The All Guardsmen Party

[Shoggy]

Hi folks, I've wandered to this board in hope of finding an appreciative audience for a story about bravery, incompetence, and detpacks.

A few months ago my childhood gaming group got back together to play a session of Only War and I tried my hand at writing, since then it has grown beyond what any of us expected. I realize that Only War and its underlying setting are not exactly mainstream around here, but I've tried to keep things accessible and will happily explain or clarify anything that's unclear.

Be aware that this thing gets rather long in the later chapters and there is a significant tone shift after the prologue. Sorry about that, the story has been continuing for a while now and I lack any sort of editor.

The Adventures of the All Guardsmen Party

Since the original thread links and images contain language which may or may not be considered to fit into a subset of words which could possibly be defined as 'naughty' I can only make the html version available.

http://www.theallguardsmenparty.com/


Finally, if any of you folks are up for it, I'm starved for literary criticism. Any input would be most welcome, as well as comments and questions.

[Rabidmuskrat]

Literary critique? Well, basically, it's bloody excellent and where can I get more? Seriously, I think this deserves to be stickied up along with SilverClawShift's campaigns.

The only thing that I wonder is how much of this is due to the DM being a railroady bastard who basically wrote the story (and the characters) and how much of it is due to the characters being lovable, insane, explosive-obsessed rascals. I do hope its the second one.

[Sartharina]

After reading the first spoiler box... Holy ****. Your DM certainly has captured the feel of the setting, but I don't know how fun it was (or would be) to play.

[Shoggy]

Literary critique? Well, basically, it's bloody excellent and where can I get more? Seriously, I think this deserves to be stickied up along with SilverClawShift's campaigns.

The only thing that I wonder is how much of this is due to the DM being a railroady bastard who basically wrote the story (and the characters) and how much of it is due to the characters being lovable, insane, explosive-obsessed rascals. I do hope its the second one.

Glad you liked the stories and if the Silver Claw Shift campaigns are the ones I remember (with the binders and the bugs) that's quite high praise. Thanks.

I wouldn't say that the campaign has been very railroady, our DM has a fetish for building big flowcharts to track what everyone is doing and anticipate our most likely actions. So there's a fair amount of flexibility in the missions though he will rearrange things in the background to fit narrative causality.

I think the primary reason the campaign has been flowing so well is because we're all veteran players and we're all aiming to improve the overall story. Each of us has a pretty good idea what the others are going to do and we tend to act like loud people at a movie and yell advice at each other, someone will suggest that it would be endlessly amusing if Nubby stole something or Doc failed a medical knowledge roll, and half the time the player will agree and shift their actions.

After reading the first spoiler box... Holy ****. Your DM certainly has captured the feel of the setting, but I don't know how fun it was (or would be) to play.

That first session was rough, honestly if we all hadn't known the bugger for about a decade we'd have gotten fed up and demanded an explanation or change of campaign. It paid off in the end though, he set up a very cool origin story and gets to brag about pulling off such a novel mission idea. Thankfully none of the other sessions have been that draining.

[Sartharina]

With a less competent DM/trusting player group, this whole thing (Especially those first sessions) could easily have been a "What am I supposed to do?"-style thread. But... wow, this has been a fun Dark Heresy campaign to read about, even though it does the opposite of what most advice for running D&D campaigns. (Lots of 'Gandalf's - almost a new one every session! Except they're all incompetent or heretic, heavy 'railroading'... sort of, Players are supposedly insignificant mooks, etc.) Gunner's death was shocking... but I am really confused how Nubby, Cutter, and Sarge survived against the traitor interrogator (Which is as far as I've gotten so far). Doors are useful, apparently.

[Shoggy]

The secret to a lot of the near misses is that we're allowed to spend and burn fate points (official rerolls and get out of jail free cards) on eachother instead of just ourselves. Our DM usually balances things right so that we're running out as we hit the last few encounters.

[Smorgonoffz]

Just..........WOW!!!, i really hated the Dm in the first adventure but then the story gets better and better XD.

Also i cannot imagine this campaign without thinkin Discworld guards !!!

Some questions:

1) is nubby's character base on nobby nobbs?
2) is the sergeant name samuel?

[Sartharina]

Finally finished... and wow. What a final mission. Will more be coming?

[Shoggy]

Just..........WOW!!!, i really hated the Dm in the first adventure but then the story gets better and better XD.

Also i cannot imagine this campaign without thinkin Discworld guards !!!

Some questions:

1) is nubby's character base on nobby nobbs?
2) is the sergeant name samuel?

We ripped of discworld very heavily back in our D&D days and the tradition continues. Nubby's sheet started as the standard level 1 guardsmen template with "Nobby Nobbs expy" penciled on and nothing else.

Sarge isn't really based on anyone though, he's just the cynical straight-man and therefore bleeds together with other cynical straight-men.

Finally finished... and wow. What a final mission. Will more be coming?

Yes, after the holidays. I am not good at doing outdoor family stuff and writing at the same time.

[Sartharina]

Now I want to play a WH40k game as a chaos space marine that's a completely chill bro.

[blacklight101]

Now I want to play a WH40k game as a chaos space marine that's a completely chill bro.

That's a fantastic idea, actually. I may have to do the same. The Dudebro Chapter.

[Sartharina]

That's a fantastic idea, actually. I may have to do the same. The Dudebro Chapter.

No.... dudebro LEGION. Chapters are for the sissy followers of the Dead God on his Golden Toilet.

[flare'90]

Do you use the 1st or the 2nd edition of Dark Heresy?
I think the 2nd because of ease of conversion between it and Only War, but you never know.

[blacklight101]

No.... dudebro LEGION. Chapters are for the sissy followers of the Dead God on his Golden Toilet.

Duh, Chaos.


I'm good like that.


Dudebro Legion sounds way better, like a big chill frat party in space. With recruitment worlds and battlefleets too.

[Sartharina]

Still - I'm pretty sure that had someone in the AGP or one of their cadets had started laughing during the negotiations with Chaos, the CSMs also would have started laughing as well. Alas, two parties, so alike in disposition, separated by a needlessly destructive war.

[blacklight101]

Telling my wife about the Dudebro Legion and my son randomly speaks up and says "Dudebro. yeah!" Isn't he a cute little Chaos convert? I hope he follows Tzeench like his mommy.

[Shoggy]

Do you use the 1st or the 2nd edition of Dark Heresy?
I think the 2nd because of ease of conversion between it and Only War, but you never know.

1st edition since we started with it and have too many rules to easily switch to second. Shame it wasn't out when we started though, would have saved a bunch of time.

[Valefor Rathan]

Just read the first spoiler tag...

I am in awe...

[blacklight101]

What was the bodycount on that first spoiler? It got high enough that I'm intrigued, that's for sure. I know you said you as a party had gone through more than 100 in that first spoiler, but do you have a total count? Never having to come up with characters that fast before, I'm honestly intrigued.

I can just see: "Go get 'em, Lil' Jimmy VI!"

[Squark]

Glad you liked the stories and if the Silver Claw Shift campaigns are the ones I remember (with the binders and the bugs) that's quite high praise. Thanks.

I wouldn't say that the campaign has been very railroady, our DM has a fetish for building big flowcharts to track what everyone is doing and anticipate our most likely actions. So there's a fair amount of flexibility in the missions though he will rearrange things in the background to fit narrative causality.

I imagine it also helps that Fantasy Flight Games's systems tend to be pretty improvisation friendly (Very simple statblocks, a focus on theatre of mind, and scaling difficulty has a clear description). Mundane Characters are also a little more predictable than, say, a party with a Psyker, Tech Priest, and faith-focused Priest (And knowing the players as well as the DM apparently does helps too).

[Shoggy]

Just read the first spoiler tag...

I am in awe...

So were we.

What was the bodycount on that first spoiler? It got high enough that I'm intrigued, that's for sure. I know you said you as a party had gone through more than 100 in that first spoiler, but do you have a total count? Never having to come up with characters that fast before, I'm honestly intrigued.

I can just see: "Go get 'em, Lil' Jimmy VI!"

I can't be exact but can do some math. For JUST PC deaths it was up to 15 a mission depending on if we got reinforcements, so the first night was a mere 7. The next day was Orks and Traitors, which were split into about 12 missions and 8 respectively. I'd say the average death count for each came out to 6 or 7, so call it 120 deaths on that day. It was bloody rough and we got VERY minimal on the characters near the end of the night. Usually it was just a matter of grabbing a template, slapping on a name 2-3 defining characteristics, then winging it in the pre-combat talky part of the mission. The final day was around 6 missions of Orks and 10 Nids, we generally did better in those, but that just gave us more time to reinforce so the figure stayed about the same, so call it another 100 deaths. So round figures, say 225 deaths over 2.5 days of gaming and 37 survivors.

It was grueling and I don't remember the names or anything else about 80% of the characters we rolled, which is saying something for me. What I do remember is recycling characters that didn't even get to talk, filling in some sheets with "X expy" then just parodying various characters (which is where Nubby came from), and refusing to go too deeply into character traits and motivations since they'd probably die anyway.

There were four little Jimmys and one big Jimmy. We called him Jimmy Voltron and he died to friendly shelling during the nid fights.

I imagine it also helps that Fantasy Flight Games's systems tend to be pretty improvisation friendly (Very simple statblocks, a focus on theatre of mind, and scaling difficulty has a clear description). Mundane Characters are also a little more predictable than, say, a party with a Psyker, Tech Priest, and faith-focused Priest (And knowing the players as well as the DM apparently does helps too).

I think the mundane characters help out a fair bit for the improv aspect, just because we rarely get into arguments about what is 'possible'. None of us has ever had to argue with our GM about whether a psyker can summon up the ghost of a dead witness or if a techpriest can make a toaster feel love. Mostly we're able to back everything up with some semi-logical and easily understandable arguments and there's not much dipping into the wiki or sourcebooks.

[blacklight101]

I can't be exact but can do some math. For JUST PC deaths it was up to 15 a mission depending on if we got reinforcements, so the first night was a mere 7. The next day was Orks and Traitors, which were split into about 12 missions and 8 respectively. I'd say the average death count for each came out to 6 or 7, so call it 120 deaths on that day. It was bloody rough and we got VERY minimal on the characters near the end of the night. Usually it was just a matter of grabbing a template, slapping on a name 2-3 defining characteristics, then winging it in the pre-combat talky part of the mission. The final day was around 6 missions of Orks and 10 Nids, we generally did better in those, but that just gave us more time to reinforce so the figure stayed about the same, so call it another 100 deaths. So round figures, say 225 deaths over 2.5 days of gaming and 37 survivors.

It was grueling and I don't remember the names or anything else about 80% of the characters we rolled, which is saying something for me. What I do remember is recycling characters that didn't even get to talk, filling in some sheets with "X expy" then just parodying various characters (which is where Nubby came from), and refusing to go too deeply into character traits and motivations since they'd probably die anyway.

There were four little Jimmys and one big Jimmy. We called him Jimmy Voltron and he died to friendly shelling during the nid fights.

It sounds every bit of grueling, but oh-so-rewarding there at the end. Hell, I still miss Heavy. Can't get enough of Twitch and Nubbs either- real favorites if I ever was forced to pick two.

All I can really say is: Wow, now that's a story.

I think all you have left to do now is fight some Tau and become Inquisitor yourself. Loving the AGP and I can't wait for the story to keep growing.

[Freelance GM]

I just finished "What's in the Box," and well, Twitch is a god amongst mere mortals.

He probably has a premature and gruesome death in the next chapter.

[Shoggy]

I just finished "What's in the Box," and well, Twitch is a god amongst mere mortals.

He probably has a premature and gruesome death in the next chapter.

Thankfully no, but our DM started looking a lot harder at our detpack usage after that. He also started to officially let Twitch blind-roll to see if his paranoia got close to reality on each mission.

[FlyingScanian]

One question about the "Nubby's Girlfriend" arc, specifically the door(s) (and follow-up of heavily armored goons) landing on Sarge: Did anyone burn any fate points for him to survive all of that (and, if so, how many did he need with that and the follow-up bolot pistol?), or is he just that darn hard?

[Shoggy]

One question about the "Nubby's Girlfriend" arc, specifically the door(s) (and follow-up of heavily armored goons) landing on Sarge: Did anyone burn any fate points for him to survive all of that (and, if so, how many did he need with that and the follow-up bolot pistol?), or is he just that darn hard?

Sarge was tied with Cutter for highest toughness, was wearing his armor, and the door was ruled to be AP 5 and heavy as hell. The flip side of this was that he was taking fatigue and impact damage and was considered to be encumbered. Our GM was also picking some critical impact effects off the table.

Overall that session didn't have many desperate battles and we didn't even have to burn fate to save Twitch (though he and Sarge did meta game the slightest bit to keep him alive). That said, the fights in the building used just about all of our fate re-rolls for the session. Sarge didn't burn any, but he had to reroll to keep the door balanced on his back and he wasted two trying not to eat that flash grenade. Nubby rerolled to dodge behind the psyker when we were flanked and burned a point to take the sword at thigh level instead of gut and rerolled to get his pickpocket off. There were a few others in there as well, like the rolls to get out of the crashed flier and such, but those were the highpoints.

Also a fate point was burned to save the Guardswoman, because we liked her, she's in the pool now.

[Hazrond]

Sarge was tied with Cutter for highest toughness, was wearing his armor, and the door was ruled to be AP 5 and heavy as hell. The flip side of this was that he was taking fatigue and impact damage and was considered to be encumbered. Our GM was also picking some critical impact effects off the table.

Overall that session didn't have many desperate battles and we didn't even have to burn fate to save Twitch (though he and Sarge did meta game the slightest bit to keep him alive). That said, the fights in the building used just about all of our fate re-rolls for the session. Sarge didn't burn any, but he had to reroll to keep the door balanced on his back and he wasted two trying not to eat that flash grenade. Nubby rerolled to dodge behind the psyker when we were flanked and burned a point to take the sword at thigh level instead of gut and rerolled to get his pickpocket off. There were a few others in there as well, like the rolls to get out of the crashed flier and such, but those were the highpoints.

Also a fate point was burned to save the Guardswoman, because we liked her, she's in the pool now.

good sir, i finished reading the entire series the other night, and i must say i am envious of how amazing your group is, which character do you play? (twitch is my favorite )

[LeSwordfish]

Are you allowed to say who you were playing in this thread? I'm very curious.

[Kid Jake]

Just finished it and it's a good read. Really made me start wanting to put together a Dark Heresy game and I don't think I've touched that book twice since I bought it.

Also, my guess is that you were playing Heavy/Cutter.

[Hazrond]

Just finished it and it's a good read. Really made me start wanting to put together a Dark Heresy game and I don't think I've touched that book twice since I bought it.

Also, my guess is that you were playing Heavy/Cutter.

my bet is on either twitch or nubby, those two seem to get alot of attention/awesomeness so maybe he is posting to show off how awesome he and his party are?