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    Halfling in the Playground
     
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    biggrin Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    Post descriptions of what you feel would be the absolute most annoying, most lore-breaking, most mary-sueish,or most inconvienient to build and/or to maintain characters here. We can make a forum game out of it. Like, you post what character the player presents you with and then some over-the-top reaction you'd love to do but probably wouldn't in real life.

    EDIT: In other words, make up deliberately terrible characters so we can all have a good laugh.

    I'll go first:

    Player Brings:
    A multi-class level 1 Psion (I already hate this character), level 1 fighter, level 1 bard, level 1 rogue, level 1 ranger, and level 1 tantrist, with plans to go into a prestige class from an obscure supplement later on. This character is a homebrew race between half-dragon (black) and tiefling. It has put almost every rank into diplomacy so that it can manipulate others. And it has a tragic-backstory of being rejected for being different and being kind to innocents but having an uncontrollable rage when betrayed that destroys everything around it. It gave up on love and happiness a long time ago because its significant other dumped it after tearing its heart out, eating it, sacrificing the character's fiends and family, corrupting their homeroom teacher, and making their pet hamster die. The character's only character fault is its own power, they also have long black hair that is constantly flowing. For their weapons they took the ambidexterity and monkey grip feats and dual-wield scythes made out of their own hatred and pain.

    My Reaction:
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    Last edited by Altrunchen; 2015-02-06 at 06:28 PM.

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    Bugbear in the Playground
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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    A kender thief.
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    biggrin Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    Quote Originally Posted by neonchameleon View Post
    A kender thief.
    Just one post, and we already have a Winner...
    Last edited by Killer Angel; 2015-02-06 at 04:10 PM.
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    Great analysis KA. I second all things you said
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    Great analysis KA, I second everything you said here.
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    If I have a player using Paladin in the future I will direct them to this. Good job.
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    THIS is proof that KA is amazing
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    Killer Angel, you have an excellent taste in books
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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    Quote Originally Posted by neonchameleon View Post
    A kender thief.
    Guard: "Stop right there criminal scum! Did you steal that amulet?"

    Kender Thief: "You bet I did mister! :D"

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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    Just any kender.
    Thanks to zegma for my awesome avatar.
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    We will not let Nessie down! http://www.petitiononline.com/PLEAOSAR/
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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    Quote Originally Posted by mikeejimbo View Post
    Just any kender.
    When I saw the dude's post, I didn't know what a Kender was. So I looked it up and, yeah, I can see how they'd be annoying in general. They're like munchkins or something. I'm so glad I haven't run into these things in my actual games.

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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    Quote Originally Posted by neonchameleon View Post
    A kender thief.
    Um, that's a character, not a Player. And a well-played kender thief is a boon to any party, just like a well-played character of any other class. And a kender thief in the hands of a jerk player is a detriment to any game, just as any other character in the hands of a jerk player.

    Hate the player, not the race/class.
    Oops. I somehow mistook this for the Worst Players thread.
    Last edited by Lord Torath; 2015-02-06 at 04:38 PM.
    Thri-Kreen Ranger/Psionicist by me, based off of Rich's A Monster for Every Season

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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    Kender shouldn't be that bad in theory, but I swear 98% of the time they are.
    Thanks to zegma for my awesome avatar.
    Proudly the founder of the Mr. Scruffy fanclub.
    We will not let Nessie down! http://www.petitiononline.com/PLEAOSAR/
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    ElfRangerGuy

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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    This isn't the worst character I can think of, but I seriously had a player for a D&D 3.5 game make a TWF Ranger with a level or two of Fighter who stubbornly wore medium armor and wielded a battleax in two hands, didn't have any ranged weapons worth mentioning, and never bothered taking an animal companion. I don't quite remember their exact skill allocation, but I'm pretty sure they were garbage at tracking.
    "Nothing you can't spell will ever work." - Will Rogers

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    Remember, Evil isn't "selfish". It's Evil. "Look out for number one" is a Neutral attitude. Evil looks out for number one while crushing number two.

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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    Wait wait wait guys... I got dis.


    Pun-Pun
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elricaltovilla View Post
    I always thought understanding Scottish required a fort save vs. Alcohol poisoning.
    Quote Originally Posted by Twelve.five
    Hipsterdin- Smiting Heathens before it was cool.
    Quote Originally Posted by Elricaltovilla
    See, this wouldn't happen if you were a Zweihander Sentinel Warder with Silver Crane. You'd have a 60 ft. fly speed with good maneuverability, DR and glowing pants as early as level 8.

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    DwarfBarbarianGuy

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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    After going through a number of options with a less experienced player she decided to go for a Human Ranger wielding a reach weapon two-handed. (Pathfinder, so it wouldn't be a terrible carreer choice.) I helped her optimize her feats and traits a bit and then she decided when she reached level 2 that dualwielding longswords was so much better (She had already taken Power Attack and Combat Reflexes at level 1) I used math to show her the error of her ways. She is now convinced a greatsword would do her more good than a lucerne hammer. She still hasn't made that much use of her Combat reflexes though.
    (She once also decided her level 5 sorcerer needed the Intensified Spell metamagic feat.)

    The Human Summoner in the same game has a constitution of 8. (25 point buy) He is not a Synthesist.

    The Gnome Sorcerer's (Infernal bloodline) favorite spell is Chaotic Vitality from Deep Magic. We are playing Way of the Wicked, an adventurepath where you are not allowed to be chaotic or good... He chose the Gifted Adept trait and used it on Magic Missile. He also has the highest bluff score, but his player is not very adept at bluffing, preferring to blurt out the things we'd rather keep secret instead.

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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Torath View Post
    Um, that's a character, not a Player. And a well-played kender thief is a boon to any party, just like a well-played character of any other class. And a kender thief in the hands of a jerk player is a detriment to any game, just as any other character in the hands of a jerk player.

    Hate the player, not the race/class.
    Oops. I somehow mistook this for the Worst Players thread.
    No worries, this is supposed to be more of a forum game where we purposefully make up terrible character ideas for laughs.

    Quote Originally Posted by mikeejimbo View Post
    Kender shouldn't be that bad in theory, but I swear 98% of the time they are.
    Well like Lord Torath was about to say, a good player with just about any kind of character is a boon to the party, whereas a bad player is always a detriment.

    Quote Originally Posted by KillianHawkeye View Post
    This isn't the worst character I can think of, but I seriously had a player for a D&D 3.5 game make a TWF Ranger with a level or two of Fighter who stubbornly wore medium armor and wielded a battleax in two hands, didn't have any ranged weapons worth mentioning, and never bothered taking an animal companion. I don't quite remember their exact skill allocation, but I'm pretty sure they were garbage at tracking.
    Well, did they at least have fun? I mean that's kind of the ultimate goal of the game regardless of one's approach to it imho.

    Quote Originally Posted by IZ42 View Post
    Wait wait wait guys... I got dis.


    Pun-Pun
    What do you mean?

    Quote Originally Posted by the_david View Post
    After going through a number of options with a less experienced player she decided to go for a Human Ranger wielding a reach weapon two-handed. (Pathfinder, so it wouldn't be a terrible carreer choice.) I helped her optimize her feats and traits a bit and then she decided when she reached level 2 that dualwielding longswords was so much better (She had already taken Power Attack and Combat Reflexes at level 1) I used math to show her the error of her ways. She is now convinced a greatsword would do her more good than a lucerne hammer. She still hasn't made that much use of her Combat reflexes though.
    (She once also decided her level 5 sorcerer needed the Intensified Spell metamagic feat.)

    The Human Summoner in the same game has a constitution of 8. (25 point buy) He is not a Synthesist.

    The Gnome Sorcerer's (Infernal bloodline) favorite spell is Chaotic Vitality from Deep Magic. We are playing Way of the Wicked, an adventurepath where you are not allowed to be chaotic or good... He chose the Gifted Adept trait and used it on Magic Missile. He also has the highest bluff score, but his player is not very adept at bluffing, preferring to blurt out the things we'd rather keep secret instead.
    Hmm, sounds like this person was given more options than they knew what to do with. Generally when I run a campaign with some noobs in it, I highly suggest that they do the tried-and-true human fighter. Because it has a simple role that it fills very well and it's not difficult to understand like some other classes are. They just get feats over time. Bland, I know, but I recommend it for total noobs to D&D so they can watch the others play and learn by doing instead of being overwhelmed with all the options out there. Say what you will about player choice, sometimes they just don't know what they want. But that's just me.

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    NecromancerGuy

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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    Quote Originally Posted by neonchameleon View Post
    A kender thief.
    Kender thieves aren't that bad - any sensible party will murder it beyond hope of resurrection the moment it enters play, and volia! Problem solved.

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    NecromancerGuy

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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    Quote Originally Posted by Altrunchen View Post
    N
    What do you mean?
    Pun Pun is a rules-exlpoiting kobold who can bootstrap himself to godhood.

    http://www.dandwiki.com/wiki/Pun-Pun...acter_Build%29

    http://1d4chan.org/wiki/Pun-Pun

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    Dwarf in the Playground
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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    Kender Monk wearing Chainmail, with negative DEX and WIS modifiers.
    What time is it?

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    Zombie

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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    I played a Kender Thief once that everyone enjoyed. He managed to become a god during the second play session, but he was fun while he lasted.

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    Imp

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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Torath View Post
    Um, that's a character, not a Player. And a well-played kender thief is a boon to any party, just like a well-played character of any other class. And a kender thief in the hands of a jerk player is a detriment to any game, just as any other character in the hands of a jerk player.

    Hate the player, not the race/class.
    Oops. I somehow mistook this for the Worst Players thread.
    The worst player would be whoever willingly makes a Kender thief character ;)
    Yar! I'm a signature virus, copy me into your signature!

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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    Quote Originally Posted by neonchameleon View Post
    A kender thief.
    I can do one better.

    kender batman wizard.
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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    I'm a little bit confused. What, exactly is the problem with kender?

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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    I have just the comic:
    Quote Originally Posted by Telok View Post
    Imagine if the combat system was as well thought out and explained as the skill system. You could cut it down to a page and a half, monsters would be about three sentences long. Best of all you don't have to remember any tables for conditions or detail the special abilities because you've got rulings instead of rules.
    Quote Originally Posted by Artanis View Post
    I'm going to be honest, "the Welsh became a Great Power and conquered Germany" is almost exactly the opposite of the explanation I was expecting

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    BardGuy

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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    They're an entire race of allegedly adorable kleptomaniac halflings from Dragonlance who the setting bends over backwards to portray as just sho shweet.

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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    My brother tells me how much of a [bad person] I am when I just say the 'Kender'. For example (my brother's building a homebrew universe for context):

    Me: So, have you built a world of Kender yet?
    Brother: Have I ever told you how much of a [bad person] you are?
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elricaltovilla View Post
    I always thought understanding Scottish required a fort save vs. Alcohol poisoning.
    Quote Originally Posted by Twelve.five
    Hipsterdin- Smiting Heathens before it was cool.
    Quote Originally Posted by Elricaltovilla
    See, this wouldn't happen if you were a Zweihander Sentinel Warder with Silver Crane. You'd have a 60 ft. fly speed with good maneuverability, DR and glowing pants as early as level 8.

    Pink is Neutral Evil, because reasons.


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    Colossus in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    Quote Originally Posted by IZ42 View Post
    My brother tells me how much of a [bad person] I am when I just say the 'Kender'. For example (my brother's building a homebrew universe for context):

    Me: So, have you built a world of Kender yet?
    Brother: Have I ever told you how much of a [bad person] you are?
    Eh, Kender don't work too badly when they're isolated. A kender-only society would have very high rates of information and wealth exchange, and the lack of emphasis on material wealth (since kender get bored with it very quickly) would result in a fairly egalitarian society. This works better when they come on the tail of another civilization, though, since infrastructure work takes patience they wouldn't have.
    Quote Originally Posted by Telok View Post
    Imagine if the combat system was as well thought out and explained as the skill system. You could cut it down to a page and a half, monsters would be about three sentences long. Best of all you don't have to remember any tables for conditions or detail the special abilities because you've got rulings instead of rules.
    Quote Originally Posted by Artanis View Post
    I'm going to be honest, "the Welsh became a Great Power and conquered Germany" is almost exactly the opposite of the explanation I was expecting

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    Bugbear in the Playground
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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    Quote Originally Posted by Masterkerfuffle View Post
    I'm a little bit confused. What, exactly is the problem with kender?
    Kender were basically written as a race that gave jerk players full license to go wild, and are portrayed utterly inconsistently. Stealing from the party and provoking the monsters because "I'm bored" are written into the race description. And more to the point they aren't just written in, they are written in inconsistently. So other races find Kender shenanigans charming (i.e. Kender should go wild). And Kender "have no concept of personal property" except they always steal, never give - and they will lie about what they stole rather than just shrug. Someone annotated the 3e writeup of Kender to say what they actually thought.
    Currently in playtesting, now with optional rules for a cover based sci-fi shooter.
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    BlackDragon

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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    A Gnomish Barbarian...

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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    Um...could we maybe, idk, stay on topic here? This was supposed to just be a fun game about making up silly and dumb characters, but it seems like it's becoming just a discussion about one race e_e;;; .

    Quote Originally Posted by supergoji18 View Post
    A Gnomish Barbarian...
    Ah, there we go. :D

    Believe it or not, I had that in one of my campaigns once. He wanted to play a Spore-Totem (Homebrewed from this forum) and he did alright. Even if he got his ass whooped by the half-orc fighter regularly XD.
    Last edited by Altrunchen; 2015-02-07 at 12:21 PM.

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    Flumph

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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    Quote Originally Posted by mikeejimbo View Post
    Kender shouldn't be that bad in theory, but I swear 98% of the time they are.
    In the Planescape setting, a kender that is a member of the Xaositects.

    As for others off the top of my head, a thri-kreen swashbuckler on a ship with elven crewmates, and a half-ogre rogue. I also one time played a necromancer sorcerer elf whose ambition was to conquer Kyonin with an undead army. he had a wisdom score of 7.

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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    Fourth Edition, a Vryloka with the Vampire class who took the Vampiric Heritage feat.

    Or for a different breed of obnoxious,

    Hey guys my characters a half-werewolf (her mom was a werewolf at full moon when she was born so she has some traits like little claws and ears like a nekojin, so kawaii) Samurai and on her first adventure she ran into a beautiful vampire who she fell in love with and he bit her and made her a vampire too, but then he ran away and so she's searching for him but shes special so she doesn't burn in sunlight or have to drink blood unless she wants to and her names Sakura Rayvnne.

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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    Quote Originally Posted by Corsair View Post
    Hey guys my characters a half-werewolf (her mom was a werewolf at full moon when she was born so she has some traits like little claws and ears like a nekojin, so kawaii) Samurai and on her first adventure she ran into a beautiful vampire who she fell in love with and he bit her and made her a vampire too, but then he ran away and so she's searching for him but shes special so she doesn't burn in sunlight or have to drink blood unless she wants to and her names Sakura Rayvnne.
    Don't forget how she's 100 years old but looks 16, and fights with a legendary katana only she can wield.
    Quote Originally Posted by Telok View Post
    Imagine if the combat system was as well thought out and explained as the skill system. You could cut it down to a page and a half, monsters would be about three sentences long. Best of all you don't have to remember any tables for conditions or detail the special abilities because you've got rulings instead of rules.
    Quote Originally Posted by Artanis View Post
    I'm going to be honest, "the Welsh became a Great Power and conquered Germany" is almost exactly the opposite of the explanation I was expecting

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    Default Re: Post the worst player-characters you can come up with

    Naturally. Her name properly is Sakura Kalu'thira* Amber Destiny Ravynne.



    *Means Twilight Star

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