Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 30 of 38
  1. - Top - End - #1
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    HalflingRogueGuy

    Join Date
    Jun 2017

    Default How do I tell someone I like them?

    Honestly open to suggestions.

  2. - Top - End - #2
    Titan in the Playground
     
    golentan's Avatar

    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Bottom of a well

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    Have you tried "I like you?" It's a pretty solid opening.
    Spoiler
    Show
    My motto: Repensum Est Canicula.

    Quote Originally Posted by turkishproverb View Post
    I am not getting into a shootout with Golentan. Too many gun-arms.
    Leiningen will win, even if he must lose in the attempt.

    Credit to Astrella for the new party avatar.

  3. - Top - End - #3
    Ogre in the Playground
    Join Date
    Jan 2012

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    Ok first off i should warn you;
    a) I am american
    b)I am male
    c) I grew up surrounded by women
    d) I have no idea how I am not more crazy than I currently am


    Ok with all that out of the way

    The easist method to tell somebody you like them is to:
    Quote Originally Posted by ngilop's advice
    Tell somebody you like them.
    females I have known enjoy it more then a guy is direct than other ways, something about being more sure of themselves and aggressive behavior..

    Males I know *myself included* castly prefer a girl being direct with us. that way we do not have to figure out those crazy mind games and guessing games females tend to create. only to find out w guessed wrong and now we got peppered sprayed in the face or other such actions.

  4. - Top - End - #4
    Bugbear in the Playground
    Join Date
    Nov 2006

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    Be honest, and you can be elaborate and tell people how and why you like them (but you never need a reason!). Just always respect their boundaries

  5. - Top - End - #5
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    An Enemy Spy's Avatar

    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Right behind you
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    Dig through her trash and collect her thrown away items to assemble a shrine to her in your basement. Then send her pictures of this shrine via whatever social media you use anonymously using a fake account. There are two possibilities: A)She will be flattered by the attention thrown her way or B)She will be disturbed and frightened. Both of these are favorable opportunities. In case of the former, you reveal yourself as her secret admirer. In the latter case, you cultivate an atmosphere of fear in her life through relentless stalking, anonymous threats, and constant gaslighting. Meanwhile, you set yourself up as the person she can turn to for emotional support, thus ensuring that so long as she never feels safe, she will never stop needing you. Never ever reveal the truth to her. Nothing sours a relationship like honesty.
    Last edited by An Enemy Spy; 2017-11-03 at 08:50 PM.

  6. - Top - End - #6
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    Peelee's Avatar

    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Location
    Birmingham, AL
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    Quote Originally Posted by golentan View Post
    Have you tried "I like you?" It's a pretty solid opening.
    Look, this is no time for mind games.
    Cuthalion makes great avatars. Like my Silver Dragon.
    Quote Originally Posted by littlebum2002 View Post
    It would be nice to just change the title of this thread to be "stuff about Jedi"

  7. - Top - End - #7
    Dwarf in the Playground
    Join Date
    Dec 2015
    Location
    Regrettably not Hogwarts
    Gender
    Female

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    "I like you" or even "I love you" can be surprisingly ambiguous, depending on context. (Then again, my friend group is oddly tight-knit and affectionate, a lot of circles promote more reserve.)

    "I have a bit of a crush on you, sorry to be weird" or "hey, would you like to go on a date sometime?" are less ambiguous, assuming that was the kind of liking you meant.

  8. - Top - End - #8
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Flumph

    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    Santa Barbara, CA
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    If you feel like being circumspect and all, pick something appropriate for the moment in the conversation... Perhaps something more like:

    "I like spending time with you, probably because I like you"
    "I don't know what I'm doing this weekend, but I like you so hanging out would be nice"
    "Sorry awkward, well you know I like you anyway, ummm how about fish&chips or a movie?"



    and now you see why just saying "I like you" may well be easier?

  9. - Top - End - #9
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Murk's Avatar

    Join Date
    Mar 2013
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    I'm firmly of the opinion that it should be obvious already before you tell.
    You can still tell, heck, you should still tell, but if it comes as a surprise to them, you did something wrong.

    If you're married for forty years you still want to tell your spouse that you love them every now and then, but if they're shocked, or if it was new information... eh, that's no good.
    The same goes for people you haven't been married to for forty years. If you have a very good friend in someone, they should already know without you telling them (because you do friend-stuff). It's still nice to tell them, but they should know.

    As such, I feel that if you're in love with someone, it should be obvious long before you ever say it. Relationships are delicate: you don't want to shock things up. Now, I know that people (especially sappy teenagers) often act like being in love with someone is somehow shameful and you should keep it a secret, but that is silly. You don't want important things like these to be secrets.
    So, the best way to tell someone you like them is by laughing together, by sharing stuff, by spending time together, so that when you say "I like you", their response is somewhere along the lines of "I know" (of course preferably followed by "I like you too".)
    An extra benefit is that it allows them to be more obvious too, so that the response won't be a surprise either.
    Last edited by Murk; 2017-11-04 at 02:50 AM.
    GRIM ESSENCES - a story about silly people in a gloomy setting; a world bound by Plato-esque rules of perception, where wizards roam free, Gods are servants of mankind, and being a plunderer is a valid career choice. Amidst dangers and mysteries of dubious credibility, heroes and villains alike struggle to shape the world to their liking.

  10. - Top - End - #10
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Vinyadan's Avatar

    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    Hey honey, wanna come to my place and watch me brushing my hair?

  11. - Top - End - #11
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Scarlet Knight's Avatar

    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Hudson Valley, NY
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    Quote Originally Posted by Murk View Post
    I'm firmly of the opinion that it should be obvious already before you tell.
    You can still tell, heck, you should still tell, but if it comes as a surprise to them, you did something wrong.

    If you're married for forty years you still want to tell your spouse that you love them every now and then, but if they're shocked, or if it was new information... eh, that's no good.
    I agree; still if you're married 40 years, even if you never said you like her, well, you're doing SOMETHING right. {cue "Fiddler on the Roof- Do you love me?" scene}

    D&DecentPeople never says where they are in the relationship, so I assume this is for a first date. Is it a classmate or a co-worker ( caveat- never ask a direct report)? If so, don't say you like her right off, because you'll have to see her again tomorrow even if she turns you down. Simple ask "Do you want to go get coffee (bite to eat /drinks after work) ?" This allows for comfortable refusal and can be repeated at a later time but no more than 3x. Afterwards, if things go well, say you had fun and would like to do it again. If she says she had fun, now you can ask for a date on Saturday night (refusal is still possible).

    When the relationship firms up a bit ( second -third date), you can say "You're really ( insert endearing trait here); I guess that's one of the reasons I like you so much."

    This is fun because it's been so long since I dated.
    Venite adoremus,
    venite adoremus,
    venite adoremus
    Dominum!

    Avatar by Vrythas

  12. - Top - End - #12
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Vinyadan's Avatar

    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    Hey honey, wanna watch me make a declaration of love?

  13. - Top - End - #13
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    NecromancerGuy

    Join Date
    Jun 2008

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    Words are cheap.
    Speak through your actions. Smile when talking to that person. Talk about your hobbies. Be polite and offer help. Bring cake. Ask whether the person would like to come to your party/hang out.

    A lot of uncertainty comes from the fact that one does not know how a person is going to react. Spend more time with each other and neither one will be surprised.
    Last edited by Thrawn4; 2017-11-04 at 09:22 AM.
    What can change the nature of a man?

  14. - Top - End - #14
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    danzibr's Avatar

    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    Back forty.
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    “Wanna go out?”

    At least in my day, and where I’m from.
    My one and only handbook: My Totemist Handbook
    My one and only homebrew: Book of Flux
    Spoiler
    Show
    A comment on tiers, by Prime32
    Quote Originally Posted by KillianHawkeye View Post
    As a DM, I deal with character death by cheering and giving a fist pump, or maybe a V-for-victory sign. I would also pat myself on the back, but I can't really reach around like that.
      /l、
    ゙(゚、 。 7
     l、゙ ~ヽ
     じしf_, )ノ

  15. - Top - End - #15
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Honest Tiefling's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jun 2011

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    1) Don't do it around others! She might feel obligated to accept/reject. But don't corner her either, and make sure she gets some space afterwards if she wants it.

    2) Don't bring a gift. Save that for when you're dating.

    3) Try complimenting her. What about her do you like? Don't go overboard here, just mention 'Hey, I think you're very sweet, and I would like to take you out on a date' or something.

    4) Don't talk about YOUR hobbies, ask HER questions. What are her hobbies? Favorite color? Favorite foods? Also, if you ever get stuck, I have found that adorable animals are usually a safe topic for most people.
    Quote Originally Posted by Oko and Qailee View Post
    Man, I like this tiefling.
    For all of your completely and utterly honest needs. Zaydos made, Tiefling approved.

  16. - Top - End - #16
    Orc in the Playground
     
    Christopher K.'s Avatar

    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Location
    Mythical Land of Nebraska
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    Experience has shown that saying, "Hey, I think you're a lot of fun to be with. Would you like to go on a date sometime?" tends to produce helpful results, or at least closure.
    Quote Originally Posted by Jaidu View Post
    Wait, but, how would they - what would they - you, sir, have just destroyed my mind.
    TBM Games, 5E content and reviews.
    Latest article: Epic Legacy Player's Guide Review

  17. - Top - End - #17
    Dwarf in the Playground
    Join Date
    Oct 2017

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    If you want to be pretty direct but still a little subtle, I've found it often sends a fairly clear message to test the waters by complementing the person on some physical trait. Not in an ironic way. Not backhandedly. And not unique to how they arranged said feature today. Just honestly and openly. Something like "Hey ~~, you have really nice eyes." Or "You have the best smile." This tends to send a pretty clear message, while not committing you. If they're weird about it, drop it, they're not into you. If they are into you, they will probably respond well.

    IMPORTANT NOTE: Follow the logic. If they are NOT into you, they probably won't love the compliment, but you can back off easily and it's not as vulnerable as telling them you like them.
    If they ARE into you, they probably will respond well to the complement.
    However, this is not to say that necessarily if they respond well to the complement.

  18. - Top - End - #18
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Honest Tiefling's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jun 2011

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    Quote Originally Posted by Meijn View Post
    If you want to be pretty direct but still a little subtle, I've found it often sends a fairly clear message to test the waters by complementing the person on some physical trait.
    Too many times I have heard of people misinterpreting this to be just...Well, a compliment. Even when it is across genders. They might also assume you're trying to pick them up for sex, not romance if you compliment a physical attribute not a personality trait.

    There are reasons I think the direct and honest route is the best.
    Quote Originally Posted by Oko and Qailee View Post
    Man, I like this tiefling.
    For all of your completely and utterly honest needs. Zaydos made, Tiefling approved.

  19. - Top - End - #19
    Pixie in the Playground
    Join Date
    Nov 2017

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    Don't say a thing. Someone will now. Simply. Talking just makes things worst :)
    brigitte

  20. - Top - End - #20
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Lvl 2 Expert's Avatar

    Join Date
    Oct 2014
    Location
    Beer and Chocolateland
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    I've learned that there are two ways. You can tell her you love her, how much you love her. Don't turn away, don't be afraid. Tell her you love her. Or you can Step right up, walk right in, rock this crazy world I'm living in. If love ain't foolish nothing is, I'm dying for your kiss. Come on.








    Then again, I might have been raised by some bad influences.

    (If you don't get the reference, you are the 99%, and probably the good 99%. I just felt like messing about.)





    But yeah, ask them out, if you're of asking out age (12-146). Just don't be too weird if rejected.

    No, I don't need to clarify what weird is, you'll know. It mostly involves calling people a bitch and burning bridges.
    Last edited by Lvl 2 Expert; 2017-11-06 at 06:25 AM.
    The ultimate OOTS cookie cutter nameless soldier is the hobgoblin.

  21. - Top - End - #21
    Dwarf in the Playground
    Join Date
    Dec 2015
    Location
    Regrettably not Hogwarts
    Gender
    Female

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    Quote Originally Posted by Lvl 2 Expert View Post
    No, I don't need to clarify what weird is, you'll know. It mostly involves calling people a bitch and burning bridges.
    It also involves asking to be set up with one of the person's friends.

  22. - Top - End - #22
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Honest Tiefling's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jun 2011

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    Quote Originally Posted by AuthorGirl View Post
    It also involves asking to be set up with one of the person's friends.
    Huh. Probably one of the better responses I've heard of. Apparently I know a lot of creep-bait.
    Quote Originally Posted by Oko and Qailee View Post
    Man, I like this tiefling.
    For all of your completely and utterly honest needs. Zaydos made, Tiefling approved.

  23. - Top - End - #23
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Lvl 2 Expert's Avatar

    Join Date
    Oct 2014
    Location
    Beer and Chocolateland
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    Quote Originally Posted by AuthorGirl View Post
    It also involves asking to be set up with one of the person's friends.
    Nice.

    "No, you don't? And uhh Julia, you think she might be interested? Could you maybe get in a good word for me?

    Hé, you just said no. I'm free to play the field..."

    Or worse:

    "Ah, I was kind of hoping you would say that, you see, I really like Jennifer, and you and her are close..."
    Last edited by Lvl 2 Expert; 2017-11-07 at 02:18 AM.
    The ultimate OOTS cookie cutter nameless soldier is the hobgoblin.

  24. - Top - End - #24
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Rynjin's Avatar

    Join Date
    Sep 2016

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    Quote Originally Posted by Thrawn4 View Post
    Words are cheap.
    Speak through your actions. Smile when talking to that person. Talk about your hobbies. Be polite and offer help. Bring cake. Ask whether the person would like to come to your party/hang out.

    A lot of uncertainty comes from the fact that one does not know how a person is going to react. Spend more time with each other and neither one will be surprised.
    Words are undervalued and people are stupid. At least when it comes to picking up romantic signals. Truer the younger you are, but applies to everyone.

    Everything you said right there applies to a friend as much as a romantic partner. It doesn't signal anything more than you're friendly and you like hanging out. Behavior like that with the false assurance that someone will recognize and acknowledge you're romantically interested is how the "friendzone" myth gets propagated.

    "Words are undervalued" applies to more aspects than the initial opener, mind you. Expecting the other person to read your mind over if or why you feel a certain way causes nothing but trouble.
    Spoiler: Play by Post
    Show

    Sinner and Innocent OOC IC

    Carrion Crown: OOC IC

    Skull and Shackles: OOC

  25. - Top - End - #25
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Murk's Avatar

    Join Date
    Mar 2013
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    Quote Originally Posted by Rynjin View Post
    Words are undervalued and people are stupid. At least when it comes to picking up romantic signals. Truer the younger you are, but applies to everyone.

    Everything you said right there applies to a friend as much as a romantic partner. It doesn't signal anything more than you're friendly and you like hanging out. Behavior like that with the false assurance that someone will recognize and acknowledge you're romantically interested is how the "friendzone" myth gets propagated.

    "Words are undervalued" applies to more aspects than the initial opener, mind you. Expecting the other person to read your mind over if or why you feel a certain way causes nothing but trouble.
    It's a good start though, exactly because it is the same as being friends.
    So often I hear people talking about their crush who they are so in love with, but haven't ever had a conversation with. Then, when encouraged to simply say "I like you" or "Want to go on a date?", just like the OP here is encouraged, they get rejected - probably because they asked someone who barely knows them out.

    Getting friendly with someone until you're comfortable with them and they are comfortable with you is a great strategy. It means that you can guess at their response. If you are truly good friends with them, and didn't actively try to hide your interest, they won't even be surprised when you tell them you like them.

    Of course, this completely agrees with "words are undervalued", but hanging out with people first rather than barging in and starting to talk about love is still a good thing.
    GRIM ESSENCES - a story about silly people in a gloomy setting; a world bound by Plato-esque rules of perception, where wizards roam free, Gods are servants of mankind, and being a plunderer is a valid career choice. Amidst dangers and mysteries of dubious credibility, heroes and villains alike struggle to shape the world to their liking.

  26. - Top - End - #26
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Cozzer's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jul 2014
    Location
    Italy
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    "Ah, I was kind of hoping you would say that, you see, I really like Jennifer, and you and her are close..."
    Hey, if you say this with the right tone, this can be top-tier material! The hard part is making her exactly 99% (not less, but not 100% either) sure you're joking.

  27. - Top - End - #27
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    NecromancerGuy

    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    Night Vale
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    I tend to take a slightly more complex approach to this kind of thing.
    Step 1: make a full map of the all relationships involving either of you to at least the second degree of separation. Higher orders are helpful here, but computationally expensive.
    Step 2: find the average degree of minimum separation from either you or the person you're interested in in the graph.
    Step 3: find someone who has separation of 1 from each of you and ask them if they could see the two of you working as a couple.
    Step 4: repeat step 3 until you are sure that someone you talked to in 3 has mentioned your interest to the one you're interested in (I am really being hard on pronouns here, hopefully this is clearer than mud.), or you run out of people who qualify for use in 3.
    Step 5: Classified
    Step 6: sack Carthage. If either of you happen to live in Carthage, try sacking some other city for their honnor. Let the total profit in 2003 GBP from the sacking be x. If log(x)/log(number from step 2) is greater than the number of animals in your flocks, ask them to a seashore date. If the number is less than that, ask them on an inland date. If the number is equal, take them hot air balooning.

    Note: I'm not sure why the value of the GBP from 2003 is used, but it hasn't let me down yet.

    Note 2: If you have been following world events lately, you may know that Carthage has not been sacked in the last couple years. This algorithm for dating has seen a drastic fall in popularity since the rise of smokeless powder. I dont know if it needs to be updated to a new combination of currency and year to remain useful.

    Note 3: I appologise for not sharing step 5, but I am bound by self preservation and 3 separate NDAs to never reveal what it is (I do not wish to cross the people with the yellow helicopters, they're scary no matter what Cecil says on my local radio).
    Avatar by TheGiant
    B.S. in Statistics - University of Minnesota <- as of May 2017, still pretty excited : )
    Long-form Sig

  28. - Top - End - #28
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    danzibr's Avatar

    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    Back forty.
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    What if the result from step 2 is 1? You’re dividing by log(1).
    My one and only handbook: My Totemist Handbook
    My one and only homebrew: Book of Flux
    Spoiler
    Show
    A comment on tiers, by Prime32
    Quote Originally Posted by KillianHawkeye View Post
    As a DM, I deal with character death by cheering and giving a fist pump, or maybe a V-for-victory sign. I would also pat myself on the back, but I can't really reach around like that.
      /l、
    ゙(゚、 。 7
     l、゙ ~ヽ
     じしf_, )ノ

  29. - Top - End - #29
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    NecromancerGuy

    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    Night Vale
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    Quote Originally Posted by danzibr View Post
    What if the result from step 2 is 1? You’re dividing by log(1).
    Minimum degree of separation is 1 (people either of you know directly). Since the graph goes to a minimum of 2 degrees of separation, the only possible way for the average separation to be 1 is for no one that either Alice or Bob know to know someone that doesn't know Alice or Bob (or the complete graph has maximal nodes of value 1). If you're in a small island village pre-internet, this might be theoretically possible, but given that the OP posted this on the internet, I'd say odds are low.
    If you need a better explanation, pm me. I can draw some pictures and/or hop on teamspeak, either of which probably would help for explaining the graph theory.
    Avatar by TheGiant
    B.S. in Statistics - University of Minnesota <- as of May 2017, still pretty excited : )
    Long-form Sig

  30. - Top - End - #30
    Firbolg in the Playground
     
    Heliomance's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Gender
    Female

    Default Re: How do I tell someone I like them?

    Ham it up. "YOU! I like you! I suggest we seek out MANY EXCELLENT ADVENTURES together!

    "Or we could go for coffee, that works too."

    Or follow Neil Gaiman's advice. He's famous, he can't be wrong!
    Last edited by Heliomance; 2017-11-09 at 03:08 AM.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •