Stuff I just don't understand, post here yours.

[Fiery Diamond]

I would suggest you listen to your own advice friend

"People who stare are always creepy" -> "People should mind their own business*" & "*And to clarify, by "minding my business" I simply mean don't judging what other people do in public."

You are judging people for what they do in public.

"you shouldn't annoy other people with your annoyance. Having an opinion is ok, but it's like having a kinky tatoo in a private part of your body: You don't need to show it to everyone. People may find it disgusting." -> Itself really. You were annoyed by my criteria for what constitutes proper public behaviour, which is fine opinion to have but you don't need to show because then you annoy people with your annoyance.

And of course:
Most things you said -> "The reason I said your personal opinion was weightless was in relation to police yourself what other people do. Now, if your opinion moves you to want a change in the system; now that may be valid. But the point is the same, as long as the law is allowing it, you have no right to push anyone to fit your personal standards."

Why tell me I shouldn't voice my opinion on behaviour that annoys me? The law allows me to say what I want so surely your opinioj with regards to my behaviour is completetly weightless and you have no right to push me to fit your personal standard.

If you're that annoyed by someone voicing an opinion you disagree with may I suggest Pyschoanalysis? Mental discomfort isn't something you deal with by trying to enforce the world to shape it as your desire.

I mean, to be honest if you were that annoyed by how I believe the world should be (a believe I don't even try to enforce) you could have just ignored it. You didn't have to read, nobody was pointing a gun at you.

I'm terrible with images and gifs, so...

*Claps*

[Lord Joeltion]

I would suggest you listen to your own advice friend

"People who stare are always creepy" -> "People should mind their own business*" & "*And to clarify, by "minding my business" I simply mean don't judging what other people do in public."

You are judging people for what they do in public.

Well, honestly I don't think that because I think doing something is creepy I am "judging them" in the sense that I will go and recriminate anything to them. People have all the right to be as creepy and disgusting and ugly and horrible as they want, as long as they don't harm you in any way. For me "judging them" is go and play the judge to them and tell them right our they shouldn't be doing. Or even thinking they shouldn't be doing that. They have their right to be. You can't police them, nor should. That's all I ever meant.

Then again, this could be a linguistic misunderstanding from our personal definition for the word. So, meh.

"you shouldn't annoy other people with your annoyance. Having an opinion is ok, but it's like having a kinky tatoo in a private part of your body: You don't need to show it to everyone. People may find it disgusting." -> Itself really. You were annoyed by my criteria for what constitutes proper public behaviour, which is fine opinion to have but you don't need to show because then you annoy people with your annoyance.

So you are saying my freedom of speech offends your freedom of speech? What the hell are talking, man? What in the Nine Hells? Did I ever told you to shut up? Did I ever questioned you for questioning me back? What's the point of the whole thread if it isn't for discussing these things?

Stop misinterpreting my words, or at least get them some context, for Kami's sake. I mean don't go around telling strangers what they should or should not do. Be disgusted in your head as much as you want, but never think that gives you the right of anything. Or even that you are standing on a higher moral ground. All people is equal, "disgusting" or not.

And of course:
Most things you said -> "The reason I said your personal opinion was weightless was in relation to police yourself what other people do. Now, if your opinion moves you to want a change in the system; now that may be valid. But the point is the same, as long as the law is allowing it, you have no right to push anyone to fit your personal standards."

Why tell me I shouldn't voice my opinion on behaviour that annoys me? The law allows me to say what I want so surely your opinioj with regards to my behaviour is completetly weightless and you have no right to push me to fit your personal standard.

Why do you think when I say "push" people around (my words) I mean "voice" your opinion (your words)? Really man, get down your high horse for a moment and consider the meaning behind words. Of course you have the right to voice your opinion, as twisted as it may be. It is not in your right to put any kind of action in consequence of them. Freedom is speech is just that. Speech. Not policing behaviour of the others.

If you're that annoyed by someone voicing an opinion you disagree with may I suggest Pyschoanalysis? Mental discomfort isn't something you deal with by trying to enforce the world to shape it as your desire.

I mean, to be honest if you were that annoyed by how I believe the world should be (a believe I don't even try to enforce) you could have just ignored it. You didn't have to read, nobody was pointing a gun at you.

Yes, play the card that I am the one disgusted. Play the Trap Card of trying to turn the table against me. Bravo. But it's a miss, actually. You have an opinion. I just happen to live by exactly the opposite.

If you were annoyed because some people have an opinion on your own opinions, then you should consider where you publish your "vision of the world", don't you think? Nobody pointed a gun at you to write your opinions in a public forum. The proper way to use the words of others against themselves is when they actually make sense, not when they only make you feel special :)

[Fiery Diamond]

Well, honestly I don't think that because I think doing something is creepy I am "judging them" in the sense that I will go and recriminate anything to them. People have all the right to be as creepy and disgusting and ugly and horrible as they want, as long as they don't harm you in any way. For me "judging them" is go and play the judge to them and tell them right our they shouldn't be doing. Or even thinking they shouldn't be doing that. They have their right to be. You can't police them, nor should. That's all I ever meant.

Then again, this could be a linguistic misunderstanding from our personal definition for the word. So, meh.


So you are saying my freedom of speech offends your freedom of speech? What the hell are talking, man? What in the Nine Hells? Did I ever told you to shut up? Did I ever questioned you for questioning me back? What's the point of the whole thread if it isn't for discussing these things?

Stop misinterpreting my words, or at least get them some context, for Kami's sake. I mean don't go around telling strangers what they should or should not do. Be disgusted in your head as much as you want, but never think that gives you the right of anything. Or even that you are standing on a higher moral ground. All people is equal, "disgusting" or not.


Why do you think when I say "push" people around (my words) I mean "voice" your opinion (your words)? Really man, get down your high horse for a moment and consider the meaning behind words. Of course you have the right to voice your opinion, as twisted as it may be. It is not in your right to put any kind of action in consequence of them. Freedom is speech is just that. Speech. Not policing behaviour of the others.


Yes, play the card that I am the one disgusted. Play the Trap Card of trying to turn the table against me. Bravo. But it's a miss, actually. You have an opinion. I just happen to live by exactly the opposite.

If you were annoyed because some people have an opinion on your own opinions, then you should consider where you publish your "vision of the world", don't you think? Nobody pointed a gun at you to write your opinions in a public forum. The proper way to use the words of others against themselves is when they actually make sense, not when they only make you feel special :)

There's a lot of "distinction without a difference" going on in this post, at least as I see it. You're the one misusing words, not A.A. King.

[Lord Joeltion]

There's a lot of "distinction without a difference" going on in this post, at least as I see it. You're the one misusing words, not A.A. King.

Well, if that's the case, then I apologize. I might get it over my head when I see people trying to police what others should or shouldn't do. Also, English ain't myfirst language, so I'm disadvantaged at making myself clear, I guess.

For me one thing is to think somebody is being weird, disgusting or whatever; freedom also means you can be as horrible or nice as you want, as long as you don't harm anyone (physically or verbally). But trying to police behaviour that doesn't affect you in the least and trying to put shame on it by pointing fingers in public, that simply shouldn't be. That's the only reason I think Democracy works. Also a lot of social improvements are receding lately where I live, so that's a reason for me to be touchy about it too.

And no, I wasn't trying to say King or anyone else here was one of those horrible people. I simply said the logic he used was too similar to other people I met in RL (who are in fact, horrible people) and that I didn't like it

Spoiler

Show

Ugh, I'm not trying to point fingers or accusing you or anything

In retrospective, I can read that sentence with some jerky voice, but that wasn't my intention. Sorry

So I voiced my discomfort about his rethoric (it's the rethoric he used that I don't like, not his opinion on PDA's*). Then he just asked (not in the best manner) how I reconciled my position and I tried to explain accordingly (apparently not in the best manner either), adn I guess at some point we derailed or something (?). And I suppose I got carried away with the words bc of said discomfort.

I still stand with my original point tho, if people aren't OK with the laws they have, they should strive for a change; but nobody has the right to ostracise or try to make other people ashamed for what is accepted under the law (like being married to a goat, or whatever). I don't see any contradiction there, or that it contradicts me not having a strong opinion on how people "should behave".

*heck, I have friends whith similar opinions, and I try to respect them by not doing anything they don't like with my girl in front of them. Just because I try not to judge people, doesn't mean I have total disregard for them, or that I like making them uncomfortable. It's strangers I don't mind, beause.... well, I can't read minds. Yet.

[Ronnocius]

What in the Nine Hells?

I can't believe someone just said "what in the Nine Hells?" That is hilarious.

For the original post, I think spitting in the street is fairly obvious. As for PDA, I agree that people should be more mindful of others. When I was younger there were these kids who were always make out in the halls. I found it quite rude.

[Liquor Box]

I'm with Joeltion to a degree. Just because someone (or even some people) are offended by a PDA, does not put people who engage in that PDA in the wrong.

People are always going to disagree around the fringes of what conduct if offensive/acceptable. Somewhere we have to strike a balance between not causing offence/and not taking offence. Laws (in the case of PDA, those relating to public decency/obscenity) provide a useful starting point for where that standard should lie.

If it is legal though, what gives someone the right to say that their right not to be offended trumps someone else's right to express themselves? There may be occasions, but I am thinking that generally it is easier for the intolerant person to simply avoid taking offence.

[Lacco]

As for PDA, I agree that people should be more mindful of others. When I was younger there were these kids who were always make out in the halls. I found it quite rude.

I also found it quite rude that the ladies did not choose me as their make-out partner

Then I became guilty of participating on the PDA myself. Now I'm... more tolerant

[2D8HP]

On the whole heavy PDA thing, I honestly can't remember the last time I saw one of note (maybe the '90'?).though I'm oblivious to lots of things.

The only things new of note that I've noticed are more electric cars and that tents all over. I've even seen a "tent city" off the freeway that had solar panels!

Are electric cars and "tent cities" just a bay area thing or are they sprouting up elsewhere as well?

[Peelee]

On the whole heavy PDA thing, I honestly can't remember the last time I saw one of note (maybe the '90'?).though I'm oblivious to lots of things.

The only things new of note that I've noticed are more electric cars and that tents all over. I've even seen a "tent city" off the freeway that had solar panels!

Are electric cars and "tent cities" just a bay area thing or are they sprouting up elsewhere as well?

Electric cars, no. You might get a disproportionally higher number due to California laws, but they're definitely a growing market (which I am a HUGE fan of).

Tent cities? Probably. Bay area rent, from what I've heard, is insane

[DataNinja]

Are electric cars and "tent cities" just a bay area thing or are they sprouting up elsewhere as well?

I've been seeing an increasing number of electric cars over the years. But, my home city of Victoria has been having issues with tent cities. We have a housing crisis (less than 0.5% vacancy), and the way it played out, it was just attracting more homeless to our city. Which is a problem when we can't even begin to try and house those who we already had.

So, no, they're certainly not just a 'bay area thing'.

[Knaight]

Tent cities? Probably. Bay area rent, from what I've heard, is insane

There's a few areas in the vicinity of Denver that are approaching tent cities. There's also very few places in the vicinity of Denver where anything that even looks like reasonable rent is to be found.

[Mrc.]

Can I suggest "The whole of my degree"?

[Peelee]

Can I suggest "The whole of my degree"?

Oooo, I like it. What field.

[Mrc.]

Oooo, I like it. What field.

Chemical Engineering. Final year at Huddersfield

[Peelee]

Chemical Engineering. Final year at Huddersfield

Chem engineering?!? You have my sympathy.

[Knaight]

Chem engineering?!? You have my sympathy.

It's actually a really cool and interesting field in my experience*. Sure, the workload is a little obscene at times, and there's a lot of math involved that takes a while to be traced back to equations that make direct sense on their own, and sure there's almost nothing going on that maps to clearly visible physical processes**, but a lot of the basics are simple enough to intuitively internalize, and keep in the back of your mind while you're doing math six or so steps removed from them.

*Technically chemical and biological engineering.
**There's fluid flow, and maybe vapor liquid equilibrium depending on how exactly "clearly visible" is defined.

[Mrc.]

It's great fun and you learn some incredible things (like how due to the different laws of resistance to heat transfer, insulation can actually cool things down. This is the equivalent of putting on a coat and getting colder) and the application: for our final year project we have to design a plant from scratch. But holy crap is it hard at times! Multiphase systems is the bane of my existence right now.

[Peelee]

It's actually a really cool and interesting field in my experience.

Oh, I have no doubt it's cool and interesting. I was referring to the difficulty, from everything I've heard.

[factotum]

It's great fun and you learn some incredible things (like how due to the different laws of resistance to heat transfer, insulation can actually cool things down. This is the equivalent of putting on a coat and getting colder) and the application: for our final year project we have to design a plant from scratch. But holy crap is it hard at times! Multiphase systems is the bane of my existence right now.

I was flatmates with a chemical engineering student in my second year at university nearly 30 years ago. He once said that there was always a large part of any chemical engineering process that was basically a box saying "VENT TO ATMOSPHERE"--guessing that's probably changed in the last few decades!

[Mrc.]

I was flatmates with a chemical engineering student in my second year at university nearly 30 years ago. He once said that there was always a large part of any chemical engineering process that was basically a box saying "VENT TO ATMOSPHERE"--guessing that's probably changed in the last few decades!

Yeah there are loads of laws governing that; we had to do a second year module that covered all the economical and environmental concerns, because these projects are huge investments that often span 20-30 years, and if you have to abandon it halfway through because you're breaking environmental laws or a particular material you're using gets reclassified as illegal, you're losing several millions. It's pretty hefty stuff but I love almost all of it. Just wish I knew more!

[Knaight]

It's great fun and you learn some incredible things (like how due to the different laws of resistance to heat transfer, insulation can actually cool things down. This is the equivalent of putting on a coat and getting colder) and the application: for our final year project we have to design a plant from scratch. But holy crap is it hard at times! Multiphase systems is the bane of my existence right now.

Good old critical insulation thickness - although that's often less a matter of different laws of resistance and more a matter of surface area effects, where the surface area goes up on stuff being insulated* and thus there's a bigger surface area to cool.

*Pipes and the likes, obviously this wouldn't work for houses.

Oh, I have no doubt it's cool and interesting. I was referring to the difficulty, from everything I've heard.

I'm not going to say that it's easy, but I think the difficulty is a bit overstated. From a difficulty perspective I'm very glad I'm doing engineering and not, say, Classics. I can deal with the math, I can't deal with multiple dead languages.

[Peelee]

I'm not going to say that it's easy, but I think the difficulty is a bit overstated. From a difficulty perspective I'm very glad I'm doing engineering and not, say, Classics. I can deal with the math, I can't deal with multiple dead languages.

Well, there's also general usefulness. I had four years of Latin in high school, and was in the top 1000 on the Xbox Live Guitar Hero 3 leaderboards when it hit a million people, and I maintain that the latter has been more useful in life than the former.

[Amazon]

The fact we have to be sad when soemone die, I rather do it like the mexicans party and celebrate, death is part of nature why the need to be sad?

[Lvl 2 Expert]

The fact we have to be sad when soemone die, I rather do it like the mexicans party and celebrate, death is part of nature why the need to be sad?

We're not sad they died, we're sad they stopped being alive. It's kind of a definitive end to knowing a nice person. And it's sad for them too, that they stopped being a nice person. And since they can't be sad about that anymore, we're sad on their behalf.

EDIT: In theory I sort of agree with you, in practice when someone I know well dies I feel sad.

[Amazon]

We're not sad they died, we're sad they stopped being alive. It's kind of a definitive end to knowing a nice person. And it's sad for them too, that they stopped being a nice person. And since they can't be sad about that anymore, we're sad on their behalf.

EDIT: In theory I sort of agree with you, in practice when someone I know well dies I feel sad.

I still don't get it. I don't feel sad at all but then i feel gulty for not being sad.

It's part of life and being sad won't bring the person back so what's the point?

[Peelee]

I still don't get it. I don't feel sad at all but then i feel gulty for not being sad.

It's part of life and being sad won't bring the person back so what's the point?

Because my family member/close friend is gone and I'll never get to be with them ever again.

Pretty damn sad, that. You don't HAVE to be sad. Nobody forces you. But chances are you will be.

[ve4grm]

I still don't get it. I don't feel sad at all but then i feel gulty for not being sad.

It's part of life and being sad won't bring the person back so what's the point?

You aren't alone on that. Some of us are wired to grieve differently than others, no need to feel guilty about it. So far I've only had one funeral that I was at the edge of tears for, and I was going through some other things at the time that contributed to that.

My grandma passed away when I was 8, after being very sick for a long while. When my mom told me in the morning, my response was: "Oh. That's good. She didn't want to go to the care home anyways."

So yeah, don't feel guilty for not being sad. If your grieving is just remembering the happy times you had, more power to you. Just be aware that others will be sad and respect that, and everything's cool.

[2D8HP]

I originally posted this at another thread, but it seems to fit here

....I fear I'm being turned into a kind of sociopath, and I also fear that may be for the best.

In the last month at work, and getting to and from my job I've seem multiple corpses, hundreds of homeless beggars, and many hundreds of imprisoned men.

The month before last I went to do an annual inspection (of part of the water supply system) at the Richmond Police Station, and an older woman came crying that she lost her granddaughter, and unlike my co-worker I couldn't even pretend to care or offer any reassurances that she would be found.

Ever so often, something I read, or a song I hear, or a movie I watch will get my eyes misty, but all the actual real-life-in-front-of-me human misery just evokes simmering annoyance and fatigue.

[lunaticfringe]

I originally posted this at another thread, but it seems to fit here



In the last month at work, and getting to and from my job I've seem multiple corpses, hundreds of homeless beggars, and many hundreds of imprisoned men.

The month before last I went to do an annual inspection (of part of the water supply system) at the Richmond Police Station, and an older woman came crying that she lost her granddaughter, and unlike my co-worker I couldn't even pretend to care or offer any reassurances that she would be found.

Ever so often, something I read, or a song I hear, or a movie I watch will get my eyes misty, but all the actual real-life-in-front-of-me human misery just evokes simmering annoyance and fatigue.

Empathy is uncomfortable. It does not release Happy Fun Time Chemicals in your brain when you are exposed to human misery. You get a hit of Suffering. Shutting down, stonewalling, avoiding people in pain, anger, frustration, and general prickish behavior happen. Especially if repeatedly exposed to sad situations, which it sounds you have been.

I was a bad friend when my best friend got divorced. I couldn't take it anymore. I was and still am good friends with his Ex. I listened to both their Sad for a year & half before they split. Apparently I'm very understanding, nonjudgemental (this is Crap, I just know when to STFU & Comfort), and easy to talk to. It really sucks sometimes.

Art is totally designed to **** with your feelings, so mission accomplished on the Artist's part. I jokingly & lovingly refer to Creatives as Emotional Terrorists (go be in a LTR with one). Sounds like you may be a bit Burned Out. Perfectly Human of you.

[Green Elf]

Also, I hate sports.

I really need to change my signature to a compilation of "I hate sports".

Actually, If anyone can send a quote of "I hate sports"/ "Also, I hate sports" etc., It would be very much appreciated.

Also, I hate sports. :)