Fastest way to kill the multiverse [3.5]

[Venger]

Please, allow me to present a theory.

Somewhere within the multiverse is the Plane of Giants' Playgrounds, populated entirely by insane wizards who whose astral projections fly through space, destroy the universe using black holes and projectile livestock, and then rebuild it as they see fit just to tidy up after themselves.

We do not Gate in eldritch horrors to destroy planes of existence.

We are the horrors Gated in to destroy planes of existence.

FTFY.

I'm sure tippy will come in and correct us again.

[Extra Anchovies]

FTFY.

I'm sure tippy will come in and correct us again.

With Astral Projections of Ice Assassins of Ice Assassins, probably.

[IZ42]

...I remember when this game was about slaying dragons and taking their stuff

May I sig this?

[Milodiah]

May I sig this?

Go ahead, is my goal.

[Phelix-Mu]

If so, where's my Gate? That sounds a lot more fun than college...

Twist: You get to go to the Plane of Giants' Playgrounds, and the eldritch horror gets to go to college.

Take that, Pandorym! 400-level math courses until you can live no more!

[Abd al-Azrad]

I know this isn't the fastest way to destroy the Multiverse, because its range is explicitly limited and therefore I'll pretty much never cause unlimited amounts of devastation. Also, because I'm not rules-saavy, I'm crossing 3.5 and Pathfinder.

Anyway. I'm thinking a crafting wizard with a Thrallherd cohort. The crafting wizard makes a whole bunch of Metamagic Gems, or some other single-use item that adds a specific metamagic effect (in this case, Flash Frost, Energy Admixture, Born of Three Thunders, Explosive Spell) to a spell. Your Thrallherd selects wizard minions with the Snowcasting feat, and makes sure a couple can manage the Locate City spell. Pass the gems out to your Thrallherd's fanatical minions of apocalypse, send them off in different directions.

As I say, impractical. The reason I bring it up is because I actually used this in a campaign: some crazy wizard-type had discovered the Locate City Bomb recipe, and was wandering around wiping out kingdoms. The party had to stop him somehow, knowing only that vast stretches of countries were being obliterated, seemingly at random.

[Venger]

With Astral Projections of Ice Assassins of Ice Assassins, probably.

Probably an Aleax in the process there somewhere too.

If so, where's my Gate? That sounds a lot more fun than college...

You gotta become an outsider first.

[SiuiS]

Sonic admixtured vile sanctified infinitely widened infinitely prolonged maximized breath weapon. The entire plane is permanently encased in the original breath type and also sonic energy for all eternity, doing enough damage to leave free floating obdurium objects for a few weeks.

Add in animate breath (sir/wiz 7) and you now also qualify to throw dimensional spell on their, obliterating the ethereal as well. Both the ethereal and prime material planes are now one unified and massive sonic elemental. Because portals are not objects which can be destroyed, your breath is now reaching through them to undo whatever it finds – multiversal travelers are surprised to see a blast wave of shimmering force explode out of every portal and begin destroying things simply by existing (if open portals and gates didn't already allow the literally infinite burst of your breath to enter these other planes) for rounds per level.

Be a spell to power erudite instead of sorc/wiz and use the benefit of Psionic ice so that your breath weapon does it's normal energy and sonic energy with reflex saves for half and also a Psionic power version of the breath admixture spell to get cold on there (half of which damages even cold immune enemies) with a fortitude save for half. Top it up with dispelling breath for a multi plane wide d20+15 dispel check against all the things.

Whatever can withstand literally infinite rounds of, say you're a red dragon because chaotic evil, 12d6 fire 12d6 sonic 12d6 cold, avoid having it's protections dispelled, avoid the beatings of an elemental, and heck, can survive 4d4 negative levels on top, in a multiverse that no longer has a prime material, ethereal, astral, shadow, or several upper and lower planes? It deserves to live.

For greater fun, somehow turn into an advanced pyro clastic dragon first, just for the added insult of a dc15 disintegrate that extends across all creation – and affects objects.

[Phelix-Mu]

You gotta become an outsider first.

Nitpick: You just need to be extraplanar, not be an outsider. This is basically why gate RAW is borked, because EVERYONE can get the extraplanar subtype just by being on the wrong plane.

/nitpick.

[Inevitability]

Be a 3rd-level human sorcerer. Your feats are Extend Spell, Heighten Spell, Extra Spell (Time Stop), Extra Spell (Gate) and Persistent Spell.

Make a Faustian Pact for a 16th-level spellslot. You can sell your soul if necessary (after all, there won't be any hell to go to when you have destroyed all of creation).

Now cast an Extended Persistent Time Stop. You gain 2 days of apparent time, which you can use as you want.

Rest 8 hours. Cast Heightened Gate to open a portal to Plane X. Rest 8 hours. Cast Extended Persistent Time Stop. Rinse, repeat. Eventually, you'll have a portal to every plane in existence.

Wait for the time stop to wear off, readying an action to immediately cast Gate to gate in a Genius Loci of infinite size when it does. Time stop ends, you cast your spell, giant Genius Loci causes this world and all others to collapse into a black hole.

[Venger]

what book is "genius loci" in? I've never heard of it before.

[Extra Anchovies]

what book is "genius loci" in? I've never heard of it before.

It's an arbitrarily-sized ooze from the ELH. Also on the SRD.

[Phelix-Mu]

what book is "genius loci" in? I've never heard of it before.

It's Epic Level Handbook, unless I am much amiss.

[Venger]

It's an arbitrarily-sized ooze from the ELH. Also on the SRD.

It's Epic Level Handbook, unless I am much amiss.

Thanks. I don't play epic.

What a ridiculous monster

[ben-zayb]

Be a 3rd-level human sorcerer. Your feats are Extend Spell, Heighten Spell, Extra Spell (Time Stop), Extra Spell (Gate) and Persistent Spell.

Make a Faustian Pact for a 16th-level spellslot. You can sell your soul if necessary (after all, there won't be any hell to go to when you have destroyed all of creation).

Now cast an Extended Persistent Time Stop. You gain 2 days of apparent time, which you can use as you want.

Rest 8 hours. Cast Heightened Gate to open a portal to Plane X. Rest 8 hours. Cast Extended Persistent Time Stop. Rinse, repeat. Eventually, you'll have a portal to every plane in existence.

Wait for the time stop to wear off, readying an action to immediately cast Gate to gate in a Genius Loci of infinite size when it does. Time stop ends, you cast your spell, giant Genius Loci causes this world and all others to collapse into a black hole.

Heightened Gate? Is there a particular reason why?

And you might need a few more steps, considering you need an epic feat to heighten above 9th level spells.

[Extra Anchovies]

What a ridiculous monster

Indeed. Especially since there's a spell by the same name that replicates the concept of a genius loci in a much better fashion (the caster determines one or more triggering conditions which summon an elder elemental to attack whoever triggers the conditions).

[Inevitability]

And you might need a few more steps, considering you need an epic feat to heighten above 9th level spells.

Darn it, missed that. Okay, version 2.0...

Spoiler

Show

Be a 1st-level human sorcerer worshipping Vhaeraun. Your feats are Extend Spell, Arcane Disciple (trickery), Arcane Disciple (drow), and Persistent Spell.

Make a Faustian Pact for a 16th-level spellslot and a 9th-level spellslot. You can sell your soul if necessary (after all, there won't be any hell to go to when you have destroyed all of creation).

Now cast an Extended Persistent Time Stop. You gain 2 days of apparent time, which you can use as you want.

Rest 8 hours. Cast Gate to open a portal to Plane X. Rest 8 hours. Cast Extended Persistent Time Stop. Rinse, repeat. Eventually, you'll have a portal to every plane in existence.

Wait for the time stop to wear off, readying an action to immediately cast Gate to gate in a Genius Loci of infinite size when it does. Time stop ends, you cast your spell, giant Genius Loci causes this world and all others to collapse into a black hole.

Okay, this should work. Anything that I've overseen?

[Heliomance]

Darn it, missed that. Okay, version 2.0...

Spoiler

Show

Be a 1st-level human sorcerer worshipping Vhaeraun. Your feats are Extend Spell, Arcane Disciple (trickery), Arcane Disciple (drow), and Persistent Spell.

Make a Faustian Pact for a 16th-level spellslot and a 9th-level spellslot. You can sell your soul if necessary (after all, there won't be any hell to go to when you have destroyed all of creation).

Now cast an Extended Persistent Time Stop. You gain 2 days of apparent time, which you can use as you want.

Rest 8 hours. Cast Gate to open a portal to Plane X. Rest 8 hours. Cast Extended Persistent Time Stop. Rinse, repeat. Eventually, you'll have a portal to every plane in existence.

Wait for the time stop to wear off, readying an action to immediately cast Gate to gate in a Genius Loci of infinite size when it does. Time stop ends, you cast your spell, giant Genius Loci causes this world and all others to collapse into a black hole.

Okay, this should work. Anything that I've overseen?

Persistent Time Stop doesn't work that way. Most consistent way I can see to rule it is that it gives you 1d4+1 rounds of actions over the space of 24 hours.

[AuraTwilight]

Iron Heart Surge gravity and watch the entire Material Plane come apart at a molecular level.

[bigstipidfighte]

I'm going to play devil's advocate and try to refute some of the ideas offered up so far. These arguments will of course be merely for the sake of science. I want to destroy the world as much as the next playgrounder. Not a physicist myself so I’m not going to comment one way or the other on various entries trying to create black holes.

Summon Fiat Monster- Ninjamaster1991- Summoning “some statless eldrich horror from beyond the stars” doesn’t seem feasible to me for a non-DM. It’s by definition fiat.

Brown Mold Apocaplypse- Phelix Mu and others- It seems that if the mold worked this way, the world would be dead already. So either the world is destroyed and you didn’t do it, or it doesn’t work that way and you can’t destroy the world.

Super Dragon Breath- Venger- How does this destroy a planet, let alone the multiverse? It’s big, but not overly damaging.

Super-Duper Tryhard Dragon Breath- SiuiS -Now this is getting somewhere. I’m pretty sure Line of Effect isn’t going to let it follow the curvature of the planet, or shoot anything more than a narrow beam through a portal though. I might have more objections, but these are the most obvious. Do you have a counter to the line of effect issue? Not taking the time to look everything you mentioned up since it’s a long one.

Iron Heart Surge the Universe- AuraTwilight- Even if it worked, destroys exactly one planet. Moving on…

A whole new world- Forestfire- I’m not familiar with the time travel spell, but assuming it works as you say it does, that sounds at least plausible. If no one else comes out either to back you up or refute you, I might dedicate the time to looking it up and forming a proper opinion. This is my favorite entry so far.

EDIT- I'd be much more inclined to check the work of anyone willing to post book references, and MUCH more inclined if also offered page references. With dndtools and crystalkeep down referencing things like this is a chore.

[Heliomance]

EDIT- I'd be much more inclined to check the work of anyone willing to post book references, and MUCH more inclined if also offered page references. With dndtools and crystalkeep down referencing things like this is a chore.

Crystal Keep got rehosted.

[Venger]

also, all of these are very old jokes/tricks. it's not hard to google. mine's helpfully explained in one of the dragonfire adept handbooks or another. the others I think are all catalogued in the dirty tricks handbook.

[bigstipidfighte]

A link to a post containing page references would be perfectly acceptable if such exists.

[SiuiS]

Be a 3rd-level human sorcerer. Your feats are Extend Spell, Heighten Spell, Extra Spell (Time Stop), Extra Spell (Gate) and Persistent Spell.

Won't work for two reasons. The first is that the square cube law doesn't exist, and the take away is that mass does not increase gravity. The second is the very same sourcebook limits time stops in duration, saying that's all reality can handle.

Although that means "forcing time stop to provide more than that many rounds" is a valid end world tactic.

Super-Duper Tryhard Dragon Breath- SiuiS -Now this is getting somewhere. I’m pretty sure Line of Effect isn’t going to let it follow the curvature of the planet, or shoot anything more than a narrow beam through a portal though.

Bursts specifically expand through holes much wider than just a beam, as I recall, and an infinitely long beam that is the tentacle of an infinitely large elemental is still sufficient – apocalypse from the sky does less damage for less time and levels mountains. An object will stop a burst if it has more hp than the burst does damage, otherwise the burst destroys the object and keeps going, right? The planet is made of small portions of stone, you can easily do enough damage to overcome each small section individually with shenanigans.

If the material has actual curvature and isn't just an infinite plane like the rest (I'm partial to going high enough leads to elemental air, not space; planet core leads to elemental earth, no magma, etc) then add in the feat that lets a dragon explode their breath out in a burst sphere instead of a cone or line.

The real trick is getting the necessary feats and spells and such by a reasonable enough level. I feel it's best though because it's the only actual rules based version so far: the rules themselves apply damage to all things across the multiverse, as opposed to nebulous and non-rule things like gravity or pseudonatural horrors undoing physics.

I might have more objections, but these are the most obvious. Do you have a counter to the line of effect issue? Not taking the time to look everything you mentioned up since it’s a long one.

Intuition. I may be crossing burst rules from 2e, 3.0 and 3.5. I'll check when I have the time and inclination. :)

A whole new world- Forestfire- I’m not familiar with the time travel spell, but assuming it works as you say it does, that sounds at least plausible. If no one else comes out either to back you up or refute you, I might dedicate the time to looking it up and forming a proper opinion. This is my favorite entry so far.

Teleport through time is finicky. It has a material component of a flower or plant clipping from an area that has never before encountered sapient life. Most people say "screw that, use eschew materials!", but... You kinda can't? I mean you can, but you teleport to where and when that flower was, so if you remove the flower entirely you can blow the spell slot but you won't go anywhere. And that's part of the actual spell text, it's not just a line in the crunch about components. It's very up in the air.

Everythig else checks out from memory though, if that was @teleport back in time and replace this plane with genesis".

EDIT- I'd be much more inclined to check the work of anyone willing to post book references, and MUCH more inclined if also offered page references. With dndtools and crystalkeep down referencing things like this is a chore.

I used the draconomicon, PHB and spell-to-power erudite.

[bigstipidfighte]

Before we go any further, Bad Wolf, would you care do define "fastest?"

Lowest level? Least amount of personal time invested? Least amount of time elapsed between start and completion of plan?

Alternatively, was the title largely unrelated, and this is more of a chance to toss around wacky idea than a competition?

[OldTrees1]

Did anyone mention a way to extend the explicit RAW blackhole from Elder Evils pg 142 to the other planes? It won't be the fastest method since it takes more than 1 turn for the Sphere of Annihilation to mature into a Black Hole but it is the most complete method.

Would Planar Shepherds attuned to the Material Plane work?
Would Gates work?

[Flickerdart]

4) destroy the earth and kill everyone on its surface.

Congrats, you destroyed most life on one planet out of an uncountable multitude, without even making a dent in the planet itself. Give yourself a pat on the back.

[Urpriest]

Iron Heart Surge gravity and watch the entire Material Plane come apart at a molecular level.

As a physicist I have to comment on this. What exactly do you think holds molecules together?

Edit: Also, the enormous elemental can't just stick its tentacles through Gates or Portals. Once you contact a Gate/Portal you are immediately shunted through. Similarly, spell effects probably can't pass through, since they're not "things" (individual objects) or creatures.

[Venger]

As a physicist I have to comment on this. What exactly do you think holds molecules together?

well, at least he knew it was one of the four fundamental forces, just not the right one.

[Bad Wolf]

Before we go any further, Bad Wolf, would you care do define "fastest?"

Lowest level? Least amount of personal time invested? Least amount of time elapsed between start and completion of plan?

Alternatively, was the title largely unrelated, and this is more of a chance to toss around wacky idea than a competition?

More tossing around ideas then an actual competition.