LGBTAitP #28: Come Taste the Rainbow!

[Arachu]

*Was gonna start saying why Pluto obviously isn't a planet and change stances halfway through, but couldn't think of a clever way to word it* >.<

Hey all, I'm heading off to bed soon. I just want to say that you are all awesome, beautiful people. I wish I knew some of you in RL.

Sweet dreams to all.

*hugs for everyone*

*Hugs~*

I always wanted to get a Long coat, and sequin it from top to bottom in dark, rainbow colors. Staring with a deep almost black violet at the top, and fading to a dark blood red at the bottom. It would of course have been won't with a top hat.

This.

On Pluto. Pluto's a planet. It just has a beard and carries an axe and lives underground. So do Ceres, Sedna, Haumea, Makemake, Eris, 2007 OR10, Quaoar, and Orcus.

New mnemonic:
My Very Energetic Mother Can't Jump Slowly Underground. Nifty Orange Pastries Hate the Queen Mother's Evil 2007 Sisters.


Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Ceres, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, Orcus, Pluto, Haumea, Quaoar, Makemake, Eris, 2007 OR10, Sedna.

Everybody clear?

Like quartz.


~Bianca

[SiuiS]

Fun fact on why they named it Orcus. It has a large moon, much like Pluto, has a similar orbiting situation including crossing Neptune's orbit, and when it's at aphelion, Pluto is at perihelion, and vice versa. Anti-Pluto was in consideration for a name. Eventually they took the name of the Etruscan equivalent to Pluto and named it that.

ETRUSCAN THANK YOU OH SWEET SISTERS
I've been trying to place that word for weeks. Oh,bless you kid rotting evil lookin.... Okay maybe not is better. But thanks!

Like quartz.


~Bianca

You are clear as quartz? Bianca no that is unhealthy you need to get that checked out, meat is opaque and even if you're cloudy well that just will not do.

[Irish Musician]

ACK
xD
That's not shipping hugs, it's shipping you :P

Meh, Same difference

the most compassionate of Daleks.

EX-TER-MIN-ATE.....the IG-NOR-ANCE!!!!!!!!!

[SaintRidley]

Siuis, no problem. And no blessings necessary. They kind of harsh the vibe I like to go for.

[WarKitty]

Does anyone else ever wonder if maybe they're playing at being LGBT*?

[golentan]

Does anyone else ever wonder if maybe they're playing at being LGBT*?

Yes. As mentioned, my sexuality is very confusing and I do not understand it.

[WarKitty]

Yes. As mentioned, my sexuality is very confusing and I do not understand it.

Yeah. It's complicated for me because I have this weird attraction-repulsion thing going with men - I start to get attached, but then if a guy shows interest back I totally freak out and don't want to go anywhere. Which I'm pretty sure has to do with my ex somehow, but then I don't really want to go into it because I don't want to deal with yet another round of "gay/bi people are that way because of abuse"...

[Arachu]

Sometimes I wonder if I might actually be androsexual(ish), but then I remember that being icked out by that bodypart isn't from lack of attraction but rather how... Unpleasant the website I discovered it on was.

Anyways, I'm sure some people would assume that trauma led to my bisexuality and maybe even blame dissociation for my gender, but that just isn't the case... That doesn't make my habit of questioning every detail of myself less annoying about it, though. >.>

*Hugs Kitty and Golly*


~Bianca

[Mina Kobold]

On Pluto. Pluto's a planet. It just has a beard and carries an axe and lives underground. So do Ceres, Sedna, Haumea, Makemake, Eris, 2007 OR10, Quaoar, and Orcus.

New mnemonic:
My Very Energetic Mother Can't Jump Slowly Underground. Nifty Orange Pastries Hate the Queen Mother's Evil 2007 Sisters.


Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Ceres, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, Orcus, Pluto, Haumea, Quaoar, Makemake, Eris, 2007 OR10, Sedna.

Everybody clear?

Very clear. :3

Not particularly relevant, but the explanation I have heard is that this is not the first time something has been reclassified after being declared a planet. As technology improves, so do our ability to figure out exactly what the different glowy objects moving around in the solar system are. For all we know, Dwarf planets may become a sub-category of planets once we sort out the problems in the system. Personally, I vote for reclassifying the Gas Giants as Orc planets and comets as Gnomes. We could make the entire universe one big RPG! ^_^

ACK
xD
That's not shipping hugs, it's shipping you :P

Shipping Celtic... With Lixie? I detect fan-fiction material! X3

[Astrella]

Does anyone else ever wonder if maybe they're playing at being LGBT*?

*nod*

Well, there's the whole gender-second guessing (which also comes with the nice "Oh, you're not feeling dysphoric right now? Must mean you're not really a girl!") but sexuality isn't really clear either. (And the whole nagging voice of "you didn't know at age 3, just mean you're not really trans!").

Like, attraction to guys in confusing; cause I'm not sure to what degree there is "women are supposed to be attracted to men" sillyness going on in my head. Iunno, it's messy. And there's also the whole being trans making my feelings towards "maleness" sorta iffy sometime. :s

*hugs and sympathies*

-----

Also thanks for the hugs and sympathies everyone.

Also; there's a Halloween thingie for my trans youth group next Wednesday so I'm hoping I can bring up the courage to at least get a new top or two to wear.

[Serpentine]

I don't know what this is from, but I like it.

Also this is completely irrelevant to this thread but the R'ships thread isn't back yet :c

Spoiler

Show

Bleeeegh. My mum is (totally not) trying to set me up with a guy she knows. This is awkward enough already. I think he might be interested in me. I am not. Could be wrong - hopefully I am wrong and he's just friendly. I'm just also full of awks and trying to only give off exactly the right sort of signals to avoid awkward conversations and such.
Bonus: he's the closest I have to a friend - or even an acquaintance my age - within a 2+ hour drive.
Just whingin'.

[Lord Raziere]

yea, I'm uncertain whether I'm genderless or female…. but I do dislike the hyper-masculine male image, but that only makes me wonder if I'm just rebelling against it. but still, I don't really feel that male is my thing, but I'm still deciding on whether gender is my thing at all.

[Coidzor]

Does anyone else ever wonder if maybe they're playing at being LGBT*?

About half of the GSA and my IRL friends in the LGBTA community at one time or another. Though I don't think they'd all have the same word choice to describe it.

Especially the ones who were still working out what was going on with themselves. But inner turmoil is kind of like that.

With how life has gone, I'll probably never know for sure now, but I've already got enough regrets on my plate that I can live with one more if it never decides for itself.

Yeah. It's complicated for me because I have this weird attraction-repulsion thing going with men - I start to get attached, but then if a guy shows interest back I totally freak out and don't want to go anywhere. Which I'm pretty sure has to do with my ex somehow, but then I don't really want to go into it because I don't want to deal with yet another round of "gay/bi people are that way because of abuse"...

At the risk of sounding callous and cold, I don't think you're in much risk of getting that card played here or in private conversation with anyone from this thread who would be able to offer you some actual counsel. Or even those who would be unable to do more than offer you emotional positivity and support.

[Mina Kobold]

I don't know what this is from, but I like it.

It is apparently a video from VlogBrothers, featuring Hank Green. Do not know much about that particular channel, but Hank's Scishow series is quite fun.

Also this is completely irrelevant to this thread but the R'ships thread isn't back yet :c

Spoiler

Show

Bleeeegh. My mum is (totally not) trying to set me up with a guy she knows. This is awkward enough already. I think he might be interested in me. I am not. Could be wrong - hopefully I am wrong and he's just friendly. I'm just also full of awks and trying to only give off exactly the right sort of signals to avoid awkward conversations and such.
Bonus: he's the closest I have to a friend - or even an acquaintance my age - within a 2+ hour drive.
Just whingin'.

Spoiler

Show

That sounds immensely awkward. Is there any way to explain to your mother that you are not interested?

Sorry if that seems like obvious advice, I have absolutely no experience in avoiding awkwardness. ^_^'

Re: Second-guessing: I have doubted myself a lot, including my asexuality and gender. Even besides my general self-doubt, I have worried that I may simply be easily squicked by sex and not truly asexual. What if I am just easily affected by the mentality of sex as a bad thing? I am still not quite as sure if I am deep down not at all attracted to peeps, but I am sure that sex is not something I want, so it will effectively remain the same even if I am wrong about being asexual. Still making my brain hurt, though. ^_^'

In regards to my gender, I am in complete confusion. I still keep to the Genderqueer label, but I am not so sure it is still accurate. Not that I think I am at all cis, though I do fear that I am just being angsty, but... I might be a lot closer to transgender. I may just be feeling frustrated with how people keep being so focused on rigid gender roles around me, but the stories about dysphoria ring very close to what I have experienced. Feeling wrong when I see myself in the mirror, wishing my voice was different, wishing we could just invent technology to let us choose for ourselves. So confusing. >_<

Sorry to get all gloomy. I kind of needed to just put it in words. ^_^'

[gunnar11]

Does anyone else ever wonder if maybe they're playing at being LGBT*?

I have doubted this for myself a long time. To be honest, I still am. I really screwed up a year because I felt different for not falling in love with anyone, while everyone around me was telling me of 'the butterflies' they felt, or how their heart rate increased, or they felt extremely happy, or warm. Anyway, you get it.

At one moment I told someone I was asexual, because I had never fallen in love, at which moment she concluded I was bisexual. She had asked me if I was sexually interested in people (which led me to some weeks trying to figure out if I was 'normal' or just a horny-perv), and I answered yes.

She concluded for me that, while I like 'being' with men and women, without falling in love, I'm bisexual. I'm still not sure myself, but telling people I'm bisexual is a lot easier than trying to tell the whole story or saying I'm asexual (people think it's weirder to be asexual than bisexual)

I don't know what this is from, but I like it.

He speaks many truths.

Also this is completely irrelevant to this thread but the R'ships thread isn't back yet :c

Spoiler

Show

Bleeeegh. My mum is (totally not) trying to set me up with a guy she knows. This is awkward enough already. I think he might be interested in me. I am not. Could be wrong - hopefully I am wrong and he's just friendly. I'm just also full of awks and trying to only give off exactly the right sort of signals to avoid awkward conversations and such.
Bonus: he's the closest I have to a friend - or even an acquaintance my age - within a 2+ hour drive.
Just whingin'.

I'm wondering: Can't you just talk to him to see if he's feeling anything for you? Because if he isn't it doesn't really matter if your mom is trying to set you up, it won't happen. If he is, though, you might want to sort things out with him first.
Either way, no one has the power to say anything on a relationship between two people, so I think you should sort it out with that friends first, let your mom wait a bit.

Yeah. It's complicated for me because I have this weird attraction-repulsion thing going with men - I start to get attached, but then if a guy shows interest back I totally freak out and don't want to go anywhere. Which I'm pretty sure has to do with my ex somehow, but then I don't really want to go into it because I don't want to deal with yet another round of "gay/bi people are that way because of abuse"...

Something with your ex?
Anyways: Are you sure it's because they show interest in you, that you get repulsed, or is it because you're too shy/insecure to just go with them, so you stop being attracted to them (like they are invading your comfort zone)

Just asking; I had the latter one for quite a while.




And one question for all: What's the definition of pansexual?
A guy I know said he was one, and told me it basically is that you can fall in love with everything and everyone, including animals, tables, walls, clouds, etc.
Is this true or am I being too childish believing that?

[monkyman640]

And one question for all: What's the definition of pansexual?
A guy I know said he was one, and told me it basically is that you can fall in love with everything and everyone, including animals, tables, walls, clouds, etc.
Is this true or am I being too childish believing that?

Pansexual is sexual attraction, sexual desire, romantic love, or emotional attraction toward persons of all gender identities and biological sexes. Thank you Wikipedia!

[Mono Vertigo]

Does anyone else ever wonder if maybe they're playing at being LGBT*?

Yes.
I've seen people, otherwise involved to a very high degree in LGBT matters, discard demisexuality as nothing more but a word heterosexuals use to invite themselves in (because we know there can't be demisexual pan/biromantics, or demisexual homoromantics, etc). Followed, of course, on brief but completely unnecessary moments of doubt from me.
Jury's still out on the "heteromantic" part, but I consider my libido is sufficiently low and specific for me to not qualify as an "hetero with standards". If I had extreme standards, I would still, y'know, have people I'm attracted to upon which I could apply these standards.

Hell, when I first joined this series of thread, I did it so because BF is FtM; it did not occur to me at first that since my sexuality does not fit the norm, I could technically be counted as part of the community. Beside, because of the nature of my libido, all I know is that I'm not homoromantic. I might be heteromantic, or panromantic/biromantic. Pinpointing the -romantic part of my orientation would require further testing, but unless my sexuality fluctuates any further from strict asexuality, said testing will likely never have a chance to happen. I'm fine with that, though my scientific side is disappointed no experimenting is going to take place any time soon.

[SiuiS]

Does anyone else ever wonder if maybe they're playing at being LGBT*?

Yep. Still do. Doesn't matter how much the info I have would make me roll my eyes if another denied it; I'm still all freaked out about it.

Which is silly but hey.

I have doubted this for myself a long time. To be honest, I still am. I really screwed up a year because I felt different for not falling in love with anyone, while everyone around me was telling me of 'the butterflies' they felt, or how their heart rate increased, or they felt extremely happy, or warm. Anyway, you get it.

At one moment I told someone I was asexual, because I had never fallen in love, at which moment she concluded I was bisexual. She had asked me if I was sexually interested in people (which led me to some weeks trying to figure out if I was 'normal' or just a horny-perv), and I answered yes.

She concluded for me that, while I like 'being' with men and women, without falling in love, I'm bisexual. I'm still not sure myself, but telling people I'm bisexual is a lot easier than trying to tell the whole story or saying I'm asexual (people think it's weirder to be asexual than bisexual)

This is why I hate the concept of One True Love^TM. The idea that you need to be certain things at certain times or you're less human. It's entirely possible that you just haven't found a good trigger, mate.

And one question for all: What's the definition of pansexual?
A guy I know said he was one, and told me it basically is that you can fall in love with everything and everyone, including animals, tables, walls, clouds, etc.
Is this true or am I being too childish believing that?

It's a small distinction, but pansexual is attracted to people regardless of gender/expression, bisexual is being attracted to 'both' genders/expressions. I define as pansexual because the body form is not germane to my attraction at all on a romantic and titilation level. Still think girls are prettiest though.

[Kindablue]

Does anyone else ever wonder if maybe they're playing at being LGBT*?

I've had a few identity crises, but never about that, no.

[Astrella]

It's a small distinction, but pansexual is attracted to people regardless of gender/expression, bisexual is being attracted to 'both' genders/expressions. I define as pansexual because the body form is not germane to my attraction at all on a romantic and titilation level. Still think girls are prettiest though.

Note that a lot of people who call themselves bisexual are 'technically pansexual'. Not everyone knows the label or wants to identify as such. The labels are pretty loose categorizations anyway and can mean different things for different people.

[Lentrax]

Does anyone else ever wonder if maybe they're playing at being LGBT*?

Yeah. I have, I do, and I probably always will.

[Arti3]

Yeah. It's complicated for me because I have this weird attraction-repulsion thing going with men - I start to get attached, but then if a guy shows interest back I totally freak out and don't want to go anywhere. Which I'm pretty sure has to do with my ex somehow, but then I don't really want to go into it because I don't want to deal with yet another round of "gay/bi people are that way because of abuse"...

This is why I don't talk about my childhood experiences even if I do think they affected me to some degree. I do doubt myself all the time, but it's not limited to sexuality.



I may be going to a birthday party! The birthday girl is helping me with the Fundraising Committee for my GSA but I'm worried about getting back to my dorms, they live a little off campus.

[Selpharia]

Does anyone else ever wonder if maybe they're playing at being LGBT*?

Yes, pretty often. I think part of it is like Astrelia said, that there's an "accepted" narrative for these kinds of things, and not fitting into that is always spawning doubts and fears, especially since being openly trans would be such a huge change. But I think things are getting better as I get more of a chance to see that those narratives aren't necessarily as dominant as their prevalence suggests.

~Laura

[Castaras]

On the flip side of the coin, I sometimes wonder if I'm interested so much in LGBT stuff because I've got something subconscious. Feeling doesn't stay long, but every now and again I still wonder (used to have some gender and sexual confusion, settled when I got older).

[Coidzor]

I may be going to a birthday party! The birthday girl is helping me with the Fundraising Committee for my GSA but I'm worried about getting back to my dorms, they live a little off campus.

Ask them if any other attendees are coming from your neck of the woods to do some nosing around to look into carpooling?

And one question for all: What's the definition of pansexual?
A guy I know said he was one, and told me it basically is that you can fall in love with everything and everyone, including animals, tables, walls, clouds, etc.
Is this true or am I being too childish believing that?

As you might guess from the responses so far, it's complicated, and a source of endemic disagreements as to the fine details. It defies an easy answer from what I've seen so far.

In practical terms it generally seems to mean you either shouldn't/don't need to ask for more details and that you'd also still have to ask if you'd need to ask the question of any other stated sexuality.

At one moment I told someone I was asexual, because I had never fallen in love, at which moment she concluded I was bisexual. She had asked me if I was sexually interested in people (which led me to some weeks trying to figure out if I was 'normal' or just a horny-perv), and I answered yes.

She concluded for me that, while I like 'being' with men and women, without falling in love, I'm bisexual. I'm still not sure myself, but telling people I'm bisexual is a lot easier than trying to tell the whole story or saying I'm asexual (people think it's weirder to be asexual than bisexual)

Which variety of asexual experiences sexual desire? It sounds almost like you are conflating sexuality and relationships/love/romance.

[Lix Lorn]

Meh, Same difference

Same result ;P

Shipping Celtic... With Lixie? I detect fan-fiction material! X3

Fund it!

Does anyone else ever wonder if maybe they're playing at being LGBT*?

I used to. I have a tendency to look at some random mental thing and go 'I bet I have that'. I spent several weeks doing some introspecting until I was sure about it, and that surity has locked that nasty question away pretty well.

[gunnar11]

Which variety of asexual experiences sexual desire? It sounds almost like you are conflating sexuality and relationships/love/romance.

I've found that sex and romance are real tight connected. As such, having a great gap between the two subjects makes me doubt. Now, you could identify it as romance-less bisexuality, or something, but I just call it being bisexual.
Maybe you can tell me a better name for what I experience?

Which is silly but hey.

How so? I think it's just perfectly perfect

This is why I hate the concept of One True Love^TM. The idea that you need to be certain things at certain times or you're less human. It's entirely possible that you just haven't found a good trigger, mate.

I hate the concept too, but hey, I can't do anything about it!

What do you mean by a good trigger? Someone who can trigger the butterflies?

Also: thanks for all the pansexual definitions

[SaintRidley]

Biromantic asexual seems to be the term you're looking for.

[Coidzor]

I've found that sex and romance are real tight connected. As such, having a great gap between the two subjects makes me doubt. Now, you could identify it as romance-less bisexuality, or something, but I just call it being bisexual.

There's interplay, sure, and really, whatever you're most comfortable telling people who ask, and simpler is usually better there.

But who one loves and who one is sexually attracted to, as far as I've ever heard, only really overlap more than in passing for demisexual individuals.

Maybe you can tell me a better name for what I experience?

Biromantic asexual seems to be the term you're looking for.

Sounds more like bisexual aromantic to me.

As for the trigger, gunnar11, I think that might have been in reference to falling in love or what have you.

[SaintRidley]

Sounds more like bisexual aromantic to me.

Whoops. Right you are. That's the one I meant.