[Nexus] AMEN XLIII: REVOLUTION!

[iElf]

[Ilph's Office - Seltz]

"I see. So tell me a bit about this EDENcorp. That is your prior place of employment, yes?"

she nods "A biotech and arcanotech corp. it was fairly large a year ago, before it decided to attempt to take over Inside, and got stomped by what was the empire back then"

[Reinholdt]

[Ilphy's office -Anuki]

"Sadly, I have to inform you that all of those contracts are null and void. We have new forms that are completely bloodless. Copies can be found in the first post." Ilpholin explains.

[Ilph's Office - Seltz]

"I see. Were you a part of this takeover attempt that they made?"

[iElf]

[Ilph's Office - Seltz]

"I see. Were you a part of this takeover attempt that they made?"

she nods "I was responsible for breeding more combat clones, as well as developing the process of accelerated cloning I was evacuated before the Empire special ops blew the building up "

[Reinholdt]

[Ilph's Office - Seltz]

"The same ones you offered me, yes? Where did you go after EDENcorp exploded?"

[iElf]

[Ilph's Office - Seltz]

"The same ones you offered me, yes? Where did you go after EDENcorp exploded?"

"no. older inferior versions. you'd be getting a updated product. after EDENcorp, I went to another bio tech firm. Umbrella. although I never managed to complete a project there, before some virologist screwed up"

[Reinholdt]

[Ilph's Office - Seltz]

"Tell me a bit about Umbrella." Ilpholin says, steepling her fingers.

[Mindfreak]

Bunker

Stu's suit... bends with her! Whoo flexible option!
Probably results in her being thrown over him.

"Eh. They'll be back. The door was open, and your computer's broken. You people's fault not mine. Security here sucks. Either way, I'm leaving lady."

Bunker
She lands on her feet and draws her knife.
"Not if I kill you."

[iElf]

[Ilph's Office - Seltz]

"Tell me a bit about Umbrella." Ilpholin says, steepling her fingers.

"I wasn't there for long...most I can remember was cowering in the hive, looking for an escape route " Seltz sighs "I'm not the type to go on the front lines..."

[Reinholdt]

[Ilph's Office - Seltz]

"I gathered. So after Umbrella, why didn't you go to a third bio-tech company? Surely they would have better resources for your projects?"

Bunker

"Ugh. Really? That line again? Fine. FINE! I tried to play nice. Tried to go out of my way to be nice to you idiots with testosterone issues. Well SCREW YOU." And with that Stu performs a mega leap. It's not really that mega vertically wise, but it has a lot of kick behind it.

He intends to land on and smash their computer to itty bitty tiny bits.

[iElf]

[Ilph's Office - Seltz]

"I gathered. So after Umbrella, why didn't you go to a third bio-tech company? Surely they would have better resources for your projects?"

Seltz sighs "I'd tried some other large firms around here before I went to umbrella...the problem was my past work...many people had...ethical concerns with my work. and I can't hide the fact anymore, that my tech is based on human experimentation. the process was far from perfect their first few times"

[Reinholdt]

[Ilph's Office - Seltz]

"Fair enough. So what do you, personally, hope to achieve as the end result of all your projects?"

[Mindfreak]

Bunker

"Ugh. Really? That line again? Fine. FINE! I tried to play nice. Tried to go out of my way to be nice to you idiots with testosterone issues. Well SCREW YOU." And with that Stu performs a mega leap. It's not really that mega vertically wise, but it has a lot of kick behind it.

He intends to land on and smash their computer to itty bitty tiny bits.

Bunker
Stu will find that he has achieved his act of smashing the computer.
The girl removes her abestos helmet as the countdown goes straight to 0 as the alarm screeches through the complex.
"End of the world in 120 seconds!"
And then the blast door fall down again, and the whole complex begins shaking.
"..."
"You are an idiot, you know that?"

[Reinholdt]

Bunker

"Hey... wait, what? The voice earlier said we had two hours. Can't it make up it's mind?"

Stu is confused!

Also a total idiot, yes. But confused!

[Mindfreak]

Bunker
"Because the clock Los the computer's signal 'cause you broke it. They made these way back when, they didn't do things smartly."
"Which makes you an idiot."
"The only way we can both live now is if we can hook up this computer in time and put in the code." she explains as she runs about, getting one of the spare computers and beginning to hook it up.

[Reinholdt]

Bunker

"Ugh. Really? Living one's whole life hooked to a computer? That sounds like a miserable existence. I think I'd rather be dead." Course, death is merely an inconvenience for Stu.

[The Bushranger]

[Bunker]

...and meanwhile, there comes a knocking.

Rapping on the chamber door.

[Mindfreak]

Bunker
"Yeah, well, me and my comrades were the only thing keeping apparently a god from awakening and destroying the world, so I'd rather push a button every two hours then die."
And then the voice reaches one second and the whole bunker lurches.
"Looks like we're dead."

[Haruki-kun]

[Ilphy's office -Anuki]

"Sadly, I have to inform you that all of those contracts are null and void. We have new forms that are completely bloodless. Copies can be found in the first post." Ilpholin explains.

"Well, where's the fun in that? People always joked about the blood!" says Anyu, clearly displeased.

Haruki looks thoughtful. "Well, it wasn't very fun to begin with, I guess..."

"Quiet, bird boy!" says Anyu. "There's no longer any fun in these contracts!"

"True. Although she did break the fourth wall just now."

"Ugh.... FINE! Where are those contracts...?"

Haruki gets up and walks over to the fourth wall, walks through it, and returns later with two forms. He gives one to Anyu and keeps one to himself.

"'k, let's get to it, shall we?"

They both grab a pen from Ilpholin's desk, without really asking her. Talk about rude. Then they both sit and start filling out the forms.

Then there's a knock on the door. Yup.

[Reinholdt]

Bunker

Stu goes to grab the women and kiss her!
Also grope inappropriately.

It's the end of the world. Why not?

I doubt they can open the door for Becky, since the blast doors are down.

[Ilphy's office -Anuki]

"Try not to have so much fun. You might explode." Ilpholin says, with a little eyeroll, before going to open the door.

"In the middle of a double interview. What is it?"

[Haruki-kun]

[Ilpholin's office - Anukbrick]

"What do you mean 'what is it?'!" says Firebrick, walking in, form in hand. "What's this crap about me suddenly not being a member anymore? Hey, I was a henchman hear for years before I finally became a PC and an AMEN member, you people don't get to just kick me out into the street!"

"Though they certainly reserve the right to brutally murder you," says Ruki.

"Whatever. They can't do that anymore. Someone hand me a pen, I need to get working on this."

Anyu rolls her eyes. "Awww... didn't you bring your own pen to the exam? I would consider that unprepared, wouldn't you, professor Ilphy? I'd even give him a zero for that."

"Wait, there's an exam?" says Haruki with a start. "What's in it? I'm totally not prepared for it!"

"....be thankful you're pretty."

FireBrick doesn't bother closing the door, he just pulls up a chair and starts writing. Ilphy sure must have a lot of chairs in her office.

[Reinholdt]

[Ilpholin's office - Anukbrick]

Ilpholin sighs and shuts and locks the door. As it is, she's tempted to kick someone out and tell them to wait if they want any chance at staying in this organization. The interviews have a purpose!

"The exam is oral." Ilpholin says, leaning against the door.

[Haruki-kun]

[Ilpholin's office - Anukbrick]

"That's what sh- Meh. Never mind," says Firebrick.

Anyu lets out an exasperates sigh. "Be grateful you didn't finish that sentence, or I'd snap your neck." She points her pen at Firebrick like a sword.

"Ouch. You can get a little tough, can't you lady?"

"Let's just say this whip is not for use in kinky scenarios."

"With those clothes, I don't think any scene with you in it can be considered not kinky."

Haruki raises his hand. "Professor Ilphy, they're distracting me from my exam!"

"You tattle-tale!"

Suddenly, something outside hits the door. But it doesn't knock on it. It's just like something crashed with the door. It could be ignored...

[Reinholdt]

[Ilpholin's office - Anukbrick]

"Ok, one, whips are very useful tools, both inside and outside the bedroom. Two, so are clothes. Three, SHUT UP AND FILL OUT THE DAMN FORMS!"

Ilpholin wears a whip and a revealing skintight catsuit! Whose side did you think she was going to take?

She rubs her head at the noise outside the door, but refuses to open it until these three are done. They haven't even gotten through the easy part yet!

[Haruki-kun]

[Ilpholin's office - Anukbrick]

"You tell him, sister," mutters Anyu. "All done!" She turns her exam over and hands it to Ilpholin face-down, so as to keep the others from copying her.

Spoiler

Show

Name: Anyu
Age: 24
Sex: Female
Species: Human
Profession: Witch
Reason for joining AMEN: I'm evil, an awesome witch, an international spy, and pretty damn heartless.
Special skills/items you believe will aid/have decided to contribute to AMEN:
References (Victims preferred): OK, do you know a place n the southwest called "Dr. McMeanie's Island"? And have you ever heard of the man? No? That's because I blew it up with him on it. He had it coming.
Past Experience: See aforementioned blowing up.
Other Information: ISLAND! BLOWN UP!

There's another bang on the door. The three turn to look at it and exchange glances. "Done!" says Haruki, deciding to just ignore it. He hands it in the same way.

Spoiler

Show

Name: Haruki
Age: 537
Sex: Male
Species: Angel
Profession: Angel!
Reason for joining AMEN: I was already in it! Everyone loves having me around!
Special skills/items you believe will aid/have decided to contribute to AMEN: Uhm... I'm pretty damn strong, and a warrior, and can do healing magic of all sorts and have an awesome singing voice.
References (Victims preferred): My previous employers: Lord Magtok, Kat Sinister, Lord Walrus, President Chain Chomp, whoever was in charge of that Watchtower place for all of five minutes, and Gordon. Also, a couple gods and goddesses.
Past Experience: I've fought in wars with AMEN against France, and... a lot of other places?
Other Information: I still have my old room, right?

Another bang on the door. Firebrick turns his exam in. "Better grade it well, lady."

Spoiler

Show

Name: Bob FireBrick, AKA "#B22222"
Age: 26
Sex: Male
Species: Human
Profession: Rogue
Reason for joining AMEN: Well, I was kinda created as a character for a really long time by someone else, I was just named after an HTML color... and then I got into the registry and now I'm a PC. Being a PC is pretty awesome, you should try it.
Special skills/items you believe will aid/have decided to contribute to AMEN: I held my ground against Rot. That's pretty awesome, don't you think?
References (Victims preferred): Please refer to all the other Henchmen, they'll be happy to give reference. Also, Rot. he might still have a bruise or two.
Past Experience: Henchie?
Other Information: Nope. That's all.

And finally, another bang on the door. And a voice coming from the other side.

"Displace able structure appears to be stuck or jammed. Now processing. Searching for appropriate course of action. removing obstacle is suggested. Suggestion accepted."

[Reinholdt]

[Ilpholin's office - Anukbrick]

Ilpholin snatches up the forms.
"Those were just to get entry to the exam. Like I said, the exam is ora-DON'T BREAK MY DOOR!"
Ilpholin says, jumping to try and unlock it and fling it open in time.

[Mindfreak]

Bunker

Stu goes to grab the women and kiss her!
Also grope inappropriately.

It's the end of the world. Why not?

I doubt they can open the door for Becky, since the blast doors are down.

Bunker
They cannot indeed!

The woman struggles against Stu's efforts, but unfortunately was taken off guard and cannot stop it!

The bunker continues shaking wildly until...
It stops.
From the middle of the room a cylinder comes out, depositing a woman who looked to be about 20 clad in heavenly robes.
She seems to be out cold.

And then the blast doors raise and Becky will find that the door opens to her knockings.

[Haruki-kun]

[Ilpholin's office - Psanukbrick]

The door is opened. Psi is standing outside, charging an energy ball in her hands. She has a blank look on her face and eyes Ilphy curiously.

"Obstacle cleared. Destruction of obstacle no longer deemed necessary. Attack cancelled." The girl walks into Ilphy's office like she owns the place.

"Assessing. Scanning. Four humans detected. Now initiating Human Interacion Mode. Loading. Complete." She walks to where Anyu is sitting.

"Greetings. Are you Ilpholin?"

"No," mutters Anyu. "It's the other person with the whip."

Psi looks around the room. First at Haruki. Then at Firebrick. Then at Ilpholin. "Subject determined to be most likely to be in possession of a whip. Greetings. Are you Ilpholin?"

[Reinholdt]

[Ilpholin's office - Psanukbrick]

Ilpholin shuts the door again, locking it once more, but not before throwing a 'get lost' sign on the handle in the hallway.

"Seeing as how the whip is right there, yes, I am." Ilpholin points at the whip on her back.

"Are you an old AMEN member?"

Bunker

I'm sure Stu will stop anytime now...

[Haruki-kun]

[Ilpholin's office - Psanukbrick]

"Negative. Introduction suggested. Suggestion accepted. Foreign Interaction Device Ψ, Serial Number 23, Alias 'Psi' or 'Psi Twenty-Three'."

"Oh, fantastic. Crazy robot girl. We don't have any of those," says Firebrick.

"Really?" asks Anyu. "You'd think something as generic as that would show up at some point."

"...yeah. It just showed up."

"Unit is performing socio-political research update on 'Nexus'. In recent events, 'Association of the Malicious, Evil and Nefarious' has undergone a significant change in structure. In the interest of maintaining updated data, Unit has come to observe new procedures and interview new leadership."

The Angel looks sad. "I have no lines in this post..."

[Reinholdt]

[Ilpholin's office - Psanukbrick]

"Well the first procedure that's going to change is that I'm going to kill whoever let you into this base. I'm not in the habit of volunteering information for socio-psychotic robots. So, no comment."

There are so many logical fallacies in those three sentences, it might just fry Psi's brain.