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  1. - Top - End - #241
    Orc in the Playground
     
    GreenSorcererElf

    Join Date
    Aug 2015
    Location
    Cloud cuckoo land
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You get a rebel helmet.

    I insert a liquid that is almost, but not quite, entirely unlike tea.
    I am a Neutral Good Elf Druid/Wizard

    : "Disintegrate. Gust of wind. Now can we please resume saving the world?"
    : "Your approval fills me with shame."
    Never, EVER pick up a duck in a dungeon!

  2. - Top - End - #242
    Orc in the Playground
     
    BlueWizardGirl

    Join Date
    Mar 2016
    Location
    Sewer maze

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You get a cup that is almost, but not quite, entirely unlike a teacup.

    I insert a laugh track.
    Spoiler
    Show


    Gone like the wind.

  3. - Top - End - #243
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    jkhero73's Avatar

    Join Date
    May 2016
    Location
    \_(ツ)_/
    Gender
    Intersex

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You get canned laughter. Like, laughter, inside of a can.

    I insert a bad font that hurts to read.
    Tomorrow is the future, but time isn't real.

    Heads up: I don't care what pronouns you use for me as long it's not 'it'.

    Who reads signatures anyway?

    Quote Originally Posted by HalfTangible View Post
    You botch your roll.
    "Which one?"
    Yes.

  4. - Top - End - #244
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    WhiteWizardGirl

    Join Date
    Dec 2014

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    Quote Originally Posted by jkhero73 View Post
    I insert a bad font that hurts to read.
    You are invited to a lecture series on the history of typography. One of the lectures is titled "Can Comic Sans MS be Saved?"

    You insert A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius.

  5. - Top - End - #245
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    BardGuy

    Join Date
    Feb 2016
    Location
    Latveria
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You get Burn before reading: 1001 great put-downs by history's shining wits.

    I insert a subordinate clause.

  6. - Top - End - #246
    Orc in the Playground
     
    BlueWizardGirl

    Join Date
    Mar 2016
    Location
    Sewer maze

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You get an angry employee.

    I insert the Lost Mines of Phandelvar adventure.
    Spoiler
    Show


    Gone like the wind.

  7. - Top - End - #247
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Libro's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jan 2016
    Location
    Korprulu sector
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You get a thank-you note from the gnomes for their new break room activity.


    I insert a scroll of Meteor Swarm.
    "Ye are who ye are on all o' yer days. All o' em. Includin' that worst an' tha best. Ev'ry single one counts. All tha way ta tha end."

    Recently returned from an extended hiatus.
    Spoiler: Extended signatures
    Show
    Both of the following are not up-to-date, but will be in the next few weeks.My Homebrew.
    Extended Signature.

    War Doctor avatar by linkele.

  8. - Top - End - #248
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Prince Zahn's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Location
    my fireball can reach you
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You get a novelty gun that, upon pulling the trigger, functions as a cigarette lighter.

    I insert an Apology note for not having something interesting to offer, as well with 1d100 boxes of candy.
    Last edited by Prince Zahn; 2016-07-21 at 06:43 AM.
    Quote Originally Posted by The_Jette View Post
    If you write gibberish in common, even comprehend languages won't turn it into a sonnet.
    P.Z. - gamer; friend; royalty. 'Tis a pleasure.
    <<Cynthia the Witch by me. she's a nice gal, I promise!

    My player Resume, for potential DMs to read over.


    My Extended Signature

  9. - Top - End - #249
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    GuesssWho's Avatar

    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    Far Realm
    Gender
    Female

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You get 1d100 apology notes.

    I insert a wendigo.
    Cthulhu fhtagn R'lyeh!
    Quote Originally Posted by Nerd-o-rama View Post
    There were other programs that were deleted, but they either go quietly or spend the rest of their existence sitting around babbling about causality. Smith's different. He gets deleted and he's like "Hell no, I'm staying. And I'll steal your kernel privileges and spam copies of myself onto every last thing on the hard disk. How d'you like that?"
    Degeneration 91
    Homebrew:
    Anglermaids

    Wendigo Race
    -Complicated Wendigo Race
    False Hydra (Goblin Punch)

  10. - Top - End - #250
    Orc in the Playground
     
    BlueWizardGirl

    Join Date
    Mar 2016
    Location
    Sewer maze

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You get a scared child hiding under the bed covers.

    I insert a refrigerator magnet.
    Spoiler
    Show


    Gone like the wind.

  11. - Top - End - #251
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Libro's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jan 2016
    Location
    Korprulu sector
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You get one of those magnetic cranes used in junkyards.


    I insert a rather angry ancient blue dragon.
    "Ye are who ye are on all o' yer days. All o' em. Includin' that worst an' tha best. Ev'ry single one counts. All tha way ta tha end."

    Recently returned from an extended hiatus.
    Spoiler: Extended signatures
    Show
    Both of the following are not up-to-date, but will be in the next few weeks.My Homebrew.
    Extended Signature.

    War Doctor avatar by linkele.

  12. - Top - End - #252
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Lex-Kat's Avatar

    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    Avvie by HappyTurtle
    Gender
    Female

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You get a happy baby orange-tiger kitten.

    I insert a handful of sunflower seeds.

    Lexington III, my Brute. Inner Circle. ! Melody


  13. - Top - End - #253
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    5a Violista's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Location
    Next to the Mandolinist

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    Over the next ten minutes, half-chewed sunflower husks are spit out of the vending machine.

    I, on the other hand, insert lyrics to a new song.
    Last edited by 5a Violista; 2016-09-03 at 04:55 PM.
    Favorite sports:
    Fencing
    Football (Soccer)
    Figure Skating
    (and basically everything else that starts with 'f')
    ALSO! Come roleplay FFRPG in the Nexus!
    Nexus Characters.

  14. - Top - End - #254
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Prince Zahn's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Location
    my fireball can reach you
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    you get sued for copyright infringement.

    I insert a Chaotic-good lawyer.
    Quote Originally Posted by The_Jette View Post
    If you write gibberish in common, even comprehend languages won't turn it into a sonnet.
    P.Z. - gamer; friend; royalty. 'Tis a pleasure.
    <<Cynthia the Witch by me. she's a nice gal, I promise!

    My player Resume, for potential DMs to read over.


    My Extended Signature

  15. - Top - End - #255
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    GreenSorcererElf

    Join Date
    Aug 2016
    Location
    Definitely Somewhere

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You get a Lawful Evil blue-collar worker.

    I insert the Monster Manual.
    The Greatest Threads Of GiantITP (in my opinion):
    A story of the exact wrong way to run a campaign.
    The best thread derailment of all time.
    The "canonical" list of Mostly Useless Magic Items.
    A ridiculous campaign.
    Weird dreams.

    Working on a laptop connected to the Internet is like writing on a typewriter welded to a circus. -Unknown

    My Nexus character

  16. - Top - End - #256
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    jkhero73's Avatar

    Join Date
    May 2016
    Location
    \_(ツ)_/
    Gender
    Intersex

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You get all the monsters in the manual. All of them.


    I insert the Undertale Trash Bin with me inside of it.
    Tomorrow is the future, but time isn't real.

    Heads up: I don't care what pronouns you use for me as long it's not 'it'.

    Who reads signatures anyway?

    Quote Originally Posted by HalfTangible View Post
    You botch your roll.
    "Which one?"
    Yes.

  17. - Top - End - #257
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Lex-Kat's Avatar

    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    Avvie by HappyTurtle
    Gender
    Female

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You get you back. Sorry, we don't accept you as payment.

    I insert a pair of oversized bat wings.

    Lexington III, my Brute. Inner Circle. ! Melody


  18. - Top - End - #258
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Dire Moose's Avatar

    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Location
    Arizona
    Gender
    Intersex

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You get an oversized bat.

    I insert a Triceratops.
    LGBTitp
    Genderfluid AMAB, hence the gender symbol. I switch as it suits me.

  19. - Top - End - #259
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    Generic-Guy's Avatar

    Join Date
    Aug 2016
    Location
    Somewere

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You don't get anything, but somewhere, someone named Elan is happy.

    I insert me, trying to ride a bike indoors of the machine.

  20. - Top - End - #260
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    jkhero73's Avatar

    Join Date
    May 2016
    Location
    \_(ツ)_/
    Gender
    Intersex

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You get spit back out with a broken bike. The gnomes are very upset that you broke their water cooler.

    I insert a new water cooler.
    Tomorrow is the future, but time isn't real.

    Heads up: I don't care what pronouns you use for me as long it's not 'it'.

    Who reads signatures anyway?

    Quote Originally Posted by HalfTangible View Post
    You botch your roll.
    "Which one?"
    Yes.

  21. - Top - End - #261
    Orc in the Playground
     
    BlueWizardGirl

    Join Date
    Mar 2016
    Location
    Sewer maze

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You get a cold glass of water and a thank-you card from the gnomes.

    I insert a snow globe.
    Spoiler
    Show


    Gone like the wind.

  22. - Top - End - #262
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Lex-Kat's Avatar

    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    Avvie by HappyTurtle
    Gender
    Female

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You get an angry Ice Elf, who slaps you in the face and runs away.

    I insert a butterfly.

    Lexington III, my Brute. Inner Circle. ! Melody


  23. - Top - End - #263
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Prince Zahn's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Location
    my fireball can reach you
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You get a golden toad. Take good care of it, okay?

    I insert a buffalo.
    Quote Originally Posted by The_Jette View Post
    If you write gibberish in common, even comprehend languages won't turn it into a sonnet.
    P.Z. - gamer; friend; royalty. 'Tis a pleasure.
    <<Cynthia the Witch by me. she's a nice gal, I promise!

    My player Resume, for potential DMs to read over.


    My Extended Signature

  24. - Top - End - #264
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Libro's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jan 2016
    Location
    Korprulu sector
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You get an angry buffalo, and a letter from the gnomes saying that buffalo are not an acceptable form of payment.


    I insert a tin of delicious cookies for the gnomes, along with a note asking the gnomes if I can come inside to examine their wondrous machine.
    "Ye are who ye are on all o' yer days. All o' em. Includin' that worst an' tha best. Ev'ry single one counts. All tha way ta tha end."

    Recently returned from an extended hiatus.
    Spoiler: Extended signatures
    Show
    Both of the following are not up-to-date, but will be in the next few weeks.My Homebrew.
    Extended Signature.

    War Doctor avatar by linkele.

  25. - Top - End - #265
    Orc in the Playground
     
    GreenSorcererElf

    Join Date
    Aug 2015
    Location
    Cloud cuckoo land
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You get a tray of gnomish cookies, all of which have "NO" spelled on them in chocolate chips. Still delicious, though.

    I insert a tengu thief.
    I am a Neutral Good Elf Druid/Wizard

    : "Disintegrate. Gust of wind. Now can we please resume saving the world?"
    : "Your approval fills me with shame."
    Never, EVER pick up a duck in a dungeon!

  26. - Top - End - #266
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    jkhero73's Avatar

    Join Date
    May 2016
    Location
    \_(ツ)_/
    Gender
    Intersex

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You get a bloody and broken tengu thief along with a note that says "Nice try."


    I insert the Lorax. (He speaks for the tees.)
    Last edited by jkhero73; 2016-09-06 at 10:23 AM.
    Tomorrow is the future, but time isn't real.

    Heads up: I don't care what pronouns you use for me as long it's not 'it'.

    Who reads signatures anyway?

    Quote Originally Posted by HalfTangible View Post
    You botch your roll.
    "Which one?"
    Yes.

  27. - Top - End - #267
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    Generic-Guy's Avatar

    Join Date
    Aug 2016
    Location
    Somewere

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    I he also get kicked out. He brocke the watercoller whit the pot of a pottet plant to put the plant on the watersource.

    I insert a bunch of empty 'thank you'-cards. They clearly running out of it. And one filled out for the amuseing therad.

  28. - Top - End - #268
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Cuthalion's Avatar

    Join Date
    May 2012
    Location
    California
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You get a bundle of empty "You're welcome" cards.

    I insert all my old memories of when I lived in SMBG. *crosses fingers*
    Spoiler: Quote(s)
    Show
    Quote Originally Posted by Temotei View Post
    You're my favorite.
    Quote Originally Posted by Kneenibble View Post
    I'll kill them! I'll kill all of them!
    Quote Originally Posted by FinnLassie View Post
    We're crashing Wombat's wedding! WITH AN ARMY OF WOMBATS AND BUDGIES.


    "So whosoever is a hedgehog let him see to it that his wife is a hedgehog also, and so forth."

  29. - Top - End - #269
    Orc in the Playground
     
    BlueWizardGirl

    Join Date
    Mar 2016
    Location
    Sewer maze

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You get a Pensieve that you can use to relive those memories.

    I insert $42.
    Last edited by Black Socks; 2016-09-06 at 03:38 PM.
    Spoiler
    Show


    Gone like the wind.

  30. - Top - End - #270
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    Generic-Guy's Avatar

    Join Date
    Aug 2016
    Location
    Somewere

    Default Re: D&D Vending Machine XXVIII: Output not guaranteed

    You got a single Coke, only 0,2l...

    I insert jkhero73. AGAIN!

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