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Thread: Movies you regret watching
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2017-09-17, 04:53 AM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Movies you regret watching
At least that Star Wars movie was actually a Star Wars movie, and not a generic science fiction war movie with some Star Wars specific material thrown in as an afterthought like Rogue One
I didn't see the film but from the ads it looked like it also relied heavily on black stereotypes for it's humor. Was this actually the case?Last edited by Bohandas; 2017-09-17 at 05:10 AM.
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2017-09-17, 05:12 AM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Movies you regret watching
Funny, that was completely not my experience.
I only watched it pretty recently, and I was from what I knew about it expecting a very heavy handed Lolita story. What I actually saw was made with a lot of humor. Yes, the characters are all awful people, but they weren't written in a depressing way (I'm looking at you Adriaan van Dis, I'm never forgiving you for that book I chose to read myself for high school literature). There was in fact an air of slapstick to it, it was all enlarged in a way I found pretty humorous. It helped that there were a bunch of different storylines, you never stick with one for long enough to really be taken down by the serious matter underneath. The part that's advertised as the main storyline in particular, with the married dude falling is love with his daughters high school friend, is kept much shorter than I was expecting, really lampshades how desire warps what the characters see and actually has a pretty decent conclusion. Sure, before that point the guy disrupts the lives of everyone around him, but that only happens because their lives were already broken. In some ways the shaken up broken down situation at the end is better than the eternally dragging one at the start. At least it frees up some of the characters to get on with a semblance of a life again.
I'm overall a lot less angry now that the Matrix (or The Green Mile, or Three Kings, or South Park) didn't win that Oscar. Still a little, but not as much.
I might have reacted a lot worse to it had I seen it at a younger age though, it probably helps that my situation is detached from both the younger and the older characters in the movie, or if I had seen it before my "watch all the horror" period, that might have desensitized me a little bit.
And just so I have a legitimate entry in this thread, I think the worst movie I saw recently enough to remember is Barbarian. It's violently bad in such a way that you can't enjoy it nor stop watching. It has all the worst parts of Star Wars (you'll know it when you see it, but I'd advise you not to), generic fantasy, Cold Steel commercials, bodybuilder workout videos and porn. And only the worst parts. It's not even recommendable for its so bad its good value, because it isn't. Somebody had a half decent budget and an at least partly talented crew and they decided on making something pretty close to the actual end product we got, and I hope we never find out why.
Okay, okay, the Star Wars bit is a bad ewok costume seemingly inhabited by a gungan with a medical degree. I don't want to be responsible for people watching this thing out of curiosity.Last edited by Lvl 2 Expert; 2017-09-17 at 05:31 AM.
The Hindsight Awards, results: See the best movies of 1999!
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2017-09-17, 10:03 AM (ISO 8601)
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2017-09-17, 10:04 AM (ISO 8601)
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2017-09-17, 11:18 AM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Movies you regret watching
Fantastic Beasts and Where To Find Them. I watched it with my mother and enjoyed it while watching it, but once we were on the ride back home, everything about it falls apart. Why did Tina assume that Newt's book was about hunting them and not conservation? The US Forestry Service had been around for 30 years at this point! Why do they think the amnesiacal rain will make people forget a US Senator (and likely about to announce his Presidential run) is dead. And why is Graves able to get our heroes sentenced to death with no fanfare? Ever hear of a little thing called "due process"? Sure, that kind of thing was authorize at the height of Voldemort's reign of terror, but we have no evidence that Graves is using emergency powers. For all we know, he has the final say on executions whenever he feels like.
It's the epitome of a worldbuilding fail.Avatar by Coronalwave
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2017-09-17, 03:07 PM (ISO 8601)
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Rogue One was an actually good movie and was different, and mostly made sense. Unlike TFA on all accounts.
Some, I guess. Those aren't the sort of black stereotypes we have around here so it doesn't register that much. There was mostly a bunch of anti-intellectualism, complete and utter moron jokes, fat jokes, people trying to be funny weird and just being boring and uncomfortably weird. it was recognizably an attempt at humor, even if everything but the dance scene failed miserably.
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2017-09-17, 03:09 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Movies you regret watching
Walt Disney movie on Netflix. I watched The Founder (about McDonald's) and it was really really good, then it was suggested and I wasted 2 hours of my life. Fell short for me.
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2017-09-17, 04:54 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Movies you regret watching
Minority Report. It was a decent action movie with an apparently sublime theme when I first watched it. But after a bit of thinking, and especially after a second viewing, I see several major flaws with the movie. The most glaring one is that the actions of both the protagonist and the antagonist make no sense at all.
The antagonist's plan would not work at all according to the rules established at the very beginning of the movie when the basic premise is explained (the stuff with the tamper-proof wooden balls).
The protagonist's plan is even more foolish: He is actively working to make a prophecy happen in order to prove that he he is not the subject of the prophecy! Said prophecy predicts that he will murder a man at a certain time in a certain place. The protagonist escapes from the clutches of those that want to prevent this from happening. He escapes! So what is his brilliant plan to do next? Do everything he can to get to the predicted place at that predicted time, of course! What is his plan once he gets there? I do not even know. All he has to do is lay low and do nothing for a few days. He is in perfect position to do just that. In fact, if he should do anything, he should avoid at all cost to do be at that place at that time. Yet, half the movie is about his struggle to get to that place in time. This does not even happen once, but he escapes several times and has several opportunities to prevent the prophecy from happening by doing nothing, yet he does not. Big surprise: Despite all his heroic efforts, the prophecy eventually comes to pass
What really bugs me about this movie is that few people, I have spoken with, see these glaring flaws (there are even more, but a rant about those could fill a book). The movie is generally well remembered. I have the suspicion that many people do not dare to criticize this movie because at first glance it looks quite intellectual and people do not want to look stupid by criticizing it. Yet, under that thin veil this movie is just a very, very dumb action flick. Nothing makes sense. Every scene is just a setup for the next action sequence, instead of being driven by the plot. Yet, this movie is regarded as a cinematic achievement, for featuring themes that are somewhat relevant todayLast edited by Seppl; 2017-09-17 at 05:00 PM.
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2017-09-17, 05:45 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Movies you regret watching
The Minority Report short story that it's based on works much better than the movie. If you haven't read it, try hunting down a copy.
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2017-09-17, 06:17 PM (ISO 8601)
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2017-09-18, 10:19 AM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Movies you regret watching
Well yeah. But I think a lot of the movie's problems came from taking that basic premise - particularly the ending, which is what makes the entire story hold together in the first place - and changing it to provide a more thriller/action-packed plot. The seed story itself is very solid.
On the other hand, I think Total Recall (the original) was a far better story than We Can Remember It For You Wholesale, which it was based on. So like everything, it's hit or miss.Last edited by The Glyphstone; 2017-09-18 at 10:19 AM.
NOW COMPLETE: Let's Play Starcraft II Trilogy:
Hell, It's About Time: Wings of Liberty
Does This Mutation Make Me Look Fat: Heart of the Swarm
My Life For Aiur? I Barely Know 'Er: Legacy of the Void
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2017-09-18, 11:28 AM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Movies you regret watching
I have my own issues with that movie, specifically that it manufactures a false binary with precrime - that it's either a flawless system or a constitutional nightmare - rather than a highly accurate warning system that the State could use to step in with measured preventative actions, like sending a trained official to confront them first rather than going whole-hog and convicting them of murder and tossing them in cold storage.
I will give Minority Report credit for this though - and why I don't regret seeing it personally - that it presents a fairly visually appealing and positive future with well-considered futurists elements underpinning it. Yes, it has psychics and such, but the crux of strong SF is to take the absurd and surround it with more believable elements and Minority Report does that well with its universe -- if not story and characters. While Dick's Minority Report is, well... par for the course as far as his settings go.
Yeah, but We Can Remember It For You Wholesale was only a few pages and is basically just a fairly long joke... which is why the remake's claim that it was going to be following the source material more than the original was so confusing.
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2017-09-18, 10:00 PM (ISO 8601)
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Ghost Story - This is your stereotypical, overindulgent, pretentious art film. Like I love art films and indie films. But god damn it, I don't know if it's the horrible pacing or the presentation of unoriginal nihilistic themes. Like I felt this movies length like within the first 30 minutes. I mean Casey Affleck as a bedsheet ghost with no dialog or movement or acting is funny for like 15 minutes but then it just gets depressing, but not in an emotional way either, because the movie doesn't give you anything to be emotionally invested in other than perhaps to relate your own mortality and thoughts to the situation, but the thing is it still tries to present some sort of watered down 'character arc' that's stretched over something that is way longer than it should be.
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2017-09-20, 03:11 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Movies you regret watching
Ooooh, someone posted about The Usual Suspects and Fight Club in a "plot twists you loved" thread, and that reminded me.
The Usual Suspects and Fight Club. God, I hated those. And then I had to read the Fight Club book for an English class. One of the few times I can definitively say the movie was better than the book, and I hated the movie.Cuthalion's art is the prettiest art of all the art. Like my avatar.
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2017-09-20, 03:46 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Movies you regret watching
I highly recommend not reading any of Chuck Palahniuk's other books, took me 3 tries to figure this one out (Fight Club, Survivor & then Haunted (shudder)), and Fight Club is his least disturbing work by a looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong shot. He writes well, but ho-boy is it gag-inducing in subject matter.
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2017-09-20, 03:59 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Movies you regret watching
"If you want to understand biology don't think about vibrant throbbing gels and oozes, think about information technology" -Richard Dawkins
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2017-09-20, 04:47 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Movies you regret watching
Cuthalion's art is the prettiest art of all the art. Like my avatar.
Number of times Roland St. Jude has sworn revenge upon me: 2
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2017-09-20, 04:51 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Movies you regret watching
I've read some excellent stuff in english class. Just off the top of my head:
- Macbeth, Hamlet, Othello
- The Odyssey
- A Hullabaloo in the Guava Orchard
- Things Fall Apart
- Chronicle of a Death Foretold
- Crime and Punishment
That's from high school alone, and there were some good ones before (not after, although that's more because I never took a college literature class than anything; I have read some books on the curriculum of some of these classes that were solid).I would really like to see a game made by Obryn, Kurald Galain, and Knaight from these forums.
I'm not joking one bit. I would buy the hell out of that. -- ChubbyRain
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2017-09-20, 05:04 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Movies you regret watching
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2017-09-20, 05:39 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Movies you regret watching
Cuthalion's art is the prettiest art of all the art. Like my avatar.
Number of times Roland St. Jude has sworn revenge upon me: 2
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2017-09-20, 06:34 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Movies you regret watching
Alien: Covenant. A lot of dull moments, very cliche plot. Just another Alien movie...
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2017-09-20, 07:55 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Movies you regret watching
"If you want to understand biology don't think about vibrant throbbing gels and oozes, think about information technology" -Richard Dawkins
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2017-09-21, 01:59 AM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Movies you regret watching
I read The Hobbit for English class.
By that time I had already read both The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings in Dutch, because back then I still read thick books for pleasure, so it was redundant if anything.
I also remember how much less well put together I found the story having already read Lord. Hobbit almost seemed a bit childish at that point.
Then again, I do not remember any of the big action scenes Peter Jackson found when he read it, so maybe I just remember it wrong.The Hindsight Awards, results: See the best movies of 1999!
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2017-09-21, 09:40 AM (ISO 8601)
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2017-09-21, 02:11 PM (ISO 8601)
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“Evil is evil. Lesser, greater, middling, it's all the same. Proportions are negotiated, boundaries blurred. I'm not a pious hermit, I haven't done only good in my life. But if I'm to choose between one evil and another, then I prefer not to choose at all.”
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2017-09-21, 11:27 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Movies you regret watching
From Dusk Til Dawn. I saw the last ten minutes or so one time and thought "wow, I've gotta see the rest of this movie". Big mistake! Turns out those last ten minutes are the only part of the movie where anythig actually happens, what precedes is an hour and a half of pure tedium
"If you want to understand biology don't think about vibrant throbbing gels and oozes, think about information technology" -Richard Dawkins
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2017-09-22, 02:54 AM (ISO 8601)
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Re: Movies you regret watching
Interestingly, when my friend first ran to me with huge smile on his face because there was going to be Hobbit movie - specifically, 3 movies each around 3 hours, I took the book from a shelf, where it stood for past 12 years or so... and asked him, what is going to be in the third part. As a joke, I theorized that it will be battle of five armies, from viewpoint of every participant, including several orcs, in 3D and with slo-mo.
I'm sorry.
I regret watching Running Man.
I read the book and the same friend who told me about Hobbit movie told me there was a movie! Since I was young and naïve, I thought: "Nobody can ruin this book!".
Cue Ahnold.
I don't mind Conan the Barbarian with him. But I hated Running Man.Call me Laco or Ladislav (if you need to be formal). Avatar comes from the talented linklele.
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2017-09-22, 03:41 AM (ISO 8601)
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Really? Because I love that movie. The ending if anything is my least favorite part, where the story kind of falls apart and they just throw more vampires at it. It's still possibly the only movie where they manage to use a significant amount of nudity without bringing the plot to a screaching halt and making me hate the sexy scenes. That alone is an accomplishment. I also love the group dynamic of the core 5 characters. And the opening scene, I'm a sucker for opening scenes, that's why I'm such a Luc Besson fanboy (nothing to do with this movie). I'm such a big fan I even made my way through the two sequels and season one of the series, which mostly just follows the cues of the movie at a much slower pace, without actively disliking them.
So to each his/her own I guess.The Hindsight Awards, results: See the best movies of 1999!
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2017-09-25, 12:16 PM (ISO 8601)
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I was totally that guy who didn't know it was going to be a vampire movie. I was getting pretty into the whole kidnapping story, and then things just went crazy and switched to a completely different genre. I guess it was fun, but I still wanna know how that kidnapping story was gonna go if not for the vampires.
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2017-09-26, 10:36 AM (ISO 8601)
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Really every Quentin Tarintino film except Kill Bill has been regrettable for the same reason as From Dusk Til Dawn they all have one or two really good scenes that draw me in and make me watch it and then I when I watch the film I realize I've already seen everything in the movie worth watching during those clips or previews I saw and that most of the movie is just filler.
The most egregious example is Death Proof which had no worthwhile scenes at all but I watched because it was part of a double feature with Planet Terror
EDIT:
I have a similar problem with Will Ferrell movies. If you've already seen the fight scene from Anchorman (and the scene that i,mediately follows it) there's no reason to watch the rest of the film, because while those two scenes are great, thay're the only good scenes in the entire movieLast edited by Bohandas; 2017-09-26 at 10:43 AM.
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