D&D Demotivators Episode VI: Return of the JPEG

[Scow2]

I find "Big Huge Labs Does Not Store Images" to be very funny, for two reasons:
1. There will STILL be broken images because people link to Big Huge Labs.
2. We actually NEED such a disclaimer because of the above.

[Notreallyhere77]

I would also like to support the title "Big Huge Labs Still Does Not Store Images."

Tax to be added tomorrow.

[SilverLeaf167]

I support the idea as well.
I wish I could pay tax, but... how am I supposed to pay you in demotivators if I don't have any?

[NM020110]

I keep seeing something mentioned about taxes. I'm not really sure what they're about though, so have a few demotivators instead.

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[Dr.Epic]

There are way more than one thousand books there.

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Vegeta, what does the scouter say about the number of books?

But serious, there has to be in the millions.

[NM020110]

You're right. One-thousand books just happened to be the number used in the Battle of Wits flavor text, which I had quoted for the first two lines.

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Let's assume an average of three inches for book thickness, shelves five feet across, ten shelves making up one case. I'd put the cases at 10-20 stories high as a conservative estimate. Call it 15. Five feet between the shelves (yes, this is arbitrary).

In the initial depiction, an aerial battle moving in one direction ran for five minutes. Let's go for a conservative estimate and say that movement was at twelve miles per hour, and assume a square shape for the library (space inside has been modified heavily so that the library will fit; shape is more or less arbitrary). This would give a space four miles on a side.

4*5280/6*20*10*15*4*5280/5=44,605,440,000 books. Probably a little less if you account for corridors. Most likely a little more if you consider the outer walls being covered in books, as depicted.

[Slipperychicken]

But serious, there has to be in the millions.

No big deal. He could just cast Scholar's Touch (Sorc/Wiz 1) on them. Or craft an item of at-will Scholar's Touch for 2,000gp.

It's a lot less impressive when he only needs 6 seconds per book. With the item, he could get through a thousand in ~1.67 hours. Without such an item, it's just a question of caster level and spells spent preparing Scholar's Touch. It's scary to think this guy could read +1,000 books in about as much time as a college lecture.

EDIT: It would still take him a while to get through 44.6 Billion though. He might need to get life-extensions to accomplish that on his own (or not, but I don't feel like doing that math right now). Actually, he could just get some helpers to Scholar's Touch the books for him, then he would cast Mindrape on them (to gain all the information directly from their brains with a single spell), drastically improving efficiency.

[warmachine]

The next title should be:

D&D Demotivators Episode VII: You Can Do No Less!

Best read with a Japanese accent, I think.

[Andezzar]

Probably too long but my idea is

D&D Demotivators Episode VII: Seven deadly sins, Seven ways to win, Seven holy paths to hell, And your trip begins

The second verse of Iron Maiden's Moonchild could also work:
Seven downward slopes
Seven bloodied hopes
Seven are your burning fires,
Seven your desires...

[Dr.Epic]

Probably too long but my idea is

D&D Demotivators Episode VII: Seven deadly sins, Seven ways to win, Seven holy paths to hell, And your trip begins

The second verse of Iron Maiden's Moonchild could also work:
Seven downward slopes
Seven bloodied hopes
Seven are your burning fires,
Seven your desires...

Seven Swans A-Swimming

[Vknight]

Seven Swans A-Swimming

My vote sticks with mine for this as a third
Cause no just no to the Big Huge Labs One

[Admiral Harkov]

Demotivators Episode Se7en: We have gungan heads.

[Ksheep]

I'd like to note (again) that we don't necessarily need "Episode" in the title, and that we didn't until the 5th version of the thread (4 said "level" and the previous 3 just had the number). As such, I propose the following:

D&D Demotivators VII: Now With Sins!
D&D Demotivators VII: Newest Wonder of the Forums
D&D Demotivators VII: The Vilest of Villages

[Notreallyhere77]

Hey, sorry for the delay. My flash drive went missing, and other drama happened. Here's the overdue tax:

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[enderlord99]

Hey, sorry for the delay. My flash drive went missing, and other drama happened. Here's the overdue tax:

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What about the universe known as Youtube?

[Esprit15]

What about the universe known as Youtube?

That is not a universe, that is a dark subsection of hate and anger.

Also, supporting the Big Huge Labs idea

[Hiro Protagonest]

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Luckily, I think the AI was dumb enough to make him look towards the wall or something (I didn't see what would happen if I aimed him towards the doorway when I ran simulation, because I just didn't think of it). But that guy would. Not. Move.

[Notreallyhere77]

Sorry, enderlord99. I'm going with Esprit15 on this one.

[Noedig]

D&D Demotivators VII: What's in the box?

[The Tygre]

D&D Demotivators VII: What's in the box?

Damn it. That was what I was gonna' go for next...

[Vknight]

Damn it. That was what I was gonna' go for next...

OK that is great I say we go with that just as long as its not the big huge labs thing

And posters for the next thread coming!!

[Sgt. Cookie]

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Luckily, I think the AI was dumb enough to make him look towards the wall or something (I didn't see what would happen if I aimed him towards the doorway when I ran simulation, because I just didn't think of it). But that guy would. Not. Move.

What's the source for this?

[Noedig]

Yay! I did something meaningful

[Hiro Protagonest]

What's the source for this?

Frozen Synapse. Turn-based strategy game that plays more like a real-time game with set pauses, so the action is in real-time. I like it a lot, because it makes it a TBS game with realistic tactics. What happened there was that I was facing almost certain failure, because the guy wouldn't budge from behind half-cover, and there was one entrance surrounded by hard cover.

[NikitaDarkstar]

D&D Demotivators VII: What's in the box?

My geek is malfunctioning, what's this referencing?

[Lapak]

My geek is malfunctioning, what's this referencing?

Se7en. Though for me, the pre-existing (and thus overriding) reference is to UHF, so I automatically want to respond "Nothing. Absolutely nothing! You're so stupid!"

[huttj509]

D&D Demotivators VII: What's in the box?

Pain.

Bene Gesserit witch!

[The Tygre]

OK that is great I say we go with that just as long as its not the big huge labs thing

And posters for the next thread coming!!

Sorry man, but majority vote's leaning towards BigHugeLabs, and we're runnin' out of thread. I've gotta' hit the switch.

EDIT: And we have launch.

[Noedig]

Aww. But I got all excited...

[magwaaf]

Lurker Tax:

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dragon fight inspires terror? f that! inspires us to make it a pile of loot!