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  1. - Top - End - #1171
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    MindFlayer

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Doorhandle View Post
    *Not to point out that falling on water from a great height is as bad as hitting concrete if the G.M is trying to save our puny asses.
    If you're summoning water, you're summoning it near you. Thus, being submerged within a giant mass of water would theoretically slow down the duration of the impact when you hit, especially if the volume of water is significant compared to the size of the cavern you find yourself in.

    Quote Originally Posted by Techwarrior View Post
    Why did you have Quickened Create Water prepared? 26 times?
    Not an optimal way to built a character, but fun. A Water cleric who was a wall of meat and health, healed with spontaneous conversion, and for flavor he created water, made water holy, and then controlled said water.

    When you can flood a cavern with water almost instantaneously, you can let a lack of oxygen do most of your killing for you. Bless the water in case of undead.
    Quote Originally Posted by Kid Jake View Post
    Kill a PC's father? Well that's just the cost of doing business.
    Steal a PC's boots? Now it's personal.
    Please take everything I say with a grain of salt. Unless we're arguing about alignment. In which case, you're wrong.

    Former EMPIRE2! Player: Imperator of the Nihoni Dominion
    Former EMPIRE3! Player: Suzerain of the Phœnīx Estates
    Former EMPIRE4! Player: Margrave of the Margraviate of Rhune
    My Awesome Campaign Setting

  2. - Top - End - #1172
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    Edog's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *I may not attempt to purify the lower planes by Planar Binding demons and devils, wiping their alignments, converting them to the forces of Good, and then dismissing them.
    Thanks, Prime32, for the awesome Cirno avatar!

    Good English is vigorous and concise.

  3. - Top - End - #1173
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Sith_Happens's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    * Even if it doesn't sound out of place in the setting, my Exalt's name may not be Vash the Stampede.
    ** "Valentinez Alkalinella Xifax Sicidabohertz Gumbigobilla Blue Stradivari Talentrent Pierre Andres Charton-Haymoss Ivanovicci Baldeus George Doitzel Kaiser III" is out of the question.
    Revan avatar by kaptainkrutch.
    Quote Originally Posted by Cirrylius View Post
    That's how wizards beta test their new animals. If it survives Australia, it's a go. Which in hindsight explains a LOT about Australia.

  4. - Top - End - #1174
    Troll in the Playground
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Sith_Happens View Post
    ** "Valentinez Alkalinella Xifax Sicidabohertz Gumbigobilla Blue Stradivari Talentrent Pierre Andres Charton-Haymoss Ivanovicci Baldeus George Doitzel Kaiser III" is out of the question.
    *** Even if everyone calls her "Ed".
    Imagine if all real-world conversations were like internet D&D conversations...
    Protip: DnD is an incredibly social game played by some of the most socially inept people on the planet - Lev
    I read this somewhere and I stick to it: "I would rather play a bad system with my friends than a great system with nobody". - Trevlac
    Quote Originally Posted by Kelb_Panthera View Post
    That said, trolling is entirely counterproductive (yes, even when it's hilarious).

  5. - Top - End - #1175
    Banned
     
    Goblin

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    * No longer allowed obliberating entire plane by opening huge portals to Hel and Abyss and watch as Blood War devours everything.
    ** Even if I'm playing planar traveller who landed in Dark Sun.

  6. - Top - End - #1176
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    Flumph

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Fiasco:
    * I am not allowed to play any character in a position of authority
    * I am not allowed to play any character with money
    * I am not allowed to play any character who can manipulate others through fear
    * I am not allowed to play any role that causes one of the other players to state "Oh God, He's Back!"
    * I am not allowed a speaking role
    * I am not allowed a role where I can gesture
    * I am not allowed to play Fiasco
    * The name "Doctor Clark Devlin MD" is no longer to be spoken aloud
    * The name "Doctor Clark Devlin MD" is no longer to be written down
    To the guy responsible for Belkar, Haley and Vaarsuvius. Thank you for providing over 800 comedy gems.

    My Favourite Giant Posts
    Well, It Took 10 Years, But His Tolerance For Rules-Based Criticism Finally Snapped Like A Dry Breadstick
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    "What's the point in defending the defensible? Where's the challenge in that?" - Nick Naylor, Thank You for Smoking

    Spot the Toxic Comic Fans! Gotta Catch 'Em All!

  7. - Top - End - #1177
    Firbolg in the Playground
     
    Lord_Gareth's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *Imps are not nunchucks, no matter how many Malconvoker levels I might have.


    Quote Originally Posted by Chilingsworth View Post
    Wow! Not only was that awesome, I think I actually kinda understand Archeron now. If all the "intermediate" outer planes got that kind of treatment, I doubt there would be anywhere near as many critics of their utility.
    My extended homebrew sig

  8. - Top - End - #1178
    Firbolg in the Playground
     
    Rockphed's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Man on Fire View Post
    * No longer allowed obliberating entire plane by opening huge portals to Hel and Abyss and watch as Blood War devours everything.
    ** Even if I'm playing planar traveller who landed in Dark Sun.
    *** I am not to be surprised when dark sun halflings conquer the lower planes.
    **** The default cosmology does not have 3 foot tall, cannibalistic archfiends.
    Quote Originally Posted by Wardog View Post
    Rockphed said it well.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sam Starfall
    When your pants are full of crickets, you don't need mnemonics.
    Dragontar by Serpentine.

    Now offering unsolicited advice.

  9. - Top - End - #1179
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    HalflingRangerGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    When the party commits a contract killing a days travel from the queen who gave us the contract

    *I may not abandon my watch in order to cut the head off of the body we are transporting and take it for myself.

    **I may not, after stealing said head of our contract kill, abandon my party with an 8-hour head start to collect everyone's share of the bounty

    ***I may not lie to a queen, telling her my entire party has perished, when they are on their way to speak with said queen

    ****I may not hide everyone's share of the bounty and pretend to have only collect my portion.

    if I do, I should expect everyone in the party to hate me (except for the class Rogue, who will respect me for getting away with it)

  10. - Top - End - #1180
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Randomguy's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *The Continuum system is absolutely not to be used for a Homestuck campaign.

  11. - Top - End - #1181
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    DwarfFighterGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *Buzzing the Jade Pleasure Dome at Mach 3 will irritate the gods therein. (1st Ed Exalted)
    *A single magi-tech contraption pumping out more than 17 million damage per turn... Mystra's attention, you have it. (Playing an Arcane Mechanik PrCing into Warcaster in Faerun.)
    *I am no longer allowed to follow through with any idea that starts with my character yelling "Hey guys, watch this!"
    *No, my arcane mechanik cannot resurrect our dead party member.
    **Even if he slaughters an entire town of innocents in a single blaze to funnel their souls into said party member.
    *One should not be surprised when their character is regarded differently after slaying a group of apprentice red wizards with a rain of metal rods of... a dubious shape.
    *No, a Mercy focused hunter would not use a meat slicer on a screaming vampire's head. (Hunter: the Reckoning)
    **No, they... you know what? Your Martyr is now a Wayward.

  12. - Top - End - #1182
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Sith_Happens's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by MisterBananas View Post
    **Even if he slaughters an entire town of innocents in a single blaze to funnel their souls into said party member.
    *** The resurrected party member does not then function as a powerful magic amplifier.
    Revan avatar by kaptainkrutch.
    Quote Originally Posted by Cirrylius View Post
    That's how wizards beta test their new animals. If it survives Australia, it's a go. Which in hindsight explains a LOT about Australia.

  13. - Top - End - #1183
    Firbolg in the Playground
     
    Rockphed's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Sith_Happens View Post
    *** The resurrected party member does not then function as a powerful magic amplifier.
    **** Building a warforged does not involve attaching a human soul to a suit of armor.

    * I may not make villains based on the 7 heavenly virtues.
    Quote Originally Posted by Wardog View Post
    Rockphed said it well.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sam Starfall
    When your pants are full of crickets, you don't need mnemonics.
    Dragontar by Serpentine.

    Now offering unsolicited advice.

  14. - Top - End - #1184
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    SwashbucklerGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Rockphed View Post
    **** Building a warforged does not involve attaching a human soul to a suit of armor.

    * I may not make villains based on the 7 heavenly virtues.
    ** I may not make heroes based on the 7 deadly sins.
    Proud owner of: 0.36 0.43 0.99 2.00 Internet(s), 2 Win(s), and 3000 Brownie Point(s)

    Quote Originally Posted by Welknair View Post
    *Proceeds to google "Bride of the Portable Hole", jokingly wondering if it might exist*

    *It does.*

    What.

  15. - Top - End - #1185
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    Elemental's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *Duct tape will not allow the party members to mend the tear in reality caused by the party wizard accidentally destroying one of the crystals that holds the Universe together.
    Mauve Shirt, Savannah, Gnomish Wanderer, Cuthalion and Smuchmuch get cookies for making me avatars. (::)
    (::) Current avatar by Smuchmuch (::)

    Co Founder of LUTAS - For all your less than useful heroes out there.

    My Deviant Art. Careful, it's full of ponies.

    Dragons!

  16. - Top - End - #1186
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    RangerGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Elemental View Post
    *Duct tape will not allow the party members to mend the tear in reality caused by the party wizard accidentally destroying one of the crystals that holds the Universe together.
    It definitly will.


    *Duct tape does not replace a silence spell

    *Duct tape may not be used to screw with cat people

    *Wrapping the villan in duct tape to stop him from doing anything will work if we have enough duct tape
    **We don't have enough
    Warning!! This poster makes frequent use of Sarcasm, Jokes, and Exaggeration. He intends no offense.

  17. - Top - End - #1187
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Riverdance's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Elemental View Post
    *Duct tape will not allow the party members to mend the tear in reality caused by the party wizard accidentally destroying one of the crystals that holds the Universe together.
    **The way to turn lead to duct tape is not the great alchemical mystery of the present era.

    ***My character can not figure it out no matter how high his Alchemy Skill.
    Many thanks to Ceika for my Avatar

  18. - Top - End - #1188
    Ogre in the Playground
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Elemental View Post
    *Duct tape will not allow the party members to mend the tear in reality caused by the party wizard accidentally destroying one of the crystals that holds the Universe together.
    ** Regardless, I may not smoke the broken pieces of the crystal afterward.

  19. - Top - End - #1189
    Ogre in the Playground
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    * No domesticating elk.

  20. - Top - End - #1190
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    SolithKnightGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *I may not send Ensign Ricky to the surface of the planet to see if it's poisonous.
    **I may not send Ensign Ricky to see if the new species is peaceful or not.
    ***I may no longer command ensigns.
    Quote Originally Posted by Flickerdart View Post
    Fortunately, a Monk 1/Warblade 19 uses Iron Heart Surge to end the Monk character class, and the day is saved.

  21. - Top - End - #1191
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Antonok's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Beowulf DW View Post
    *I may not send Ensign Ricky to the surface of the planet to see if it's poisonous.
    **I may not send Ensign Ricky to see if the new species is peaceful or not.
    **** Doubly so if Ricky turns out to be the captains pet Mongoose.

    Kudos to who gets that reference.
    Chrono Crusade avi by Ceika.

    Remember: Cough, Rough, Through, Though don't rhyme, but for some forsaken reason Pony and Bolonga do...
    They say history repeats itself, so does our constant use of emojis mean we're reverting back to Egyptian hieroglyphs?
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  22. - Top - End - #1192
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    SwashbucklerGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Beowulf DW View Post
    *I may not send Ensign Ricky to the surface of the planet to see if it's poisonous.
    **I may not send Ensign Ricky to see if the new species is peaceful or not.
    ***I may no longer command ensigns.
    *****May not give all children born on ship the rank of Ensign as soon as they are old enough to walk.
    Proud owner of: 0.36 0.43 0.99 2.00 Internet(s), 2 Win(s), and 3000 Brownie Point(s)

    Quote Originally Posted by Welknair View Post
    *Proceeds to google "Bride of the Portable Hole", jokingly wondering if it might exist*

    *It does.*

    What.

  23. - Top - End - #1193
    Halfling in the Playground
     
    BardGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *If the DM realises that me and my friends characters are based on pinky and the brain and our only goal is to take over the realms they are vetoed.

    *It turns out romancing a princess while deposing her father is mutually exclusive, despite what history tells me.

    *If I stat up the slender man for a call of cthulhu campaign I shouldn't be surprised when he comes for me.

    **I will not stat up the slender man

    ***No. You. Will. Not.
    Resolute believer in letting my players attempt anything.

  24. - Top - End - #1194
    Dwarf in the Playground
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    I got my new DM to give me a house ruled spell that separates an area containing only 1 type of molecule and reduce in into the base elements
    (I used the example of splitting table salt into sodium and chlorine)

    when our 2nd level party was attacked by 20+ orcs who were crossing a fiver with a battering ram I convinced a party member to "stand by the river with a torch" saying i had a "good plan" (thank you massive bluff score). I promptly cast my spell on the river thus turning H2O into 2parts explosive gas and 1part flammable gas. the whole river blew like a bomb killing a grand total of 23 orcs 1PC and a fair amount of vegetation and wildlife, the GM finish by telling my deceased ally "your dead corpses levels up as it is swept away by the angry waters"

    Every DM who saw this has considered some or all of the following rules:
    I cannot use houseruled spells anymore
    I cannot play an alchemist anymore
    I cannot play a chaotic alignment anymore
    I cannot put ranks in charisma-based skills anymore
    Quote Originally Posted by Necroticplague View Post
    Remember kids: a good thief can steal everything that isn't nailed down, on fire, part of the building, or trying to kill them. Skilled adventurers have been known to leave behind far less that that.
    LGBTitP
    Avatar by Teutonic Knight.
    Universal Decay by Deamoneye Publishing
    Dungeons the Dragoning 40k 7.5th edition by Lawful Nice

  25. - Top - End - #1195
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Esprit15's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *Not to have access to Multitasking, Dual Wielding, Professor and Commander at the same time.
    Awesome avatar by Cuthalion

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    By Ceika, Ceika, Linklel (Except for one that appears to be lost to time)

  26. - Top - End - #1196
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    SwashbucklerGuy

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    * I may not throw a Roc at the party, only for it to grab one of the party members and fly away.
    ** I may not then throw a White Dragon with Snatch at the party, just to have it grab the same party member and fly away.
    *** May not use any monsters with the Snatch feat
    **** May NOT throw Tucker's Kobolds at the party either.
    ***** That's it, no more hit and run tactics from monsters EVER
    Proud owner of: 0.36 0.43 0.99 2.00 Internet(s), 2 Win(s), and 3000 Brownie Point(s)

    Quote Originally Posted by Welknair View Post
    *Proceeds to google "Bride of the Portable Hole", jokingly wondering if it might exist*

    *It does.*

    What.

  27. - Top - End - #1197
    Firbolg in the Playground
     
    Rockphed's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by Ksheep View Post
    * I may not throw a Roc at the party, only for it to grab one of the party members and fly away.
    ** I may not then throw a White Dragon with Snatch at the party, just to have it grab the same party member and fly away.
    *** May not use any monsters with the Snatch feat
    **** Not to be surprised when the player generates a new character who can pin anything.
    Quote Originally Posted by Wardog View Post
    Rockphed said it well.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sam Starfall
    When your pants are full of crickets, you don't need mnemonics.
    Dragontar by Serpentine.

    Now offering unsolicited advice.

  28. - Top - End - #1198
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Riverdance's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *To name a character Bilbo and have him be a nicotine addict is ok.
    **To name a character Bilbo and make him the world's best ruthless sniper is not.
    Many thanks to Ceika for my Avatar

  29. - Top - End - #1199
    Dwarf in the Playground
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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    *I may not play a charecter called "the doctor"
    **I may not have a blue telephone box that is bigger on the inside
    ***if I do it canot teleport in space and time
    ****when I die I may not create a character called the second(or third or fourth) doctor that is identical save slight cosmetic changes
    *****I may not have a sonic screwdriver
    ******ever
    Quote Originally Posted by Necroticplague View Post
    Remember kids: a good thief can steal everything that isn't nailed down, on fire, part of the building, or trying to kill them. Skilled adventurers have been known to leave behind far less that that.
    LGBTitP
    Avatar by Teutonic Knight.
    Universal Decay by Deamoneye Publishing
    Dungeons the Dragoning 40k 7.5th edition by Lawful Nice

  30. - Top - End - #1200
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Riverdance's Avatar

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    Default Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero

    Quote Originally Posted by the OOD View Post
    *I may not play a charecter called "the doctor"
    **I may not have a blue telephone box that is bigger on the inside
    ***if I do it canot teleport in space and time
    ****when I die I may not create a character called the second(or third or fourth) doctor that is identical save slight cosmetic changes
    *****I may not have a sonic screwdriver
    ******ever
    *******The paladin is an evil detector, not a timey-wimey detector.
    ********The paladin does not go ding when there's stuff.
    *********No the paladin does not even go ding when there's evil.
    Many thanks to Ceika for my Avatar

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