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  1. - Top - End - #271
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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Is the "Sample encounter" part of the PrC mandatory?
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  2. - Top - End - #272
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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Quote Originally Posted by Sgt. Cookie View Post
    Is the "Sample encounter" part of the PrC mandatory?
    No. The rest is, but making a sample PC has never really been required.

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  3. - Top - End - #273
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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Alright, thanks DIT.
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  4. - Top - End - #274
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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    And the Procrastinator is up.

    Ironically, I've nerver create a Prc so fast before.
    If someone is willing to peach my clas I'll peach yours.
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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    And the Procrastinator is up.

    Ironically, I've nerver create a Prc so fast before.
    If someone is willing to peach my clas I'll peach yours.
    Hrrrrrrrrm. Maybe later.

    Naw, but srsly, i'll have a go.

    Looking at it straight away, the Special requirement is a bit iffy. I'm pretty sure you mean these conditions, but you might want to make it clearer.

    Next, I'll do that later, while not that complicated, looks a bit foreboding. You'll need some spaces in the paragraph somewhere.

    You don't need that yet needs to say what happens after it's used and the target moves father than 30ft away, because I'm reading that the effect stops being delayed if the target moves away.

    Take it easy is........quite strong. Very strong, in fact. Maybe shuffle it up a bit higher in the level acquisition. Maybe scale out how long it lasts. Maybe I'm overreacting.

    Not so fast seems a bit wierd with the %'s. Maybe just state "You lose X amount of attacks in a full attack"? Also, is the Note: part saying the creature can make a single melee attack as a standard action, even under this effect?

    I don't see a save on Wait a little. I'm guessing you forgot that. Likewise, no save on Not so soon?

    Just a little longer seems weird, considering it doesn't have any spells of its own, unless it works on it's own supernatural abilities, but then you really should define "magical effect" a bit better.

    You'll do that later looks ok.

    I forgot about that is essentially a "Hell Naw" button, which is always a nice capstone, so well done with that. Nothing to say there.

    In conclusion, the class looks very good, but does need one or two clarifications. Other than that, great stuff.
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  6. - Top - End - #276
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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    And the Procrastinator is up.

    Ironically, I've nerver create a Prc so fast before.
    If someone is willing to peach my clas I'll peach yours.
    As much as I should be doing my own PrC, I'll go ahead and give it a crack!

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    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    BECOMING A PROCRASTINATOR
    *snip*
    Fluff seems nice. I always shriek a little at seeing classes that "give benefits" to spellcasters without actually giving casting, though.

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    ENTRY REQUIREMENTS
    Skills: Concentration 8 ranks, Spellcraft or Psicraft 4 ranks, Knowledge (the planes) 4 ranks
    Feats: Iron Will
    Special: Must have suffered from at least ten different harmful conditions (see I’ll do that later) during your adventuring carer so far.
    The "See do that later" should probably go to a side bar, since I noticed you mention what these "effects" are in the first class feature. For language just change it to "See the following sidebar for what counts as a 'harmful effect.'"

    Other than that, entry requirements are easy. For noncasters, the easiest entry requirements are probably Factotum. Martial Adepts could also sneak in as could anyone who throws a feat to a Diamond Mind maneuver.

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    Class Skills
    The Class Name's class skills (and the key ability for each skill) are Autohypnosis (Wis), Bluff (Cha), Concentration (Con), Disguise (Cha), Heal (Wis), Hide (Dex), Intimidate (Cha), Perform (Cha), Psicraft (Int), Spellcraft (Int), Spot (Wis), Survival (Wis)
    Skills Points at Each Level: 4 + int
    Class list and skill points per level fit. As you require Knowledge (The Planes) to enter, it really should be a class skill. Having requirement X not being a class skill really, really bugs me.

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    *de-tabled*
    Hit dice, BAB, and saves seem appropriate. Lack of no new proficiencies are neither here nor there.


    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    I’ll do that later (Su):*snip*
    As an aside, from an editing perspective, this needs some more spaces in it. Maybe also a sidebar, but whatever. There's a lot there, as far as rules text goes, so it makes it somewhat hard to read. You also have some languages issues with plurals. If ya want, send me a PM and I could hunt those down for ya! (I seem to recall you saying you're a non-native speaker.)

    First level portion of it is rather minor, but not bad. It's the meat of the class and pseudo-DR as a class feature is rather nice. Maybe also allow "healing" spells to be delayed, too, if you delayed damage - or at least mention what happens with that interaction as with the Crusader's Delayed Damage Pool.

    Third level portion is nice. Because of the long list, I think it should be in a sidebar, but that's just me.

    Fifth level looks a little odd at first because it seems contradictory without looking down to 7th level. Not sure how you could clean up the wording to make it "flow," but this is otherwise a nice feature.

    Seventh level looks a bit light, as a lot of "magical effects" include ability damage (that and - by all other sources - (SU) abilities are "magical"). I understand wanting to delay ability damage as its own thing separate from 5th level, however. I just personally feel it should be thrown in with the 5th level ability, but by 10th level (at its earliest), I want to delay ability damage rather than waiting till 12th level when I could have been facing shadows since level 3. The fact that this is the only class feature at level 7 also just sort of "irks" me, so take that into consideration.

    Ninth level is a nice growth from the rest of the ability. It still doesn't stop (most) maneuvers nor does it prevent other, nondamage (EX) abilities.

    If I were to do this, I'd merge the 5th and 7th level abilities, make the 9th the 7th level ability and come up with a new "No, wait guys!" capstone for "I'll do that later!"

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    You don’t need that yet (Su): *snip*
    I like this! It competes with using the same action as "I'll do that later!" which is bad, but the system doesn't really handle multiple swift/immediate actions per turn.



    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    Take it easy (Su): *snip*
    I love this class feature. It reminds me of Spate's old "Clerics of the mundane" and its large "NO!" to all sorts of weird voodoos. Most casters may do well against the Will Save just due to 7 levels of good will save. Same goes to monsters with good will saves, but hot dang! I love the idea of this ability turning everyone's tricks into pseudo-breath weapons.

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    Not so fast (Su):*snip*
    I like this. The table is super useful, even if it is a lot to read (again, "time" does that to things). Overall, a nice way to punish "mundanes" like the casters in the same way that "Take it easy" does. I do not envy you for having to make the table, though. The note also helps, since it seems the idea isn't to out-and-out say "no" to basic attacks, but rather just to limit them to one (given the base fighter example). Using percentages does that well.

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    Wait a little (Su):*snip*
    I love this! It's a lot like "White Raven Tactics" reversed. The language needs some work, as it is initially confusing, but, I do love the idea about it. Reading everything up until this point makes the class feel like an odd, non-caster debuffer. The fact that it screws with the "rocket tag" feel of higher level DND helps, in my opinion, too!

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    Not so soon (Su):*snip*
    Another solid class feature. It's an odd sort of "enabler" ability, but not bad. You still have the "see do that later" in there, as a hold over, but otherwise, nice!

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    Just a little longer (Su):*snip*
    You need to clean up the wording some what, but, overall, I like the idea of extending some buff spells and the like by this ability by just a little more. Rather useful, honestly, as it can act like 1/4 of an extend spell up to three times per day.

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    You’ll do that later (Su): *snip*
    Love this! It feels "late," but it is incredibly powerful. It needs an action listing, as it seems a bit ambiguous. My gut says it is a non-action and happens with along with I'll do that later, which is fine. The fact that it says "you must still be effected" bugs me, as it means a Procrastinator can't use it to "dispel" some sort of buff, but I think that may be intentional, simply due to being able to stop all sorts of debuffs itself is rather, well, powerful.

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    I forgot about that (Su):*snip*
    I like this! Once per encounter, X doesn't happen. Really good capstone, really appropriate, too!

    Overall, this very much feels like "Madfoam Rager: the Class!" And I like that.


    I feel like I'm going to tell a lot of people in my PEACHes to "cut down on words," because, let's not kid ourselves, time is a bitch to think about in the context of a game. And so help me god if I see more than one "re-wind a round" abilities in a single class. On paper, they are a cute idea, but, as far as actual gaming goes, they can be nigh-impossible to actually run.
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  7. - Top - End - #277
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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Quote Originally Posted by TheGeckoKing View Post
    Hrrrrrrrrm. Maybe later.

    Naw, but srsly, i'll have a go.

    Looking at it straight away, the Special requirement is a bit iffy. I'm pretty sure you mean these conditions, but you might want to make it clearer.
    The list of condition is indicated in the description of the I'll do that later ability. I'll add a spoiler with the list to make thing clearer.

    Next, I'll do that later, while not that complicated, looks a bit foreboding. You'll need some spaces in the paragraph somewhere.
    Good point.

    You don't need that yet needs to say what happens after it's used and the target moves father than 30ft away, because I'm reading that the effect stops being delayed if the target moves away.
    I didn't think of that interpretation i'll change the wording.

    Take it easy is........quite strong. Very strong, in fact. Maybe shuffle it up a bit higher in the level acquisition. Maybe scale out how long it lasts. Maybe I'm overreacting.
    It doesn't seem that strong to me for two reason first it's a Will save and spellcaster generally have very good will save and second you need to choose careffuly, it's not always obvious which creature can cast spell.

    Not so fast seems a bit wierd with the %'s. Maybe just state "You lose X amount of attacks in a full attack"? Also, is the Note: part saying the creature can make a single melee attack as a standard action, even under this effect?
    My first instinct was straith number of attack (1,2,3) but I realise that monster with lot of attack would less affected so I decided to go with a percentage.

    I don't see a save on Wait a little. I'm guessing you forgot that. Likewise, no save on Not so soon?
    I did forgot the save for the first save but there none for not so soon because you target the effect itself not the creature. (well it's the logic anyway) Do you think it really need a save ?

    Just a little longer seems weird, considering it doesn't have any spells of its own, unless it works on it's own supernatural abilities, but then you really should define "magical effect" a bit better.
    magical effect are defined in the I'll do that later desription.

    You'll do that later looks ok.

    I forgot about that is essentially a "Hell Naw" button, which is always a nice capstone, so well done with that. Nothing to say there.

    In conclusion, the class looks very good, but does need one or two clarifications. Other than that, great stuff.
    Thank you very much for the peach it's appreciate. here's one for your class:

    Requirement: Seem fine.

    Skills: might want to add concentration so they can avoid Aoo and spellcraft so they can recognize spells.

    Spells: A barbarian class that grant spell his original I admit. You have a few pronoun problem switching betwen they and you in the middle of a phrase.
    I like the spell list very thematic.
    As written a timebreaker cannot cast stiil spells in rage. Is that intentional ?

    Lightning Fast Fury: Nice simple boost.

    Steal the Years: Very cool ability. A straight debuff.

    Speedy Steps: Okay.

    Timecrush Rebuke: I like this one. you may just need to specify the target of the Aoo because as written they can use on any creature within reach.

    Step through Time: You need to state what action is need to activate it. It default as a standard action but it may better as an immediate or swift action. Also can you use while raging ?

    Lightning Speed: Very cool ability that.

    Timebreaker Strike: Awesome ability. very fitting as a capstone.

    Conclusions: a very cool class that just need a little polishing. The first few abilities seem a little weak but you do get spellcasting so it compensate.

    Edit: Ninjad by Thrice Dead cat, response:

    Quote Originally Posted by Thrice Dead Cat View Post
    As much as I should be doing my own PrC, I'll go ahead and give it a crack!
    pm me when it's done I'll peach it.

    Fluff seems nice. I always shriek a little at seeing classes that "give benefits" to spellcasters without actually giving casting, though.
    That's on purpose, with spellcasting it would be too powerful and I like the idea of a class that can either help or hinder caster.

    The "See do that later" should probably go to a side bar, since I noticed you mention what these "effects" are in the first class feature. For language just change it to "See the following sidebar for what counts as a 'harmful effect.'"
    Done.

    Other than that, entry requirements are easy. For noncasters, the easiest entry requirements are probably Factotum. Martial Adepts could also sneak in as could anyone who throws a feat to a Diamond Mind maneuver.

    Class list and skill points per level fit. As you require Knowledge (The Planes) to enter, it really should be a class skill. Having requirement X not being a class skill really, really bugs me.
    I add Knowledge (the planes) at the last minute and just forgot to add it to the skill list.

    As an aside, from an editing perspective, this needs some more spaces in it. Maybe also a sidebar, but whatever. There's a lot there, as far as rules text goes, so it makes it somewhat hard to read.
    done.

    You also have some languages issues with plurals. If ya want, send me a PM and I could hunt those down for ya! (I seem to recall you saying you're a non-native speaker.)
    I would be gratfull thanks, I'll send it soon.

    First level portion of it is rather minor, but not bad. It's the meat of the class and pseudo-DR as a class feature is rather nice. Maybe also allow "healing" spells to be delayed, too, if you delayed damage - or at least mention what happens with that interaction as with the Crusader's Delayed Damage Pool.
    You can use "You don't need that yet" on yourself so it's covered. I'll think about the healing delayed damage issue. I'm conflict about that, fluff wise I'm not sure it fit.

    Third level portion is nice. Because of the long list, I think it should be in a sidebar, but that's just me.
    Done.

    Fifth level looks a little odd at first because it seems contradictory without looking down to 7th level. Not sure how you could clean up the wording to make it "flow," but this is otherwise a nice feature.
    I'm not clear on what you mean about contradictory.

    Seventh level looks a bit light, as a lot of "magical effects" include ability damage (that and - by all other sources - (SU) abilities are "magical"). I understand wanting to delay ability damage as its own thing separate from 5th level, however. I just personally feel it should be thrown in with the 5th level ability, but by 10th level (at its earliest), I want to delay ability damage rather than waiting till 12th level when I could have been facing shadows since level 3. The fact that this is the only class feature at level 7 also just sort of "irks" me, so take that into consideration.

    Ninth level is a nice growth from the rest of the ability. It still doesn't stop (most) maneuvers nor does it prevent other, nondamage (EX) abilities.

    If I were to do this, I'd merge the 5th and 7th level abilities, make the 9th the 7th level ability and come up with a new "No, wait guys!" capstone for "I'll do that later!"
    i understand but the problem is coming up with a new finish for "I'll do that later"
    Plus fluf-wise i'm not sure how to combine delaying magical effect and ability damage.

    I like this! It competes with using the same action as "I'll do that later!" which is bad, but the system doesn't really handle multiple swift/immediate actions per turn.
    No choice there, yes. But it does mean that you need choose betwen preventing healing an enemy or preventing effect on yourself. It's a tactical choice.

    I love this class feature. It reminds me of Spate's old "Clerics of the mundane" and its large "NO!" to all sorts of weird voodoos. Most casters may do well against the Will Save just due to 7 levels of good will save. Same goes to monsters with good will saves, but hot dang! I love the idea of this ability turning everyone's tricks into pseudo-breath weapons.
    Glad you like it.

    I like this. The table is super useful, even if it is a lot to read (again, "time" does that to things). Overall, a nice way to punish "mundanes" like the casters in the same way that "Take it easy" does. I do not envy you for having to make the table, though. The note also helps, since it seems the idea isn't to out-and-out say "no" to basic attacks, but rather just to limit them to one (given the base fighter example). Using percentages does that well.


    I love this! It's a lot like "White Raven Tactics" reversed. The language needs some work, as it is initially confusing, but, I do love the idea about it. Reading everything up until this point makes the class feel like an odd, non-caster debuffer. The fact that it screws with the "rocket tag" feel of higher level DND helps, in my opinion, too!
    How would you word it to make it less confusing ? I had a hard time with it.
    Geckoking suggest a save for that do you think it's need ?

    Another solid class feature. It's an odd sort of "enabler" ability, but not bad. You still have the "see do that later" in there, as a hold over, but otherwise, nice!

    You need to clean up the wording some what, but, overall, I like the idea of extending some buff spells and the like by this ability by just a little more. Rather useful, honestly, as it can act like 1/4 of an extend spell up to three times per day.
    I'm not sure how I can clean up the wording even more. As you said calss feature base on time need detail.

    Love this! It feels "late," but it is incredibly powerful. It needs an action listing, as it seems a bit ambiguous. My gut says it is a non-action and happens with along with I'll do that later, which is fine. The fact that it says "you must still be effected" bugs me, as it means a Procrastinator can't use it to "dispel" some sort of buff, but I think that may be intentional, simply due to being able to stop all sorts of debuffs itself is rather, well, powerful.
    I'll precise the action. It's only the delay magical area effect that need the procrastinator to be among the target otherwise it can be use on any effect. I'll try to work on the wording.

    I like this! Once per encounter, X doesn't happen. Really good capstone, really appropriate, too!
    Thnaks.

    Overall, this very much feels like "Madfoam Rager: the Class!" And I like that.
    I don't get the reference and I don't see the link with a rager ?

    I feel like I'm going to tell a lot of people in my PEACHes to "cut down on words," because, let's not kid ourselves, time is a bitch to think about in the context of a game. And so help me god if I see more than one "re-wind a round" abilities in a single class. On paper, they are a cute idea, but, as far as actual gaming goes, they can be nigh-impossible to actually run.
    You're so right, which is why I didn't go with that sort of thing.

    Thank you very much.
    Last edited by zagan; 2011-11-09 at 09:30 AM.
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  8. - Top - End - #278
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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Can someone peach my Watchmaker, please?
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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Quote Originally Posted by Sgt. Cookie View Post
    Can someone peach my Watchmaker, please?
    The skills are a bit awkward in the requirements. Why have both Craft (clockwork) and Profession (watchmaker)? The latter seems unnecessary here. (Also, perhaps you should unbold the parts after the : marks.)

    You could replace the Profession ranks with a base Will save requirement instead (+4, for example).

    Knowledge (history) seems like it should be in the class skills... could also be used for requirements. 4 ranks maybe?

    Check the Time's adding ranks in Spot and Listen together seems awkward... and some people use Perception instead. I find it hard to imagine how you'd "listen" for it, though seeing it I'd believe. Perhaps instead give a scaling bonus to such checks to percieve disturbances in Time?

    The Diplomacy bonus from Know Thy Future is flavourful, I like that.

    The swordcane is kind of awkward and seems rather just thrown in there, to be honest. Plus it only really synergizes with regaining your Str and Dex.


    That all being said, while very flavourful, it is really, really weak. At level 15 you are just a little good at fighting with what's basically a short sword and you can make creatures shaken (it isn't stated that it is a Mind-Affecting effect btw, but I think all fear effects are, right?).
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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    The list of condition is indicated in the description of the I'll do that later ability. I'll add a spoiler with the list to make thing clearer.
    Ok then.

    It doesn't seem that strong to me for two reason first it's a Will save and spellcaster generally have very good will save and second you need to choose careffuly, it's not always obvious which creature can cast spell.
    I'd agree on the first point, but the second point is a bit iffy. 9/10, you know who's throwing the spells around. Anyway, you do have a point.

    My first instinct was straith number of attack (1,2,3) but I realise that monster with lot of attack would less affected so I decided to go with a percentage.
    I didn't think of it that way. Well, it is certainly "fairer", if that's the correct way of describing it.

    I did forgot the save for the first save but there none for not so soon because you target the effect itself not the creature. (well it's the logic anyway) Do you think it really need a save ?
    Not really. I just noticed it was the only ability without a save.

    magical effect are defined in the I'll do that later desription.
    Gotcha.

    Thank you very much for the peach it's appreciate. here's one for your class:
    No problem, and why thank you.

    Requirement: Seem fine.

    Skills: might want to add concentration so they can avoid Aoo and spellcraft so they can recognize spells.
    Got it.

    Spells: A barbarian class that grant spell his original I admit. You have a few pronoun problem switching betwen they and you in the middle of a phrase.
    I like the spell list very thematic.
    As written a timebreaker cannot cast stiil spells in rage. Is that intentional ?
    The pronoun thing is copypasta that wasn't cooked properly. And yes, it should be able to cast while in a rage.

    Lightning Fast Fury: Nice simple boost.

    Steal the Years: Very cool ability. A straight debuff.

    Speedy Steps: Okay.
    Snazzy.

    Timecrush Rebuke: I like this one. you may just need to specify the target of the Aoo because as written they can use on any creature within reach.
    Will do.

    Step through Time: You need to state what action is need to activate it. It default as a standard action but it may better as an immediate or swift action. Also can you use while raging ?
    1. Immediate Action. Is meant to be a panic button.
    2. I guess they can be ragin' and hidin'.

    Lightning Speed: Very cool ability that.

    Timebreaker Strike: Awesome ability. very fitting as a capstone.
    Snazzy + 1.

    Conclusions: a very cool class that just need a little polishing. The first few abilities seem a little weak but you do get spellcasting so it compensate.
    And I shall polish away. Many thanks!
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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Quote Originally Posted by Morph Bark View Post
    The skills are a bit awkward in the requirements. Why have both Craft (clockwork) and Profession (watchmaker)? The latter seems unnecessary here.
    Got rid of Craft (Clockwork). I kept watchmaker as it is an integral part of the fluff.

    (Also, perhaps you should unbold the parts after the : marks.)
    Done.

    You could replace the Profession ranks with a base Will save requirement instead (+4, for example).
    Added the will save, replaced Craft (Clockwork)

    Knowledge (history) seems like it should be in the class skills... could also be used for requirements. 4 ranks maybe?
    Added

    Check the Time's adding ranks in Spot and Listen together seems awkward... and some people use Perception instead. I find it hard to imagine how you'd "listen" for it, though seeing it I'd believe. Perhaps instead give a scaling bonus to such checks to percieve disturbances in Time?
    Changed to Spot OR Perception. Added scaling bonus.

    The Diplomacy bonus from Know Thy Future is flavourful, I like that.
    Thanks.

    The swordcane is kind of awkward and seems rather just thrown in there, to be honest. Plus it only really synergizes with regaining your Str and Dex.
    Changed to light and martial weapons.

    That all being said, while very flavourful, it is really, really weak. At level 15 you are just a little good at fighting with what's basically a short sword and you can make creatures shaken (it isn't stated that it is a Mind-Affecting effect btw, but I think all fear effects are, right?).
    Changed "Sword Cane fighting" to be useable on a much more varied scale, as well as giving a bonus to shaken creatures.

    Also, clarified that it is a mind effecting ability.
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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    I don't get the reference and I don't see the link with a rager ?
    Mad Foam Rager is a feat from... PHB II? which lets someone in a rage delay an effect for a round. I had some hydra barbarians use it to delay waves of exhaustion from the party's dread necro so they could stomp more face. It's pretty cool.

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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Well, my Stillsword is pretty much done (the "pretty much" comes from the fact that I have yet to add the Permeabilities, which are...kind of 20 ).

    Either way, if any of you would like to PEACH I'll gladly return the favor.

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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Quote Originally Posted by Glimbur View Post
    Mad Foam Rager is a feat from... PHB II? which lets someone in a rage delay an effect for a round. I had some hydra barbarians use it to delay waves of exhaustion from the party's dread necro so they could stomp more face. It's pretty cool.
    Ha, okay. I thoughit was a cultural reference. I can see the similarity indeed, thanks for the info.
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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    I've finished the basics of my entry, the Antecedent Investigator. I would really appreciate some feedback, particularly of power level.
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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    Ha, okay. I thoughit was a cultural reference. I can see the similarity indeed, thanks for the info.
    Sorry about that! I'll also get to the editing job soon, too, between PEACHes.


    Alright, so it's time I re-enter the ring! I've got the vast majority of the crunch done. It feels like I'm bordering on "words words words..." with a few things, but space-time does that to me.

    I've got a few things to finish up with the class. I feel like dropping a Fission or Body Outside Body like ability down at level 7. Level 9 needs something, and "Living Nexus" is going to be equal parts teleportation and time travel gone mad, maybe with a pinch of Fission 2: Temporal Boogaloo.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wings of Peace View Post
    "See these cookies? Note how while good they taste sort of bland. Now try these, they're the same cookies but with chocolate chips added. Notice how with the second batch we expended slightly more ingredients but dramatically enhanced the flavor? That's metamagic."
    Quote Originally Posted by Doc Roc View Post
    Seriously, can we kill this misconception now? A wizard is never late, nor is he early. He shops for precisely what he means to.


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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    There's precedent for using homebrew as the base class our prestige class is aimed at, right? I'm wondering if I can use Knight of Time as my basis.
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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Curses! My design notes were all on a .txt that I didn't save (because I make bad decisions) and the power went out. Now I have to start from scratch + what I remember.

    I'm also surprised no one beat me to the low-hanging fruit of "time pirate."

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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Quote Originally Posted by Derjuin View Post
    There's precedent for using homebrew as the base class our prestige class is aimed at, right? I'm wondering if I can use Knight of Time as my basis.
    People have thrown down PrCs for homebrewed works in the past. Generally, I find I PEACH them less often simply because I feel the need to also get a feel for the other homebrew.

    Quote Originally Posted by TSED View Post
    Curses! My design notes were all on a .txt that I didn't save (because I make bad decisions) and the power went out. Now I have to start from scratch + what I remember.

    I'm also surprised no one beat me to the low-hanging fruit of "time pirate."
    Yo ho ho and a bottle of time?
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wings of Peace View Post
    "See these cookies? Note how while good they taste sort of bland. Now try these, they're the same cookies but with chocolate chips added. Notice how with the second batch we expended slightly more ingredients but dramatically enhanced the flavor? That's metamagic."
    Quote Originally Posted by Doc Roc View Post
    Seriously, can we kill this misconception now? A wizard is never late, nor is he early. He shops for precisely what he means to.


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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Got a vague idea here, but since it is built around "Crippling Drawbacks to get Awesome Abilities" (in that order of logical thought of how the idea occurred to me) it might be nearly impossible to balance.

    Basically, it is a time-traveler who HAS to cover his tracks to prevent himself from vanishing from existence just before he undertook the action that left too much of a trace, but who has a lot of abilities (Modify Memory, Make Whole, the ability to deal subdual damage with any attack whether magical or mundane) to help him along with that.

    How worth trying do people think that might be?
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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Quote Originally Posted by DracoDei View Post
    Got a vague idea here, but since it is built around "Crippling Drawbacks to get Awesome Abilities" (in that order of logical thought of how the idea occurred to me) it might be nearly impossible to balance.

    Basically, it is a time-traveler who HAS to cover his tracks to prevent himself from vanishing from existence just before he undertook the action that left too much of a trace, but who has a lot of abilities (Modify Memory, Make Whole, the ability to deal subdual damage with any attack whether magical or mundane) to help him along with that.

    How worth trying do people think that might be?
    Just ramp up the difficulty of covering his tracks as he goes along. The gov't isn't going to bust out the national guard for a dude who dined and dashed, and the government IS going to break out the national guard for a criminal who stole a military helicopter and is currently doing strafing runs on civilians. Give the prestige class more tools but every tool makes it more difficult to get away with using.
    Last edited by TSED; 2011-11-10 at 04:21 PM.

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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Quote Originally Posted by TSED View Post
    Just ramp up the difficulty of covering his tracks as he goes along.
    This part of your idea, at least, sounds like it could be very useful.
    Quote Originally Posted by TSED View Post
    The gov't isn't going to bust out the national guard for a dude who dined and dashed, and the government IS going to break out the national guard for a criminal who stole a military helicopter and is currently doing strafing runs on civilians. Give the prestige class more tools but every tool makes it more difficult to get away with using.
    Fixed the underlined word for you.
    Also, I wasn't imagining his tools as being sources of tracks but ways of covering them. Thus the selection of those abilities, rather than Haste and Time Stop and such (although they might get a bit of those too).
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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Quote Originally Posted by DracoDei View Post
    This part of your idea, at least, sounds like it could be very useful.

    Fixed the underlined word for you.
    Also, I wasn't imagining his tools as being sources of tracks but ways of covering them. Thus the selection of those abilities, rather than Haste and Time Stop and such (although they might get a bit of those too).
    Yeah, whoops, you definitely read it as intended.

    And: sure, covering tracks makes it harder to be found, but they also leave evidence. If you drown a room out in bleach, it's suspicious. If you suddenly INSIST that you were at a specific place before any investigation of a murder that night, it's suspicious. It can be something simple that requires two knowledge points to correlate ("cops find a cache of buried bodies / Jason McMurderface stops going on his weekly "hunting trips" in his truck") or it can be fairly obvious (the previously mentioned "why were the sheets bleached past usability, the walls soaked in the stuff, the floor ruined by it, and the mattress burned?").

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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Errr...
    crap...

    Chrono Legionnaire does not go as planned, and many people made "time knights"

    Scrapping idea in favor of a new one-Time Thief...


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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    I'm thankful that ErrantX chose this subject for this contest, especially as it coincides with possibly being the last PrC contest I'll be able to compete in for a while.

    Such ideas I have.

    It will be SO DELICIOUS.
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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Why last for a while? something happened?

    And yes, I agree this is a badass subject for a PrC contest. such a flavorful power source with so many stories about, yet no real integration into DnD...


    Quote Originally Posted by Cormag81 View Post
    2117: No matter how good a debater I am out of character there is no way to logically get out of falling after your paladin kills his patron god.

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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Quote Originally Posted by boomwolf View Post
    Why last for a while? something happened?

    And yes, I agree this is a badass subject for a PrC contest. such a flavorful power source with so many stories about, yet no real integration into DnD...
    Actually, 3.5 has some love for time magic. There are some articles in regards to the Forgotten Realms setting with a few time spells. The Legends of the Twins Dragonlance source book has a bunch of time spells in it, but in regards to PrCs, "time" is kind of rare. Offhand, the only thing that comes to mind is the Swiftblade.



    On a related note, the Temporal Warrior is mechanically done. I still want to hammer out the fluff behind it, though. I may change the name to "Obsidian Warden," as the main class feature is Obsidian Gateway and its weird teleport-y-ness. I'm worried I gave it too much (and I'm tempted about throwing down an "Advanced Learning" class feature for time spells), so a PEACH would be greatly appreciated.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wings of Peace View Post
    "See these cookies? Note how while good they taste sort of bland. Now try these, they're the same cookies but with chocolate chips added. Notice how with the second batch we expended slightly more ingredients but dramatically enhanced the flavor? That's metamagic."
    Quote Originally Posted by Doc Roc View Post
    Seriously, can we kill this misconception now? A wizard is never late, nor is he early. He shops for precisely what he means to.


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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Quote Originally Posted by Thrice Dead Cat View Post
    On a related note, the Temporal Warrior is mechanically done. I still want to hammer out the fluff behind it, though. I may change the name to "Obsidian Warden," as the main class feature is Obsidian Gateway and its weird teleport-y-ness. I'm worried I gave it too much (and I'm tempted about throwing down an "Advanced Learning" class feature for time spells), so a PEACH would be greatly appreciated.
    I'm here, I waiting just for that.
    Peach for the Temporal Warrior

    Fluff: Short and to the point, I didn't do better so no comment.

    Prereq: Seem fine, why the exotic weapon ? I don't see the link with time.
    Somantic weaponry I can see because your a warrior and a mage but not the exotic weapon.
    Side note: A source for non-core stuff is always nice, somantic weaponry in that case, CW no ?
    Also various adaptation would be really cool. Psionic notably.

    Skills, Bab, Saves: A good chassis with full bab and two good saves.

    Weapon proficiency: Exotic weapon or armor again, still why ?

    Transtemporal Pouches: An original ability, not sure how often it could come up in game but nice.
    demises =/= dismiss

    Eyes-in-time: Where's that spell ?

    Spellcasting: 3 lost level, you'll need some good ability to compensate, but from a quick look it seem fair.

    Obsidian Gateways: That seem like a really nice idea, even if more teleporation based than time based.
    2nd level: the wording about making ranged attack isn't very clear. Does both you and the target need to be adjacent of a gate to use a ranged attack, only one of you ? "as long as he (and others) are adjacent to one of the gateways"
    Who's "other" the target ?
    4th level: Now your thinking with portal !
    How do you count the number of square of movement when passing throug the gateway ? Do you count the square that the gateway occupy, do you appear adjacent to them ?
    The second part also confirm that before that the target of ranged attack need to be adjacent. So earlier wording need clarification.
    6th level: A nice idea, but the limit to once per round is a little limitating.
    For example you want to attack you'll choose the bonus (a free action) and then if your foe attack you apply the penalty. But then, before your turn, one of your ally want to attack your foe through the gateway too and it take the penalty (and probably miss). Would it be too strong if you could instead choose the bonus/penalty depending on which creature attack ? (allies gain a +1 or enemies a -11)
    Transplanar warrior ?
    8th level: Instant gateway.
    I'm not sure allowing other creature to travel through your gateway is such a boost, for your allies it's nice but it allow your foe to reach you too. and if you want to prevent it, it'll eat your immediate action with no guarantee of succes.

    The idea is really cool but I think it need a little clarification/simplification.

    Mobile Spellcasting:: Again source ? That's the spring attack feat of spellcaster no ? If so it's nice to have and fit the movement theme of the class.

    Unstable Passage: As written you can only use flicker as a standard action because you don't say it's an immediate action like the original version so it default to standard.

    Temporal Shift: I see what you mean but it's confusing. You use the word target multiple time but it seem to refere to yourself ? In the same phrase you use both you and target. You shift from you to him in the middle.
    You need to say what happen if a creature attack the shadow ? Can it even see it ? (strongly implied but i'm sure) Can it see the difference betwen you and the shadow ?
    Very confusing.

    Temporal Regeneration: You dedouble yourself but it's called regeneration ?
    Insteed of spliting power point/spell slot/other daily ability why not just say that you and your duplicate share the same pool of ability and if one is used it dissapear from the pool and then the other cannot use it. (Yes fission does it like that but I don't really see the point)
    Also you contradicte yourself if the ressource are split then you cannot have a paradox because each "you" posses half the ressource and can spend them freely because the other does not have acces to thies half of the ressource.

    In case of paradox what's the percentage of chance that an inevitable is create and what sort of inevitable it is ?

    A few example of negligent use of time magic would be great.

    Lot of confusion for this ability.

    Delayed Trek: A delay effect, that remind me of something.
    You need to stat the type of effect (Su probably).
    The first part is clear no problem there. After reareading it no it's not.
    What sort of action is need to delay effect , do you decid when you create the gateway ? As an immediate action when an effect try to pass through ?

    The second part less more so, why it's harder to reduce the delay than to extend it ? Shouldn't it be the opposite ?
    Also as written you can delay an effect as long as the gateway exist as long as you spend a swift action every few round.
    What happen if the gateway dissapear before the end of the delay ? Do delayed creature dissapear ?
    Finally the example is weird, what's the benefit of increasing the delay effect as an immediate action when an effect try to pass through ? (theory: because the delay is set when you create the gateway but i'm not sure)

    Living Nexus: That's one very good capstone ! No comment apart from those of temporal regeneration.

    Fluff: No completed but the begining is interesting.

    Conclusions: Hum, yeah. The ideas behind the class and it's abilities are great ! But it is really confusing and sometimes incomplete (eyes-in-times) I admit I'm a little dissapoint because normally your work is top notch. Still you time to finish so I'm sure that you'll get it right before the end of the contest.
    Also a lot of your ability require swift or immediate action, a very limited ressource.
    One last thing that may be more important, the class seem to be more teleportation based than times based, two abilities really fluffed to be link with time (temporal regenration and delayed trek, plus perhaps eyes in time). Seem a little light when it's supposed to be the central them of the class. Maybe it's just me.

    I think I was a little harsh and I hope I didn't offend you, but I know you are capable of much more.
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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    I'm here, I waiting just for that.
    Peach for the Temporal Warrior
    Thanks very much, zagan!

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    Fluff: Short and to the point, I didn't do better so no comment.
    I'm planning on adding more to it, but I figured crunch > fluff for the sake of the contest.

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    Prereq: Seem fine, why the exotic weapon ? I don't see the link with time.
    Somantic weaponry I can see because your a warrior and a mage but not the exotic weapon.
    Side note: A source for non-core stuff is always nice, somantic weaponry in that case, CW no ?
    Also various adaptation would be really cool. Psionic notably.
    I'm editing the class now to cite non-core sources. The Exotic Weapon thing is partially there as a feat tax, but also to encourage things other than just human from entering it.

    Skills, Bab, Saves: A good chassis with full bab and two good saves.

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    Weapon proficiency: Exotic weapon or armor again, still why ?
    Weird stuff exists, and I mentally have the image of most Temporal Warriors either being proud of their race (Elves using Thinblades) or crazy humans.

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    Transtemporal Pouches: An original ability, not sure how often it could come up in game but nice.
    demises =/= dismiss
    Thanks, both for the compliment and the catch on the word.

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    Eyes-in-time: Where's that spell ?
    In the word document I was making this class. It'll be up shortly.

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    Spellcasting: 3 lost level, you'll need some good ability to compensate, but from a quick look it seem fair.
    The idea was to hammer spellcasting a bit, much like the Swiftblade.

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    Obsidian Gateways: That seem like a really nice idea, even if more teleporation based than time based.
    Yeah, that's mostly because I kept thinking of space-time and "space=time" while making this class. It's a little forced, admittedly.

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    2nd level: the wording about making ranged attack isn't very clear. Does both you and the target need to be adjacent of a gate to use a ranged attack, only one of you ? "as long as he (and others) are adjacent to one of the gateways"
    Thanks. Originally, I was thinking that ranged attacks should be a later-level ability, but I never really settled on the language for it. I'll try to clean that up.


    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    Who's "other" the target ?
    4th level: Now your thinking with portal !
    How do you count the number of square of movement when passing throug the gateway ? Do you count the square that the gateway occupy, do you appear adjacent to them ?
    I added some clarification to it. Let me know if it still seems "off."

    The second part also confirm that before that the target of ranged attack need to be adjacent. So earlier wording need clarification.

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    6th level: A nice idea, but the limit to once per round is a little limitating.
    For example you want to attack you'll choose the bonus (a free action) and then if your foe attack you apply the penalty. But then, before your turn, one of your ally want to attack your foe through the gateway too and it take the penalty (and probably miss). Would it be too strong if you could instead choose the bonus/penalty depending on which creature attack ? (allies gain a +1 or enemies a -11)
    Transplanar warrior ?
    Originally, I was going to do just that, but it felt too strong that way. I may go back to that method, though. I mean, it is your class feature after all.


    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    8th level: Instant gateway.
    I'm not sure allowing other creature to travel through your gateway is such a boost, for your allies it's nice but it allow your foe to reach you too. and if you want to prevent it, it'll eat your immediate action with no guarantee of succes.

    The idea is really cool but I think it need a little clarification/simplification.
    Fair enough. If I can get some more opinions, I may go back to my first reaction, which was to have the gateway "penalties" be dependent on allies/enemies. I may also change it so that the 8th level ability requires a Will Save (DC probably 10+.5PrC level+Key modifier) to use, failure meaning that an enemy cannot use that gateway for the rest of the day.

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    Mobile Spellcasting:: Again source ? That's the spring attack feat of spellcaster no ? If so it's nice to have and fit the movement theme of the class.
    It basically is the Spring Attack of spellcasting. Source is Complete Adventurer, around page ~100.

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    Unstable Passage: As written you can only use flicker as a standard action because you don't say it's an immediate action like the original version so it default to standard.
    Noted and modified to be as an immediate action.

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    Temporal Shift: I see what you mean but it's confusing. You use the word target multiple time but it seem to refere to yourself ? In the same phrase you use both you and target. You shift from you to him in the middle.
    You need to say what happen if a creature attack the shadow ? Can it even see it ? (strongly implied but i'm sure) Can it see the difference betwen you and the shadow ?
    Very confusing.
    Again, this was a case where I was thinking "what if you use some weird teleport spell on an ally." I decided to just change it to "you" to save on confusion. I also added a clause that states that enemies can tell which one is "real."

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    Temporal Regeneration: You dedouble yourself but it's called regeneration ?
    Insteed of spliting power point/spell slot/other daily ability why not just say that you and your duplicate share the same pool of ability and if one is used it dissapear from the pool and then the other cannot use it. (Yes fission does it like that but I don't really see the point)
    Also you contradicte yourself if the ressource are split then you cannot have a paradox because each "you" posses half the ressource and can spend them freely because the other does not have acces to thies half of the ressource.

    In case of paradox what's the percentage of chance that an inevitable is create and what sort of inevitable it is ?

    A few example of negligent use of time magic would be great.

    Lot of confusion for this ability.
    I call it "Regeneration," because I kept thinking about Doctor Who while making this class feature.

    I copied a lot of text from the Fission power, which is probably why there's so much confusion. I changed the wording so that it is now just a vague "shares" to allow for Paradox events.

    I also added some more examples of that would draw attention from Inevitables.

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    Delayed Trek: A delay effect, that remind me of something.
    You need to stat the type of effect (Su probably).
    The first part is clear no problem there. After reareading it no it's not.
    What sort of action is need to delay effect , do you decid when you create the gateway ? As an immediate action when an effect try to pass through ?

    The second part less more so, why it's harder to reduce the delay than to extend it ? Shouldn't it be the opposite ?
    Also as written you can delay an effect as long as the gateway exist as long as you spend a swift action every few round.
    What happen if the gateway dissapear before the end of the delay ? Do delayed creature dissapear ?
    Finally the example is weird, what's the benefit of increasing the delay effect as an immediate action when an effect try to pass through ? (theory: because the delay is set when you create the gateway but i'm not sure)
    Not going to lie, delaying things screams time magic, and I like how the procrastinator did it!

    I'm overhauling this a bit to try to avoid confusion. Take another look at it, once I get the revision up for another round of PEACHes.

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    Living Nexus: That's one very good capstone ! No comment apart from those of temporal regeneration.
    I was worried I overdid it, but twice per day getting basically two different ~7th level abilities doesn't seem too bad.

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    Fluff: No completed but the begining is interesting.
    I plan on getting more of that done in the near future!

    Quote Originally Posted by zagan View Post
    Conclusions: Hum, yeah. The ideas behind the class and it's abilities are great ! But it is really confusing and sometimes incomplete (eyes-in-times) I admit I'm a little dissapoint because normally your work is top notch. Still you time to finish so I'm sure that you'll get it right before the end of the contest.
    Also a lot of your ability require swift or immediate action, a very limited ressource.
    One last thing that may be more important, the class seem to be more teleportation based than times based, two abilities really fluffed to be link with time (temporal regenration and delayed trek, plus perhaps eyes in time). Seem a little light when it's supposed to be the central them of the class. Maybe it's just me.

    I think I was a little harsh and I hope I didn't offend you, but I know you are capable of much more.
    A lot of the confusion comes from me being so unsure of just how I wanted things to work. I remember being confused beyond all belief trying to think how I should word (and work) Obsidian Gateways when I first made the ability. Using swift actions and immediate actions was done somewhat intentionally, as I worry that just having everything be on all the time is "too good" or "too strong." My revisions remove a lot of them, but I still want people using the Temporal Warrior to be conservative with their swift and immediate actions.

    I'm also worried that I didn't focus enough on TIME, especially considering how late the time-related abilities show up in the class. In that case, I'm okay with withdrawing the entry from the competition, because it doesn't "fit."
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    Default Re: GitP PrC Contest Chat Thread IV

    Quote Originally Posted by Thrice Dead Cat View Post
    I'm editing the class now to cite non-core sources. The Exotic Weapon thing is partially there as a feat tax, but also to encourage things other than just human from entering it.

    Weird stuff exists, and I mentally have the image of most Temporal Warriors either being proud of their race (Elves using Thinblades) or crazy humans.
    Yeah, I see what you mean but to me it feel like it come out of nowhere. In addition your obsidian gate already increase your reach so the most comonly (ab)used exotic weapon become even more powerful. Your choice.

    In the word document I was making this class. It'll be up shortly.
    I've seen you've post it, it seem fine and really time based so that help.

    Yeah, that's mostly because I kept thinking of space-time and "space=time" while making this class. It's a little forced, admittedly.
    A little, but fluff is mutable. You could say that you when teleporting you tarvel trhough time instead of the astral plane.

    Thanks. Originally, I was thinking that ranged attacks should be a later-level ability, but I never really settled on the language for it. I'll try to clean that up.
    The new wording for the 2nd level detail is much clearer now.

    I added some clarification to it. Let me know if it still seems "off."
    That too is clearer.

    Originally, I was going to do just that, but it felt too strong that way. I may go back to that method, though. I mean, it is your class feature after all.
    I think you should, perhaps reducing just a little the penalty to compensate ? A -6 is largely enough.

    Fair enough. If I can get some more opinions, I may go back to my first reaction, which was to have the gateway "penalties" be dependent on allies/enemies. I may also change it so that the 8th level ability requires a Will Save (DC probably 10+.5PrC level+Key modifier) to use, failure meaning that an enemy cannot use that gateway for the rest of the day.
    I like the idea of will save.

    I call it "Regeneration," because I kept thinking about Doctor Who while making this class feature.
    Ha I didn't catch the reference.

    I copied a lot of text from the Fission power, which is probably why there's so much confusion. I changed the wording so that it is now just a vague "shares" to allow for Paradox events.
    Now it's clearer, I doubt paradox from overusing spell slot will come often but it's nice that you add a sort of drawback.

    Not going to lie, delaying things screams time magic, and I like how the procrastinator did it!

    I'm overhauling this a bit to try to avoid confusion. Take another look at it, once I get the revision up for another round of PEACHes.
    Much better now.

    A lot of the confusion comes from me being so unsure of just how I wanted things to work. I remember being confused beyond all belief trying to think how I should word (and work) Obsidian Gateways when I first made the ability. Using swift actions and immediate actions was done somewhat intentionally, as I worry that just having everything be on all the time is "too good" or "too strong." My revisions remove a lot of them, but I still want people using the Temporal Warrior to be conservative with their swift and immediate actions.
    It's much better now and I like the removed old age thing you add.

    I'm also worried that I didn't focus enough on TIME, especially considering how late the time-related abilities show up in the class. In that case, I'm okay with withdrawing the entry from the competition, because it doesn't "fit."
    It's fine as I said fluff is mutable.

    EDIT: I've got an idea that you could use, could be some sort of drawback or with a little creativity a could useful in itself.
    My idea is that X amoutn of time (10 minutes ?) after using temporal regeneration the temporal warrior disappear for the same number of round that he used the ability and he then reappear in the same position.
    What do you think ?
    Last edited by zagan; 2011-11-14 at 11:22 AM.
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