[3.X] Worldview and Priesthood Composition if the Gods are Children

[Amphetryon]

Basically what it says on the tin. What would the general tenor of a world be, and how would you envision the various clerical orders, in a 3.X game where the gods are all children? I don't want to get too hung up on the edition, but I figured the fact that this is a 3.X game concept was worth noting.

Some specifics of the setting:

• This is an 'island world' without large continents, most islands being less than 150km at their widest point, generally spaced such that it's more than a day's travel between islands.
• For reasons that are unclear, no healing magics work on children under 2, including the unborn.
• The gods do not age, staying eternally between equivalent human ages of 4-10.

[avr]

I'd think many religious orders would spend a fair amount of time and energy trying to keep their gods distracted and happy. And isolated from outside influences of course.

Even if their minds are limited in some ways kids can definitely learn. Just how smart are these gods after a century?

If they're eternally as smart as they were when they ascended I don't expect most of the monarchs and religious leaders to hold much respect for their gods. It may take concentrated training for a high priest to hold worship and disrespect in their heads simultaneously but given sufficient motivation ...

Oh yeah, there will definitely be some smoking holes in the ground corresponding to invading armies and/or failed high priests.

[sktarq]

A few things. Try reading up on child psychology. This will be frightening for divinely powered ones. Not being able to tell reality from pretend could lead to "symbolic" sacrifices. Not having a strong sense understanding that toys break they could well send their priest off to war, or just pop their head off to see what's inside and as long as someone steps up to replace the dead priest not know they killed anyone. Short attention spans could leave an idea half completed - which could explain chimeras nicely. Gods loving, hating and then not caring about each other could cycle quickly and with little warning and could be problematic for those relying on say the rain for crops of the west winds to get their ship home. Also miracles would probably be big obvious and not necessarily what their followers need. Also 'adult' concepts like war, sex, wisdom, time, etc could be very messed up and possibly psychotic. Which could be fun.

[Amphetryon]

Thinking about this further, based in part on previous responses, what if we assume the following to be true:

The gods of this particular world are children. They are beings of immense power from a plane where time flows considerably differently than it does on this world, so that ten days of their time are a millennium on this world. This means that the inhabitants of the world would find it nearly impossible to perceive that their gods were aging at all, and they would instead perceive them as eternally children. The adult beings of their native plane have given the children dominion over this particular world (so 'ascended' is perhaps not the way to consider their divinity), in order to show them how people grow up and behave as adults.

[avr]

Responsible parents would check in with their kids every day at least. So once or twice a century as the locals see things. Insanely evil cults probably have difficulty lasting long term if they worship the true gods and not demons or something.

If the fastest you can react on reflex is ~0.4 second then a 1 day : 1 century ratio turns that into 2.5 hours. Your gods can't react faster than that. A standard action probably takes a bit under a day. A minute to think it over is about 16 days. If the god isn't watching or listening at that moment you might be best to create a work of art which will still catch their eye if they look by years from now rather than patiently praying.

None of that last paragraph is necessarily true if the gods can project avatars which interact with the world using local time.

[Perturbulent]

It seems to me that the clergy of such gods would be like bargaining parents in a super market. "please behave now, yes you can have the chocolate!" to avoid embarrassment, except instead of embarrassment they're bargaining for their town, country, family, etc. After all, it's not really possible to be appropriately firm with a god, and they hold supreme power. The priests would very nearly be hostages. Even with excessively careful and indulgent (I swear I'm not trying to allude to anything) priests, villages might routinely be wiped out, as the capricious anger of the child was upset that the Priest Klerger didn't remember exactly what the child said to Priest Polth, despite not having said it to Klerger. Children often have trouble separating their own knowledge from others, which might have strange consequences.