On hair (and the cutting thereof): Why am I so gullible?

[Ranis]

I don't think I'll be able to get through the meetup without photos being snapped, so you'll have your blackmail material pictures in a few days. I don't see how it could come to pass that nobody takes a camera.

Sorry Phoe, I'm bringing a nice digital camera. There was a warning about it in the meetup thread.

And in your defense, I typically can't stand short haircuts on women, so I'm with you on the long-hairness. I'm actually quite a sucker for long hair; I had a huge crush on this chick in high school that had bright red hair down past her knees. *swoon*

[AtomicKitKat]

I can sympathise. I had to get my hair cut practically every month till I was 16, then I spent a year bumming around polytechnic with a cut every 4 months or so. After that, 2 years in the army, followed by 3 years without a haircut(down to the waist!), then I've been getting it cut about 1 week before any time I need to return to the army.

Edit: Oh yeah, and the main reason I don't like having it cut. Everyone keeps saying how much I look like my dad. And he's always harping on at me about my skin, or my hair, etc. Seriously. I made it to 14 before I got my first zit. And even then, they only come in sporadic bursts. Usually brought on by stress caused by him literally pointing them out to me. As if I can't tell what's on my own face? *deep breaths. Or as deep as possible with fluid in the lungs*

[SweetLikeLemons]

Have you washed it yet? In my experience, bad haircuts don't look quite so bad after you get a chance to wash your hair (just like the good haircuts will never look nearly as good as when you first get home from having them done). If that doesn't work, someone already mentioned gel. I second that. If you play with it you may find a way to make it slightly more tolerable until it grows out a bit.
Um... otherwise... hats?

[zeratul]

Siblings are notoriously bad judges of one's appearance. Id' hate to think what'd happen if I listened to mine.

Someone finally understands *hug*. Ugh I'd have short hair if it were up to them. I love them to death, and they have good taste in their own appearence, but not mine.

[PhoeKun]

Have you washed it yet? In my experience, bad haircuts don't look quite so bad after you get a chance to wash your hair (just like the good haircuts will never look nearly as good as when you first get home from having them done). If that doesn't work, someone already mentioned gel. I second that. If you play with it you may find a way to make it slightly more tolerable until it grows out a bit.
Um... otherwise... hats?

I just got out of the shower, actually. I also came this close: --><-- to crying while I was combing it. All I can really do at the moment is hope it looks better after it finishes drying.

Are there any particular tricks to using gel in hair? I've never really tried to do much with gel before...

[Vhaidara]

I'll accept tricks. I recently started growing it long (to the point where it's getting into my eyes), and s***** starts in a few weeks.

[Amotis]

*cuddle*

Oh stop worrying. You get me tomorrow.

But I also think that it's a common thing for haircutter to do two or three more inches then you tell them to. It happens to me all the time. I also hope that it had nothing to do with my affinity for short hair. That would suck and probably not probable as you're not that easily swayed.

Not gel so much, it seems, but that molding stuff might work to your favor for a more feminine flavor. The ones that kinda let you mess with the body of the hair, kinda layer it yourself, loosens it more then holds it like gel does. I might have some laying around and bring you some. Yes...I have hair products. Sue me.

But calm down, silly.

[SDF]

When I got my haircut a few weeks ago I brought freaking pictures of how I wanted it and she cut it WAY shorter. Eh, I look good regardless but this time I think I'm going to go for Peter Fonda, Easy Rider hair.

[Last_resort_33]

ummmm..... short....... hair???

nah... I don't get it?

is that some kind of band?

Seriously though, hair grows (I've had 6 years non stop experiance) it'll correct itself in a few months... everyone always thinks that people's hair should be shorter...

If you don't know how to style hair, just brush it lots and you'll be fine

[Inyssius Tor]

I can feel your situation, sort of. Sorry about your hair...

For a long time, I've wanted long hair. Unfortunately, my hair is obstinately curly, so if I don't cut my hair short I just look like an idiot.

[Malik]

I had hair halfway down my back that i had been growing for the past 12 years and today i got it cut off, all i can say is my head and neck now feel cold.

[Dragor]

I can relate to you, Phoe. I like my hair long. It's in the process of getting down my shoulders now, and that's how I want it. Currently I'm in a messy sort of 'Half-Beatle' mop, which I don't like, but it's a means to an end.

"But you've got to have it cut!" moans my mum. Fine. I'll have it trimmed slightly.

At the hairdressers, it's a constant:

"Cut it short, cut it short, cut it short....."

Until I just shout:

"FINE! CUT IT SHORT!" *slump*

Then I end up with short hair again. Just goes to show how annoying peer pressure is.

[Swedish chef]

The hair is a big part to many people. about 2 years ago I got this crazy idea that I should stop cutting my hair down to 1cm and actually get a haircut. I had some ideas wich invulved som highlights but i thought "hey I can fix those myself, how hard can it be?" Fortunately I consulted a fashionsavvy friend of mine and her first question was "who does your hair". When I looked at her dumbstruck she sighed and said something like "You dont have a regular hairperson do you?" So I got some strict instructions to "go and see this girl and ask her. She is great and if your idea works on you she will tell you". So I did, wich resulted in me getting a real hairperson. It is expensive, sure but I have learned a lot about my own hair and gone far from the "uuuh i dunno do something nice" to actually beeing able to describe how I want it.

The point of the story is: Get someone who works proffessionally in hair and ask that person for advice. Ask around amongst your friends to get a good one. Let it be costy, because it will be. If youre not happy with the result, change hairperson. A good one should be able to give you pointers on your hair and recommend a good hairdo. They should also be able to give you some pointers on styling.

[tannish2]

i think the main idea is to not listen to your relatives, they love you, they want whats best for you, but they usually have no ****ing idea what is best for you, and still feel the need to offer advice

[onasuma]

Just remember, sisters know NOTHING about how your hair should look. Mine doesnt even have a clue about her own. Seriously, she complains about being bullied by chavs, and now shes going to dye her hair green. True story.

[Tom_Violence]

I had a 'bad' haircut once that upset me a bit. I was 12 at the time. Then a week later I got on with my life. I think more important than what to do with your hair is working out why it bothers you so much. I mean, its just hair, for goodness sake.

I have hair-views quite contrary to most people on these boards, not that I mind one jot. I personally think really long hair (down to your arse) looks disgusting on girls, and though I've never seen it I can only imagine it would look hilarious on guys. But then, I think that most guys with hair past the ears look daft, and much prefer girls with hair around the shoulders or above.

[Charity]

I had the worst ever hair cut at the age of 15, ignoring all my advice the silly cow hairdresser cut it too short and as i have a double crown, the hair right at the top of my head stood straight up, defying all attempts to tame it, it stayed that way until it grew out. It made me look like a pineapple, not a cool look i can tell thee.
Tom the problem is that most folk use visual clues to determine what they think of you before having met you, particularly when they (and you (not you obviously, you old git, but Phoe, he's quite young)) are young.
If someone has an haircut that makes them look like a plonker, you (not you, you know them, the younguns) are going to think they are a plonker. No matter how much we might feel that looks shouldn't matter we are shown time and again that they do.
Get a cool hat Phoe, and don't worry matey it'll grow... and if it'll make you feel any better, burn down the hairdressers house.

Kidding sheeesh

[Sir_Norbert]

I haven't had a haircut since December 2003. I'm not planning to keep growing it indefinitely, but when the time comes to trim it a little, there's no way I'd trust a stranger with the job. Too difficult to communicate exactly what you want, too easy to come away wishing you'd never gone. I know what that's like.

As for relatives being bad judges: absolutely. My girlfriend's mother has been trying to get her to submit to the scissors :( but fortunately since she knows how much I love her hair, that gives her the strength she needs to stand up for herself.

[Brickwall]

Peer pressure on long hair. Oh, how I feel your pain. I've been trying to grow my hair out for a while now (a year, now), starting from a disastrously short haircut (army-length). My hair as curly as it is, it looked a bit silly for a good portion of that time. I had to endure a lot of negative comments, including from my family. However, it's finally getting past the silly stage, and my endurance is paying off. It's not yet at the length I think it will look best at, but it's no longer totally silly. I need to change my bangs, but other than that.

Moral: the people close to you may sometimes know more about you than you, but don't let anyone else decide how your hair should look. They will always be wrong.

[Penguinsushi]

I can't really relate to your problem, but I can submit that I have a sort of antithesis:

See, I personally think my wife looks *great* with shoulder-length (or just shorter) hair, but, like you, she doesn't like it that short (mostly because it's difficult to get out of her way).

Oh well.

~PS

[AtomicKitKat]

I was reminded again today why I hate my hair short. It seems my head is more vulnerable to those crippling pains at the back of the skull, where it feels like you brain is about to explode from your skull, when my hair is shorter.

[Mad Scientist]

Don't let anyone bully you into a haircut you don't want/like. My advice is to have a style in mind before you go get a haircut. Find a picture of yourself when you loved your hair and bring it along. Or find a picture in a magazine you like. Make sure you discuss what you want and agree before they even get your hair wet. Also, does your hair shrink a lot when it dries? If they cut your hair when it's damp it will be much shorter when it's dry - especially if you have curly or wavy hair. Remember, they can always cut it shorter, but to make it longer you just have to wait for it to grow.

[Mr Croup]

The best part of about a bad hair cut is that it's temporary. Hair grows, and any mishap will mend itself with a little time.

That being said, I feel for you. Getting something done to your hair that isn't what you wanted is a huge bummer. But it will pass. As for the future, you might want to grab a picture of what you're looking for to show your stylist. Also, when you have your hair at a length and style that you like, take a reference picture or two that you can show to a stylist. Of course, once you've found your stylist, it shouldn't be an issue. I'm firmly in the camp of paying a decent chunk of change for someone to cut my hair, because I value the appearance of my hair pretty darn highly, and I don't see a problem for paying a higher rate for a higher skilled person.

In the mean time, try playing with different products. Depending on the texture of your hair, you'll want to use different things. Go drop some change on three or four different products, and see what you can come up with using them each, and in different combinations. Maybe you'll stumble upon something that works for you, and at the very least it'll give you a bit of experience in the styling department.

Just remember, that it'll grow back.

[RandomNPC]

i got a job at a print shop and had to crop a good foot off to get hired, the whole being pulled into a machine by your head thing, not to attractive of an idea. untill then i had my parents on me about cutting it all the time.

[Foolosophy]

I would consider this very wise advice if I were a guy

and then people come and complain that emancipation isn't progressing...

[Gowron]

I consulted a fashionsavvy friend of mine and her first question was "who does your hair". When I looked at her dumbstruck she sighed and said something like "You dont have a regular hairperson do you?" So I got some strict instructions to "go and see this girl and ask her. She is great and if your idea works on you she will tell you". So I did, wich resulted in me getting a real hairperson. It is expensive, sure but I have learned a lot about my own hair and gone far from the "uuuh i dunno do something nice" to actually beeing able to describe how I want it.

All too true. I highly recomend getting a regular hair-person for yourself. I'm pretty un-informative about this whole hair-whacking thing, it's nice to have a skilled dude(tte) of whom you can trust.

yIn nI' je chep!

[AslanCross]

I hate having my hair cut. My mom, who is otherwise a very kind and understanding person, just can't stand it when I have long hair. I get the impression that she thinks I look like an unwashed barbarian or something when my hair is long.

My attitude towards hair got me into trouble in college because of ROTC. I was so glad when the government allowed us to take alternative social service activities instead. Of course, I now have to keep my hair short because I'm a teacher. This whole "long hair = bad, unclean citizen" just really irks me.

[MethodicalMeat]

Ah hair, personally, I love mine. My long, flowing golden locks of luscious, lovely...*trails off, talking about his hair*
Ahem, anyway, Like Mad Scientist said, don't let folks bully you into cutting it.

[LCR]

The hair is a big part to many people. about 2 years ago I got this crazy idea that I should stop cutting my hair down to 1cm and actually get a haircut. I had some ideas wich invulved som highlights but i thought "hey I can fix those myself, how hard can it be?" Fortunately I consulted a fashionsavvy friend of mine and her first question was "who does your hair". When I looked at her dumbstruck she sighed and said something like "You dont have a regular hairperson do you?" So I got some strict instructions to "go and see this girl and ask her. She is great and if your idea works on you she will tell you". So I did, wich resulted in me getting a real hairperson. It is expensive, sure but I have learned a lot about my own hair and gone far from the "uuuh i dunno do something nice" to actually beeing able to describe how I want it.

The point of the story is: Get someone who works proffessionally in hair and ask that person for advice. Ask around amongst your friends to get a good one. Let it be costy, because it will be. If youre not happy with the result, change hairperson. A good one should be able to give you pointers on your hair and recommend a good hairdo. They should also be able to give you some pointers on styling.

Are there any real men here? You've LEARNED something about your hair? The only thing I've ever learned in a barber's shop, is that coiffeuses are best when they keep their mouth shut ("You know, I've been to Poland last week ... Prague's just an A-M-A-Z-I-N-G city ...").

No, really, if I want my hair done, I just tell them I want a haircut like somebody famous. It usually turns out fine for me and I don't have to explain a lot like "yeah, a little shorter on the sides, but GOD, not that short ...".
And yes, my hair looks great, thank you very much.

[Toxic Avenger]

This whole "long hair = bad, unclean citizen" just really irks me.

And it irks me as well. I had long hair once, many years ago. Once I graduated with my engineering degree, though, I cut it short. I figured that my chance of finding a job as an engineer while having long hair would be absolute zero.