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2012-09-08, 11:40 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Jan 2010
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2012-09-08, 11:48 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Aug 2010
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Re: Relationship Woes and Advice 22: In Which Two Problems Prevent Each Others' Solut
Yeah ... Well. I am just going to go on a rant now.
SpoilerSo, I have three main groups of close friends. I have my "child-hood" friends, my high school friends, and my European travel friends.
My child-hood friends are, by and large, not ****ed up. They're nice people and they have their flaws and such, but they're honest people and they'd never do anything really, truly wrong. For the most part.
My European travel buddies are ... a mixed group. By and large they have some pretty bad issues, but they're all good people. Lovely people. They're learning to cope with their problems and correct their mistakes.
My high school friends though? They are, in genera;, so ****ed up. One of them was an emotionless wall for the majority of his life and is now clinically depressed. One was kicked out of the army because he either A: Got into a huge fight, B: Failed his psychiatric exam, or C: Failed the physical because his liver's shot from all his drinking; all of these reasons have come from the same person, so to top it all off, he's a chronic liar.
And those are just two of them. I love them all to pieces, but being with them is tearing me apart inside.
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2012-09-09, 06:47 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Oct 2008
- Location
- Freljord
Re: Relationship Woes and Advice 22: In Which Two Problems Prevent Each Others' Solut
So yesterday I nearly ended up coming along with the girl I went out on a date with to a dinner party celebrating her grandma's 90th birthday. She seemed very excited about it at first (at least what I could deduct from her texts, as we talked via texts during work), but in the end backed down, telling me she'd rather not take me along. This was because her family would likely automatically assume me to be her boyfriend, and she asked me my opinion on that. I told her that while I like her for certain, the fact remains that we aren't in a relationship, so she shouldn't introduce me as her boyfriend. Ultimately though, I told her it was up to her what to do, since it's her family and all. She told me that she likes me a lot as well, but that she was too uncertain to take me along to her family, and that she wasn't at all brave. I told her that it was alright and we'd just take things at our own pace and I'd be seeing her next weekend on Sunday, as we'd just before decided to go to the biggest fantasy fair in Europe together.
To be honest, when she asked me what I thought of her family thinking of me being her boyfriend if I came along, on the one hand along the lines of "OH YOU SLY FOX" for asking me in such a manner - which hinted to me that she wanted to know how I felt about her first before confessing herself - and on the other hand "I AM SUBTLE LIKE BULLDOZER", thinking I had been rather obvious in it, as I tend to be rather obvious.
Right now, I'm just hoping I did it all right yesterday and things'll go smooth enough in the near (and far!) future.Homebrewer's Signature | Avatar by Strawberries
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2012-09-09, 09:11 AM (ISO 8601)
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- Mar 2011
- Gender
Re: Relationship Woes and Advice 22: In Which Two Problems Prevent Each Others' Solut
I think that when you know people well they stop hiding it as much.
Could also just be bad luck in some cases.
Sounds to me like that worked out fairly well, as long as both of you are comfortable at the same pace. Make sure of that by talking about it every so often. But from what both of you said it seems like you're both a big uncertain about being in a relationship just yet, so to me you look to be on the same page.Jude P.
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2012-09-10, 08:20 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Aug 2010
- Gender
Re: Relationship Woes and Advice 22: In Which Two Problems Prevent Each Others' Solut
So, I made this post back on page 36 about a week ago. People seemed to think that this was definitely something I should act upon. I haven't had a real chance to, and prior to yesterday, I though it didn't actually mean too much. But now I think it might. And now I don't know how to ask if she's interested. Help?
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2012-09-10, 08:22 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Mar 2011
- Gender
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2012-09-10, 08:25 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Aug 2010
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2012-09-10, 08:29 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Mar 2011
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2012-09-10, 08:37 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Oct 2008
- Location
- Xin-Shalast
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Re: Relationship Woes and Advice 22: In Which Two Problems Prevent Each Others' Solut
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2012-09-10, 09:59 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Nov 2007
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Re: Relationship Woes and Advice 22: In Which Two Problems Prevent Each Others' Solut
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2012-09-11, 02:31 AM (ISO 8601)
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- May 2007
- Gender
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2012-09-11, 04:15 AM (ISO 8601)
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- Oct 2008
- Location
- Freljord
Re: Relationship Woes and Advice 22: In Which Two Problems Prevent Each Others' Solut
Homebrewer's Signature | Avatar by Strawberries
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2012-09-11, 04:41 AM (ISO 8601)
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- Aug 2006
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- Leeds, UK
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Re: Relationship Woes and Advice 22: In Which Two Problems Prevent Each Others' Solut
"I'm just going on motive and opportunity here and the fact that if the earth got swallowed by a black hole, I'd look suspiciously in your direction first."
~ Timberwolf
"I blame Castaras. You know... In general."
~ KuReshtin
"Castaras - An absolutely adorable facade that hides a truly ruthless streak."
~ The Succubus
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2012-09-11, 04:50 AM (ISO 8601)
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- Sep 2008
- Location
- UK
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Re: Relationship Woes and Advice 22: In Which Two Problems Prevent Each Others' Solut
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2012-09-11, 05:15 AM (ISO 8601)
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- Sep 2012
- Location
- China
- Gender
Re: Relationship Woes and Advice 22: In Which Two Problems Prevent Each Others' Solut
Hey you sound like me 4 years ago...
At parties i never talked to other people, because i didn't want to interrupt others and when i was ready to talk, they moved on with the topic
I also think too much, everytime worried what the person might read into it, etc.
And yeah, the same with me that they said i m funny, blah blah blah...
The thing is, there is no one who can hold your hand and say "Come i help you"
1. If you can't talk to girls at a party, don't look for girls at a party. I had 4 girlfriends in my life (with my wife) and i never met any at a party. Library, supermarket, business, sports center, etc.
2. That's something i also never changed, but i guess that i can say that it's my heritage ( i m German)
3. If people WHO KNOW YOU say that, than it normally should be true, so you need to make the girl to see YOU and not the in the corner cowering, and running away from a cat person.
How to show it? Go to a place where you are comfortable, a place where you know what you are doing and offer help, sometimes it also helps to ask for help (depends on the girl) That are usually good starters for a conversation "Can i help you?"
But there is one advice i give to everyone: If you want to find the real deal, don't go and look for it, but keep your eyes open.
(I m happily married to the girl i met on a business trip and we have a beautiful baby girl)
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2012-09-11, 05:30 AM (ISO 8601)
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- May 2007
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Re: Relationship Woes and Advice 22: In Which Two Problems Prevent Each Others' Solut
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2012-09-11, 09:16 AM (ISO 8601)
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- Sep 2009
- Location
- NYC
Re: Relationship Woes and Advice 22: In Which Two Problems Prevent Each Others' Solut
Or you could combine the two:
"Milady, I recall that thou hast recently requested my presence at a viewing of the tale of the son of Arachne, where you wished to identify various shortcomings of the narrative. I accept thy offer. When the moon rises on the day of Freya, I will venture to your abode. In addition, I will bring a pizza of which we can partake whilst we conduct our examination."
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2012-09-11, 10:02 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Oct 2008
- Location
- Freljord
Re: Relationship Woes and Advice 22: In Which Two Problems Prevent Each Others' Solut
Homebrewer's Signature | Avatar by Strawberries
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2012-09-11, 10:19 AM (ISO 8601)
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- Sep 2009
- Location
- NYC
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2012-09-11, 12:32 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Aug 2010
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Re: Relationship Woes and Advice 22: In Which Two Problems Prevent Each Others' Solut
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2012-09-11, 01:47 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Jul 2007
- Location
- Greensboro, NC
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2012-09-11, 02:10 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Mar 2011
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2012-09-11, 02:36 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Jan 2010
Re: Relationship Woes and Advice 22: In Which Two Problems Prevent Each Others' Solut
Might I suggest something akin to
Spoiler
Last edited by Karen Lynn; 2012-09-11 at 03:09 PM.
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2012-09-11, 02:49 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Mar 2011
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2012-09-11, 05:43 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Oct 2008
- Location
- Freljord
Re: Relationship Woes and Advice 22: In Which Two Problems Prevent Each Others' Solut
Homebrewer's Signature | Avatar by Strawberries
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2012-09-11, 09:36 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Aug 2010
- Gender
Re: Relationship Woes and Advice 22: In Which Two Problems Prevent Each Others' Solut
She does. Thanks again for all the advice guys, though, I currently have some bigger issues I need to take care of.
SpoilerMe and my friends have another friend we're really worried about. They seem to be digging their grave right now, and it's awful. Me and some close friends are going to confront them in a bit but first we're going to get some advice from the school psychiatrist. Wish us like guys. We need it.
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2012-09-11, 09:52 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Oct 2008
- Location
- Xin-Shalast
- Gender
Re: Relationship Woes and Advice 22: In Which Two Problems Prevent Each Others' Solut
AtlanteanTroll
SpoilerDepending upon what exactly you mean by that, usually those people are mandatory reporters... Or whatever the term is properly... Which, if it's something serious is probably a good thing anyway.
I wish you all the best in this, and I hope your friend gets the help they need.
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2012-09-12, 04:10 AM (ISO 8601)
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- May 2007
- Gender
Re: Relationship Woes and Advice 22: In Which Two Problems Prevent Each Others' Solut
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2012-09-12, 06:01 AM (ISO 8601)
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- Mar 2011
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2012-09-12, 07:10 PM (ISO 8601)
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- Aug 2010
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