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  1. - Top - End - #1
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    HalflingRangerGuy

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    Default Stupidest hypothesis ever

    Suppose...just suppose with me here a mo---nevermind, this is just going to be idiotic.

    The Snarl was defeated long ago by the Gods, who continued to war amongst each other. The missing Eastern Gods actually exempted themselves from this fighting and created a paradise inside the world. However, to keep mortals and evil out of it, stories of the Snarl were allowed to persist.

    This is why Girard expected Soon to break his oath - a Paladin might not break an oath to not fool with sealed evil, but if he had given an oath to not speak of a hidden paradise? That might be why Girard expected him to welch on his oath within weeks.

    Heck, the Girard skeleton we found might have been someone else entirely; Girard and Serini might be sitting on a beach somewhere inside the rift, sipping mai tais.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Messenger View Post
    I really would rather Tarquin finally just went all George R. R. Martin on Nale.
    That's right - George R. R. Martin; a writer so ruthless, his name is a verb akin to Samuel L. Jackson. Valar morghulis.

    Quote Originally Posted by The Giant View Post
    The only thing worse than the usual irrelevant rules pedantry is incorrect irrelevant rules pedantry.

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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    It's possible, I'll give you that.

    But the title underhyped it. I've seen much stupider hypotheses.
    Last edited by GreatWyrmGold; 2013-07-15 at 08:31 AM.
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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    Not a terrible hypothesis. But as long as the "they're still in an illusion!" People exist, it'll be hard to be Top Stupid Theory.

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    GreataxeFighterGirl

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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    Quote Originally Posted by Kiraxa View Post
    Not a terrible hypothesis. But as long as the "they're still in an illusion!" People exist, it'll be hard to be Top Stupid Theory.
    The last panel of the last strip in the last book, many years from now, will feature the OotS standing still in that corridor in the pyramid, with the runes glowing.
    Last edited by Ellye; 2013-07-15 at 08:51 AM.

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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    This actually gives me the idea that maybe the Eastern gods survived and were still fighting to subdue the snarl from within all this time. By now they have conquered it and are getting on with creating a new world where they have been trapped.

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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    Who killed Soon's wife then? I expect that snarl just got tired of waiting and created a world himself... But how would that move the plot is beyond me.
    Paradise for eastern gods also doesn't give much chance for climatic ending...
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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    Quote Originally Posted by Michaeler View Post
    This actually gives me the idea that maybe the Eastern gods survived and were still fighting to subdue the snarl from within all this time. By now they have conquered it and are getting on with creating a new world where they have been trapped.
    This is where my money is, and I really want to see it. I LOVE whatever unnamed ancient civilization the Eastern gods were loosely based on, and I hope to see Rich's take on it.

    What is this "Athens" of which you speak?
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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    It's not that stupid....
    If my usage of language is confusing or too complicated for your comprehension, I apologize. I suffer from a mild mental disorder that sometimes makes me inclined to both type and speak in an unusual manner.

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    HalflingRangerGuy

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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    Quote Originally Posted by Fan67 View Post
    Who killed Soon's wife then? I expect that snarl just got tired of waiting and created a world himself... But how would that move the plot is beyond me.
    Paradise for eastern gods also doesn't give much chance for climatic ending...
    *Shrugs.* Some random Mage/undead/other evil from the other side? Could be any number of explanations with an entire world in there. Wouldn't be quite as "paradise" as I was thinking it to be, but hey. Or it could even just have been a surge of energy from the rift opening in the first place.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Messenger View Post
    I really would rather Tarquin finally just went all George R. R. Martin on Nale.
    That's right - George R. R. Martin; a writer so ruthless, his name is a verb akin to Samuel L. Jackson. Valar morghulis.

    Quote Originally Posted by The Giant View Post
    The only thing worse than the usual irrelevant rules pedantry is incorrect irrelevant rules pedantry.

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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    Quote Originally Posted by FlawedParadigm View Post
    Suppose...just suppose with me here a mo---nevermind, this is just going to be idiotic.
    Actually it is kind of clever, in its own way, which has almost zero to do with the "reality" of the strip. But such clever ideas are a dime-a-dozen in places like universities just filled with people in love with their own brain power and its creations instead of the facts.
    Essentially the idea says "let's forget everything we know and invent something entirely different." We can do that dozens of times, and the results will be entertaining, but they won't be reality.

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    HalflingRangerGuy

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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    Quote Originally Posted by David Argall View Post
    Actually it is kind of clever, in its own way, which has almost zero to do with the "reality" of the strip. But such clever ideas are a dime-a-dozen in places like universities just filled with people in love with their own brain power and its creations instead of the facts.
    Essentially the idea says "let's forget everything we know and invent something entirely different." We can do that dozens of times, and the results will be entertaining, but they won't be reality.
    I know you're a contrarian and all, but the only things this idea contradicts are the things we've been told several times by now aren't necessarily true. We know there's more than the Snarl inside the rifts, which is originally all that was said to be in there. In fact, the only proof we have of the Snarl at all are the things Redcloak knows, which come from The Dark One, who could have been lied to, or perhaps even the Gods don't know everything that's going on here. We certainly haven't seen anything in strip to show they've had the slightest bit of interest (aside from mild Thor intervention) in this whole thing.

    V has specifically pointed out to the audience twice that the Order is underinformed for the task they are performing. The IFCC is specifically keeping V at this very moment from sharing V's knowledge. Whatever the truth within the rifts is, this strip blatantly proves that What We Knew Before Was Wrong. So yes, any theories about what's going on now are going to contradict the previously established "facts" - because they were at least on some level erroneous to begin with. Belkar has it figured out now. Do you need 200 foot tall flaming letters? Perhaps you have something better to share?
    Last edited by FlawedParadigm; 2013-07-15 at 12:10 PM.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Messenger View Post
    I really would rather Tarquin finally just went all George R. R. Martin on Nale.
    That's right - George R. R. Martin; a writer so ruthless, his name is a verb akin to Samuel L. Jackson. Valar morghulis.

    Quote Originally Posted by The Giant View Post
    The only thing worse than the usual irrelevant rules pedantry is incorrect irrelevant rules pedantry.

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    DwarfBarbarianGuy

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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    I've had MUCH stupider hypothosys. Like the countdown clock.
    http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showt...6#post15476516


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    Bagnold could be one sixty-fourth halfling.

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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    Quote Originally Posted by Kiraxa View Post
    Not a terrible hypothesis. But as long as the "they're still in an illusion!" People exist, it'll be hard to be Top Stupid Theory.
    The illusion was cast by Girard's desert "bomb" trap (it wasn't a bomb). Everything's been an illusion since!

    Tarquin is a figment. He's what the illusion metric produced when it was forced to combine Elan's wish fulfillment with Roy's cynicism and Haley's paranoia.

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    NinjaGuy

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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    Quote Originally Posted by GreatWyrmGold View Post
    I've seen much stupider hypotheses.
    It has nothing to do with Therkla, Haley, and/or
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    Right-Eye's Daughter
    for one.

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    David Argall's Avatar

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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    Quote Originally Posted by FlawedParadigm View Post
    the only things this idea contradicts are the things we've been told several times by now aren't necessarily true.
    "Aren't necessarily true" does not mean false. In fact it most commonly means there is "only" a 99% chance of it being true.

    Quote Originally Posted by FlawedParadigm View Post
    We know there's more than the Snarl inside the rifts, which is originally all that was said to be in there.
    We may have assumed that, but the statements we are given do not tell us the prison was empty, merely that the Snarl could not get out.

    Quote Originally Posted by FlawedParadigm View Post
    In fact, the only proof we have of the Snarl at all are the things Redcloak knows, which come from The Dark One,
    We get more evidence from the Sapphire Guard.

    Quote Originally Posted by FlawedParadigm View Post
    V has specifically pointed out to the audience twice that the Order is underinformed for the task they are performing.
    V has worries, and a quite unstable mental state, but no evidence the OOTS is doing other than the correct action.

    Quote Originally Posted by FlawedParadigm View Post
    The IFCC is specifically keeping V at this very moment from sharing V's knowledge.
    The motives of the IFCC are a mystery and keeping information from the OOTS simply is not enough motive to explain what they are up to.

    Quote Originally Posted by FlawedParadigm View Post
    Whatever the truth within the rifts is, this strip blatantly proves that What We Knew Before Was Wrong.
    This strip shows the party discovering the tiger has stripes. The party has not gained any information about its diet, and has no reason to to challenge the theory it is a meat-eater.

    Quote Originally Posted by FlawedParadigm View Post
    So yes, any theories about what's going on now are going to contradict the previously established "facts" - because they were at least on some level erroneous to begin with.
    This theory, like many of its type, pretty much rejects the information given wholesale, and then proposes what is entirely an unsupported fancy.

    Quote Originally Posted by FlawedParadigm View Post
    Belkar has it figured out now.
    Belkar is the one described as the one with the intellect of a table [which may be an insult to tables].

    Quote Originally Posted by FlawedParadigm View Post
    Perhaps you have something better to share?
    I have. But a better idea would be to wait a couple of weeks for when we have a little more information before we try such daydreams.

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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    Quote Originally Posted by David Argall View Post
    Belkar is the one described as the one with the intellect of a table [which may be an insult to tables].
    That's his point. Even Belkar was able to smell the rat, therefore it is extremely obvious that something isn't adding up.
    I'm rather inconsistent. But I'm consistent in my inconsistency!
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    Orc in the Playground
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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    I like the Eastern Gods aspect.. perhaps they took their own threads and created their own world instead.

    Which would mean everything the Dark One was told was untrue.. not sure what the motivation would have been... perhaps the other gods are worried about competition? Can't really think of anything else but it's a big question mark.

    Oh and

    Quote Originally Posted by David Argall View Post
    We get more evidence from the Sapphire Guard.
    It's quite possible that the Sapphire Guard got their information from interrogating goblins. The means of discovering the information was quite vague as I recall.
    "For you see, I theorize that the halfling does not possess a true sentient brain, like you or I, but rather a simple lump of nerve tissue that serves as a primitive "proto-brain" that can only process two emotional reactions to people: Hate or Lust."

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    Barbarian in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    Quote Originally Posted by Lombard View Post
    I like the Eastern Gods aspect.. perhaps they took their own threads and created their own world instead.

    Which would mean everything the Dark One was told was untrue.. not sure what the motivation would have been... perhaps the other gods are worried about competition? Can't really think of anything else but it's a big question mark.

    Oh and



    It's quite possible that the Sapphire Guard got their information from interrogating goblins. The means of discovering the information was quite vague as I recall.
    The Order of the Scribble couldn't have gotten all of their information on the Gates from the goblins, though.

    SoD Spoilers
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    Xykon and Redcloak didn't know there was more than one rift until after Lirian told them by accident. So clearly the Scribblers didn't rely solely on the goblins for their information.

    Also, for what it's worth, Redcloak said the Dark One's goblin agents were thwarted first by the Scribblers and then by the Sapphire Guard, implying that the Guard didn't interfere in the conflict over the Gates until after the Scribblers were largely done with adventuring. Technically this information comes from the knowledge imparted by the red cloak, I think, but as it's real, down-to-Stickworld history that took place only 30 or so years before Redcloak's time, I think we can assume its accuracy. So again, I somewhat doubt that the Sapphire Guard got their cosmological knowledge of SnarlHistory from the goblins.

    Also, the Guard was founded by Soon after his adventuring days were largely behind him, though I suppose it could be argued that the Azurites were waging war with the goblins even before Soon came along, and discovered this information independently from the Scribblers.
    Quote Originally Posted by Kish View Post
    When Durkon gets hungry, he'll come through the OotS-verse's notoriously fragile fourth wall and dine on the people who have called him something goofy.

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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    One thing is for certain: Soon's wife was killed by something reaching through the rifts. Being a Paladin, he's the least likely party to have lied, IMO.
    Haley: Oh, I guess I'll just have to accept getting twice as much gold as the rest of you.
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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    Quote Originally Posted by Anatares View Post
    One thing is for certain: Soon's wife was killed by something reaching through the rifts. Being a Paladin, he's the least likely party to have lied, IMO.
    That's the one piece of evidence that stands in the way of my pet theory: Soon's wife's body. I like the idea that the rifts are unstable without the gates, and that they might suddenly expand or shrink, which activity could be construed as a snarl of some kind. Anyone (anything?) that is touched by the rift is instantly transported to the other world (multiverse?) and lost to this one, including the outer planes. As far as anyone can tell, they have been unmade, but they continue to live in the other world.* It's neat, it fits, and it's simple.

    But then there's Soon's wife's body, which is there and has been killed by something to do with the rift. Why she alone**, even including the Eastern Gods, was not unmade is a mystery. And it kills my theory.



    *Unless they went through the Azure City rift and found themselves in rapidly-decaying orbit.

    **As far as I can tell from the comic. I may have missed something.

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    HalflingRangerGuy

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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    I know baiting people into pointless arguments over semantics is your pet hobby, David, but I'm not interested in being involved. For one, I'm fairly certain the chances of anything in the original post being more than vaguely correct are abysmal. Which is why I titled the thread as I did. It's a random line of amusing thought which isn't directly contradicted anywhere by the source material. Of course with as little as we actually know about what's inside the rift, almost any line of conjecture is possible.

    A dragon could have reached through and killed Soon's wife. Any number of things could have. It's entirely possible that Soon saw *something* kill his wife, not necessarily what was pictured. In the shock of the moment, his mind could have seen just about anything.

    Or a hundred thousand other possibilities. There's an unknown world in there. I was just wanting to get peoples' minds going and they could all talk about their theories and have some fun.

    If you don't like it or get it, that's fine. But don't come in here ruining for everyone else. Actually I'd be perfectly pleased if you never responded to any of my posts or threads. I usually go out of my way to avoid you as is.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Messenger View Post
    I really would rather Tarquin finally just went all George R. R. Martin on Nale.
    That's right - George R. R. Martin; a writer so ruthless, his name is a verb akin to Samuel L. Jackson. Valar morghulis.

    Quote Originally Posted by The Giant View Post
    The only thing worse than the usual irrelevant rules pedantry is incorrect irrelevant rules pedantry.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Emanick View Post
    The Order of the Scribble couldn't have gotten all of their information on the Gates from the goblins, though.

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    Xykon and Redcloak didn't know there was more than one rift until after Lirian told them by accident. So clearly the Scribblers didn't rely solely on the goblins for their information.

    Also, for what it's worth, Redcloak said the Dark One's goblin agents were thwarted first by the Scribblers and then by the Sapphire Guard, implying that the Guard didn't interfere in the conflict over the Gates until after the Scribblers were largely done with adventuring. Technically this information comes from the knowledge imparted by the red cloak, I think, but as it's real, down-to-Stickworld history that took place only 30 or so years before Redcloak's time, I think we can assume its accuracy. So again, I somewhat doubt that the Sapphire Guard got their cosmological knowledge of SnarlHistory from the goblins.

    Also, the Guard was founded by Soon after his adventuring days were largely behind him, though I suppose it could be argued that the Azurites were waging war with the goblins even before Soon came along, and discovered this information independently from the Scribblers.
    You're quite right, actually. I'd read SoD but didn't put that together.

    That would seem to increase the odds of the Snarl story being up front as far as it was told. The only other non-lame option I could think of to explain it would be collusion among both good and evil gods of Stickworld against the Eastern Gods. Some sort of large conspiracy to tell a big lie, like Snarl Claus or something lol.
    "For you see, I theorize that the halfling does not possess a true sentient brain, like you or I, but rather a simple lump of nerve tissue that serves as a primitive "proto-brain" that can only process two emotional reactions to people: Hate or Lust."

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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    Quote Originally Posted by FlawedParadigm View Post
    I'd be perfectly pleased if you never responded to any of my posts or threads. I usually go out of my way to avoid you as is.
    It's easy enough to go to his profile and add him to your ignore list. Much easier than convincing someone to never reply to you, at any rate.
    I'm rather inconsistent. But I'm consistent in my inconsistency!
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    HalflingRangerGuy

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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    Quote Originally Posted by chessdudeguy View Post
    It's easy enough to go to his profile and add him to your ignore list. Much easier than convincing someone to never reply to you, at any rate.
    That doesn't keep him out of my threads, though. Hopefully a polite request will, so that everyone else can share their pet theories about what's within without being nitpicked by someone unwilling to contribute.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Messenger View Post
    I really would rather Tarquin finally just went all George R. R. Martin on Nale.
    That's right - George R. R. Martin; a writer so ruthless, his name is a verb akin to Samuel L. Jackson. Valar morghulis.

    Quote Originally Posted by The Giant View Post
    The only thing worse than the usual irrelevant rules pedantry is incorrect irrelevant rules pedantry.

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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    Quote Originally Posted by FlawedParadigm View Post
    That doesn't keep him out of my threads, though. Hopefully a polite request will, so that everyone else can share their pet theories about what's within without being nitpicked by someone unwilling to contribute.
    A pet theory that is not nitpicked [and/or outright hit with sludge hammers] is a piece of junk. Pretending it is actually sensible may be good for the ego of the one proposing it, but it does not get us to the truth, or even close to it.

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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    And woosh.


    OP - It may be a stupid hypothesis, but it's an entertaining one. I think it's the mai tais that give it its strength.
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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    It could be VERY wrong, but it's not stupid at all. If we've been misled about the nature of the rifts, it's a very deep conspiracy.

    In line with this suggestion, maybe Hades reached out and clawed up some mortals so that they'd have motivation to seal up the rifts and let the retired gods enjoy their privacy. Miju and Kraagor's death have such consequences it's hard to write them off as a simple lie.

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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    Quote Originally Posted by exenia View Post
    It could be VERY wrong, but it's not stupid at all. If we've been misled about the nature of the rifts, it's a very deep conspiracy.

    In line with this suggestion, maybe Hades reached out and clawed up some mortals so that they'd have motivation to seal up the rifts and let the retired gods enjoy their privacy. Miju and Kraagor's death have such consequences it's hard to write them off as a simple lie.
    Well, that someone was misled at some point is something which even Belkar has cottoned to. The manner or capacity of that or those misdirection(s) is what I'm speculating on. I mean your idea is about as probable as mine, so far as specifics go.

    If I were to take up a more scientific view - which is not my true object, which was, as stated, to be purely for fun - then all I can attest to is that we were led to believe that the Snarl would be a deity-killing monstrosity and the only thing worth mentioning inside of these rifts.

    That is all.

    What we have since learned is that, if nothing else, the Snarl is not the only thing inside the rifts. We know there is some kind of world in there - although without any proof of life thus far - it could well be that the Snarl "became" a world in some fashion. Unlikely, perhaps, but at this stage anything is possible. I might wonder vaguely if there is some connection between the fact that where, in the main world, lies a desert, there lies some great body of water in RiftWorld. That may mean something or nothing.

    If I were to hold to anything in my original statement being likely, it's that there's something in the nature of the RiftWorld that Girard had reason to believe Soon might risk his honour for. It would explain beyond simple alignment differences why he might so poorly misjudge Soon's character and/or moties. Hence my idea that there had to be something good, nice, or pleasant about the RiftWorld which Soon's Paladin nature might consider it dishonourable to conceal from either confederates or the world at large.

    There is supposition that Serini is still alive, although this is based largely on the simple idea that we have no proof that she is dead. I suggested that Girard was still alive only half-seriously. It's a world of magic, so it's possible, and high power spellcasters are notorious for extending their lifespans in a multitude of ways. We already know Girard led a life of misdirection and illusion, so it is not entirely unreasonable to suspect that he might fake his own death for any number of reasons.

    But hey, at our current amount of information it's equally likely that the Snarl is composed entirely of highly toxic raspberry jam, possibly lethal even to deities, and The Dark One's plan may amount to threatening to sugar gods to death. *Shrugs.*

    Anyhow, I'm done defending my silly conjecture whether Mr. Argall likes it or not. Feel free to provide other ideas, so long as you don't mind the apparently unavoidable presence of Mr. Stop Having Fun.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Messenger View Post
    I really would rather Tarquin finally just went all George R. R. Martin on Nale.
    That's right - George R. R. Martin; a writer so ruthless, his name is a verb akin to Samuel L. Jackson. Valar morghulis.

    Quote Originally Posted by The Giant View Post
    The only thing worse than the usual irrelevant rules pedantry is incorrect irrelevant rules pedantry.

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    DwarfBarbarianGuy

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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    Quote Originally Posted by FlawedParadigm View Post
    For one, I'm fairly certain the chances of anything in the original post being more than vaguely correct are abysmal. Which is why I titled the thread as I did.
    I still don't think your hypothosis is any stupider than the planet being the snarl smiling at people and tempting them into crossing.

    And that's largely based on the idea that I don't want the nice chaotic leader of a nation that brutally murdered goblins to have done that for no damned good reason.
    Last edited by F.Harr; 2013-07-16 at 02:55 PM.
    http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showt...6#post15476516


    I know I'm stealing this from someone else. But it's SO FUNNY

    Zweisteine quoting Razanir:

    "I am a human sixtyfourthling! Fear my minimal halfling ancestry!"

    From: Razanir

    Bagnold could be one sixty-fourth halfling.

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    Default Re: Stupidest hypothesis ever

    Quote Originally Posted by F.Harr View Post
    I still don't think your hypothosis is any stupider than the planet being the snarl smiling at people and tempting them into crossing.

    And that's largely based on the idea that I don't want the nice chaotic leader of a nation that brutally murdered goblins to have done that for no damned good reason.
    Well, we have good reason to believe that Shojo is more of a trickster than was ever previously apparent. It could also explain by Belkar seems to be the second one catching on, in that he personally - uh...ghostally? visionally? - instructed Belkar in the finer points of being a manipulative bastard. He may or may not have made a clean breast of everything he knew when info dumping the plot on the Order. It's possible that he shared everything as he knew it, whether or not what he knew was entirely factual, or it's equally probable he altered some details, left things out, or embellished things for any number of reasons.

    He was outed as a liar not long after his introduction - so it's a question of whether Chaos or Good meant more to him. I like to think he was more the latter than the former, but really one could make an argument either way at the present point.
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    I really would rather Tarquin finally just went all George R. R. Martin on Nale.
    That's right - George R. R. Martin; a writer so ruthless, his name is a verb akin to Samuel L. Jackson. Valar morghulis.

    Quote Originally Posted by The Giant View Post
    The only thing worse than the usual irrelevant rules pedantry is incorrect irrelevant rules pedantry.

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