Paternity Testing in 3.5

[Heikold]

One of my players is demanding a paternity test. His dwarven barbarian is trying to avoid taking responsibility for a half-dwarf-half-troll baby.

How would one go about doing that?

[Jowgen]

The Know Bloodline spell (cleric 3) from Lost Empires of Faerun gives you the "basic ancestry of a creature". The info gathered includes subject's type, race, subrace, and all subtypes; meaning you should also got some other basic info, which could be assumed sufficient to provide a paternity test.

At the very least, the spell cast on both parties should allow you to compare their respective ancestry as to provide a bit of an indication.

[Cisturn]

You could scry to find your setting's version of Maury Povich,

Thragdar, you are the father!

[Geigan]

Cleric with Commune. Wizard with Contact Other Plane. Use higher level divination effects if you want more certainty, but I imagine a cleric of a major dwarven deity would probably be the closest thing to an authority on the subject. Make sure to give the player the disapproving stare of the judging clergy while you do it.

[Jopustopin]

lol he had sex with a troll.

[Yklikt]

Maybe a very sexy troll

[Necroticplague]

Divination spells by a trusted third party.

[AnimeTheCat]

well... in the absence of magic... you could follow medieval rules for when kings were off fighting and made bastard children. If a child can gain enough clout with other trusted parties he can press a claim, he can then use said claim to try and get recognized as a legitimized bastard. If the individual declines, typically fighting ensues and whoever wins gets the spoils (a legitimized bastard on the end of the half troll-dwarf, or no responsibility on the end of the party dwarf barbarian).

Or yeah. D&D... Magic.

[Vizzerdrix]

BoEF has spells for this.

[the_david]

I'd recommend the commune spell cast by a cleric of a god of secrets or maybe a dwarven family/fertility goddess. You'd have to find a 9th level cleric and cough up 975 gp. Don't forget that you get 8 questions after the important one, so if mr. Barbarian knows what he's doing he could get valuable information.

[Telonius]

BoEF has spells for this.

Yes, I believe it does. (At work, so no way in Baator am I checking the source on that!)

[Heikold]

BOEF is a great shout. I forgot that it existed. Thanks!

Commune could indeed work though. I'll be baking the Cleric Jeremiah Kyle.

[flappeercraft]

The spell Identify transgressor from BoVD could work if worded right

[ellindsey]

Analyze Ancestry (from the BoEF) is a great spell, and one that can be imported into a completely normal non-adult-themed game.

[molten_dragon]

BoEF has spells for this.

Yeah, oddly enough there are a few scenarios where that book actually has helpful content, and this is one of them.

I ended up using the pregnancy durations from it it in a Kingmaker game a few years ago when we needed to know how long it would take the king and queen to produce an heir.

[TheFurith]

Other than have everyone in the room look at him like a lunatic for demanding something that does not exist?

How many dwarves is this troll hooking up with that this is even needed?

I swear dwarves will mate with anything though. I remember being in a party with one once that used to sneak off in the middle of the night to look for sheep. Or was it goats? Either way.