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  1. - Top - End - #31
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    Default Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting

    Quote Originally Posted by TheCountAlucard View Post
    The following Snippet has been spruced up from my memories of a game I played years ago. Enjoy.

    Tournament
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    The third round of Kokage's tournament was underway; the last match would be between Shichirou and Sah Mi. Shichirou had been unable to observe his opponent in the previous rounds; the Immaculate had kept him too busy. He still hadn't fully healed from that fight, either; his lungs still felt as though they were burning.

    Shichirou first stripped to the waist, then gulped some water. The Flaming Arena was packed, and Kokage seemed pleased. As the Solar stepped into the ring, he saw Sah Mi do the same. His opponent was dark-skinned and as rugged as stone. Shichirou bowed, and Sah Mi returned his gesture. The bronze-skinned god stood, and with his proclamation, the match began.

    "Fight!"

    Shichirou surged forward, charging his opponent, throwing three punches. Two landed, but Sah Mi did not flinch; Shichirou observed with bemusement that the stony floor of the arena seemed to show some damage. Rather than retaliate, though, Sah Mi dropped prone, touching his forehead to the floor, before chunks of the rock rose up to cover his body completely.

    "Interesting tactic," Shichirou said, and then laced his fingers together and hammered at Sah Mi's back. The force of his blow once more rippled down the foe's body and cracked the floor. Sah Mi stood, and grabbed Shichirou in a stony bear-hug. The brawler attempted to stand his ground, but his foe now towered over him, and so Shichirou was lifted off his feet.

    "Patient Rockslide taught me well." Sah Mi began to squeeze the struggling Shichirou with his monstrous arms. His grip was stronger than a vice; the stone itself was actually crumbling from the force. Shichirou's breath left him, but he was not injured; his moment of invulnerability over, his caste mark began to shine on his forehead.

    The Dawn Caste continued to struggle against Sah Mi; finally he slipped free of his foe's embrace and fell to the floor. He unleashed another series of rapid-fire blows at the earthen-armored man, channeling the pain in his hands to fuel a fierce, bellowing kiai. Sah Mi shrugged off the blows and lifted Shichirou again, pinned the brawler's arms to his sides, and squeezed harder.

    Shichirou's caste mark burned brighter as Sah Mi squeezed; his invulnerability would soon fail. Shichirou suddenly twisted and slammed his head into Sah Mi's, causing chips of rubble to fall from the force of the impact. The martial artist tightened his grip until the cracking of ribs was audible.

    "Why won't you go down?" he thundered.

    "YOU FIRST!" shouted Shichirou, channeling all his strength into another headbutt. This time, it shattered through Sah Mi's stone armor, which began to crumble into gravel as he fell. Shichirou pulled himself to his feet, and for the first time, was able to hear the roaring of the crowd around him as they cheered his victory.

    Letting out a ragged breath, Shichirou looked to his unconcious opponent. "Patient Rockslide did teach you well."
    Cool story, did you pull off a 3 dot stunt in that fight? I'd guess you pulled a 2 dot ones at least.
    Quote Originally Posted by flabort View Post
    Burnheart, thanks to you, everyday reality is just a little less desirable. Until this happens, I am just this much more insane.

  2. - Top - End - #32
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    Default Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting

    It was a smattering of one-and-two-die stunts.
    He understands - more than the others do, at any rate. We don't talk much, and the silence speaks
    volumes. (Thanks to Gnomish Wanderer for the Nosferatu avatar! )

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  3. - Top - End - #33
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    Default Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting

    I swear I'm working on something guys, but I'm having trouble locking it down satisfactorily. So for now, comment dump!

    @Winds
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    I like this one a lot; your voice is much stronger here. I like that you're keeping these journal entries short, not stuffing them full of exposition that would be obvious common knowledge in-character. You're doing a really good job giving just enough to tell what's going on.


    @SleepyShadow
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    Ohhhh man. It's times like that when you just want to throw an angry, blind, epic-level monk named "See Lin" at them for crimes against the nation. Or have them rescue a little girl, only to have her set them all on fire in their sleep and summon a Dire Fire Bear to eat them.

    ...was this all in the same session?


    @TheCountAlucard
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    I'm a little confused by Shichirou's invulnerability and caste mark and so on, but I feel that comes from ignorance of the system rather than your writing. Game mechanics aside, I was a little surprised to learn that his "invulnerability would soon fail" a few paragraphs after his invulnerability being "over", though. This was a very enjoyable read though; must have been an intense session.
    For people who enjoy reading or writing.

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    Formerly known as lordhenry4000

  4. - Top - End - #34
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    Default Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting

    Quote Originally Posted by lordhenry4000 View Post
    I'm a little confused by Shichirou's invulnerability and caste mark and so on, but I feel that comes from ignorance of the system rather than your writing.
    I'll try and clarify a bit, then.

    The Exalted were created by the gods to defeat the Primordials in the time before the First Age. Even then, the gods had different roles in mind for them, hence the making of different "castes." For the Solar Exalted, castes can be discerned by a usually-invisible mark on their brow that glows as they use their power.

    Shichirou is what's known as a "Dawn Caste," which were the warriors and generals, unparalleled masters of the martial disciplines of the Exalted host. The caste mark of a Dawn is that of a golden sunburst.

    Quote Originally Posted by lordhenry4000 View Post
    Game mechanics aside, I was a little surprised to learn that his "invulnerability would soon fail" a few paragraphs after his invulnerability being "over", though.
    I've rewritten it, can you tell me if it looks a little clearer now?

    Quote Originally Posted by lordhenry4000 View Post
    This was a very enjoyable read though; must have been an intense session.
    Thanks, it was.
    Last edited by TheCountAlucard; 2012-03-11 at 12:32 AM.
    He understands - more than the others do, at any rate. We don't talk much, and the silence speaks
    volumes. (Thanks to Gnomish Wanderer for the Nosferatu avatar! )

    Wanna see what all this Exalted stuff is about? Here's a primer!

  5. - Top - End - #35
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    Default Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting

    Quote Originally Posted by lordhenry4000 View Post
    ...was this all in the same session?
    The module is fairly short, so yes this all occurred in the same session.

    I had read through the module before running them through it, but the only thing that I had noticed was the Sono/Sona bit. However, I don't go out of my way to find "easter eggs", as one of my players puts it.

    Yet another snippet, this one from a session later in the campaign when one player had to leave early.

    Should We Tell the Druid?
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    Norimo Miyuka was a proud young samurai from the Crane clan, but up until now she had never been given an assignment of great import. However, that all changed when The Red Hand of Doom began to pour into her beloved homeland of Kara-Tur.

    When a wu-jen from her clan had divined that the leader of the Red Hand was searching for a ritual of some kind to attain godhood, the task had befallen Miyuka to find experienced adventurers and to assist them in whatever way she could (within reasonable decency of course, she thought to herself).

    Now she found herself a thousand miles from home, deep beneath the earth in the legendary Tomb of Horrors. Miyuka traveled in the company of the only surviving adventurers who had encountered the Red Hand and lived to tell the tale, though the tales she had heard were less than impressive. Herodrith, Tom, and Niani were hardly the bold and daring heroes she had hoped them to be, but perhaps they merely needed someone to show them the way.

    Miyuka sighed as she sat down across from her companions. The three adventurers seemed to argue among themselves quite frequently, and often about things she did not understand. In recent memory, they had argued about whether they could put wand chambers into wands, whether Niani needed a saddle to ride her animal companion, and even whether Miyuka was really wearing cloth armor or if it was actually glamoured full plate.

    The young samurai tuned them out and tried to meditate as she waited for them to resolve their argument, but an icy chill ran up her spine when she heard Herodrith mention her name.

    "Miyuka is just an expendable resource," the priest said bluntly.

    "Aye, but I doubt we'll get another sweet treat like her," Tom laughed. "Nice and tough, nice flanking partner, nice ass, nice rack, and nice blonde hair. What's not to like? You'd just hire a sweaty barbarian dude or something."

    "Barbarian? Ugh, no. I'd hire a wizard."

    "And you two wonder why no one ever wants to stay in the group," Niani grumbled.

    "I am not a resource to be cast off on a whim," Miyuka said defiantly.

    "Oh, you were paying attention?" Herodrith asked, surprised.

    "I am always aware of my surroundings," the samurai replied. "I would ask that you never refer to me as expendable again. Oh, and Tom, keep your wandering eyes to yourself lest you find them removed from your skull."

    "That's not a nice thing to do ..." Tom replied sheepishly.

    "I'm a good person, not a nice one," Miyuka said flatly.

    "You two are hopeless," Niani sighed. "Anyway, I have to go. Don't let anything bad happen, okay?"

    "No promises," Herodrith grumbled.

    "Definition of 'bad'?" Tom asked.

    "I will defend the peace of Faerun with my life," Miyuka said boldly, rising to her feet and bowing to the little halfling.

    Niani sighed, turned into an owl, and flew back the way the group had come. The three pressed on, Miyuka opting to take point, though she entrusted Tom to decide what path to follow. At length they encountered a heavily reinforced door that took several minutes to batter their way through.

    They were making good time down the hall when the floor suddenly dropped out from beneath their feet, and Miyuka found herself sliding down a steep ramp that terminated in a massive pit of lava. Thinking fast, she drew her wakizashi and plunged it into the stone ramp. She silently thanked her ancestors as the blade stuck firmly, though now she found herself dangling only a few feet above the deadly pool of lava. Not surprisingly, her two companions had saved themselves through some magical means, as they both hovered in mid-air at the top of the ramp.

    "Help me!" she cried out.

    "I can't lift her," Tom said to Herodrith.

    "You're in melee all the time," Herodrith countered.

    "Weapon Finesse, duh. What's your excuse for not getting her?"

    "You're stronger than me, and my full plate and tower shield already heavily encumber me."

    "Hey Miyuka, how much do you weigh?" Tom shouted down to her.

    "About sixty-three kilograms, but what does that have to do with anything?" Miyuka replied, puzzled.

    "Uh, can I get that in pounds?"

    "Just throw me a rope or something!"

    The two hovering adventurers looked at her as if she was a small child that had said something foolish.

    "No one has mundane items nowadays," Herodrith said reproachfully.

    "Rope and grappling hook, I remember the days," Tom laughed.

    To Miyuka's horror, the two adventurers began to lazily fly away, leaving her dangling at the edge of the pit. The heat was oppressive, and she knew that her arms would tire long before the trap reset itself.

    "I'll hire a wizard," she heard Herodrith say.

    "Why not a sorceress?" Tom's voice echoed.

    "Meh ... only a well-built one."

    "Well-built? I like the sound of that. Should we tell the druid?"

    Miyuka's heart sank when she heard the heavy iron door slam shut, finalizing her abandonment. Still, she would not give up just yet. Carefully, she drew her katana with her right hand and drove it into the stone ramp with all her might. A cold smile crept across her lips when she found the hold was firm.

    Norimo Miyuka would make it clear to Tom and Herodrith why it is unwise to abandon a samurai of the Crane clan.

  6. - Top - End - #36
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    Default Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting

    I think I detect incoming 'fun' for SleepyShadow's party.

    Thanks again for the critique, lordhenry. I'm enjoying taking it by days rather than sessions.

    Maybe I should have stuck to farming...
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    Entry three

    I wanted the glory of a true adventure.

    I'm an idiot.

    We went into the forest today. The glimmering we noticed earlier was light. Somehow, the leaves of the trees reflect it, allowing no light into the forest.

    Irthos and the dwarf...Logrim, I think?...both have the ability to perceive things without light. For myself, the invocation that grants me darksight did not function within the forest. So we had to navigate by the ability of kobolds and dwarves to see heat. Even blind, we found the beast easily enough. After a fashion. Whoever said that humanoids are the most dangerous game should try hunting this thing. Faster than sight could follow, huge, and able to breathe fire. Given the ability of the trees to reflect light, this blinded us. My eyes still hurt.

    A larger surprise was that it could talk. With us helpless, it asked what we were doing here. It was not concerned with the idea that we would try to harm it, but it thought we were trying to reach something in the forest. He agreed to guide us to it after learning our names.

    Our arrival was preordained. I've heard bards spin this type of tale, and they rarely end well.

    We emerged into a clearing where we could see properly. The beast in question was a great tiger. Substantially larger than us, and bearing the scars of many battles. We never would have stood a chance.

    The object it guarded was an immense obelisk. The great beast opened it and bid us enter.

    Now, we are to be tested. A figment of a human explained that this obelisk, which predates written history, bears the power to call upon the gods. Each contains a sword, and a stone to place it in. The person who does so can claim the land around the device as an extension of the deity's plane. And it is our task to do so. Our opponent in this race is Asmodeus. Two war-mongers that worship Tempus, a kobold who worships the god of dragons, and a devil-tainted warlock. And we are to oppose the lord of the Nine Hells.

    I hate prophecy.


    About the darkvision bit: our DM has read several books wherein natural darkvision was infrared, so our group agreed to treat it that way in-game instead of the black-and-white vision listed in the mechanics. The DM had a particular reason why warlock darkvison wouldn't work, but I didn't ask about it.
    Last edited by Winds; 2012-03-18 at 03:58 PM.

  7. - Top - End - #37
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    Default Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting

    @TheCountAlucard
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    It's much clearer now. Actually (not to be a huge pain (who am I kidding)), the first time you mention his caste mark now feels a little too expositional to me.

    ...the brawler had poured his spiritual strength into a moment of invulnerability, and so the mark of the Dawn Caste shined on his forehead.
    I think it's the "and so" that does it. Now that I think about it, that's a construction that doesn't see a lot of use outside fairy tales & the bible, which is maybe why it stands out to me. If I were to rework it I'd probably go with something like "...the brawler had poured his spiritual strength into a moment of invulnerability, the mark of the Dawn Caste shining on his forehead." I also generally prefer 'shone' as a past tense and 'shined' as a past participle, but frankly there's a lot of precedence for both words used basically interchangeably, so now I'm just being obnoxious. STOPPING NOW.


    @SleepyShadow
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    Herodrith, Tom, and Niani were hardly the bold and daring heroes she had hoped them to be, but perhaps they merely needed someone to show them the way.
    Nooooo Miyuka, nooooooooo. That way lies madness!

    "Miyuka is just an expendable resource," the priest said bluntly.
    I told you!! Run while you can!

    Miyuka opting to take point
    NOOOOOOOOO

    Norimo Miyuka would make it clear to Tom and Herodrith why it is unwise to abandon a samurai of the Crane clan.
    See if you can kill them with some mundane rope


    This was a lot of fun to read. Glad to see your party is consistent in its treatment of NPCs (I hope Miyuka doesn't get her clan involved in her retribution though; that can only end in tears). Also, I understand the reason for it ooc, but man would I be terrified of going anywhere in the ToH alone, even if I was flying and only going exactly where I'd gone before.

    Nitpick:
    Nice and tough, nice flanking partner, nice ass, nice rack, and nice blonde hair.
    Normally, lists do use commas like you do here, but since the list isn't actually part of a sentence, you need to treat each clause like a short fragment-sentence of its own, so they should be separated with semicolons instead (with the exception of the last one: "comma-and" is actually correct here, since it is an appropriate separator for independent clauses).


    @Winds
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    Minor nitpick: "For myself" is a pretty awkward way to start a sentence; "myself" really needs something to refer back to; I don't think it can stand alone in a prepended dependent clause. "Personally" or "In my case" would read better in my opinion.

    However! This is my favorite installment yet in this series. Kalach's voice has been getting steadily stronger, and with the plot starting to pick up as well, you've definitely got me hooked. This kind of "prophesied test of strength" scenario seems like just exactly the kind of thing Kalach would hate, as a guy who's just genre-savvy enough to know when he's a Pawn of Greater Forces™.


    Man, I'm a pedantic jerk when I'm supposed to be working. Forgive me!

    EDIT: Forgive me because I'm updating the archive again as we speak?

    EDIT2: I'll have a snippet for you guys soon (so someone post so I don't double-dip). I'm putting together the events of the longest single session I've ever been involved in (a little over 14 straight hours), and I've finally got the whole thing blocked out, so expect the first chapter of that story sometime in the next day or two.
    Last edited by Dr Bwaa; 2012-03-14 at 11:02 AM.
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    Default Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting

    *insert thing to say here*

    As requested!

    The 'for myself' grammar bit may be a regional difference. I've not been told it was incorrect, but it's not all that big a deal.

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    Default Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting

    Quote Originally Posted by lordhenry4000 View Post
    This was a lot of fun to read. Glad to see your party is consistent in its treatment of NPCs (I hope Miyuka doesn't get her clan involved in her retribution though; that can only end in tears).
    She never encountered them again. Shortly after they finished ToH, they went to Tovag Baragu for the exciting conclusion to the campaign ala Die Vecna Die!

    Also, I understand the reason for it ooc, but man would I be terrified of going anywhere in the ToH alone, even if I was flying and only going exactly where I'd gone before.
    Even if you're a 12th level druid?

    Speaking of Tovag Baragu, this incident is largely my fault. I forgot I was recycling an NPC from a very short-lived campaign before this one.

    Do We Know Him or Not?
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    "Okay, so we've been portal hopping for ages, and all we've found are Red Hand agents and Vecna cultists. We're completely lost," Herodrith grumbled.

    "We're not lost," Niani said. "We just don't know where we are, where we're going, or how to get back."

    "Stupid ..." Tom muttered.

    "We know where we're going," Herodrith sighed. "We just don't know how to get there."

    While the adventurers had been talking among themselves, they were unaware that they were being watched ... until now. With a maniacal laugh, a small figure sprang from the shadows. The purple-clad kenku swept his wide-brimmed hat from his head and gave the adventurers a mocking bow.

    "Well hello boys and girls," the kenku cackled. "What can I do to make you laugh?"

    "Who are you?" Tom asked, puzzled.

    "Oh god, not him!" Herodrith wailed.

    "We need to run!" Niani shrieked.

    "What, is it my breath?" the kenku asked.

    "Am I missing something?" Tom questioned, still confused. "Why are you so afraid of him, and why does he sound like Mark Hamill?"

    "This guy 3v1'd us at level 4," Herodrith said. "Killed us all."

    "Well before you completely break the fourth wall," the kenku sighed, "I believe you are referring to another group of adventurers. They looked so happy and comfy in their coffins!"

    "What exactly is going on?" Tom grumbled.

    "Oh forgive my manners, the name is Shambus," the kenku replied. "As for what happened, I just kept those other adventurers entertained long enough for their battle spells to wear off. All those spells the Big Bad Wizard cast before coming into the room ... turns out the Big Bads aren't so bad without their tricks."

    "I hate bards," Herodrith growled.

    "So what are you doing here?" Niani asked timidly.

    "Little ol' me? Why, I'm flattered you'd ask! I'm a follower of Vecna," Shambus cackled.

    "Guys, we can't let him keep talking," Herodrith said.

    "How do we know we can trust you?" Tom asked, ignoring Herodrith.

    "Obviously, you can't," Shambus laughed. "But I'm the only one around here that can give you a push in the right direction, so you really don't have an option."

    "You know the way?" Niani asked, hopeful.

    "I do indeed, my diminutive debutante. In fact, I'll even clue you in on something you might not have figured out. If nothing else, it'll be news to the stiffs," Shambus said, pointing at Tom and Herodrith.

    "Seriously, someone shut him up," Herodrith said worriedly.

    "What do you have to say?" Niani asked.

    "All these portals you've been gallantly hopping through don't take you to new parts of Tovag Baragu," Shambus explained as he perched atop a stone archway. "They take you to new planes. Yes, that's right, you've been plane-hopping from one Tovag Baragu to another!"

    "Guys, we can't let him keep talking!" Herodrith said angrily.

    "What is the issue," Tom grumbled, annoyed.

    "He has Perform (Oratory) as his maxed skill! He can talk and fascinate at the same time!"

    "Well since the meta-game has been let out of the bag," Shambus sighed, "you might as well know that I have the Subsonics feat, so I've been using my fascination this whole time."

    "Wait, what?"

    "So, how 'bout them Will Saves?"

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    Default Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting

    Quote Originally Posted by lordhenry4000 View Post
    It's much clearer now. Actually, the first time you mention his caste mark now feels a little too expositional to me.

    I think it's the "and so" that does it.
    Actually, I think you're right. Made the changes.
    He understands - more than the others do, at any rate. We don't talk much, and the silence speaks
    volumes. (Thanks to Gnomish Wanderer for the Nosferatu avatar! )

    Wanna see what all this Exalted stuff is about? Here's a primer!

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    Long time lurker, first time poster! This storys setting takes place in a campaign I'm currentlly in, but it takes place before the campaign starts.

    A quiet day in hell

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    Falthor woke up in the growing twilight. The clouds that constantly covered the Lower Planes thinned, allowing the light of Hellfire to light his room. He opened his eyes quickly and immediatelly scanned the room. Most of the room was lit well enough to see, but in the reccesses of it shadows his darkvision cut in. Satisfied that the room was unoccupied except for him he got out of bed. Looking out the window he stared at the little village he was in. It was a hovel to be sure, but it was where his work had taken him. He had taken a job guarding the city from demons, but it was a slow job. Still it wasn't one to put off. He got out of bed and pulled on his mythril shirt. He pulled the chain of his pendant out from beneath it. The Shadows Knight wasn't something to keep hidden, even if he didn't want to accept the burden that came with it. He drew his bow as he stepped out of his room in preperation for the day. It was a good thing he did, for there was a devil camped behind his door. It attacked him with a jagged blade as long as his arm. He dove back and narrowlly missed the tip of the sword. It buried itself in the frame of the door, stuck. Without wasting a second he drew his bow and jumped back 5 feet, loosing an arrow as he did so. The arrow tore through the monsters throat spraying acidic blood across the hall. Shaking his head, he took a few steps forward. Looking down at the now pitiful beast he said, "you've been getting sloppy." He chuckels to himself as he steps into the dark corridor and dissapeared into the shadows.
    Amazing Jack avatar by Tiffanie Lirle

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    Nice start, Vixsor. Sounds like there's some history to that character.

    Moral tests

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    We have destroyed the first obelisk. There were no proper traps within-we were tested in several ways, with greed being first.

    There was a huge door, flanked by two normal doors. On the left, a room with a huge amount of treasure. I don't think all the dragons in Faerun have so much. And somehow, I think the protections would have been similar. We left it alone. In the room on the right, simply a small bowl and a sign that read 'tithe'.

    "So...is this a tithe of our treasure, or that huge pile?"

    "Good question. We would be here for months if it's the pile. Let's start with ours."

    That was right. The huge pile vanished. A good thing we didn't mess with it.

    There were several such tests. We were sent many places, and tested many times. Most notable were when we saved an old man from bandits...at the cost of letting them keep the wagon he and his daughter were on. Irthos gave them a gem he had found earlier. He confided later that he had planned on saving it for a ritual that would give him the power to use magic.

    A ritual that consumes a gemstone to imbue him with magic. Kobolds are more dangerous than I thought.

    Also of note was when we were sent to an old woman's cottage. We helped prepare her home for an important guest...I tried to help her cook. I'm good with magic, cooking can't be that hard...But, well, the disciplines aren't related. I tried to make a pie and got a tiny golem.

    I really didn't think that was possible. Particularly as an accident.

    But, we did bring down the tower. The blade hidden in the tower was the sort most humans could only use with both hands.

    I don't know why Irthos took it. It looked ridiculous.

    On the other hand, I have an apple pie golem watching me write this.

    We made a deal with the guardian beast. He wanted to leave the isle, so he gave us a lost tooth kept in a pouch around his neck as proof that we had defeated him. We were given use of the ship, and are now on our way to the mainland, with the guardian on board.

    One major occurrence while we sailed. We saw the shadow of a huge beast deep in the water. It was larger than the monk's isle...and the guardian said that beasts like this will flood into our world until the obelisks controlled by the devils are dealt with.

    A chilling thought. Particularly if a leviathan such as that were loosed on the land.

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    Quote Originally Posted by mebecronck View Post
    Can you imagine how uncomfortable it was traveling on a small boat with a large predator for days on end. Who knows what it would have done if it found your snoring annoying.
    You did say it was CR 28. We wouldn't have known the difference until the celestial paperwork got sorted.

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    Default Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting

    Quote Originally Posted by SleepyShadow View Post
    Even if you're a 12th level druid?
    That would take the edge off a little, I admit.

    Quote Originally Posted by Winds View Post
    The 'for myself' grammar bit may be a regional difference. I've not been told it was incorrect, but it's not all that big a deal.
    The trouble with language is that not everyone speaks the same one, even when they supposedly do speaks exactly like I do.

    @SleepyShadow
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    I've been generally enjoying these ooc/4th-wall incidents, but this one bothered me a little; I'm not too sure why. I guess it just seemed a little less tongue-in-cheek than the others have been. I'm glad the players seem to have failed their OOC will saves, though (or at least Tom's and Niani's players). That's always entertaining as the DM.

    Shambus, by the way, is great. He's a perfectly characterized kenku.


    @Vixsor Lumin
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    Nice first snippet! I like Falthor's attitude; I'm interested to see where this goes (and why a tiny little village like this even exists on the Lower Planes somewhere, evidently in close enough proximity to badness that it needs to hire a full-time Demon Guard. How can they afford to pay him?). Also for some reason I really like the phrase "growing twilight." Keep it up!

    Nitpick: a hovel is basically a shack, and it sounds like you're using the word to describe the village Falthor is in. If you're referring to the building Falthor is sleeping in, I'd just try to make that a little clearer.

    Otherwise, a couple of formatting-related things--if you broke this snippet up into a few paragraphs, it would be a bit easier to read. Also, any time saying a number takes only one word, by convention you should write the word out rather than use the numeral (so "five" instead of "5", or "thirteen" rather than "13"). In this case, though, I'd honestly remove the number altogether. It feels unnecessarily mechanical to me, whereas something like "...drew his bow and jumped back, loosing an arrow as he did so" communicates the action just as well, without reminding me explicitly that this happened in a game in which the smallest unit of movement is the five-foot-step.


    @Winds
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    But, well, the disciplines aren't related. I tried to make a pie and got a tiny golem.
    Stop making me laugh; I'm at work.

    On the other hand, I have an apple pie golem watching me write this.
    What did I just say? (Please make more apple pie golems. Use them for everything. Oh man.)

    The only thing I found a little off-putting in this snippet was the ship transition. So far, these entries have all been quite short, not encompassing very much time, but suddenly this one covers a whole slew of trials (which makes sense; Kalach probably didn't have time to make entries while dealing with the Obelisk), and then goes on to include "while we sailed." That makes me feel like there have been a few days of sailing past already, which was a bit of a jolt. I don't think it would have been a stretch to put the leviathan sighting in its own journal entry.


    I can't believe how long it's taking me to write this thing. It's really just an introduction to the rest of the story, which is part of the problem I'm having--not a whole lot actually happens. Bluh. Hopefully I'll lose patience with trying to get it perfect and put it up later today.
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    Quote Originally Posted by lordhenry4000 View Post
    I guess it just seemed a little less tongue-in-cheek than the others have been.
    That's because it wasn't tongue-in-cheek, sadly. While the others have more or less just been ooc slips, Herodrith's player was intentionally metagaming that time. It annoyed me.

    Shambus, by the way, is great. He's a perfectly characterized kenku.
    Thanks

    This next one is more or less a collection of mini-snippets about the reactions my players had to some of the more memorable Red Hand agents along the road of the campaign.

    The Red Hand Has Unusual Henchmen
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    Vronti Spathi
    The captain had been looking forward to the arrival of the interlopers for some time now. He had made sure that the defenses posted near the entrance to the newly captured temple of Vecna were light. He wanted those adventurers to make it to the bridge. The blue half-dragon checked his armor straps one last time, his long tail twitching back and forth with anticipation. He glanced over his shoulder at his two companions: hobgoblin blackguards, members of the elite of the Red Hand of Doom. Just outside the door he could hear the death cries of the guards he had posted. Amateurs made a wonderful mess of things, forcing those adventurers to spend precious spells and other resources.

    Vronti picked up his sword and shield, giving a nod to his companions. The door on the other side of the bridge opened, and Vronti Spathi was pleased to see Tom, Niani, and Herodrith enter.

    "This is where we hold them!" Vronti bellowed, inspiring the hobgoblins to greatness. "This is where we fight! This is where they die!"

    "And this is why I told you not to use your high-level spells on the mooks we've been fighting along the way," Tom said reproachfully.

    "What?" Herodrith replied with a shrug. "I didn't know there would be a boss fight already."


    Those Damned Ninjas

    "Look, I'm sorry about your wolf," Herodrith sighed. "I didn't know there was a Sphere of Annihilation under the bridge."

    "I'm not mad about that," Niani replied. "I just wish you'd memorize something other than combat spells."

    "That's your job."

    "Yeah, but druid's can't magically conjure up the answer to a riddle," Tom stated.

    "Riddles are stupid," Herodrith grumbled. "I didn't think it would take us half an hour to figure out that the answer was 'teeth'."

    "At least now we have the Hand of Vecna," Niani said cheerfully.

    Herodrith started to say something, but was cut off when a figure lunged from the shadows and drove his shoulder into Herodrith's chest. The necropolitan's ribs broke with a sickening crunch. The attacker backed momentarily.

    "Hey look, Shen came back!" Niani giggled.

    "Oh right, they did get away," Herodrith said thoughtfully, ignoring his broken ribs. "I forgot what those ninjas' real names were."

    "I thought as much," Shen grumbled.

    "We whooped you guys last time," Tom chuckled. "We're going to do it again."

    "Not this time," the ninja replied as he folded his arms over his chest defiantly. "We have become more powerful than you could hope to defeat."

    "We got a serious rematch going on here," said a much smaller figure as it emerged from the shadows.

    "Aww, Kennen is so cute," Niani cooed delightedly. "Him's a wittle ninja."

    "Look, my name is not ... okay, fine, whatever, you guys win the name argument," Kennen groused.

    "Hey look, I beat the ninjas in initiative," Tom laughed.

    He stepped forward and swung his blade at Shen.

    "Steely Resolve!" the ninja shouted just as Tom struck, and the blade rebounded harmlessly off his shoulder.

    "Wait, time out," Herodrith said quickly. "What the hell was that?"

    "Most of my levels are Crusader," Shen answered with a low chuckle. "Now if you'll excuse me, I believe I have another attack to ignore."

    "What about the midget?" Tom asked as Shen dodged his second swing.

    "I'm a Jade Phoenix Mage who likes electricity spells," Kennen replied as he cast Lightning Bolt.

    "Tome of Battle is so OP," Tom whined.

    "It's been allowed since the beginning," Niani reminded him as she cast Resist Energy. "You could have used it, too."

    "Don't worry," Herodrith said calmly before casting Divine Power. "It's two against three. We've got this."

    "I thought all three of them got away," Niani said, puzzled.

    "Yeah, where's Akali?" Tom asked.

    It was then that a third figure sprang from the shadows, landing a kick to the back of Tom's head and striking him twice with both of her kamas. The rogue collapsed to the ground, unconscious and bleeding.

    "Telflammar Shadow Lord ..." Herodrith sighed. "Should have guessed."

    "You've been waiting to do that this whole time, haven't you?" Niani giggled.

    "Pretty much," Akali replied with a nod.

    "I *had* to ask," Tom grumbled.

    "Hush, you're unconscious," Akali reminded him.


    White Crow Returns


    "Red Hand hobgoblins, zombies, hobgoblin zombies, a giant flesh golem made out of hands, and a creepy dancing witch," Tom listed off the things they had killed as they trudged through Vecna's palace. "Did I miss anything?"

    "Nope, I think that's it," Niani replied.

    "Can we rest yet?" Herodrith asked for the umpteenth time.

    "We are on a time limit," Niani reminded him. "We don't have time to rest. Just be conservative with your spells."

    "He's really bad at that," Tom said. "That's why we lost the battle of Brindol."

    "How was I supposed to know there was going to be more than three fights?" Herodrith groaned exasperatedly.

    "I warned you at the start of the battle, but you never did listen to me, did you?" answered a woman's voice from down the hall.

    Although her clothes were different and she no longer was adorned with her customary beads and feathers, the raven-haired beauty striding toward them was unmistakable.

    "White Crow!" Niani cried delightedly as she rushed forward. "You're alive!"

    White Crow knelt down to reciprocate the halfling's embrace, wrapping her arms around the tiny druid in a tight hug.

    "Okay, what's going on here?" Herodrith asked suspiciously. "You died. I was there, we all were, and I know for a fact that I didn't pay to have you resurrected."

    "I don't understand why you didn't," White Crow said. "I had been a loyal companion to you all, and I know you had the money for it."

    "You guys told me we were too broke to resurrect her," Niani said.

    "Well I guess we could have, but it was cheaper just to hire a new henchman than to bring her back," Herodrith replied with a shrug.

    "I see how little worth I held to you, even back then," White Crow said bitterly.

    "Saying that to her face is pretty cold," Tom grumbled.

    "What happened to you, White Crow?" Niani asked.

    "After Brindol fell, I was resurrected, but not by any of you," White Crow answered coldly. "The Red Hand recognized me as one of the adventurers attempting to put a stop to them, so the brought me back in hopes of learning more about the three of you. Though they tortured me, I told them nothing at first, hoping in vain that you three would come rescue me. No amount of physical or magical pain wrought upon me could wrest the knowledge from my lips. But you never came. So many days passed that I lost track, and lost hope of being rescued. Eventually I told them everything I knew about you three."

    "Traitor," Herodrith hissed.

    "You dare have the gall to call me a traitor after you abandoned me and left me at the mercy of those filthy hobgoblins?" White Crow snapped angrily. "Once they had pried every last secret from me, they left me as a plaything for the second-in-command."

    "I'm so sorry, White Crow," Niani said sadly. "What did he do to you?"

    "What any vampire lord would have done," White Crow replied with a wicked grin before sinking her fangs into the halfling's neck.

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    Welcome to Joseph's Gap
    or: Worse than City Guards
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    The midmorning sun glares at us from over the mountains. I glare back, blinking tiredness from my eyes and considering, not for the first time, that almost any other means of travel would be preferable to riding giant owls all through the night. Only Namia seems able to sleep without fear of falling. With any luck, we'll get some real rest tonight, and in actual beds!

    There's no gate or wall along the western side of Joseph's Gap, just the huge, ornate bridge spanning the river. The bridge is supposedly made of real wrought-iron, fired and worked without any magical aid. That's not why anyone cares about it, though, just the sort of thing I end up knowing, being around Nim so long. I don't know where he hears this stuff. It's not like we sit around taverns all night picking up gossip.

    We step onto the bridge behind a pair of haggard-looking peasants, maneuvering around them as they stop to throw a half-laden coinpurse into the water below, touch their hearts, and continue into the city. I feel myself frown slightly. It turns into a full-on grimace when I see a pair of priests, dressed in spotless white robes, catch sight of us. I realize I've left my pilgrim's cloak open to the day's warmth, and Saving Grace's flawless mithral surface must be dazzling in the sun. My left hand instinctively drifts to my hip, ensuring Honor Bound stays out of sight. A mithral breastplate is only a sign of rank, as long as no one looks too closely. An elaborately-decorated adamantine longsword in a glassteel sheath, however, could lead to questions.

    The priests arrive, actually a monk and a cleric, by the way one takes a position just behind the other. We come to a stop as they do and the monk gives a slow nod to Filbert, who has his blindfold on being stoic behind me. The cleric clears his throat and addresses me, shifting slightly to get the glare out of his eyes. I can practically feel Charlize behind me fighting the urge to intervene. I'm the only one looking respectable at the moment and we don’t want to give any reason to remember us.

    "Very fine morning t'you, m'Lord! Have you come t'Joseph's Gap on pilgrimage, then?" He speaks with a high, nasal tone, and bobs his head around like an owl, trying to find refuge from the sun's glittering reflection. I keep my body moving, just enough to cause him grief. I hear Nim cough back a snicker behind me.

    "Yes, yes," I answer, trying to sound bored and imperious. "It seems that exceptionally many others have had the same idea, not that I blame them, after what happened in Renaldwatch. Still, all the peasantry on the road makes for a far less relaxing journey than I usually prefer. I'll be glad to find an inn they can't afford to stay at!" I laugh; it feels forced, but the cleric and monk chuckle along, so they either didn't notice or don't care. "Now if you will excuse me."

    I take half a step forward before I'm interrupted. "These your servants, then, m'Lord?" he asks, looking behind me. "Might I 'ave your family name, for the registry?" The monk produces a parchment scroll and a pen, which he dips into a long, thin inkwell at his belt. "And 'ave you decided on a Sacrifice, m'Lord? Or d'you prefer t'make a donation t'the Church, and we make a Sacrifice in your name?"

    "I will make my own Sacrifice, thank you very much, but not until I've gotten cleaned up and had some decent food." I step forward again, brushing the cleric lightly but firmly aside as he tries block my path again. "I am certain that you will still be here when we return. Good day." The others take the cue and follow close behind as I step off the bridge and into Joseph's Gap.

    When the crowd has thinned around us, Charlize mutters so only we can hear, "I believe Claaus just handled a social situation, on his own, without resorting to violence or getting us run out of town. Truly, this is the City of Miracles."


    Blarghghwrdlhgwrdwldgrwrhldwr. Please please tell me how this comes across. I'm trying to work on Claaus' voice, so naturally I started with a scene where his only speech is in his trying-to-talk-like-a-noble voice. At least this one's out of the way and we can move on to chapters where things might actually happen! It's looking like the final thing will be 15-16 chapters altogether. We'll see.

    @SleepyShadow
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    Vronti Spathi
    I feel like it's inappropriate to have a half-dragon quoting 300, somehow.

    Those Damned Ninjas
    I LOLed pretty hard seeing these guys come back. And by LOLed, I mean "huehuehuehue morde es #1"

    God damnit I didn't even mean to make the LOL pun.

    White Crow Returns
    More vengeance! Really well-executed (in-game and in-snippet)!

    Can I just say that I love Herodrith? I'd probably be more annoyed by him at the table, but you write him well enough that he's lovably hatable instead of just the regular type.

    Conclusion: these were all fantastic; make more now.
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    Default Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting

    It's written well. Though, if his pals were that worried, why didn't they speak up? Still, his 'noble voice' sounds pretty natural.

    As for the pie golem, it couldn't speak, it's attacks did zero damage, and it rotted away in three days. Also, Kalach doesn't have access to an oven. But it would be fun, in a different kind of game.

    Planar Travel: Love it, you're leaving it

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    So..tired...It's just not fair to go from those long days on the ship to something like this...

    The guardian parted ways with us when we made shore. We barely noticed, as we were too absorbed by our surroundings. We are not in Faerun anymore.

    The buildings are gigantic. Taller even than the obelisks, even. Made of impossibly pure steel and glass. And there are dozens, maybe hundreds of them.

    The most confusing thing was a set of letters etched into the hills beyond the buildings. It didn't seem to spell anything, and I can't imagine what they were for...

    After gawking for a time, someone checked the pouch the beasts' fang had been in. There was a compass within.

    "Is this pointing north?"

    "Who knows? Either way, do you have a better idea?"

    "No."

    So we walked along the path it pointed for us. Soon enough, we came to a barricade, and were stopped by its guards. All doubt that we had left Faerun left when they introduced themselves. The HPD? What kind of name is that?

    I think that they are similar to paladins. Their first thought was whether we were a threat, then whether we needed help. They wouldn't let us past before the next day, however, and we were to help with the defence of the barricade.

    Every night, a horde of zombies attacked. There were powerful demons, as well, but they were content to watch. I am not surprised. From what I gather, the only magic in this realm is the noisy wands they use. They are near to panicking.

    It's been a long night. I'm just tired, but the others have exausted their supplies of ranged weapons. Irthos is out of arrows, which leaves him all but helpless in combat. They gave him a noise-wand, but he can barely work it.

    Of greater concern is that we very obviously don't fit. This place must have been an enormous trading hub, because everything they have is high-quality. We, however, have poorly-mantained and relatively low-quality armor. There's also the fact that none of them have heard of nonhumans. The favored soul is human, so he got off easy. Logrim they seemed okay with. Irthos, though...he's used to people not knowing what a dragonwrought is, but the fact that no one knows what a kobold is is confusing to him. The fact that he's decended from a fand dragon and is covered in spikes doesn't help. They think he's a demon, and only take him on sufferance. They aren't familiar with warlocks, thankfully. Since all I did was smite the zombies with my power, they let it pass. I shudder to think what they would have done had they known how similar my power is to the one that raised them to begin with...

    Tomorrow, we will help them gather supplies, with the help of a former prisoner. Except for Irthos, who they don't want to have out of their sight. I feel for him.

    Maybe the leviathan isn't the only threat. It's going to be a long day tomorrow.


    Surprised? So were we!

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    Default Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting

    That's a good point; it's obvious in my brain but I don't know why I'd expect anyone else to know it. There are a couple reasons why they (Charlize in particular) didn't speak up, but the most prominent is that we're fugitives and dressed as pilgrims, Claaus' failure to remain in disguise notwithstanding. The society is a mageocracy with a very rigid caste system, so there was no way Charlize could have intervened without giving a name, which we can't afford to have checked (everything gets checked with this DM. Every bureaucracy in the world finishes all their paperwork every day, with time and motivation to spare to investigate anything and everything). There are some other reasons but I'll be trying to work them into the story as I go. Anyway, I edited in a bit about that; hopefully it's a clearer now.

    @Planar Travel
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    Oh... Oh my... I do LOVE that you aren't just thrown into the real world, but specifically into a real-world zombie-apocalypse. Good stuff! Also,
    I think that they are similar to paladins.
    Awesome.
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    Default Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting

    @lordhenry: I thought it was quite well written, though I have to say that a bit of back story on the city would have been nice. I'm not sure if it was intentional, but I loved the Irish accent that the priest had.

    Also, glad you like Herodrith. He's a good player, but he can be a pain in the neck sometimes.

    Conclusion: these were all fantastic; make more now.
    You got it!

    You Know It's The End of the Campaign When ...
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    "Why are we in Sigil?" Herodrith sighed.

    "To stop Vecna from eradicating the multiverse," Niani replied.

    "To get my revenge!" Tamashi growled. "No one steals my divinity and gets away with it!"

    "Because this is our third attempt at world saving and it looks bad if we screw up again?" Tom said with a shrug.

    "I know .... but why Sigil?" Herodrith grumbled. "I hate Sigil."

    "You've never even been to Sigil," Niani reminded him.

    "But we met someone from Sigil, and she talked funny."

    "I liked Kuri. She was fun."

    "I liked her too," Tom said with a wry grin.

    "We all know why you liked her," Niani said flatly.

    Tamashi sneered irritably at the three adventurers. She hated that she had been forced to work with the mongrels that had been hounding her every step as she guided the Red Hand to greatness. Though she was an elf woman, Tamashi wielded the respect and fear of the hobgoblins, the giants, the kuo-toa, and even the drow elves. Then again, fear and respect were easy to come by when one has been blessed by three deities: Tiamat, Hextor, and Lolth.

    Then Vecna had to steal away her divine power to bootstrap himself to full godhood, and now he threatened to ruin everything Tamashi had worked so hard to achieve. The multiverse was hers to unite and command, not his to destroy!

    As the four of them walked through the crowded streets of Sigil, a sudden cry of delight caught their attention as a pink-haired tiefling girl came bounding over to them. Niani squeeled with delight and hugged the tiefling's knees.

    "Well I'll be a sodding coney-catcher's daughter!" the tiefling said excitedly. "I never did reckon I'd eyeball you canny bloods banging around the Cage! Are you planewalking spivs here to deal with the power that went and slipped through The Lady's net?"

    "It's good to see you again, Kuri," Niani said happily.

    "I hate Sigil slang ..." Herodrith sighed.

    "I agree," Tamashi said in a low voice, wondering if she could kill the tiefling before the adventurers could stop her.

    "So where is this, uh, power at?" Tom asked.

    "I'll show ya," Kuri offered. "Vecna went and hidey-holed in the Doomguard's armory. There's a lot of graybeards and berks who think they can get inside, but all the ones that do more than rattle their bone-boxes end up in the dead book faster than a wink."

    She led them to the armory where a massive crowd had gathered around a large and imposing building. However, they all kept a safe distance away, and there was also a small perimeter of empty space around The Lady of Pain, who graced the area with her presence.

    "We got here just in time," Kuri said mischievously. "Another couple of addle-coves gonna try the barrier!"

    Elminster and Drzzt, two people known across the multiverse, strode confidently toward the building. Elminster cast every protective spell in his impressive arsenal, and thus warded the two of them strode confidently toward the armory. They made it up to the front doors before the two of them were instantly torn asunder by Vecna's divine will.

    Tom collapsed to the floor in a fit of laughter.

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    Default Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting

    Yeah; it's been a struggle trying to decide how and when to give setting exposition. The trouble is, by this point in the campaign the party is around level 15-16 (started at level 1), and the campaign has been going for about 6 years of in-game time, so there's no need for the characters to be talking about that kind of stuff. Was there anything in particular that I didn't give you that you felt you needed to know about the setting for this snippet? Or was it a more general, wish-I-knew-more sort of feel? (If you haven't read the precursors to this story, they do give a bit more background, though admittedly not a whole lot). I'd very much like to know what sorts of things aren't clear while I'm revising the next couple snippets.

    And yes, that's what you get when I'm editing things over St. Patty's Day.

    @End of Campaign
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    WELP. TIME TO LEAVE. Although this party apparently all lived through the ToH, so maybe they have above-average-enough survivability to deal with it. I'm also curious how Tamashi ended up having to work with these guys. Good work as usual!


    Specific comments:
    First off, Herodrith's first line is priceless. Great way to kick this snippet off.

    She hated that she had been forced to work with...
    This feels a little awkward tense-wise, since she's presumably still being "forced" to work with the party. Nothing in my brain feels particularly smooth as a replacement, but something like "hated having to work with" or "hated that she was forced to work with" might be a little clearer.

    "I hate Sigil slang ..." Herodrith sighed.
    I love the Sigil slang.

    They made it up to the front doors before the two of them were instantly torn asunder by Vecna's divine will.
    This feels a little too casual to me, even though that's kind of the point. It's casual on Vecna's end, sure, but (correct me if I'm mistaken) the ease with which he dispatches these two is supposed to be a bit of a shock (to the reader), and that's not coming across here.
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    Default Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting

    Quote Originally Posted by lordhenry4000 View Post
    This feels a little too casual to me, even though that's kind of the point. It's casual on Vecna's end, sure, but (correct me if I'm mistaken) the ease with which he dispatches these two is supposed to be a bit of a shock (to the reader), and that's not coming across here.
    I was just presenting it more or less how it was presented in-game. A big reason for the laid-back killing of Drzzt and Elminster is because my players unanimously hate The Big Faerun Fellas. So I threw 'em a bone lol.

    Besides, Tom's player really did fall down laughing.

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    Default Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting

    Quote Originally Posted by SleepyShadow View Post
    Besides, Tom's player really did fall down laughing.
    Oh, I definitely caught that. And I figured that's what was going on as far as the style is concerned, but I think you could still get the casual feeling across without sacrificing the impact to the reader. To get the entertainment across I feel like you just need something to tie it off.

    Quote Originally Posted by mebecronck
    Devils. Not demons.
    To be honest, I'm actually kind of relieved to get this clarification. I was a little worried that your campaign had wandered into a mexican-american race war of some kind
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    Default Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting

    Hmp, details. We're dealing with both.

    Besides, it's not my fault I forgot which one balors are...


    Day on the town

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    It's hard to write like this. I hope I can actually read it later...

    We were sent as a foraging party today. Elle was sent along with us, in part to act as guide, and because we don't know anything about this metalwork they use in place of magic.

    She was apparently a thief of some kind-they released her because they needed all the help they could get to stay alive. She'll certainly help us...if nothing else, it's good to know what these people are talking about.

    Our foraging found us a working 'car' first...one of the sleek-looking ones. Elle said it was a mustang. It looks nothing like a horse, but I'll take her word for it. Thankfully, this is the sort of thing she usually steals.

    "Just a minute...

    ...

    Ugh. Forget the quiet way, then. Gimme that club for a sec..."

    I really hope she can do better than that next time.

    She drove it to a gas station. It was explained to me that the machines that ran the place were subservient to one that made power for them. As it was dark inside, it was my job to find it.

    I can't imagine how I survived without my darksight. Such a usful thing to have...

    When we found it, Elle repaired it...I think? I don't know if it was broken. Afterward, the place filled with light. We grabbed a lot of little metal containers that apparently had food in them. Only...we didn't have a car anymore. Someone had stolen it.

    But it left a trail of liquid, so we followed it.

    It was put in a building filled with people in black, red-spattered robes.

    "So...I think we should NOT get their attention if we can help it."

    "Agreed. Let's go for stealth."

    That was ruined pretty quick. The entrance we tried was filled with zombies.

    Now, it would have been ruined if we'd noticed they were inert. As it was, I think the sounds of gunfire, spellcraft and thwacking garnered attention. It turns out that the cult of Asmodeus likes madmen that can track what's happening on the other side of a door.

    These madmen weren't much challenge, however.

    So we recovered (and fixed) the mustang, and also found another car the size of a small building. So we took that back to the barricade, along with the food, and the liquid that makes cars go. We also brought back the sacrifice the cultists made. Given that supplies were short already, they may not thank us for bringing back someone who was set on fire, then healed. She isn't likely to be useful to them for a while.

    Irthos, however, will be. He chose to remain there, since he didn't feel he could contribute to our quest if he couldn't fight properly.

    I find myself hoping he returns to us, but it isn't likely.

    So now we are are in the car, with Elle driving in the direction the compass points us.

    I actually look forward to reaching the obelisk. They may be dangerous, but at least I know what's happening...

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    Default Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting

    But... Balors are demons...

    @Winds
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    Eheheheheh, is he writing this on a computer?

    I really like your descriptions of all the modern-day stuff, especially this line:

    It was explained to me that the machines that ran the place were subservient to one that made power for them.
    Though it was a little jarring to see 'gas station' just thrown around without the quotes you used on "'car'", since it's surely not a term he's familiar with.

    Did Irthos' player leave/swap Irthos out for Elle?
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    Default Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting

    It was a swap, yes. It's just that Irthos wasn't going to survive without refilling his quiver, which he couldn't do.

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    Default Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting

    Man, you guys write quality stuff a lot faster than I do

    Here's a random background I wrote up for a character I'm applying to a campaign over on MW, while I'm revising parts two and three of the Joseph's Gap story.

    Bedtime Story
    or: How to Make a Racist
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    “Ten generations ago, in eastern Kyuro, there was a thriving city-state. The people there called themselves the Gnomish Gnation, since they were all Gnomes! Gnomes of every shape and size; some like you and me; some bigger; some even smaller than you! They were very friendly, and everybody liked them. Men and Lizardfolk and Halflings came from far and wide to visit the Gnomish Gnation, to trade for their fine crafts and eat their delicious food.

    “Your father’s father’s father’s father’s father’s father’s father’s father’s father’s father--do you remember what his name was?--he was named Wink, and he lived in the Gnomish Gnation, all those years ago, with his wife Elpa. They were hunters just like us, and they were pretty famous for all the rare and tasty beasts and fish they caught, and visitors rarely left without making sure to eat at least one meal with them.

    “Then one day, Wink saw a lot of smoke, far in the distance when he was out hunting. He went to investigate it, and found a whole army of soot-covered Elves marching out of a burning Halfling village and headed for the Gnomish Gnation! Wink ran all the way home to tell everyone what he had seen, but many people refused to believe that the Elves would do such a terrible thing, no matter how Wink tried to persuade them.

    “Wink took Elpa (who was pregnant with your great-great-great-great-great-great-great-grandfather at the time), as well as a few other families, and went into hiding in a secret place they knew about at the edge of the forest close to the city. They watched as the Elves came to the town and a tiny little Forest Gnome named Glup went out to greet them and ask them about these awful rumors.

    “Well, Wink and Elpa couldn’t hear what the Elves said, but they saw the leader draw a long sword and cut Glup’s head right off! Then the Elves took their torches and started burning all the houses, one by one, and when they finally left, they took with them all the Gnomes they hadn’t killed, locked up in a big cage.

    “Wink and Elpa and the rest of the Gnomes came out of hiding and went to the city, and when they saw the devastation they cried for three days. Then they made up their minds to go rescue their friends from the evil Elves, and for the next ten years they lived in secret, running from place to place to avoid getting caught, looking for the others in the midst of a terrible war, and taking care of their new baby at the same time.”

    “Did they ever find their friends, mama?”

    “Yes, but when they finally did learn where they were and broke into the Elf fortress to rescue them, Wink and the other free Gnomes learned that many of the ones who had been taken had died in slavery, and the rest were so hungry and weak they could hardly walk. Only seven of them managed to escape with the other free Gnomes.

    “They spent the next year fleeing to the coast, nursing the former slaves back to health along the way. They were followed, of course; the Elves wanted to stamp them out more than ever. In fact, they started just destroying any village they thought Wink, Elba, and the rest could possibly be hiding in, so the Gnomes had to stop going to any towns or seeing any other people.

    “Eventually, they made it to the coast, and in the night they snuck onto a Halfling ship that was just leaving for Tressyl. The Halflings were mad at first when they found the stowed-away Gnomes, but Elpa told them all they had been through, and then they understood why they had to sneak on board. They had many great adventures on their journey across the sea--but that’s a story for another night.”

    *

    It’s been nearly two thousand years since my ancestors were driven from their homeland, fleeing with the rest of the innocent before a nation of soulless murderers. I find it amazing how little has changed. We like to consider ourselves civilized in this age, or at least I do.

    Everyone’s heard the rumors of whole towns being put to the torch recently for “rebel activity.” I’m certain that sheltering the rebels’ leader is offense enough to “justify” such an act. My essential belongings are already packed, my bow and grandfather’s armor by the door. I only wonder if the people of Kyrius will respond better than the citizens of the Gnome Gnation did, all those years ago. I know I will.
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    Default Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting

    Interesting...sounds like that family has quite the grudge to bear.

    As for the amount of work...I'm trying to become a novelist, so I can pass this off as training. Totally. Plus, I *have* to type fast. Even with two snippets now and skipping most of the fights, I'm running behind!

    Morons and Mine-shafts

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    So we finally reached the next destination.

    It takes a long time to get places, but cars are much better than walking. Not as good as teleporting, though. At least the trips are uneventful. That's lucky, because there are zombies almost everywhere.

    In any case, after several days traveling in the desert, we have reached another city.

    The obelisk here is not white as the others were, but a marbled black-red. A...wonderful thing to see.

    Elle found where the cars are stored. Since our horse will show signs of use (and can but used by anyone, thanks to her breaking it open), we moved our suppliers to a large, square one. Elle unlocked properly this time, so it should escape notice.

    We then went in search of this tower's guardian. Thankfully, it was a simple task. It's a dwarf, which I'm sure Logrim is glad to see. Or was. He was wearing heavy armor and carried a large warhammer.

    Unfortunately, he was very drunk. Nothing he said made any sense, and he didn't seem to know where he was. This didn't stop him from making trouble for us.

    When we tried to get him to make sense, he made reference to someone that 'should have stayed in their hole'. He kept going...until finally seeming to address Logrim.

    “You need to STAY in your HOLE!”

    With that, he smashed the floor with the hammer, making a deep hole in the ground, which he told Logrim to stay in.

    A hole so deep we couldn't see the bottom, and the idiot jumped into on orders of a drunk who didn't know who he was. I just...I can't believe this. On top of everything else, this just...

    Oh, good. And now it's raining.





    Logrim had to shed his armor so he would float. There isn't anything we can do for him, so we're setting up to rest.


    Several in-character days later...


    Into hell itself! This cannot fail.

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    Well, the drunk guardian got sober. And Logrim managed to stay afloat until morning.

    The guardian is called Dakmar. He failed to keep the devils from taking the obelisk, and has been drunk ever since. He says the inside will have become an offshoot of the Nine Hells.

    I knew that I would go there...the terms of the pact say that

    Dakmar agreed to open the door for us, if we drank his...concoction...

    We have been insensibly drunk since. That was nearly a week ago. Incidentally, the...substance...also serves as fuel. I woke up wearing some of Elle's clothes. I do NOT want to know. Nor does she.

    Both a horrific hangover and smacked across the face until her hand hurt. For something I'm pretty sure I didn't do.

    This just...I just...ugh.

    In any case, we found some more clothing for Elle.


    The obelisk had, in place of the usual moral tests, an opening into one of the Nine Hells. It was burning hot within, at first. Cold, later.

    The only thing of particular note was that we encountered two teiflings chained to a wall. One was dead...the one barely living. Kaldrig says his power told him she wasn't evil.

    She came to well after we got clear of the obelisk. Her name is Neeshka, and she will travel with us for the time being.

    She can perceive the touch of other planes, due to her heritage. She knew Kaldrig was blessed, and that I am cursed.

    I am glad we're done with the Hells for now. We'll be back...

    We now are heading somewhere new. Because of Neeshka joining us, we took the larger vehicle. Elle is not pleased. She liked that mustang.

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    The Arczeckhi Barbarians
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    Shen and Tiger Palm approached Nechara, an ominous feeling hanging over their heads. It was strange that the pair had seen no travelers on the road to Nechara; as the cart trundled forward, Shen grimly observed that he couldn't even hear the sounds of any local wildlife.

    Shen's journey with the old merchant had begun over a month ago. He had heard tell of a Fair Folk noble who wished to negotiate trade; while Shen had never personally dealt with the chaotic outsiders, he was willing to give this one the benefit of the doubt. Tiger Palm, a grizzled Guild merchant, was willing to go along with Shen, and so far, their trip had been uneventful.

    Now, however, both travelers were quite uneasy, and the dread hammered its way home when the trade hub was finally within sight. Nechara was in ruins, not a single person to be seen. Shen looked to Tiger Palm, shocked, and then slipped quietly off the cart, one hand at his belt, ready to seize a throwing knife at a moment's notice. His companion followed suit, drawing a short sword.

    The town was empty, and as the two explored, they caught sight of the river at the edge of Nechara. The river had been made into a hazard; any ship that tried to go downstream would be rendered a wreck by the rugged rocks that now filled its bed. Suddenly hearing movement, Shen gestured to Tiger Palm just in time; the two looked to the rooftops to see ten beings gathered there.

    Coarse red fur covered their bodies, and tipped their long, pointed ears. The barbarians looked down at them with red eyes, their fanged mouths twisted into hostile sneers, gesturing violently with their spears. Tiger Palm's response was a single word, his face blanched with fear.

    "Arczeckhi!"

    Shen knew a little of the Arczeckhi - these Wyld barbarians had attacked numerous settlements in the past, but their numbers had been reduced to insignificance hundreds of years ago! What he knew of them, though, was not reassuring; the Arczeckhi only deemed one a person if he could kill one of their number (even their own children were not spared in this regard).

    As the largest of their number stepped forward, Shen drew his knife and asked, "Where are the villagers?"

    The leader chuckled and rumbled, "They have become food for the Dragon... as will you!"

    He gestured for three of his minions to attack, but the prince reacted first; as they dove down to attack, Shen jumped up, nimbly weaving past their spears to deliver a full-bodied kick to the throat of one barbarian. Tiger Palm moved to engage one as Shen handled the others, moving in close to negate the reach of their spears. Pouring Essence into his graceful evasion, Shen's caste mark began to gently shine.

    As they fought, the leader gestured to the other barbarians, who drew their bows. Shen continued to nimbly dodge the attacks of his opponents, delivering quick jabs to stun them, and shouted up to the leader, "Call off your attack!"

    The Arczeckhi leader laughed. "How can I take you seriously when you won't even kill your enemies?" One of the barbarians' spears suddenly scored a blow against Shen, leaving him bleeding; the wound was not deep, due to the enchanted silk Shen wore.

    The prince angrily cried out, "You want death, barbarian? I shall give it to you!" He hurled his throwing knife, and it buried itself to the hilt in the chief's eye socket. Before Shen could say another word, though, the Arczeckhi reacted, springing upon their fallen comrade and tearing at his flesh with their teeth; even the ones on the ground had suddenly turned feral, leaping at the unconcious barbarian at Shen's feet. Shen looked to Tiger Palm, confused, and together, the two ran.
    Last edited by TheCountAlucard; 2012-04-10 at 11:52 AM.
    He understands - more than the others do, at any rate. We don't talk much, and the silence speaks
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    Default Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting

    First: comments! Because you jerks are all writing awesome stuff while I struggle and fail to get my own character's voice right.

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    @Winds
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    Good goal! Plus, now that I know that, I get to be extra nitpicky about critiquing your stuff, because now I'm "helping"!

    M&M
    A...wonderful thing to see.
    I'm not sure what you're doing here. Is this sarcastic or genuine? (I suspect the former, but it's not very clear)

    Since our horse will show signs of use (and can but used by anyone
    Just a couple typos in here (I'm assuming "house", since breaking open a horse sounds... messy).

    Oh, Dwarves. The end of this made me Though, it kind of comes off like the party's abandoning Logrim, with the whole "well, we can't help him so I guess it's bedtime" thing. Something to clarify that they're presumably keeping watch over his hole and floating status would make this a bit clearer.

    Into Hell Itself
    I knew that I would go there...the terms of the pact say that
    Is there supposed to be more to this paragraph?

    In any case, we found some more clothing for Elle.
    ... This suggests to me that Kalach is continuing to wear Elle's clothes, and I cannot stop laughing. Also, damn that's some good beer. (though this line: "the...substance...also serves as fuel." confused me--do you mean literally fuel, like for cars, or just that it burns well, or that it also provides sustainance?)

    We now are heading somewhere new.
    This seems a little unneeded. It feels assumed that you're keeping on the move, so unless you give more detail about where you're going next, this line doesn't give the reader anything new to work with.

    I like the teasers in this chapter (Kaldrig's blessedness, Kalach's cursedness (though I think that's been mentioned before, it's nice to have these reminders that there's something going on there), Kalach's certainty that they'll be going back to Hell at some point... very nice.

    Overall I enjoyed these chapters; only a couple typos/clarifications that were a little jarring. Otherwise, great work as usual!


    @TCA
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    he was willing to give this one the benefit of the doubt.
    Why? Is there something special about this one, or is he just generally willing to give people a chance?

    the Arczeckhi only treated deemed one a person
    I'm assuming "treated" is an extra word here.

    even their own children were not spared in this regard
    I can see how their numbers would have been drastically reduced! How are there any left at all?!

    his silk garment was enchanted to turn away blows like steel armor
    A couple things about this. First, this sentence doesn't really flow with the rest of the fight; I think it could be reworked to mesh better or even taken out entirely. Also a nitpick: the part I quoted above is a garden-path sentence. It sounds as though "steel armor" is supposed to be an example of the kinds of blows it's enchanted to turn away, until you get to the end and realize that interpretation doesn't make sense.

    the Arczeckhi reacted, springing upon their fallen comrade and tearing at his flesh with their teeth
    Uh... oh my. I wasn't expecting that. Again I have to ask, how does this culture still exist???

    This was a fun read; you do a very good job setting the scene and the fight is just as quick and brutal as it should be. I'd like to see more of these guys!


    And now: guh! This one took longer than I wanted (yeah, yeah, what else is new?), but it's done. For the moment, anyway. Comments/critique much appreciated.

    Shopping
    Or: This is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things
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    As soon as the crowd thins enough for us not to be overheard, Filbert murmurs, "Nim has an Artifact in the river, right under the center of the bridge. It is fortunate that we were delayed there, or I might have missed it."

    "Why are they always so public?" I growl. "Or underwater? Or both? Anywhere else in the city would be better."

    "Well," Filbert replies with a placid smirk, "There's one of mine at the very top of the Cathedral." He nods to the massive spire rising abruptly from the center of Joseph's Gap. "Inside, not strapped to the outside or anything. It moves around occasionally."

    I shade my eyes and squint to look at it and realize there's no way the Hand's personal chambers aren't right at the top. "Okay, I take it back. That's worse."

    Filbert opens his mouth to respond, but Nim cuts him off, grabbing Namia’s hand and tugging her back in the direction of the river. "We'll get that one later. I'm gonna go find mine! Come on, Namia, I might need water breathing or something!"

    Charlize’s eyes narrow and her lips press into a thin line. "Nim, it is the middle of the day and there is particularly heavy traffic over that bridge, now that we've panicked the populace so much in the last couple weeks. We can search the river tonight, when we won't be in plain view of anyone with eyes."

    Charlize's argument, like anyone's, has no effect on Nim at all. "No, don't worry about it; there's lots of scrub down there; no one will be able to see a thing. Besides, it's me!" He grins. "Meet us by the south bank when you're done with all the boring stuff!" He finally succeeds in dislodging Namia and runs off with her, skirting the crowds of brown-robed pilgrims and disappearing around an unsturdy-looking shed. With a sigh, I turn to Filbert, then meet Charlize’s eyes that are not hers--clearest green rather than sparkling, all-too-recognizable silver. "Well, let's get the boring stuff done fast, I guess."

    *

    We find an inn with available rooms in a less crowded part of town, not particularly close to the Cathedral or market, and get keys to a pair of rooms side-by-side. After ensuring the doors lock, Filbert dons his blindfold and we leave the Rusty Ram for the market.

    Once there, Filbert and I make for a gentleman's formalwear boutique while Charlize heads in the direction of a dress shop we certainly can't afford anything at. I make a point of leaving Filbert in the square--inappropriate to bring my “servant” into a boutique like this. As I make small talk with the doorman, I catch sight of Charlize disappearing into an alley. Moments later, a stunning blonde in a bright red dress with a dragon motif emerges from the same spot. My heart stutters for an instant before I realize what she’s done, and I smirk to myself and follow the doorman into the shop.

    *

    I step back into the street, blinking in the sudden sunlight and scowling at having spent almost a quarter of our wealth on one untailored suit for Nim. Then I sigh, tuck the bundle of soft, slippery green cloth under one arm, and hurry to the center of the square, where a crowd has gathered to watch a young paladin raging at an insolent blind monk.

    Pushing a couple civilians roughly aside, I interrupt the red-faced paladin before he draws steel on Filbert. "What is the meaning of this?" I demand as indignantly as possible. "This man is my servant; why have you accosted him in the middle of town?"

    "This man," spits the paladin, "has the foulest tongue of any dog in Bloodport! He was shouting the most obscene vulgarities you've ever dreamed at an upstanding young Lady who happened to be passing by. I will not have such impiety in my city, especially from one who claims to be a man of the cloth! He must--"

    "He is my servant," I break in over the furious man's tirade, "and I will see to it that he behaves." The paladin is panting and shaking with the effort of restraining himself, and I turn slowly from him to Filbert. "Now, tell me. Are this man's accusations true?" Obviously the soldier had just decided to exert some authority over someone he perceived as helpless. Filbert's not the person out of line here.

    "Yes, it's true." Filbert says it so matter-of-factly I hardly even notice, until the paladin loses control of his anger again.

    "There, you see! He admits it! What a base, lecherous--"

    "Yes, clearly," I snap, a little quicker than I intended. "Well, then. Arms out; take what you've earned."

    Filbert complies, pulling his sleeves back to reveal arms as heavily tattooed as they are muscled. He sighs and makes an inscrutable face. I cannot believe he is treating this so lightly.

    In a flash, I pull Honor Bound from its sheath beneath my cloak, bringing it down in two curved strokes across Filbert's upper arms and sheathing it again just as quickly. The magic of the blade prevents it from doing any serious harm, but the long slashes draw blood, hopefully enough to satisfy the overzealous prosecutor.

    Filbert's acting skills are just as terrible as ever, though, or his training is too deeply-learned. He doesn't even flinch as the cuts open on his arms, and the paladin notices. "His arms are too scarred already! He can't even feel them! Here," he says, "use this." My stomach turns as a wicked grin crawls over his face and he swings his pack off his shoulder and pulls it open, offering it expectantly toward me, waiting for me to look inside.

    His smile broadens as I peer into the bag and see a thick club of solid iron occupying most of the space within, along with several pairs of manacles. Holding back a resigned sigh, I reach in and draw the cudgel out. Turning to Filbert with the heavy weapon, cold through my glove, I keep the apology out of my voice and pray he'll fall as I step into the swing. "You brought this on yourself."

    The metal hits his stomach with a wet sound and Filbert buckles over it, landing in a heap in the dirt. I hand the club back to the paladin, who could win a commendation for how smug he looks. I toss the expensive green fabric balled in my left fist at Filbert and turn away. "Get up and bring those! We're done here."
    Last edited by Dr Bwaa; 2012-04-19 at 09:56 AM. Reason: Scumbag brain only notices incongruities after I post them in a public forum.
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    Default Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting

    Quote Originally Posted by lordhenry4000 View Post
    Why? Is there something special about this one, or is he just generally willing to give people a chance?
    The latter.

    Quote Originally Posted by lordhenry4000 View Post
    I'm assuming "treated" is an extra word here.
    Whoops!

    Quote Originally Posted by lordhenry4000 View Post
    I can see how their numbers would have been drastically reduced! How are there any left at all?!
    That's a mystery Shen hasn't figured out yet.

    Quote Originally Posted by lordhenry4000 View Post
    A couple things about this. First, this sentence doesn't really flow with the rest of the fight; I think it could be reworked to mesh better or even taken out entirely. Also a nitpick: the part I quoted above is a garden-path sentence. It sounds as though "steel armor" is supposed to be an example of the kinds of blows it's enchanted to turn away, until you get to the end and realize that interpretation doesn't make sense.
    Spruced it up a bit. See if you can make heads or tails of it now.

    Quote Originally Posted by lordhenry4000 View Post
    Uh... oh my. I wasn't expecting that. Again I have to ask, how does this culture still exist???
    If Shen finds out, I'll be sure and post it.

    Quote Originally Posted by lordhenry4000 View Post
    This was a fun read; you do a very good job setting the scene and the fight is just as quick and brutal as it should be. I'd like to see more of these guys!
    Thanks!

    Also, I was amused by your story, especially toward the end.
    Last edited by TheCountAlucard; 2012-04-10 at 01:22 PM.
    He understands - more than the others do, at any rate. We don't talk much, and the silence speaks
    volumes. (Thanks to Gnomish Wanderer for the Nosferatu avatar! )

    Wanna see what all this Exalted stuff is about? Here's a primer!

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