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  1. - Top - End - #1051
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Hyena's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    I, in fact, did expect spanish inqusition. I am still strictly forbidden to mention it, however.
    I'm looking for a DM for a skype Star Wars Saga Edition game. If you are interested, please write me in skype (taumaturgist).

    Avatar by AddZabble

  2. - Top - End - #1052
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    SwashbucklerGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Beowulf DW View Post
    *No matter how many Nat 20s I roll, I cannot stab someone in the heart with a grand piano.
    * I may not attach an instrument blade to a grand piano.
    ** I may not attach an instrument blade to an upright piano either.
    *** Nor can I attach an instrument blade to an organ.
    **** The same applies to harmonicas, drums, handbells, harpsichords, cymbals, flutes, recorders…
    ***** You know what, I'm not allowed to have an instrument blade at all…
    Last edited by Ksheep; 2012-07-25 at 05:08 PM.
    Proud owner of: 0.36 0.43 0.99 Internet(s), 2 Win(s), and 3000 Brownie Point(s)

    Quote Originally Posted by Welknair View Post
    *Proceeds to google "Bride of the Portable Hole", jokingly wondering if it might exist*

    *It does.*

    What.

  3. - Top - End - #1053
    Orc in the Playground
     
    newBlazingAngel's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *My campaigns are not to be centered around a dumb deaf and blind child who is the best pinball player in the world.
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    No I did not make my own banner, it was created by a very talented person who I've lost contact with.

    I just started playing D&D, and love the game

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    First level paladin.
    STR:14
    DEX: 8
    CON: 10
    INT:13
    WIS: 12
    CHA: 16

  4. - Top - End - #1054
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    SwashbucklerGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by newBlazingAngel View Post
    *My campaigns are not to be centered around a dumb deaf and blind child who is the best pinball player in the world.
    ** May not use mage hand while playing pinball and claim to be the pinball wizard.
    Proud owner of: 0.36 0.43 0.99 Internet(s), 2 Win(s), and 3000 Brownie Point(s)

    Quote Originally Posted by Welknair View Post
    *Proceeds to google "Bride of the Portable Hole", jokingly wondering if it might exist*

    *It does.*

    What.

  5. - Top - End - #1055
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Planetar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    * Not allowed to steal the paladin's sword, cast Meld Into Stone and then leave the sword behind half-sticking out of the rock.
    ** Am particularly not allowed to start calling the paladin "Arthur" after this.

  6. - Top - End - #1056
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *May not put ranks in perform (otamatone)
    **Especially if I own an actual one.
    Avatar courtesy of Dashwood

  7. - Top - End - #1057
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Rockphed's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Saintheart View Post
    * Not allowed to steal the paladin's sword, cast Meld Into Stone and then leave the sword behind half-sticking out of the rock.
    ** Am particularly not allowed to start calling the paladin "Arthur" after this.
    *** If he manages to pull it out on the first try, I am to swear fealty to him as the rightful king. And make sure his glorious and righteous rule is spread throughout the land.
    **** If the ogre we were fighting yanks the sword out still attached to the surrounding rock, I am not allowed to swear fealty to the ogre.
    ***** Even if said ogre would be a better king than the Paladin.
    Dragontar by Serpentine.

    Now offering unsolicited advice.

  8. - Top - End - #1058
    Orc in the Playground
     
    newBlazingAngel's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Saintheart View Post
    * Not allowed to steal the paladin's sword, cast Meld Into Stone and then leave the sword behind half-sticking out of the rock.
    ** Am particularly not allowed to start calling the paladin "Arthur" after this.
    ***Or Link
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    No I did not make my own banner, it was created by a very talented person who I've lost contact with.

    I just started playing D&D, and love the game

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    First level paladin.
    STR:14
    DEX: 8
    CON: 10
    INT:13
    WIS: 12
    CHA: 16

  9. - Top - End - #1059
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    Esprit15's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *If the DM makes it clear that stealing one of the PC's dog was just the result of a lost fight, we are not to derail the campaign to track down his captors. Get him a new dog and shut up about it.

    **May not raze a forest to find captors.

    ***May not finance the construction of a highway over the charred remains of said forest to cut down travel time again and make travel between towns safer.
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    Sophia Bertram, the Know-It-All
    Bryan Hume, the Philosopher

  10. - Top - End - #1060
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Manly Man's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Making a character whose race is "Munchkin" is no excuse.
    Last edited by Manly Man; 2012-07-26 at 04:11 AM.

  11. - Top - End - #1061
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Man on Fire's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    As DM

    * Cannot make God of Love be known in celestian pantheon as "Sexy Boy"
    ** His apperance cannot be accompained by Devas singing this song
    ** He cannot be best friends with God of War
    *** God of War cannot be woshipped as King of Kings
    **** Or Cerebral Asassin
    ***** Band of demons suspiciously similiar to Motorhead cannot start singing whenever he appears
    *** Those two cannot hang out together and fool around the mortal world
    **** If players are not down with it, they doesn't have two words for them.

  12. - Top - End - #1062
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Planetar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    * Burning down the entire forest to smoke out the BBEG is not a legitimate tactic.
    ** No, not even if certain other Neutral Good characters have done it.
    *** No, not even if I declare my character just wants to watch the world burn.
    **** I do not get to pick up rubies the size of tangerines after the event.

    * I do not gain Inspire Awe by putting ranks into Perform (Vogon Poetry).
    * Summon Instrument is not to be used to see if the party mage can in fact hit the side of a barn with a bull bass fiddle.

    * "HASSAN CHOP!" is not an appropriate battlecry.
    ** Not even if I bought an oversized falchion for that purpose.

  13. - Top - End - #1063
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    SwashbucklerGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    As a DM:
    *I may no longer create a giant gingerbread castle as the next dungeon for the party
    **I may no longer stock said dungeon with Warforged refluffed as gingerbread men.
    ***The dungeon may not be filled with perversions of sugary cereal mascots as its major encounters, no matter how badass I can make Tony the Weretiger, Count Chocula, Snap, Crackle, and Pop, or "The Cookie Crisp Heirarchy."
    ****While travelling through the sewer system of the castle, a large red water elemental encased in glass construct armor cannot burst through the wall yelling "OH YEAH!!!" and bodyslamming the warmage into a wall.
    *****If the party almost dies to a BBEG named "The Confectioneer" they have a right to pelt me with candy of their choice.

  14. - Top - End - #1064
    Barbarian in the Playground
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *The ability to create stable time loops is a privilege, not a right.

    *If I use the time-looping ability so much that time-clones of me and my party become a non-negligible demographic of their own within society, I deserve what I get.
    **Especially when the party is a Neutral Evil housecat obsessed with fire, a Killoren Druid Fluttershy, a constantly drunk draconic gnome rogue, and a halfling cleric with a pet hellhound.

    *Oddly enough, I /am/ allowed to use the time loops to abuse the heck out of the stock market.
    **However, I am /not/ allowed to use the massive amount of accumulated wealth until the final loop.

    *The timeclones aren't allowed to tell me what I'm supposed to be doing. Unless they're supposed to, in which case they will whether they're allowed or not.

    *I may only explode my fellow players' brains once per session.
    **If I start doing crazy things with the time travel, it is within my fellow players' rights to ask that I chart the timeflow out.
    *** If the chart ends up looking like something out of a topographical mathematician's LSD trip, that plan is to be discarded.
    ****If the plan gives the party any sort of mechanical, time-based advantage in a battle other than the ability to come back and try again if we're about to lose, it is also to be discarded.

    *The time-loop spell is not to be given to anyone with 'Chaotic' in their alignment, on general principle.
    **The time-loop spell is not to be given to anyone with an Intelligence score below 18, also on general principle.
    ***There is a minimum Intelligence threshold for creating plans that span multiple loops. If there is only one party member who is over that threshold, then that is how things are.

    *We are to assume that the timeline we are on is the Alpha timeline, and not do contrary things on the off chance it isn't.

  15. - Top - End - #1065
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Flame of Anor's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Ksheep View Post
    **** The same applies to harmonicas, drums, handbells, harpsichords, cymbals, flutes, recorders…
    You know, it would actually make sense on a flute.
    R.I.P.

    Quote Originally Posted by WampaX View Post
    It ain't not over 'til the Rich Baker bellows.
    avatar by me. Extended sig here.

  16. - Top - End - #1066
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    SwashbucklerGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Flame of Anor View Post
    You know, it would actually make sense on a flute.
    Where would you attach it? Plug up the barrel with it, or just slap it on the side? Either way, it would make it more difficult to play, if not impossible…
    Proud owner of: 0.36 0.43 0.99 Internet(s), 2 Win(s), and 3000 Brownie Point(s)

    Quote Originally Posted by Welknair View Post
    *Proceeds to google "Bride of the Portable Hole", jokingly wondering if it might exist*

    *It does.*

    What.

  17. - Top - End - #1067
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Man on Fire's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by ACSherman View Post
    As a DM:
    *I may no longer create a giant gingerbread castle as the next dungeon for the party
    **I may no longer stock said dungeon with Warforged refluffed as gingerbread men.
    ***The dungeon may not be filled with perversions of sugary cereal mascots as its major encounters, no matter how badass I can make Tony the Weretiger, Count Chocula, Snap, Crackle, and Pop, or "The Cookie Crisp Heirarchy."
    ****While travelling through the sewer system of the castle, a large red water elemental encased in glass construct armor cannot burst through the wall yelling "OH YEAH!!!" and bodyslamming the warmage into a wall.
    *****If the party almost dies to a BBEG named "The Confectioneer" they have a right to pelt me with candy of their choice.
    * No longer allowed to take inspiration from "Breakfeast of The Gods"

    Quote Originally Posted by byaku rai View Post
    *The ability to create stable time loops is a privilege, not a right.

    *If I use the time-looping ability so much that time-clones of me and my party become a non-negligible demographic of their own within society, I deserve what I get.
    **Especially when the party is a Neutral Evil housecat obsessed with fire, a Killoren Druid Fluttershy, a constantly drunk draconic gnome rogue, and a halfling cleric with a pet hellhound.

    *Oddly enough, I /am/ allowed to use the time loops to abuse the heck out of the stock market.
    **However, I am /not/ allowed to use the massive amount of accumulated wealth until the final loop.

    *The timeclones aren't allowed to tell me what I'm supposed to be doing. Unless they're supposed to, in which case they will whether they're allowed or not.

    *I may only explode my fellow players' brains once per session.
    **If I start doing crazy things with the time travel, it is within my fellow players' rights to ask that I chart the timeflow out.
    *** If the chart ends up looking like something out of a topographical mathematician's LSD trip, that plan is to be discarded.
    ****If the plan gives the party any sort of mechanical, time-based advantage in a battle other than the ability to come back and try again if we're about to lose, it is also to be discarded.

    *The time-loop spell is not to be given to anyone with 'Chaotic' in their alignment, on general principle.
    **The time-loop spell is not to be given to anyone with an Intelligence score below 18, also on general principle.
    ***There is a minimum Intelligence threshold for creating plans that span multiple loops. If there is only one party member who is over that threshold, then that is how things are.

    *We are to assume that the timeline we are on is the Alpha timeline, and not do contrary things on the off chance it isn't.
    * My character's motivation cannot be finding a way to timeline he calls Steins;Gate
    * Cannot name my final time-loop plan "El Psy Congo"

  18. - Top - End - #1068
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Dimers's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    * Sigh. No, I may also NOT take ranks in Perform (vuvuzela).

  19. - Top - End - #1069
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    SwashbucklerGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Dimers View Post
    * Sigh. No, I may also NOT take ranks in Perform (vuvuzela).
    * I CAN have a weapon blade on a vuvuzela, provided it it attached on the mouthpiece and facing me at all times.
    ** If I get a vuvuzela, I MUST put a weapon blade on it as soon as possible.
    Proud owner of: 0.36 0.43 0.99 Internet(s), 2 Win(s), and 3000 Brownie Point(s)

    Quote Originally Posted by Welknair View Post
    *Proceeds to google "Bride of the Portable Hole", jokingly wondering if it might exist*

    *It does.*

    What.

  20. - Top - End - #1070
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Planetar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Ksheep View Post
    * I CAN have a weapon blade on a vuvuzela, provided it it attached on the mouthpiece and facing me at all times.
    ** If I get a vuvuzela, I MUST put a weapon blade on it as soon as possible.
    *** No, I may not take a bard cohort solely for the purpose of him having Perform (Vuvuzela).

  21. - Top - End - #1071
    Firbolg in the Playground
     
    Qwertystop's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Ksheep View Post
    Where would you attach it? Plug up the barrel with it, or just slap it on the side? Either way, it would make it more difficult to play, if not impossible…
    The end of a flute is flat and closed. Make that end sharp.
    Quote Originally Posted by jamieth View Post
    ...though Talla does her best to sound objective and impartial, it doesn't cover stuff like "ask a 9-year-old to tank for the party."
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  22. - Top - End - #1072
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    SwashbucklerGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Qwertystop View Post
    The end of a flute is flat and closed. Make that end sharp.
    One end is flat and closed, but that's the end right next to your mouth. The other end is open, and if it wasn't it wouldn't produce sound properly. Sure, you COULD put it on the closed end, but then you'd risk slitting your cheek every time you play…
    Proud owner of: 0.36 0.43 0.99 Internet(s), 2 Win(s), and 3000 Brownie Point(s)

    Quote Originally Posted by Welknair View Post
    *Proceeds to google "Bride of the Portable Hole", jokingly wondering if it might exist*

    *It does.*

    What.

  23. - Top - End - #1073
    Firbolg in the Playground
     
    Qwertystop's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Ksheep View Post
    One end is flat and closed, but that's the end right next to your mouth. The other end is open, and if it wasn't it wouldn't produce sound properly. Sure, you COULD put it on the closed end, but then you'd risk slitting your cheek every time you play…
    Oh...


    Take the open end and sharpen the rim? Like a cookie-cutter!
    Quote Originally Posted by jamieth View Post
    ...though Talla does her best to sound objective and impartial, it doesn't cover stuff like "ask a 9-year-old to tank for the party."
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  24. - Top - End - #1074
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    SwashbucklerGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Qwertystop View Post
    Oh...


    Take the open end and sharpen the rim? Like a cookie-cutter!
    Hmm… now that might work. Just be sure you remove any meet from the end before playing it again…
    Proud owner of: 0.36 0.43 0.99 Internet(s), 2 Win(s), and 3000 Brownie Point(s)

    Quote Originally Posted by Welknair View Post
    *Proceeds to google "Bride of the Portable Hole", jokingly wondering if it might exist*

    *It does.*

    What.

  25. - Top - End - #1075
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Flame of Anor's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Ksheep View Post
    One end is flat and closed, but that's the end right next to your mouth. The other end is open, and if it wasn't it wouldn't produce sound properly. Sure, you COULD put it on the closed end, but then you'd risk slitting your cheek every time you play…
    It's easy. Just put an unsharpened 1-foot rod coming out of the closed end, with a spear point on the end. Balance it right, and you've got a little shortspear.
    Last edited by Flame of Anor; 2012-07-26 at 09:36 PM.
    R.I.P.

    Quote Originally Posted by WampaX View Post
    It ain't not over 'til the Rich Baker bellows.
    avatar by me. Extended sig here.

  26. - Top - End - #1076
    Barbarian in the Playground
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    That's gonna alter the acoustics of the flute some, but if you're using it to stab people you probably don't care too much about that anyway... >.>

  27. - Top - End - #1077
    Orc in the Playground
     
    newBlazingAngel's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    If you're going to do that may as well modify it to have a wider hole for deeper notes that also perfectly cradles blow darts.
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    No I did not make my own banner, it was created by a very talented person who I've lost contact with.

    I just started playing D&D, and love the game

    Spoiler
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    First level paladin.
    STR:14
    DEX: 8
    CON: 10
    INT:13
    WIS: 12
    CHA: 16

  28. - Top - End - #1078
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    Doorhandle's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by byaku rai View Post
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    *The ability to create stable time loops is a privilege, not a right.

    *If I use the time-looping ability so much that time-clones of me and my party become a non-negligible demographic of their own within society, I deserve what I get.
    **Especially when the party is a Neutral Evil housecat obsessed with fire, a Killoren Druid Fluttershy, a constantly drunk draconic gnome rogue, and a halfling cleric with a pet hellhound.

    *Oddly enough, I /am/ allowed to use the time loops to abuse the heck out of the stock market.
    **However, I am /not/ allowed to use the massive amount of accumulated wealth until the final loop.

    *The timeclones aren't allowed to tell me what I'm supposed to be doing. Unless they're supposed to, in which case they will whether they're allowed or not.

    *I may only explode my fellow players' brains once per session.
    **If I start doing crazy things with the time travel, it is within my fellow players' rights to ask that I chart the timeflow out.
    *** If the chart ends up looking like something out of a topographical mathematician's LSD trip, that plan is to be discarded.
    ****If the plan gives the party any sort of mechanical, time-based advantage in a battle other than the ability to come back and try again if we're about to lose, it is also to be discarded.

    *The time-loop spell is not to be given to anyone with 'Chaotic' in their alignment, on general principle.
    **The time-loop spell is not to be given to anyone with an Intelligence score below 18, also on general principle.
    ***There is a minimum Intelligence threshold for creating plans that span multiple loops. If there is only one party member who is over that threshold, then that is how things are.

    *We are to assume that the timeline we are on is the Alpha timeline, and not do contrary things on the off chance it isn't.
    Details about your campaign. Please.

    As a DM:
    Spoiler
    Show
    *I may no longer create a giant gingerbread castle as the next dungeon for the party
    **I may no longer stock said dungeon with Warforged refluffed as gingerbread men.
    ***The dungeon may not be filled with perversions of sugary cereal mascots as its major encounters, no matter how badass I can make Tony the Weretiger, Count Chocula, Snap, Crackle, and Pop, or "The Cookie Crisp Heirarchy."
    ****While travelling through the sewer system of the castle, a large red water elemental encased in glass construct armor cannot burst through the wall yelling "OH YEAH!!!" and bodyslamming the warmage into a wall.
    *****If the party almost dies to a BBEG named "The Confectioneer" they have a right to pelt me with candy of their choice.
    Y'know, I have ALLWAYS wanted to send a group of players to the elemental plane of candy. I mean, there's enough precedent for it in video-games....

    **May not raze a forest to find captors.

    ***May not finance the construction of a highway over the charred remains of said forest to cut down travel time again and make travel between towns safer.
    the idea of razing the forest to find their foes? Common P.C tactic.
    Building a highway on it so they can get to their foes faster? Ingenious.

    **** If the ogre we were fighting yanks the sword out still attached to the surrounding rock, I am not allowed to swear fealty to the ogre.
    ....*PLOTLINE FUEL.*
    Last edited by Doorhandle; 2012-07-27 at 02:36 AM.
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  29. - Top - End - #1079
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Doorhandle View Post
    the idea of razing the forest to find their foes? Common P.C tactic.
    Building a highway on it so they can get to their foes faster? Ingenious.
    Not to find them faster; to make the slow three day journey between towns only one day. And to avoid swarm encounters.
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