The Genie from Aladdin shows up and offers you 3 wishes. What do you do?

[Traab]

It could be argued that he Monkey pawed Jafar's third wish.

"I wish to be a powerful genie myself!"

"Okay, enjoy being trapped in a lamp forever!"

The sequels and animated series establish that free genies are both a thing and they keep the majority of their power once freed. There was no specific reason to make Jafar a bound genie.

Didnt genie lose power by being freed? Since jafar wanted to be the most powerful genie ever then he had to be enslaved. It MIGHT be a bit monkey paw but it was his direct wish. You cant be the most powerful genie without being a slave to the lamp as well. Had he just wished to be a genie and still gotten enslaved then yeah, monkey paw. *EDIT* Also, if you watch the film clip of his third wish, the genie didnt even get where aladdin was going with the setup. So this wasnt a deliberate trick on his part either way.

[Shivore]

1: Elven style longevity (as seen in Lord of the Rings). That gets around the problems of never dying... I could still die and inevitably would, but it would likely take centuries barring any particularly unfortunate accidents or malice.

2: I wish to win the lottery. Typical wish for money isn't very good... the IRS is going to want to know where you got it from. But a lottery win? That is plenty of money, especially if wisely invested to secure future returns, and doesn't open yourself up to difficult questions.

3: Set the genie free. Obviously, anything else would just be rude!

[Grey Watcher]

Eh, I've read way too many stories about this sort of thing going Horribly Wrong, even when you're dealing with a Benevolent Genie (ie one that will honor the intent of your wish, rather than just using some technicality in the wording to screw you over). So I would wish:

1) "I wish to forgo my second wish."

3) "I wish you free."

[Friv]

I mean, presuming it's an Aladdin-style Genie, I'd probably want to chat with him for a while. He was pretty up for spending several days or a couple of weeks hanging around, so if he was up for it as a non-command, that would be pretty cool. Just the insight from all of history that he'd seen!

After that, the classic three.

#1 - Wish to be the sole winner of the next major lottery in my country. It's not Powerball-huge, but it's a few million dollars and that makes me comfortable for my life without messing up the economy.

#2 - Wish to be physically and mentally healthy and fit for the rest of my natural lifespan.

#3 - Free the genie, because if he's the genie from Aladdin then while we've been talking I've been assuring myself that he's not going to go on a murder-rampage or anything.

I mean, the first two pretty much set me up for life, and I can do the rest myself. I could check with him if "removing all the pollutants humanity has added to the world in the last century" is within his capabilities. If it is, that might have to replace Wish #1.

[Donnadogsoth]

A few posters have said they'd free Genie with a wish. But the power of the wish comes from Genie himself, not from the wisher. Why can't he just free himself? Also, isn't Genie granting three wishes to the person who already freed him?

[Traab]

A few posters have said they'd free Genie with a wish. But the power of the wish comes from Genie himself, not from the wisher. Why can't he just free himself? Also, isn't Genie granting three wishes to the person who already freed him?

Magic has limits. Just like how he cant kill anyone or make them fall in love, he cant free himself unless he is granting a wish. Until then he is forever bound to the lamp. Phenomenal cosmic power, itty bitty living space. And while bound to the lamp, he is bound to grant three wishes to anyone who rubs it. Thats just how the aladdin style genies work.

[Donnadogsoth]

Magic has limits. Just like how he cant kill anyone or make them fall in love, he cant free himself unless he is granting a wish. Until then he is forever bound to the lamp. Phenomenal cosmic power, itty bitty living space. And while bound to the lamp, he is bound to grant three wishes to anyone who rubs it. Thats just how the aladdin style genies work.

If that's the case then I would consider making my first wish that he be freed. Then I would ask him, not wish but just ask him, hoping he will answer truthfully and sagaciously out of gratitude, what would be the best use of my remaining two wishes, given my goals.

[Traab]

If that's the case then I would consider making my first wish that he be freed. Then I would ask him, not wish but just ask him, hoping he will answer truthfully and sagaciously out of gratitude, what would be the best use of my remaining two wishes, given my goals.

If you free him I dont think he would owe you any wishes anymore. He is no longer bound to the lamp. Im not saying he wouldnt hook you up, he probably would. But he no longer owes you them. Of course, thats just theory as noone ever freed the genie as their first wish before.

[Rater202]

According to an episode of Aladdin: The Series, in which Genie's Lamp was stolen, free genies literally can't grant wishes.

[golentan]

Wish One: I would like to have magical ability to alter the morphology and biochemistry of living things with their consent.
Wish Two: Sure, I wish you are free.
Wish Three: Look, I know you're not bound to the whole wishing thing because of wish two, but I wish you'd grab dinner with me and my friends. You seem like you'd have a lot of interesting stuff to talk about. Gimme a call about it sometime.

[Grek]

The recipe for a medicine which is universally effective against viral disease.
The recipe for a material which exhibits superconductivity at the boiling point of water.
And then ask Genie if he'd like for me to wish for anything in particular.

[siati]

3: Set the genie free. Obviously, anything else would just be rude!

EDIT:

Oh, the Genie from Aladdin. Nevermind!

I've seen this in video games. It usually doesn't end well for the person setting them free..

1. To own a tiny house on wheels!

2. To not die early but not live so old that I'm senile, or I guess age well?

3. To go back in time and prevent Water World from being created

[Durzan]

I think I will take a page from one of the previous posters with at least one of these wishes.

1. I wish that upon the completion of my third wish, and provided that the genie does all in his power to fulfill my other two wishes in as benevolent a way as possible and to the best of his ability, he shall be set free from this lamp, but will remain a close and trusted friend whom shall remain in frequent contact with me, and whom I can call upon for assistance anytime when needed, and the genie can likewise do so of me.
2. I wish to be the most powerful sorcerer in the universe, have easy access to all possible magical knowledge, be unable to die of old age, poison, or disease... to remain in perfect health and top physical condition for the rest of my life, and to have the intelligence and wisdom equal to those of the wisest and most intelligent beings in the universe.
3. I wish that this wish and the previous two wishes granted by this genie will be inherited by all my descendants, provided they prove themselves worthy of these great gifts by living a selfless and charitable life; The genie will be granted authority over this matter, and should he deem one not worthy, he can transfer their powers to another of his choosing, provided they meet the conditions of living a selfless and charitable life.

Congrandulations, I just created a race of extremely wise, intelligent, and powerful demigods... in just 3 wishes. With the added bonus of the Genie being a friend and companion to me and my descendants for eternity.

[Rogar Demonblud]

Companion, maybe. But since you've just enslaved him to serve and shepherd you and your family for as much of eternity as they'll occupy, I doubt he'll by any more of a friend to you than is included in the magical compulsion that enslaves him.

Anyway, add me to the list of people who doubt they'd make a wish. I'm pretty well screwed up by my early childhood, and I'm pretty sure adding magical wish power to that isn't going to be good for anyone or anything, including the property values. But if the genie is willing, we can start writing books based on the wishes granted in the past and the ways they gone wrong (comedy, horror, maybe kiddie-lit Aesops) and sell those. I'd even give the guy authorial credit and an even split of the profits if so desired.

[Grinner]

I would free the genie with my first wish. That's all. There are many things I want, and many things that others want that I think ought to be granted, but I don't think magic wishes are the right way to go about it.

You haven't seen Wishmaster, have you?

[Durzan]

Companion, maybe. But since you've just enslaved him to serve and shepherd you and your family for as much of eternity as they'll occupy, I doubt he'll by any more of a friend to you than is included in the magical compulsion that enslaves him.

Note the wording in all three of my wishes. First off, I would do all in my power to earn that friendship. I did just free him from the lamp, so thats got to count for something... (I choose to be optimistic about the first wish.) Apart from the wishes I gave him, he is free to do as he pleases.

Second off, I deliberately made the ability to call upon him for aid a two way street. He can do the same of me and my family members as well... and I and my offspring would be bound to help him, even as he is bound to help us. When you consider the fact that an Aladdin-style genie's power is significantly reduced once he's set free, I believe that this is a fair and mutually beneficial trade... the only real problem I could see with this, is my children calling him for aid over trivial things and annoying him like crazy. Him sheepherding my family also gives him a significant say in what happens to them. After all, he can deem any of my offspring unworthy, and transfer their power to someone he thinks would use the powers more appropriate.

[Rogar Demonblud]

Not a chance. Those powers only go to your descendants, and they get it automatically until revoked. So the genie isn't transferring that power to anyone, because they only people the genie can transfer the power to already has it (or had it and lost it). It's straight revocation.

[danzibr]

3. To go back in time and prevent Water World from being created

This made me literally lol.

I don't think this is within the genie's powers, but I always thought if I had one wish, I'd wish for omnipotence. Like, just will something and it happens. Then you can take care of the rest of the wishes.

[Traab]

This made me literally lol.

I don't think this is within the genie's powers, but I always thought if I had one wish, I'd wish for omnipotence. Like, just will something and it happens. Then you can take care of the rest of the wishes.

If omnipotence doesnt work, you could always wish for the power set including full control over it, of Franklin Richards. Dude is a reality warper with massive psionic abilities. If its not omnipotence, its close enough, as the guy is on par with skyfather tier gods like odin and has defeated celestials.

[Arutema]

Maybe I'm thinking to small here, but:

1) Wish to have all my teeth back and whole.
2) Wish to be immune to disease.
3) Saved for a rainy day.

[Quild]

It could be argued that he Monkey pawed Jafar's third wish.

"I wish to be a powerful genie myself!"

"Okay, enjoy being trapped in a lamp forever!"

The sequels and animated series establish that free genies are both a thing and they keep the majority of their power once freed. There was no specific reason to make Jafar a bound genie.

Genie didn't made this on purpose. Aladdin tricked Jafar into wishing that while Genie thought it was a terrible idea to give such idea to Jafar.

If I break a bone and wish to have no bones so it won't happen again, I'm dead. That's not monkey paw, just how i

Wish One: I would like to have magical ability to alter the morphology and biochemistry of living things with their consent.

If I understand correctly, you're wishing for an almost absolute healing capacity with polymorphism.

Getting that kind of ability would also be my first wish.
- I could get immortality with that (also it solves the evolution problem that was mentioned before)
- I won't feel sad anymore when I see some people who could benefit of a magical healing because medecine can't help
- I would easily get all the money I need/want from that power
- I could probably pretend to be a prophet of some kind and try to solve religious conflicts... But I'm convinced that some people wouldn't go for it and it may worsen things. Better be careful with that.

Biggest downsides of that wish:
The ability to alter morphology and biochemistry doesn't mean that you can do it properly. If you see someone with a broken arm, will you just be able to heal his arm by just thinking at it? Or do you need strong medical knowledge (like Trafalgar Law in One Piece)?
I'm completely unable to draw (or describe...) the face of someone that I have in front of me. Can I do proper plastic surgery on it?
If I want to be 3 inches taller myself, can I manage to do it without altering my shape in a monstruous way?
If the wish is monkey pawed, this clearly need to be covered. But even if it isn't, it should be mentionned that this power must work in a very intuitive way.

Other big downside:
If you get to use it, you probably won't stay secret very long. Be prepared to a certain fame. And then... demands.
Because really, if you have this power and it's known, everyone will have his idea of how you should be using it, even if it must take years. It's not like if you need to sleep!

Also there would be articles about you with titles like "All doctors hates him, read why!". If you're too effective, you'll ruin their job. Moreover, it would become less important to do researches in order to fight diseases, because you're here. If you happen not to be here anymore, science may have do a few steps backward in that domain.

[IShouldntBehere]

I wish for Qrbrbbztqrtmllvg as defined in this document:

The document reads


Qrbrbbztqrtmllvg is when the following things occurt ={
~lots of stuff here, immortality, invulnerability, eternity of space to exist in, be really good looking.. yadda, yadda~
}

Barring that I'd wish for Omnipotence. Barring that I'd wish for "The greatest degree of magical control over the universe and myself you are able to grant me without making me a slave to a magical lamp or other object, in other words the most-genie like powers possible without the terrible upsides of being genie.

Then also I guess to free Genie.

[georgie_leech]

From a certain Harry Potter Fanfic:

"Excuse me," said Jasmine. "Aladdin, my darling, you're cute but you're an idiot, do you know that? Did you not notice how once Jafar got his hands on this lamp, he got his own three wishes - oh, never mind. Genie, I wish for everyone to always be young and healthy, I wish nobody ever had to die if they didn't want to, and I wish for everyone's intelligence to gradually increase at a rate of 1 IQ point per year." She tossed the lamp back to Aladdin. "Go back to what you were doing."

[Pyromancer999]

My three wishes:

1. For the following aspects of my re-occurring dream world(meaning, a world I see in my dreams), to be real.

Spoiler: Spoiler because it's Long and also Weirdly Detailed for a Dream

Show

Basically, everyone has access to an extradimensional space with the following features:

• Size: Starts off with a 100 ft radius when born, radius increases by 10 ft per year lived
• Extradimensional space is customizable in all aspects, so long as they can be found in nature(so no weird insanity pocket realms), with the exception of whatever dwelling they have within the space
• Anyone can magically build a house with whatever layout they want within this space so long as it makes use of common materials for building
• Any land present is eternally farmable, and crops are always healthy and large
• The extradimensional space produces a soylent-like(as per the health food product, not the stuff made from people) food product daily, in quantities able to sustain the dweller
• Dwellings come with and re-stock basic amenities(soap, shampoo, very basic set of clothes, etc.) and utilities (electricity, water, internet with an okay connection).
• People can combine spaces together to form group/family homes. This is the default state for children and their parents until age 18, when it becomes optional
• No acts of violence towards another living being may take place within this space, nor can one use this space for other criminal activities(storing stolen goods, etc.). If this occurs, all access is revoked as soon as the the attempt to commit the act is made, for a long period of time, with sharp increases in the length of time leading towards permanent expulsion for repeated offenses
• Spaces are rooted in a specific physical location(such as a city, town, or other community), so if one travels, they must find lodging outside of this space. One may change their specified physical location whenever they like, but may not do so again for another two weeks.
• One must be outside of their space for at least four hours a week, even if it is in a community.

Also, people can form extradimensional communities, which start off with a radius of 5 miles, but can be extended by the community members contributing their own space. People can travel straight from their personal spaces to whatever community they belong to. Admission to communities cannot be denied, and all rules regarding violence and crime apply to these communities. All members are immediately whisked away to their personal space if they are at risk of lethal harm from someone in these places.

So on the whole, mainly grants a basic level of living without hunger for a lot of people.

2. For all humans to be in the peak of health for their entire natural lives, which would result in effective elimination of disease, as well as most likely longer lifespans, as they would be less affected by the stresses (mental and physical) one has to bear throughout life. Also has the bonus side effect of eliminating mental disorders if mental health is included in that definition.
3. The existence of an afterlife if one does not exist, or if it does, teleportation.

Not the best or most original set of wishes, but alright enough.

From a certain Harry Potter Fanfic:

"Excuse me," said Jasmine. "Aladdin, my darling, you're cute but you're an idiot, do you know that? Did you not notice how once Jafar got his hands on this lamp, he got his own three wishes - oh, never mind. Genie, I wish for everyone to always be young and healthy, I wish nobody ever had to die if they didn't want to, and I wish for everyone's intelligence to gradually increase at a rate of 1 IQ point per year." She tossed the lamp back to Aladdin. "Go back to what you were doing."

Eeeeh.Not that I don't agree with the sentiment and good intentions here, but you'd get a lot of overpopulation issues, although then maybe people would die because they don't want to still be starving for an eternity? Also, if El Goonish Shive is any indication, living forever and forever increasing intelligence is a recipe for insanity, especially given the human brain can only store so much information. For an example of that in popular science fiction, just look at Me from Doctor Who. She lives forever, but her brain can only remember so much, so she becomes a different person every lifespan's worth of time that passes by.

[Traab]

On the plus side, they can choose to die whenever they want to, and will eventually become smart enough to realize that they really should die if they dont want to go crazy.

[Durzan]

Not a chance. Those powers only go to your descendants, and they get it automatically until revoked. So the genie isn't transferring that power to anyone, because they only people the genie can transfer the power to already has it (or had it and lost it). It's straight revocation.

ahem... "the genie will be granted authority over this matter, and should he deem one not worthy, he can transfer their powers to another of his choosing, provided they meet the conditions of living a selfless and charitable life."

I worded it specifically that way so he could transfer the powers to someone not of my line. All I specified about those whom he can transfer the powers to were "of his choosing" which means that it isn't held to the same familial lines... again, provided the person lives a selfless and charitable life.

[Pyromancer999]

On the plus side, they can choose to die whenever they want to, and will eventually become smart enough to realize that they really should die if they dont want to go crazy.

Fair enough. Although, also, everybody means EVERYBODY. So say hello to the worst dictators and the like alive remaining around. Additionally, insanity isn't necessarily guaranteed, although memory loss would be. If mental health isn't included in that package, imagine an immortal sociopathic criminal that stays alive, experiencing the thrill of their first act of harm again and again over the ages. They could even torture somebidy to death, as it would be possible to torture somebody, in a situation akin to that of Prometheus, with the forever young and healthy wish. Also on that note, how young would that be? 5? 10? 15 for eternal puberty-induced nightmare?
Even 25 wouldbe a bit odd, as you'd have people 100+ years older than you looking the same. So keep track of your family tree unless you want to accidentally make out with your great-great-great aunt or someone of similar or bit more closely related to you. You'd also have hundred year olds creeping on people a quarter their age, although that is not necessarily different from real life, but seems like it would simehow be more weird.

Even ignoring that, consider the anarchy that could ensue, as there is no reason to fear prison time if you'll live forever, nor the military or any other authority if they cannot restrain rebels forever.

[Ravens_cry]

Hmm, perfect shapeshifting, faster than light travel being feasible, and immortality with a self destruct mechanism.

[Aliquid]

I find it interesting that everyone here is thinking of the Disney version of the story rather than the original.

I would prefer the original story's genie... he may have been terrifying to look at, boring in personality, and had no interest in conversation, but he gave unlimited wishes

[Douglas]

I find it interesting that everyone here is thinking of the Disney version of the story rather than the original.

I would prefer the original story's genie... he may have been terrifying to look at, boring in personality, and had no interest in conversation, but he gave unlimited wishes

But did he have nearly no limits on what those wishes could be, and did he grant them as intended without any attempt to twist them around for negative consequences? Those two attributes are central to this thread's premise.