LGBTAI+ #59: Will You Take This Woman To Be Your Galpal?

[noparlpf]

Is call me by your name any good?

I want to like this movie so much, but I find so alien and difficult to relate to attractive, rich and young guys having fun in understanding families with no gayangst going on.

Disclaimer: I have not actually watched it. This is based on a friend mentioning how terrible it is and then reading through an online synopsis. In my opinion it sounds like garbage. You can tell something is going to be bad when they start by describing the minor child as "precocious." There is no situation in which a 24-year-old should be engaging in a romantic (let alone sexual) relationship with a 17-year-old.

[Sahe]

I have not seen the movie, as a) romantic dramas are not the type of movie I watch in cinema and b) as a trans lesbian a drama about two gay men doesn't particularly interest me.

Because it was mentioned, I personally don't think that a relationship between a 17 year old and a 24 year old is particularly problematic. But then again I'm from Germany and we have ages of consent of 14/16/18 so there I have a different cultural background on that.

[noparlpf]

I think the age of consent is 16 in the state where I grew up, with "close in age" caveats for younger kids. When I was a teenager I didn't think there was anything wrong with age gaps of several years. But now I'm 24 and I can see what 17-year-olds are like from this side of it (my sister is 17 and I can guarantee she doesn't belong anywhere near people my age). Plus since recently I've been trying to deal with my baggage from a past abusive relationship I've been reading more about abuse and power dynamics and whatnot. There are huge differences in both neurologic development and life experience between differences of even 2-3 years when it comes to adolescents and young adults. In some individual cases an age gap of a few years might work ok, but it sets up the potential for an abusive situation too often for me to really consider it generally safe, let alone condone it. (Edit: I think larger age gaps are ok in adult relationships, but I don't think people are really "adult" until their late 20s. Like I'd be ok with a 40-year-old dating a 60-year-old but it's definitely sketchy if a 40-year-old is dating a 20-year-old.)

[ve4grm]

--self deleted--

[Dire Moose]

After my last post, it seemed time for a photo update again. 4 months into second puberty now.

Spoiler

Show

[Jormengand]

{scrubbed}

[Comrade]

{scrubbed}

[Lycunadari]

Why is getting a haircut so much more expensive for women than for men? I'm looking at the prices for various things (just a haircut, colour, styling etc.) and everything is at least 20€ more for women than for men. And it's not just depending on length, because the women's prices listed are often just starting prices, so it can get even more expensive if you have longer hair. (Like, a combination of washing, cutting, dying and styling starts at 68€ for women but is only 43€ for men; though apparently they plan 2 hours for women and only one for men.)
I'm trying to book an appointment with this hairdresser and have to pick online what I want to have done with my hair, and I have to decide between the much cheaper options for men or the more expensive options for women, so now I'm wondering if I could get away with picking the men's option- I have fairly short hair and I could probably pass for male from how I look, but my voice makes actually passing as male virtually impossible and I'm scared how they'd react to someone booking one of the man options who's "actually a woman". :/

[Jormengand]

{scrubbed}

[Sahe]

Why is getting a haircut so much more expensive for women than for men? I'm looking at the prices for various things (just a haircut, colour, styling etc.) and everything is at least 20€ more for women than for men. And it's not just depending on length, because the women's prices listed are often just starting prices, so it can get even more expensive if you have longer hair. (Like, a combination of washing, cutting, dying and styling starts at 68€ for women but is only 43€ for men; though apparently they plan 2 hours for women and only one for men.)
I'm trying to book an appointment with this hairdresser and have to pick online what I want to have done with my hair, and I have to decide between the much cheaper options for men or the more expensive options for women, so now I'm wondering if I could get away with picking the men's option- I have fairly short hair and I could probably pass for male from how I look, but my voice makes actually passing as male virtually impossible and I'm scared how they'd react to someone booking one of the man options who's "actually a woman". :/

Mmh, around the corner where I live is a hairdresser who has a base prices for everything regardless of gender. I don't even think they take appointments, you just walk in and wait until someone's free. I only went there once after a failed attempt of cutting my own hair they repaired the damage (and the guy had great fun joking about that :D) I've been growing my hair out since. I'm also in Germany and in the city I lived in before there was a similar place. So maybe you could look around for something similar in your area.

Also: Over Easter I'll be coming out to my two younger brothers...hope it goes well and they don't think I'm making an April fools joke

[EternalMelon]

Why is getting a haircut so much more expensive for women than for men? I'm looking at the prices for various things (just a haircut, colour, styling etc.) and everything is at least 20€ more for women than for men. And it's not just depending on length, because the women's prices listed are often just starting prices, so it can get even more expensive if you have longer hair. (Like, a combination of washing, cutting, dying and styling starts at 68€ for women but is only 43€ for men; though apparently they plan 2 hours for women and only one for men.)
I'm trying to book an appointment with this hairdresser and have to pick online what I want to have done with my hair, and I have to decide between the much cheaper options for men or the more expensive options for women, so now I'm wondering if I could get away with picking the men's option- I have fairly short hair and I could probably pass for male from how I look, but my voice makes actually passing as male virtually impossible and I'm scared how they'd react to someone booking one of the man options who's "actually a woman". :/

Women's cuts are more expensive because as a general case women need more time/work to style and cut their hair (as you noted, they believe it would take twice as long to cut and style the women's hair as the men. Men tend to have not only shorter hair, but also simpler cuts, as women tend to put more . (also men tend to less worried about how their hair works as long as its functional.) Both my brother and I have historically had very long hair, and are commonly charged women's prices. On the flip-side, from what I've heard from short haired women, as long as you don't mid getting a men's cut they should be fine with charging you for less.

[Florian]

Jepp. Used to wear my hair long in my youth, for head banging and such, and was also priced like a woman. Nowadays? Maybe 15 bucks and out under half an hour.

[Lentrax]

Waxing your chest hair really hurts.

That is all.

[Sahe]

Waxing your chest hair really hurts.

That is all.

That's the reason I've stuck to shaving so far...because I'm sorta scared of the pain. And I'd have to let it grow to a decent length again, before I could do it.

[Lentrax]

It really isn’t that bad. But I think I need to find a better way to prepare my skin for it because I have red bumps from the process.

[AMFV]

Waxing your chest hair really hurts.

That is all.

When I was doing that, I always had the best luck with the foaming NAIR, although the spray NAIR wound up giving me nasty chemical burns. So that's what I'd recommend personally.

[Florian]

Waxing your chest hair really hurts.

That is all.

Most apothecaries carry some sort of skin cooling gel that more or less numbs the upper layers of your epidermis. Use one of those after sunbathing stuff when you're done, should help.

[137beth]

I always found shaving my chest to be easier than shaving my facial hair--i.e., it works pretty well. I've never tried waxing.

[Miraqariftsky]

International Transgender Day of Visibility today, right?
[also, breaking a long hiatus.]
[sorry been away. crap happened.
and sorry haven't read the latest in the thread yet... need sleep agh ]

Here are my... contributions.

https://neshi-farfarer.deviantart.co...2018-738140243

https://neshi-farfarer.deviantart.co...Flag-738145873

https://neshi-farfarer.deviantart.co...city-615318377

~~~~
Ahem!
How are y'all doing, comrades?

Forward, comrades queer.

[Al.]

*hugs* It sucks that this had to happen, but continuing to keep up a toxic relationship is ultimately worse, I think.

Absolutely.

Whilst that part of your biological family are a product of their societal upbringing, and their behaviour is not their fault. It's not yours either. Don't ever feel guilty for removing yourself from interactions which make you unhappy.

[Lentrax]

Someone pretty much told me to commit suicide last night on my stream.

Stay strong, my friends.

I love you all.

You are not alone.

[137beth]

Someone pretty much told me to commit suicide last night on my stream.

Stay strong, my friends.

I love you all.

You are not alone.

Ouch. Did you block them? Please tell me you blocked them.

[Lentrax]

Yeah. But I’m pretty sure there will be more to come.

[JNAProductions]

Yeah. But I’m pretty sure there will be more to come.

*Offers hugs, cookies, and well-wishes.*

That's awful to hear. I mean, people who disagree happen, but for someone to tell you that? That's just awful. I really, really hope they realize that they're being an ass, and change themselves for the better.

Side note-you stream?

[Lentrax]

*Offers hugs, cookies, and well-wishes.*

That's awful to hear. I mean, people who disagree happen, but for someone to tell you that? That's just awful. I really, really hope they realize that they're being an ass, and change themselves for the better.

Side note-you stream?

Hah. I seriously doubt they will. Anyone who prefaces the comment with "I hope what they say about trans suicide rates is true," will likely always be a bigoted idiot. The good thing is, that because he is an idiot who has no idea who I actually am, I can ignore him all the easier. So he can go stuff himself.

And, yeah. I stream. Monday, Wednesday and Friday, with reruns on the off days. If you ever want to see, and you're available, stop by sometime. And you can always follow me on Twitter, where I post a couple hours before, and a few minutes before actually going live. The links are in my sig, if you wanna check it out.

[Sahe]

Stay strong Lentrax.

I'm always baffled.by the pettyness of some people, like don't they have better stuff to do with their time?

[137beth]

Some people get their enjoyment out of harassing others on the internet, I guess. It would be nicer for everyone if they found a less harmful form of entertainment, though.

[Lentrax]

It would be, yeah. But we persevere.

[Sahe]

So today I was found out that a friend of a friend thinks they may be trans and was asked for some advice. Sadly I was at a bit of a loss other than "be supportive, be respectful of names and pronouns, basically be like, like you've been with me". I also wasn't sure what advice, if any, I could give to the trans friend in question.

They live in the UK and apparently in a situation where even cutting their hair would be difficult.

If anything hearing that at least sobered me up a bit about how lucky I have been with my experiences. I came out to my brothers and everything was quite cool. My youngest brother is even quite zealous about correcting others regarding my name and pronouns which was really sweet and cute to see.

[JNAProductions]

So today I was found out that a friend of a friend thinks they may be trans and was asked for some advice. Sadly I was at a bit of a loss other than "be supportive, be respectful of names and pronouns, basically be like, like you've been with me". I also wasn't sure what advice, if any, I could give to the trans friend in question.

They live in the UK and apparently in a situation where even cutting their hair would be difficult.

If anything hearing that at least sobered me up a bit about how lucky I have been with my experiences. I came out to my brothers and everything was quite cool. My youngest brother is even quite zealous about correcting others regarding my name and pronouns which was really sweet and cute to see.

I'll address this in reverse order.

Coming out to your brothers-nice! Glad they're being supportive! It's sad that not everyone has a similar experience to yours, but hey, you got lucky here. Congratulations!

As for your friend... Can you possibly tell us more about their situation? Obviously if you can't, you can't, but without more details, I'm not sure what advice to provide. Best of luck to them, though.