PC's with a talent for self-destruction

[Strigon]

I haven't seen such a thread here, but I thought it belonged.
This is a place for everyone to put their stories of characters who unknowingly went with the worst possible course of action. That could be the player who has a knack for finding people who are more powerful than they seem, or stumbling into every trap in a dungeon. Heck, they could just chug every unidentified potion they see.

For example, I have a half-orc barbarian in one of my games. And everywhere he goes, every trap I have ever laid down, he's walked right through it with glee. When I filled a room with obviously poisonous gas, he waltzed right in there to scout it out. I made him make three fortitude saves before he collapsed! He even decided the best time to rob an innocent man was just in front of a LG paladin NPC they were supposed to meet.
Surprisingly, this character has not died yet.

So, does anyone else have stories of players who just seem to find the option that gets them in the most trouble?

[Fayd]

I once condemned an entire subcontinent to centuries of destructive fae warring becuase I forgot that a monster was mearly knocked prone, not dead. It attacked me, I got killed later, BAM! Fae war.

[TheThan]

I don’t think I’ve told this story yet.
Some friends of mine (I wasn’t in the campaign, only heard the story) sunk a floating island. Here’s the story.
Using the bag of immoveable rods they had previously acquired, they built a ladder up to the island they saw floating in the sky. While suspended from immovable rods underneath the island they used the steam powered shovel they had to dig up through the bottom of the island into the city. Apparently the city was protected by some sort of impenetrable dome so they couldn’t get in the usual way.

Once inside they go about their business exploring the city; then night fell. What they didn’t know is that the city always lands in the ocean at night. They apparently made a fairly good sized hole because once the city landed, it immediately started flooding with sea water. Apparently nobody was able to plug the whole or lift off (I guess they had to wait until morning to do that).

I don’t recall the end of the tale, I think everyone drowned since they couldn’t escape the dome any other way, and it sunk from the weight of the sea water.

[Inevitability]

My players decided to plunder the 3rd-biggest city on the map. They even succeeded, mostly because they had insane luck. About twelve guards got a good look of their faces, though.

Then later on, the party had to cross a river. Problem: the only bridge is right there at the city they just commited arson, theft and murder. I expect them to build a raft, or maybe try to find someone who can help them out, but no.

THEY FREAKING GO TO THE CITY, RUN THROUGH IT ON HORSES, AND CROSS THE BRIDGE.

They even survived it. A few people got hit by crossbow bolts, but no one died.