LGBTAIitp # 49: Please check all baggage before boarding the Rainbow Rail Road

[TaiLiu]

I have temporarily returned! What news from this realm?

[Arkhosia]

I have temporarily returned! What news from this realm?

I am definitely trans!
Mom says she's getting fake boobs before me though.

[golentan]

I have temporarily returned! What news from this realm?

I'm going through existential doubt about my sexuality and relationships again.

[Selpharia]

I am definitely trans!
Mom says she's getting fake boobs before me though.

That's super cute! Your mom sounds awesme, Ark.

I would appreciate it. This miiiiight end up being up becoming a fairly large battle

Zinnia Jones has this article on the subject, and if you're in the mood for something more scholarly, here is the study she references on increased stress levels for trans people due to this issue.

[Arkhosia]

That's super cute! Your mom sounds awesme, Ark.



Zinnia Jones has this article on the subject, and if you're in the mood for something more scholarly, here is the study she references on increased stress levels for trans people due to this issue.

She is.
Anyone know of Transgendered support groups in Massachusetts?

[TaiLiu]

I am definitely trans!
Mom says she's getting fake boobs before me though.

Oh, nice! What confirmed it?

I'm going through existential doubt about my sexuality and relationships again.

I'm sorry to hear that. I'd ask if you want to talk about it, but I'm imagining that you've spoken about it in previous posts.

Digital hug?

[Coidzor]

She is.
Anyone know of Transgendered support groups in Massachusetts?

I know they definitely exist. Especially in and around Boston, because it's Boston, it's a major city, and it's Boston.

Google keeps making noises about PFLAG starting in the vicinity of Boston, which is probably of interest to at least your parents if not yourself. Boston Area Trans Support (BATS) keeps getting mentioned as well.

[golentan]

Oh, nice! What confirmed it?

I'm sorry to hear that. I'd ask if you want to talk about it, but I'm imagining that you've spoken about it in previous posts.

Digital hug?

Hug. It's pretty simple. I have feelings for two people. One of them is demisexual, and I'm pretty sure I'll never be on her dance card. The other is cute and sweet, and I have a little freakout every time I think about asking him out because my feelings about men are really complicated, at least when I'm looking at them romantically rather than just sexually.

I just make it way bigger and more complex in my mind. I'm really good at blowing things out of proportion.

[EvilRoeSlade]

Hi guys and gals.

[Arkhosia]

Hi guys and gals.

Hello!

[SiuiS]

One of the good things is that the uterus isn't really useful except during pregnancies. So people who aren't planning on getting pregnant - like women past menopause - can donate it without really risking much (there is a risk, but it's not huge).

The sad news is that I don't expect trans women to be on the list for transplants soon. It will happen - I don't doubt that - but even if the clinical trials go off without a hitch, don't expect a womb transplant for some time. I don't know how long.

Wait. Wouldn't a transplant after menopause be a waste of surgical procedure?

I realize I may regret this, but what is a thrysus?

A staff topped with a stylized pine cone or acorn as part of the ritual paraphernalia of (I believe) a Dionysian mystery cult.

Yeah, is that a Mage reference? =.=

Yup!

And of course a hundred years is a long time! That's just shy of half the age of our nation!

I actually had to recalibrste that. All that fantasy literature in my youth, never had a clear idea of time scale.

And for the English people, it's the same way in the North East of the US. A half hour drive is an all day affair, whereas a half hour drive is about the limit I'm willing to push for commute time to work.

It is really interesting listening to people talk about their perspective on distance, time, near/far, and the like. It really is a very binary debate. Either 100 miles isn't all that far, or it's a weekend trip.

Would explain why Jade always drives at a bajillionty miles an hour, then. She's gotta go fast to cover all those states over there she can!

Though my hypothesis is it's cold. A mile is a lot longer when you're freezing.

Spoiler: Transphobia Discussion

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She wouldn't have even had to interact with living, breathing trans* people. Or even non-trans* people who know a lick about trans* people and trans* issues and concerns.

It's a matter of historical record that there have been trans women who died as the result of complications arising from uterine transplants.

So yeah.

My current understanding is that they've only recently begun to look into uterine transplants again after stopping in the 1970s because in vitro fertilization became a thing, and, IIRC, the trans women who received uterine transplants invariably rejected them and had nasty complications back in the dark ages of the early 20th century.

Anyone recall how things are going with that or with more clarity? I'm sure I've misremembered something there.

Huh. That's actually news to me.

165 miles, apparently. SiuiS beat me to the witty truism though.

Aye, 265.4 km is a ways.

Hmm. What's the clearance level needed to read brown text? As it's not on the standard spectrum I suspect it's probably Ultra-Violet only. Kindly report to the nearest self-termination booth. Have a nice day! Happiness is mandatory.

So you're saying the safest character is the one who is truly colorblind?

When I was growing up, the nearest city was 30 minutes away. It was a day trip to go there.

Then I moved to the DC area, and my commute 1 way was an hour. (I didn't drive an hour. I used mass transit the whole way. But it was still a 2 hour round trip, every day.)

My current commute is 30 minutes one way, and I do drive it.

As a wee'n, I used to collect bottles and cans, and exchange them at the recycling center. When I got a dollar, I would go down to Burger King and buy a whopper, because they were 99¢, and then play in their jungle gym for a few hours before heading home.

My mom flipped out when I stayed an extra hour because it was a ten mile walk and she never knew I was out because I only left while she was at work? Yeah.

Hi guys and gals.

Hi there! Nice dramatic kick~!

[WarKitty]

So you're saying the safest character is the one who is truly colorblind?

Die mutant!

[EvilRoeSlade]

Thanks, Batmare is always ready to defend the innocent.

I'm just stopping in to introduce myself. Even though I've got that little venus sign on my profile, I was actually assigned male at birth, I just haven't been able to bring myself to change it to M<F because issues. I was actually introducing myself as female on the internet long before I came to terms with my need to transition.

Anyway I'm not there yet, the road is long and painful. Don't know any queers in RL, I plan to change that but I'm shy and socially awkward so I don't know how it will go. Until then I'm just poking my head into little nooks like this to meet other people.

[golentan]

Thanks, Batmare is always ready to defend the innocent.

I'm just stopping in to introduce myself. Even though I've got that little venus sign on my profile, I was actually assigned male at birth, I just haven't been able to bring myself to change it to M<F because issues. I was actually introducing myself as female on the internet long before I came to terms with my need to transition.

Anyway I'm not there yet, the road is long and painful. Don't know any queers in RL, I plan to change that but I'm shy and socially awkward so I don't know how it will go. Until then I'm just poking my head into little nooks like this to meet other people.

Well, this is a pretty awesome community to get support and help in, I'm sure you'll fit in just fine. They haven't even kicked me out yet!

[Karen Lynn]

Says the professional truck driver :P

Right... Speaking as a trucker, and not as a person who's driven two hundred forty-three miles for a burger from a particular restaurant...

I have temporarily returned! What news from this realm?

Well, I'm no longer in self imposed exile from the thread, I'm on hormones for 13 days now, and.... *other people speak here*

[golentan]

So I got kicked pretty hard in the feels.

Spoiler: Trigger Warning: Child Abuse

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Someone just linked me to a comic about a guy who was abused as a child and was worried about himself becoming an abuser. It had a good ending, but it hit me pretty hard. A lot, okay, pretty much all of my sexuality baggage is tied up around being abused as a child myself, and I really like kids. The idea of anyone taking a child's innocence, or hurting them, is one of my berserk buttons and at the top of a very short list of things that can provoke me to physical violence. But the whole "victim becomes the offender thing" is so prevalent, I've got a lot of angst about whether I'd be tempted to do that myself. I know I'd never do it, but it's still a source of doubt, so seeing someone else wrestling with the same fear knocked me right in my weak point. Even though it ended pointing out that that stereotype is false, it poked at one of my wounds.

[Eldest]

So I got kicked pretty hard in the feels.

Spoiler: Trigger Warning: Child Abuse

Show

Someone just linked me to a comic about a guy who was abused as a child and was worried about himself becoming an abuser. It had a good ending, but it hit me pretty hard. A lot, okay, pretty much all of my sexuality baggage is tied up around being abused as a child myself, and I really like kids. The idea of anyone taking a child's innocence, or hurting them, is one of my berserk buttons and at the top of a very short list of things that can provoke me to physical violence. But the whole "victim becomes the offender thing" is so prevalent, I've got a lot of angst about whether I'd be tempted to do that myself. I know I'd never do it, but it's still a source of doubt, so seeing someone else wrestling with the same fear knocked me right in my weak point. Even though it ended pointing out that that stereotype is false, it poked at one of my wounds.

Spoiler

Show

A large percentage (90%?) of people who abuse were abused.
20%(?) of people who were abused go on to abuse. Sadly, I don't recall the exact numbers. But you should be fine.

[Lentrax]

Right... Speaking as a trucker, and not as a person who's driven two hundred forty-three miles for a burger from a particular restaurant...

So, you have to drive a really long way for White Castle too?

Well, I'm no longer in self imposed exile from the thread, I'm on hormones for 13 days now, and.... *other people speak here*

I have decided to start the transition to full time. And that's really all I have.

[Astrella]

So I got kicked pretty hard in the feels.

Spoiler: Trigger Warning: Child Abuse

Show

Someone just linked me to a comic about a guy who was abused as a child and was worried about himself becoming an abuser. It had a good ending, but it hit me pretty hard. A lot, okay, pretty much all of my sexuality baggage is tied up around being abused as a child myself, and I really like kids. The idea of anyone taking a child's innocence, or hurting them, is one of my berserk buttons and at the top of a very short list of things that can provoke me to physical violence. But the whole "victim becomes the offender thing" is so prevalent, I've got a lot of angst about whether I'd be tempted to do that myself. I know I'd never do it, but it's still a source of doubt, so seeing someone else wrestling with the same fear knocked me right in my weak point. Even though it ended pointing out that that stereotype is false, it poked at one of my wounds.

*hugs tight* I haven't gone through something as bad as you, but I'm still afraid I'll repeat the same patterns as my parents.

I have decided to start the transition to full time. And that's really all I have.

*hugs tight* Lots of luck.

[SiuiS]

Thanks, Batmare is always ready to defend the innocent.

I'm just stopping in to introduce myself. Even though I've got that little venus sign on my profile, I was actually assigned male at birth, I just haven't been able to bring myself to change it to M<F because issues. I was actually introducing myself as female on the internet long before I came to terms with my need to transition.

Anyway I'm not there yet, the road is long and painful. Don't know any queers in RL, I plan to change that but I'm shy and socially awkward so I don't know how it will go. Until then I'm just poking my head into little nooks like this to meet other people.

Don't fret none about the icon! It's there to be inclusive, but not prescriptive. You aren't required to even use one let alone use a specific one with certain accuracy requirments :3

And yeah. Long. Painful. Rewarding. That's how it goes...

Spoiler

Show

A large percentage (90%?) of people who abuse were abused.
20%(?) of people who were abused go on to abuse. Sadly, I don't recall the exact numbers. But you should be fine.

That took me a while. I was sure they were contradictory, but when it clicked, it clicked.

[Serpentine]

Are dust storms common during the wedding season in Australia?

More common than you'd think.

I did a study abroad in London summer of 1998. Since I was there, I took the chance to play tourist a lot. When I toured the Tower of London, the tour guide said (about the White Tower, I think) "this is the newest tower. It is only 300 years old."

I couldn't help but think "Only 300 years old. It's older than my country, and it's only 300 years old."

When I was there I played the "Spot the Things Older Than My Country Game". The best thing was a book in a pub that was published around the time of Australia's Federation.

[Asta Kask]

Wait. Wouldn't a transplant after menopause be a waste of surgical procedure?

As donors. The tissue is still perfectly fine (there have been women past menopause who have received IVF), and most women past menopause don't plan to use their uterus anyway.

More common than you'd think.

Reminds me of this.

[SiuiS]

As donors. The tissue is still perfectly fine (there have been women past menopause who have received IVF), and most women past menopause don't plan to use their uterus anyway.]

That makes sense. For some reason I thought "ovary" instead of "uterus".

[Asta Kask]

Ovaries would be nice, although I'm not sure how they would interact with testosterone-raised brain... Note, however, that the cis-women who received uterus transplants didn't have them hooked up to the ovaries (it's very fiddly), so they'd still have to get IVF. I don't know if they can give birth vaginally, but planned caesareans are really no danger anymore. I appreciate that some trans women would like to give birth vaginally for psychological reasons, though.

ETA: On the LGBTAI ship, do we go to Rainbow Alert?

[SiuiS]

Ovaries would be nice, although I'm not sure how they would interact with testosterone-raised brain... Note, however, that the cis-women who received uterus transplants didn't have them hooked up to the ovaries (it's very fiddly), so they'd still have to get IVF. I don't know if they can give birth vaginally, but planned caesareans are really no danger anymore. I appreciate that some trans women would like to give birth vaginally for psychological reasons, though.

Yeah, that was a clear instance of me not actually thinking.

As for vagunal birth (that's... Honestly how you think that is spelled iPhone?), I am uncertain. Apparently the uterus is a vital structural component of the female torso, yet nothing I have ever read even comes close to suggesting this. Male bias in medical science?

ETA: On the LGBTAI ship, do we go to Rainbow Alert?

Only if you're absolutely sure sir. It does require changing the bulb.

[Kesnit]

As for vagunal birth (that's... Honestly how you think that is spelled iPhone?), I am uncertain. Apparently the uterus is a vital structural component of the female torso, yet nothing I have ever read even comes close to suggesting this. Male bias in medical science?

If it was necessary, how do women who have had hystos keep their torsos from collapsing?

[SiuiS]

The same way your teeth are necessary to structure your mouth but you can live with one pair of molars, really. Things move around. The uterus is so inter aliased with everything else though, that it's a marvel to think of how a transplant would work.

It's a can of worms! You can grow a body with a uterus in, you can take a uterus out, but I'll be darned if it's as easy to put one in where it wasn't before...

[Asta Kask]

When there's no fetus around, the uterus is about 3" by 2" by 2".

ETA: Many of the trial patients are cis women who were born without a uterus. As the uterus grows with pregnancy, other organs just... move out of the way. And it's a not uncommon experience that when the woman sits up after delivery she feels her organs... fall back into their right places.

Ask Braz after the delivery.

[SiuiS]

When there's no fetus around, the uterus is about 3" by 2" by 2".

I wanna point out that the stance you are arguing against is 'women are cans of worms'. If it was a serious argument, you could have just pointed out discrepancies in the average tin and nickel amounts.

[noparlpf]

When there's no fetus around, the uterus is about 3" by 2" by 2".

ETA: Many of the trial patients are cis women who were born without a uterus. As the uterus grows with pregnancy, other organs just... move out of the way. And it's a not uncommon experience that when the woman sits up after delivery she feels her organs... fall back into their right places.

That sounds like a super gross feeling.