Entirely practical yet utterly ridiculous dreams

[Jeff the Green]

So I just realized that one of the things I want to do in my life is kind of ridiculous even though it's absolutely feasible. I want to have a Great Dane named Barnaby, a Maine Coon named Rabbit, and a Flemish Giant named Hasenpfeffer. And I want to walk all three of them on leeshes down the street every day and probably cause car crashes.

What are your ridiculous dreams?

[Serpentine]

I have a few - they're even in my Life Plan. It includes:

- Own a Newfoundland dog.
- Build my own awesome minigolf course.
- Have my own hedge maze.

When I've got those, I'll know I've made it. Although I like warm weather, so a Newfie might, sadly, not be vialble
(unless I got it a swimming pool all of its own! )

[Anarion]

- Build my own awesome minigolf course.
- Have my own hedge maze.

These are together, right? Please tell me they're together.

I dunno if I have any really ridiculous dreams. I'd like to argue a case in front of the U.S. Supreme Court at some point in my life, which I guess is aiming high, but that tends to be a matter more of luck and circumstance than professional success as a lawyer (you'll get everything from high-paid specialists to random local public defenders, depending on which cases the Court decides to take).

At some point, if I had enough money, I think it would be interesting to get all my Internet friends from all the different places I frequent and fly them all out somewhere to get together for a weekend gaming retreat or something of that sort. It would probably be horrifically awkward, but fun.

[Jeff the Green]

These are together, right? Please tell me they're together.

I dunno if I have any really ridiculous dreams. I'd like to argue a case in front of the U.S. Supreme Court at some point in my life, which I guess is aiming high, but that tends to be a matter more of luck and circumstance than professional success as a lawyer (you'll get everything from high-paid specialists to random local public defenders, depending on which cases the Court decides to take).

At some point, if I had enough money, I think it would be interesting to get all my Internet friends from all the different places I frequent and fly them all out somewhere to get together for a weekend gaming retreat or something of that sort. It would probably be horrifically awkward, but fun.

Nah, that's pretty normal. What'd be ridiculous is wanting to be the first ICC prosecutor to call a dolphin as a witness, which is what I only sort of jokingly described as my career goal in high school.

[SiuiS]

It would probably be horrifically awkward,

Yes. Yes it would. Definitely fun though!


I always wanted to build a wizard's tower. Four stories, brick facade, thematic interior. Also, a hobbit hole, a dungeon (in the D&D sense, although...) and hopefully have them all on the same property.


My much more attainable goal would be to build a shrine-like building for practicing martial arts in. The weird part? Removing my identity to train my offspring without it affecting the parent-child dynamic. Sort of a Roshi/Jacki chun thing. That's not likely to happen though because when I explained it once I had a friend out Child Protective Services on speed dial, and no matter how safe anything of the sort would be it's going to be the devil to explain safely.

[Gnome Alone]

Yes. Yes it would. Definitely fun though!


I always wanted to build a wizard's tower. Four stories, brick facade, thematic interior. Also, a hobbit hole, a dungeon (in the D&D sense, although...) and hopefully have them all on the same property.

Okay, I'm gonna be thinking of you as the coolest person ever for at least a week now, hope that's okay.

I thought this thread was gonna be about stuff like that infuriating phenomenon of dreaming about having to get up and get ready to go to work, then waking up and having to get ready and go to work.

And on the subject, sort of, of the actual topic: ever since Fallout New Vegas came out I have kind of really wanted to make a Followers of the Apocalypse labcoat and wear it just everywhere, yea though it marketh me as a dorkazoid most true.

[Winter_Wolf]

My ridiculous dream is moving to the desert*. Not middle of nowhere by myself, but some arid community with a lot of heat (barring those cold desert nights). 'Course, I love the Pacific Northwest way too much to ever forsake all that lovely green, but considering that where I am now (which is neither desert nor anywhere near the Pacific), it's gonna be a long, miserable, snowy winter, I'd be just happy happy happy to move to a hot desert.

*Like American Southwest, not like above the arctic circle.

[Serpentine]

These are together, right? Please tell me they're together.

It wasn't, but now you mention it...

[RabbitHoleLost]

I want a small farm with a handful of barnyard animals (most of all including a cow named Milkshake) and a small vegetable garden

Boyfriend and I have discussed it.
It's unlikely buuuuut that doesn't make me want it any less, even though I have no experience with that sort of thing

[Brother Oni]

Be debt free by the time I retire.

[SiuiS]

Ah, Onisan. Just look into getting a tiny house, being a prepper and live off the grid!

What's quality of life compared to monetary bragging rights?

[SowZ]

Yes. Yes it would. Definitely fun though!


I always wanted to build a wizard's tower. Four stories, brick facade, thematic interior. Also, a hobbit hole, a dungeon (in the D&D sense, although...) and hopefully have them all on the same property.


My much more attainable goal would be to build a shrine-like building for practicing martial arts in. The weird part? Removing my identity to train my offspring without it affecting the parent-child dynamic. Sort of a Roshi/Jacki chun thing. That's not likely to happen though because when I explained it once I had a friend out Child Protective Services on speed dial, and no matter how safe anything of the sort would be it's going to be the devil to explain safely.

LARPers would pester you all the time, haha.

[Lheticus]

Move to England and spend the rest of my life with my online boyfriend.
I wonder how many minds this blew?

[Serpentine]

? Why would it blow any minds? If you mean cuz you're talking about a boyfriend and that according to your gender icon you're also a boy, well... We have two LGBT threads running right here in this subforum. Maybe you'd be interested in checking them out?

[Brother Oni]

Ah, Onisan. Just look into getting a tiny house, being a prepper and live off the grid!

What's quality of life compared to monetary bragging rights?

Except that being debt free would enable me to spend more on improving my quality of life, or more likely, let me maintain my current quality of life on my pension.

[Lheticus]

? Why would it blow any minds? If you mean cuz you're talking about a boyfriend and that according to your gender icon you're also a boy, well... We have two LGBT threads running right here in this subforum. Maybe you'd be interested in checking them out?

No, you see...that was a trick question--and you gave the right answer. ^_^

[Bulldog Psion]

None of my dreams are particularly interesting, and if I detail them, I'm probably going to end up sounding bitter.

Well, actually, here's one that is actually a real dream of mine, but is weird enough to be fun and entertaining (I hope) :

Winning enough in a lottery so that I can help fund the genetic resurrection of the Passenger Pigeon, if that project proves to be possible. (Woolly mammoth is my real dream, of course, but I'm not sure if the tech exists for that ... yet.)

(Double edit: please no "cloning of mammoth -- is it morally justified?" debates, I don't want to be the cause of any moderation problems in this thread with my silly, geeky, very sincere dream of restoring a few extinct species.)

[SiuiS]

Okay, I'm gonna be thinking of you as the coolest person ever for at least a week now, hope that's okay.

Sure! I can always use preening~!

I thought this thread was gonna be about stuff like that infuriating phenomenon of dreaming about having to get up and get ready to go to work, then waking up and having to get ready and go to work.

Ugh. I hate those. And the stereotypical like, "you're at highschool but NAKED!" Or barefoot or in your undies or something. It's interesting because I have those dreams but I don't really care? I think I just picked them up from the group consciousness.

LARPers would pester you all the time, haha.

That's cool, if I had good land I would run my own. Did Amtgard for a while but the group was a bit too set in their ways and too juvenile, and I want more role playing and less stick combat. Not that stick combat is bad mind, but I can get beat up with sticks without driving out of town and wearing heavy clothes.

Except that being debt free would enable me to spend more on improving my quality of life, or more likely, let me maintain my current quality of life on my pension.

But if you get debt free by reducing your quality of life and then increase your quality of life with the savings, aren't you in debt again?

Or is this a plateau benchmark thing, like buying in bulk? It's only more economical if A) you will use it all before expiry and B) you can afford the bulk and not have to buy individual packaging?

None of my dreams are particularly interesting, and if I detail them, I'm probably going to end up sounding bitter.

Well, actually, here's one that is actually a real dream of mine, but is weird enough to be fun and entertaining (I hope) :

Winning enough in a lottery so that I can help fund the genetic resurrection of the Passenger Pigeon, if that project proves to be possible. (Woolly mammoth is my real dream, of course, but I'm not sure if the tech exists for that ... yet.)

(Double edit: please no "cloning of mammoth -- is it morally justified?" debates, I don't want to be the cause of any moderation problems in this thread with my silly, geeky, very sincere dream of restoring a few extinct species.)

That's pretty cool actually.

If I win the lottery in giving everyone I know and care about two million. And if they ever ask me for money again I'll slap them. Two million is a 20,000 dollar salary from interest every year! You were set for life! How did you mess that up?!

I would of course retain a quantity for myself with which to adventure.

[Winter_Wolf]

But if you get debt free by reducing your quality of life and then increase your quality of life with the savings, aren't you in debt again?

Having been on both sides of debt, I can vouch that it's entirely possible to cut back to get out of debt, then start increasing quality of life and still remain debt free. But there's increasing quality of life, then there's going bananas because of some need to "make up for" depriving yourself. That said, two places I'll never cut back on are durable goods and quality food. I might not do much going out for food or movies or whatnot entertainment, but things which need to (and do) last or be actually nutritious demand a higher price for a reason. 'Course once in a while you get an unusually good deal, and once in a while you find out someone is charging way too much for an inferior product, but it's mitigated by informed decision making.

Because compound interest almost never works in your favor (interest on savings, say), but nearly always against you (just check out most loan/credit rates and terms).

[noparlpf]

Be debt free by the time I retire.

Hahahaha haha ha *sobs* *sobs a lot* *drowns in tears*

I'm looking at $200-300k for vet school. I don't foresee being debt-free ever and I'm not even old enough to drink yet. ;-;

[Aedilred]

If I win the lottery in giving everyone I know and care about two million. And if they ever ask me for money again I'll slap them. Two million is a 20,000 dollar salary from interest every year! You were set for life! How did you mess that up?!

As soon as you make any purchases or investments out of that figure, though, it eats into the capital (thus reducing interest) and also ties up funds. Unless they just plonk two mil in a savings account and try to live off that, which is probably one of the worst ways to manage the money, they're never going to have that cash available in one hit. They'd certainly end up asset-rich but not necessarily cash-rich. And $20K/year isn't exactly a fortune if it's your only source of income (which it hopefully shouldn't be).

Also, people who aren't used to having money often don't know how to manage it when they do. That's one of the reasons people get trapped in poverty, and so many lottery winners go bankrupt.

If that was your intention you'd probably be better off sticking the money in trust and scheduling payments of $20K/year to each beneficiary. That way they don't have the option of screwing it up. The trustees still do, of course.

Of course, none of that means they should ask you for money after you've already been so generous.

When I saw the thread title I assumed it meant dreams, which was uncannily timed following a dream last night where I was called away from my sister's wedding to attend an interview for a job I hadn't applied for at a magazine I didn't read, and because the interview was too far to reach and back in a single day (although I got a taxi there) I had to stay with my ex's former landlady on arrival.

[Grinner]

When I saw the thread title I assumed it meant dreams, which was uncannily timed following a dream last night where I was called away from my sister's wedding to attend an interview for a job I hadn't applied for at a magazine I didn't read, and because the interview was too far to reach and back in a single day (although I got a taxi there) I had to stay with my ex's former landlady on arrival.

That's some crazy recall you have there.

[SowZ]

That's some crazy recall you have there.

It's a skill and can be developed. Back when I was a lucid dream trainer I could recall 17 or 18 dreams a night in vivid detail. Hours worth of stuff. Not because I'm crazy smart or anything, but just because I'd practiced it for years.

[Anarion]

Nah, that's pretty normal. What'd be ridiculous is wanting to be the first ICC prosecutor to call a dolphin as a witness, which is what I only sort of jokingly described as my career goal in high school.

If I were to ever call an animal as a witness, it would have to be some species of parrot in fine Phoenix Wright tradition. Calling a parrot as a witness is the surprise move that never fails. Never. *glowers at anyone about to object*

Be debt free by the time I retire.

Hahahaha haha ha *sobs* *sobs a lot* *drowns in tears*

I'm looking at $200-300k for vet school. I don't foresee being debt-free ever and I'm not even old enough to drink yet. ;-;

Two things. One, being debt free is perhaps the only thing worse than being highly indebted that you can do to your credit rating. Because the credit rating system is in competition for the "most stupid thing known to humanity" award. So, there's that.

Two, if you're not doing things with other people's money, you're not doing enough things. The investment choice is about relative profit from an investment compared to relative cost of a loan, with a small premium of how much you can handle should an emergency come up. Student loans, for example, are overrated to pay off because you can frequently invest the money you would have spent paying the loan on something that's more lucrative instead and make the minimum loan payment. If you ever own property that you don't live in, taking equity loans and refinancing is a great way to have lots of cash when you need it, and you can either do that for a big emergency or other major expenditure knowing that you can handle the payments for a while after (that should be rare), or you can use it to make further investments that pay for the monthly debt.

[noparlpf]

Two things. One, being debt free is perhaps the only thing worse than being highly indebted that you can do to your credit rating. Because the credit rating system is in competition for the "most stupid thing known to humanity" award. So, there's that.

Two, if you're not doing things with other people's money, you're not doing enough things. The investment choice is about relative profit from an investment compared to relative cost of a loan, with a small premium of how much you can handle should an emergency come up. Student loans, for example, are overrated to pay off because you can frequently invest the money you would have spent paying the loan on something that's more lucrative instead and make the minimum loan payment. If you ever own property that you don't live in, taking equity loans and refinancing is a great way to have lots of cash when you need it, and you can either do that for a big emergency or other major expenditure knowing that you can handle the payments for a while after (that should be rare), or you can use it to make further investments that pay for the monthly debt.

Except that I literally don't even care about the money. If I wanted money I would go into something with a cheap entry cost and high return, not something with a near-impossible entry cost and low return.

[Grinner]

It's a skill and can be developed. Back when I was a lucid dream trainer I could recall 17 or 18 dreams a night in vivid detail. Hours worth of stuff. Not because I'm crazy smart or anything, but just because I'd practiced it for years.

It's not for a lack of trying on my part. I've been keeping a dream journal, but I get them muddled so often. That, or I'll simply go a week without remembering them.

Wonder if my sleep patterns have anything to do with it?

[Jeff the Green]

None of my dreams are particularly interesting, and if I detail them, I'm probably going to end up sounding bitter.

Well, actually, here's one that is actually a real dream of mine, but is weird enough to be fun and entertaining (I hope) :

Winning enough in a lottery so that I can help fund the genetic resurrection of the Passenger Pigeon, if that project proves to be possible. (Woolly mammoth is my real dream, of course, but I'm not sure if the tech exists for that ... yet.)

(Double edit: please no "cloning of mammoth -- is it morally justified?" debates, I don't want to be the cause of any moderation problems in this thread with my silly, geeky, very sincere dream of restoring a few extinct species.)

No ethical debate, but from a scientific standpoint, wooly mammoth might be the easier of the two, at least if you don't want it to be a one-off. I don't know how well the passenger pigeon specimens we have are preserved from a DNA standpoint, so it's possible that the deep freeze some mammoth specimens have been in would be better for reconstituting their genetic material in a useful format too, but more importantly, the proximate cause of the passenger pigeon's extinction wasn't excessive hunting (though that's certainly the ultimate cause); it was alee effects. (Well, technically the proximate cause was probably a stroke.)

Basically, in order to reproduce at a sustainable rate, they needed a certain, fairly large, population size, much low how if the entire human population were reduced to 10,000 people now we'd have a hard time keeping the species from going extinct even though we've been that low before. Once they were brought below that by hunting, they were doomed and only an effort more massive than what we're doing for the whooping cranes could have saved them. So, while you could probably get a self-sustaining (if horribly inbred and vulnerable to disease) population of mammoths going with just a few cloned individuals and a few protected generations, you'd need to produce thousands of passenger pigeons in the lab and a breeding facility before you could get to that point.

[SowZ]

It's not for a lack of trying on my part. I've been keeping a dream journal, but I get them muddled so often. That, or I'll simply go a week without remembering them.

Wonder if my sleep patterns have anything to do with it?

I used to be a lucid dream trainer. I'm familiar with all kinds of dreamers. If you'd like help, feel free to PM me. Absolutely no pressure, though.

[SiuiS]

Because compound interest almost never works in your favor (interest on savings, say), but nearly always against you (just check out most loan/credit rates and terms).

Oh? Could you do a breakdown? I get cross-eyed when reading sense numbers unless I'm already interested, and a conversational tone would help. A PM would work to avoid derailment.

Hahahaha haha ha *sobs* *sobs a lot* *drowns in tears*

I'm looking at $200-300k for vet school. I don't foresee being debt-free ever and I'm not even old enough to drink yet. ;-;

Aye. I'm at a tenth of that, but still.

I don't even care about the money. I have a roof, communion and food (most of the time ). But that's gotta change, I've got progeny. Sigh.

If that was your intention you'd probably be better off sticking the money in trust and scheduling payments of $20K/year to each beneficiary. That way they don't have the option of screwing it up. The trustees still do, of course.

That's about what I meant, just without the specifics. After one year. Two million pays your taxes and gives you a decent enough salary. You can live on twenty K – I lived on ten for a few years. You just need your priorities straight. And having that much supplemental makes even a job like "seven eleven night crew" comfy.

I strongly advocate against anyone rich quitting. There's nothing like purposeless boredom to make you burn assets.

That's some crazy recall you have there.

Isn't that normal? At least immediately afterwards? My biggest issue isn't recall, it's differentiation. I'm still sifting through which childhood memories actually happened.

If I were to ever call an animal as a witness, it would have to be some species of parrot in fine Phoenix Wright tradition. Calling a parrot as a witness is the surprise move that never fails. Never. *glowers at anyone about to object*

I read that as call a Phoenix to the stand, parrot right style. I was like, "dream big, buddy! Dream big~"

Two things. One, being debt free is perhaps the only thing worse than being highly indebted that you can do to your credit rating. Because the credit rating system is in competition for the "most stupid thing known to humanity" award. So, there's that.

Two, if you're not doing things with other people's money, you're not doing enough things. The investment choice is about relative profit from an investment compared to relative cost of a loan, with a small premium of how much you can handle should an emergency come up. Student loans, for example, are overrated to pay off because you can frequently invest the money you would have spent paying the loan on something that's more lucrative instead and make the minimum loan payment. If you ever own property that you don't live in, taking equity loans and refinancing is a great way to have lots of cash when you need it, and you can either do that for a big emergency or other major expenditure knowing that you can handle the payments for a while after (that should be rare), or you can use it to make further investments that pay for the monthly debt.

One of these days I'm going to have to sit you down with a newspaper and a legal pad and figure out the practical upswing of all this. It's so sound in theory and then the rubber hits the road and Derp.

I blame it on living my life like a waking dream. Well. Not blame. Acknowledge as a side effect.

[late for dinner]

I like this thread. Ok, so maybe you might not think these are ridiculous, but they are pretty dreamy to me...yet still completely realistic.

1: When (If) I get to retire: Move to California and live out the rest of my years as a Cast member at Disneyland...driving a car, running the tower of terror, walking down the street in a top hat and cane and smiling at people, being the train conductor...anything. It blows "Being a greeter at Wal-Mart" out of the water for cool "retirement" jobs.

2: Travel to Ireland, go to a small town pub, and sing Irish pub songs with the locals...including my favorite: "The Parting Glass". (Do they still sing songs in pubs in Ireland?)

3: Own a coffee/board game shop...and by this I mean. I want to own a coffee shop that is fairly big. Inside, I would have tons of tables and my giant board game collection. People could come in and pay a fee for the day/game, buy coffee/edible stuff/beer, and just hang out and play fun board games. My staff would be knowledgeable in all my game's rules, so they could also be mediators/rule clear-er uppers. I would also have a small stage in the corner where I could host Karaoke and open mic nights. The Barne's & Nobels just closed down close to where I live. I feel that that space would be sufficiant :-) Location would have to be key to keep this a successful business...probably close to Arizona State University. I could partner with a local coffee shop/coffee cult to provide coffee. The only thing that is really keeping me from doing this is the starting capital.