begging dice, then cruely closes the box. He coughs, as though about to spit out a hairball, then spits a six sided die made out of unidentifiable bone into his palm, the die completely clean despite just coming out of his throat. He grins unpleasantly, and throws the die.

[roll]1d6[/roll]

[Boo]

I'm pretty sure forum based rolls don't work outside of the TTG forums. At least... I can't see any results--only the code.

http://invisiblecastle.com/roller/

[ThirdEmperor]

Chezchire grins as the dice comes up a six.

http://invisiblecastle.com/roller/view/2765613

(Dangit, that link didn't work.)

[Boo]

I'll just believe you.

A sly look overcomes Paddy's face. Hm, I wonder what that could mean.

"Brawrharharharhar!" A Boorish laugh, no doubt. It appears he declined to mention what the number meant. He finishes the scribbled balloon by adding the letters "A-Y-S" to the "D". In other words: The items will be finished in six days. For me, that's November 20th.

The Bear stretches out an arm to shake paws and lock claws with his new buddy. The deal is done.

There is a pink balloon with "6" scribed on it waiting outside. It's string is anchored by a small rock.

[ThirdEmperor]

Chezchire shakes paws then heads on out, grabbing the balloon as he does so. I get the impression that I may get more than I ordered, but that's half the fun.

[Boo]

"...a giant, auto-reloading, dual-firing, amor piercing bow, which, were it to scale, would be around five feet long."

Paddington worked day and night on the design. He discovered the flaws and good points of each part quickly. By the end of each day, he was quite frustrated with it's problems. Of course, he did have a good laugh when he read "armour piercing" since that's generally up to the arrows and their bowman.

By this, the sixth day, he stepped into work with two bows. Why anyone would need two longbows is beyond him, but that was the order. Maybe one's for a special friend?

The bows are almost identical (he's not a machine), and are quite plain in quality. They're pretty, and can fire up to two arrows each (if not awkwardly). As promised, they are both five feet in height (or length), and the body is quite strong to support this. They are not "armour piercing" or "auto-reloading" because that was an impossible task for the bow alone. You may as well have a robot fire it, or get pre-programmed robot arms attached to your body. On the string, there's a hardened piece of leather with two notches parallel to the duel notches on the body.

Had these been crossbows, then it would have easily been possible to add the rest of the features.

My and Paddy's only concern is with the devices requiring long arms to reach an ideal and safe draw length. Hopefully, Chezzypuss is drinking milk regularly.

[ThirdEmperor]

(Oops. Ah well, this might be even cooler. Can't fire yourself from a crossbow after all.)

Chezchire shows up to collect his order. How much does this cost?

[Boo]

Paddington doesn't say a word, but instead: he reaches out with his paw to suggest a handshake. I think he's smiling.

[ThirdEmperor]

Chezchire shakes his hand.

[Boo]

"Brawr!" Paddington cheers, implying something about the two now being friends. He brawrs more, explaining the payment was friendship. In the future, you will owe him favours for his work, but for now: friendship. "Brawrar." Enjoy your bows.

[ThirdEmperor]

Having no idea what the bear is saying, Chezchire collects his bows and runs off to do some bow hunting.

[Gullara]

Nite enters the structure and approaches Paddington, "I hear you are a carpenter of some skill. I have a request for you."

EDIT: Paddington appears to be too busy to talk, so Nite leaves.