LGBTAI+ #58 Infinity 2.0: The Darth Arminius Apology Thread

[Lentrax]

I feel I could use a lot of hugs about now...

*hugs*
*more hugs*

[Jormengand]

*hugs*
*more hugs*

*Cuddles*
*More cuddles*.

Hihi Lenlen. How've you been?

[Lentrax]

Better now I have a Jor to cuddle.

[Grytorm]

*Offers Jormengard a polite pat on the back*

[Sobol]

*Hugs everyone who needs a hug*

*Courteously offers to scratch somebody behind their ears*

Mind telling us chess-newbies about the Gambits?

A gambit is when at the beginning of the game you sacrifice a piece (usually, a pawn), but get some compensation for it - your other pieces become more mobile, you get a position which is more comfortable for you than for your opponent, etc.

In the Halloween Gambit, White sacrifices a knight and starts a fierce attack on Black.

In the Englund Gambit, Black sacrifices their king's pawn and get a position which is rather unusual for most Whites and contains some traps. It's good for blitz tournaments, when White doesn't have much time to think.

[Jormengand]

*Courteously offers to scratch somebody behind their ears*

Meow! : 3

[TaiLiu]

A gambit is when at the beginning of the game you sacrifice a piece (usually, a pawn), but get some compensation for it - your other pieces become more mobile, you get a position which is more comfortable for you than for your opponent, etc.

In the Halloween Gambit, White sacrifices a knight and starts a fierce attack on Black.

In the Englund Gambit, Black sacrifices their king's pawn and get a position which is rather unusual for most Whites and contains some traps. It's good for blitz tournaments, when White doesn't have much time to think.

Oh, I see now.

[JNAProductions]

Spoiler: Yay!

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Thanks to all of you for helping me make it to this point. It's not over, but I'm glad I made it here.

*High fives Comrade*

Awesome!

[Lissou]

So happy for you! Grats!

[Phae Nymna]

Hey, Hi, Hello everybody! It's been a very long time––years now, I think––since I've posted here. Long enough that I don't recognize most of the names posting. I just want to pop in to tell you all that you are loved, that I am here for you, and that you must march on and fight the good fight. I'll go back to lurking for a bit but know that you are better than no other and no other is better than you.

[Ravens_cry]

Spoiler: Yay!

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Thanks to all of you for helping me make it to this point. It's not over, but I'm glad I made it here.

"Is it not a strange fate that we should suffer so much fear and doubt for so small a thing? So small a thing!"
Regardless, congratulations on the newest portion of your journey!

[Dire Moose]

Spoiler: Yay!

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Thanks to all of you for helping me make it to this point. It's not over, but I'm glad I made it here.

I'm glad you made it this far, and we're all very proud of you. Now bottoms up!

also, nice use of that LOTR quote, raven's_cry.

[Kneenibble]

Hey, Hi, Hello everybody! It's been a very long time––years now, I think––since I've posted here. Long enough that I don't recognize most of the names posting. I just want to pop in to tell you all that you are loved, that I am here for you, and that you must march on and fight the good fight. I'll go back to lurking for a bit but know that you are better than no other and no other is better than you.

I'd know that tush anywhere.

[TaiLiu]

I'd know that tush anywhere.

Kneenibble!

[Kneenibble]

Kneenibble!

Hello, Thai Lily.

[golentan]

Hello, Thai Lily.

Hallo kneebiter. How have you been?

[Heliomance]

Kneenibble!

Nibbler of knees! Haven't seen you around for ages!

[Asmodean_]

I feel I could use a lot of hugs about now...

*Has no idea of what's going on but offers hugs regardless*

[Heliomance]

Now it's time for... Bitch About Charing Cross! With your host, Heliomance!

Last appointment a month ago. Was told I'd be being referred for surgery. Haven't received a copy of the referral letter yet. Just phoned up to ask what's going on. Apparently they're currently processing letters from April.

Why the hell do they have a two month backlog on typing up freaking letters?! My entire life plan is basically on hold until surgery happens - I'm still living with my parents mostly so I can have my convalescence in a house with a nurse (my mum) living in it. I'm 27, I want to get on with my life, and these endless delays are driving me mad! It's been three years since I was first referred, can't I just be done already?

[Jormengand]

*Has no idea of what's going on but offers hugs regardless*

Pfft, like you'd ever hug me!

But nah, situation has been resolved (sorta) and I guess I'm feeling better now, so thanks to those offering hugs.

Yeah, even you.

[TaiLiu]

Hello, Thai Lily.

Hey, Kneenibble. How's life treating you?

[Togath]

So some... Some stuff has sorta come up(transition and HRT related, spoilering since it's sort of sex life related).

Spoiler: Stuff

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After looking more in HRT and talking to a few trans friends, I've become hesitant to look into it.
While I do identify as female, and would like a more feminine looking body, I also have no dysphoria over my masculine genitals, and in fact don't want them to change... Which, from everything I've heard, they would, even on low doses of HRT(is it worth seeing if a doctor/therapist might know of an HRT method that doesn't affect them?)
Can anyone here offer more information? Do any other trans girls/androgynous people/gender fluid folks here have feelings like I do, where they want to be able to maintain the functioning of their masculine genitals?
I've read(a lot) that HRT causes them to shrink, makes it harder to get erections, reduces sex drive and ability to get aroused, reduces fertility/renders you sterile(along with turning your semen clear), and can dramatically increase your odds of cancer unless your have an orchiectomy, which are all negatives for me.

[Heliomance]

On a happier note, I got dressed up nice a few weeks ago - have some photos!

Spoiler

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[Eldest]

So some... Some stuff has sorta come up(transition and HRT related, spoilering since it's sort of sex life related).

Spoiler: Stuff

Show

After looking more in HRT and talking to a few trans friends, I've become hesitant to look into it.
While I do identify as female, and would like a more feminine looking body, I also have no dysphoria over my masculine genitals, and in fact don't want them to change... Which, from everything I've heard, they would, even on low doses of HRT(is it worth seeing if a doctor/therapist might know of an HRT method that doesn't affect them?)
Can anyone here offer more information? Do any other trans girls/androgynous people/gender fluid folks here have feelings like I do, where they want to be able to maintain the functioning of their masculine genitals?
I've read(a lot) that HRT causes them to shrink, makes it harder to get erections, reduces sex drive and ability to get aroused, reduces fertility/renders you sterile(along with turning your semen clear), and can dramatically increase your odds of cancer unless your have an orchiectomy, which are all negatives for me.

Spoiler: Tangental to Sex Stuff

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Harder to get errections: a bit but not nearly as bad as feared.
Reduced sex drive: very much yes. Mind you, I still most certainly have a sex drive. It's just not as... loud?
Reduced ability to get aroused: oh no. I can still get horny af, it just generally happens less and more often because of partners/me actively initiating something.
Reduced fertility: yup! That's actually a plus for me since having a child terrifies me (I'm going to adopt). Sperm freezing is a possibility if you want biological children.
Increased odds of cancer: never heard of this one. I'll look over the literature I have but I don't think it was in there.

[Dire Moose]

On a happier note, I got dressed up nice a few weeks ago - have some photos!

Spoiler

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Oh wow. You are truly beautiful, Heliomance.

[JNAProductions]

Looking sharp, Helio. :)

[Togath]

Spoiler: Tangental to Sex Stuff

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Harder to get errections: a bit but not nearly as bad as feared.
Reduced sex drive: very much yes. Mind you, I still most certainly have a sex drive. It's just not as... loud?
Reduced ability to get aroused: oh no. I can still get horny af, it just generally happens less and more often because of partners/me actively initiating something.
Reduced fertility: yup! That's actually a plus for me since having a child terrifies me (I'm going to adopt). Sperm freezing is a possibility if you want biological children.
Increased odds of cancer: never heard of this one. I'll look over the literature I have but I don't think it was in there.

Spoiler: Stuff

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It still sounds like something I'd probably not want...
Which, from what I've read so far, seems to primarily leave me surgery or not transitioning at all.
edit: But I shouldn't give up hope. I should seek out a doctor specializing in nonbinary gender stuff and ask them if there is some obscure third option

[Grytorm]

Well, I feel kind of depressed again. Not to bad, but still. The worst part is that I'm reimagining songs to match my mood. Not really the worst part. But annoying.

(Every day I'm a suffering suffering. and Today I'm just not doing anything.)

[Togath]

Since I've been curious... What is wanting SRS/GRS/At least an orchiectomy like? Like, I've never had any problems with having masculine "parts" despite identifying as a girl... Which made me curious what it is like for transgirls who have enough dissatisfaction to want to take surgical measures to change things(which is not to say I find that kinda stuff odd, it's just something I have been curious about).

I've also been curious if anyone here has had experience with other types of feminizing surgeries, and what the procedures and recovery are like?(since I have considered them for making the non "parts" parts of my body more feminine).

[Heliomance]

It's kinda really hard to explain. It's like trying to explain the concept of "blue", it just doesn't really translate into words that well.