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  1. - Top - End - #571
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Elemental's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *There is no set of circumstances in which attempting to steal a deity's personal weapon in order to destroy their creations won't result in them ruthlessly hunting you down.
    Last edited by Elemental; 2012-05-15 at 07:08 AM.
    Mauve Shirt, Savannah, Gnomish Wanderer, Cuthalion and Smuchmuch get cookies for making me avatars. (::)
    Current avatar by Smuchmuch. (::)

    Co Founder of LUTAS - For all your less than useful heroes out there.

    My Deviant Art. Careful, it's full of ponies.

    Dragons!

  2. - Top - End - #572
    Ettin in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Elemental View Post
    *There is no set of circumstances in which attempting to steal a deity's personal weapon in order to destroy their creations won't result in them ruthlessly hunting you down.
    ** Except for sufficiently high social skill modifiers/pools, which I therefore may not have.
    Revan avatar by kaptainkrutch.
    Quote Originally Posted by Cirrylius View Post
    That's how wizards beta test their new animals. If it survives Australia, it's a go. Which in hindsight explains a LOT about Australia.

  3. - Top - End - #573
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    Elemental's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Sith_Happens View Post
    ** Except for sufficiently high social skill modifiers/pools, which I therefore may not have.
    ***From now on... The number of points in each deity's sense motive is larger than the number of atoms in the entirety of creation.
    Mauve Shirt, Savannah, Gnomish Wanderer, Cuthalion and Smuchmuch get cookies for making me avatars. (::)
    Current avatar by Smuchmuch. (::)

    Co Founder of LUTAS - For all your less than useful heroes out there.

    My Deviant Art. Careful, it's full of ponies.

    Dragons!

  4. - Top - End - #574
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    Omeganaut's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *Gnomes may be strange, but they are not THAT strange
    **It is not Gnomish tradition to carry around every head of every enemy you have ever slain. Especially those in your backstory
    **It is also not Gnomish tradition to keep their spleens
    **Gnomish Parents do not leave brawny children in an electrified cage to die alla Sparta
    **Gnomes are not part orc
    **Gnomes do not have big feet and the prowess associated with such
    ***My Gnome Characters are no longer allowed to have positive CHA modifiers
    ***Gnomes are no longer allowed to get a 20 on every social roll despite the above disclaimer
    ****I am no longer allowed to play gnomes
    *****Substituting halflings and playing one like I play a gnome is also banned
    ******DM will not choose my race
    *******DM will also create my backstory and the culture of my race
    ********Not allowed to suddenly decided my race's established culture is stupid and become a Goblinabal.
    ********Canabalism does not turn you into a projectile for siege weapons.
    Last edited by Omeganaut; 2012-05-15 at 08:55 AM.
    I have returned, and plan on focusing on world-building. Issues are being dealt with.

    Quote Originally Posted by MesiDoomstalker View Post
    Thread won! I don't think I have the authority to do that but whatever

  5. - Top - End - #575
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    Doorhandle's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    From the end of the elemental eye.



    *Not to complain if a campaign is ENDED in a tavern.
    * if the D.M is suing an Aboleth to represent an Ox, not to start a speal on the detrimental effects of thaumatic radiation
    *When a cart accident happens outside, our first priority should be to heal the victims, not take their stuff.
    *If a spider is larger than a Doberman and staring at me, not to refer to it as an Australian spider.
    *Nor is it a Mongolian jumping spider when it leaps at a player.
    *The ranger cannot stab someone and pull him into a bush, assassin’s-creed style.
    * We are to avoid causing property damage by smashing out the window in order to leap into battle.
    **The windows are made of lead-reinforced diamond-glass. This discussion is closed.
    *** Cannot heckle by stating that lead is actually a weak metal.
    *It is assumed that healing the tank is the first priority, not the last one.
    **This applies to your own survival.
    *If the wizard makes an illusionary pit, not to quote Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff
    *Even with supreme flurry, there is a place where one monk’s fist ends and another begins, thank you.
    *Reincarnating enemies do not need to be buried upside-down at a crossroads.
    *Not to pout when I am healed last.
    *The D.M is not to use an enemy that feigns death ever again.
    **Especially if it happens so many times that it’s abundantly clear to everyone the barstard was faking even without metagaming.
    *** D.M is not to complain when we abuse Area-of-effect attacks to finally KILL that mosntosity.
    ****Hidesously mauling the corpse of the drow with my monk’s bare hands is welcome, but not encouraged.
    Have a deviantart!
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    Quote Originally Posted by Craft (Cheese) View Post
    "In his free time, he gates in Balors just so he can kill and eat them later!"

  6. - Top - End - #576
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Time Shenanigans abound.


    * Using Temporal Stasis to create a 'Museum' of enemies encountered should not be the central goal of any character.

    * Enemies affected by Temporal Stasis cannot be used as shields even if they are impervious to all damage, spells, and effects.
    ** This also extents to any kind of use as armor or weapons.
    *** Nor can they be used as battering rams or siege ammunition.
    **** Using them as a boat or other vehicle is apparently permitted though, as is using them as braces to support a falling building.

    * Casting Irresistible Dance on an enemy before casting Temporal Stasis 'just because I can' is not encouraged.

    * Any character that can force a target to make more than 2 saves versus Temporal Stasis on the same round is no longer allowed.


    * Readying Time Stop for when the enemy army charges just to place Immovable Rods in front of their charging horses is considered bad form.

  7. - Top - End - #577
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by GreenZ View Post
    Time Shenanigans abound.


    * Using Temporal Stasis to create a 'Museum' of enemies encountered should not be the central goal of any character.

    * Enemies affected by Temporal Stasis cannot be used as shields even if they are impervious to all damage, spells, and effects.
    ** This also extents to any kind of use as armor or weapons.
    *** Nor can they be used as battering rams or siege ammunition.
    **** Using them as a boat or other vehicle is apparently permitted though, as is using them as braces to support a falling building.

    * Casting Irresistible Dance on an enemy before casting Temporal Stasis 'just because I can' is not encouraged.

    * Any character that can force a target to make more than 2 saves versus Temporal Stasis on the same round is no longer allowed.


    * Readying Time Stop for when the enemy army charges just to place Immovable Rods in front of their charging horses is considered bad form.
    Id call that last one good planning

    *not allowed to use the Pseudonatural Creature template
    **especially not the Epic Handbook version
    *** Chuck Norris is not a Template
    Amazing Jack avatar by Tiffanie Lirle

    Back after a long break! probably wont be as active as i used to be, but i missed the games

    Aarco

  8. - Top - End - #578
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    Sith_Happens's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by GreenZ View Post
    * Readying Time Stop for when the enemy army charges just to place Immovable Rods in front of their crotches is considered bad form.
    Fixed that for you.
    Revan avatar by kaptainkrutch.
    Quote Originally Posted by Cirrylius View Post
    That's how wizards beta test their new animals. If it survives Australia, it's a go. Which in hindsight explains a LOT about Australia.

  9. - Top - End - #579
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    Metahuman1's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    * Under No Circumstances my any character ever have anything that even remotely reminds anyone or makes anyone think of anything or one form the seventy's except Star Wars and Dungeons and Dragons.

    *Especially Disco.

    **Even if I'm the Bard.

    *** Even if it fits the setting and Campaign.

    ****Especially if I'm NOT the Bard and I'm using it to fuel mechanical ability's of any kind.

    *Breaking the above gives the DM and my party blanket permission to to unleash things that would make HP Lovecraft loose his lunch on that character none stop until I roll a character that doesn't involve Disco or the seventy's, with the exceptions of Dungeons and Dragons and Star Wars.
    "I Burn!"

  10. - Top - End - #580
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    There will be no German Sparkle Parties. Ever. No, not even in a temple of Cayden.

  11. - Top - End - #581
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    * I may not suggest we base our characters off the cast of Twilight as dwarves.
    ** Sparkly dwarves might make sense. I am still forbidden from using them in the game where I suggested the above.
    ** Wolfdwarves are entirely acceptable. They do not, however, have significantly less hair in wolf form than in dwarf form.
    *** Wolfdwarves do not get charisma bonuses.
    ** If we disregard the above, the vampire and werewolf are not to jockey for favor with the rest of the party.
    *** Dividing into two teams because said jockeying has gotten out of hand is right out.
    **** Having more weapons to kill my allies than my enemies is considered poor form.
    ***** No, it doesn't make me batman.
    Dragontar by Serpentine.

    Now offering unsolicited advice.

  12. - Top - End - #582
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    Yoven's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *If i meet a ranger running away from a cave for his life, i should not shout into the cave to wait for an echo.... (just wanted to know how big it was)
    * even more so if i hear something scratching inside
    *I shouldn't be surprised if my lvl 2 Druid faces A basilisk coming out form said cave, just because it heared me shouting...
    --------Not a native Speaker-------

  13. - Top - End - #583
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    Sgt. Cookie's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *No matter how high my perform modifer is, my Bard cannot summon a burning zepplin of lead.
    Open the lid and snatch a homebrewed treat from Cookie's Jar

    Ponytar by Dirtytabs

    Like the look of the Prestige Bard/Paladin/Ranger, but don't know how best to use them? There's a guide for that.

  14. - Top - End - #584
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    Omeganaut's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *Gnomes are smart enough not to even try to make zeppelins out of lead.
    **No, not allowed to make zeppelins covered in LED's either. Those don't exist in a fantasy setting.
    **Just because they did it on mythbusters DOES NOT mean it works in D&D. Period.
    ***No longer allowed to watch Mythbusters within 2 hours of doing anything D&D related.
    ***I may break that rule if it is discovered that every single character I have is based off of that show, but their shenanigans are still banned.

    Quote Originally Posted by Kane0 View Post
    There will be no German Sparkle Parties. Ever. No, not even in a temple of Cayden.
    *Gnomish sparkle parties will be destroyed with rocks and fire.
    I have returned, and plan on focusing on world-building. Issues are being dealt with.

    Quote Originally Posted by MesiDoomstalker View Post
    Thread won! I don't think I have the authority to do that but whatever

  15. - Top - End - #585
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    Doorhandle's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    The one-piece D20 system has released a beta! Let’s celebrate it’s glitchyness before they fix it! *ahem*

    Reasons Great Captain Doorhandle is no longer allowed to be on the grand line:

    *Arrrs, Arrghs, and yohohos are to be kept to 3/session each.
    *The one-piece is not, in fact, a Speedo.
    * No matter what Franky wants to think.
    * The east blue is not a low-level tutorial zone.
    * The new-world is not a high-level raid dungeon.
    *Cannot have the goal of going to the grand-line in order to “level-grind”
    *while little is actually stopping your swordsman from dual-wielding Zoro-style or Masumeme-style, I am to be aware that there is little benefit for additional swords beyond the first.
    * So using 20 is just ASKING for a nutpunch.
    *Swordchucks are right ou- actually they fit right in, go ahead.
    *there is not a class called the Mohawk, nor one called the Budgie Smuggler.
    *Just because Oda gives anyone more impressive than a mook a back-story and motivations doesn’t mean you G.M will, so stop poking the NPCs!
    *If I am playing a colossal-size giant, can’t volunteer to be the boat.
    * Even if I’m a cyborg giant with all the necessary facilities.
    *Cannot convince the entire crew to all play fishmen or merpeople, and just swim from island to island.
    *there is no such thing as the “Davy Jones' Lockeroom” where all the attractive merpeople get changed, and it cannot be my goal to find it.
    * There is no method by which you can make a sea king your mount, giant or no.
    *Making a sea-king CHARIOT is right out, even if you use the entire boat!
    * Kuja may not know where babies come from or what this earth thing called kissing is, but even so I am not to tell every one I meet this at great length.
    *Demonstrating is right out.
    *Kuja snakes can be used as longbows, staves, and whips. Not muskets, bazookas, or chainsaws.
    *The wonderful world of Yuri is to be forever locked away from Amazon Lily.
    *fishmen do not flop like fish, although they do talk like people.
    *The fishman member of the crew does not flinch at the mention of “catch of the day”.
    * Also, he has nothing to do with Davey Jones, so you cans stop asking about the heart, already!
    *The merman rouge does not take a penalty on bluff checks because “Something’s fishy here.”
    * Sky tribesmen are not elves, even if some of them share the same stat-bonuses.
    *sky-knights are not dragoons.
    *Not to tell sky-tribesmen to dial it down.
    *Cyborgs may or may not be full of useful devices.
    *If playing a Cyborg, cannot be a gundam of any size.
    * Keep the “ROKKETO PAWNCH” to a minimum, please.
    *no cyborg is fueled by beer, even if one is fuelled by cola.
    *cyborgs do not have a racial enmity towards those who have eaten a zoan fruit.
    *Cyborgs do not have a vibrate function: it is wrong to tell Kuja this.
    *The city of Armada does not reside anywhere NEAR the grand line, let alone the rest of one-piece.
    *on the same note, Cyborgs are not the remade, and fishmen are not Grindlylow.
    *May not take the shot-on the run feat for every feat until you can make one shot with a 20+ bonus to hit and damage, while moving 200ft while you’re at it.
    * May not take whirling frenzy and rage and use them both at once, even if nothing says I can’t.
    *No, that is not gear third OR second.
    *If am playing a warrior, my taunt cannot be made entirely of your-mother jokes.
    *My brawler is not Chuck Norris, even if he can roundhouse-kick for 3d8 extra damage.
    *Before using the launch feat to toss my allies around, I am to ask if they WANT to be launched first.
    *My specialist’s weapon cannot work based on troll science.
    * The specialist is not a “wizzzurd.”
    * My specialist’s weapon is not “her presssiousss.”
    *Cannot ever make kraken cannon.
    *Even if “sodgeking” means “sniper-king” and thus that means Usop is “Sniperking, king of snipers”, this does not mean my marksman can be “Gunlord, lord of guns”
    *As above, cannot wield 2 guns in each hand and one in my mouth, pulling the trigger with my tongue.
    *Actually, I MAY carry a cannon around for a weapon. It is, however, assumed I will shoot it and not just us it as a club.
    * Even if Oda is famous for his nonsensical explanations for things like how Zoro can talk with a mouthful of sword, I am not to assume the same applies for things like, say, gravity.
    *not matter how crunchy or delicious they may look, cannot use the Cook feat to kill and prepare mermaid or fishmen to eat.
    * Successful cooking a shoe to eat is adequate when supplies are low on long journeys. Making it you main source of food and income is right out.
    *Not to learn how to cook gold to save hull-space after a successful venture.
    *Cannot make a Devil-fruit smoothie, and it is assumed drinking it will kill me rather than getting all their powers combined.
    * The only safe way to cook devil fruit is to leave it in a broth with a rock for 3 weeks, stirring it vigorously with an eggwhisk thrice a day, and then eating the rock.
    * Cannot cook and eat c’thulhu.
    * If someone is playing a shipwright, cannot play a shipwrong.
    *My shipwright may be a relation-shipper, but he still cannot apply shipbuilding-rolls to seduction checks.
    * Not matter the roll, cannot make the ship into a transforming robot.
    * Cannot use coupe-de-blast to launch the ENTIRE ship at people and let velocity do the rest.
    *cannot add SFX so it sounds like Shao khan is yelling “WICKEDSICK every time the burst is used.
    *There is no combination of fishman karate, dials, coupe-de-blast, devil-fruit powers, cyborg powers, the Geppo feat or the launch feat that will let us launch our boat into orbit.
    *chicken voyage is an emergency mauver for dodging lethal hits. It is not to be used to sneak into a parking line before anyone else.
    *The beam attack is not a wave-motion gun, a starlight breaker, or a Hadoken.
    *not to use the beam on every foe we come across.
    *Cannot attack a smaller ship to the top of a larger ship so that we can shoot 2 beams at once.
    * Cannot build an aircraft-carrier for the purpose of launching smaller-ships at people.
    *Yes, you may launch your friends out of cannons. However, there is NO cannon big enough to launch a whole ship at someone.
    *I make a giant cannon, it is assumed it launches giant cannonballs and not giants (unless the giant is one of your aforementioned friends.)
    *Cannons may not shoot cannons.
    *I am not to consider the ramifications of making Gatling-cannon.
    * May not make a cannon so big it that the boat is a ship attached to a cannon, and not the other-way round.
    *even if it would fit with the setting, making any cannon inspired by worms: forts under siege is vetoed.
    *Mahogany may be the wood with the most D.R, but even so it is not from the 300-ft fire-breathing trees of Malchior 7, or infused with the blood runes of it’s people.
    *Thus the ship cannot warp reality, even if it is nigh-indestructible.
    * Archaeologists do not have whip-proficiency by default.
    *If I am a marine, not to ask how wearing the uniform somehow gives me a better armour bonus than the guy in full plate.
    *I am not a “spesss” marine and I have not “fehild the emperor.”
    *If I am playing a marine in a group of pirates or vice-versa, not to rub it into my nakama’s faces all the time.
    * There are no ninja, and they are not “always chaotic evil”
    * Pirates do not have “favoured enemy: ninja”… but that should REALLY be a feat for them.
    * Cannot do what I want in ignorance of Rule 0 ‘cause a pirate is FREE!
    *Loosing redundant limbs or facial features does not cause a pirate to gain power based on the number of organs lost.
    * Not to insist on being introduced as "Captain Jack sparrow."
    *cannot put ranks in “Captain Jack sparrow.”
    *The musician cannot have Perform: (metal), and the DON! Feat does not work by melting the enemies’ face off.
    *Even if you bring Alestorm music track to the table.
    *if I am a scientist, I can learn to make seastone. Not allowed to make armour out of the stuff.
    *Genetically engineering devil fruit is an exercise in suicide.
    * Inanimate objects can somehow eat devil-fruit, yes. This does not mean I can feed a fruit to a fruit so you can fruit while you fruit, you fruit.
    *not to rig the devil-fruit random-selection process by filing it with synonyms of the word “god.”
    *there is no fruit-fruit fruit and it cannot let me extrude devil fruit in turn.
    *neither devil-fruit nor a fruit-user are “magically delicious.”
    *Not to carry about a devil-fruit with the sole intention of feeding it to the next fruit-user I find, thus killing him.
    *feeding it to a fishman or mermaid is against the Geneva Convention.
    *As a Kuja, cannot feed a devil-fruit to my Kuja snake and THEN use it as a bazooka.
    *Cannot gain the power “screw with the D.M”
    *If I eat the sea-stone sea-stone fruit, it is assumed I collapse into a paralytic fit and die, not that I become a godless killing machine capable of destroying mortal and fruit-user alike.
    * If I eat a logia fruit and thus can become liquid, this does not mean I can hide in a soda bottle. Or in hand-sanitizer. Or in a toilet.
    *…Or inside someone’s delicious squishmeats.
    *Not to contemplate the ramifications of staying in the squishmeats for too long. In addition, your G.M now needs to eat the bleach-bleach fruit.
    *Cannot have the seawater logia fruit. THAT’S CHEATING!
    *Logia fruits do not work like the cursed-springs of Ranma one-half, and thus I will not change back after being splashed with water.
    * Cannot have any of the logia elements following: Base, surprise, Orange-transparent chainsaw, oestrogen, laser, cheese, or Mohawk.
    * I do not need to get one logia fruit user of every element together to summon captain planet.
    *Cannot have the “theft-theft fruit.” That one has already been stolen by Carmen Sandieago, anyway.
    *May not eat the punch-punch fruit, or the beefsteak-mc-manly fruit.
    * The heart-heart fruit isn’t useless! So stop whining!
    *If I eat a Zoan fruit it does not make me a furry.
    *In this vein, there is not such thing as a “brony-brony fruit.”
    *There are not 649 different zoan fruits in the world, and you do not have to “catch-them-all.”
    *Zoan fruits can be based on dinosaurs and creatures from myth. This does not mean you can have the “Beholder-beholder” fruit or the “Godzilla Godzilla fruit.” (Although that could be awesome…)
    *If I eat the narwhal-narwhal fruit, it does not give me “a kickass facial horn” or make me “The Jedi of the sea,” although I may beat a polar-bear in a fight or stop C’thlhu eating ye.
    * Not to question the point of having a zoan fruit that lets you turn into a fish.
    * Cannot ask a fruit-user “have you tried… not eating a devil fruit?”
    * Fruit users are not lemmings, even if Luffy, Chopper, and Brook have proven otherwise.

    Find it here! And find more game-breakers too, it still needs some beta-testing.
    Last edited by Doorhandle; 2012-05-19 at 09:24 PM.
    Have a deviantart!
    Can't write. Can't plan. Can draw a little.
    Quote Originally Posted by Craft (Cheese) View Post
    "In his free time, he gates in Balors just so he can kill and eat them later!"

  16. - Top - End - #586
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    OldWizardGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *I am not the Herald of Tiamat
    **Especially not if I'm Lawful or Good aligned.
    ***Even if I'm a half-dragon
    *No longer allowed to capture and torture enemies for educational purposes.
    *Teaching someone what Pain feels like is not educational.
    **Demonstrating the difference between resistance and immunity also does not qualify.
    *Simulacrum no longer works on Gods.
    **Even dead Gods
    **Even if the material component is supplied by plot.
    *Fabricate can no longer be used on obstacles
    *Fabricate can not create "A Statue of Buddy Christ".
    *When playing a Super Hero game, Burning every person and building in the area of the crime does not count as "Compulsively leaving clues", and does not grant any bonus points.
    *A Belt of Gender Changing is not a Strapon.
    *Artificers cannot build giant mecha.
    *You cannot wear a golem
    *Golems are not power armor
    **even if you shout "For the Emperor!"
    ***The DM is not a Heretic

  17. - Top - End - #587
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Man on Fire's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *Cyborgs may or may not be full of useful devices.
    *If playing a Cyborg, cannot be a gundam of any size.
    * Keep the “ROKKETO PAWNCH” to a minimum, please.
    *no cyborg is fueled by beer, even if one is fuelled by cola.
    I like your style.

    * There must be a reason why my character is dressed like Cobra Commander
    ** "He is my hero" doesn't cut it.
    * When attacked by monstrous dogs in the middle of the night, cannot throw Molotov cocktail at them and go back to sleep.
    * Cannot describe what my character will find enjoyable about sticking a bottle up BBEG's candy anus and smashing it.
    * If another PC stolen my pants I'm about to assume he did it to show how guy thief he is, not that he's gay.
    ** Especially gay for me.
    * When going to make terrifing speech to a bunch of Orcs, I must have something more prepared than a mix of Domon Kasshu and The Rock quotes.
    * My dwarven bard is assumed to know more songs than four lines from ballad "Everything you need to know about Elves".
    ** Cannot make the Drows look like the good guys.
    *** Cannot make Elves and Drows unite to kick my a**
    Last edited by Man on Fire; 2012-05-19 at 10:17 PM.

  18. - Top - End - #588
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Arbane's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Doorhandle View Post
    *Cannot gain the power “screw with the D.M”.
    ...Because it's redundant, as all players have that one for free.
    Imagine if all real-world conversations were like internet D&D conversations...
    Protip: DnD is an incredibly social game played by some of the most socially inept people on the planet - Lev

  19. - Top - End - #589
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Devil

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    * When the raiding minions come to kidnap the teamsters and caravan guards, we are to be careful in our use of AOE effects. In particular, we are not allowed to dump half the caravan into an acid-filled pit.
    * Not allowed to blow a 5th level resurrection ability on a nameless 1st level NPC caravan guard.
    * Not allowed to debuff the minions to the point where a handful can't creditably escape with prisoners a plot hook.
    ** When the minions get past this by pulling out a wand and teleporting away with their victims, we are not to peruse the PH and determine that no such spell exists.
    *** Nor are we to conclude that we're up against an epic wand.
    **** Calling dibs on the epic wand is right out. We saw it disintegrate because it was out of charges.
    ***** Not allowed to question how we saw it disintegrate.

    * Dammit, I'm a cleric, not a wizard.
    ** No longer allowed to move 30 ft in my best armor option.
    ** No longer allowed to ignore difficult terrain.
    ** No longer allowed to teleport out of melee as a move action.
    ** No longer allowed to bypass 90 minutes of overland movement, in a time-critical situation, by way of a teleport spell. No fair getting the DM's hopes up.
    ** Nor bypass 80% of the dungeon with a dimension door spell.
    *** No longer allowed to play travel domain.

    * I am to respect the DMs cut scenes.
    ** When the villain is chanting at an altar and about to finish its summoning of a big bad evil nastiness monster, I am to amuse myself with killing his minions. No longer allowed to plant an AoE silence spell three inches in front of his face.
    *** This also applies to monologuing villains.
    **** Also questgivers and authority figures.
    ***** May not cast silence on the DM.

    * When the DM offers the entire party a Wish as a quest reward, we are to be thankful and argue over what wish to make. We are not to all shrug our shoulders, get into cyclical "I dunno, what do you want" discussions, or brainstorm for 30 minutes without coming up with anything.
    Alstroemeria in Thrair's War of the Final Whisper.
    GM of A Thin Blue Line.

    Me: How crazy it gets depends on how much expertise, adroitness, and finesse you navigate the current craziness. Stick the landing and the whole thing could be wrapped up in a bow tomorrow.
    Player: In other words... we're pretty much doomed, right?
    Me: You're not entirely doomed yet. Now I'll just be sitting back in the corner here, cackling at your next few decisions.

    I'm not an evil GM! Honest!

  20. - Top - End - #590
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    Knight13's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Doorhandle
    *I am not a “spesss” marine and I have not “fehild the emperor.”
    You mispelled "emprah".
    "Of course you should fight fire with fire. You should fight everything with fire." - Jaya Ballard, Task Mage

    There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved with a suitable application of high explosives.

    "Time to throw the dice." - Mat Cauthon, Wheel of Time

    "Nothing good can ever come from staying with normal people."

  21. - Top - End - #591
    Orc in the Playground
     
    ClericGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *I may no longer make gnomes capable of bull rushing and knocking giants prone
    **Past the crowd of hobgoblins
    ***With no attacks of opportunity
    ****in fact, gnomes are out altogether
    *I may no longer ride the skeletal dragon without a saddle
    **I am no longer allowed riding skeletons
    ***No, especially not if you call it boning

  22. - Top - End - #592
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    Doorhandle's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Ravenica View Post
    *I may no longer make gnomes capable of bull rushing and knocking giants prone
    **Past the crowd of hobgoblins
    ***With no attacks of opportunity
    ****in fact, gnomes are out altogether
    Earth-child style. Yes, you can, and it's expected that you do, in fact, trip giants of all shapes and sizes and with your bare hands no less!
    Have a deviantart!
    Can't write. Can't plan. Can draw a little.
    Quote Originally Posted by Craft (Cheese) View Post
    "In his free time, he gates in Balors just so he can kill and eat them later!"

  23. - Top - End - #593
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Devil

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    If I make a trap-monkey rogue (finding traps or ESPECIALLY setting traps), I am no longer allowed to take "mumbles" as a character flaw.

    "Don't *mumble mumble* that *mumble* or the *mumble mumble* will *mumble mumble mumble*."
    Alstroemeria in Thrair's War of the Final Whisper.
    GM of A Thin Blue Line.

    Me: How crazy it gets depends on how much expertise, adroitness, and finesse you navigate the current craziness. Stick the landing and the whole thing could be wrapped up in a bow tomorrow.
    Player: In other words... we're pretty much doomed, right?
    Me: You're not entirely doomed yet. Now I'll just be sitting back in the corner here, cackling at your next few decisions.

    I'm not an evil GM! Honest!

  24. - Top - End - #594
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *When a guard asks me to show my credentials, I am not to respond with a Silent Still Quickened Disintegrate.
    *As a DM, I am no longer allowed to use the Evil Overlord's Handbook as a guideline for my villains.
    This episode of Wasting Time with Lox has been brought to you by the letter 'ـك'.

    I'm currently working on a Homebrew Campaign Setting for D&D 3.5. Why don't you give it a look?
    Future content guaranteed to include one dozen (That's Twelve!) new races, a new base class (plus some re-worked old ones!), several brand-new prestige classes, new feats, new spells, just about a brand-new everything!

  25. - Top - End - #595
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    RedWizardGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *Whether as DM or player, I may not make the rommance subplot in the campaign as complex (for lack of a better word) as the one in Legend of Korra.

  26. - Top - End - #596
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    Morithias's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Loxagn View Post
    *As a DM, I am no longer allowed to use the Evil Overlord's Handbook as a guideline for my villains.
    ** As a PC, I am no longer allowed to use the Evil Overlord's Handbook as a guideline for my villain, and justify it as "a book a harvester devil gave me".

  27. - Top - End - #597
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    Kazyan's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *The maximum level at which I can play an Iaijutsu Master is 23.

  28. - Top - End - #598
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *No longer allowed to make a fighter/barbarian with a spiked shield and melee weapon who focuses on charging feats and the grenadier feats and dips one level into artificer so that he can make his own explosives.

    *No more characters based off of youtube videos, either.
    Last edited by TechnoScrabble; 2012-05-26 at 08:18 PM.
    GLORIOUS SOVIET SNAIL SUPERTECHNOLOGY

    Comrade L.E.S.S. by The Mad Hatter!

    Quote Originally Posted by Viper9090 View Post
    My weirdest nightmare has just been replaced.
    (Recaiden) He lives!
    (Firedaemon33) Ia! Ia! TechnoScrabble F'Taghn!
    Declared terminal 24 December, 2013. Come and get me.

  29. - Top - End - #599
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    WolfInSheepsClothing

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *My character creation battlecry is not to be "Unleash the Cheese!" in any future exercise.
    **Present exercises are exempt; there is no other acceptable phrase to denote "Hi, I'm building a young prismatic dragon spell to power erudite as a tenth level character".
    Status: Recovering. ETA: 3 days

  30. - Top - End - #600
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by NM020110 View Post
    *My character creation battlecry is not to be "Unleash the Cheese!" in any future exercise.
    **Present exercises are exempt; there is no other acceptable phrase to denote "Hi, I'm building a young prismatic dragon spell to power erudite as a tenth level character".
    *brain.exe has encountered an unexpected error. If the problem persists contact your system administrator. To restart press return*

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