Funny Character Deaths

[Ivor_The_Mad]

A lot of my characters have died in embarrassing or funny ways (for some reason my bards don't last very long. It could be due to my music hating orc barbarian). On one dungeon my adventure group was trying to infiltrate a heavily defended city so they had disguised them selves as traveling merchants. About half way to the city my bard who is sitting in the back of the cart gets bored and starts singing taylor swift songs. My barbarian who is hiding under a sack starts to get mad and about 15 minutes later the sack bursts into flames (blame the DM) and my barbarian jumps out in a berserker rage and makes a grapple attack on the poor bard (he just wanted to be famous) and stuffs him in the flaming sack and then he proceeds to boil the bard on the side of the road. Unknown to us there were a few owl bears in the area and at the smell of broiled bard they got hungry. I never did see that bard or barbarian again. So if you have any funny character deaths please post them.

[Sir cryosin]

In my group I'm am the red shirt player form some reason my character's end up dead I uselly have 3 PC's per campaign module. I sometimes play a little risky but I'm also most of the time the front liner and don't get any back up. any way here's how my last character died.

So the party is on are airship when we see a huge house barn place were a hill giant queen/leader thing was living. So we were talking about doing a Halo drop from the ship. So we sent the fly teifling rogue in to do recon and find out were the leader is. So as she's doing that we try and bring the airship over the house but keep it hidden in the clouds. We failed are stealth check so they spotted us and started locking up the house and setting barricades. At this time the rogue starts attacking the leader and hiding. The bard and Wizard cast fly on them selfs and start flying down it's going to take time for them. So it just me a Jedi mystic build and a Artificer with his mech and every has a pet Drake. At this point I was growing inpatient and teleported to the roof. The Artificer is staring at the rest of use saying I have no way to get down y'all left me up there. So rogue is shooting and hiding. Bard and wizard is flying down. So I run to the Chimney jumped down it. I found a halfling tied to a spick about to be cooked I killed a Hobgoblin. Then make my way to the main hall were the leader and 4 giants and a handful of goblin's in the room. I run in and end my turn not being able to do anything else. It now the giants turn the run over to me and beat the living hell out of me droping me to 0hp.

So this is were I die the most embarrassing yet funny yet effed-up way. So the giants drop me take my dying body over to the fat blob. We're they drop my body into her mouth. So as my body is sliding down her throat. The rogue keeps shooting her ending up killing her but we don't know this yet. By know the bard and Wizard makes it to the ground and start fighting the guys outside. The Artificer not being able to use the Ballista position in a spot where he can fire on the guys down below. He has his giant Mech pick up ballista bolts and just start chucking them down like they were javelins. So it comes back around my turn and I make a death saving throw I rolled and I save and so this routine goes on for a couple rounds I keep making death saving throws and I ended up stabilizing myself. The artificer has his Mech throw another Ballista Bolt down into the building to try and hit the leader. It hits then the DM asked him to make another D20 roll. He rules and then the DM says that my body goes up her throw a little bit more so I'm closer to the entrance of her mouth. So I am now stabilized inside this Giants freakin throat but unfortunately I am now under the rules of suffocating. Which means I only have a fine mount mount of turns before I am completely dead and the only person in the party that knows that I am in a bad situation is the Rogue and you know what she does she just keeps shooting in hiding!!!! So everybody keeps on doing what they've been doing The Bard and The Wizard end up killing everybody outside the Rogue has just about everybody inside killed already and the artificer picks up this giant magical Bolder that we have that can shrink or enlarge and he has his Meg picks it up enlarge it and just toss it down. This giant boulder comes crashing through the roof and land with the net 20 he running that 20 on this on top of the head of the leader rushing the upper part of the leader and my body that is inside of the leaders throat. But this was already a round or two after I died.

So the party ended ends up finishing off all the enemies then they begin to search for the magical item that we needed to get from here. When the wizard who was supposed to be my partner from the Harper's ask where's my character at. The Rogue not not bringing it up before somebody ass tells them that I was eating so they ended up cutting into the leaders big ass flabby body. Carving what is left of my mangled body out. Just to look me for all the magic items I had ny in my gold. That is how my last character died. Being knocked out fat to a lard ass and then suffocated then having my dead lifeless body crushed.

[Misterwhisper]

4 times I have been killed because the dead body of a major enemy fell on me when we killed it.

[Waterdeep Merch]

I was DMing a group of four that had two members who were squabbling out of game back in 3.5. We were playing an Eberron adventure module, I believe Shadows of the Last War (correct me if I'm wrong, it's been a while). There's a part where the party hitches a ride on an elemental-powered cart across the Blade Desert.

The two squabbling PC's ended up deciding to PvP in the middle of the cart. The other players end up getting dragged into it. In an effort to stop the fighting, one of them ends up, in short order- killing the driver, destroying the cart, and releasing the elemental, who promptly flees.

The two squabbling characters are dead by the end of it, another player got killed trying to stop the elemental, and the fourth died to exposure trying to return to the nearest civilized outpost.

I didn't touch an official adventure again for almost a decade and have banned PvP in my games ever since.

[Ivor_The_Mad]

Nice. One of my recent deaths was with my fighter with a +3 vorpal adamantine longsword. During a dungeon we had just killed our targets body guards and he started to run. Our caster and range was busy fighting some constructs and flesh golems. So instead of chasing the villain my fighter threw his sword. Sadly he got a nat 1 and his sword went flying through the air and hit the wall. Because my fighter has a Str of 29 (belt of storm giant strength) and partly because of my mean DM (I may or may not have pissed him off earlier) the sword instead of falling to the ground bounced back toward my head but my DM was feeling merciful so I got to role a Dex check. Nat 1. The +3 VORPLE Longsword cuts clean through my neck decapitating me instantly. Just to make it worse my group took my amazing sword and soled it. I should stop playing with a CE adventure group. They are so unsympathetic.