Advice on giant spider hunting

[Soris Atham]

Hunting giant spiders is a tricky buisness. I have a few points to share, just in case you find yourself in one of these encounters.

Be aware: Spiders rely on stealth and surprise. When you're the "point man" in the group, look for anything that isn't part of the natural terrian. Also, keep in mind that giant spiders may not be on the ground; check the ceiling, walls or anywhere a spider may hide.

Communication: If you see something, say something. Tell your group, no matter how trivial it may be. It could save a life.

Don't touch it: Trap-door spiders are known for leaving trinkets out in the open for unsuspecting prey. These items have a thin strand of webbing attached to alert them to your pressence.

Use terrian to your advantage: When possible, retreat to an archway or narrow passage, so you only have to fight one beastie at a time.

Fire is your friend: Just like any large animal, they are afraid of fire. Make sure you have plenty of torches/fire spells available.

Accept the fact that you will get biten: Bring with you at least one anti-venom potion and a small, sharp blade. Cut the bite wound open and wash out as much of the poison as you can.

Mark the entrance: Before leaving a spider lair, take a piece of chalk or charcoal and clearly mark the area as a warning to others.

-I hope this helps and good hunting!

[The Succubus]

I'm reliably informed that spiders in Australia carry semi automatics and eat cars.

[Traab]

I'm reliably informed that spiders in Australia carry semi automatics and eat cars.

Its not so much that they eat cars as they think of them as peanut shells. They are an annoyance to pop open, but hold delicious snacks inside.

[Kneenibble]

Giant spiders have the right to privacy and the pursuit of happiness too, by Jimmy. They also have the right to go about their business in their own forests without being called denigrating slurs, such as Attercops and Old Tomnoddies.

[Rising Phoenix]

Giant spiders have the right to privacy and the pursuit of happiness too, by Jimmy. They also have the right to go about their business in their own forests without being called denigrating slurs, such as Attercops and Old Tomnoddies.

You are obviously than a giant spider than typing away at a PC with several of your 8+ furry appendages .


But as an Aussie I can say that our spiders are mostly harmless so long as you leave them alone.

[Traab]

You are obviously than a giant spider than typing away at a PC with several of your 8+ furry appendages .


But as an Aussie I can say that our spiders are mostly harmless so long as you leave them alone.

The problem is, by avoiding the spiders you stumble over the snakes. Manage to avoid them and you find crocodiles. If you somehow manage to hopscotch your way around all three you have venomous sheep trying to kill you. Thank god Aussie kids are born with body armor. Its the only way the population survives to this day.

[Weezer]

The problem is, by avoiding the spiders you stumble over the snakes. Manage to avoid them and you find crocodiles. If you somehow manage to hopscotch your way around all three you have venomous sheep trying to kill you. Thank god Aussie kids are born with body armor. Its the only way the population survives to this day.

I think you forgot the drop bears

[Skeppio]

I'm reliably informed that spiders in Australia carry semi automatics and eat cars.

You are misinformed. Cars don't scream or feel pain anywhere near enough to provide an Australian spider with an adequate meal of suffering.

[Mewtarthio]

You forgot the most important rule: Remember, 70% of all giant spider-related fatalities can be traced back to hubris, so never attempt to capture the giant spiders for breeding or bioengineering purposes. Not even if they give their consent. Especially not then.

[snoopy13a]

In order to go spider-hunting one needs:

1) The One Ring to Rule Them All
2) A Magical Sword of some sorts. A Magical Dagger suffices if you are a hobbit, such as myself (see attached potrait).

[Traab]

I think you forgot the drop bears

Well YEAH the drop bears, but I didnt include them since only a natural born Australian tends to live long enough to run into one of their migration patterns. So they already know about them, and visitors wont survive long enough to see them, so there is no point in mentioning them.

[polity4life]

In my experience, having a pistol with a telescoping barrel a la the Joker circa 1989 is a boon. It's convenient for two purposes:

Firstly, when compacted, it is a a regular, large caliber pistol with added girth. To quote the weapon enthusiast Boris the Blade (a.k.a. Boris the Bullet Dodger), "Heavy is good. Heavy is reliable. If it doesn't work, you can always hit them with it." When you're not taking short-range shots, your pistol whip can do an extra 1d4. Be sure to bring an extra d4 so you can leverage this bonus.

Secondly, when the barrel is extended, this firearm can shoot down jet-propelled aircraft with ease. The extra barrel length adds like 4000 lbs of force to your bullet because science. If a plane can be taken down, you can be sure that a giant spider will at least limp away after you plug it a couple times.

Obviously, only the bold will attempt to kill a giant spider with this gun. Use with caution. For greater effect, use while wearing a purple velvet coat.

[nedz]

Doesn't Oz have those trees which like to drop their limbs on sunny days, just when you are most likely to be seeking the protection of their shade ?
Just lure your giant spider under one of these and let Fangorn do his thing.

[Asta Kask]

In order to go spider-hunting one needs:

1) The One Ring to Rule Them All

Would the Ring of Gyges work?

[Rising Phoenix]

Guys, guys, guys!

You are forgetting hoop snakes... and the bunyip...

[Kneenibble]

You are obviously than a giant spider than typing away at a PC with several of your 8+ furry appendages .

How can you suggest such a thing! I oughta wrap you in silk and slurp up your fluids!

[The Succubus]

How can you suggest such a thing! I oughta wrap you in silk and slurp up your fluids!

Oh my. At least have the courtesy to take him on a date first!

[Geostationary]

Oh my. At least have the courtesy to take him on a date first!

Step one: Invite spider on date. Be sure to be polite and try not to come on too strongly. Dinner and a movie is a common technique; the spider may suggest that you do it at their place- this is to be expected. Agree as to not arouse suspicion.

Step two: Once on date, make sure you have concealed on your person no less than five knives.

Step three: Make sure to make proper small talk, while avoiding topics like religion, politics, and androphagy. Should either party start putting the moves on the other, make sure to continue while avoiding kissing, as this leads to loss of body fluids. Good times to initiate include during the film or during/immediately after dinner. Bringing your intoxicant of choice may smooth things along appreciably. Mention how you're into bondage of some description.

Step four: Let the spider wrap you in silk. Next, distract it, preferably with fire or a fortuitously timed door-to-door salesman. While they're distracted, cut yourself free.

Step five: Lie prone in the silk until the spider returns to slurp up your fluids. At this point, you should ambush the spider and wrestle it with your bare hands and/or any concealed weapons. This technique is only advisable if you are a native Australian or have very particular fetishes.

[Rising Phoenix]

Hahahahaha, you guys are gold XD.

[thubby]

The problem is, by avoiding the spiders you stumble over the snakes. Manage to avoid them and you find crocodiles. If you somehow manage to hopscotch your way around all three you have venomous sheep trying to kill you.

if by some miracle you survive all that, the walls try and eat you

[Jay R]

There are two crucial rules for hunting spiders.

1. Bring plenty of bait.

2. Always refer to the bait as a "point man" when he can hear you.

[Archonic Energy]

five words.

nuke the site from orbit.


only way to be sure.

[Traab]

On a more serious note, are the australians on the board bothered by us talking about how deadly of a country they live in? Or amused by the exaggeration?

[Drakeburn]

Well, there were some incidents in the garage where my folks have found more than 3 Black Widows.

My advice in giant spider hunting:

1. Prepare yourself. To prevent any nasty surprises (such as the spiders finding YOU first), it is a good idea to put on a long sleeved shirt, gloves, pants, long socks, and boots if you like to. Ski mask and goggles are optional.
And make sure that your clothes are tucked in for further safety measures.
And make sure you arm yourself with something appropriate to kill the spider with (rolled-up newspaper, a shoe, etc).

2. Hunt down that spider. Spiders tend to hide in dark and undisturbed places. If there is webbing there, there is a spider there as well.

3. Kill it! Of course you kill the spider when you find it. As step 1 says, kill it with something appropriate. Killing it with a hammer might cause collateral damage. And if you happen to find an egg sac, GET RID OF IT IMMEDIATELY!
Alternative: Trap the spider in a glass jar, or any container, and take it outside.

Well, that's all I got for now. I hope that helps.

[Lea Plath]

Don't.

And this is coming from the spider girl herself D:

[Soris Atham]

Don't.

And this is coming from the spider girl herself D:

Sorry, Lea. I meant no offence.

[Heliomance]

Don't.

And this is coming from the spider girl herself D:

LEA!

Where have you been?!
I'm totally asking because I missed you and not to try and track down any giant spider nests you may have visited

[Lea Plath]

LEA!

Where have you been?!
I'm totally asking because I missed you and not to try and track down any giant spider nests you may have visited

Where haven't I been :B
...
Lots of places, actually.

I've been hanging around in the M:tG thread and facebook and stuff, and totally not capturing cute people and wrapping them up in silk and devouring them.

How about you, Heliomance. Have you been eating well and when do you sleep :P

[Rising Phoenix]

On a more serious note, are the australians on the board bothered by us talking about how deadly of a country they live in? Or amused by the exaggeration?

The scary thing is that some people believe these things. I've convinced Taiwanese tourists that drop bears are real...

The thing that can kill you very quickly in Australia is the heat, however.

[KuReshtin]

The Drop Bears are as mythical and rare as the Scottish Wild Haggis.

And obviously everyone knows how to hunt for Haggis, right? You just have to figure out if the one you're chasing is the male or female gender and then approach it head on, and scare it so it turns around and tries to run the other way. This has the effect, since they live on the hillsides and have evolved so that the valleyside leg is longer than the topside leg, that they topple over when they try to go the wrong way that they're used to, and they tumble down the hill where your hunting buddies catch them.

Haggis is delicious, by the way.