Movies you regret watching

[Knaight]

Most of you are not getting the idea.

I'm not talking about movies that made you go like "Hun... That was bad; I wish I haven't watched, that movie... Oh well."

But rather "OMG WTF is that? My eyes oh god my eyes!!! Why did I do that to my self?"

Get it?

That's not a reaction I'm prone to, but if a visceral reaction of "Everyone who was involved with this can piss right off, you condescending scum", tempered only in that the blame shifted up the chain and away from actors and technicians counts then Forrest Gump still makes the list.

[Fable Wright]

I don't remember too many examples. That said, I despised Noah, which my dad dragged me to because its dull misanthropy, unnecessary green aesop, and non-overdone take on Christian lore got it mostly positive critical reviews. God what a waste of my life. It's a guy, building a boat, because screw every other human being on this planet. They didn't even commit at the end and end the human race, and just the sheer misanthropy and callousness in the movie made me feel unclean as well as bored out of my skull walking out of the theater.

Also I Am Legend. The whole way through was droll and pointless. Guy blows himself up at the end, then there's the whole 'thin ray of hope that the human race may live on' thing at the end that's just a cop-out ending. Normally, this would just be utterly forgettable, and it was for many years. Until I learned what the ending should have been. That ending was the single ray of light that made a remarkably dull novel worth reading, and removing it from the final cut makes me feel personally insulted as a human being, like the directors are talking down to me and humanity in general. **** every single executive involved in the decision. I'd hate Will Smith as well, but I get the feeling that he only signed on because he thought he was going to be working with the source material.

[Solaris]

Two that leap to mind as part of why I avoid movies in the theater are Chappie and Jupiter Ascending. I've ranted about them before on these forums, but the short version is not only did they manage to insult the audience with their mind-boggling stupidity, they wasted what could have been perfectly good concepts to do it with. There are no redeeming features of those movies. There is nothing of them to warrant their continued existence. All involved with their creation should be publicly humiliated and blacklisted because of the sheer, dizzying depths of the awful that doesn't just exist as a great layer of excrement, it gets worse the more you peel back and examine the stories. There are layers upon layers of crap that went into making those movies. I swear they deliberately tried to make them as stupid as humanly possible, and the fact that anyone even likes Chappie makes me weep for the species.

And this is from someone who likes the Transformers movies. Michael Bay at least cops to being what he is, you see. Never did I expect a high-brow movie out of the man, and he consistently delivers a product that, at its worst, is fun to make fun of. Neither of the movies I listed are even worth the riffing, as they get me genuinely angry with their godawful, pretentious, stupid wastes of ideas and budgets.

[Peelee]

Also I Am Legend. The whole way through was droll and pointless. Guy blows himself up at the end, then there's the whole 'thin ray of hope that the human race may live on' thing at the end that's just a cop-out ending. Normally, this would just be utterly forgettable, and it was for many years. Until I learned what the ending should have been. That ending was the single ray of light that made a remarkably dull novel worth reading, and removing it from the final cut makes me feel personally insulted as a human being, like the directors are talking down to me and humanity in general. **** every single executive involved in the decision. I'd hate Will Smith as well, but I get the feeling that he only signed on because he thought he was going to be working with the source material.

Didn't they shoot it with the original ending, and test audiences hated it, so they reshot the end into what was released? I heard that somewhere, no idea of the veracity.

[Dienekes]

Didn't they shoot it with the original ending, and test audiences hated it, so they reshot the end into what was released? I heard that somewhere, no idea of the veracity.

It was in various discussions around the movie. Basically test audiences preferred the happy ending, while the critics preferred the more somber ending.

And, that makes sense to me. Basically the entire movie seems to be setting up the creation of the cure, that becomes the sole focus of the story, and it ignored the parts of the book about how the zombie/vampires had their own culture and lives. Because in the book there are pains taken to show some of the zombie/vampires were intelligent while in the movie they're all just screaming monsters.

So when the ending comes about that suddenly just shows the zombie/vampires with their culture and their romance it all sort of feels kind of hollow, because of how little the attempt to make that point was foreshadowed in the previous hour. While finding the cure, and saving those two other humans was the sole focus, and was properly set up.

While the original ending is still a great twist and, if it was set up like in the books, would be perfectly acceptable, when put at the end of the rest of the movie it still feels off. So audiences would be confused, while the critics who want to see something new would say "neat message, interesting bait and switch there."

[Vinyadan]

Fun fact, the legend novel indirectly spawned Night of the Living Dead, which set about to explain the start of the novel's reality.

Meet the Spartans, Transformers, Crocodile Dundee are all movies I'd rather not have seen. They weren't just bad, there was nothing to learn from them, unlike e.g. propaganda films.

[Shackel]

if a visceral reaction of "Everyone who was involved with this can piss right off, you condescending scum", tempered only in that the blame shifted up the chain and away from actors and technicians counts then Forrest Gump still makes the list.

If this indeed counts, then my movie is simple:

Lucy.

Lucy. Lucy. Lucy. Never before had I felt like I had 90 minutes of my life torn away, dangled in front of me ad thrown into the trash, and never have I, since. Insulting, condescending, flashing colors and worthless attempts at being philosophical. Wasted potential and a main MacGuffin that feels like it's been shoehorned into the nonsensical plot(I mean, really? A drug that if you overdose on it has a chance to turn you into a superhuman? And the big bad's plan was to... sell it to European teens? Are you serious? Are you actually serious?) wrapped up in absolutely mind-boggling imagery(seeing cellphone calls?).

And the ending all wrapped it up as making the movie feel like if someone looked at 2001 and thought, "boring, this needs more tits and action!"

[Velaryon]

Most of you are not getting the idea.

I'm not talking about movies that made you go like "Hun... That was bad; I wish I haven't watched, that movie... Oh well."

But rather "OMG WTF is that? My eyes oh god my eyes!!! Why did I do that to my self?"

Get it?

I would rather have an unnecessary root canal with no anesthetic than watch either of the films I listed again. Had I the choice to do it over again, I would not have watched either film the first time. I think that puts me on board with your original premise.

Thankskilling 3: The Search for Thankskilling 2.

Oh jeez, there's more than one?!?! The only reason Thankskilling wasn't the very first film I mentioned is because I'd nearly managed to block out all memory of it. It was barely an hour long and still felt about two hours longer than it should have been. It saddens me quite a bit to learn that someone actually greenlit a sequel, and I've no doubt that the world is a worse place for having it.

[90,000]

I feel like I won't be getting into the proper spirit of this thread with my answer.

But I don't regret watching many films. The ones that are particularly bad I can, at least, learn something from.

The ones that are technically competent but soulless, witless and flavourless offer me nothing.

They just take.

With that in mind; pick any Marvel Cinematic Universe movie released prior to Guardians of the Galaxy.

That was around the time I gave up trying to see what everyone else saw.

[Keltest]

I decidedly did not care for 9 at all. The animation was strange, the plot was kind of crazy, and the pseudo-philosophy that drove the plot really turned me off.

"the characters bumble around, get some people killed, destroy a lot of things they care about, but eventually it will be OK because soul magic, or something"? No.

[Strigon]

Oh jeez, there's more than one?!?! The only reason Thankskilling wasn't the very first film I mentioned is because I'd nearly managed to block out all memory of it. It was barely an hour long and still felt about two hours longer than it should have been. It saddens me quite a bit to learn that someone actually greenlit a sequel, and I've no doubt that the world is a worse place for having it.

Spoiler: Oh, my friend, you have no idea.

Show

So, there are only 2. Thankskilling 3, the search for thankskilling 2, takes place in a reality where Thankskilling was a movie, and the turkey who starred in it was very proud of Thankskilling. But Thankskilling 2 was the worst movie ever made, so all copies but one were destroyed. The turkey goes on a murderous rampage, killing his wife and son. He uses his son's... ghost? As a radar to find the last copy.

Then, there's this... Fluttershy muppet who lost her mind - literally, one of the first scenes is her searching in a dumpster for her mind:

The rest of the movie is live action. Nobody questions why there's a muppet.

There's also a frankly hideous grandma that raps:

Again, no question about why she's a puppet.

And, to make things worse, there were at least two times in the movie when a robot was sodomized by a sentient worm. Graphically.

In short, if Thankskilling were a car, it would get 0.5 miles to the gallon, be fitted with seats too small for any human being, and have no muffler.
If Thankskilling 3 were a car, it would be all that, plus the seats would be made of spikes and the exhaust would vent directly into your face.

[veti]

I know people like it but I really hated Se7en. It disgusted me to no end... I guess I was too young at the time and I watched without my parents' authorization.

Ha. I was 30 years old when I saw that movie, and I still loathed it. The disgusting setups, the idiot hero, the twist telegraphed about six weeks ahead... that is one overrated movie. But not to the point of "regret having watched" - because with the way people rave about it, if I hadn't seen it, I would wonder what I was missing.

[KillingAScarab]

There are, presently, only two movies I regret seeing at a theater, and one of those was just because of some unfortunate events there. The other was A Series of Unfortunate Events. Someone told me later they had attempted to cram four books worth of story into one film, and it felt like it, but when it escalated to an attempt to make a child bride out of one of the protagonists I walked out.

[Mystic Muse]

There are, presently, only two movies I regret seeing at a theater, and one of those was just because of some unfortunate events there. The other was A Series of Unfortunate Events. Someone told me later they had attempted to cram four books worth of story into one film, and it felt like it, but when it escalated to an attempt to make a child bride out of one of the protagonists I walked out.

Spoiler: Spoilers for A series of Unfortunate Events

Show

This actually happens in the first book,
And it's intended to be screwed up. Olaf explicitly wants to marry her for the money then murder the Baudelaires.

[KillingAScarab]

Spoiler: Spoilers for A series of Unfortunate Events

Show

This actually happens in the first book,
And it's intended to be screwed up. Olaf explicitly wants to marry her for the money then murder the Baudelaires.

Spoiler

Show

Oh, I can understand Olaf was definitely a villain by that point. Cramming together multiple attempts to get the family fortune made him and his means very predictable, which I suppose I can write off by not being in the target age of the audience. I remember when they got to the scene where Olaf, the children (and Mr. Poe?) were sitting in a dinghy that I instantly knew what Olaf's final move was going to be. On top of it being so predictable at that point, I found the "If you can't beat 'em, join 'em," turn in this context to be kind of disgusting and entirely broke any attempt to stay in the story. Having not read the books and only watched a trailer for the movie, I was down for child endangerment which is averted by the kids' own abilities, particularly Violet's. I wasn't down for a reminder of state-sponsored reduction of women to property. It became a bit too Victorian for my liking.

I can see how Olaf attempting to marry Violet would make sense in the 1st book, if subsequent attempts to get rich had less and less regard for law.

[tomandtish]

I just saw Sausage Party last night.

I'm reasonably sure I lost 40 IQ points....

It's three years of my life I'll never get back.

[Ebon_Drake]

I just saw Sausage Party last night.

I'm reasonably sure I lost 40 IQ points....

It's three years of my life I'll never get back.

Man, that is one long movie! Actually, even assuming you meant to type three hours that seems excessive; I'd have thought that movie would be the kind to struggle to reach 90 minutes. I'm not Googling the actual run-time though, I don't want that in my search history.

The movie that really sticks out in my mind as a "geez, I actually paid money to see this!" experience is Quantum of Solace. What a great big fat load of nothing that was. The plot was basically non-existent and all the shaky-cam action made me feel nauseous. It actually made me retroactively dislike Casino Royale for tricking me into seeing such a poor follow-up.

I feel like I could probably have said the same for Spectre, but I learnt my lesson after Quantum of Solace and avoided that like the plague. Fool me once...

[thompur]

The Adventures Of Pluto Nash. I had just seen The 13th Warrior and had nothing else to do, so I snuck in to see TAoPN.
After 10 minutes, I walk out, ready to demand a refund, even though I hadn't paid for it. The most execrable piece of crapola I've ever seen!

[8BitNinja]

The Last Airbender

Yes, I watched the whole thing

[tomandtish]

Man, that is one long movie! Actually, even assuming you meant to type three hours that seems excessive; I'd have thought that movie would be the kind to struggle to reach 90 minutes. I'm not Googling the actual run-time though, I don't want that in my search history.

I meant three years. That's what it felt like.

[t209]

I just saw Sausage Party last night.

I'm reasonably sure I lost 40 IQ points....

It's three years of my life I'll never get back.

You'll never be Fritz the Cat, Seth Rogan. You'll never be Bakshi.

[eggynack]

The Last Airbender

Yes, I watched the whole thing

The Last Airbender actually lands pretty high in my so bad it's good power rankings. Seen it a few times. I think my favorite part was when Ahng said, and I'm paraphrasing here, "The greatest airbenders... could meditate... for three days." Such a ridiculously mundane thing for a crazy spiritual world. That movie has a ton of hilarious stuff. The weird mispronunciations, the odd narrative structure, the classically memetic stuff like penis hair and the boulder dance, setting the episode imprisoned in an area entirely made of stone, the out of place VO, and, of course, Zhao getting taken out by a team of anonymous water benders drowning him to death onscreen. Could go on and on about this movie. It is, of course, not on the level of something like Birdemic, and stuff like The Room or Glen or Glenda is on separated out by a whole order of magnitude or two, but I thoroughly enjoy it every time I watch. Such a weird movie. I'm always strangely hoping they actually get around to making an awful sequel.

[Lemmy]

"The Happening" and "Knowing"...

I've seen many bad movies, but these are the only ones I can remember were so goddamn boring and stupid that I felt nothing but regret after watching it. Not a single piece of them is good... Not even in a "so bad it's good" sense. They aren't funny. They aren't clever. They aren't well acted or well directed... Nothing. They are a waste of human effort.

[Corlindale]

There's a French film called Irreversible which is just super unpleasant to watch. I don't really know if it's a bad film - it's clearly designed to be unpleasant to watch, so in that sense it works very well. Still wish I hadn't seen it.

[Gnoman]

The Wal*Mart around here always has (or used to have -I now only buy Blu-Rays new and get DVDs used exclusively) a huge bin of $5 DVDs, which were a mix of older films, direct-to-video sequels, and public-domain collections. Digging through this bin was often a good way to find cheap entertainment for a family Friday or Saturday night back when my sister and I were still in high school, and the times the movie turned into a bust usually worked out to be worth laughing at if nothing else.

Except one time, when we bought a horror movie called Into The Fire. The plot was literally incomprehensible (imagine a Game Of Thrones-style pileup of schemes, except on a small farm with absolutely nobody having any motive), and the random love scenes thrown about with no rhyme or reason gave the appearance that it had been cut down to "R". The real horror is that it exists.

[8BitNinja]

The Wal*Mart around here always has (or used to have -I now only buy Blu-Rays new and get DVDs used exclusively) a huge bin of $5 DVDs, which were a mix of older films, direct-to-video sequels, and public-domain collections. Digging through this bin was often a good way to find cheap entertainment for a family Friday or Saturday night back when my sister and I were still in high school, and the times the movie turned into a bust usually worked out to be worth laughing at if nothing else.

Except one time, when we bought a horror movie called Into The Fire. The plot was literally incomprehensible (imagine a Game Of Thrones-style pileup of schemes, except on a small farm with absolutely nobody having any motive), and the random love scenes thrown about with no rhyme or reason gave the appearance that it had been cut down to "R". The real horror is that it exists.

What's sad is that it shares the name of a song made by Sabaton that's actually pretty good in my opinion.

And the song is about the Vietnam War, so I doubt the movie and song have any correlation

[Rogar Demonblud]

The movie that really sticks out in my mind as a "geez, I actually paid money to see this!" experience is Quantum of Solace. What a great big fat load of nothing that was. The plot was basically non-existent and all the shaky-cam action made me feel nauseous.

Again, a victim of the last Writers Guild strike. Or rather, that and a contract with the Fleming estate that forced them to shoot an incomplete script to avoid losing the franchise. The shaky cam and Jack White music is all of them, though.

[Deadline]

Maybe my standards for bad are just lower than other people. The worst movie I had seen in a long time was recommended to me by a friend and fellow zombie movie enthusiast. I watched it out of trust, and clearly that was a mistake. That move is Stacy.

Of course, the worst movie I've ever seen is Transformers 4. Can't believe I sat through that. *shudders*

[Lentrax]

The Boondock Saints. Granted, I have a bias against my viewing of it. I had no interest in watching it. It was not something I wanted to see, but when during a game night with my riends the movie came up, I honestly admitted I had never seen it. And so, everyone stopped what we were doing, stopped our game, and over my protests, put the movie in, turned it on, and did nothing else. So I laboriously sat through a movie, and hated it for being made to watch it.

Star Trek Into Darkness. I mean seriously. It was just bad. At least the first of the "Kelvin-verse" movies was a generic B-level scifi movie. But when you put the name Star Trek to something. When you put the name James T Kirk to something, don't give me a rehash of Wrath of Khan with a dumb twist.

Battlefield: Earth. Why have I not yet gotten my money back for this travesty? Why, John Travolta, why?

[Jimorian]

The movie that really sticks out in my mind as a "geez, I actually paid money to see this!" experience is Quantum of Solace. What a great big fat load of nothing that was. The plot was basically non-existent and all the shaky-cam action made me feel nauseous. It actually made me retroactively dislike Casino Royale for tricking me into seeing such a poor follow-up.

If a car crashes in your parking garage, and it causes a chain reaction that burns down and blows up your ENTIRE HOTEL, you might want to rethink your safety design. I won't even get into how using hydrogen as an alternate energy source doesn't work that way in the first place, and even if it did, you wouldn't need to run pipes of it THROUGH every room in the hotel....