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Thread: Edible Monsters

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    Default Edible Monsters

    I'm currently running a game where one of the PCs is a barbarian chef. What monsters are edible and probably tasty? What special bonuses might eating certain monsters give someone?
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    Default Re: Edible Monsters

    Gorgon meat might be very similar to beef, if you get past the metal. Similarly, cockatrice meat could be very chickeny. Both could give bonuses against petrification.

    Wyverns, Shambling Mound Heart root, Stirges, Rust monsters, Owlbear, griffons, gricks, ettercap, dinosaurs, bulette, and Ankheg are all possible meals.
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    Don't fail to consider complicated recipes. Oozes might not be a great food on their own, but they could be combined! Here is a recipe for Aboleth Aspic:

    2 cups Black Pudding
    1 tbsp Dryad nectar
    2 tbsp lemon juice
    2 tbsp Salamander blood
    1 tsp horseradish
    1 cup celery, chopped
    1 cup scallion, chopped
    1/2 cup green bell pepper, chopped
    1 cup dragon turtle meat (may substitute merrow or mermaid flesh)
    1 cup Aboleth tentacles, diced
    1 cup mayonnaise, for frosting and to taste
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    Default Re: Edible Monsters

    Always wanted to play a demented cook that eats ALL his enemies, be they orcs, his own race or a Dire bear. :) maybe a halfling with sharpened teeth prob stout for poison resistance so you are more tolerant of all the foul stuff you eat! :D

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    There is a manga called Dungeon Meshi that's literally all about this, and I highly recommend checking it out. Plus after they cook a monster, they have a recipe plus nutritional info!
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    Default Re: Edible Monsters

    Just about ANYTHING is edible if you're desperate / crazy enough. As for tasty, well, I hear dragon meat's a delicacy. And I can imagine that each particular breed of dragon has its own little flavor differences. Reds might be spicy, whites might be minty, blacks and greens might be sour...
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    Default Re: Edible Monsters

    They are all edible. Even the appendices.

    Especially the appendices.

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    Quote Originally Posted by JumboWheat01 View Post
    Just about ANYTHING is edible if you're desperate / crazy enough. As for tasty, well, I hear dragon meat's a delicacy. And I can imagine that each particular breed of dragon has its own little flavor differences. Reds might be spicy, whites might be minty, blacks and greens might be sour...
    I think blues would be sweet. As a more arid dragon, they have likely adapted many of the water-storage adaptations of animals in drier climates. Zebra, for example.
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    Trolls! The never-ending food supply! Just cut off a chunk of meat and by the time you're ready for your next meal, it will have grown back!

    (I can think of some moderately-gruesome things I'd do as a DM to someone who started eating troll flesh. In fact I can imagine making this part of the troll's official reproductive cycle.)
    Last edited by MaxWilson; 2016-07-16 at 04:09 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by MaxWilson View Post
    Trolls! The never-ending food supply! Just cut off a chunk of meat and by the time you're ready for your next meal, it will have grown back!

    (I can think of some moderately-gruesome things I'd do as a DM to someone who started eating troll flesh. In fact I can imagine making this part of the troll's official reproductive cycle.)
    Just BBQ the chunk before eating, that stops the regenerative process of trolls after all. :)

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    Almost as a rule, I expect most mythical creatures to be the most delicious. Angels and Unicorns, for example; evil guys might like eating them, and tell me that doesn't make you hate them more. These might even give you unnatural powers? But also probably draw a lotttt of ire.

    Dragons also seem delicious.

    Basilisk meat probably isn't bad. I would imagine it's just meat, though. No effects. Maybe something special if you eat the eyes.

    Chuul might be like lobster. I know a few people who would just need some butter with one of those things. But they are weird, kinda magical creatures, so maybe eating a Chuul could temporarily give you its ability to sense magic?

    I'm sure some Slaad would be a nice starter, although maybe eating too much risks infection with Chaos Phage.

    When you're low on the good stuff and need more filler, I imagine Mimic meat would suffice.
    Last edited by LaserFace; 2016-07-16 at 05:07 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Geostationary View Post
    There is a manga called Dungeon Meshi that's literally all about this, and I highly recommend checking it out. Plus after they cook a monster, they have a recipe plus nutritional info!
    Damn, I was gonna say this too.

    They say crocodile meat tastes similar to that of chicken, so I suppose that the meat of dragons tastes sorta like chicken too. Only more spicy, as though it's already been spiced up.
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    Default Re: Edible Monsters

    Quote Originally Posted by MaxWilson View Post
    (I can think of some moderately-gruesome things I'd do as a DM to someone who started eating troll flesh. In fact I can imagine making this part of the troll's official reproductive cycle.)
    But your stomach acids would deal damage to the troll, thereby negating it's regeneration and killing it (most monsters deal acid damage when swallowing PCs).

    I would imagine myconids to taste quite good.
    Last edited by Belac93; 2016-07-16 at 07:33 PM.

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    Default Re: Edible Monsters

    Kobold tastes like chicken.

    Giant lizard tastes like alligator which tastes like fishy chicken unless you do it right.

    Dragon is either inedible or tastes like arrogant chicken.

    Orcs taste like green, gamey human which tastes like gamey pork

    Kraken taste like calamari and make for excellent takoyaki.

    Veggiepygmies are either toxic or make excellent tempura.

    There's a race of dumb, singing mushroom "people" that are fond of (bad) mimicry that taste excellent with butter.

    Per Dilbert, the best part of unicorn is the horn.

    Quote Originally Posted by LaserFace View Post
    Chuul might be like lobster. I know a few people who would just need some butter with one of those things. But they are weird, kinda magical creatures, so maybe eating a Chuul could temporarily give you its ability to sense magic?

    I'm sure some Slaad would be a nice starter, although maybe eating too much risks infection with Chaos Phage.
    Lobster-locust, I'd wager. Possibly with a jelly section.

    Slaadlegs are the only worthwhile part to eat.
    Last edited by Coidzor; 2016-07-16 at 07:49 PM.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Belac93 View Post
    But your stomach acids would deal damage to the troll, thereby negating it's regeneration and killing it (most monsters deal acid damage when swallowing PCs).
    (1) Stomach acid? What stomach acid? It's not in the stat block. There are a few monsters such as krakens and purple worms that have stomach acid, but I don't see any such thing listed for PCs.

    (2) Something has to be pretty deadly before it can deal even one HP of damage. Bleach may be acidic from a chemical standpoint in real life, but in D&D terms it probably doesn't even do 1 HP of damage per round unless you get it in your eyes or swallow it.

    (3) Try eating troll at my table and find out if your theory is correct. Or if you're more evil, try feeding troll to the kender and watch what happens.

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    Quote Originally Posted by MaxWilson View Post
    (I can think of some moderately-gruesome things I'd do as a DM to someone who started eating troll flesh. In fact I can imagine making this part of the troll's official reproductive cycle.)
    Ah, yes, trolls, the monsters that are such wusses their primary means of reproduction is being eaten by other creatures.

    That's as silly of an idea as someone wanting to eat troll, so at least it fits from that angle, I suppose.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Coidzor View Post
    Ah, yes, trolls, the monsters that are such wusses their primary means of reproduction is being eaten by other creatures.

    That's as silly of an idea as someone wanting to eat troll, so at least it fits from that angle, I suppose.
    It's silly up until you find the iron cages full of children who were force-fed troll polyps by a Mama Troll in order to incubate them with chestbursters.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LsD6AL3HJtM
    Last edited by MaxWilson; 2016-07-16 at 08:26 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Coidzor View Post
    Ah, yes, trolls, the monsters that are such wusses their primary means of reproduction is being eaten by other creatures.
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    Default Re: Edible Monsters

    Quote Originally Posted by MaxWilson View Post
    (1) Stomach acid? What stomach acid? It's not in the stat block. There are a few monsters such as krakens and purple worms that have stomach acid, but I don't see any such thing listed for PCs.

    (2) Something has to be pretty deadly before it can deal even one HP of damage. Bleach may be acidic from a chemical standpoint in real life, but in D&D terms it probably doesn't even do 1 HP of damage per round unless you get it in your eyes or swallow it.

    (3) Try eating troll at my table and find out if your theory is correct. Or if you're more evil, try feeding troll to the kender and watch what happens.
    (1)Of course PCs don't have stomach acid listed. Unless humans in your world have very different eating methods than humans in our world, they do have stomach acids to help break down and digest food.

    (2) If our stomachs did not have a protective lining, the acids would eat through them in about a minute. Get that stuff in your eyes and tell me it isn't harmful when your tissues are submerged in it. Also, 1 hit point of damage per round is all it takes. Trolls regenerate at a rate of 10 hit points per round, negated if they take acid or fire damage. So, they would be taking about 1 damage a round until they got to 0.

    (3)I suppose a raw piece of troll could probably grow quite large before it even reached your stomach, and quite possibly get stuck. After a few hours, it would burst out of your chest or throat. A cooked troll, however, I think would be edible. Probably very oily and fatty, but edible.

    But, what you do at your table is your business. I'm just giving my view.

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    Default Re: Edible Monsters

    A round is 6 seconds, and a commoner has 4 HP. I don't think a commoner wouldn't faint from being covered in stomach acid for 24 seconds.

    But of course it's the DM's job to cover this stuff.

    My personal view is that individual body parts of a troll don't regenerate (otherwise "loathsome limbs" wouldn't even exist), and that only the main body (the body part including the heart, for instance) can actually heal itself on its own.

    BTW I think troll meat would taste horrible. Rubbery and slimy, smelling faintly of ammonia.
    Last edited by Gastronomie; 2016-07-16 at 08:52 PM.
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    If you season them right, Gnomes are really tasty. Serve them with a nice red wine to bring out the flavor.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Giant2005 View Post
    If you season them right, Gnomes are really tasty. Serve them with a nice red wine to bring out the flavor.
    Number one food choice of Beholders and Bullettes, IIRC.

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    Quote Originally Posted by MaxWilson View Post
    It's silly up until you find the iron cages full of children who were force-fed troll polyps by a Mama Troll in order to incubate them with chestbursters.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LsD6AL3HJtM
    That does get a bit grimdark, but I'd be a bit worried about stepping on hags' toes at that point, and it's a far cry from having the ranger's pet get asploded for using its bite attack or what have you.

    Although come to think of it, I'm reminded of a discussion about a bit of fluff text from a Baldur's Gate era D&D video game where a troll regenerated from the biggest piece of itself left, the one inside some cat that got the part the adventurers missed while burning it.
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    Default Re: Edible Monsters

    Given that the barbarian has a good alignment, I don't think it's very likely that he'll eat sentient beings, like dragons, orcs, or trolls.

    The "eat a Chull to temporarily gain its ability to sense magic" idea seems cool, I'm probably going to use it. Thank you, LaserFace!
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    Quote Originally Posted by TurboGhast View Post
    Given that the barbarian has a good alignment, I don't think it's very likely that he'll eat sentient beings, like dragons, orcs, or trolls.
    I could see an evil druid hippy awakening sentience in all manner of creatures just to mess with that barbarian. Ooh, what fun a fight like that would be, hungry, hulking barbarian versus scheming, shapeshifting druid.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Coidzor View Post
    Orcs taste like green, gamey human which tastes like gamey pork
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    I'm guessing google
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    Quote Originally Posted by 2D8HP View Post
    Please don't tell how you found that out!
    What? Nothing wrong with eating pork. Unless you've got religious issues with it, I guess.

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    Quote Originally Posted by MaxWilson View Post
    What? Nothing wrong with eating pork. Unless you've got religious issues with it, I guess.
    ...I wonder how much like pork a wearboar tastes like.
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    Getting off the subject of lycanthropic cannibalism, apparently the cave fishers, from the Fifth Edition Foes book, are very edible for about a day after death. Of course, that book's statblocks are a headache...
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    Default Re: Edible Monsters

    Any of the fungus monsters or bird monsters would be good places to start

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