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  1. - Top - End - #271
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    Default Re: Movies you regret watching

    Quote Originally Posted by BWR View Post
    Star Wars The Force Awakens. What a depressingly bad start to Disney SW movies. Not that the movie wasn't good, it's just that it was a polished remake of a better movie, showed creative and intellectual cowardice of the company, and a blatant, bad attempt at pandering to fans. The biggest issue was that my gf and I had a big argument about it afterwards. It takes a really bad movie to make us argue like that.
    At least that Star Wars movie was actually a Star Wars movie, and not a generic science fiction war movie with some Star Wars specific material thrown in as an afterthought like Rogue One

    Quote Originally Posted by BWR View Post
    Ghostbuster (2016): What a waste of money and a couple hours. It was distinctly unfunny and cringe-inducing and I was bored silly throughout, but at least there was enough happening that it was less offensive than the next entry.
    I didn't see the film but from the ads it looked like it also relied heavily on black stereotypes for it's humor. Was this actually the case?
    Last edited by Bohandas; 2017-09-17 at 05:10 AM.
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  2. - Top - End - #272
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    Default Re: Movies you regret watching

    Quote Originally Posted by anonymsly View Post
    For me, forever and always, it's American Beauty. I do not understand the tongue bath given to it by every single person I have every tried to speak to about this movie.

    It is a movie about awful people doing awful things to each other that could have been resolved with one, maybe two, actual conversations. I literally - and I am not exaggerating - had to go to the restroom and vomit about halfway through. I only stayed for the whole thing because I was 17 and on a date.

    I have watched bad movies. I have hated movies. But only American Beauty made me actually physically ill.
    Funny, that was completely not my experience.

    I only watched it pretty recently, and I was from what I knew about it expecting a very heavy handed Lolita story. What I actually saw was made with a lot of humor. Yes, the characters are all awful people, but they weren't written in a depressing way (I'm looking at you Adriaan van Dis, I'm never forgiving you for that book I chose to read myself for high school literature). There was in fact an air of slapstick to it, it was all enlarged in a way I found pretty humorous. It helped that there were a bunch of different storylines, you never stick with one for long enough to really be taken down by the serious matter underneath. The part that's advertised as the main storyline in particular, with the married dude falling is love with his daughters high school friend, is kept much shorter than I was expecting, really lampshades how desire warps what the characters see and actually has a pretty decent conclusion. Sure, before that point the guy disrupts the lives of everyone around him, but that only happens because their lives were already broken. In some ways the shaken up broken down situation at the end is better than the eternally dragging one at the start. At least it frees up some of the characters to get on with a semblance of a life again.

    I'm overall a lot less angry now that the Matrix (or The Green Mile, or Three Kings, or South Park) didn't win that Oscar. Still a little, but not as much.

    I might have reacted a lot worse to it had I seen it at a younger age though, it probably helps that my situation is detached from both the younger and the older characters in the movie, or if I had seen it before my "watch all the horror" period, that might have desensitized me a little bit.



    And just so I have a legitimate entry in this thread, I think the worst movie I saw recently enough to remember is Barbarian. It's violently bad in such a way that you can't enjoy it nor stop watching. It has all the worst parts of Star Wars (you'll know it when you see it, but I'd advise you not to), generic fantasy, Cold Steel commercials, bodybuilder workout videos and porn. And only the worst parts. It's not even recommendable for its so bad its good value, because it isn't. Somebody had a half decent budget and an at least partly talented crew and they decided on making something pretty close to the actual end product we got, and I hope we never find out why.

    Okay, okay, the Star Wars bit is a bad ewok costume seemingly inhabited by a gungan with a medical degree. I don't want to be responsible for people watching this thing out of curiosity.
    Last edited by Lvl 2 Expert; 2017-09-17 at 05:31 AM.
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  3. - Top - End - #273
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    Quote Originally Posted by 2D8HP View Post

    Dark Water

    Not the Japanese original (which I have no intention of seeing), but the 2005 re-make.
    Just disturbing.

    Like most ever movie I've seen this decade, my wife got it from the library.

    She regretted watching it as well.
    My parents let me watch horror movies way too young, I still can't sleep in a room with a TV in it.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lvl 2 Expert View Post
    I'm overall a lot less angry now that the Matrix (or The Green Mile, or Three Kings, or South Park) didn't win that Oscar.
    Three Kings was fantastic. I like that they used actual Iraqi refugees for most of the characters, too.
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  5. - Top - End - #275
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    Quote Originally Posted by DuctTapeKatar View Post
    Do you have that moment that a movie rots inside your head? Like, you got yourself a good movie, but as time goes on, it just gets all shriveled, moldy, and gross? That happened to me.
    Fantastic Beasts and Where To Find Them. I watched it with my mother and enjoyed it while watching it, but once we were on the ride back home, everything about it falls apart. Why did Tina assume that Newt's book was about hunting them and not conservation? The US Forestry Service had been around for 30 years at this point! Why do they think the amnesiacal rain will make people forget a US Senator (and likely about to announce his Presidential run) is dead. And why is Graves able to get our heroes sentenced to death with no fanfare? Ever hear of a little thing called "due process"? Sure, that kind of thing was authorize at the height of Voldemort's reign of terror, but we have no evidence that Graves is using emergency powers. For all we know, he has the final say on executions whenever he feels like.

    It's the epitome of a worldbuilding fail.
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  6. - Top - End - #276
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bohandas View Post
    At least that Star Wars movie was actually a Star Wars movie, and not a generic science fiction war movie with some Star Wars specific material thrown in as an afterthought like Rogue One
    Rogue One was an actually good movie and was different, and mostly made sense. Unlike TFA on all accounts.

    Quote Originally Posted by Bohandas View Post
    I didn't see the film but from the ads it looked like it also relied heavily on black stereotypes for it's humor. Was this actually the case?
    Some, I guess. Those aren't the sort of black stereotypes we have around here so it doesn't register that much. There was mostly a bunch of anti-intellectualism, complete and utter moron jokes, fat jokes, people trying to be funny weird and just being boring and uncomfortably weird. it was recognizably an attempt at humor, even if everything but the dance scene failed miserably.

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    Walt Disney movie on Netflix. I watched The Founder (about McDonald's) and it was really really good, then it was suggested and I wasted 2 hours of my life. Fell short for me.

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    Quote Originally Posted by DuctTapeKatar View Post
    Do you have that moment that a movie rots inside your head? Like, you got yourself a good movie, but as time goes on, it just gets all shriveled, moldy, and gross? That happened to me.
    Minority Report. It was a decent action movie with an apparently sublime theme when I first watched it. But after a bit of thinking, and especially after a second viewing, I see several major flaws with the movie. The most glaring one is that the actions of both the protagonist and the antagonist make no sense at all.

    The antagonist's plan would not work at all according to the rules established at the very beginning of the movie when the basic premise is explained (the stuff with the tamper-proof wooden balls).

    The protagonist's plan is even more foolish: He is actively working to make a prophecy happen in order to prove that he he is not the subject of the prophecy! Said prophecy predicts that he will murder a man at a certain time in a certain place. The protagonist escapes from the clutches of those that want to prevent this from happening. He escapes! So what is his brilliant plan to do next? Do everything he can to get to the predicted place at that predicted time, of course! What is his plan once he gets there? I do not even know. All he has to do is lay low and do nothing for a few days. He is in perfect position to do just that. In fact, if he should do anything, he should avoid at all cost to do be at that place at that time. Yet, half the movie is about his struggle to get to that place in time. This does not even happen once, but he escapes several times and has several opportunities to prevent the prophecy from happening by doing nothing, yet he does not. Big surprise: Despite all his heroic efforts, the prophecy eventually comes to pass

    What really bugs me about this movie is that few people, I have spoken with, see these glaring flaws (there are even more, but a rant about those could fill a book). The movie is generally well remembered. I have the suspicion that many people do not dare to criticize this movie because at first glance it looks quite intellectual and people do not want to look stupid by criticizing it. Yet, under that thin veil this movie is just a very, very dumb action flick. Nothing makes sense. Every scene is just a setup for the next action sequence, instead of being driven by the plot. Yet, this movie is regarded as a cinematic achievement, for featuring themes that are somewhat relevant today
    Last edited by Seppl; 2017-09-17 at 05:00 PM.

  9. - Top - End - #279
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    Default Re: Movies you regret watching

    The Minority Report short story that it's based on works much better than the movie. If you haven't read it, try hunting down a copy.

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    Quote Originally Posted by The Glyphstone View Post
    The Minority Report short story that it's based on works much better than the movie. If you haven't read it, try hunting down a copy.
    Though they're barely related. The basic premise of "precrime officer ironically becomes target of precrime himself" is there I suppose, but beyond that it's an entirely different story.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Kitten Champion View Post
    Though they're barely related. The basic premise of "precrime officer ironically becomes target of precrime himself" is there I suppose, but beyond that it's an entirely different story.
    Well yeah. But I think a lot of the movie's problems came from taking that basic premise - particularly the ending, which is what makes the entire story hold together in the first place - and changing it to provide a more thriller/action-packed plot. The seed story itself is very solid.

    On the other hand, I think Total Recall (the original) was a far better story than We Can Remember It For You Wholesale, which it was based on. So like everything, it's hit or miss.
    Last edited by The Glyphstone; 2017-09-18 at 10:19 AM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by The Glyphstone View Post
    Well yeah. But I think a lot of the movie's problems came from taking that basic premise - particularly the ending, which is what makes the entire story hold together in the first place - and changing it to provide a more thriller/action-packed plot. The seed story itself is very solid.
    I have my own issues with that movie, specifically that it manufactures a false binary with precrime - that it's either a flawless system or a constitutional nightmare - rather than a highly accurate warning system that the State could use to step in with measured preventative actions, like sending a trained official to confront them first rather than going whole-hog and convicting them of murder and tossing them in cold storage.

    I will give Minority Report credit for this though - and why I don't regret seeing it personally - that it presents a fairly visually appealing and positive future with well-considered futurists elements underpinning it. Yes, it has psychics and such, but the crux of strong SF is to take the absurd and surround it with more believable elements and Minority Report does that well with its universe -- if not story and characters. While Dick's Minority Report is, well... par for the course as far as his settings go.

    Quote Originally Posted by The Glyphstone View Post
    On the other hand, I think Total Recall (the original) was a far better story than We Can Remember It For You Wholesale, which it was based on. So like everything, it's hit or miss.
    Yeah, but We Can Remember It For You Wholesale was only a few pages and is basically just a fairly long joke... which is why the remake's claim that it was going to be following the source material more than the original was so confusing.

  13. - Top - End - #283
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    Ghost Story - This is your stereotypical, overindulgent, pretentious art film. Like I love art films and indie films. But god damn it, I don't know if it's the horrible pacing or the presentation of unoriginal nihilistic themes. Like I felt this movies length like within the first 30 minutes. I mean Casey Affleck as a bedsheet ghost with no dialog or movement or acting is funny for like 15 minutes but then it just gets depressing, but not in an emotional way either, because the movie doesn't give you anything to be emotionally invested in other than perhaps to relate your own mortality and thoughts to the situation, but the thing is it still tries to present some sort of watered down 'character arc' that's stretched over something that is way longer than it should be.

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    Ooooh, someone posted about The Usual Suspects and Fight Club in a "plot twists you loved" thread, and that reminded me.

    The Usual Suspects and Fight Club. God, I hated those. And then I had to read the Fight Club book for an English class. One of the few times I can definitively say the movie was better than the book, and I hated the movie.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Peelee View Post
    Ooooh, someone posted about The Usual Suspects and Fight Club in a "plot twists you loved" thread, and that reminded me.

    The Usual Suspects and Fight Club. God, I hated those. And then I had to read the Fight Club book for an English class. One of the few times I can definitively say the movie was better than the book, and I hated the movie.
    I highly recommend not reading any of Chuck Palahniuk's other books, took me 3 tries to figure this one out (Fight Club, Survivor & then Haunted (shudder)), and Fight Club is his least disturbing work by a looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong shot. He writes well, but ho-boy is it gag-inducing in subject matter.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Peelee View Post
    The Usual Suspects and Fight Club. God, I hated those. And then I had to read the Fight Club book for an English class. One of the few times I can definitively say the movie was better than the book, and I hated the movie.
    If it was a good book you wouldn't have read it in english class. In my experience english class curriculums consist exclusively of the kind of thing that could've been picked out by the villain from Mystery Science Theater 3000
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wookieetank View Post
    I highly recommend not reading any of Chuck Palahniuk's other books
    Oh, I can promise you that was decided quite some time ago. Right after reading Fight Club, in fact.
    Quote Originally Posted by Bohandas View Post
    If it was a good book you wouldn't have read it in english class.
    Preaching to the choir!
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bohandas View Post
    If it was a good book you wouldn't have read it in english class. In my experience english class curriculums consist exclusively of the kind of thing that could've been picked out by the villain from Mystery Science Theater 3000
    I've read some excellent stuff in english class. Just off the top of my head:
    • Macbeth, Hamlet, Othello
    • The Odyssey
    • A Hullabaloo in the Guava Orchard
    • Things Fall Apart
    • Chronicle of a Death Foretold
    • Crime and Punishment



    That's from high school alone, and there were some good ones before (not after, although that's more because I never took a college literature class than anything; I have read some books on the curriculum of some of these classes that were solid).
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    Quote Originally Posted by Knaight View Post
    • Macbeth, Hamlet, Othello
    • The Odyssey
    • A Hullabaloo in the Guava Orchard
    • Things Fall Apart
    • Chronicle of a Death Foretold
    • Crime and Punishment


    Wow, that's a good list!

    I remember
    • 1984 (in Junior High School)
    • The Great Gatsby (who's characters I hated)
    • Othello
    • Julius Caesar
    • Great Expectations
    and short stories the titles and authors I've forgotten.

    That's it.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Knaight View Post
    I've read some excellent stuff in english class. Just off the top of my head:
    [I]
    • The Odyssey
    Quote Originally Posted by 2D8HP View Post
    • 1984
    Those I did love, but I hated reading them in English Class. Well, the Odyssey, anyway. 1984 they at least had the sense to put on the summer reading list.
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    Alien: Covenant. A lot of dull moments, very cliche plot. Just another Alien movie...

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    Quote Originally Posted by 2D8HP View Post
    [*]The Great Gatsby [/I] (who's characters I hated)[I]
    I honestly couldn't tell what this book was supposed to be about or why anybody should care
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    I read The Hobbit for English class.

    By that time I had already read both The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings in Dutch, because back then I still read thick books for pleasure, so it was redundant if anything.

    I also remember how much less well put together I found the story having already read Lord. Hobbit almost seemed a bit childish at that point.

    Then again, I do not remember any of the big action scenes Peter Jackson found when he read it, so maybe I just remember it wrong.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lvl 2 Expert View Post
    I read The Hobbit for English class.

    By that time I had already read both The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings in Dutch, because back then I still read thick books for pleasure, so it was redundant if anything.

    I also remember how much less well put together I found the story having already read Lord. Hobbit almost seemed a bit childish at that point.

    Then again, I do not remember any of the big action scenes Peter Jackson found when he read it, so maybe I just remember it wrong.
    I loved when Legolas ran up the falling rocks in the book.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Peelee View Post
    I loved when Legolas ran up the falling rocks in the book.
    I liked the part where Fili and Kili were clean shaven and definitely not both blonde myself.
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    From Dusk Til Dawn. I saw the last ten minutes or so one time and thought "wow, I've gotta see the rest of this movie". Big mistake! Turns out those last ten minutes are the only part of the movie where anythig actually happens, what precedes is an hour and a half of pure tedium
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    Quote Originally Posted by Keltest View Post
    I liked the part where Fili and Kili were clean shaven and definitely not both blonde myself.
    Interestingly, when my friend first ran to me with huge smile on his face because there was going to be Hobbit movie - specifically, 3 movies each around 3 hours, I took the book from a shelf, where it stood for past 12 years or so... and asked him, what is going to be in the third part. As a joke, I theorized that it will be battle of five armies, from viewpoint of every participant, including several orcs, in 3D and with slo-mo.

    I'm sorry.




    I regret watching Running Man.

    I read the book and the same friend who told me about Hobbit movie told me there was a movie! Since I was young and naïve, I thought: "Nobody can ruin this book!".

    Cue Ahnold.

    I don't mind Conan the Barbarian with him. But I hated Running Man.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bohandas View Post
    From Dusk Til Dawn. I saw the last ten minutes or so one time and thought "wow, I've gotta see the rest of this movie". Big mistake! Turns out those last ten minutes are the only part of the movie where anythig actually happens, what precedes is an hour and a half of pure tedium
    Really? Because I love that movie. The ending if anything is my least favorite part, where the story kind of falls apart and they just throw more vampires at it. It's still possibly the only movie where they manage to use a significant amount of nudity without bringing the plot to a screaching halt and making me hate the sexy scenes. That alone is an accomplishment. I also love the group dynamic of the core 5 characters. And the opening scene, I'm a sucker for opening scenes, that's why I'm such a Luc Besson fanboy (nothing to do with this movie). I'm such a big fan I even made my way through the two sequels and season one of the series, which mostly just follows the cues of the movie at a much slower pace, without actively disliking them.

    So to each his/her own I guess.
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    Default Re: Movies you regret watching

    Quote Originally Posted by Lvl 2 Expert View Post
    Really? Because I love that movie. The ending if anything is my least favorite part, where the story kind of falls apart and they just throw more vampires at it. It's still possibly the only movie where they manage to use a significant amount of nudity without bringing the plot to a screaching halt and making me hate the sexy scenes. That alone is an accomplishment. I also love the group dynamic of the core 5 characters. And the opening scene, I'm a sucker for opening scenes, that's why I'm such a Luc Besson fanboy (nothing to do with this movie). I'm such a big fan I even made my way through the two sequels and season one of the series, which mostly just follows the cues of the movie at a much slower pace, without actively disliking them.

    So to each his/her own I guess.
    I was totally that guy who didn't know it was going to be a vampire movie. I was getting pretty into the whole kidnapping story, and then things just went crazy and switched to a completely different genre. I guess it was fun, but I still wanna know how that kidnapping story was gonna go if not for the vampires.

  30. - Top - End - #300
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    Default Re: Movies you regret watching

    Really every Quentin Tarintino film except Kill Bill has been regrettable for the same reason as From Dusk Til Dawn they all have one or two really good scenes that draw me in and make me watch it and then I when I watch the film I realize I've already seen everything in the movie worth watching during those clips or previews I saw and that most of the movie is just filler.

    The most egregious example is Death Proof which had no worthwhile scenes at all but I watched because it was part of a double feature with Planet Terror

    EDIT:
    I have a similar problem with Will Ferrell movies. If you've already seen the fight scene from Anchorman (and the scene that i,mediately follows it) there's no reason to watch the rest of the film, because while those two scenes are great, thay're the only good scenes in the entire movie
    Last edited by Bohandas; 2017-09-26 at 10:43 AM.
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