Results 1 to 26 of 26
  1. - Top - End - #1
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Lheticus's Avatar

    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Anywhere but real life.
    Gender
    Male

    Default Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    I wanted to start a thread for joking riddles, so I did. No rules or order of posting here--post silly riddle questions or answer them in whatever order you want!

    For me, I just have this one to start us off:
    Tropers may find it pretty easy...

    What kind of band do characters in racing games like the most?
    It's not whether you win or lose...it's why you're playing in the first place.

  2. - Top - End - #2
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    PirateGuy

    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Location
    the gates of hell
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    .. i dono... a rock and "roll" band.



    Why do chemists relate Helium Curium and Berillium.
    -Them: You think THAT'S balanced!!!

    -Me: oh no... Quite the opposite :)

  3. - Top - End - #3
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Lheticus's Avatar

    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Anywhere but real life.
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    Quote Originally Posted by thatonesungod View Post
    .. i dono... a rock and "roll" band.



    Why do chemists relate Helium Curium and Berillium.
    Since you actually responded, I'll say the answer in honor of that:

    A RUBBER band. *ba dum tiss*
    It's not whether you win or lose...it's why you're playing in the first place.

  4. - Top - End - #4
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    IZ42's Avatar

    Join Date
    Nov 2014
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    Because if you can't helium of curium, you barium! (did you mean barium because that's the version I heard)
    Spoiler: Quotes!
    Show
    Quote Originally Posted by Elricaltovilla View Post
    I always thought understanding Scottish required a fort save vs. Alcohol poisoning.
    Quote Originally Posted by Twelve.five
    Hipsterdin- Smiting Heathens before it was cool.
    Quote Originally Posted by Elricaltovilla
    See, this wouldn't happen if you were a Zweihander Sentinel Warder with Silver Crane. You'd have a 60 ft. fly speed with good maneuverability, DR and glowing pants as early as level 8.

    Pink is Neutral Evil, because reasons.


    Exalted Monk Avatar by ThePrez1776

  5. - Top - End - #5
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Asta Kask's Avatar

    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    Gothenburg, Sweden
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    Q: Why did Dr. Facilier cross the road?

    Spoiler
    Show
    A: Hes got friends on the other side.
    Avatar by CoffeeIncluded

    Oooh, and that's a bad miss.

    “Don't exercise your freedom of speech until you have exercised your freedom of thought.”
    ― Tim Fargo

  6. - Top - End - #6
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    PirateGuy

    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Location
    the gates of hell
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    i did in fact mean barium, a misaimed brain gets in the way sometimes


    which pokemon would be the favorite of the ancient greeks

    i dont know so make up your own answer
    -Them: You think THAT'S balanced!!!

    -Me: oh no... Quite the opposite :)

  7. - Top - End - #7
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Lheticus's Avatar

    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Anywhere but real life.
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    Quote Originally Posted by thatonesungod View Post
    i did in fact mean barium, a misaimed brain gets in the way sometimes


    which pokemon would be the favorite of the ancient greeks

    i dont know so make up your own answer
    I...have no idea. This is really more of an intriguing than humorous question, anyone else have thoughts on this?

    Also: What is the name of the version of Google for birds?

    Spoiler: Answar
    Show
    Gaggle.
    It's not whether you win or lose...it's why you're playing in the first place.

  8. - Top - End - #8
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    PirateGuy

    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Location
    the gates of hell
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    have you heard about the wedding between the two antenna

    it was fine, but the Reception was Excellent (kappa)
    -Them: You think THAT'S balanced!!!

    -Me: oh no... Quite the opposite :)

  9. - Top - End - #9
    Troll in the Playground
     
    KuReshtin's Avatar

    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Largs, Scotland

    Default Re: Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    What do you call two crows sat on opposite sides of a tree, both too shy to talk to the other.

    Spoiler: Not as good without the picture...
    Show
    It was a failed attempted murder.
    Last edited by KuReshtin; 2015-01-15 at 09:41 AM.
    Quote Originally Posted by Archonic Energy
    Thanks KuReshtin, Chief Nerd-Hurder of the UKitP Clan.
    Quote Originally Posted by Teddy View Post
    KuReshtin too, because he's awesome and a Swede, and therefore double awesome.
    Stig-atar by Irbis.

  10. - Top - End - #10
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    IZ42's Avatar

    Join Date
    Nov 2014
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    What sound does 3 elephants falling down a cliff, two hitting land and one hitting water sound like?

    Ba-dum tsshh.
    Spoiler: Quotes!
    Show
    Quote Originally Posted by Elricaltovilla View Post
    I always thought understanding Scottish required a fort save vs. Alcohol poisoning.
    Quote Originally Posted by Twelve.five
    Hipsterdin- Smiting Heathens before it was cool.
    Quote Originally Posted by Elricaltovilla
    See, this wouldn't happen if you were a Zweihander Sentinel Warder with Silver Crane. You'd have a 60 ft. fly speed with good maneuverability, DR and glowing pants as early as level 8.

    Pink is Neutral Evil, because reasons.


    Exalted Monk Avatar by ThePrez1776

  11. - Top - End - #11
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Lheticus's Avatar

    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Anywhere but real life.
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    Quote Originally Posted by IZ42 View Post
    What sound does 3 elephants falling down a cliff, two hitting land and one hitting water sound like?

    Ba-dum tsshh.
    I dub this joke "The Biggest Rimshot Ever."
    It's not whether you win or lose...it's why you're playing in the first place.

  12. - Top - End - #12
    Troll in the Playground
     
    TheWombatOfDoom's Avatar

    Join Date
    May 2012
    Location
    Aldain
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    If cookie monster were big enough to eat a country, which county would he eat first?
    Scientific Name: Wombous apocolypticus | Diet: Apocolypse Pie | Cuddly: Yes

    World Building Projects:
    Magic
    : The Stuff of Sentience | Fate: The Fabric of Physics | Luck: The Basis of Biology

    Order of the Stick Projects:
    Annotation of the Comic | Spell Compendium of the Comic | Transcription of the Comic
    Dad-a-chum? Dum-a-chum? Ded-a-chek? Did-a-chick?
    Extended Signature | My DeviantArt | Majora's Mask Point Race
    (you can't take the sky from me)

  13. - Top - End - #13
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Lheticus's Avatar

    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Anywhere but real life.
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    Quote Originally Posted by TheWombatOfDoom View Post
    If cookie monster were big enough to eat a country, which county would he eat first?
    Cookie Country.
    It's not whether you win or lose...it's why you're playing in the first place.

  14. - Top - End - #14
    Troll in the Playground
     
    TheWombatOfDoom's Avatar

    Join Date
    May 2012
    Location
    Aldain
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    Quote Originally Posted by Lheticus View Post
    Noooo. VietNOMNOMNOMNOMNOMNOM
    Scientific Name: Wombous apocolypticus | Diet: Apocolypse Pie | Cuddly: Yes

    World Building Projects:
    Magic
    : The Stuff of Sentience | Fate: The Fabric of Physics | Luck: The Basis of Biology

    Order of the Stick Projects:
    Annotation of the Comic | Spell Compendium of the Comic | Transcription of the Comic
    Dad-a-chum? Dum-a-chum? Ded-a-chek? Did-a-chick?
    Extended Signature | My DeviantArt | Majora's Mask Point Race
    (you can't take the sky from me)

  15. - Top - End - #15
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Lheticus's Avatar

    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Anywhere but real life.
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    Quote Originally Posted by TheWombatOfDoom View Post
    Noooo. VietNOMNOMNOMNOMNOMNOM
    Ya gotta admit though, ya weren't expecting that were ya? :P
    It's not whether you win or lose...it's why you're playing in the first place.

  16. - Top - End - #16
    Halfling in the Playground
     
    Trevortni's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jan 2015
    Location
    Seattle, WA
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    Quote Originally Posted by Lheticus View Post
    I dub this joke "The Biggest Rimshot Ever."
    The International Space Station falls from orbit and breaks into three pieces, the first two of which impact on land, and the third one lands in the water.

    Ba-dum tssh.
    78% of DM's started their first campaign in a tavern. If you're one of the 22% that didn't, copy and paste this into your signature.

    Where did you start yours?
    I started with a false start on a planet seconds before it collided with another planet. When it started for real, it was on a prison transport ship that got shipwrecked.

    Quote Originally Posted by goto124 View Post
    I want these guys in a campaign.

    'Hey, pretty necromancer, wanna post for a photograph?'

    'Could you hurry up? I wanna see her insides!'

  17. - Top - End - #17
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Lheticus's Avatar

    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Anywhere but real life.
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    What is the difference between a stage magician and a politician? I actually want people to try and answer this one please.
    It's not whether you win or lose...it's why you're playing in the first place.

  18. - Top - End - #18
    Halfling in the Playground
     
    Trevortni's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jan 2015
    Location
    Seattle, WA
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    Quote Originally Posted by Lheticus View Post
    What is the difference between a stage magician and a politician? I actually want people to try and answer this one please.
    The way you say that, it almost sounds like it might not have an answer yet, or you might be trying to find the answer?

    - - - Updated - - -

    How about:

    One of them uses psychology and distraction to sell illusions to people who pretend not to notice that he's blatantly lying to them. The other one does magic tricks.
    78% of DM's started their first campaign in a tavern. If you're one of the 22% that didn't, copy and paste this into your signature.

    Where did you start yours?
    I started with a false start on a planet seconds before it collided with another planet. When it started for real, it was on a prison transport ship that got shipwrecked.

    Quote Originally Posted by goto124 View Post
    I want these guys in a campaign.

    'Hey, pretty necromancer, wanna post for a photograph?'

    'Could you hurry up? I wanna see her insides!'

  19. - Top - End - #19
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Lheticus's Avatar

    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Anywhere but real life.
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    Quote Originally Posted by Trevortni View Post
    The way you say that, it almost sounds like it might not have an answer yet, or you might be trying to find the answer?

    - - - Updated - - -

    How about:

    One of them uses psychology and distraction to sell illusions to people who pretend not to notice that he's blatantly lying to them. The other one does magic tricks.
    It does have an answer already. I didn't even come up with this joke, I heard it on Youtube. Your answer wasn't the one I heard, but it's still good.

    The one I heard was:

    Spoiler: canon answer
    Show
    The magician is actually convincing.
    It's not whether you win or lose...it's why you're playing in the first place.

  20. - Top - End - #20
    Halfling in the Playground
     
    Trevortni's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jan 2015
    Location
    Seattle, WA
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    What do you get when you cross the Atlantic Ocean with the Titanic?
    78% of DM's started their first campaign in a tavern. If you're one of the 22% that didn't, copy and paste this into your signature.

    Where did you start yours?
    I started with a false start on a planet seconds before it collided with another planet. When it started for real, it was on a prison transport ship that got shipwrecked.

    Quote Originally Posted by goto124 View Post
    I want these guys in a campaign.

    'Hey, pretty necromancer, wanna post for a photograph?'

    'Could you hurry up? I wanna see her insides!'

  21. - Top - End - #21
    Firbolg in the Playground
     
    Lentrax's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    Location
    In the Final Frontier
    Gender
    Male2Female

    Default Re: Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    The sinking of the unsinkable, which shall sink our hearts. And wallets too if we invested in that company.
    Girl we need some ACTION!

    Custom STO avatar by Durkoala.

    Lentrax has a Deviantart now, check it out!

  22. - Top - End - #22
    Halfling in the Playground
     
    Trevortni's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jan 2015
    Location
    Seattle, WA
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    Close, but the answer I was looking for is:
    Spoiler: Answer
    Show
    halfway
    78% of DM's started their first campaign in a tavern. If you're one of the 22% that didn't, copy and paste this into your signature.

    Where did you start yours?
    I started with a false start on a planet seconds before it collided with another planet. When it started for real, it was on a prison transport ship that got shipwrecked.

    Quote Originally Posted by goto124 View Post
    I want these guys in a campaign.

    'Hey, pretty necromancer, wanna post for a photograph?'

    'Could you hurry up? I wanna see her insides!'

  23. - Top - End - #23
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    DrowGuy

    Join Date
    Jan 2015
    Location
    Astral Plane
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    What is the best weapon of all time?
    Spoiler: Quotes
    Show

    Quote Originally Posted by Murska View Post
    Xihirli is insane, so he's pretty hard to read anyway.
    Quote Originally Posted by DM77
    In all honesty, I'm not sure what Xihirli's motivations were...
    Quote Originally Posted by Prince Zahn View Post
    His "stab-and-be-stabbed" existence is one of his best features!
    Quote Originally Posted by Lheticus View Post
    You've been stabbed HOW many times?!
    Quote Originally Posted by Jim Obergefell
    "[Today's ruling] affirms what millions across this country already know to be true in their hearts: our love is equal."

  24. - Top - End - #24
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Socksy's Avatar

    Join Date
    Dec 2013
    Location
    Red Dragon Territory
    Gender
    Female

    Default Re: Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    Quote Originally Posted by Xihirli View Post
    What is the best weapon of all time?
    According to AD&D, a shovel.
    But I'll go with the pen, because it's mightier than the sword!

    What's the difference between a grotty old bus stop and a lobster with breast implants?
    Spoiler: Answer
    Show

    One's a crusty bus station... The other's a busty crustacean!
    Last edited by Socksy; 2015-06-06 at 02:46 PM.
    ℓαυяιn ιѕ тнє вєѕт ℓєgισnnαιяє

    Spoiler: Quotes!
    Show

    Quote Originally Posted by Keltest View Post
    Most men are actually The Flash in disguise.
    Quote Originally Posted by Anlashok View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by sideswipe View Post
    ban the problem spells and the problem classes. not the whole book.
    So.. Keep the bard?
    Quote Originally Posted by Story View Post
    The only thing worse than a Beholder with an anti-magic cone is a Beholder without the anti-magic cone.
    Quote Originally Posted by DigoDragon View Post
    Baaa, I can think! Baaa, I can't see in the dark!

  25. - Top - End - #25
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Lheticus's Avatar

    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Anywhere but real life.
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    What's the difference between that last joke and someone trying to play a guitar with a broken arm?

    Spoiler
    Show
    One's a straining pun, the other is a paining strum.
    Last edited by Lheticus; 2015-06-11 at 10:06 PM.
    It's not whether you win or lose...it's why you're playing in the first place.

  26. - Top - End - #26
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    GAAD's Avatar

    Join Date
    Feb 2014

    Default Re: Ask a stupid question... ("joke" riddle thread)

    What do you call a grieving pharaoh in the first stage of grief?

    Spoiler
    Show
    In de nile.
    Have a gaad day everybody!
    I like white text. Highlight my posts for bonus goodies.
    I hope this sentence is the highlight of my sig.
    Currently playing the Azurites in Civ Game 10. "...But lets face it, your children are going to die horribly and there's nothing you can do about it." - the first Grand Azurite Advisor Dude
    Avatar Avatar avatar by Howl

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •