(Social, fem) "The Princess's hand for.. wait, that won't work.."

[Sith_Happens]

Go right ahead. I'd have a blanket permission to sig me in my own sig if it weren't for the fact that it'd be kinda narcissistic.

*Takes you at your word.*

[Chd]

This makes me incredibly uncomfortable in multiple ways, so congratulations on playing a convincing evil character.

Cheers for the encouragement! S/He was the token Evil Team-mate, and the DM and I just chucked in the 'reveal' at the last moment, making a huge 'WTF?' moment for the other players.

It was foreshadowed ahead of time with dialogue such as "You assume too much..." when a player was trying to cold-read my character, but the idea to remove a ring from the finger was last-minute.

The King was understandably upset, but when a Dark/Anti-Paladin can conjure his Unholy Rune-Encrusted Sword/Shield/Armor, it isn't a good idea to confront him directly.

[SiuiS]

Actually all the other notable cursed items are int third, it's only the belt of gender benders that isnt

Like I said; footnote. They exist, they are glossed over, they are often forgotten. Most "cursed items" are just interesting and different regular items such as dust of sneezing and choking.

... Well there's no real need to completely overhaul the whole body and waste disposal still needs to be performed.

Do they? I thought they susbsisted on psychic energy?

Need some way to have creepy Illithid r34, after all.

The head of an ilithid is all you need for ilithid porn, really. They have tentacles and ears.

Everything else is just a tripod/like structure for positioning the porny parts XD

Presumably they inherit the plumbing of their host body. I doubt the illithids themselves consider physical gender to be of any real relevance, so they'd still have a biological sex while being socially/psychologically asexual.

asexual just means not interested in getting it on, though. And I'm sure they have a personality trend that's relatable to ended, they just don't have the same benchmarks that make them assign these trends to physical sex.

GitP, the only site where historical plausibility of gay marriage, feudal politics, and futanari Drow getting it on with cuttlefish can meet in a single thread.

Have you been to 4chan?

[Erik Vale]

Do they? I thought they susbsisted on psychic energy?

Nope, they eat brains. At minimum 1 human equivilent/month.

[russdm]

At minimum 1 human equivilent/month.

No, they don't. They have octopus mouths hidden in the tentacles like Gricks or the flying brain with tentacles or whatever it is called. Grick/Grell? There is no reason to have a human mouth.

[The Glyphstone]

No, they don't. They have octopus mouths hidden in the tentacles like Gricks or the flying brain with tentacles or whatever it is called. Grick/Grell? There is no reason to have a human mouth.

Not sure if this is a joke or you just misread the previous post.

[toapat]

No, they don't. They have octopus mouths hidden in the tentacles like Gricks or the flying brain with tentacles or whatever it is called. Grick/Grell? There is no reason to have a human mouth.

lookup Illithid Beefcake.

Actual art commissioned by Wizards where we can see an Illithid mouth. They do have teeth, not a beak

[TheThan]

So what happens when the dragon hears of the reward and returns with the princess in tow looking for the reward.

which actually brings up the question of why dragons steal princesses anyway.

[toapat]

So what happens when the dragon hears of the reward and returns with the princess in tow looking for the reward.

it gets employed as a foundry machine inbetween being king. except for White and Silver (who get employed by the Butcher shops), all the core true dragons have some sort of breath weapon that can be used in ore refining.

The princess becomes a half dragon factory for the royal line.

[Chd]

So what happens when the dragon hears of the reward and returns with the princess in tow looking for the reward.

which actually brings up the question of why dragons steal princesses anyway.

Spoiler: Theory

Show

Crypto-zoologists theorize that Dragons ate limestone (CaCO3) so that they can fly (HCl + CaCO3 = CO2 + CaCl2 + H2 + O2). Hydrogen Gas is lighter then air, allowing dragons to fly, but the corrosive effects meant that it needed to be vented (hence the fire-breathing).

When a Dragon Died, if the bones weren't washed, they disintegrate due to the high alkalinity. (The theory goes that they were a species related to crocodiles with every second rib sticking out to the side to create a 'fan' wing.)

Still, if dragons were as smart as they are in legends then the princess was taken as a hostage to ensure they weren't shot at, as well as an eventual meal.

I'd make the fantasy version a magic shape-shifter, and the princess be wanted for the same reason the party wants her: to bear their children.

[SiuiS]

lookup Illithid Beefcake.

Actual art commissioned by Wizards where we can see an Illithid mouth. They do have teeth, not a beak

RP section, not 3.5 section. Wizards of the Coast is not the end-all be-all of mind flayers.

it gets employed as a foundry machine inbetween being king. except for White and Silver (who get employed by the Butcher shops), all the core true dragons have some sort of breath weapon that can be used in ore refining.

The princess becomes a half dragon factory for the royal line.

Wow, that's terrible.

[Coidzor]

RP section, not 3.5 section. Wizards of the Coast is not the end-all be-all of mind flayers.

Wow, that's terrible.

No, but they do currently own the definitive voice on 'em if I recall correctly.

Yep. But efficient.

[Frozen_Feet]

which actually brings up the question of why dragons steal princesses anyway.

In most of folklore I know, the dragon didn't exactly steal the princess. Either it was just kind of hanging around, and people were offering human sacrifices to it out of fear, or it was given to the princess as a pet when small, and then it became... not small. Another variation has some evil person place a dragon to guard a princess.

As dragons overlapped heavily with demons/ the Devil in folklore, I can think of a few cases where a dragon seduces a woman... in order to have her birth the Anti-Christ.

[toapat]

Wow, that's terrible.

Right, Acid refinement is not for steel. But come on, dragons should at least be responsible enough to rule or help out their kingdom

Did we ever get an idea asto which Prime Material this hypothetical nation is on? In Krynn or Faerun i can see the royal family jumping at the opportunity for dragonblood. Not Eberron but thats mostly because the last time a half dragon was born a 400 year war broke out

[Storm_Of_Snow]

Right, Acid refinement is not for steel. But come on, dragons should at least be responsible enough to rule or help out their kingdom

The kind of ruling where the phrase "hostile takeover" is an understatement.

At best the good dragons might assist the state in the event of an invasion that also threatens them, with the understanding that they won't be bothered again unless it's really, really important.

[hamishspence]

In most of folklore I know, the dragon didn't exactly steal the princess. Either it was just kind of hanging around, and people were offering human sacrifices to it out of fear, or it was given to the princess as a pet when small, and then it became... not small. Another variation has some evil person place a dragon to guard a princess.

Modern fantasy often plays with these tropes. In Mercedes Lackey's Tales of the 500 Kingdoms (One Good Knight) the dragon is under a curse forcing it to ravage the kingdom (it does so as little as the curse will let it - damage rather than deaths) - and the princess and the dragon end up working together to defeat the causers of the cause.

In Patricia C. Wrede's Enchanted Forest Chronicles - the princess is tired of being expected to fill the standard expectations of a princess - so she runs away to the dragons, volunteering her services as a "dragon's princess".

[Segev]

Actually, as the owners of the Intellectual Property that is the Mind Flayer, WotC has exclusive right to use them in any professional capacity (outside of parody and other Fair Use), and thus is the definitive voice in what they are. Much as J.K. Rowling is for Harry Potter, and Paramount Studios is for Star Trek, and Disney is for Star Wars and Marvel Comics characters.

[thorgrim29]

Why wouldn't the adventurer (adventuress?) want one of the princes? At worst she gets power, respect, wealth, and someone to administer her land while she's out murderhoboing who's not ambitious enough to betray her and is presumably too scared of her to notice "his" kids don't look like him. At best they actually like eachother and have an effective partnership.

[S@tanicoaldo]

Make her the duchess and be done with it.

[SiuiS]

In most of folklore I know, the dragon didn't exactly steal the princess. Either it was just kind of hanging around, and people were offering human sacrifices to it out of fear, or it was given to the princess as a pet when small, and then it became... not small. Another variation has some evil person place a dragon to guard a princess.

As dragons overlapped heavily with demons/ the Devil in folklore, I can think of a few cases where a dragon seduces a woman... in order to have her birth the Anti-Christ.

Neat. Where would one go to find academic stuff on this?

Right, Acid refinement is not for steel. But come on, dragons should at least be responsible enough to rule or help out their kingdom

Did we ever get an idea asto which Prime Material this hypothetical nation is on? In Krynn or Faerun i can see the royal family jumping at the opportunity for dragonblood. Not Eberron but thats mostly because the last time a half dragon was born a 400 year war broke out

I was more concerned with the lack of consent on part of the princess before being turned into a broodmare for the good of the kingdom.

Actually, as the owners of the Intellectual Property that is the Mind Flayer, WotC has exclusive right to use them in any professional capacity (outside of parody and other Fair Use), and thus is the definitive voice in what they are. Much as J.K. Rowling is for Harry Potter, and Paramount Studios is for Star Trek, and Disney is for Star Wars and Marvel Comics characters.

No, because other authoritative works continue to exist in equal, let's call it 'canonicity', when specifically speaking in a forum where the one company's specific brand is not held as the base rubric.

[hamishspence]

No, because other authoritative works continue to exist in equal, let's call it 'canonicity', when specifically speaking in a forum where the one company's specific brand is not held as the base rubric.

Didn't the "Lamprey Mouth vs Beaked Mouth" variance occur as early as 2e - with one being more magical, and the other being more psionic?

[JusticeZero]

I'd presume that dragons get into conflicts with kings for the same reasons kings get in conflicts with other kings. Resources and territory. I'd assume there's just not enough ___ in the kingdom to keep the dragon and the king supplied, and the kingdom is looking to build up and needs the resources that te dragon wants for an equally justifiable reason. Dragons don't generally hold territory as strictly as humans do. Holding hostages is a reasonable way to hold control, though. "The Princess is comfortable in my lair, sipping fine wines. She will be fine, so long as you don't think about expanding your logging operations into Westmaarkh."

[Sith_Happens]

I was more concerned with the lack of consent on part of the princess before being turned into a broodmare for the good of the kingdom.

Welcome to how arranged marriages work. That's kind of exactly why they've been slowly going out of style around the world in real life.

[The Glyphstone]

Has anyone noticed the same thing I did, that this entire tangent about Mind Flayer mouthparts is based on a misread non-typo?

Nope, they eat brains. At minimum 1 human equivilent/month.

No, they don't. They have octopus mouths hidden in the tentacles like Gricks or the flying brain with tentacles or whatever it is called. Grick/Grell? There is no reason to have a human mouth.

[The Random NPC]

Has anyone noticed the same thing I did, that this entire tangent about Mind Flayer mouthparts is based on a misread non-typo?

I did!

Random words to fill the quota.

[Frozen_Feet]

Welcome to how arranged marriages work. That's kind of exactly why they've been slowly going out of style around the world in real life.

Not quite right. There have been multiple systems of arranged marriage, and in plenty of them the bride-to-be had a say. The actual objection to them had less to do with consent, and more to do with what were the reasons behind marriage. Starting with late medieval period and rise of chivalry but becoming popular in practice only within last 200 years in Europe and other "Western" countries, was the idea that marriage is primarily a romantic affair. In other words: that marriage should be about love, not economics, inheritance or any other thing arranged marriages typically were about.

In some countries (such as Japan) where arranged marriages were still a thing in recent history (or are still a thing), marrying out of love can be considered light-hearted, naive, irresponsible and even selfish. If you want to understand why, here's a paraphrased argument:

In one tradition, the family of the bride chooses candidates for husband from amongst those families they have a history with, based on how well-off they are financially, how well the two families have gotten along historically, how well-supported the potential children would be etc.

In the second tradition, the bride gets together with whomever because WUV.