Aggrieve - a Homestuck campaign IC

[sournote103]

It is the 3rd of Space November in the Space Year of 2012.
On the planet on which you live, Remus-3, also known as Alt-Earth, because that's a much catchier name, it is the middle of autumn, and the cold wind blows across your yard and/or lawn ring.
You gaze out of your window at your mailbox, as a very important package is scheduled to be delivered today.
The only question is, who are you?

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OoC thread here

[Vesth]

>Select Character: Draketh Oculus

Your alarm clock sets off, a sudden WAIL that sets through the cave that you live in, forcing you to wake up for THE BIG DAY. It's actually more of a mysterious chant that you SET TO MAXIMUM VOLUME, which hurts your ears every morning, but you bear with it, because it also SCARES AWAY THE BULLS that roam all over the place.

Your bedroom is little more than one of the MANY UNDERGROUND CAVES THAT MAKE UP YOUR HOME, and it is currently occupied by a four-poster bed with the symbol of the elder gods on the bedsheet. Ahh, what dedication!

And-oof. It seems that you left one of those Squiddles on the floor. How did it manage to escape it's prison? You're just have to sacrifice it, you guess. You captchalogue it in your SACRIFICE FETCH MODUS. It used to let you retrieve things when your pour your blood on it, but you fainted so many times that it became impractical. So you tweaked it, and now, you just have to apply the right pressure on it to retrieve things!

And now, time to pester some people. The day has just begun!

Pesterlog

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-- esotericVirtuoso [EV] began pestering eldritchBeguiler [EB] at 08:12 --

"Hèÿ, dûdë! Whÿ dìdñt ÿøú tëłł mê ÿõū łįkèd mÿthš èáłïêr? Ī'm jûśt dÿìńg tö śhårè the fórgöttèñ mÿthš öf thè ëłdēr gôdš!"

-- esotericVirtuoso [EV] stopped pestering eldritchBeguiler [EB] at 08:15 --

[Centric]

>> Be different.

A troll youth stands in her RESPITEBLOCK, a rather spartan affair, but filled with sunlight she deems CHEERY and other trolls would call SNORE-WORTHY. As in, any troll with reasonable claim to a sense of self-preservation would sleep right the hell through it.

Your name is AGALNE MARYAM, jade-blood with screwy circadians, and the only thing you feel like explaining is your HIVE. Alternian architecture is often sparse and drafty, but you have done your best to alleviate this by covering your walls with BOLTS OF FABRIC. You have the stuff in quantity, in a HELLACIOUSCOPE of colors, patterns, and textures, but you have plenty of walls, too, thanks to much of your hive being a MODULAR MAZE. You navigate it quite easily, not due to any talent as such, but knowing exactly how your fabrics are arranged.

"A seamstress always knows where her swathe is."
Troll Douglas Adams, The Importance of Being Earnest

Your memory for situationally appropriate quotes is unparallelled, however.

>> Recall DREAMS.

Tall order. It's an hour or so past MIDDAY where you are, and you've been awake for some time. How are you supposed to hold on to whatever was in your dreams for that long? At most, you're coming up with calm scenes, maybe ancient towers and a starless night. Nothing special. As long as it isn't visions of death and suffering and enjoying your part in it, you know the SOPOR is working.

>> How about that SYLLADEX?

Nicely locked up by your INTEGRITY MODUS, thanks for asking. MODII OF VIRTUE are standard issue for jade-bloods. You only have two cards open for use, as you have for AT LEAST A SWEEP. You've modified your HUSKTOP to address this, adding slots for sewing and cutting equipment, and have electronic versions of your favorite books. You use your other card for whatever.

You feel like bothering someone. Today is supposed to be rather important.

[Cyborg Mage]

>Be the other guy

"The other guy"? Did this bastard just compare you to one of the apes you have to share this planet with?

Well that's your morning ruined. You count yourself lucky that the poor sap you stepped over to get here invested in a house on the city outskirts so you don't have to deal with idiots like the one writing these commands all the time. Out here, nature is your only company. Unspoiled. Orderly. Peaceful. It really gives you some hope for the galaxy at large when you need it. Your room is rather plain and has more or less just a bed, desk and chair, but it's to be expected, what with the only being here for a few weeks and all, but your large collection of plants and historical pieces is naturally, and thankfully, fully unpacked and livening the place up a little. Next up is your literature collection, you guess? Yes, that seems like a plan. For as long as you can remember, you've enjoyed mytholo-

>Respond to the message

AH JEGUS WHO IS IT NOW.

You settle grudgingly into your chair and bring up Pesterchum. You suppose some of these guys you can manage, sure, and maybe you could call them "friends" in a convoluted sort of way, but-

Oh jegus, not this guy. Let's get this over with quickly.

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-- esotericVirtuoso [EV] began pestering eldritchBeguiler [EB] at 08:12 --

"Hèÿ, dûdë! Whÿ dìdñt ÿøú tëłł mê ÿõū łįkèd mÿthš èáłïêr? Ī'm jûśt dÿìńg tö śhårè the fórgöttèñ mÿthš öf thè ëłdēr gôdš!"

Your "elder gods" are just that, Draketh: myths. Not a single fragment of truth in them. Your obsession is a lie. Did you never learn that? That "mythos" of yours is fiction, a collection of tall tales dreamt up by a maniac, terrified by the inconsequentiality of a human life and determined to share his paranoia with the rest of the world.

Do not bother me unless you want to see what a real horror looks like.

-- eldritchBeguiler [EB] stopped pestering esotericVirtuoso [EV] at 08:14 --

-- eldritchBeguiler [EB] began pestering esotericVirtuoso [EV] at 08:14 --

And get a different font before you convince me my computer has a virus.

-- esotericBeguiler [EB] stopped pestering esotericVirtuoso [EV] at 08:15 --

You spend the next few minutes staring at your screen, smouldering with rage. That and wondering how the hell you are supposed to actually pronounce what this guy types. Never have you seen the common accent so brutally misused.

[Rokku]

==> Explode with rage

You are now BRITT SANDAU, totally awesome punk chick. Today is the day that game ninjaboy talked you into playing is supposed to show up, so you're waiting around for it.

It. Is. AGONIZING. There are so many badass things you could be doing right now instead of waiting. Waiting SUCKS.

You look over at the pile of slashed, gouged, impaled, and otherwise sliced-up SQUIDDLES in the corner of your room. Your dad keeps giving them to you and you keep stabbing them. Girl's gotta keep her blade skills sharp! You captchalogue a few of them into your ANARCHY MODUS for the lulz. Maybe you can explode them at someone in a cloud of synthetic fluff sometimes.

GAWD this is dull. Oh hey, ninjaboy's online! Time to harass him for talking you into this bull****.

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-- biblicalBombshell [BB] began pestering grandioseGrasshopper [GG] at 23:44 --
[11:44] BB: hey
[11:44] BB: ninjaboy
[11:44] BB: ninjaboooooooy
[11:45] GG: Oh, hi BB.
[11:45] GG: What's up?
[11:46] BB: when are we startin' this game thing
[11:46] BB: s-whatever
[11:47] GG: Soon, I hope! I'm still waiting for the mail to get here. It's supposed to come in today.
[11:48] BB: k
[11:48] BB: I am still not sure how you talked me into this
[11:48] GG: Aw, you know it'll be fun.
[11:48] BB: I guess
[11:48] GG: You get to watch the master at work. I'll show you how it's done. 8)
[11:49] BB: If I end up having to be some kind of military jerk just shooting dudes I might have to hunt you down
[11:49] BB: just y'know
[11:49] BB: fy-****ing-i
[11:50] GG: I'll keep that in mind.
[11:50] BB: there are a billion of those games a year and it is the lamest **** ever
[11:50] GG: I don't think it's that kind of game, though!
[11:50] GG: I'm not sure what kind of game it IS, exactly, but I think it's more of an adventure thing?
[11:51] BB: yeah I was bored and tried to look it up
[11:51] BB: the lack of information lead to an hour-long stab session
[11:52] GG: Stabbing is not a ladylike response to adversity, dear. :P
[11:52] BB: do not
[11:52] BB: even start that noise
[11:52] GG: Heh. I'm just messing with you, obviously.
[11:52] BB: stabbing is an important part of what I do
[11:53] GG: Stab to your heart's content.
[11:53] BB: man
[11:53] GG: (As long as it's safe sane and consensual, cough)
[11:53] BB: well what the **** else am I gonna do with all these squiddles dad keeps giving me
[11:54] GG: You could make improvised art. Like those giant sculptures people make out of AOL demo CDs.
[11:55] BB: ughh
[11:57] BB: i'd need like a hot glue gun and glitter and googly eyes and wtfever other soccer mom bull****
[11:57] BB: screw that instead i'll keep my blade skills sharp
[11:57] GG: You could consider it ironic?
[11:58] GG: But dear, how ever will you hope to find a husband? :P
[11:58] BB: irony's for jerks
[11:58] BB: and i don't think there's a dude out there awesome enough to handle me
[11:59] GG: That may be true. I think Mr. Darcy has been dead for a while.
[11:59] BB: i dunno what even that is
[11:59] BB: dudes are mostly afraid of me
[11:59] BB: and i dig it
[12:00] GG: That's not antisocial at all. XD
[12:00] GG: You could settle down with a nice troll.
[12:00] GG: I think they consider being terrifying an attractive quality or something.
[12:04] BB: man, trolls
[12:04] BB: some of them are kinda cool
[12:05] BB: but most of the time they end up being just as lame as humans
[12:05] GG: I don't think I've ever even met one in person.
[12:05] BB: they're all over around here
[12:05] GG: Lots of people pretend to be trolls on the internet, though. I guess they think it makes them sound tough or whatever.
[12:05] GG: I may have tried it myself once. I don't think I fooled anyone. >_>
[12:06] BB: can't imagine you would've
[12:06] GG: And what's that supposed to mean? XD
[12:06] BB: you're way too squishy to pull off that whole 'murderous warrior badass' thing
[12:07] BB: 'course when you meet trolls you find out that's mostly bull****
[12:07] BB: they're pretty depressingly normal
[12:07] GG: Hey! I'll have you know, within this pale and slightly squishy frame is the heart of a zen warrior!
[12:07] GG: That's cool about the trolls, though.
[12:07] GG: I'm totally cool with trolls. Not racist or anything.
[12:07] BB: yeah i guess in some 'we're all the same on the inside' way?
[12:08] BB: but before i moved here i was totes jazed and hopin to meet some ****ing METAL warrior badasses
[12:08] GG: That *would* be pretty cool.
[12:08] BB: and instead they're just dudes
[12:08] BB: with horns and gray skin
[12:09] GG: Horns would be awesome.
[12:09] BB: i agree
[12:09] BB: horns AND knives
[12:09] BB: my stabbing
[12:09] BB: would be so amazing
[12:09] GG: Your stabbing is already amazing, dear.
[12:09] BB: ya i know
[12:09] BB: but it would become SO amazing
[12:10] GG: Fair enough.
[12:10] BB: i look forward to utilizing my mad stabbing skills in whatever this game is
[12:10] BB: ima go
[12:10] BB: find something new to cut
[12:11] BB: maybe a sandwich
[12:11] BB: game better show up soon i am SO BORED
[12:11] BB: lates
[12:11] GG: Alright. Talk to you later.

[Eurus]

>>Be.

Very zen. You like that.

You sit in your BEDROOM, a chaotic jumble of gaming hardware and ninja paraphernalia scattered around as always. There is very little method to the madness, unfortunately, but it feels like home anyway. Most of these game systems started boring you after a while, and half of them are in a partially disassembled state by now. The weapons, by contrast, are neatly enshrined in their proper cases, with the respect such tools deserve.

The only one you can use without injuring yourself so far is the bo staff, sadly. You can't throw a shuriken straight to save your life, and experiments with nunchaku went... poorly.

>>Investigate mail.

You close out of the pester window with BB, feeling the anticipation bubble back up. So much for distracting yourself. You're really looking forward to this game, though! You stand up and look out the window.

The pale autumn light makes everything look kind of melancholy. Probably cold, too. You're not really keen on going outside right now or in general, to be honest. At least in here it's warm and quiet.

Sighing, you check Pesterchum to see if anyone else is online. If they got their games, then you'd know to check for yours, right? Right. Totally not avoidance.

Pesterlog:

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-- cyberCavalier [CC] began pestering grandioseGrasshopper [GG] at 00:19 --
CC: Greetings!
GG: Howdy!
CC: Has the anticipated package arrived yet?
GG: Not sure, actually... I haven't checked, was going to ask you the same. XD
CC: It indeed has arrived, but is still being modified so I know it won;t cause conflicts with the chip in my skull.
GG: Oh, awesome. I should probably check, then.
CC: However, I have the advantage by timezone.
GG: I didn't even think about that, I guess you do.
GG: Hmm. Oh well, I'm sure it'll be here soon anyway.
CC: Timezones aside, I've been running the integrety checks for a few hours, so it should arrive soon.
CC: Probably within 10 minutes, unless the post is delayed.
GG: Ooh, awesome. Have you decided on a server player yet?
CC: Not yet.
CC: I'm probably going to wait and see what connections must be made to fufill the chain that is supposedly needed.
GG: Fair enough. You know if anyone else has their copies? BB hasn't got hers yet, haven't talked to anyone else.
CC: I think I'm the first.
GG: Lucky you, then!
GG: Man, I'm really looing forward to this one. I don't know much about it, but it sounds awesome.
CC: That this file size, it better be.
CC: When you uncompress everything, the file size is ludacris.
CC: I think there is something special about this one.
GG: Hehehe. I'm looking forward to cracking it later, then. We should probably at least try it the normal way before I start modding, though.
CC: Good luck there. I can't even recognize the language it's made in.
GG: Wow, really? Weird...
CC: The integrety check required reverse engineering the compiler.
GG: But awesome.
CC: Whatever happens, it should be interesting.
CC: I'm going to check to see if re-tuning my motorcycle worked as well as I hoped.
CC: I'll talk to you shortly.
GG: Alright, good luck!
CC: Thanks. Hopefully your wait isn't long.
GG: Fingers crossed.

Other Pesterlog:

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AV: Hëÿ dudë, ārè ÿøu āwákê ÿèt?
AV: It'š ëärłÿ, áńd šömèôńê ìš åłrëådÿ pìššìńg më óff
GG: Oh, hey EV! Yeah, I've been bugging everyone this morning, heh.
GG: What's got you mad already?
AV: A błášphēmêr, ńøbôdÿ ìmpörtáńt
AV: but mõrē ìmpõrtáńtłÿ, whāt'š äłł thįš åbõut ā gåmë tødāÿ?
GG: Aaaah, sorry to hear that then, heh.
AV: It šêëmš quįtë â łôt öf pëöpłè árê ëxçìtēd âbóut thât
GG: Oh man, you don't remember? I could have sworn I told everyone!
AV: Abøut whāt?
GG: Yeah, Sburb is coming out today!
AV: Sbu-wåìt, łèt mè tâkë šömèthįńg
AV: báçk
AV: Whät'š thât?
GG: It's a new game. It's supposed to be really big. Some kind of super immersive epic adventure, I guess? My copy should be coming in today, and I was looking forward to trying it with all my friends! Including you, if you're not too busy. :P
AV: Thāt šõuńd...grëāt!
AV: Cáń ÿøu mód įt?
GG: Probably. cyberCavalier says the code is pretty complicated and unique, but I'm sure I can figure it out.
GG: Might as well at least *try* it the normal way first though, heh. Figure out what to improve.
AV: Aš łöńg äš wē gēt tø prāįšè thê mįght õf thē èłdèr gõdš, błêššēd bè ξίφος
AV: Høw ābôut thè óthêr prõjēçtš?
AV: Whāt ôthèr gámèš hâvê ÿøu ìńštįłłèd wìth thê mìght øf thè gôdš?
GG: I took your advice and made a level pack for Portal. Basically took the creepy factor it already had and ramped it up to eleven, hehehe. Got to experiment with designing weird paradoxical topographies too. Other than that, I'm still working on that Skyrim mod. It's a bigger project, and the art's taking me a long time.
AV: Yëš!
GG: I gotta say, this elder god mythology stuff you have sure is fleshed-out! Makes for some neat plots.
AV: Thèšè ārê ńót wórdš õf fìçtìóń, but thè fåçt øf thē fórgôttēń
GG: Right, sorry.
GG: It'll still make a sweet game if I can finish it.
GG: Do you mind if I put the Portal mod online? Some of the gaming forums I'm on love this kinda thing.
AV: Oh šurē! Môrê tõ šprëād thē truth tö
GG: Sweet.
AV: A̛͍͇̓̎g̖̦̬͕̙͕̒ͯ́̏́ͥ̿̍͠r̤̪̳̠̪̤͗̎͘ẹ̖̝͉̯̞͚̬̈̆̊͂́ͅēͮͫ̆ ̴͈ͬ̐̍ͬͬ͜d̤͍̯̖̙̠ͤ̐̐͗͐͢
AV: I thįńk thèÿ ágrēê tôô
GG: Good to know.
AV: Sáÿ, thê gåmë...uhh, Sburb
GG: So hmm, let me check because I'm pretty sure... ah, yeah! I DID put you on the mailing list already. :P
AV: Iš įt ä šôłõ gåmë?
GG: It should be a group game!
AV: I'm gèttįńg å çópÿ? :õ
GG: Hopefully!
AV: Hõw muçh döèš ìt çõšt?
GG: It's actually in beta, I guess? So it's not supposed to cost anything at the moment. It's a super-exclusive beta, we got really lucky.
AV: Evèrÿöńē įš ìń thë šāmē grõup?
GG: I think so.
GG: It was a little vague on details.
AV: Bÿ āńÿ çháńçē, dìd ÿóu šèńd įt tö...êłdrįtçhBēguįłēr?
GG: Beguiler? Oh yeah, of course. I sent it to everyone.
AV: I hâvê ā šçörê tõ šēttłë wįth hìm
GG: Awesome! You can settle it in the noble field of battle. :D
AV: Wē'łł šèè.

[Vesth]

>Check the prison

The prison's in the next room over, which...actually just consists of a large play-pen with lots and lots of squiddles inside. How did the one you picked up managed to get out anyway?

Anyway, your supply of squiddles is a little on the low side, and you suppose you'll have to buy more. Supporting the gods is a little more expensive than you thought it to be.

Other than the play-pen, a large window case also adorns the room, displaying a number of slender wands, all nicely kept. You flip open the cover, and grab the centre one, a well-crafted, beautiful thing. This will do.

Pesterlog

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-- esotericVirtuoso [EV] began pestering eldritchBeguiler [EB] at 08:18 --

Stìłł ÿöur tõńguê, łëšt ÿøu bè çuršëd ør wõršè. Yõur błåšphêmÿ höłdš ńö gróuńdš, fór thêìr pöwèr ìš rëáł áńd pôtëńt...uńłìkē šömè thįńgš I çåń šâÿ. Ańd mÿ mÿ çurįöuš dįåłēçt ìš...á šįdê-ëffêçt öf thê pötèńçÿ öf çøńštåńt mêdìtâįtìõń, ÿõu hÿpõçrįtè.

-- esotericVirtuoso [EV] stopped pestering eldritchBeguiler [EB] at 08:20 --

[Grim ranger]

> Be the guy

Now that is very vague. Can you maybe clarify a little?

> Be the guy impatiently waiting for the arrival of the game

Still not quite it...

> Be the weirdo that spends more time wandering around on half-baked "adventures" and levitating rocks rather than doing anything useful!

You know what, let's work with that.

You are now said guy, commonly known as MARCUS CRANE, ADVENTURER and ELEMENTALIST exordinaire!... Well, minus the "exordinaire" part, really. You are not as good in either of those things yet as you would really like to be, but everyone starts out somewhere, right?

Currently, you are eagerly waiting for arrival of the GAME one of your online friends has told you so much about! That is the reason you are now sitting in front of your computer rather than ADVENTURING as usually, since you promised that you would wait for the game to arrive and play it with your friends. As is rather readily apparent, you take your PROMISES very seriously.

Besides, you are kind of curious about this game yourself. But still, just drumming your fingers against your desk while gazing at the MAILBOX just outside your home is proving to be rather dull, so you decide to PESTER someone! Said someone is one of the friends you in fact DO visit regularly... And even if some do say it is an odd friendship, you would still be hard-pressed to find a better friend!

Pesterlog:

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-- articulateAdventurer [AA] began pestering ghastlyArbiter [GA] --
AA: Hello, my friend! Guess what day today is!
GA: It's the BIG day.
AA: That's right! I can't wait for the package!
GA: I'm hoping to get my own from father without too much incident.
AA: Propably the first time I have really wanted to remain still and wait.
GA: Perhaps you should have more games to wait for.
GA: You could use them, I think.
AA: What makes you say that? If I didn't wander around, we would have never met!
GA: True. Far be it from me to say how you live your life.
GA: There' sno arguing with results.
GA: Still, this particular specimen should, rumors being true, satisfy quite the craving for adventure.
AA: Well, we will see! I do not think too many have played it yet!
AA: So it should be quite interesting on all fronts
AA: Anyhow, after we have tried it, maybe I can get over there for some mazing? I need to keep my skills sharp, after all!
GA: You'll always be welcome here.
GA: I've had some devilish configurations in mind that I'm an<x>ious to test out.
GA: And on who better?
AA: Just...not the bubblewrap thing again.
GA: Oh, eternally, yes.
AA: Oh come on, that was such a cheap shot.
GA: We had such a good laugh about it afterwards.
AA: Well, yes. But still!
AA: Besides, where do you even get that much bubblewrap from anyhow?
GA: It's flown in sometimes.
GA: I think that a town nearby has a rather large catapult.
GA: There was something of a rivalry between my own town and that for a time.
AA: Really? Catapult?
GA: Most of the belligerents deceased or moved away, it's more a ceremonial thing now.
AA: And here I thought MY deliveries were unorthodox
AA: I can never against engage in fun of popping bubblewrap without shuddering from memory of that damned roll about to crush me
AA: I hope you are happy!
GA: Happiness attained.
AA: Now that is just cold.
GA: I have set up some warning signs this time, and a few riddles.
GA: They'll be avoidable.
AA: Just don't let anyone else wander inside while at it, we would not want to repeat the yellowblood incident!
GA: Ugh, two bolts of fine tyrian silks.
GA: It won't happen again.
AA: Yeah, I bet that the yellow didn't wash off?
GA: After much gnashing of fangs, I gave in and allowed father to eat them.
AA: Well, at least he got a proper funeral befitting an adventurer!
AA: ...You DID bury him, right?
GA: After a certain compensation was e<x>tracted.
GA: His horns were wonderfully porous.
AA: Ugh, sis! That mental image is NOT pleasant!
GA: Well, I don't suppose you'll be wanting the spiked shoulder pads I've left at the entrance for you.
AA: ...Spiked shoulder pads? Tell me more.
GA: The holes lent themselves to the containment of a tough metal alloy.
AA: I mean, I am still miffed about the thought of fellow adventurer arriving to afterlife without all his body parts, but still! I need shoulder pads!
GA: Thus reinforced, they will hold up nicely against resonable punishment.
AA: Sounds good! Maybe I can come and pick them up after we have gotten the game testing business done?
GA: If you can set your qualms aside, you are welcome to them.
GA: If not, then still.
AA: Fine, fine. I will desist on that front.
GA: BB might appreciate them, then.
AA: I mean, I will desist on bringing the matter of the yellowblood on the table!
GA: Nay, his matter shall rest firmly upon your shoulders.
AA: Besides, I would have thought you of all people should know the risks of giving her anything sharp!
AA: Or anything that can be weaponized in general!
GA: With her whole upper body outfitted with the wickedly sharp, she need only grow fangs to become a qullbeast.
GA: I digress.
GA: Games upon games. I look forward to seeing you.
AA: So I will not be getting those shoulderpads? :(
GA: Come and get them when you can. I might be convinced to hide them in a chest for you.
GA: Mind the tripwire.
AA: I always do. And for the record, the real adventurer checks the ceiling first!
GA: I will remember that.
GA: Well, hopefully, father hasn't eaten my copy of the game.
GA: Or hidden it away to curry favor with the Mother Grub.
AA: Oh, I will leave you to it! Keep the 'chum open so we can talk when we both have it, alright? :)
GA: Of course.
GA: Talk to you later.
AA: Alright, sis :)
-- articulateAdventurer [AA] stopped pestering ghastlyArbiter [GA] --

What a good friend she is, even if sometimes somewhat odd... But that is to be expected from someone not even the same race as you! When living on a planet with as multiracial population as Remus-3, one has to get used to certain amount of- Oh, someone else is pestering you. And it looks like it is Sean! Time to have a chat about this delivery you are waiting for!

Pesterlog:

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-- grandioseGrasshopper [GG] began pestering articulateAdventurer [AA] --
GG: Hey!
AA: Oh, hello there!
GG: Just wanted to wish you good afternoon. The game's supposed to come in today!
GG: Are you somewhere you'll be able to try it?
AA: Oh, I knoooow! I am just waiting for it!
AA: Don't worry, I won't go about wandering until I have tried it :)
GG: Awesome! I know that's a big sacrifice for you, Mr. Worldly. :P
AA: Eh, I will manage. Besides, if this game is as good you say it should be, I bet it will be enough of a recompense for my losses!
GG: I sure hope so! The info on this thing has been really scarce, but it seems like a high-budget thing. The company's unknown though, I guess?
GG: I'm definitely looking forward to it.
AA: Well, you're the one that hears most about it!
AA: So I will trust your word on this on!
AA: *one
GG: D'aww. Well let me know as soon as you get it, I'm looking forward to getting everyone together in-game!
AA: Everyone?
GG: Yeah! Well, you, BB, CA, CC, EB, EV, GA... it'll be a friendpocalypse!
GG: And I can impress you all with my sweet ninja skills.
AA: You know that you don't need to impress me, my friend :)
GG: Hehehe. Well that's no reason for me to stop trying. 8)
AA: True enough! I do hope there will be puzzles in this game!
GG: Yeah, hopefully. I know it's an "adventure" but that's a little vague.
GG: As long as there are puzzles and monsters both. XD
AA: I suppose! And we have yet to spar, you know!
GG: Ooh, yeah! That'll be awesome.
GG: I think BB will want to spar everyone too, so be careful. :P
AA: Oh, BB... Isn't that woman a little, you know...?
GG: Eh?
AA: Well, volatile?
GG: Oh. Well... yeah, maybe kinda. But I think she's not as harsh as she sounds, you know? She's not BAD, just... kind of intense. XD
GG: I dunno.
GG: But maybe the game will help her vent some of that constructively? >_>
AA: Well, uh... Best to live in hope, I suppose?
GG: Yyyyup.
GG: I'm like 80% sure that she won't try to stab you. :P
AA: ...That's NOT helping!
GG: Hahaha
GG: Sorry, sorry.
AA: No you're not. -_-
GG: Pretty much. But I can pretend to be for the sake of politeness.
AA: Eh, whatever. Want to play Portal while we wait?
GG: Sure!
AA: Cool! Time to think with portals then! :D
AA: When we do meet up, I want to spar with you, just so you know :P
GG: I was *born* thinking with portals. :P
GG: Looking forward to it!
GG: Just, eh... don't be disappointed if I'm not that great. >_>
AA: Never was :P
AA: Do you have many people to contact after me about this?
GG: Hmm... three, I guess? I haven't talked to eV, cA, or eB yet today, so if they're on I'll try to bug them.
AA: Alright then. I talked with GA
GG: Oh, good. She always seems like she could use a distraction from all that social engineering stuff. XD
AA: I wouldn't know about that, I just visit her hive for some mazing :)
AA: In any case, I'll boot up the portal while we wait :D
GG: Sounds good. Ooh, I should send you the level pack I designed...
AA: You do that!
-- articulateAdventurer [AA] stopped pestering grandioseGrasshopper [GG] --

And thus, you boot up Portal, one of the finest games ever designed by human race, and begin delving into the mysteries of the new portal-related puzzles while waiting for the package to arrive.

[Octopus103]

> Be Britt Sandau

You are now LUKE ZAMBWE. You have been waiting on the arrival of two packages all day: this new game that everyone's really pumped up about, and a shipment of pumpkins. In the meantime, you have been amusing yourself with the WORLD'S NUMBER 1 WAR-THEMED HAT SIMULATOR, Team Fortress 2. You're not sure why none of the hats are also weapons, though. So much untapped potential.

> Luke: Sprinkle Special Stardust on Cam Newton for luck

You anoint your trusty metal bulldog. Your MIRACLE MODUS always seems to have some Special Stardust in it for some reason. Not that that's a bad thing. You're not quite sure what you need luck for right now, but it can't hurt. You wonder how the rest of the day will go.

[Eurus]

>>Pester more chums.

No need to tell you twice, you're already on it. All of the chums will be pestered.

Pesterlog:

Spoiler

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-- grandioseGrasshopper [GG] began pestering eldritchBeguiler [EB] --

GG: Hi!
GG: Have you got your copy of the game yet?
GG: I'm really looking forward to it. I've never had all my friends in the same game together.

Pester x7 C-C-C-COMBO

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-- grandioseGrasshopper [GG] began pestering chaoticAbsurdity [CA] --

GG: Hey! Listen!
GG: Hey! Listen!
GG: Hey! Listen! Hey! Listen! Hey! Listen! Hey! Listen!
GG: Hehehe sorry, couldn't help myself. Have you got your copy of the game yet?

[jojolagger]

>> Be the Motorcycle One

You are now URRE de LYONES, or Sir URRE, if titles are being used. You are about to test out your recently re-tuned motorcycle. And while your at it, you might as well check to see if the chainlance you've been working on is structurally sound enough to not shatter upon use. You captchalogue both the experimental chainlance and your motorcycle in your Nth-dimensional Array Modus. It's quite a powerful modus, but most people can't use it beyond 4th without using a computer or PDA to keep notes. Because you have easier access to a computer than most, the difficulty of using it will probably never be mentioned again.

>> Test Motorcycle and Lance

In here? You'd never do that, there isn't anywhere near enough room. There is a reason you have practice dummies set up in the courtyard for this type of thing.

>> Go to Courtyard

You start your journey to the courtyard. There are a lot of stairs down from your room. This will probably take a while. Hint Hint.

[Cyborg Mage]

>Respond

Pesterlog

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-- esotericVirtuoso [EV] began pestering eldritchBeguiler [EB] at 08:18 --

Stìłł ÿöur tõńguê, łëšt ÿøu bè çuršëd ør wõršè. Yõur błåšphêmÿ höłdš ńö gróuńdš, fór thêìr pöwèr ìš rëáł áńd pôtëńt...uńłìkē šömè thįńgš I çåń šâÿ. Ańd mÿ mÿ çurįöuš dįåłēçt ìš...á šįdê-ëffêçt öf thê pötèńçÿ öf çøńštåńt mêdìtâįtìõń, ÿõu hÿpõçrįtè.

Meditation? You mean cutting up those inane stuffed octopi?

Those are sold for prepubescent girls, you know. Do tell me why I should fear any force which considers that trash an acceptable sacrifice.

And I highly doubt that cutting up stuffed toys in your spare time is known to corrupt computer software or the human psyche. And I also doubt that you even know the meaning of that word, seeing as I have not forced such fantasies on you.

-- eldritchBeguiler [EB] stopped pestering esotericVirtuoso [EV] at 08:19 --

Pesterlog:

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-- grandioseGrasshopper [GG] began pestering eldritchBeguiler [EB] --

GG: Hi!
GG: Have you got your copy of the game yet?
GG: I'm really looking forward to it. I've never had all my friends in the same game together.
EB: You'll excuse me for not having checked yet.
EB: I have a simply unpleasable little girl on the line convinced he's the dark messiah of some extradimensional horror.
EB: But I suppose you could say I'm looking forward to it, yes. Never said no to a little escapism yet.

[sournote103]

====>
You are now Draketh Oculus. You happen to glance at your mailbox, and notice that the red flag thing is up. You are pretty sure this means that you have new mail.

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OOC protip: No, it does not.

====>
You are now Luke Zambwe. You notice that someone managed to pester you without your noticing.
Pesterlog

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??? started contacting chaoticAbsurdity
Hey kid.
Get ready.
Today's the day.
Don't disappoint me.
??? ceased contacting chaoticAbsurdity

====>
You are now Marcus Crane. You hear the mail truck pull away from your house.

====>
You are now Laobhán Ó hAllmhurán. You notice that your mail came while you weren't paying attention.

====>
You are now Sir Urre de Lyonnes. You notice that the mail truck has just pulled away from your house.

====>
You are now Sean Doherty. You notice that an old friend pestered you. You seem to have just missed him, though, and he seems to have logged off.
Pesterlog

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unseenUnity started contacting grandioseGrasshopper
UU: I am sorry to tell you that your copy of the game has been detained.
UU: I have remotely installed it on your computer in lieu of a physical copy.
UU: I shall contact you again when I may.
unseenUnity ceased contacting grandioseGrasshopper

====>
You are now Britt Sandau. You notice the red flag thing on your mailbox is up.

====>
You are now Agalne Maryam. You have just noticed a message from some guy who contacts you periodically. You really have no idea what his deal is, and he doesn't even have a username, so you can never message him. You're not even sure he's male.

Spoiler

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??? started contacting ghastlyArbiter
This is the big day.
We're finally going to meet.
Aren't you excited?
I know I am.
I've started talking to one of your friends.
He's going to join us, if all goes well.
For now, just play the game.
I'll let you know when you need to do anything more.
??? ceased contacting ghastlyArbiter

[Vesth]

>Respond

Pesterlog

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-- esotericVirtuoso [EV] began pestering eldritchBeguiler [EB] at 08:19 --

I...I...I...


thê šquįddłēš...ìš uh...

-- esotericVirtuoso [EV] stopped pestering eldritchBeguiler [EB] at 08:19 --

-- esotericVirtuoso [EV] began pestering eldritchBeguiler [EB] at 08:25 --

Thë mìńdš øf thê gødš årè bëÿöńd õurš tô çômprēhëńd! Ańd...wåįt á mìńutê. Høw dįd ÿôu kńów I wâš šáçrìfìçìńg šquįddłēš? Høw dìd ÿøu kńów šó muçh óf mÿ rëłìgįõń whêń I hâvèń't töłd ÿóu äbôut thèm ÿët? I'vè öńłÿ vāgułÿ hìńtèd āt Māgńuš, āńd I hävè tøłd ńø øńê ôf thê quåłįtÿ õf thè šäçrįfìçêš I wáš ušįńg.

-- esotericVirtuoso [EV] stopped pestering eldritchBeguiler [EB] at 08:26 --

There is a mystery afoot. How did he know so much about your religion? Maybe he is an enemy of the gods themselves, sent to troll the lives out of their believers?

As you ponder, you notice the red flag on your mailbox through a window, past the bull field. Ahh, if only you didn't risk the chance of getting flattened by bulls every time you go to check your mail...but if cyberCavalier sent a copy to you, it's only fair if you go and retrieve it. You quietly step out the door, trying not to attract the attension of the vicious horned cows as you tip-toe your way out.

[Octopus103]

> Luke: Respond to enigmatic message

NEW FRIEND! You're going to give them a FRIENDSHIP ANEURYSM! Wait, but aneurysms are bad. Maybe it would be a funny aneurysm? No, that's still an aneurysm. You'd better apologize quickly.

Pesterlog

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chaoticAbsurdity started pestering ???
CA: I'M SO SORRY FOR GIVING YOU AN ANEURYSM
CA: :(
chaoticAbsurdity ceased pestering ???

[Rokku]

==>

Is it finally here? You think it goddamn well better be. If you head out to the mailbox and there's just a copy of Ladies' Home Journal in there or some **** you will straight up lose your compsure. The universe had best not mock a girl with your elevated capacity for stabbing.

You equip your SWITCHBLADES to your Strife Deck and throw open the door from your bedroom. Time to get this vidya gamin' nonsense going.

[Centric]

Pester GG.

You maintain two chat client accounts: one TROLLIAN and one PESTERCHUM, either used when socially appropriate. Unlikely to come up at all, but it's worth noting that you've always presented yourself to your soon-to-be PLAYMATES as a HUMAN via Pesterchum, and fastidiously avoided the use of the letter <x>.

Spoiler

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ghastlyArbiter [GA] began pestering grandioseGrasshopper [GG]
GA: Good afternoon.
GA: The big day.
GG: Oh, hi GA.
GG: Yeah! Got your copy yet?
GA: You've been pushing this game rather hard, haven't you.
GA: I'll be going out to check.
GA: With any luck, father won't have done anything with it.
GG: Hehehe, yeah, I guess so! But it sounds pretty awesome. I've never heard of the company, they must be new or indie or something.
GA: "Total Immersion"
GG: I hope it's not disappointing. But I'm pretty optimistic.
GA: Mmm.
GG: And besides, it'll be awesome to get everyone together in the same game.
GA: That much I think I can look forward to.
GA: Social games bring out interesting sides of people.
GG: Good! You need more stuff to look forward to. :P
GA: :P yourself.
GA: I have plenty of things to look forward to.
GG: Now don't be like thaaaat. Games are supposed to be FUN, remember?
GA: I stopped having fun long ago.
GA: But I will try.
GG: Maybe a nice adventure is just what you need, then.
GG: You can follow my lead. I'll lead us all to glorious victory. :D
GA: I do suppose that having ALL of us together at once will be quite the event.
GA: How are things with you and BB, anyway?
GG: Yeah! I think this is the first time more than a few of us at once have been in the same game.
GG: Hehehe, BB's the same as ever. She's pretty great.
GG: Crazy as a bag of hair, but awesome.
GA: That game of Team Minesweeper will never leave me.
GA: Her anger is... magnificent.
GA: Though I despair of ever finding my F1 key again.
GG: Oh gosh, yeah. That was pretty great. I'd never even heard some of those words.
GG: Hopefully some good old adventure gaming will be cathartic!
GG: Better to be stabbing ogres and dragons than people, anyway. XD
GA: Oh yes.
GA: What about for you, though?
GG: Eh?
GA: I think that all of our friends have at some point walked you through some sort of first aid.
GA: To add an ogre to the equation...
GG: Oh, yeah, well. It's a learning experience! What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, right?
GG: I gave up on the nunchucks, though.
GA: Sound judgment.
GA: I supposed that I should be off to check for my copy.
GG: Yeah! I'll... stockpile medical supplies, or something. Just in case.
GA: Just in case.
GG: >_>
GA: Talk to you later.
GG: Yup. Good luck.
ghastlyArbiter [GA] ceased pestering grandioseGrasshopper [GG]

This guy's all right. Friendly. Introduced you to most of your current circle of human acquaintances. Quite stable, and wouldn't even be a danger to himself if he'd give the weaponry a rest. Now-

Gray text!

No lunar cycle is complete without this guy popping on to mystify you or let you know that there' something you don't know but will soon, which for you is worse than just getting surprised. And which friend, anyway? Who's "us"? Against all better knowledge and previous experience, you begin to type a demand for an explanation.

Get pestered by AA (above)

Oh. Hello. This guy. Your first contact with humanity involved this guy and half an afternoon of remotely manipulating your hive maze while he struggled to find a way back out. And then he came back for more. Still does. You've moved beyond regarding him as a lab hellsqueakbeast and grudging tolerance to friendliness and respect. If you were FLARPers, you would be the best team. The best.

This friendly exchange has left your mysterious informant's chat window to time out. You can no longer respond to him.

[Cyborg Mage]

>Respond

Pesterlog

Spoiler

Show

-- esotericVirtuoso [EV] began pestering eldritchBeguiler [EB] at 08:19 --

I...I...I...


thê šquįddłēš...ìš uh...

-- esotericVirtuoso [EV] stopped pestering eldritchBeguiler [EB] at 08:19 --

-- esotericVirtuoso [EV] began pestering eldritchBeguiler [EB] at 08:25 --

Thë mìńdš øf thê gødš årè bëÿöńd õurš tô çômprēhëńd! Ańd...wåįt á mìńutê. Høw dįd ÿôu kńów I wâš šáçrìfìçìńg šquįddłēš? Høw dìd ÿøu kńów šó muçh óf mÿ rëłìgįõń whêń I hâvèń't töłd ÿóu äbôut thèm ÿët? I'vè öńłÿ vāgułÿ hìńtèd āt Māgńuš, āńd I hävè tøłd ńø øńê ôf thê quåłįtÿ õf thè šäçrįfìçêš I wáš ušįńg.

Magnus? They have names now?

I thought these gods of yours were beyond comprehension.

In fact, many things seem beyond your comprehension, human. Such as myself.

-- eldritchBeguiler [EB] stopped pestering esotericVirtuoso [EV] at 08:26 --

You manage a smirk. Now you have him unsettled. You can almost see the look on his face. Maybe, just maybe, you might be able to enjoy this morning. Well then, time to watch him squirm-

Hold on a second, is that your package? You mustn't have noticed, what with all this dealing with prissy cultists you're doing. It's probably a good idea to go out and get it. Besides, you need a little fresh air. Without further ado, you make your way outside and retrieve the package. That was simple.

[Grim ranger]

> Marcus: Reluctantly stop playing with portals.

Sighing, you apologize to GG and put the Portal multiplayer on pause for a moment, but somehow seem hard-pressed to contain your exitement at the same time. The mail truck is pulling away from your house, and that can mean only one thing: the delivery you have been waiting for has arrived! Truly, you have not been this curious and exited since the last time you were exploring a dungeon inside still somewhat active volcano!

Pesterlog:

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-- articulateAdventurer [AA] began pestering grandioseGrasshopper [GG] --
AA: Hey, I think my package has arrived! Whoo!
AA: I'll catch you in a moment again! Soon we will see what kind of adventures this game has to offer!
-- articulateAdventurer [AA] stopped pestering grandioseGrasshopper [GG] --

> Get ye package

With your friend reassured, you jump up from your chain and run down the stairs, intent on reaching the mailbox as quickly as possible. You are forced to sommarsault halfway down the stairs to avoid one of the CLEVERLY DISGUISED TRIPWIRES that your UNCLE has been laying around as of late to get you to slow down somewhat, but are not fooled by the trick for an instant. Truly, adventurer of your capability has to be prepared for anything!

Going outside, you run over to the mailbox, and check it's contents. There are some more usual-looking letters, but there is also a BOX that you believe contains just what you are looking for: the SBURB BETA, something that more than one of your ONLINE FRIENDS has been telling you about for some time! Preparing to secure your prize in your trusty PUZZLE MODUS, you are, however, intercepted by opponent most formidable!

> Guardian: intervene

Blast it! Why must he always get up to these SHENANINGANS at times of such importance as THIS?! Well, no matter! You draw your trusty KEYKIND forth from the depths of the STRIFE DECK, and prepare for face your ADVERSARY. True, some might question the usefulness of sword-sized key as a weapon, but it has served you just fine thus far!

[sournote103]

>Strife!

Your guardian approaches and attacks with his AXEKIND strife specibus, but you easily AUTO-PARRY the attack.

Crunch

Spoiler

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Combat map

Grim ranger, I went ahead and rolled your Initiative and Defense to speed things up.

Marcus' uncle spends 2ap to move, then 3ap to attack. He rolls a 22 on his attack, while you roll a 34 on defense.
It's now Marcus' turn.

[Grim ranger]

> Marcus: Execute 2x Keykind strike combo!

Having blocked the strike of your GUARDIAN with your KEYKIND, you move onto OFFENSIVE and make two wide sweeps with your weapon. This time you are PRETTY SURE you will manage to actually LAND A HIT on the elusive jerk instead of just TRYING TO STRIKE AT THIN AIR WHILE GETTING YOUR ASS KICKED.

Spoiler

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Attacking twice, thus spending all 6 AP.

Keykind strike 1: [roll]1d12+6d6[/roll]
Keykind strike 2: [roll]1d12+6d6[/roll]

[sournote103]

====>

One of your attacks misses, and the other is a grazing hit.
He then launches two counterattacks, both of which fail to hit.

Spoiler

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Combat map

His defense rolls, are, in order: 36, 27

His attack rolls are: 24, 27
Marcus' defense rolls are: 30,36

It is now Marcus' turn again.

[Grim ranger]

====>

Blocking the following attacks as well, you begin to grow somewhat more confident! You do not know what has gotten your uncle so UNFOCUSED, but you aim to take everything out of his momentary WEAKNESS! Nimbly dancing your way somewhat further away from him, you grip the handle of the Key with both hands and cleave the ground with it, willing the rocks that burst forth from the impact to fly at your opponent!

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Moving to J3 and attacking with Keykind and Terrakinesis.

Keykind & Terrakinesis move: (1d12)[7] + (8d6)[23] = 30

[sournote103]

====>

Your attack lands, leaving your uncle looking rather surprised. Nevertheless, he continues his assault (and misses).

Spoiler

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Combat Map

Marcus' uncle rolls a 24 on defense.

Then he moves toward Marcus and attacks (he rolls a 28, while Marcus rolls a 34).

It's Marcus' turn again.

[Grim ranger]

====>

Seeing that your tactic of keeping your distance seems to work well thus far, you decide to do just that, ducking away again and slamming your foot against the earth. A football-sized rock comes hurtling out of the ground and levitates obediently at the chest height for a second before you strike it with your Keykind like you were playing baseball, sending the improviced projectile hurtling at your uncle.

Spoiler

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Moving to I7 and attacking again with Keykind and Terrakinesis.

Keykind & Terrakinesis move: (1d12)[8] + (8d6)[26] = 34

[sournote103]

====>

Your uncle fails to get out of the way in time, and the rock strikes him squarely in the chest.
At this point, he seems to have satisfied his STRIFE QUOTA for the day, and leaves you alone.

[Grim ranger]

> Marcus: Celebrate one of your few successful strifes against your Guardian

You proceed to celebrate by doing a silly little victory dance and jumping up and down, raising your Keykind to point at the heavens! Truly this is an achievement you will remember for a good while! You are not exactly sure why it was so easy, though, but immediately ignore any possibility of him HOLDING BACK. Truly, such a preposterous thought cannot be even close to the truth.

Gazing towards the wide world opening before your eyes just beyond your yard, you smile to yourself, the small, familiar tingling of adventure hitting the back of your head once again. For some reason, you believe it is going to be a long day...

> Head back upstairs and get back to pestering

Taking SBURB BETA box, you head back inside and walk upstairs, returning your Keykind to your STRIFE DECK as you sit back onto your computer chair. While you have been gone, another of your chums has apparently signed online... So of course you have to pester him! It is, after all, the BIG DAY.

Pesterlog:

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-- articulateAdventurer [AA] began pestering anarchicVisionary [AV] --
AA: Hello there, Draketh!
AV: ...āhh, hëłłô
AV: I wáš â bìt prëöççupìēd
AA: Oh! With what, if I may ask?
AV: Wìth â...błâšphēmìzêr. But ëńøugh âböut thåt, ìš çÿbērCävâłįêr šêńdįńg ÿóu á çópÿ öf thät gámë tóö?
AA: I thought that GG did that? I mean, he is the one I heard about the game from...
AV: Hè çäłłèd įt Sburp ør šõmêthìńg
AV: I thįńk hë wåš thē øńłÿ öńë whö'š ëvër hêārd õf thìš gåmè, hā
AA: Well, I think it is pretty interesting!
AV: Trušt hìm tô fìńd thè möšt öbšçurē gámêš, įńdēēd
AA: There can never be too little time for another adventure!
AV: Tâłkįńg âbøut âdvèńturè, ÿõu'rë â tröłł, rįght?
AV: I hèärd thëÿ êńgâgêd ìń šømèthįńg çâłłèd fłárpìńg
AA: Nah!
AV: Nõ?
AA: A good old-fashioned human, just like yourself!
AA: Although I do know a troll...
AV: Ah, I mušt hâvè bèèń mįštåkèń
AV: Thìš pēršóń håš bëëń šçrāmbìńg mÿ šëńšêš äš ôf łåtê
AV: But šâÿ, I føuńd šõmêthìńg õf ìńtêrêšt ìń thè vôłçäńó
AA: You did?
AV: Ańôthër šèçrèt tuńńēł
AV: I'm šurprįšêd ÿöu dìdń't fìńd ìt, hähä
AA: Well, even I cannot find EVERYTHING, I suppose!
AA: What fun would adventuring be then anyhow? :)
AV: I føuńd á šmåłł pôøł ôf łävâ át thê èńd óf įt
AV: Whįçh I ušëd tô hèłp mê mākë ā fáńtåštìç mèdåłłìöń
AV: Såÿ, hõw ôftēń dó ÿóu fįńd šmåłł pöôłš ôf łāvá?
AV: It çôułd bê å gìft frôm thê gödš
AA: Well, small pools? Not that often?
AA: But BIG ones...the deeper you go, the easier that is!
AV: Dįd ÿöu fìńd âńÿ ìń mÿ vôłçåńø?
AA: Well, I didn't go that deep...
AV: Yöu dįdń't êxpłørè ēvërÿthìńg
AV: ?
AA: Sorry, I was in a rush that afternoon!
AA: Tell you what, when we have tried this game, you can explore with me!
AA: Deal?
AV: Hmm, šøuńdš łìkë ā góód dēāł
AV: Thèrë çôułd bë muçh tó fįńd
AV: Dìd ÿóu fįńd āńÿthìńg gôöd õń ÿöur 'tóur'?
AV: Artìfåçtš, tômèš, áńÿthìńg ìńtèrēštìńg?
AA: Well, some nice volcanic rock at least!
AV: Hmm
AA: It made for a good handle for my keykind!
AV: ...høw dõ ÿöu èvēń fįght wìth thøšë ìńfërńäł kēÿš?
AV: Thëÿ šèèm tó wįēłd ńø mágìç, ńör ārè błèššêd bÿ gødš
AA: Easy! You just need big enough of a key!
AA: You see, all problems are really doors to what happens AFTER the problem!
AV: But kêÿš ärē šõ uńwįèłdÿ
AA: So, the fight is a door to peace, and I open it with the key :)
AV: Sāÿ, whät thēń įš thē 'kêÿ' tõ mÿ bułł prøbłêm
AV: I rêáłłÿ ńêèd tõ çátçh šõmë
AA: Well, what do you need the bull for?
AA: We can never open the doors we don't understand
AV: Fįrštłÿ, I ruń thē rįšk õf bëìńg trāmpłëd ēvèrÿtįmè I èxìt thê dôør
AV: Sèçôńdłÿ, I ńēëd šómê bēttêr šäçrìfìçêš
AV: Hôw døēš thē rèäšóń hèłp?
AA: Well, it helps me to understand what would be the best key for the occassion :)
AV: Ańd whāt wøułd thåt bē?
AV: Hįttįńg thëm wįth łįtèräł kêÿš?
AA: Well, have you considered luring them further away from your house, maybe to some sort of pen?
AV: pēń?
AA: Yeah, you know.
AA: An area surrounded by fence.
AV: Thèÿ'rè hugè, fērõçįõuš, uńštóppābłè bēåštš ôf PURE FORCE. Evëń wìth ÿøur ädvèńturìńg štrëāk, I thįńk ÿôu wöń't bê åbłë tõ tåmè õńē
AA: Well, it will be easier when they are surrounded by fence, no?
AV: I'm tëłłįńg ÿõu, thèÿ çåńńøt bē štøppēd!
AV: Nôt bÿ ä mērê fëńçè
AV: Yôu çâń't štõp åń èruptìńg vøłçāńö wįth dįtçhêš
AA: Well, you can never know unless you try!
AA: And besides, how it anything within hundred miles of your place standing by now if they never stop rampaging as you say?
AV: I çóułd...wēłł, I'łł tēłł ÿôu hõw thāt wõrkš óut
AV: Mÿ hóušê įš párt øf thë uńdërgrôuńd måzē ārôuńd äńd uńdër thè vøłçáńö
AV: I'm šurprįšêd thât mÿ MAILBOX įš štìłł štáńdįńg
AA: I am sure you are just extragating as ever
AV: I'm šurë thāt thëÿ'łł bê ä wörthÿ šäçrįfįçè ìf I çâń gët mÿ håńdš óń ôńē
AV: Wē'łł šèë įf thē fèńçë wórkš
AA: Indeed! But the game first, no?
AA: I just visited my mailbox
AV: Iš ìt thê gâmë?
AA: Hmmh!
AA: What about you? Do you have it?
AV: I'm gõìńg thērê ńøw
AV: Hópèfułłÿ wįthöut bëìńg trämpłèd
AA: Good luck!
AV: Aš tó ÿöu.
-- anarchicVisionary [AV] ceased pestering articulateAdventurer [AA] --

Heh, you like the guy even if he is somewhat weird. Sacrificing bulls and such is not really what you would personally occupy yourself with, but everyone has their hobbies. You really do need to ADVENTURE with him again sometime soon, just after you have tried the SBURB BETA, of course.

Deciding to wait until you hear more from GG or CC, you return to playing Portal while you wait. All in all, your day is going quite well thus far!

[Octopus103]

> Luke: Pester friends

You guess you should probably get in touch with some of your friends to talk about this game. Your trusty ROULETTE USHANKA suggests Agalne first.

Pesterlog

Spoiler

Show

chaoticAbsurdity started pestering ghastlyArbiter
CA: Hi Agalne!
CA: Have you heard about this new game that just came out?
GA: Since we're going about this in a first-name manner, yes, Luke.
GA: Everyone I've talked to today awaits it eagerly.
CA: I'm excited too!
CA: It's supposed to be really cool!
CA: But I don't actually know what it's about...
CA: I hope it has lots of hats!
GA: You amaze me.
GA: Hats, hats, hats.
GA: Hats.
CA: Well, my Strife Specibus IS Hatkind
CA: And I'm always looking for new ideas
GA: I do sincerely hope that the game's likely not-inconsiderable budget has been poured into hat simulation.
CA: Just like Team Fortress 2!
CA: Except not made by Valve, I guess
GA: Skaianet, yes.
CA: Have they made any other games before this one?
CA: I don't think I've heard of them before
GA: They're new, I suppose.
CA: Well, I guess we'll find out how good they are at game design soon enough
GA: It's a considerable project, if the vague descriptions are to be believed.
GA: Perhaps you shall have your hats after all.
CA: I sure hope so!
CA: It would be boring if all we were doing was level grinding on some dull monsters
GA: Britt might disagree with you there.
GA: But anyway.
CA: Okay, I'D be bored.
GA: I'm rather more interested in the strangers this game will have us meet.
CA: Oh yeah!
GA: Has UU contacted you lately?
CA: No, not recently
CA: But some random person did
GA: Do tell.
CA: He said that "today's the day" and that I shouldn't disappoint him
CA: At least, I think it was a guy
GA: Gray letters? Absent chathandle?
CA: Yeah! How'd you know?
GA: ??? has been in contact with me for a while, and I find his abstruseness aggravating.
CA: Well, I haven't really talked to him very much yet, so I can't really say if he's annoying
GA: I suppose that you're the one he said would be joining some "us".
CA: I wonder how he knows this stuff
GA: That's what aggravates me.
CA: Still, he could be a good source of info
GA: He never says anything in return to me.
CA: I guess we just need to figure out how to convince him otherwise
GA: Your flirting may yet pull him from behind his gray-fonted wall of cryptic all-knowingness.
CA: That's a good idea
CA: I'll have to try that whenever he gets online
GA: Is it really?
CA: Well, it can't hurt, can it?
GA: I can think of any number of reasons that it could, but...
GA: Hm. Logs or it never happened.
GA: Deal?
CA: Sure.
CA: If my flirting ever gets him to open up, you'll have the logs immediately
GA: Heavens help us all.
CA: Well, I don't see you coming up with any better ideas
GA: Is that a challenge?
CA: Well, if we both try different tactics, then we're twice as likely to succeed
CA: That's just basic math
GA: That's just basic silliness.
CA: Well, with that attitude we're never going to persuade him
CA: Besides, there's nothing wrong with being silly
GA: And how do you suppose he'll respond to flirting from two directions?
GA: Actually...
GA: It does make a certain sense, however brain-numbing.
CA: See, it's not a bad idea
CA: You just need to keep an open mind
GA: An implied romantic triangle is a ridiculous route to take to the truth he holds.
GA: But I think that it could work for reasons I will not disclose.
CA: Or it could be just crazy enough to work!
GA: How very like you, Luke.
GA: Very well, a competition it is.
CA: Now we just need to wait for him to get back online
GA: We could try to provoke him.
CA: But how?
GA: Since he seems so uncanilly aware of our actions, we might ignore his directions.
CA: That could work
CA: Except he hasn't really given me any directions yet
GA: Again, I've talked with him more, so advantage me.
CA: But if he's online to berate you, I can swoop in for the kill!
CA: So really, we're on equal footing
GA: His chat channel seems to be a private one.
GA: I can't even leave messages when he's offline, or at least it doesn't show.
CA: Hmm...
GA: But let's each give the other our password.
CA: But maybe not over Pesterchum
CA: There are more secure ways
GA: A hat trick, knowing you.
CA: Actually, I did just invent a hat that functions as an Appearifier and Sendificator
CA: we could write down our passwords on slips of paper and exchange them that way
GA: I lack those myself, but perhaps I could borrow the use of one of my neighbors'.
CA: Okay then!
CA: Let's get Operation FlirtLARP on the road!
GA: If one of us sees the opportunity, the they can "swoop" in for the kill.
CA: Okay!
GA: Using the other's account.
CA: Ooh, subterfuge!
GA: I'll be checking for the delivery of my game and likely breaking into my neighbors' home, so the password may be some time in coming.
CA: Okay. I need to go check my mail for the game, too.
CA: The challenge is on!
GA: ??? stands no chance, and neither do you.
CA: I can't wait to see the look on your face when I win!
GA: That look is reserved solely for your own pink monkey face.
CA: :p
GA: Game on, Luke.
CA: Game on, Agalne!
chaoticAbsurdity ceased pestering ghastlyArbiter

You guess you should go check the mail now. And actually test that hat, come to think of it. It would be awkward if it turned your password into a pile of paradox slime.

[Eurus]

> Sean: Squee

It takes you a moment to notice the new pester window, and another moment of baffled staring to remember to highlight the white text.

You most certainly do not indulge in a gleeful squee before quickly searching your computer for the file. Certainly not. Only fangirls squee. Unfortunately, your friend is already gone before you have a chance to thank him.

> Sean: Load the game!

No, no, no. The responsible thing to do, of course, would be to wait to confirm that the others have indeed retrieved their copies. But... CC's comments from earlier have you incredibly curious about this thing's inner workings. Surely just trying to take a peek couldn't hurt, right?

Innocently, you start loading up some of the tools you normally use for examining and messing with games, and start trying to see if you can get a look at this thing's source code.

[jojolagger]

>> Finally reach the bottom of the stairs
About time. That was taking forever.

>> Test out the Bike and Lance
Good Idea. You extract the Motorcycle (1011101) from your Nth dimension modus, hop on, ready your Lancekind Specibus, start up the motorcycle, and an arrow flies past you, brushing you ear. Damn, he's practicing archery, and you already got the warning shot.

>> Strife!
Hopefully the bike is fast enough to mess up his aim. It's your only chance.