Personal Woes and Advice 4

[dehro]

So.. Today the thoracic surgeon I have been seeing called. He had me do a full range of tests last week. Apparently the tests seem to indicate that the diagnosis of sarcoidosis I got served with a couple of months ago may not be accurate. The working theory is now lymphoma. Monday I will be told if they will perform a lymphnode biopsy Wednesday or Friday. Either way the medical history and the odds seem to indicate that this is more a case of "let's see what sort of lymphoma he's got" rather than a way to find what other rare illness might be afflicting me.
The biopsy itself is an operation that will keep me in hospital almost a week..And then of course the all important results...
It's all a bit scary.

[JNAProductions]

So.. Today the thoracic surgeon I have been seeing, called. He had me do a full range of tests last week. Apparently the tests seem to indicate that the diagnosis of sarcoidosis I got served with a couple of months ago, may not be accurate. The working theory is now lymphoma. Monday I will be told if they will perform a lymphnode biopsy Wednesday or Friday. Either way the medical history and the odds seem to indicate that this is more a case of "let's see what sort of lymphoma he's got" rather than a way to find what other rare illness might be afflicting me.
The biopsy itself is an operation that will keep me in hospital almost a week..And then of course the all important results...
It's all a bit scary.

*Offers hugs*

I can't really say anything to make it less scary, but I can say that I hope everything turns out okay. You've got my best wishes!

[FinnLassie]

I guess the lesson to be learned here is not to wait until you're out of meds to start thinking about restocking the shelves...

Doctor away for a couple months in a row, I would assume there's a backup doctor? It shouldn't have been a problem, at first sight.

... I think you missed the mark where I mentioned that it's really anxious for me to contact strange people. I did not wait for last minute to do this, I've been holding the phone in my hands for some weeks before I finally got through my anxiety yesterday.

I was informed that the doctor's at sick leave until the very beginning of the month, so I presumed that it's not going to be an issue to renew my meds, but I had not been informed that their leave had been extended to the end of this month.

[lio45]

... I think you missed the mark where I mentioned that it's really anxious for me to contact strange people. I did not wait for last minute to do this, I've been holding the phone in my hands for some weeks before I finally got through my anxiety yesterday.

I thought you said it was harder for you to contact strangers when you're not under your meds, but upon reading your post again, I may have just misinterpreted.

You seem to be a rational person, I find it interesting that you can find it hard to contact someone whose job it is to serve you. I mean, what kind of bad thing for you could possibly happen? From your POV, whoever answers the phone is 100% a NPC who's there only for that sole purpose. It's barely different from an automated phone system ("Press 1 if you're out of meds", etc.)

[LaZodiac]

I thought you said it was harder for you to contact strangers when you're not under your meds, but upon reading your post again, I may have just misinterpreted.

You seem to be a rational person, I find it interesting that you can find it hard to contact someone whose job it is to serve you. I mean, what kind of bad thing for you could possibly happen? From your POV, whoever answers the phone is 100% a NPC who's there only for that sole purpose. It's barely different from an automated phone system ("Press 1 if you're out of meds", etc.)

If you don't understand why someone might have problems talking to a stranger, regardless of the strangers intended purpose, you won't be able to help with this.

Even if it's a stranger who's entire purpose is to serve as an automated phone service, they are still a person. That will make people have anxiety..

[lio45]

If you don't understand why someone might have problems talking to a stranger, regardless of the strangers intended purpose, you won't be able to help with this.

There aren't many possible ways to try to "fix" this.

Either you manage to convince yourself that there's nothing to be anxious about when you're calling someone who's there precisely to serve people who call to the best of his/her ability, or else you just need to get professional help (likely a psy and/or meds).

You're the customer, the other individual is there for you, and it's over the phone, not face to face. It's pretty much the mildest circumstances imaginable for interaction with a strange human being. I would therefore tend to think there's a chance this anxiety can be mitigated by trying to reason it away, with the initial baby step being "success in making a phone call".

[LaZodiac]

There aren't many possible ways to try to "fix" this.

Either you manage to convince yourself that there's nothing to be anxious about when you're calling someone who's there precisely to serve people who call to the best of his/her ability, or else you just need to get professional help (likely a psy and/or meds).

You're the customer, the other individual is there for you, and it's over the phone, not face to face. It's pretty much the mildest circumstances imaginable for interaction with a strange human being. I would therefore tend to think there's a chance this anxiety can be mitigated by trying to reason it away, with the initial baby step being "success in making a phone call".

You really don't seem to understand what anxiety is. You're being pretty rude.

Since this is the Personal Woes and Advice thread, I'll give you some of the latter.

Stop.

[lio45]

You really don't seem to understand what anxiety is. You're being pretty rude.

Since this is the Personal Woes and Advice thread, I'll give you some of the latter.

Stop.

I think there's value in being straightforward. And out of curiosity, what would be the "better" advice that you'd give to someone in her situation? I am noting that you haven't given any...

[LaZodiac]

I think there's value in being straightforward. And out of curiosity, what would be the "better" advice that you'd give to someone in her situation? I am noting that you haven't given any...

She's a friend of mine so I give advice to her directly, because it's easier.

While yes, being strait forward CAN help with certain things, all you've down is blame her for her problems and belittle the stuff she has done to get through it. You aren't giving advice, you're insulting her while using "I'm just telling her hard truths" as a cover. I've seen you do this with other people too, in other threads like this. There's a difference between "being straight forward" and "being an ass".

The advice you should give someone who has social anxiety, especially if it's related to phone anxiety, is to tell them to breath calmly and not give up. To encourage them and help them through it. A more specific type of advice would be "put the number you're trying to call on speed dial" because that gives you less chances to freeze up while dialing it.

Notice that I haven't said "the supremely small baby step of 'phoning a person' " like you did? That I didn't say "it's your fault that you didn't stock up on pills"? That is your problem.

[Astrella]

To sum things up:

• I'm not interested in getting muscular.
• Being muscular would make me more attractive, but only if I stay male.
• Staying male gives me constant self-loathing.
• I have too much to lose if I start transitioning, and it would cripple my social chances even further for years.
• I'm already receiving therapy, but it's insufficient, as it cannot do anything about external factors like other people's perception of me.
• Presenting myself as asexual is counter-productive, as my goal is to find a partner, not merely make a friend (the level of affection that is considered okay with "just friends" is very very limited here).
• I already scour dating sites of all kinds to find people, with a 100% failure rate.
• Both options regarding my gender will create unavoidable and impassable problems, rendering me unable to achieve my goals.
• There is quite simply, no hope for me.

What would you lose by transitioning? And about crippling social changes, eh, yes some people will be jerks, but you will a) feel better with regards to yourself, b) hrt helps your mental state (it did for me a lot), for me transitioning actually improved my social life, didn't worsen it.

And if you're worried about looks, I didn't "look like a girl" at all pre-transition, hrt and other things can do a lot, but like, just feeling better about yourself helps so much.

[Skeppio]

What would you lose by transitioning? And about crippling social changes, eh, yes some people will be jerks, but you will a) feel better with regards to yourself, b) hrt helps your mental state (it did for me a lot), for me transitioning actually improved my social life, didn't worsen it.

And if you're worried about looks, I didn't "look like a girl" at all pre-transition, hrt and other things can do a lot, but like, just feeling better about yourself helps so much.

If I transition, I lose at least half my family. There is no way in hell most of my extended family would approve, and I care about their opinion a lot. It won't help me feel any better, I'll be laughed at and treated as a freak the whole time, because I do not and cannot pass as even remotely feminine. Transitioning would not help my social circle. The only other LGBT folk here I've been able to find are all the SJW nutjobs that I'd sooner drink bleach than interact with.

Every pic I've seen of you looks great and feminine, nothing like me or any look I could ever achieve.

[lio45]

She's a friend of mine so I give advice to her directly, because it's easier.

While yes, being strait forward CAN help with certain things, all you've down is blame her for her problems and belittle the stuff she has done to get through it. You aren't giving advice, you're insulting her while using "I'm just telling her hard truths" as a cover. I've seen you do this with other people too, in other threads like this. There's a difference between "being straight forward" and "being an ass".

The advice you should give someone who has social anxiety, especially if it's related to phone anxiety, is to tell them to breath calmly and not give up. To encourage them and help them through it. A more specific type of advice would be "put the number you're trying to call on speed dial" because that gives you less chances to freeze up while dialing it.

Notice that I haven't said "the supremely small baby step of 'phoning a person' " like you did? That I didn't say "it's your fault that you didn't stock up on pills"? That is your problem.

In my experience, irrational anxiety problems have a chance of successfully, eventually, getting reasoned away. That is basically the same "tell them to not give up" advice as you.

It's important to realize other people have their own priorities, their own problems, and they don't care about you anywhere near the level you might think they do. I know firsthand people whose extreme shyness ultimately got cured by them trying hard to keep that in mind, and it eventually sank in. You think everyone notices you and especially anything slightly wrong you might do, but they really don't, at all.

I suppose you're referring to my being straightforward/"rude" with Skeppio in these threads when you say I do this with others too, but again I genuinely believe that's the best way to help. Others have also been quite frank, even more brutally honest IMO... I can point you to a couple posts if you want...

FWIW, if I were anywhere nearby I'd even offer a meetup in person. I am actually surprised no Aussies from this forum have tried to help in person already. I have one of my exes who moved there (still a good friend of mine), but she's extremely busy these days and not near Melbourne anyway, and honestly I think it would be a bit exaggerated if I were to call in a "personal favor" to make her try to help Skeppio in person. So the next best thing is online advice.

I could easily just not care, Skeppio's woes have 0.0000% impact on my own life, but for some reason I have decided to try to help, and until Skeppio clearly says I should stop, there's some strange force that's driving me to continue.

[FinnLassie]

Anxiety does not equal to shyness (though for some that might be the case).

I get the help I need IRL from professionals (and not just the doctor that's been out of reach for over a month), so I really don't need advice on dealing with my anxiety and depression on this forum. Just support and a place to vent.

[Anuan]

My anxiety has been building up to the point of panic including vomit again recently and I can't help shake these thoughts of inadequacy even though I know I'm totally awesome and wonderful.

Boo-urns.

[HalfTangible]

Speaking on anxiety...

I don't want to call what happened to me a few minutes ago an anxiety attack because that sounds too strong, and wasn't really triggered by anything I can discern, but I'm... not really sure what else to call it. I was thinking about the fact that my parents want to go on a cruise with some family friends (who I hate)... and then about a minute later I'm shaking in my chair (not where I started btw), imagining yelling at my dad after a mistake I made because "I get it, I'm a ****ing screwup, you don't need to say it every single ****ING TIME CAN I GO NOW OR DO YOU HAVE SOMETHING ELSE TO YELL AT ME SOME MORE?!". Then I go up to my room, someone knocks on the door, and I shriek at them to go away. I was crying in the imagined scenario, and I wanted to cry for real too.

It's weird because the scenario was entirely in my head. It wasn't anything worth getting upset over (because it's probably not going to happen), but I was anyway. And now I feel horrible because I'm bringing this up to people who have actual problems that are hurting them and I made mine up, but I still feel like I need to say it, so... here you go.

[Teddy]

Hmm, it's been a long time since I last strayed into this thread. I think this warrants discussion, though...

In my experience, irrational anxiety problems have a chance of successfully, eventually, getting reasoned away. That is basically the same "tell them to not give up" advice as you.

Do you have any scientific studies backing up this experience of yours? You may be both misinterpretting the data and missing crucial nuances of what transpired.

Also, the delivery is just as important as the message. You're not helping if you administer your medicine through a bullet.

It's important to realize other people have their own priorities, their own problems, and they don't care about you anywhere near the level you might think they do. I know firsthand people whose extreme shyness ultimately got cured by them trying hard to keep that in mind, and it eventually sank in. You think everyone notices you and especially anything slightly wrong you might do, but they really don't, at all.

Yes, every person with anxiety knows this. It tends to be the first advice they get whenever their anxiety is outed. If you are right there beside them right at the moment when the anxiety needs to be overcome, it might work as support, but otherwise you're just outing yourself as ignorant of their issues.

I suppose you're referring to my being straightforward/"rude" with Skeppio in these threads when you say I do this with others too, but again I genuinely believe that's the best way to help. Others have also been quite frank, even more brutally honest IMO... I can point you to a couple posts if you want...

[Emphasis is mine.]
Genuine belief is not good enough in this case. A lot of pain in this world stems from people doing bad things they genuinely believed was the best way to help. If you're going to provide help in a way you know may be hurtful, or have been told is hurtful, you need to make sure that there's any scientific backing for those beliefs. Otherwise you're just doing everyone a disfavour.

---

In personal news, I'm currently in the process of moving away from my family, and, well, it's turned out to be a great source of mood swings. I'm the type of person who finds great comfort in stability in my personal life, and the process of moving is the exact opposite of that. What I'm (right...-ly) the most worried about is my eating, as I know I have a tendency to forget meals when being on my own, and for as long as I still don't have a plan in place for solving that issue, it's putting a lot of stress on me.

Also, since this is the first time I'm moving, I have no idea of what to expect in terms of what I need to do and what will happen along the way, which makes planning for it particularly frustrating, because my plans soon become an entangled mess and impossible to express. All in all, this makes the whole process move along very slowly, and I know my parents (especially mum) are starting to get a bit impacient with me and my lack of initiative. I want to talk to them about this, but my personal anxiety is making it hard for me to open up unpromptedly. I wish they would ask me how I'm feeling about everything, but either they already know (or think they know), or the thought hasn't struck them.

For as long as I'm still making progress, this isn't a panic, but I guess I need an outlet for my mind. I guess I wish people would ask me how I'm feeling a little more often, but explicitly requesting that makes it feel cheap when they do (and they usually forget at the same rate as that feeling goes away)...
(If my anxiety was a physical entity, I would glare at it right now for seting up such superficial conditions on what gets to be considered genuine.)

[dehro]

The food issue at least is one that is easily sorted... Put eating in your agenda and have an alarm ring at the appropriate times, allowing time for cooking/preparation. Make a couple of meals in advance and freeze them for those times the alarm catches you without food in the pantry, or otherwise unable to produce food. Schedule at least a weekly run to the stores for groceries... And put that particular problem/source of apprehension out of your mind by having it mostly sorted.
As for the moving, sorting your things out and doing what needs to be done... Either talk to your parents and ask help in defining what needs to happen and when..or tell us more about the circumstances of your move, so we might give practical suggestions

[Teddy]

The food issue at least is one that is easily sorted... Put eating in your agenda and have an alarm ring at the appropriate times, allowing time for cooking/preparation. Make a couple of meals in advance and freeze them for those times the alarm catches you without food in the pantry, or otherwise unable to produce food. Schedule at least a weekly run to the stores for groceries... And put that particular problem/source of apprehension out of your mind by having it mostly sorted.
As for the moving, sorting your things out and doing what needs to be done... Either talk to your parents and ask help in defining what needs to happen and when..or tell us more about the circumstances of your move, so we might give practical suggestions

Well, most of my stuff is already there, and I know I'll survive eventually. It's mostly just the last paragraph which warranted the post: sometimes I bar up my feelings a little too good and then realise I need to get them out somehow...

[AlexanderML]

Is this the right thread for this? I'm not sure where to put this. I feel like I have to dump it somewhere so here is some stuff that I'm feeling.

Spoiler: Lovey Stuff, yuck

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I've been feeling weird as of late. Not really the type to ever find someone I've liked (ever) to a serious degree beyond physical attraction, there is just that one girl now that keeps on popping into my head and making me sad.

I see her every Saturday for D&D, hang out for a few hours, and only text a little the rest of the time unless our group of friends wants to go out and do something else. She is just awesome, the prettiest girl I know, one of the people I can talk to for most of my problems, has a wonderful personality (except when she get's tired, then she get's a little distant), shares my hobbies (and interests me in new parts of them), and is the only girl I've know to care about me that was not a family member.

At first I was only physically attracted to her, like any other girl in my life I considered, yet that was not really anything new to me so I could ignore that. Yet as the months drew on with me seeing her time and time again, sharing fun times together with others, bad and good aspects over the whole course, I've grown to want her more and more in a deeper sense then just physical.

When she is with someone else my chest burns with jealousy (something I could not identify till I thought about it for a long while), even when she is just jokingly doing so (something she's rarely done with me, one point I say lucky man to a friend of mine). I'm afraid at how horrible it'd be to be in the same room as someone she is dating...

When she hugs me, or otherwise makes a friendly act that get's me close to her (like a hug or her asking to be picked up, putting her head on my shoulder), it's hard to not get excited, to feel a deep want to just hug her right back. I normally make a excuse to leave the room at those moments from how I don't want to think of her in the wrong way, or feel like I'm enjoying it too much.

Until just this week I've been fine with all this, been able to ignore all this and numb my feelings towards her. Now that is getting more and more difficult. I'm able to just throw away all those feelings for a time, but they just keep on coming back! It's painful, and awkward for me to be near her like that.

I cannot even come out and tell her how I feel because I know that she'd reject me. I'm not really that great, but putting that aside, she's in a relationship at the moment (that she's just gotten into). I can just see how she'd kindly put me down, and I'd have lost my chance.

Just ranting, and telling others here makes me want to do it less in RL. Getting this all out here makes that little fire in my chest *poof* for now, which feels awesome.

[TechnOkami]

Spoiler: @AlexanderML

Show

Well, you seem to know pretty well where you are in that situation.

If she stays in that relationship with whoever she's with you really can't do much about it.

But, in the case that she stops seeing that person, I personally would jump onto that chance faster than a cat running towards the opening of a can of tuna. (I was trying to think of something wittier, really I was, but nothing came to mind.)

Unless you really know her, how she acts, her interests, and how she would react to you asking her out, you bluntly don't know what her decision would be. If given the chance, you should ask her out. The resolution you will get from asking her out will be so much sweeter than not taking that risk. And hey, even if she doesn't accept your offer, at least you made the attempt. The two of you, at the very least, can be good friends.

Anywho, good luck dude.

-TechnO

[Comrade]

Made a really stupid mistake and now I'm gonna take the hit for it. Whoops.

[DataNinja]

Made a really stupid mistake and now I'm gonna take the hit for it. Whoops.

Do you feel like sharing? Or venting?

[Comrade]

Do you feel like sharing? Or venting?

Was meant to pay for and sign up for an online homework service for a class of mine that I've been attending for three or four weeks now, and I just... didn't. Too much **** going on, too much on my mind, simply didn't get around to it until now. And of course, I've missed several assignments as a result. Not much to vent about: I made a really dumb mistake that I shouldn't have.

[DataNinja]

Was meant to pay for and sign up for an online homework service for a class of mine that I've been attending for three or four weeks now, and I just... didn't. Too much **** going on, too much on my mind, simply didn't get around to it until now. And of course, I've missed several assignments as a result. Not much to vent about: I made a really dumb mistake that I shouldn't have.

Ouch that sucks. I hate when life is all "Here, let me throw everything at you at once! Catch!"

[Lycunadari]

Not really looking for advise (though if you do have helpful ideas, please share), but kind words are appreciated.

Spoiler: health stuff

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You might remember my last post here mentioning my joint pain. It’s gotten worse.
In early August, I was at my GP to do another blood test for my vitamin d levels (they were better, but still a bit low, so still have to take supplements) and I mentioned my joints hurting often, but not very badly. Doctor immediately suspected lyme disease (especially because I had a lot of tic bites as a child) and had me tested for that. The tests were positive, so I had to take antibiotics for 4 weeks and she referred me to a rheumatologist. So I took my antibiotics, but the pain didn’t get better at all - it got worse, and was accompanied by muscle pain and fatigue. I was still hopeful then, cause treating Lyme often causes a worsening of symptoms at first (something about the dying bacteria releasing toxins). But then the four weeks were over (mid September) and I still wasn’t feeling any better. Luckily that was all during the summer holidays, so I could just spend most of the time in bed/on the couch (though I had to learn for an exam, which was hard with being in pain and exhausted all the time).
At the start of October I finally got to see the rheumatologist, and he doesn’t think it’s Lyme at all - he says my symptoms sound more like some sort of connective tissue disorder/autoimmune disease, though he didn’t say what specifically it could be. I don’t know how knowledgable he is about Lyme - he thinks if it was Lyme, the antbiotics should have helped, but I’ve read that there are cases where for unknown reasons the symptoms persist after treatment, especially in the later stages of the infection.
Anyway, he ordered a bunch of blood tests done (lyme again, and for autoimmune stuff I think, he did’t tell me, but 7 vials, so I guess he wants a lot tested), did some physical examination stuff and asked me some questions, but didn’t do anything to actually /help/ me. Next appointment is in a week, so maybe I’ll get some answers then.
Meanwhile, I’ve been feeling worse and worse every day. I’m in pain almost all the time now, I sleep 10+ hours a day and am still tired (to the point where I can’t concentrate at all, and can’t see properly if I sleep less than 10 hours because i have 8am lectures).I’m feeling totally overwhelmed by uni stuff, I have to take the bus to uni because biking hurts too much, I’ve given up playing the violin because I don’t have the energy and just thinking about visiting family or doing stuff with friends stresses me out. I feel like my whole life is falling apart, and all this stress is obviously not good for my mental health either. I probably should try to see my therapist again, but that’s just another thing I don’t have time/energy for.
And if all this is really caused by an autoimmune illness, it’s not going to get much better and I somehow have to learn to live with a chronic illness at the ripe old age of 21 years.

[JNAProductions]

Not really looking for advise (though if you do have helpful ideas, please share), but kind words are appreciated.

Spoiler: health stuff

Show

You might remember my last post here mentioning my joint pain. It’s gotten worse.
In early August, I was at my GP to do another blood test for my vitamin d levels (they were better, but still a bit low, so still have to take supplements) and I mentioned my joints hurting often, but not very badly. Doctor immediately suspected lyme disease (especially because I had a lot of tic bites as a child) and had me tested for that. The tests were positive, so I had to take antibiotics for 4 weeks and she referred me to a rheumatologist. So I took my antibiotics, but the pain didn’t get better at all - it got worse, and was accompanied by muscle pain and fatigue. I was still hopeful then, cause treating Lyme often causes a worsening of symptoms at first (something about the dying bacteria releasing toxins). But then the four weeks were over (mid September) and I still wasn’t feeling any better. Luckily that was all during the summer holidays, so I could just spend most of the time in bed/on the couch (though I had to learn for an exam, which was hard with being in pain and exhausted all the time).
At the start of October I finally got to see the rheumatologist, and he doesn’t think it’s Lyme at all - he says my symptoms sound more like some sort of connective tissue disorder/autoimmune disease, though he didn’t say what specifically it could be. I don’t know how knowledgable he is about Lyme - he thinks if it was Lyme, the antbiotics should have helped, but I’ve read that there are cases where for unknown reasons the symptoms persist after treatment, especially in the later stages of the infection.
Anyway, he ordered a bunch of blood tests done (lyme again, and for autoimmune stuff I think, he did’t tell me, but 7 vials, so I guess he wants a lot tested), did some physical examination stuff and asked me some questions, but didn’t do anything to actually /help/ me. Next appointment is in a week, so maybe I’ll get some answers then.
Meanwhile, I’ve been feeling worse and worse every day. I’m in pain almost all the time now, I sleep 10+ hours a day and am still tired (to the point where I can’t concentrate at all, and can’t see properly if I sleep less than 10 hours because i have 8am lectures).I’m feeling totally overwhelmed by uni stuff, I have to take the bus to uni because biking hurts too much, I’ve given up playing the violin because I don’t have the energy and just thinking about visiting family or doing stuff with friends stresses me out. I feel like my whole life is falling apart, and all this stress is obviously not good for my mental health either. I probably should try to see my therapist again, but that’s just another thing I don’t have time/energy for.
And if all this is really caused by an autoimmune illness, it’s not going to get much better and I somehow have to learn to live with a chronic illness at the ripe old age of 21 years.

*Hugs*

You said you didn't want advice, which is good-I have no idea what advice I could even give. I really hope the doctors are able to figure out what's the issue and fix it, though. In the meantime, good luck with school!

[sktarq]

So.. Today the thoracic surgeon I have been seeing called. He had me do a full range of tests last week. Apparently the tests seem to indicate that the diagnosis of sarcoidosis...
It's all a bit scary.

You okay over there with all this. . . .week long stays in the hospital seem excessive for a biopsy. . . hoping results have been good to you?

Not really looking for advise (though if you do have helpful ideas, please share), but kind words are appreciated

Did the doctor look closely at your skin, how you skin stretched when pulled on and/or joint flexibility?

[dehro]

You okay over there with all this. . . .week long stays in the hospital seem excessive for a biopsy. . . hoping results have been good to you?

Thanks for asking and the support. I didn't reply sooner because I haven't had much to report, really.
In the end I got to the hospital only yesterday.
It's actually a proper operation, with full anesthesia and with surgeons and all.I just had it this morning and am still in bed with oxygen and so on,working the sleepy stuff out of my system.actual results won't be in for at least two weeks. I'll be home, if all goes well, by Friday tops,possibly sooner

[Lycunadari]

Did the doctor look closely at your skin, how you skin stretched when pulled on and/or joint flexibility?

He poked me a bit with a tooth pick and cold/warm things, presumably to test for missing sensitivity, but otherwise he didn't pay close attention to my skin. He looked if I could reach the floor with my hands while bending over (I can't) and if I can touch my forearms with my thumbs (I can't), but that was all in regards to flexibility. You're thinking of EDS/hypermobility syndrome, right? A friend suggested that as well - my fingers are a bit hypermobile, as are my knees (I think, I'm not sure what is considered normal) and maybe other joints as well. I'm not sure how stretchy skin is supposed to be, either.
My personal theories right now are EDS, some sort of dysautonomia, or lupus/SLE. But that's all just vague ideas, obviously.


@dehro: good luck, I hope you'll get good news soon!

[sktarq]

Yes I was thinking EDS -and all the myriad/horrible ways it can present itself. Of the seven types the most commonly checked one is type one which is checked for (in part) by stretching the skin. Many docs skip/ignore the other types (which leads to EDS being deeply misdiagnosed here esp as fibromialgia).

In the meantime good luck - be careful with stretching/yoga (it is good for some joint/connective tissue issues and can make others worse)-if you want to run it by your doc first. Also recommend investing in a trackball and/voice command protocol systems for your computer. When systematic joint issues attack your hands-daily life can get hard fast-protecting them from things that may cause carpal tunnel is a decent stand in (usually) because you want to protect and baby them along.