Help Me Be Annoying with a Barbarian Wizard

[nedz]

Krog crafts magic items now:
Bag of Tricks - Sack full of small forest critters
Staff of Power - Greatclub
Rodney of Metamagic - requires Leadership for WizardBarbarian cohort

[Hiro Protagonest]

Top 3 ways (in no particular order) to have a thread NOT get locked for Threadcomancy.

1. It is an FAQ type thread (usually gets Stickied).

2. It is a [class]-Handbook thread.

3. The thread is pure undiluted awesomeness.

That is all.

4. PM a mod. Get their permission to raise it. It's in the rules.

Plus I don't think this has every gone 6 weeks between posts.

[Doughnut Master]

Minor Creation- He just rips some plants out of the ground.

"You pretty. I use wizard powers to make you flowers. We married now."

[Black_Zawisza]

Create Water: Thog passing urine.

[nedz]

Create Water: Thog passing urine.

Create Food: (I think I'll just leave that to your imagination)

[Diefje]

Paint your "familiar" silver, claim you are a master golemmaster.

Live in a house with bricked up doors, claim it is your mage tower. Teleport in/out via jumping through the window. Have animated discussion about wizardry with anyone who manages to penetrate your magical defenses.

Stand on a bridge, screaming "YOU SHALL NOT PASS" and proceed to sunder the bridge. Bonus points for saying "run, you fools" to bewildered bystanders as you fall.

Arcane Mark - punch someone in the face, so you can find him later on with your magical fist-shaped bruise-colored rune.

Liveoak - the tree next to your house has a smileyface carved into it. Claim it is a treant that guards your mage tower. And that druids stole the spell from master wizards such as yourself.

Plane Shift - after successfully teleporting your party, inform them you have arrived on the plane that looks exactly like the Material Plane, except all dragons wear moustaches. Inquire about said moustache with the next dragon you meet.

[The Boz]

My cheeks hurt from laughing.

[A_S]

Take the Leadership feat to get a cohort:
-Prestidigitation: "GET OVER HERE AND CLEAN THIS UP!"
-Unseen Servant: "GIMME THAT!"
-Amanuensis: "Here, copy this!"
-Message: "Pssst! Go tell the cleric to come heal me!"
-True Strike: He flanks for you.
-Identify: "Hey, go find out what the hell this thing is."
-Mirror Image: You dress him in the same armor you're wearing and have him stand next to you.
-Luminous Assassin: Dress the cohort in something shiny, then yell at him to kill somebody.

[Mrgnjr]

This has got to be the best idea I've heard, Ever! i want to know how this character works out when someone gets a chance to play him.

[Gavinfoxx]

-True Strike: He flanks for you.

He flanks for you and tries to aid another so you can hit!

[Socratov]

Hold person/animal/dimensional anchor: he grapples...

[cthulhubear]

Fireball: He grabs an enemy or ally if your feeling gutsy, preferably an elf, sets them on fire, and throws them.

[DrDeth]

We had a player do something quite a bit like this once. It was hilarious the first game. Mild chuckles the 2nd. Annoying as all heck after that, to the point where about the 5th time one of his fellow players said “If you’re gonna run him again, then I am just going to sit out. “ So, please, if this is a one shot in a not serious game, by all means do it.

But just be aware the joke gets old pretty fast.

[Dr.Epic]

His spells are written on weapons. A dagger is the equivalent of two pages from a spell book (since it has two sides). Bigger weapons are more pages. Your character will then memorize spells by starring at weapons.

[Socratov]

His spells are written on weapons. A dagger is the equivalent of two pages from a spell book (since it has two sides). Bigger weapons are more pages. Your character will then memorize spells by starring at weapons.

ofcourse Korg gijsh then...

[Grytorm]

Invisibility- Korg close eyes amd shout "Korg no see you!"

Greater Invisibility- Same as Invisibility, but Korg take off clothing!

[Rubik]

He can cast Create Water a few times per day, but only when his bladder is really full.

He can cast Simulacrum, but his version is a ritual requiring two people, the other of which must be female, and it takes about 20 years to finish...

To cast Grease, he simply doesn't bathe for a few weeks then rubs them on his head.

His version of Shatter is to sunder his opponent's weaponry. His even works on magic weapons!

[Suteinu]

Just saw this. Reminds me of a character my younger brother played back in 2nd Ed: a kender archer w/ Bands of Billaro and a Wand of Wonder, between which he had convinced himself that he was a wizard.

Is still waiting for an invitation to take his Test in a Tower of High Sorcery.

[doko239]

Some gear for Krog the Mighty Wizard:

Gauntlets of Ogre Power (on a string thru his armor, so he doesn't lose them)

Bag of Holding (which contains a full kitchen, his mother, and a bottle of air; Bag lunch everyday!)

Wand of Haste (Only works on his familiar for some reason. Also, looks suspiciously like a launching crossbow)

[Ranting Fool]

If I were dming a "wizard" like this, I would so create an evil animated windmill for the party to battle.

Yes that would be a way to go

Well I laughed a little too hard there

Now if I was in a party with Mighty Wizard Krog I would play a beguiler and watch how confused everyone got when Krog started randomly to do some really funky spells Oh the confusion Oh the jokes that could be made *I'm tempted to add a few more smilies but I don't want to get banned + my face hurts now*

[TuggyNE]

: TURN UNTHREAD!

Seriously: this was and is an awesome thread, but it's past the limit, sorry.

[Hiro Protagonest]

: TURN UNTHREAD!

Seriously: this was and is an awesome thread, but it's past the limit, sorry.

It hasn't been six weeks. If there was a necro, it was a while ago.

But yeah, it's getting annoying.

[Rubik]

: TURN UNTHREAD!

Seriously: this was and is an awesome thread, but it's past the limit, sorry.

And I say that's a stupid reason to lock a thread. If it's awesome and there's more to discuss, we should be able to without cluttering up the server with redundant topics.

That's 99% of why we have Monkdays around here.

[TuggyNE]

It hasn't been six weeks. If there was a necro, it was a while ago.

But yeah, it's getting annoying.

The necro I referred to was, indeed, a few weeks ago

01-03-2012 04:54 PM to 04-02-2012 12:30 PM.

[grarrrg]

The necro I referred to was, indeed, a few weeks ago

01-03-2012 04:54 PM to 04-02-2012 12:30 PM.

This thread has been Necro'd at least 4 times by now.
I think its Saves are too high.

[Rubik]

His version of swiftblade is the triple-deluxe espressoccino he drinks every morning.

[Gnome Alone]

It's been necro-ed a lot. Always cracks me up. Also that's the second time someone's made the joke about it too high of a level to be turned or something. I still have yet to actually play Korg the Magical, but the night is young and all.

[TuggyNE]

Also that's the second time someone's made the joke about it too high of a level to be turned or something.

Someone should stat up a silly template that is applied to Plants* to make them undead and give them a great deal of turn resistance.

*Thread? Anything?

[Zubrowka74]

I don't know if it has been mentioned yet but...

Power Word, Disgust : Burps and belches

Cloudkill : Cracks a huge fart.

(It's a barbarian after all, eh)

[QuidEst]

Prismatic Ray: Krog point at rainbow, then Krog hit seven people while they distracted.
Glitterdust: Krog squish sparkly fairy.
Fly: Krog hold arms out sideways and make "BBbbbbbbbb!" noise. Others not understand. Krog just ahead of Krog's time.
Raise Dead: Krog lift dead guy. What? Is Cleric spell? Oh. Krog not lift dead guy. Krog put dead guy back down. All better, see?
Ghost Sound: Krog go "Ooooh! OoooOOoooooh! Boogaboogabooga!"
Disrupt Undead: Krog think battleaxe component of spell disrupt undead pretty good.
Touch of Fatigue: Krog touch back of person's head, hard. Person so fatigued, person go to sleep.
Touch of Idiocy: Krog touch back of person's head, very hard.
Message: KROG WHISPER REALLY LOUD.
Comprehend Languages: Krog understand what funny Dwarfy man is saying. Krog just not tell you.
Detect Thoughts: Hmm. Krog will listen to person's thoughts. Hmm. Person is wishing person could just say thoughts out loud right now. Person is also wishing for Krog to hit person very, very hard. Person is lucky, and can pick one!
False Life: What is you needing Krog cast False Life for? You is playing D&D, and is having false life already.