Can you swing a pig weighing your max load?

[Immabozo]

So the Dragon Mag that brings us such fun as Chicken infested, also brings us the feat that gives you a pig equal to your maximum load. Is there some class that can take advantage of and then swing this horrendously heavy pig? Cause with all manner of strength enhancing shenanigangs, getting hit by this pig could do some damage!

So can it be done?

[ahenobarbi]

Hulking Hurler prestige class (Complete Warrior) lets you throw anything that weights up to your medium load. I don't remember anything that would let you throw maximum load.

[Curmudgeon]

It takes your maximum exertion to simply lift that load, so there's nothing left for swinging and throwing.

[LibraryOgre]

It takes your maximum exertion to simply lift that load, so there's nothing left for swinging and throwing.

What about dropping?

"My maximum load allows me to lift planets. Here is the Moon of Pork!"

[Metahuman1]

An ability to get airborn (Riding a mount or a spell or something.) would let you pick it up, carry it till it generates 20d6 falling damage to itself and what ever it lands on, and then add damage based on weight. Pump str, and that's a LOT of weight.

Bombs away.

[Curmudgeon]

In D&D, all bombs can be avoided with DC 15 Reflex saves, so that's not a particularly effective tactic.

[Bugworlds]

If using it as an anvil, for dropping of course, isn't going to work, I'm thinking some training is in need. Get some spiked armor on that beast. Teach it to overrun. Turn it into a substitute for the open lock skill.

[Immabozo]

It takes your maximum exertion to simply lift that load, so there's nothing left for swinging and throwing.

We dont want to throw it, cause then it will turn into Orcus and skin you alive.

Although that might be funny to mind switch the BBEG and then he's screwed

[Flickerdart]

The solution is remarkably simple.

Consider: We have a pig, which increases indefinitely in weight. We also have a hapless peasant doomed to carry that pig. The peasant can do nothing to change the weight category of the pig, because as soon as he bulks up, so does the pig. Let us assume that this commoner is infected with Festering Anger and has also managed to become immune to the Constitution damage. So he has NI strength.

Preparation: We produce a second commoner, and apply to him the same conditions as the first commoner. Then we add a small additional boon to Strength - the difference between Medium and Maximum load is only ~4 Strength, so we can easily make up the difference. We'll want to jack it up a little higher though because...

Solution: The second commoner bodily picks up the first commoner (who is carrying the NI-heavy pig) and flings him at things pig-first.

[Immabozo]

The solution is remarkably simple.

Consider: We have a pig, which increases indefinitely in weight. We also have a hapless peasant doomed to carry that pig. The peasant can do nothing to change the weight category of the pig, because as soon as he bulks up, so does the pig. Let us assume that this commoner is infected with Festering Anger and has also managed to become immune to the Constitution damage. So he has NI strength.

Preparation: We produce a second commoner, and apply to him the same conditions as the first commoner. Then we add a small additional boon to Strength - the difference between Medium and Maximum load is only ~4 Strength, so we can easily make up the difference. We'll want to jack it up a little higher though because...

Solution: The second commoner bodily picks up the first commoner (who is carrying the NI-heavy pig) and flings him at things pig-first.

Flickerdart, you are my hero. I am so happy right now.

[Vogonjeltz]

The solution is remarkably simple.

Consider: We have a pig, which increases indefinitely in weight. We also have a hapless peasant doomed to carry that pig. The peasant can do nothing to change the weight category of the pig, because as soon as he bulks up, so does the pig. Let us assume that this commoner is infected with Festering Anger and has also managed to become immune to the Constitution damage. So he has NI strength.

Preparation: We produce a second commoner, and apply to him the same conditions as the first commoner. Then we add a small additional boon to Strength - the difference between Medium and Maximum load is only ~4 Strength, so we can easily make up the difference. We'll want to jack it up a little higher though because...

Solution: The second commoner bodily picks up the first commoner (who is carrying the NI-heavy pig) and flings him at things pig-first.

The commoner doing the throwing would need enough strength to lift both the pig and the commoner holding said pig. Is +4 enough?

[Flickerdart]

The commoner doing the throwing would need enough strength to lift both the pig and the commoner holding said pig. Is +4 enough?

You'd need a little more than +4. If you look at the Carrying Capacity table, 933 lbs is the heaviest listed medium carry capacity ( can't be arsed to extrapolate the table), achievable with STR 29. If we shave off 175 lbs off that (the weight of an average adult human in 3.5 - apparently those peasants are packing a few extra pounds) that leaves us with 758 lbs worth of pig. The maximum load that's closest without going over is 700 lbs at STR 24, so we need a gap of +5 (conveniently, a single Tome).

The largest boar in history was 2,552lbs. We would need quite a mighty commoner to lift it, indeed.

[Vogonjeltz]

You'd need a little more than +4. If you look at the Carrying Capacity table, 933 lbs is the heaviest listed medium carry capacity ( can't be arsed to extrapolate the table), achievable with STR 29. If we shave off 175 lbs off that (the weight of an average adult human in 3.5 - apparently those peasants are packing a few extra pounds) that leaves us with 758 lbs worth of pig. The maximum load that's closest without going over is 700 lbs at STR 24, so we need a gap of +5 (conveniently, a single Tome).

The largest boar in history was 2,552lbs. We would need quite a mighty commoner to lift it, indeed.

I approve of this plan.

Instead of a commoner wielding the pig carrier, I would say how about a drunken master who can wield them as an improvised weapon?

[Immabozo]

You'd need a little more than +4. If you look at the Carrying Capacity table, 933 lbs is the heaviest listed medium carry capacity ( can't be arsed to extrapolate the table), achievable with STR 29. If we shave off 175 lbs off that (the weight of an average adult human in 3.5 - apparently those peasants are packing a few extra pounds) that leaves us with 758 lbs worth of pig. The maximum load that's closest without going over is 700 lbs at STR 24, so we need a gap of +5 (conveniently, a single Tome).

The largest boar in history was 2,552lbs. We would need quite a mighty commoner to lift it, indeed.

This is a great mook to throw against your party, haha

[Flickerdart]

I approve of this plan.

Instead of a commoner wielding the pig carrier, I would say how about a drunken master who can wield them as an improvised weapon?

Unfortunately, the drunken master doesn't gain any benefits from wielding an especially large or heavy improvised weapon. Also, technically the commoner is not an object, and so isn't eligible to be an improvised weapon. The pig might be though, as nothing in the flaw states that it needs to be alive.

[Immabozo]

Unfortunately, the drunken master doesn't gain any benefits from wielding an especially large or heavy improvised weapon. Also, technically the commoner is not an object, and so isn't eligible to be an improvised weapon. The pig might be though, as nothing in the flaw states that it needs to be alive.

Could we pick up the pig and throw it and have it twist so it - not the commoner - hits the target? Maybe homebrew a version of Exotic Weapon Proficiency for it?

[Eldest]

Unfortunately, the drunken master doesn't gain any benefits from wielding an especially large or heavy improvised weapon. Also, technically the commoner is not an object, and so isn't eligible to be an improvised weapon. The pig might be though, as nothing in the flaw states that it needs to be alive.

Would this, then, allow for infinite bacon?

[Hangwind]

Would this, then, allow for infinite bacon?

Infinite Bacon...Infinite Chickens...Now we need a source of Infinite barbeque sauce!

[Svata]

Would this, then, allow for infinite bacon?

Not exactly. NI, sure, but truly infinite is impossible because reasons that I am not articulate enough to give. Sorry.

[Immabozo]

Not exactly. NI, sure, but truly infinite is impossible because reasons that I am not articulate enough to give. Sorry.

Infinite anything is impossible, everything has a limit. But not in an abstract universe like D&D! Infinite here we come!

[Flickerdart]

Could we pick up the pig and throw it and have it twist so it - not the commoner - hits the target? Maybe homebrew a version of Exotic Weapon Proficiency for it?

That's a good point. Nothing in the rules says that objects you use as improvised weapons can't have screaming commoners strapped to them.

[Vhaidara]

How has this avoided infamy on the internet? It's as bad/funny as chicken infested.

[Immabozo]

That's a good point. Nothing in the rules says that objects you use as improvised weapons can't have screaming commoners strapped to them.

can I sig this? It is absolutely glorious.

[Immabozo]

How has this avoided infamy on the internet? It's as bad/funny as chicken infested.

I agree, this thread has turned into amazing!

[GutterFace]

Throw some Cancer Mage on with Festering Anger towards your pig. NI Str for pig swinging and hilarious flavor fun

[Flickerdart]

can I sig this? It is absolutely glorious.

Feel free.

[Immabozo]

Throw some Cancer Mage on with Festering Anger towards your pig. NI Str for pig swinging and hilarious flavor fun

I never caught that the cancer mage is immune to the disease's effects. This is glorious!

So a Drunken Master with leadership attracts a follower 1 commoner/x Caner Mage with the Pig Bond feat. With some strength shenanigans, the pig can do NI damage per hit. I love it!

[Naanomi]

This has actual value, since the pig doesn't ever increase in actual size category (or so it seems); and thus once suitably preserved (Quintessence?) makes the ultimate solution to the 'where does the hulking hurler find the adamantine planetoid' problem

[Immabozo]

This has actual value, since the pig doesn't ever increase in actual size category (or so it seems); and thus once suitably preserved (Quintessence?) makes the ultimate solution to the 'where does the hulking hurler find the adamantine planetoid' problem

I think quintessence would stop it from turning into Orcus and killing you, right? Because "ever" implies time, right? If it is never in the time stream, it doesn't qualify!

[Flickerdart]

Questionable. However, if you got enough quintessence to cover Orcus, then once the pig transformed it would remain covered, so you now have Orcus right where you want him.