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  1. - Top - End - #841
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    planswalker's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    * I may not use calculus as a metaphor for anything in DnD. Even if I use it properly, the odds that the person I am talking to will pick up on it, understand it, and properly be able to use it themselves is too slim.
    Best. Thread. Ever!

    Much thanks to Ceika for the Collin Brady Poketar!

  2. - Top - End - #842
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    Razgriez's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *No matter how much it may have seemed like a "Good idea at the time", making a pact with a red dragon is not such. At best, I might be cursed with some major disability, and soul linked to a creature that is typically high up on the "Things to kill" list of adventurers and questing knights. At worst, I'm it's next meal.

    *Note To self: Werewolf Curse in Skyrim = Awesome. Werewolf Curse anywhere else= being hunted down and/or burned at the stake

    *No matter how much I shout words in Draconic, they won't give me any special powers.

    *Shooting a party member in the knee with an arrow is neither "funny" nor a solution to handling my party arguments
    Awesome Final Fantasy XIV Dragoon custom avatar made by Iruka. Thank you very much Iruka.

  3. - Top - End - #843
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    BlueKnightGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    * Shouting words in true speech will produce special effects... they will just suck epicly
    love of mine, someday you will die,
    and I'll be close behind
    to follow you into the dark


    death cab for cutie - I will follow you into the dark

    Bleach D20 classes project - come, we wants all your brians!
    BleachD20 source book

  4. - Top - End - #844
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    SwashbucklerGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    * If we are playing by encumbrance rules, I must remember that there are effects for different levels of weight.
    ** This means that I can't walk around with a light or a heavy load just fine, and become totally immobile if I pick up an ounce over my heavy load.
    *** No, this does not mean that I can still walk around at half speed even if I'm carrying 10 tons of junk on my back…
    Proud owner of: 0.36 0.43 0.99 Internet(s), 2 Win(s), and 3000 Brownie Point(s)

    Quote Originally Posted by Welknair View Post
    *Proceeds to google "Bride of the Portable Hole", jokingly wondering if it might exist*

    *It does.*

    What.

  5. - Top - End - #845
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    NecromancerGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Ksheep View Post
    * If we are playing by encumbrance rules, I must remember that there are effects for different levels of weight.
    ** This means that I can't walk around with a light or a heavy load just fine, and become totally immobile if I pick up an ounce over my heavy load.
    *** No, this does not mean that I can still walk around at half speed even if I'm carrying 10 tons of junk on my back…
    ****No carrying items in a trashcan does NOT mitigate this. (Totally does. Not kidding try it in your fallout or elder scrolls of choice.)
    Most people see a half orc and and think barbarian warrior. Me on the other hand? I think secondary trap handler and magic item tester. Also I'm not allowed to trick the next level one wizard into starting a fist fight with a house cat no matter how annoying he is.
    Yes I know it's sarcasm. It's a joke. Pale green is for snarking
    Thread wins: 2

  6. - Top - End - #846
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    SwashbucklerGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by ryu View Post
    ****No carrying items in a trashcan does NOT mitigate this. (Totally does. Not kidding try it in your fallout or elder scrolls of choice.)
    ***** Trash cans are NOT the Poor Man's Bag of Holding
    Proud owner of: 0.36 0.43 0.99 Internet(s), 2 Win(s), and 3000 Brownie Point(s)

    Quote Originally Posted by Welknair View Post
    *Proceeds to google "Bride of the Portable Hole", jokingly wondering if it might exist*

    *It does.*

    What.

  7. - Top - End - #847
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    planswalker's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    * I may no longer try to combine the physics of any of these three realms: real life, tabletop games, or videogames
    Best. Thread. Ever!

    Much thanks to Ceika for the Collin Brady Poketar!

  8. - Top - End - #848
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    * I may no longer make villains with higher moral standards than my PCs.
    * I am definitely no longer allowed to use aforementioned moral standards to cause PvP.


    Quote Originally Posted by Chilingsworth View Post
    Wow! Not only was that awesome, I think I actually kinda understand Archeron now. If all the "intermediate" outer planes got that kind of treatment, I doubt there would be anywhere near as many critics of their utility.
    My extended homebrew sig

  9. - Top - End - #849
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *My plan for world domination is not to buy and handpick all the crops in the world only to sell them back to the farmers.

    **I already have ten thousand cabbages, I need something to do with them.

    ***Dropping them off the highest mountain on the continent and screaming "CABALANCHE" Is not cool.
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    No I did not make my own banner, it was created by a very talented person who I've lost contact with.

    I just started playing D&D, and love the game

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    First level paladin.
    STR:14
    DEX: 8
    CON: 10
    INT:13
    WIS: 12
    CHA: 16

  10. - Top - End - #850
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    NecromancerGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by newBlazingAngel View Post
    *My plan for world domination is not to buy and handpick all the crops in the world only to sell them back to the farmers.

    **I already have ten thousand cabbages, I need something to do with them.

    ***Dropping them off the highest mountain on the continent and screaming "CABALANCHE" Is not cool.
    *Replacing cabbages with all movable items in existence and a few permanently stationary ones is just mean. (Buy ALL the property!)
    Most people see a half orc and and think barbarian warrior. Me on the other hand? I think secondary trap handler and magic item tester. Also I'm not allowed to trick the next level one wizard into starting a fist fight with a house cat no matter how annoying he is.
    Yes I know it's sarcasm. It's a joke. Pale green is for snarking
    Thread wins: 2

  11. - Top - End - #851
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    newBlazingAngel's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *Combining all game science to create a helicoptor just so that I can float it a few feet above a an unsuspecting soul, jump out and scream "HELLO-COPTOR!" before the fiery explosion kill them is...awesome.
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    No I did not make my own banner, it was created by a very talented person who I've lost contact with.

    I just started playing D&D, and love the game

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    First level paladin.
    STR:14
    DEX: 8
    CON: 10
    INT:13
    WIS: 12
    CHA: 16

  12. - Top - End - #852
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    Craft (Cheese)'s Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by newBlazingAngel View Post
    *Combining all game science to create a helicoptor just so that I can float it a few feet above a an unsuspecting soul, jump out and scream "HELLO-COPTOR!" before the fiery explosion kill them is...awesome.
    ** House Lyandar airships are not helicopters.
    *** I may not make the BBEG have an extendable tentacle-arm for the sole purpose of latching onto the airships, hijacking them in midair, then crashing them into things.
    **** Know what? Just don't base anything off of Prototype anymore.

  13. - Top - End - #853
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by newBlazingAngel View Post
    ***Dropping them off the highest mountain on the continent and screaming "CABALANCHE" Is not cool.
    **** Don't even think about pulling this stunt with holiday presents.
    Quote Originally Posted by Water_Bear View Post
    That's RAW for you; 100% Rules-Legal, 110% silly.
    Quote Originally Posted by hamishspence View Post
    "Common sense" and "RAW" are not exactly on speaking terms
    Projects: Homebrew, Gentlemen's Agreement, DMPCs, Forbidden Knowledge safety, and Top Ten Worst. Also, Quotes and RACSD are good.

    Anyone knows blue is for sarcas'ing in · "Take 10 SAN damage from Dark Orchid" · Use of gray may indicate nitpicking · Green is sincerity

  14. - Top - End - #854
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    * When the BBEG makes his 'we can rule together' speech/offer thing, the correct answer is not 'hmm, actually, that makes sense. OK then.'

    (Dark Heresy, where the plot was supposed to be that our Inquisitorial master had gone too far. Only when he explained his motives and actions, my character concluded that he was actually right and promptly betrayed the rest of the party)

    * I am no longer allowed to corrupt the paladin into worshipping Asmodeus through nought more than careful reasoning. No matter how funny it is.

    * If a fellow party member has fallen in a pit of acid, I am to get him out immediately, not wait to see if he asks for help. This applies even if I am evil and he is a paladin.

    (He was apparently attempting to redeem me by getting me to perform an unasked for act of charity. Just sat there in the acid, slowly dissolving, not saying a word. Eventually I got him out, but the ranger had to threaten me into doing it, so it didn't count)

  15. - Top - End - #855
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    BlueKnightGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Maugan Ra View Post
    (He was apparently attempting to redeem me by getting me to perform an unasked for act of charity. Just sat there in the acid, slowly dissolving, not saying a word. Eventually I got him out, but the ranger had to threaten me into doing it, so it didn't count)
    pffft, thats not an act of charity. thats an act of preserving the meat shield so you don't get inured...
    love of mine, someday you will die,
    and I'll be close behind
    to follow you into the dark


    death cab for cutie - I will follow you into the dark

    Bleach D20 classes project - come, we wants all your brians!
    BleachD20 source book

  16. - Top - End - #856
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    planswalker's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    * Alignment is not an excuse for screwing over my party.
    Best. Thread. Ever!

    Much thanks to Ceika for the Collin Brady Poketar!

  17. - Top - End - #857
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    RangerGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *My party cannot be a group of bards called the S men armed with rapiers just to give us the excuse to open every battle with "Lock S Foils in attack Position"

    *I may not take weapon proficiency (whip) and fear (snakes) in the same character

    *My character may never say, "Use the Force"
    ** he may not circumvent this by saying "Use the Mass x Accelleration"

    *force choke is not a spell in DnD

    *I can't have a +42 longsword
    **it is not red
    ***nor can I have black armor, a black cape, black helmet, and breathing problems

    *my shapshifter may not open each battle with "Hulk Smash"

    *I do not get to shout "Finish Him" before each coup de grace

    *I may not have a young sidkick named short round

    *I may not take ranks in profession (archeologist)

    *I may not have a walking carpet as a sidekick
    **May not engage in bilingual dialog with him

    *My Father's name is not Harry, nor is my name Ford. Thus I may not introduce myself as "Harry's son Ford"
    Warning!! This poster makes frequent use of Sarcasm, Jokes, and Exaggeration. He intends no offense.

  18. - Top - End - #858
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    Techwarrior's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    My two bladed sword kensai/acrobat may not place brilliant energy on both of the blades.

  19. - Top - End - #859
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    WolfInSheepsClothing

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *I may no longer engage in the mass mind rape of the citizens of an allied nation without the consent of said nation and its allies.
    **Convincing said nation and its allies that the act was morally justified after the fact is to be considered poor form.
    Status: Recovering. ETA: 3 days

  20. - Top - End - #860
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    SwashbucklerGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    * May not make an awakened dog artificer with an inept commoner "master" who takes one rank in a different profession each level…
    Proud owner of: 0.36 0.43 0.99 Internet(s), 2 Win(s), and 3000 Brownie Point(s)

    Quote Originally Posted by Welknair View Post
    *Proceeds to google "Bride of the Portable Hole", jokingly wondering if it might exist*

    *It does.*

    What.

  21. - Top - End - #861
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    planswalker's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    * Half-dragon half-ogres are not a valid race choice. Especially if you try to then take aberrant feats. Only mongrelfolk are allowed to be that much of a mutt.
    Best. Thread. Ever!

    Much thanks to Ceika for the Collin Brady Poketar!

  22. - Top - End - #862
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    NecromancerGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *I am not to stack templates just to spite whatever dm is using the above rule.
    Most people see a half orc and and think barbarian warrior. Me on the other hand? I think secondary trap handler and magic item tester. Also I'm not allowed to trick the next level one wizard into starting a fist fight with a house cat no matter how annoying he is.
    Yes I know it's sarcasm. It's a joke. Pale green is for snarking
    Thread wins: 2

  23. - Top - End - #863
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    Rockphed's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Ksheep View Post
    * May not make an awakened dog artificer with an inept commoner "master" who takes one rank in a different profession each level…
    Is there an explanation for this? I feel like I should know it.
    Dragontar by Serpentine.

    Now offering unsolicited advice.

  24. - Top - End - #864
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    SwashbucklerGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Rockphed View Post
    Is there an explanation for this? I feel like I should know it.
    Wallace and Gromit, much? Probably could have added "Mustn't make complex Rube-Goldberg-esk machines to do everyday tasks" and "Can't have a penguin who disguises as a chicken as an arch rival"…
    Proud owner of: 0.36 0.43 0.99 Internet(s), 2 Win(s), and 3000 Brownie Point(s)

    Quote Originally Posted by Welknair View Post
    *Proceeds to google "Bride of the Portable Hole", jokingly wondering if it might exist*

    *It does.*

    What.

  25. - Top - End - #865
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    Beowulf DW's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *Even if we didn't plan it out in advance, my oracle is forbidden from worshiping our party's tetori as a messianic figure due to backstory synergy.
    Avatar by The_Architect.

    Quote Originally Posted by Flickerdart View Post
    Fortunately, a Monk 1/Warblade 19 uses Iron Heart Surge to end the Monk character class, and the day is saved.

  26. - Top - End - #866
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    BlueKnightGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    * wiping out a small island miles away is not an acceptable method of intimidating someone
    ** Especially not if the person I'm tyring to intimidate asks me to prove I did so
    *** Especially, especially not to repeate procedure centered on myself to prove I did so...
    **** I am not allowed near casters and/or intimidate
    love of mine, someday you will die,
    and I'll be close behind
    to follow you into the dark


    death cab for cutie - I will follow you into the dark

    Bleach D20 classes project - come, we wants all your brians!
    BleachD20 source book

  27. - Top - End - #867
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    newBlazingAngel's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *I am to stop pulling out the star wars roleplaying game in hopes that I can slip something in to a game of d20 modern.
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    No I did not make my own banner, it was created by a very talented person who I've lost contact with.

    I just started playing D&D, and love the game

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    First level paladin.
    STR:14
    DEX: 8
    CON: 10
    INT:13
    WIS: 12
    CHA: 16

  28. - Top - End - #868
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by planswalker View Post
    * I may not use calculus as a metaphor for anything in DnD. Even if I use it properly, the odds that the person I am talking to will pick up on it, understand it, and properly be able to use it themselves is too slim.
    ** Quantum Field Theory is right out.
    Lord Raziere herd I like Blasphemy, so Urpriest Exalted as a Malefactor

    Meet My Monstrous Guide to Monsters. Everything you absolutely need to know about Monsters and never thought you needed to ask.
    Quote Originally Posted by Mithril Leaf View Post
    One of the unwritten rules of Giantitp is that Urpriest is always right.
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    original Urpriest (by Andraste)

  29. - Top - End - #869
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    planswalker's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Urpriest View Post
    ** Quantum Field Theory is right out.
    *** Know what, let's just go ahead and say that the hard sciences and fantasy roleplay are mutually antithetical to each other and be done with it.
    Best. Thread. Ever!

    Much thanks to Ceika for the Collin Brady Poketar!

  30. - Top - End - #870
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    RedWizardGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by BlackestOfMages View Post
    * wiping out a small island miles away is not an acceptable method of intimidating someone
    ** That's what wiping out populated cities is for.

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