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  1. - Top - End - #1111
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    MindFlayer

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *You may not save your entire party from falling to death by casting Quickened Create Water 26 times.

    *You may not use a rogue with a crossbow loaded with Bolts of Cure Serious Wound as a rough substitute for the cleric who drown.
    "Two elves walked into a bar. There's now a Bar Elf sub-race." -The Dungeon Master on Facebook: http://tinyurl.com/cczy9vg

    You'd probably be best to take everything I say with a grain of salt. Unless we're arguing about alignment. In which case, you're wrong.

  2. - Top - End - #1112
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    RedWizardGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by BootStrapTommy View Post
    *You may not save your entire party from falling to death by casting Quickened Create Water 26 times.

    *You may not use a rogue with a crossbow loaded with Bolts of Cure Serious Wound as a rough substitute for the cleric who drown.
    **A healing shiv is also not allowed.

    ***Bolts of cure serious wounds can, however, be used against undead.
    Last edited by Randomguy; 2012-08-03 at 08:48 PM.

  3. - Top - End - #1113
    Titan in the Playground
     
    TuggyNE's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Doorhandle View Post
    **May not Use a few helms of change alignment to make an entirely new group of palladins out of planar-bound Succubi or Lillitu ethier.
    Whyever not?
    Quote Originally Posted by Water_Bear View Post
    That's RAW for you; 100% Rules-Legal, 110% silly.
    Quote Originally Posted by hamishspence View Post
    "Common sense" and "RAW" are not exactly on speaking terms
    Projects: Homebrew, Gentlemen's Agreement, DMPCs, Forbidden Knowledge safety, and Top Ten Worst. Also, Quotes and RACSD are good.

    Anyone knows blue is for sarcas'ing in · "Take 10 SAN damage from Dark Orchid" · Use of gray may indicate nitpicking · Green is sincerity

  4. - Top - End - #1114
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    Esprit15's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    PTTA
    *Our Engineer may not make combustable lemons. Engineers make vehicles.
    **No, the Artificer may not make combustable lemons. Lemons are not a weapon.
    ***A Botanist cannot breed combustable lemons.
    ****No combination of classes results in combustable lemons.
    **We may not burn down houses with combustable lemons.
    **We may not get mad at life.
    **Life does not have a manager.
    **No more Portal references.
    Avatar by Ceika

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    Sophia Bertram, the Know-It-All

  5. - Top - End - #1115
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Riverdance's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *My Wu Jen's lips may not continue moving after he is done speaking.

    (Idea Credit to Mr. Welch, #9)

    *Severe brain trauma does not result in my bodyguard permanently talking like Sean Connery after he wakes up.
    Last edited by Riverdance; 2012-08-05 at 08:22 PM.
    Many thanks to Ceika for my Avatar

  6. - Top - End - #1116
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Doorhandle's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by BootStrapTommy View Post
    *You may not save your entire party from falling to death by casting Quickened Create Water 26 times.

    *You may not use a rogue with a crossbow loaded with Bolts of Cure Serious Wound as a rough substitute for the cleric who drown.
    *Not to point out that falling on water from a great height is as bad as hitting concrete if the G.M is trying to save our puny asses.
    Have a deviantart!
    Can't write. Can't plan. Can draw a little.
    Quote Originally Posted by Craft (Cheese) View Post
    "In his free time, he gates in Balors just so he can kill and eat them later!"

  7. - Top - End - #1117
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Techwarrior's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Why did you have Quickened Create Water prepared? 26 times?

  8. - Top - End - #1118
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    Sith_Happens's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    * If my Exalt is secretly designed for the express purpose of recreating the finale to F-Zero: Falcon Densetsu, then he must likewise sacrifice himself in the process of performing his Falcon Punch.
    ** I am not to be upset when the Big Bad uses a perfect defense.

    * It doesn't matter that the Far Realm is a place of utter madness and illogic, the FATALverse is not one of its layers and I am not to trick my players into going there.
    ** No, not even if the whole point is to eventually bait the wizard into casting a spell so that it can "accidentally" turn into the FATAL spell and destroy the whole "layer."
    *** After putting them through this experience, the least I can do is tell the party that they are now immune to the Far Realm proper's insanity-causing mechanic (because it suddenly seems quite sane by comparison), and that the paladin will forever be in the utmost favor of his/her god due to his/her part in this immense act of Good (i.e.- destroying the FATALverse).
    **** If the paladin, or any other PC for that matter, is in fact a she, then that does not even come close to making up for it.
    ** I am never allowed to GM, except in my sick, twisted imagination.
    Last edited by Sith_Happens; 2012-08-06 at 07:53 AM.
    Revan avatar by kaptainkrutch.
    Quote Originally Posted by Cirrylius View Post
    That's how wizards beta test their new animals. If it survives Australia, it's a go. Which in hindsight explains a LOT about Australia.

  9. - Top - End - #1119
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    RedWizardGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Techwarrior View Post
    Why did you have Quickened Create Water prepared? 26 times?
    How else are you supposed to kill a Dry Lich?


    *May not use Disintigrate to clean up garbage. That's what Prestigidation is for.

    *If the BBEG's evil plan is to destroy the earth, destroying it before he can, and in a different way, is not victory.

    *May not put one ring gate into the elemental plane of water and the other into the elemental plane of air (suspended in a strong updraft) just to make bubbles.
    **Not to use those bubbles to sink ships.

    EDIT:
    *Not to polymorph the bard into a gibbering mouther so he can sing barbershop quartet by himself.
    **Not even if the preformance is in the far realms.
    ***Not to make a band with a gibbering mouther as the singer, an aboleth on bass and a grell playing drums.
    ****all Bard Party + aberration PC's don't mix.
    Last edited by Randomguy; 2012-08-06 at 07:26 PM.

  10. - Top - End - #1120
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Planetar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Riverdance View Post
    *My Wu Jen's lips may not continue moving after he is done speaking.
    * Not allowed to cast Ghost Sound on the initiative count after the Unarmed Swordsage has hit with an unarmed attack.
    * Perform (Weapon Drill) does not actually give me +10 to BAB when using nunchaku.
    * My samurai is not played by Sonny Chiba and is not named Hattori Hanzo.
    * "Wingrish" is not a valid language selection.

  11. - Top - End - #1121
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Man on Fire's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    * Cannot research a spell allowing me to recreate finale of Gurren Lagann.
    ** Cannot research greater version of that spell to recreate finale of the movie
    *** Cannot research spell to recrate finale of that finale either.

  12. - Top - End - #1122
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    BlueKnightGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *cannot destroy all of reality on a whim
    *Cannot have the ultimate goal of intrumentality
    *Cannot declare the total lack of identity to be utoipia
    *my character cannot be so neutoritc and broken he would be unable to function in the real world
    * or an emotionless clone thats part eldritch abomination
    *Not even in cthulutech
    Especially in cthulutech
    Not allowed to instroduce a self-proclaimed mecha fan to Evangellion through his love of cthulutech jut to watch his poor mind warp so I can cackle maniacally... then steal his chips.
    love of mine, someday you will die,
    and I'll be close behind
    to follow you into the dark


    death cab for cutie - I will follow you into the dark

    Bleach D20 classes project - come, we wants all your brians!
    BleachD20 source book

  13. - Top - End - #1123
    Halfling in the Playground
     
    DruidGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Blackest that is mean; Evangelion is bad enough but you had to steal his chips on top of shredding is hopes and dreams. Take this: http://www.icitta.co.uk/wp-content/u.../06/cookie.gif


    *May not make a tibbit wizard bent on world domination
    **double so if he is named Salem Saberhagen (a cookie to anyone that gets this)


    also anyone know how to embed a link in text?
    Last edited by saxavarius; 2012-08-07 at 10:55 PM.

  14. - Top - End - #1124
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    SwashbucklerGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by saxavarius View Post
    also anyone know how to embed a link in text?
    Yes. Type [URL="www.websitenamehere.com"]Text you want to be hyperlinked… [/url (and then a close brace)
    Proud owner of: 0.36 0.43 0.99 Internet(s), 2 Win(s), and 3000 Brownie Point(s)

    Quote Originally Posted by Welknair View Post
    *Proceeds to google "Bride of the Portable Hole", jokingly wondering if it might exist*

    *It does.*

    What.

  15. - Top - End - #1125
    Orc in the Playground
     
    newBlazingAngel's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by saxavarius View Post
    *May not make a tibbit wizard bent on world domination
    **double so if he is named Salem Saberhagen (a cookie to anyone that gets this)
    Sabrina the Teenage witch, human turned into cat for attempting world domination.
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    No I did not make my own banner, it was created by a very talented person who I've lost contact with.

    I just started playing D&D, and love the game

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    First level paladin.
    STR:14
    DEX: 8
    CON: 10
    INT:13
    WIS: 12
    CHA: 16

  16. - Top - End - #1126
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Flumph

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *Just because you can create a couple hundred little shadow sprite minions does not mean you should cover the area around your house with them.

    **No really stop, you're scaring the townsfolk and that's bad for business.

    ***I will not teach my less responsible colleagues the powers of The Sigil of the Brass Dawn, just because they ask me to.

    ****I am not allowed to teach people magic.

  17. - Top - End - #1127
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    enderlord99's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Geigan View Post
    ***I will not teach my less responsible colleagues the powers of The Sigil of the Brass Dawn, just because they ask me to.
    ****There is no such thing as a Far Realm of the Tungsten Dusk.

    *****I may no longer assume we are playing Planescape.
    A sufficiently poorly-written vampire will, when exposed to the sun's rays, turn into a purple unicorn.
    Spoiler: Previous avatars
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  18. - Top - End - #1128
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Kira_the_5th's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    * Turning the party's world into a musical is a trick I can get away with exactly once.
    I work with the staff of Roleplaying is Magic now for the Season 3 Edition! Check them out! Link!

    My first full RPG is up for funding on Kickstarter! Check it out! https://www.kickstarter.com/projects...-the-night-rpg

    Avatar by Doran Liadon

  19. - Top - End - #1129
    Halfling in the Playground
     
    DruidGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Here you go Angle one cookie as promised

    *I may not seduce the owner of the tavern for a cheaper price on room and board
    **even especially if I am playing a succubus
    *If playing a succubus I may not use charm person and diplomancy to gain worshipers and ascend before 20th level
    Last edited by saxavarius; 2012-08-08 at 07:59 PM.

  20. - Top - End - #1130
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Riverdance's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Kira_the_5th View Post
    * Turning the party's world into a musical is a trick I can get away with exactly once.
    *The Paladin's name is not Truly Scrumptious
    **Even if it is, my bard may not convince orphan waifs to follow her, pleading her to be their mother in musical verse.
    ***I may not play any class with musical ability or access to enchantment features.
    Many thanks to Ceika for my Avatar

  21. - Top - End - #1131
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Arbane's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by saxavarius View Post
    *If playing a succubus I may not use charm person and diplomancy to gain worshipers and ascend before 20th level

    How about AT 20th level?
    Imagine if all real-world conversations were like internet D&D conversations...
    Protip: DnD is an incredibly social game played by some of the most socially inept people on the planet - Lev

  22. - Top - End - #1132
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Doorhandle's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Geigan View Post
    *Just because you can create a couple hundred little shadow sprite minions does not mean you should cover the area around your house with them.

    **No really stop, you're scaring the townsfolk and that's bad for business.

    ***I will not teach my less responsible colleagues the powers of The Sigil of the Brass Dawn, just because they ask me to.

    ****I am not allowed to teach people magic.
    A legend campagin? Sign me up!

    *Not to use bull-rush and a Mighty Devsistaing weapon in order to launch my allies great distances.
    Have a deviantart!
    Can't write. Can't plan. Can draw a little.
    Quote Originally Posted by Craft (Cheese) View Post
    "In his free time, he gates in Balors just so he can kill and eat them later!"

  23. - Top - End - #1133
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Hyena's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *When I'm asked to play non-codzilla cleric, may not start with wisdom score of 20 and ready only cure minor wounds.
    Last edited by Hyena; 2012-08-09 at 04:53 AM.
    I'm looking for a DM for a skype Star Wars Saga Edition game. If you are interested, please write me in skype (taumaturgist).

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  24. - Top - End - #1134
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    Mindartis's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *Wearing a shirt with the name of a company while robbing another company is not a good idea.
    **It will lead to war between the two companies
    ***They will probably still figure out who you are anyways.
    (Shadowrun)
    "People assume that time is a strict progression of cause to effect, but *actually* from a non-linear, non-subjective viewpoint - it's more like a big ball of wibbly wobbly... time-y wimey... stuff."

    Marcus Fenix avatar by Me!

  25. - Top - End - #1135
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    Lord_Gareth's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *Cults are a privilege, not a right.


    Quote Originally Posted by Chilingsworth View Post
    Wow! Not only was that awesome, I think I actually kinda understand Archeron now. If all the "intermediate" outer planes got that kind of treatment, I doubt there would be anywhere near as many critics of their utility.
    My extended homebrew sig

  26. - Top - End - #1136
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Blisstake's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    When the bard does a very special dance for me, I'm not allowed to say "I have the weirdest bonus right now."
    Avatar by A Rainy Knight

  27. - Top - End - #1137
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Dead_Jester's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Mindartis View Post
    *Wearing a shirt with the name of a company while robbing another company is not a good idea.
    **It will lead to war between the two companies
    ***They will probably still figure out who you are anyways.
    ****I should not then proceed to claim to have been working for another company to muddy the issue further.
    *****Evidence indicating that we are, in fact, completely innocent will probably not be considered, especially if it "magically" appears after our incarceration and the previous evidence still exists
    ******Making a deal with a dragon to get out, only to betray him and his company afterwards, is the definition of insanity, and will lead to a major reduction of life expectancy

    Yes, my Shadowrun players forgot the first rule...
    The Age of Warrior, a ToB expansion.

    Credits to Ninjaman for old Death Jester avatar.
    Homebrew (feel free to PEACH)
    Base Classes:
    Fighter Fix, The Sublime Matador

    Disciplines:
    The Endless Play

  28. - Top - End - #1138
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    Lord_Gareth's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Dead_Jester View Post
    Yes, my Shadowrun players forgot the first rule...
    "Always make three characters, because you'll probably manage to kill all three of them."?


    Quote Originally Posted by Chilingsworth View Post
    Wow! Not only was that awesome, I think I actually kinda understand Archeron now. If all the "intermediate" outer planes got that kind of treatment, I doubt there would be anywhere near as many critics of their utility.
    My extended homebrew sig

  29. - Top - End - #1139
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Riverdance's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Blisstake View Post
    When the bard does a very special dance for me, I'm not allowed to say "I have the weirdest bonus right now."
    That made me laugh inside.

    **I may not use "bonus" as a euphemism. Ever.
    Many thanks to Ceika for my Avatar

  30. - Top - End - #1140
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    SwashbucklerGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *** Perform (belly dance) is not allowed for my bard.
    **** The same goes for Perform (pole dance)
    ***** You know what, I'm not allowed to play a bard anymore.
    Proud owner of: 0.36 0.43 0.99 Internet(s), 2 Win(s), and 3000 Brownie Point(s)

    Quote Originally Posted by Welknair View Post
    *Proceeds to google "Bride of the Portable Hole", jokingly wondering if it might exist*

    *It does.*

    What.

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