LGBTAitp 27: Of Shoes, and Ships, and Sealing Wax

[nersxe]

Hello, all.

I'm the queer part of the alphabet soup. Even though I've known I have a nonstandard gender for a number of years now, I'm not real sure how to go about processing it.

Despite being an active internet-goer, I'm not really a part of any of the 'net support groups. I find it hard to get comfortable in them. It seems like people either push for you to identify (which I'm not keen on), or they're so sure in themselves that coming in as someone who's still working it all out is daunting.

So, I figured I'd come here, since I'm already comfortable on GitP. Um, yeah. Hi.

[Mono Vertigo]

stupid Internet problems
I'm very late for the whole fake ally problem, so I'm not even going to repeat everything I've already said in the past; I'm just gonna raise a "oh come the [REDACTED] on" and hope I'll never meet either fake allies or ally-bashing people IRL, where I can't ignore them just as easily.
(It's funny, though, we see these people a lot more on the Inter than IRL. As if physical distance, lack of immediate physical consequences, and relative anonymity made people much more likely to say controversial things. <_< >_>)

Got better news though! I brought BF to see my aunt and her partner, as planned. It went wonderfully well. We discussed a lot of things, including LGBT stuff (a demisexual, a lesbian, a bisexual ciswoman and a bisexual transman walk into a bar...). I was really happy to see them again, and it seems the three of them click really well!
And we got sugar pie (the local specialty!) and a bunch of other gifts.
I'm making a note here: huge success.
We should really see them again next time we come over. I have an awful lack of decent family, let alone family who can understand that the "female" friend who was regularly coming is now my boyfriend.


@nersxe: welcome here!

[nersxe]

stupid Internet problems
Got better news though! I brought BF to see my aunt and her partner, as planned. It went wonderfully well. We discussed a lot of things, including LGBT stuff (a demisexual, a lesbian, a bisexual ciswoman and a bisexual transman walk into a bar...). I was really happy to see them again, and it seems the three of them click really well!
And we got sugar pie (the local specialty!) and a bunch of other gifts.
I'm making a note here: huge success.
We should really see them again next time we come over. I have an awful lack of decent family, let alone family who can understand that the "female" friend who was regularly coming is now my boyfriend.


@nersxe: welcome here!

Thank you for the welcome.

That sounds like quite a gathering.

[Absol197]

Hello, all.

I'm the queer part of the alphabet soup. Even though I've known I have a nonstandard gender for a number of years now, I'm not real sure how to go about processing it.

Despite being an active internet-goer, I'm not really a part of any of the 'net support groups. I find it hard to get comfortable in them. It seems like people either push for you to identify (which I'm not keen on), or they're so sure in themselves that coming in as someone who's still working it all out is daunting.

So, I figured I'd come here, since I'm already comfortable on GitP. Um, yeah. Hi.

Hello there! First off, *hugs!*

Secondly, it's perfectly fine if you don't know what you might be yet. When I first came here, I was completely ignorant of the majority of LGBTAQ+ issues, and I spent nearly a month hanging here, trying to sort out what I was. It's a stage in the process, one that everyone, even straight, cis people have to go through, and anyone who tries to rush you through it...well, let's just say those people aren't doing you or themselves any favors.

So, to reiterate: Welcome, hugs, and be yourself!

Got better news though! I brought BF to see my aunt and her partner, as planned. It went wonderfully well. We discussed a lot of things, including LGBT stuff (a demisexual, a lesbian, a bisexual ciswoman and a bisexual transman walk into a bar...). I was really happy to see them again, and it seems the three of them click really well!
And we got sugar pie (the local specialty!) and a bunch of other gifts.
I'm making a note here: huge success.
We should really see them again next time we come over. I have an awful lack of decent family, let alone family who can understand that the "female" friend who was regularly coming is now my boyfriend.

That would be really confusing for most people O_O . Sounds like a lot of fun, though! I'm glad you all had a good time!


~Phoenix~

[Lix Lorn]

Well, better go find a sacrifice. Does His Lordship prefer mice or virgins?

Mice for him, and virgins for his translator.

Right, Asta?

[Astrella]

Hello, all.

I'm the queer part of the alphabet soup. Even though I've known I have a nonstandard gender for a number of years now, I'm not real sure how to go about processing it.

Despite being an active internet-goer, I'm not really a part of any of the 'net support groups. I find it hard to get comfortable in them. It seems like people either push for you to identify (which I'm not keen on), or they're so sure in themselves that coming in as someone who's still working it all out is daunting.

So, I figured I'd come here, since I'm already comfortable on GitP. Um, yeah. Hi.

Hi~

Your identity is your own; you do what you feel comfortable with; take whatever time you want, if you don't feel like identifying as something don't do it~

But yeah, we have plenty of people here who are still figuring stuff out and there certainly isn't a "you must be this sure" sign at the entrance.

Hope the thread can be a comfortable place for you.

[Mina Kobold]

Hello, all.

I'm the queer part of the alphabet soup. Even though I've known I have a nonstandard gender for a number of years now, I'm not real sure how to go about processing it.

Despite being an active internet-goer, I'm not really a part of any of the 'net support groups. I find it hard to get comfortable in them. It seems like people either push for you to identify (which I'm not keen on), or they're so sure in themselves that coming in as someone who's still working it all out is daunting.

So, I figured I'd come here, since I'm already comfortable on GitP. Um, yeah. Hi.

Hi! ^_^

Do not worry about being unidentified, everybody walk their own path and walk at their own pace. We are just here to offer help, hugs and silliness.

I kind of have very little idea what my gender identity is as well. So far I am using Genderqueer as an umbrella term, but I think the only thing I know is that I do not appear to be cisgendered. It is really confusing. ^_^'

Got better news though! I brought BF to see my aunt and her partner, as planned. It went wonderfully well. We discussed a lot of things, including LGBT stuff (a demisexual, a lesbian, a bisexual ciswoman and a bisexual transman walk into a bar...). I was really happy to see them again, and it seems the three of them click really well!
And we got sugar pie (the local specialty!) and a bunch of other gifts.
I'm making a note here: huge success.
We should really see them again next time we come over. I have an awful lack of decent family, let alone family who can understand that the "female" friend who was regularly coming is now my boyfriend.


@nersxe: welcome here!

Congratulations on having a huge success at meeting cool family members. ^_^

Now I want to taste sugar pie... It sounds yummy! :3

[nersxe]

Thanks, all. :)

[noparlpf]

Hello, all.

I'm the queer part of the alphabet soup. Even though I've known I have a nonstandard gender for a number of years now, I'm not real sure how to go about processing it.

Despite being an active internet-goer, I'm not really a part of any of the 'net support groups. I find it hard to get comfortable in them. It seems like people either push for you to identify (which I'm not keen on), or they're so sure in themselves that coming in as someone who's still working it all out is daunting.

So, I figured I'd come here, since I'm already comfortable on GitP. Um, yeah. Hi.

Hey there.

stupid Internet problems
I'm very late for the whole fake ally problem, so I'm not even going to repeat everything I've already said in the past; I'm just gonna raise a "oh come the [REDACTED] on" and hope I'll never meet either fake allies or ally-bashing people IRL, where I can't ignore them just as easily.
(It's funny, though, we see these people a lot more on the Inter than IRL. As if physical distance, lack of immediate physical consequences, and relative anonymity made people much more likely to say controversial things. <_< >_>)

Yeah, that's one of the annoying things about the internet. I dislike the anonymity, lack of rules, and inability to punch people that most of the internet provides. (Violence is bad and all but it can be cathartic.)

Got better news though! I brought BF to see my aunt and her partner, as planned. It went wonderfully well. We discussed a lot of things, including LGBT stuff (a demisexual, a lesbian, a bisexual ciswoman and a bisexual transman walk into a bar...). I was really happy to see them again, and it seems the three of them click really well!
And we got sugar pie (the local specialty!) and a bunch of other gifts.
I'm making a note here: huge success.
We should really see them again next time we come over. I have an awful lack of decent family, let alone family who can understand that the "female" friend who was regularly coming is now my boyfriend.

Hey, that's cool. (I wonder how that joke would end.)

[Asta Kask]

Mice for him, and virgins for his translator.

Right, Asta?

Nah. I prefer someone who knows what they're doing.

[nersxe]

Nah. I prefer someone who knows what they're doing.

You know, I was going to say something along those lines, but I wasn't sure it would be appropriate.

[Irish Musician]

You know, I was going to say something along those lines, but I wasn't sure it would be appropriate.

You will soon figure out, like I did, that we go from wildly inappropriate to very serious quite quickly......but usually at the same time

Also, a Very Warm Welcome!! Please feel free to voice any difficulties in life here, this thread, I have quickly found out that these wonderful people here are amazing, nice, and very quick to help out!! They are quite awesome people

~Matthew~

[Asta Kask]

You know, I was going to say something along those lines, but I wasn't sure it would be appropriate.

Well, welcome to the thread. Have you applied for Lix's harem yet? That's where all the best yuri is happening gathered.

[nersxe]

Well, welcome to the thread. Have you applied for Lix's harem yet? That's where all the best yuri is happening gathered.

There's a yuri-filled harem? Well, I'm not sure I qualify for such a thing (assuming you mean the girl-love definition of the word, if not I'm lost), but it sounds fun.

How does one go about applying for this harem?

[golentan]

There's a yuri-filled harem? Well, I'm not sure I qualify for such a thing (assuming you mean the girl-love definition of the word, if not I'm lost), but it sounds fun.

How does one go about applying for this harem?

You have already joined, merely by expressing interest. Lix Lorn welcomes all: her harem also includes yaoi, straight love, alien romance...

[Irish Musician]

You have already joined, merely by expressing interest. Lix Lorn welcomes all: her harem also includes yaoi, straight love, alien romance...

Yep, come on in, kick off your pants, and get ready for fun!

~Matthew~

[noparlpf]

Members of oppressed groups being intolerant pisses me off even more than members of privileged groups being intolerant, because they of all people ought to know better. >:|

As long as we're being pissed off at people:
Trigger warnings: Rape culture.

Spoiler

Show

I just saw an article on facebook about a flier at Miami U. "Top Ten Ways to Get Away With Rape".

Trigger warnings: same.

Spoiler

Show

So I just ran across this article by a now-former Amherst student about her rape and how the college dealt with it. Here's the school president's response.

[nersxe]

Yep, come on in, kick off your pants, and get ready for fun!

Haha, I believe I will.

Trigger warnings: same.

Spoiler

Show

So I just ran across this article by a now-former Amherst student about her rape and how the college dealt with it. Here's the school president's response.

Ugh, rape culture.

TW: rape culture:

Spoiler

Show

I think the first time rape culture really came to my attention was when I watched Glee. I mean, in the first season (spoiler alert I guess? I mean, Glee is now on the fourth season I think, so) a guy gets a girl drunk to sleep with her. She gets pregnant, has the kid, gives it up for adoption.

They deal with a lot of their relationship issues during the first season in a way that would be fairly realistic for teenagers- except that they never call what happened rape. It's three seasons later and I'm pretty sure they still have never referenced it as rape.

She was unable to consent, he did it anyway (and completely without protection, might I add), and yet he gets high-fives in the hallway (and sympathy when she gives it up), and she gets called a whore and worse. She also gets kicked out of her house.

In-universe, everyone acts like he was just doing what he always does, since he's noted for his sexual "conquests", and she had a moment of weakness. Yeah, a weakness in the form of trusting her boyfriend's best friend.

It's made worse because they're in the Midwest, and as someone from that region, I'll be the first to tell you that we're damned backward in that respect. It is always the woman's fault in some way, and even if he had run her down in broad daylight and violently raped her, she would still face social stigma.

[Socratov]

Lix' harem isn't only a harem, but also a plca of (pseudo) spiritual guidance and a frown-upside-down-centre. Cookies to the left, we'll tell you about the right side later...

[Lady Serpentine]

Be careful which cookies you take, though. Some of the things Lixie makes have interesting effects, from what I've heard. Nothing horrible or irreversible, but still...

[Asta Kask]

As fun as it is to talk about the harem, I remember that some readers thought it was really enervating. Let me just finish by saying that there are cookies to the right as well, but we don't eat them except on feast days when exxtra energy may be required.

[Irish Musician]

Lix' harem isn't only a harem, but also a plca of (pseudo) spiritual guidance and a frown-upside-down-centre. Cookies to the left, we'll tell you about the right side later...

Lixie always gets a rise out of us....

~Matthew~

[Lix Lorn]

Nah. I prefer someone who knows what they're doing.

Asta doesn't like me

You have already joined, merely by expressing interest. Lix Lorn welcomes all: her harem also includes yaoi, straight love, alien romance...

Yep, come on in, kick off your pants, and get ready for fun!

I sorta feel I ought to be offended, but I'm mostly just giggling. Also blushing slightly.

[Asta Kask]

Asta doesn't like me

You'll get a serious answer even though I suspect the remark may be slightly facetious.

I have all kinds of preferences - like most women, you meet some of them and not others. And there's a complex balance between various factors that is evaluated automatically when I interact with a woman. My main beef with you is that you are young enough to be my daughter, and I find the thought of a romantic relationship with so young a woman to be creepy. Oh, and LDRs are difficult given that none of us would ever have any money.

You'll find someone. Don't worry.

[Irish Musician]

I sorta feel I ought to be offended, but I'm mostly just giggling. Also blushing slightly.

Would you like to blush even more? That can be arranged, you sassy Lixie, you

~Matthew~

[Lix Lorn]

You'll get a serious answer even though I suspect the remark may be slightly facetious.

I have all kinds of preferences - like most women, you meet some of them and not others. And there's a complex balance between various factors that is evaluated automatically when I interact with a woman. My main beef with you is that you are young enough to be my daughter, and I find the thought of a romantic relationship with so young a woman to be creepy. Oh, and LDRs are difficult given that none of us would ever have any money.

You'll find someone. Don't worry.

I was joking xD (Although I did have a crush on you for ages :3)

Although I am getting mighty sick of 'you'll find someone', especially since, 90% of the time, I get it from people who already have...

Would you like to blush even more? That can be arranged, you sassy Lixie, you

Could take it or leave it right now.

[Irish Musician]

Although I am getting mighty sick of 'you'll find someone', especially since, 90% of the time, I get it from people who already have...

I will admit that mine was an act of God, finding my wife. But I say "you'll find someone" because I do truly believe that somewhere out there, is a person for everyone. I am still in awe of how I got my wife(had known her for 5 years before we started dating), and the fact that I love her so much, because I never thought, in a million years, that I would ever meet anyway so awesome.....or at all. So forget "You'll find someone".....because when I realized I loved my wife, I had already found her. Just didn't realize it yet. Don't let life get you down Lixie, because damnit, you are awesome and you WILL have someone one day.

Could take it or leave it right now.

That was quite a range of emotion.....
*wraps Lix up in a fleece blanket* Lix needs hugz people......
PILE ON!!!!!!

~Matthew~

[Lady Serpentine]

Trigger warnings: same.

Spoiler

Show

So I just ran across this article by a now-former Amherst student about her rape and how the college dealt with it. Here's the school president's response.

Spoiler

Show

So... Obviously, this person:

Why are we trusting everything Angie writes, specifically about Amherst College's administration? I think everyone should seek a little background information before gobbling up every word written.

is an idiot, and other things less pleasant. That is not something I'm disputing, or feel should be disputed.

But was anyone else bothered by this response to said idiot (specifically the 'male-bodied' bit, since the rest seems accurate enough):

You are clearly a male bodied, ignorant, and terrible person.

?

Although I am getting mighty sick of 'you'll find someone', especially since, 90% of the time, I get it from people who already have...

What reaction would you suggest, then? (Which, in case the meaning is lost, is a serious question; I have a friend who keeps getting depressed over that (other things contribute too, but, y'know, can't really go into it all that much), and if that can be problematic, I'd appreciate advice as to what else I should do from someone who knows what they're talking about.)

[Mina Kobold]

Although I am getting mighty sick of 'you'll find someone', especially since, 90% of the time, I get it from people who already have...

I get that too, it gets kind of confusing. Mostly because my best attempt at being subtle was "I don't want relationships, I like friendships. >_<". Maybe it is a way for people to say "hello"? Try saying it back, it might help. ^_^

I am pretty sure you are statistically likely to find plenty of compatible people in reasonable time. You are an amazing person and that was enough to find at least one person even before online media multiplied the chances of getting to know peeps!

That was quite a range of emotion.....
*wraps Lix up in a fleece blanket* Lix needs hugz people......
PILE ON!!!!!!

*Kobo-glomps*

Hug-pile! Weee!

^___^

[Lix Lorn]

Don't let life get you down Lixie, because damnit, you are awesome and you WILL have someone one day.

(eyeroll)
xD
While I'd like to clarify I'm fine at the moment, there is no paragraph that can precede anything along those lines that will mitigate it. xD

That was quite a range of emotion.....
*wraps Lix up in a fleece blanket* Lix needs hugz people......
PILE ON!!!!!!

They were meant to imply being somewhere between them rather than EEP!
(pounced)

[SPOILER]What reaction would you suggest, then? (Which, in case the meaning is lost, is a serious question; I have a friend who keeps getting depressed over that (other things contribute too, but, y'know, can't really go into it all that much), and if that can be problematic, I'd appreciate advice as to what else I should do from someone who knows what they're talking about.)

I don't know. Generally, when I get down about that kind of thing, there isn't anything that makes me feel better, except an indeterminate amount of time.

*Kobo-glomps*

Hug-pile! Weee!

^___^

(hugs)
xD