What's your favorite headcanon?

[Fri]

As already pointed out earlier in this thread, supes most efficient use of his time would be producing cheap energy for the world, but instead he prefers to go around punching petty criminals and smashing Lex's latest innovations.

Even if you claim "But Lex wants to use his super tech to conquer the world!", then would you rather we still be using stone tools and praying for a good weather or die of starvation instead of somebody developing metalworking, even if they intend to use such metal working to try to conquer the world with swords and armor?

The worst offender may be poor Peter Parker. His web shooters are nothing short of revolutionary tech, and he explicitly can mass-produce them out of cheap common materials since he isn't rich like Bruce or Tony. Yet he keeps their tech a close guarded secret. It's not like they're even a super dangerous weapon, but would do miracles for all sort of engineering fields and rescue forces and whatnot.

https://www.smbc-comics.com/?id=2305

There you go.

[Rogar Demonblud]

So I archive binged the thread today (and why not), and I have the perfect title for that limited series on the work life of Bruce Wayne, corporate executive. Day Job, Knight Job.

And according to Wikipedia, Mr. Freeze's surname is evidently spelled Fries (which I've never understood why that's pronounced "freeze" rather than "frys").

Because it's pseudo-German, and therefore has the same pronunciation as bier and flieger.

[deuterio12]

Not just kryptonian, how many alien races have the justice league dealt with? How much random tech has been captured from those invasions, or even from various time travelers? Honestly, there may be a legit reason to not toss this stuff onto the open market. Think star treks prime directive and why they made it. They sent out plans for advanced tech to every world they could locate and some destroyed themselves with stuff they werent civilized enough to use. So sure they could give us cold fusion, but within a year some tinpot dictator or terrorist will turn it into a country destroying bomb. Or use genetic engineering meant for treating all sorts of medical conditions to create their own set of augments, or some other eugenics based insanity.

Well, we already have nuclear bombs and managed to don't blow ourselves up, so consider me optimistic. Transhumanists would be all over genetic engineering. Heck, in the old days cutting dead bodies to study them was deemed blasphemous, but nowadays doctors cut living people open to cure them and are highly respected for that.

Plus, all that tech would allow for humanity to actually start colonizing other planets and precisely minimize the chances we're wiped out by some planet-busting super weapon. Why should the kree and xiar and whatnot get all the fun?

And also, that would do a great job of proving lex's point. With all this incredible alien tech being handed out like candy, what reason do humans have to grow and evolve? They will be a generation or two away from even being able to attempt to innovate or improve on this stuff because its leapfrogging every field we currently have. Earthlings would probably turn into the humans from wall-e because they no longer need to do anything with all this future tech to provide for them.

I believe the main difference would be precisely the presence of aliens to compare with. Many humies wouldn't resist the lure of proving they're better than the xenos scum, others would line up to emigrate, others would just want to do tourism over all those fancy planets.

And if Mass Effect is anything to go by, humies would want to stay in shape for nothing else to score with alien chicks.

But nope, supes crushes all the fancy tech that would allow that, keeping humanity crawling in the ground.

[khadgar567]

Well, we already have nuclear bombs and managed to don't blow ourselves up, so consider me optimistic. Transhumanists would be all over genetic engineering. Heck, in the old days cutting dead bodies to study them was deemed blasphemous, but nowadays doctors cut living people open to cure them and are highly respected for that.

Plus, all that tech would allow for humanity to actually start colonizing other planets and precisely minimize the chances we're wiped out by some planet-busting super weapon. Why should the kree and xiar and whatnot get all the fun?



I believe the main difference would be precisely the presence of aliens to compare with. Many humies wouldn't resist the lure of proving they're better than the xenos scum, others would line up to emigrate, others would just want to do tourism over all those fancy planets.

And if Mass Effect is anything to go by, humies would want to stay in shape for nothing else to score with alien chicks.

But nope, supes crushes all the fancy tech that would allow that, keeping humanity crawling in the ground.

okay is any of you gents think you use that dozen mind control tech lying around the bang all babes in the justice league. I will admit i use it to bang black fire and let starfire and nightwing to finaly marry along with bruce and selina that tech is to dangerous which might be luthor's subconscious goal as his greed keeping him in check from ruling milk-way galaxy as his devotion to kill supes littraly keep earth safe from wack jobs like him.

[S@tanicoaldo]

Ok so this is my Cthulhu Mythos head canon.
I have a paradoxical relationship with Lovecraft, I’m big fan of the Cthulhu Mythos, but I much prefer the lore behind the stories than Howard’s writing itself.

Outside the dream cycle the only story I really love is “at the mountain of madness” I love that fact that such an advanced and scientific race such as the elder things was defeated and doomed by a stupid but highly adaptable inferior slave race, and that fact that awesome idea will echo throughout my entire take on how the Great Old Ones works in my views.

To a casual observer the great theme in Lovecraft’s work is that we are insignificant and the Great Old Ones are so powerful, gigantic and cosmic they are not evil per se, they are just too superior to even acknowledge our existence, we are to them as ants are to us.

My reading is that such view is superficial if you actually read his works it shows that the great old ones are more than aware of our existence and in my headcanon they are actually obsessed with us.
My head canon is that we are the true eldritch abominations, we are corrupting and driving these ancient extradimensional beings mad.

Take the Outer God Nyarlathotep for exmeple, in the books he’s cleary malign and perverted ebing who enjoys the suffering and the death of humans, he’s a satan like creature who often disguise himself as a human to trick, mislead and corrupt mortals to violent and nefarious ends.

Take the Elder Gods and theGreat Race of Yith who often save and help humanity against the others.

Take Dagon and the deep ones who make deals and build families with humans.

Take Yog-Sothoth who is outsmarted by a human wizard, had sex and a son with a human and often enter in contact with occultists.

Take the Ghouls who elected a former human as their leader.

Take the Great Ones who actively love humans, want to be like them and to be with them, have demigod kids and run away from their duties to leave among the mortals.

Take Cthulhu himself who loves to explore and be with humans in their dreams, who was able to awake form his eternal slumber twice and in both times decided to return to it, why? Maybe the dreams of humans turn out to be a lot more interesting than reality? Perhaps he is lost in their fantasies and addicted to them, just as we are addicted to sweets, games, porn and the internet.

I could go on but I guess my point is clear, these cosmic and eldritch creatures are being corrupted by us, by our thoughts and psychic for beings so above us they don’t seem to get enough of us, they could destroy us in a second and yet they don’t? Why? Do they toy with us or are they just unable to stop thinking about us, to the point where their sanity may be lost and now they are pathetic shadows of their former selves.

Was Nyarlathotep the soul of the Outer Gods such an evil and manipulative bastard before he meet humans? Or is that humanity rubbing on him and being a bad influence? Isn’t him supposed to be cosmic and above good and evil? Are humans making him go thought his edgy teen phase? He was also outsmarted by a human, how is such a infinite eternal being outsmarted by a mere human?

Is mighty Cthulhu supposed to be sleeping all the time? Or was he supposed to be… You know… Mighty
Is Yog supposed to be outsmarted, outplayed and even impressed by a mere human wizard?

I know it’s kind of cliché but I think we are the real monsters in the end.

Also the elder sign, there are two versions of it, one is the official one the other is an eye inside a star.

There are two powerful races with elder in their names, elder gods and elder things.

I like to think that both elder signs are legit but belong to different beings.

The first more organic one belong to the elder gods.

The second star shaped one belong to the elder things who have one eye and a star shaped face.

I prefer the official Lovecraft one since that’s the closest we got of canon and I hate everything Derleth wrote but his version is much more famous and popular.

[BWR]

*snip*.

Sounds like you are, or should be, a big fan of "Haiyore! Nyaruko-san!"

[sengmeng]

Pluto can walk and talk like the rest of Mickey's friends. He's just really kinky.


Edit: also, Obi-wan didn't win because he had the high ground. He won because he knew Anakin so well. He knew pointing out a very minor tactical advantage like that would make Anakin do something reckless and arrogant, and he gained the major tactical advantage of Anakin doing something he could predict. This could only come from great insight and years of observing his opponent. He won by being a true Jedi master, not being 5 feet above his opponent.

[Bohandas]

Take Yog-Sothoth who is outsmarted by a human wizard, had sex and a son with a human and often enter in contact with occultists.

I think Yog may in many ways be in the same boat as the villain from Guardians of the Galaxy 2

[rooster707]

Edit: also, Obi-wan didn't win because he had the high ground. He won because he knew Anakin so well. He knew pointing out a very minor tactical advantage like that would make Anakin do something reckless and arrogant, and he gained the major tactical advantage of Anakin doing something he could predict. This could only come from great insight and years of observing his opponent. He won by being a true Jedi master, not being 5 feet above his opponent.

Slightly related: Padme didn’t die of a broken heart, or losing the will to live, or whatever. She died because Anakin Force choked her.

[Traab]

Slightly related: Padme didn’t die of a broken heart, or losing the will to live, or whatever. She died because Anakin Force choked her.

That doesnt make much sense either. They have bacta, they can replace limbs, they can create darth vadar cyborg suits that are walking life support systems. Yet somehow this woman dies hours after being choked? Anakin survives losing all his limbs and being set on fire until he is so well done shoe leather looks tender, and she dies hours later from being unable to breathe briefly? My headcannon is that droid was one of many plants setup by palpatine over the decades. Having knowledge of who in power is having what medical issues would be very handy after all. He sent the order to let her die. She only survived long enough on her own to give birth through sheer willpower.

[Keltest]

That doesnt make much sense either. They have bacta, they can replace limbs, they can create darth vadar cyborg suits that are walking life support systems. Yet somehow this woman dies hours after being choked? Anakin survives losing all his limbs and being set on fire until he is so well done shoe leather looks tender, and she dies hours later from being unable to breathe briefly? My headcannon is that droid was one of many plants setup by palpatine over the decades. Having knowledge of who in power is having what medical issues would be very handy after all. He sent the order to let her die. She only survived long enough on her own to give birth through sheer willpower.

I mean, your neck is important. having it crushed is badness. Having it crushed while also giving birth could conceivably be enough to kill a person.

[Traab]

I mean, your neck is important. having it crushed is badness. Having it crushed while also giving birth could conceivably be enough to kill a person.

Yeah but I just find it fishy that she was fine to give birth then died right after. And it would make sense that palpatine ordered it so he could make sure to remove anything that might turn his apprentice away from the dark side. Its why he knew she was dead even though she had been carried off by obiwan who presumably was not the type to share that info with sith lords.

[weet555]

Yeah but I just find it fishy that she was fine to give birth then died right after. And it would make sense that palpatine ordered it so he could make sure to remove anything that might turn his apprentice away from the dark side. Its why he knew she was dead even though she had been carried off by obiwan who presumably was not the type to share that info with sith lords.

A slightly different theory I have heard is that Anakin unintentional killed her using the dark force to save himself.

I'm sorry that I don't remember where I heard it form.

[Traab]

A slightly different theory I have heard is that Anakin unintentional killed her using the dark force to save himself.

I'm sorry that I don't remember where I heard it form.

Its a theory, but not a likely one. I mean, is there any proof that vader even CAN do such a thing? Or is it just a "Well, this power theoretically exists as a sith technique that was used by a sith lord at some point in the history of the novels, so maybe thats what he did!" Meanwhile, we know palpatine has contacts and spies and agents all over the republic and has been building them for decades, so him being able to arrange for amidala to die in order to complete anakins fall to the dark side seems reasonable.

[Keltest]

Its a theory, but not a likely one. I mean, is there any proof that vader even CAN do such a thing? Or is it just a "Well, this power theoretically exists as a sith technique that was used by a sith lord at some point in the history of the novels, so maybe thats what he did!" Meanwhile, we know palpatine has contacts and spies and agents all over the republic and has been building them for decades, so him being able to arrange for amidala to die in order to complete anakins fall to the dark side seems reasonable.

I think "Palpatine sabotaged Padme's droid in a highly specific and undetectable way that would trigger in circumstances it has no real way of knowing about" is actually the less likely theory here.

[Malimar]

Either the "Vader inadvertently sucked Padme's life force out to keep himself alive" theory or the "Palpatine sucked Padme's life force out to keep Vader alive" theory seems the most likely explanation to me.

[Mith]

Either the "Vader inadvertently sucked Padme's life force out to keep himself alive" theory or the "Palpatine sucked Padme's life force out to keep Vader alive" theory seems the most likely explanation to me.

Palpatine strikes me as more into Sith sorcery then Vader ever was. So I would assume the latter.

[Grey_Wolf_c]

Blocking a spell, like Lockhart tried to teach Harry in the second book, is a common move in most duels but the narration skips over it. Lucius Malfoy deflects Bellatrix's spell in the fifth book, so it's not just Lockhart BSing in front of his class.

Errr... this doesn't need to be headcanon. It is outright stated that the spell exists and Harry learns it during the fourth book when he is preparing for the third triwizard task, and uses it several times, like in the fifth during his only successful occlumency defence and in the sixth, where he uses it in DADA class against Snape.

It is also the spell the Weasley twins imbue into, IIRC, either a hat or a cloak (initially as a joke item, but when the MoM buys like 500 of them for their employees, they expand it into a whole serious DADA line).

So yes, I think it is pretty well established that there is a shielding charm that blocks spells (just not the unforgivables).

Grey Wolf

[Traab]

I think "Palpatine sabotaged Padme's droid in a highly specific and undetectable way that would trigger in circumstances it has no real way of knowing about" is actually the less likely theory here.

Except that wasnt the theory I was saying. My theory was, that palpatine had control of that hospital in secret as one of his many sources of information so he was able to basically type in "droid, let her die" Here is why it could work.

Palpatine has been working against the jedi and the republic ever since he became a sith apprentice. The primary methods of attack being subtle sabotage. Bad intel on missions, ambushes setup through third fourth and 15th parties, so on and so forth.

In order to combat both, he has been setting up spies, agents, computer hacks and viruses, etc, in every location commonly used by both.

This would include hospitals and medical treatment facilities because knowing when senators/jedi are sick or injured is very handy in a lot of ways, being able to arrange for accidents and such, even better.

He wants anakin as his apprentice, and he knows padme is the only reason anakin isnt already a sith. So he has a very good reason to make sure she is dead.

The droid wouldnt have to do anything, just not actually treat her properly because her injuries combined with childbirth means she will die. Its not like the droid has to hold a pillow over her face in front of obi wan or something. "Oh dear, the medicine I totally injected her with has done nothing! What a shame."

Obiwan doesnt exactly have a lot of time for a full autopsy. He has babies to hide, and himself to hide as well, what with the ongoing jedi purge at the time. So when the medical droid declares she died, through no fault of its own of course, he will accept it.

Palpatine receives word padme is dead, doesnt inquire about the kids. Again, he is kinda busy right now, what with seizing ultimate power and all. He has what he wanted, the girl is dead, long live darth vader.

Now, most of these are absolutely confirmed reality. There are a few assumptions, but they fit in well with the confirmed parts so I think the theory floats. At the very least, it works as reasonable head cannon.

[khadgar567]

what if padme faked her dead and buggered of from the galaxy and forced medical droid to declared her dead. and in episode 9 we see her still kicking on uncharted planet.

[Traab]

what if padme faked her dead and buggered of from the galaxy and forced medical droid to declared her dead. and in episode 9 we see her still kicking on uncharted planet.

Then I would hop into the screen like im in last action hero and stab her myself.

[S@tanicoaldo]

Sounds like you are, or should be, a big fan of "Haiyore! Nyaruko-san!"

Really? *Googles it* Err... Why is that?

[NovenFromTheSun]

The Old Ones did try to find a way to make the necrontyr immortal; unfortunately, the result of their experiments were the Halo Devices.

[sengmeng]

I like to think everyone on this thread who writes "head cannon" instead of "head canon" actually does own a cranially-mounted firearm.

[khadgar567]

I like to think everyone on this thread who writes "head cannon" instead of "head canon" actually does own a cranially-mounted firearm.

well played sir well played. (slow clap)

[Hunter Noventa]

I like to think everyone on this thread who writes "head cannon" instead of "head canon" actually does own a cranially-mounted firearm.

Obligatory XKCD

[sengmeng]

Stacy's mom is named Jenny, and her dad is Jesse.

[NovenFromTheSun]

Before Red Dwarf got a ninth season, I assumed that shortly after the end alive-Rimmer would be rescued from the ship by hologram-Rimmer.

[Mith]

Stacy's mom is named Jenny, and her dad is Jesse.

Stacy's mom is Jesse's girl, I get.

The only other thing I have is Jenny from The Kids Aren't Alright if I recall lyrics correctly

At least, I hope that's the Jenny you are referring to if we are talking Offspring references.

[2D8HP]

Some Forum patter inspired my headcanon on Stickverse Elves:

Remembering that Inkyrius and Vaarsuvius adopted their kids, my own headcannon is that with their long lifespans Elves live most of their lives without having a sex, or only a few Elves ever do, so there are few births among the Elves, maybe only Elves near the end of their long lives reproduce, and raising children is usually done by parents who adopt, or is very much a whole village endeavor?

Veldrina seems girlish, or child-like and of indeterminate gender rather than womanly to me,



and is referred to as a priestess by a Gnome, and as her by Wreccan, but that may be non-Elves assigning gender to Veldrina, and maybe she's just been away from Elves long enough that she's adopted non-Elvish ways and decided to be female.

Lirian is the only Elf who seems like a women to me,



other Elves look like they could be male or female to me.

In contrast to Veldrina, human women Beatrix "Bandana" Secundus



seems more like an adult women to me but at least one Playgrounder was suprised:

So wait, is Bandana a woman?

But yeah, I'm going with that Vaarsuvius is being a typical Stickverse Elf, and "gendered" Elves are a minority, but we really haven't seen much on Elvish ways yet other than V.





I just can't tell with the Elves, but I can other races, hence my headcannon.